Archive of Our Own ^beta

In hindsight, Jeongguk should’ve known not to shake Yoongi’s hand. He should’ve known not to agree to a bet his hyung came up with. 

But at the end of the day—whether today as he walks into his and Yoongi’s shared kitchen and is left to face a man’s bare torso, or three weeks ago when he and Yoongi were arguing in their living room before settling on a bet—Jeongguk was competitive down to his very core. 

He was never one to say no to things he’s sure he would win. It was a fatal flaw of his—Yoongi reminded him of it often. He had joked on more than one occasion that Jeongguk was more likely to drink liquid fire than accept defeat. And why would he? Why would he admit loss when the circumstance had been to his favor?

“Don’t you think I’ve gained a bit too much weight too fast?” Yoongi sighed as he plopped into the empty spot on the couch beside Jeongguk. 

Jeongguk had a few words in disagreement to what Yoongi’s just said ready to spill out of his mouth. How can his hyung think he’s gained too much weight? And even if he had, that wasn’t anything to sigh over. But as he watched Yoongi work his way through a pack of chips, dejectedly shoving mouthful after mouthful with another sigh, he thought maybe there was something else that was bugging Yoongi. 

“Don’t be silly, hyung,” Jeongguk huffed, lifting Yoongi’s hands from his lap and laying his head in its place. “I’m pretty sure I can still bench press you.”

Yoongi looked down at Jeongguk pointedly, throwing a potato chip down at his face. “That literally doesn’t mean anything. Your personal record’s at 275 pounds.”

“Exactly what I mean, hyung,” Jeongguk noses at Yoongi’s tummy, lightly biting into the fabric of his shirt. “You’re way too light to be thinking you’re gaining too much weight. What even is too much weight?”

“Whatever,” Yoongi mumbled, potato chip in hand again. “I still think I could afford to lose some pounds.”

“Come to the gym with me then,” Jeongguk sat up. “I could build you a program and you can join me on my meals. It’ll make grocery shopping so much easier too.”

“Or I could just get laid.” 

Jeongguk felt his face contort, and without seeing it for himself, he knows confusion is painted across it. “What?”

“Isn’t that a whole thing?” Yoongi sets the bag of chips down. “Pretty sure I can lose just as much calories having sex as you do at the gym.”

“That’s literally impossible and you know it.”

Yoongi shakes his head. “Do you have poor stamina, Jeongguk-ah? I never would’ve expected that from you of all people.”

“Thinking about me in bed, hyung?” Jeongguk teases, earning not a potato chip thrown at him but a throw pillow instead. “No, but seriously, you can’t lose as much calories doing that. Your best bet is going to the gym with me.”

“I’ll take my chances. I bet I can lose just as much as you do, if not more.”

There’s a challenging glint in Yoongi’s eyes. The ends of his lips curled upwards just enough to let Jeongguk know that he knows what he’s doing. His words were calculated, formed after years of living with Jeongguk and knowing exactly what gets the younger going. His competitive side never did learn to take a backseat once the words I bet were uttered. 

“You got a pen and some paper?”

Yoongi smiled and Jeongguk tried to ignore the way that for once, he feels like he’s signed himself up for something he shouldn’t have. 

The bet was simple. 

They had a month to work out in their preferred methods. Jeongguk would go to the gym thrice a week and Yoongi, well, he would take it to the bedroom how often he’d like and do some cardio . They would both share the same diet, courtesy of Jeongguk’s recipes and Yoongi’s cooking. At the end of the month, they’d weigh themselves one last time and a winner would be named. 

“And the prize?“ Jeongguk asks. 

Yoongi gives it some thought, pen tapping against the letter-sized paper they have the specifics of their bet scribbled on. “We can leave it up to the winner, as we usually do. Anything under the sun up for grabs as long as it won’t be illegal to obtain or won’t harm the person granting it.”

Jeongguk smiles, hand held out for Yoongi to shake. “Not too late to back out, hyung.”

Yoongi laughed, eyes narrowing before letting his fingers fold over Jeongguk’s, their palms clasped together firmly. “Who do you think let you grow into the competitive beast that you are? You’re on, baby.”

Three weeks into that bet, Jeongguk now knows he was the one that should’ve heeded his own words. Not because he was losing, no, definitely not. Or perhaps, he was, just not in a competition he entered willingly. 

Because while he was doing exactly what he was meant to in order to win, he didn’t feel like much of a winner as Yoongi walked out of his bedroom with bruises littering his skin. He felt like nothing other than a loser as he struggled to watch Yoongi wrap his arms around the man cradling Jeongguk’s designated cup in his hands. 

Jeongguk wonders how things ended up the way they had as he mumbles a quick I’m heading out to Yoongi, ignoring the stranger tucked the stray strands of hair behind his hyung’s pink-tinted ears. It certainly hadn’t started out this way, and Jeongguk wonders how just a bet and three weeks could turn his world topsy-turvy. 

—

The thing about living with your best friend is that there are no secrets. 

Roommates essentially have boundaries set. It’s the only way to go about living with a non-family member to guarantee that by the time the lease is up, your friendship won’t end with it. But this rule tends to be forgotten when the person you’re sharing an apartment with is your best friend. 

“Say that again, hyung.” Jeongguk asks. “Say it again but slowly so that you can hear what you’re saying the way I’m hearing it.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes at Jeongguk’s antics. He turns around from where he’s seated in the couch to face the younger as he says, “Do you think you could look at this dick pic to deliberate with me what size condoms I’d need to buy?”

Jeongguk gawks at Yoongi. He knows he asked for it, for him to repeat himself, but the thing is, Jeongguk didn’t actually expect him to. He expected his hyung to at least have one working brain cell that would stop and go hmm, maybe don’t ask that of Jeongguk. 

But he didn’t, obviously, and it made Jeongguk want to throw the gimbap he just made out of their window. “You’re actually serious, aren’t you?” 

Yoongi nods as he gets up from the couch, phone in hand. “Dead serious.” 

A photo of a man’s penis is shoved at Jeongguk’s face without warning. He flinches at the sight of it and suddenly, Jeongguk wishes that today’s meal plan didn’t have such a phallic-shaped object in store for him. 

Without going into too much detail, Jeongguk would say the penis was deserving of fucking his best friend and roommate. A seemingly nice girth, more than enough length (as proven by the remote used for scale), and most importantly, pubic hair trimmed neatly. Jeongguk nods in appreciation and Yoongi swats at his shoulder. 

“If this is you opposed to seeing a dick pic, I’d pay to see you look at one you’re actually interested in seeing.”

Jeongguk smirks down at Yoongi, taking a bite into his gimbap before saying, “You don’t have to pay to see that, hyung. Well,” he pauses dramatically, “at least not with money. Best friend discount, just for you.” He even makes a show of wiggling his eyebrows to be absolutely sure that he gets his point across. 

Yoongi fake gags before waving a finger at Jeongguk’s face. “You wanna fuck me so bad, Jeongguk-ah, it’s starting to show.” He sounds nonchalant about it, but the blush on his cheeks gives him away so easily, Jeongguk has to try to keep his smile from getting any brighter. “Just tell me what size.”

“I’d say a standard one would do, honestly. Or, a size up.” Jeongguk says in between bites. “Either way, tell him I said he has a nice dick when you see him.” 

The corners of Yoongi lips lift just slightly before he rights his face. He deadpans Jeongguk from across the kitchen counter before flipping him off. Reaching in between them, Yoongi takes a bite of the loose carrot slices Jeongguk didn’t use before putting his phone back in his pocket. “Don’t you have a gym to die in?”

Jeongguk nods as he cleans up, washing his hands and grabbing his keys from their holder. “Yeah, I’ll text you when I get there. Let me know how remote dick goes, alright?”

“Whatever you want, baby. Take care.” Yoongi calls out as Jeongguk walks away from him.

Jeongguk feels his ears ring at the pet name like it always does. He calls out to Yoongi before closing the door behind him to say that he isn’t his baby—no matter how good it feels to hear Yoongi call him that.

—

The gym is nearly empty when Jeongguk enters—something he liked about his current semester’s schedule. He had a pretty tight set of classes in the morning, just fifteen minute breaks in between them giving him enough time for him to switch buildings and rooms, and ended just barely after lunch time. Despite Yoongi and his other hyungs telling him constantly about how a schedule that compact would push him to edge, he liked it. He liked it because by the time everyone’s in their classrooms and lecture halls, there would barely be anyone making use of their university’s amenities—including the gym. 

The smile on Jeongguk’s face is automatic the moment he taps his key card by the entrance of the locker room. He offers a small wave hello to the other guy inside, someone whose face seems familiar enough for Jeongguk to pretend to know him. Obviously, the guy thinks so too because as Jeongguk places his gym bag inside his locker, he offers a smile back. 

Jeongguk pulls out his headphones and iPod out of his bag. His brother used to laugh at him for still keeping up with the iPods but Jeongguk didn’t like getting distracted during his time at the gym. Keeping his phone on him as he works through his sets would just make him lose track of what he’s doing as soon as he goes to check it. 

Scrolling through his library, he settles for his usual playlist before doing a couple stretches. Once he’s done, no muscle nor joint left behind, he heads for the power rack and begins loading the weights up onto the bar.

Going to the gym wasn’t always something Jeongguk looked forward to. In all honesty, he only started going because back when he was still living with his brother, he availed of a membership for two. Jeongguk didn’t really have a choice but to go with him since then. And somehow, in between sets of calisthenics and pushing past his personal records, Jeongguk found himself craving more. 

Fast forward to the present, Jeongguk tugs his headphones down to his neck as he feels someone tapping on his shoulder. He sets the barbell down before stepping back. He unclasps the lifting belt wrapped around his waist and wipes the chalk off his hands.

“Sorry, I couldn’t hear you.” He says over the sound of his music playing softly in the background. The man from the locker room is in front of him again, the same familiar face, but not really, looking up at Jeongguk. “Can I help you?”

The man shakes his head before pointing by the door, “I heard your phone ringing.” He rubs at his nape nervously, hand flailing a bit as he tries to explain himself. “At least, I think it was your phone seeing as it’s only me and you in here and I’m sure it wasn’t mine.” 

“Oh,” Jeongguk replies before he hears his ringtone cut through the silence of the gym. “I better get that, then. Thanks for letting me know.” He claps the stranger by the shoulder before running towards the ringing sound. 

Yoongi’s face takes up the screen when Jeongguk gets ahold of his phone. It’s a photo of him and his dog, Holly, back home. Jeongguk smiles instinctively; he’s always loved this picture of Yoongi which makes him love it even more whenever Yoongi calls him out of the blue like this. 

“God, hyung, with how much you call me, you’d think we don’t live with each other. You just can’t get enough of me, can you?” Jeongguk teases. He can already imagine the scowl on Yoongi’s face right afraid the words are out in the air. He hears it too when Yoongi’s scratchy voice reaches his ears. 

“I can’t get enough of your wallet, not you.” Yoongi snickers before continuing. “Can you pick up some tteokbokki on your way home?”

Jeongguk whistles underneath his breath, wolfish smile etched onto his face. “Damn, hyung. remote dick was that good and in that short amount of time?” The moment the words leave his mouth, the inner walls of his cheeks get coated with a sour taste. He blinks it away, confused more than anything as to what it could mean. 

Tteokbokki was something Yoongi ate whenever he got, and Jeongguk quotes, dicked down seven ways to Sunday. It was another item on the list of things Jeongguk didn’t really need to know but came with having Yoongi as a roommate. 

“I’ll save the dirty details for when I’m not on the bus home where old ladies can overhear.” Yoongi chuckles. “I don’t want to be the cause of someone’s heart attack, but yes. Definitely, yes.”

That was another thing about Yoongi that Jeongguk found out as they went from best friends to roommates. Yoongi never took the people he fooled around with home. He didn’t mind if Jeongguk did (he never did, but that’s besides the point) but not once has he done it. When Jeongguk asked, he only shrugged, the words I just don’t see the appeal of sharing that part of me with someone I won’t see past the night with ending their conversation on that matter. 

“Alright, alright,” Jeongguk leaned against the row of lockers just in time to see the stranger walk back in to grab his things. “I’ll get you your food as soon as I’m done here.”

Yoongi’s smile can be heard through the phone. “Thanks, Jeongguk-ah. See you at home.”

“Yeah okay,” Jeongguk feels himself smiling back. “See you at home, Yoongi hyung.”

Jeongguk turns to stuff his phone back into his bag. He gives his watch a glance and sees that he’s been at the gym for nearly two and a half hours. Not bad, but not quiet enough to satisfy the itch under his skin. He takes his jug out of his bag along with a small face towel before turning his music back on. 

Right as he hooks his headphones over his head, he sees the stranger approach him. With a sigh, he lowers the volume just enough to hear him. 

“Sorry, I couldn’t help but overhear. You were talking to Yoongi?” He asks with a strange twinge in his voice. Jeongguk can’t place what it is yet but he isn’t sure if he likes it. The man looks him up and down, as if it was the first time he saw him. Jeongguk definitely doesn’t like that. “Yeah, yeah. Tattoos, lip piercing, looks like a bunny. You’re Jeon Jeongguk, right?”

“Uhm,” Jeongguk hesitates, he isn’t sure what direction this conversation is going either. “Yes, why?”

The man’s eyes light up at Jeongguk’s answer. He breathes a sigh of relief before continuing, “That means you’re Min Yoongi’s roommate. Do you think you could give me his number?”

Jeongguk feels himself tense at the request. This isn’t the first time he’s had someone come up to him asking for something like this. People come up to him all the time asking for Yoongi’s number and people come up to Yoongi asking for Jeongguk’s just as much. It’s happened so often that on some nights, he and Yoongi spend all of dinnertime talking about who came up to them asking for and about the other. Because of that, they came up with a go-to response—

“I don’t think hyung would be comfortable with me giving out his number without him knowing.”

The stranger deflates at Jeongguk’s words before he’s reaching into his bag. Jeongguk watches as he tears out a piece of paper and scribbles on it. He knows what the man’s about to say before he even says it. “Could you give him this, then?”

Only when Jeongguk has the scrap piece of paper in his hand does he get hit by that same sour taste in his mouth from earlier. He realizes, as the stranger looks up at him expectantly, that this is the first time in all the times he’s had to experience this that the person didn’t begin the conversation with are you and Yoongi-ssi together?

It didn’t matter, of course, that the man didn’t ask. Jeongguk just found it weird—unusual at best. He’s gotten so used to the taste of denial on his tongue that the question of do you think you could give me his number? feels like a mouthful of Carolina Reaper peppers has just been shoved down his throat.

Eunho . The stranger’s name was Eunho. Honestly, Jeongguk liked it better when he didn’t know, the strange in stranger fit him all too perfectly. Having a name to put to a face didn’t wash away the taste lingering in his mouth. But still, he goes with what he and Yoongi have agreed on and says, “Sure, I’ll let him know.”

Eunho smiles as Jeongguk pockets the note. He’s practically beaming as he gives Jeongguk a pat on the shoulder. “Thank you, Jeongguk-ssi. I’ve honestly had a crush on him since last semester but I think he had a girlfriend then.”

Jeongguk nods because Yoongi did. He doesn’t say anything more, not really knowing what else there is to say. 

Noticing Jeongguk’s silence, Eunho straightens up as he hikes his gym bag back up his shoulder. “Anyway, I’ll let you get back to it. I owe you a bunch, Jeongguk-ssi.”

“Don’t thank me yet, it’s really no problem,” Jeongguk says as Eunho walks past him. He pulls his headphones on and smiles as the silence is replaced by his music. For whatever reason there is, Jeongguk smiles even wider as he whispers to the now empty room, “Knowing hyung, you really shouldn’t be thanking me at all.”

—

The week goes by much like the first day did. 

Jeongguk spends a few hours at the gym only to come home to Yoongi telling him in detail how his sexcapades are doing. 

Remote dick did much better than Jeongguk had expected him to. 

On the first night, after Yoongi brushed off the mention of yet another guy walking up to Jeongguk asking for him, Jeongguk had to sit through Yoongi talk about this thing he does with his tongue that had Jeongguk pinching Yoongi just to check if he was sure he didn’t dream it up. The following night, Yoongi made them some kalguksu before describing to Jeongguk exactly how it is that toys really do make everything more fun for all parties playing. On the third night, Jeongguk is forced to sit and listen to Yoongi retell how he nearly got arrested for public indecency for doing it in the parking lot of the chemistry building. By Friday, Jeongguk goes home with his hands raised in front of him, promptly stopping Yoongi from whatever story it is that he wants to graciously share with Jeongguk. 

It wasn’t that Jeongguk didn’t like hearing about how good Yoongi’s sex life is doing. It was good that his hyung was getting it and getting it good . But in all honesty, Jeongguk was never used to hearing about this side of Yoongi’s life this closely. 

He doesn’t know what it is, maybe it’s the way the detail in Yoongi’s stories makes it almost impossible for Jeongguk not to think of his hyung in those situations, but whatever it is, it’s making Jeongguk feel uneasy. As each night passed, the lump in his throat gets harder to swallow and the tightening of his chest gets harder to ignore. 

Jeongguk didn’t plan on thinking too much about it, and it would’ve been fine if this was a problem only Jeongguk noticed about himself, but come Saturday morning, Jeongguk finds out that it’s more evident than he thought that something’s on his mind. 

“Penny for your thoughts?” Namjoon asks as he wipes the sweat off his brow. “You nearly put 20 pounds too much on the left than the right and deadlifted it.”

Jeongguk looks down at the barbell by the rack. Much to his dismay, Namjoon was right. Apparently, his thoughts were more distracting than he let on. 

With his tongue pressed to the inside of his cheek, Jeongguk tilted his head up at Namjoon. He contemplated whether it was something he could even really explain, but, he supposes, there’s no other way to find out than to ask. 

“What does it mean if hearing about your friend’s sex life is bothering you?”

Namjoon puts his water down from his lips. His brows are furrowed, confusion painted clearly across his face. “I’d say it depends on the context.” He pauses. “Are you horny?”

“What?” Jeongguk sputters, he doesn’t see how that would have anything to do with it. “I don’t think I am, but why?”

“I don’t know,” Namjoon shrugs, sitting down on an empty bench and patting the empty spot beside him which Jeongguk takes immediately. “Maybe you’re bothered because you want a sex life of your own.” It comes off teasing, with a light nudge of Namjoon’s elbow to the side of Jeongguk’s ribs but he understand where he’s coming from. 

“Ignoring the fact that you’re insinuating that I can’t get laid, I don’t think it’s that.” Jeongguk’s hands begin waving in the air, as if he’s physically picking out the words to voice out his thoughts. “It’s more like, I want Yoongi hyung to stop telling me about it because then when I go to bed, all I can think about is him in those situations he keeps telling me about in full detail. It makes me feel guilty.”

“Wait,” Namjoon leans forward, forehead scrunched. “This is about Yoongi hyung? Aren’t you two dating?”

The question isn’t new to Jeongguk at all. Lots of people who don’t know them enough often assume that his relationship with Yoongi was more than just platonic. But Jeongguk had begun to consider Namjoon as a friend. He’s even invited him over to dinner more than once with Yoongi which makes the question that much more out of place. 

“Me and hyung? Dating?” Jeongguk almost wants to laugh. “No, he’s just my best friend—you should know this. But,” he groans, rubbing his face with his hands, “that’s why this feels so much worse.” 

“But,” Namjoon starts before he shakes his head with a sigh. “Never mind, this is why I said it depends on the context.”

“Okay,” Jeongguk trails off. “Do you know what’s wrong with me in this context, then?”

All Namjoon does is laugh humorlessly as he stands and gathers his things. With his hands full holding his phone and his water bottle, Namjoon turns to Jeongguk before heading to the locker room. “Think about the context together with what I assumed, Jeongguk-ah. I’m sure you’ll figure it out.”

Even more confused than before he talked to Namjoon, Jeongguk stands up abruptly. He pulls his headphones back over his ears and cranks the volume out loud enough to drown his own head. 

If Namjoon trusted he could figure it out, that means he will, right?

—

It takes a few days for Jeongguk to realize that Namjoon severely overestimated him. 

Jeongguk couldn’t understand what was wrong with him—but there was something and even Yoongi was beginning to notice. 

It happened thrice before Yoongi finally acknowledged it. 

The first time happened when Jeongguk was doing their laundry and found a foil packet in one of Yoongi’s jeans. 

It was the size he told Yoongi to get so Jeongguk assumed he was still seeing remote dick. The thought had Jeongguk staring at the packet long enough for Yoongi to catch him doing exactly that, clearing his throat to ask if Jeongguk felt up for some steamed pork and salad for dinner. There was a weird glint in his eyes as he watched Jeongguk fumble with his trash, chuckling to himself as he teases Jeongguk for being a snoop. Jeongguk shoos Yoongi off after telling him he’s fine with whatever Yoongi wants for dinner and is soon left with a basket of Yoongi’s clothes and a ripped foil packet in his hand. 

The first time he acknowledged something really must be wrong with him is when he smirks to himself as he throws the wrapper away, humming as he gets back to shoving Yoongi’s clothes into the washing machine. He thinks about the box of condoms in the drawers of his own bedside table—a size bigger than the ones Yoongi forgot to dispose of and the tightness in his chest 

He lets a thought slip through the rational part of his mind before drowning it in laundry detergent and fabric conditioner. A thought that he doesn’t stop thinking every time Yoongi brings up remote dick after that: I could probably fuck Yoongi better than remote dick can.

As soon as Wednesday rolls around, it happens again. Jeongguk feels tingles all over his body, from the tips of his hair down to his toes when Yoongi thanks him for the meal he cooked. 

With the meal plan Jeongguk built to accommodate both him and Yoongi, Wednesdays were designated cheat days, and this week, it was Jeongguk’s turn to cook. Last week, Yoongi cooked them a hearty serving of tangsuyuk and today, Jeongguk decided to splurge a little and prepared galbi-jjim with a side of seaweed rice balls.

It wasn’t really out of the ordinary for Jeongguk to cook as much as he had but Yoongi’s response made it seem like Jeongguk always did it. 

“God,” Yoongi moans as soon as he brings the spoon out of his mouth. “This why I love you the most, baby. This is delicious, you spoil me so much, people are gonna start thinking you’re the hyung.”

Jeongguk’s cheeks flare up at Yoongi’s praise. He wonders, as he watches Yoongi eat mouthful after mouthful, if he says this to just anyone. A pressure builds low in his stomach as he thinks about it and his shoulders tense as he admits to himself that he wishes Yoongi didn’t. 

For the first time since Yoongi replaced his name with the pet name, Jeongguk wished he’s the only one Yoongi spoke to this way—with praise and sentences punctuated with baby.

The last time it happened—the moment Yoongi notices—they were at the cinema. 

It was time for their monthly movie nights and Yoongi was in line to buy their tickets when a couple of guys approached him. 

Jeongguk was coming back from the concession stand as he overheard one of them, a man with permed hair and eyelashes long enough to brush across the highs of his cheeks when he smiled, ask Yoongi for his name. 

“Ah,” Yoongi’s ears reddened at the attention. “It’s Yoongi, how about you?”

“I’m Taehyung,” the same man says with an even bigger smile. “This is Jiminie. We were wondering if you were here alone?” His tone was hopeful as he rocked back and forth on his heels—it didn’t sit well with Jeongguk at all. 

Instead of Yoongi answering the question directed at him, Jeongguk slips an arm around his waist, startling Yoongi just a little. 

“Did I keep you waiting, hyung?” Jeongguk asks sweetly, but with his face turned away from Yoongi’s line of vision, he can’t help the way his eyes turn to slits as he looks at the strangers. “Oh, do you know these people?”

“No, but—“

Yoongi is cut off as Taehyung stutters, “I didn’t know you were here with someone, Yoongi-ssi.’ He bows his head slightly as he apologizes, “Sorry about that, we’ll leave you to it. Come on, Jimin-ah.”

They run off before Yoongi can stop them and Jeongguk feels his chest swell.

Except, once Yoongi faces him, the smile on his face drops to a frown at the sight of Yoongi with furrowed brows. “What did you do that for? They were cute!”

“Me?” Jeongguk retracts his arm from where it was resting over Yoongi’s hip to pop some popcorn into his mouth. “What did I do?”

“You just—“ Yoongi starts but the words turn into a sigh. “If you wanted me all to yourself you could just say that instead of acting like a guard dog.”

Jeongguk chuckles as the line moves forward. He slings his arm around Yoongi’s shoulders and brings him close. “Then, yeah, I do want you all to myself. Is that good enough for you?”

It sounds more serious than Jeongguk intended for it to when he says it, but the sentiment still holds true. He didn’t want to share his time with Yoongi and he knows there’s nothing wrong with that. 

Yoongi mumbles something too low for Jeongguk to catch. But when he asks him to say it again, Yoongi just laughs and says, “Whatever, you’ve just been acting weird recently.”

“Only around you, hyung.” 

Yoongi shrugs Jeongguk’s arm off him to pay for their tickets before heading to their respective cinema. Jeongguk lets himself stay a few steps behind Yoongi as he lets a new thought play on loop on his mind. 

I want you all to myself, hyung. With you, I think I don’t mind this weird feeling at all.

—

Moving around the apartment with Yoongi coming and going began to feel even weirder for Jeongguk. He knew it had something to do with only him and not Yoongi, but beyond that, he didn’t know anything. Truth be told, Jeongguk’s never felt as lost and confused like this since maybe his tenth grade physics class. 

Jeongguk wasn’t a STEM major, not in any means. He wasn’t a biologist or a pre-medicine student, but he did know about the feeling of endorphins rushing through your body. 

When Jeongguk was in one of his human kinetics classes, his professor taught them something Jeongguk never forgot. He said, the body releases endorphins when you exercise, without it your body’s reception of pain won’t be minimized—won’t be reduced. If anything, it won’t allow you to move any further because exercise, at its root, is your body pushing itself to the limit and testing to see how much pain it can endure.

Jeongguk didn’t really get it then. He remembers it but he never understood it. But maybe he started understanding it little by little the past few days, just never in full. 

At least, until today. 

Yoongi sets a plate in front of Jeongguk, the usual chicken breasts with carrots cut into julienne slices along with an unpeeled banana. Jeongguk complains at the dryness of it and Yoongi answers by blaming Jeongguk and his recipes, claiming he only followed what was written in the little booklet they have on top of the kitchen counter. 

“I’m going on a date with Eunho tonight, by the way.” Yoongi says once their conversations lulls to a stop. Jeongguk watches him take a sip of water as if what he said didn’t just have Jeongguk skin burning all over for whatever reason. 

“What?” Jeongguk asks, tone terse, and lips sealed shut in a tight line. “Why?”

“I don’t know,” Yoongi shrugs. His hand reaches up to rub at his nape and Jeongguk can’t help but notice the way his skin turns pink at the action. “Remote dick just isn’t doing what he’s meant to be doing.”

Jeongguk’s grip tightens around his chopsticks. He has to bite his lips lest he tell Yoongi what he’s thinking. If remote dick pleasures you as much as you say he does and he still isn’t enough, why would Eunho be?”

“Plus,” Yoongi continues, “he says he really likes me. I think I could get more from him than I could get from remote dick.”

That’s why.

The chicken in Jeongguk’s mouth feels even drier than ever. He didn’t know Yoongi was talking to Eunho. Hell, he didn’t even know he kept his number after he brushed it off that first night. 

Jeongguk wasn’t used to not knowing everything about Yoongi and if he allowed himself to be honest, he feels hurt over being left out like this. 

He didn’t realize Yoongi was looking for more . He didn’t realize that was an option for Yoongi. But even so, Jeongguk feels his eyebrows furrow. What even did more even entail? Sex on the daily? Dates? Taking care of Yoongi and being cared for back?

Those were just things they already did—all but the sex. Why would Yoongi be looking for that from someone that wasn’t Jeongguk?

“Why would you go to him?” Jeongguk says aloud before he stops himself. His arms are crossed as he continues to run his mouth, “I could give you more.”

The moment the words are out in the air, Jeongguk wants to slap himself across the face. They’re thoughts that have been plaguing his mind the past week but even Jeongguk knows that not all thought have to be voiced out, thought like this one especially. 

Across him, Yoongi blinks at him slowly. The corners of his lips lift slightly before he’s sporting a full grin, gummy smile out for Jeongguk to get lost into. 

“Don’t be silly, baby,” Yoongi taps on Jeongguk’s nose lightly, breaking him out of his thoughts, “You don’t like me that way, so how can you?”

The question had Jeongguk snapping his mouth shut in an instant. Exactly how did Jeongguk think he could give Yoongi what he wanted?

Realizing Jeongguk didn’t have anything to say, Yoongi shakes his head. There’s a soft smile on his face as he taps the table with two fingers, “I’ll get going. I have a date to get to.” He wiggles his eyebrows at Jeongguk as he rounds the kitchen counter before disappearing into the hallway leading to his room.

This. This is what his professor was talking about. 

Sitting stationary, rooted to the spot with his face turned towards where Yoongi’s room is located, Jeongguk feels pain all over. He feels it in full force, no endorphins to minimize the impact. This is what the past week has been about—what he’s been trying to figure out since his conversation with Namjoon. 

The past seven days have just been Jeongguk testing his head and his heart to its limit, testing to see how much exactly it can endure—no endorphins in sight. And this? This pushed Jeongguk past that. 

The context is clear to Jeongguk now. He was jealous. He has been since the bet started—maybe even for every time he was asked about Yoongi, the question of whether they were together quelling the jealousy just enough to let it slip past Jeongguk unnoticed. 

He was jealous of someone else being Yoongi’s more, especially when it could be him instead. 

He was jealous because maybe Yoongi was wrong about him. Maybe Jeongguk did like him that way. 

—

Coming home on a Monday morning to the smell of freshly-brewed coffee isn’t something out of the usual for Jeongguk. But coming home to it after a night he knew Yoongi was out for a workout was definitely unexpected. 

When Yoongi went out for his second date in a row the night before, Jeongguk was left with only his thoughts to accompany him. 

Do I like Yoongi?

He thought about all the times people assumed he did and more—that not only did Jeongguk like Yoongi, his hyung liked him back. Back then, he didn’t see how anyone would ever come to that conclusion. Didn’t understand how people could look at the two of them, arms linked and hips attached, and would come to the conclusion that yup, these two tangle limbs across their sheets once the door to their apartment closes behind them. 

But now, Jeongguk has half a mind to slam his forehead onto the kitchen counter. How could he not have ever assumed anything?

The night ended with Jeongguk not wanting to conclude anything, saved by the bell brought by a text from Namjoon, extending an invite from his boyfriend Seokjin to come to their fraternity’s party. Deciding he has more than enough time to answer the questions, Jeongguk leaves the apartment in minutes. He has time. He’s had years of knowing Yoongi as his best friend and nothing more, surely he needs more than a day and a half to question whether it should’ve been more. 

Come morning, he realizes he overestimated how much time fate has allowed him. Or, if he allows himself to remember the accusatory tone Namjoon had when he told Jeongguk to figure it out, maybe fate has had enough and realized she’s given Jeongguk too much time. 

“Hyung?” Jeongguk calls out as he slips his shoes off by the rack beside their door. The smell of coffee is strong and floods his senses. He hears movement in the kitchen but hears no response to his question. 

Jeongguk’s heart starts to race as he reaches for the umbrella by the wall, his hangover tells him he’s in no condition to fend off a burglar with only his bare fists especially considering how criminally early it is. “Yoongi hyung?”

Slowly, Jeongguk peers around the corner of their kitchen, hair falls over his eyes as he tries to keep his body as far away from coming into view of whoever’s moving around in their apartment. What he sees however, has his heart dropping to his stomach and a lump rising to his throat. 

“Eunho-ssi?”

Jeongguk blinks at the man standing across from him. He eyes him carefully, takes note of his very obvious bed hair and his brows furrow unintentionally. “What are you doing here?”

Eunho looks up from where he’s pouring into what Jeongguk realizes is his mug. His teeth grind at the sight of someone else’s hands on something that’s his. 

“Uhm,” Eunho fumbles. “I was with Yoongi hyung.” 

The way he says it makes it sound like he isn’t too sure of his answer himself. Truthfully, Jeongguk isn’t either. He has half a heart to kick Eunho out because what if he broke in? Maybe Jeongguk’s grip on the umbrella is getting tighter because his instincts are telling him to whack Eunho hard enough to make him leave. Because he isn’t supposed to be here. Because Yoongi doesn’t bring his hookups home and if Eunho’s here, then that means—

“Jeongguk-ah?” 

Jeongguk whips his head towards the sound faster that his head can keep up. His vision blurs before it focuses on the sight of his hyung in a shirt he’s never seen before. It falls until Yoongi’s mid-thigh and Jeongguk has to physically contain himself from checking whether it really is Yoongi that called out his name. Because the Yoongi in front of him truly is a sight to behold. His knees are pink and so are the tips of his ears. Jeongguk wants to drop the umbrella and reach for Yoongi instead. 

Putting two and two together, Jeongguk glances back at the man standing behind the kitchen counter, an arm’s length away from Yoongi before even that distance is closed. 

Only once Yoongi’s arms are snaked around Eunho’s bare waist does Jeongguk realize that he is—bare, shirtless—his shirt no doubt the one Yoongi’s got on. 

Once again, Jeongguk’s eyebrows knit together, his jaw clicks before he breathes out and sets the umbrella down onto the stool by the counter. A voice in his head tells him maybe having a weapon would be worse for him than it would be for whomever would be at the receiving end. The ugly feeling settling in his stomach has him clenching his fingers into fists falling at his sides.

“Are you,” Jeongguk’s voice cracks in the middle and he sees the sleep slip out of Yoongi’s eyes as they widen. He shakes his head when the look on his hyung’s faces registers as concern. Not wanting to worry his hyung for something he has no right to feel, he forces a smile on his face. It’s tight and even the tone of his voice come out the same. “I didn’t expect you to be home.”

“Yeah, well, I didn’t either.” Yoongi gets out as he lets go of Eunho. Jeongguk watches as he reaches up for the cupboard where their mugs are located, his eyes narrowing at the intruder for not even offering to help his hyung. As soon as the hinges of the cupboard clicks, Jeongguk squints at something far worse. The shirt Yoongi’s wearing rides up to reveal his boxers, short and so high up his thighs that Jeongguk catches a glimpse of bruises littered across the soft skin of his hyung. 

Having no control over the thoughts in his head, Jeongguk is flooded with images and scenarios from which Yoongi could have acquired the splotches of pink, blue, and purple that rival the flowers Jeongguk saw outside the shop down their street. 

Like a whirlpool headed towards the Bermuda triangle, Jeongguk’s drowned by his own imagination. He thinks of Yoongi on his back, Eunho in front him, hands gripping his thighs which are wrapped firmly around the other’s hip. He thinks of Yoongi with his back against the wall, skin digging in from how tightly Eunho’s hold on his thighs is. He thinks about Yoongi bent over their dinner table, thighs slamming against the edge with every rough thrust into him. 

Jeongguk wishes so badly that it were him that gave Yoongi those bruises. He wishes so badly that it was his shirt Yoongi’s got on. But even more, he wishes he’s the one to give Yoongi the love he deserves. Love that leaves him pink across his lips more than anywhere else. Love that leaves him smiling in the morning and not squinting at the light as he makes his way to the kitchen after being left from the night before. Jeongguk wishes Yoongi wanted his wishes just as much as he did. 

He lets out a pained noise without meaning to, automatically drawing the attention of Yoongi. 

“Are you okay?”

Despite everything in Jeongguk screaming no, he isn’t okay, he nods wordlessly. 

How was he supposed to tell Yoongi that he wasn’t okay without having to explain something he hasn’t even wrapped his own head around? How was he supposed to tell Yoongi that he wasn’t okay without having to say no, I feel awful seeing how too late translates into real life. That no, I’m not okay because seeing you in someone else’s shirt with knees and elbows and ears shaded in with the color of a summer night’s sunset makes me wish I never told you to stop wearing my shirts. That no, I’m not okay because I’m pretty sure I like you and I hate that it took you wanting and getting more from someone that isn’t me for me to finally accept it.

Eyeing him suspiciously, Yoongi asks him again. 

“I’m fine, hyung.” Jeongguk lets out a shaky breath. He gives one last look at Eunho and swears he catches him smirking at Jeongguk smugly, as if he knows what Jeongguk’s thinking, as if he knew just how much he’s won over Jeongguk. Still, he smiles again once his eyes are back on Yoongi’s, his hyung already looking at him. “I just realized it’s Monday and you know what that means,” he chuckles to try to alleviate the tension. “I have to go to the gym so, I’ll catch you later, hyung. I’ve got a bet to win.”

Not letting the words settle in the air for Yoongi to scrutinize like Jeongguk knows he will, he turns to make his way into his room. Haphazardly, he tosses clothes into his gym bag and packs his headphones along with everything else he needs. Calling out to a now empty kitchen, the pair no doubt already having made their way back into Yoongi’s room, Jeongguk lets them know he’s leaving. 

—

Jeongguk feel the wraps underneath his gloves shift with the last jab he lands on the punching bag. The sand underneath the faux leather dents around the corners of Jeongguk’s fist, a new crater made for every hit. 

He doesn’t know how he let time pass him by as quick as it had. If he’s being honest, he doesn’t even know just exactly how much had passed. But the moment he comes to, the sting in his knuckles are far too pressing for him to ignore and he looks up to see that the hour hand of the gym’s wall clock has already moved forward four numbers. 

Four hours. It’s been four hours since Jeongguk entered the gym with his headphones on full blast, much too loud for him to notice anyone that might’ve tried talking to him while he was there. It’s been fours hours since he felt his heart drop for a reason he wasn’t ready to be—didn’t want to be—certain of. 

Jeongguk liked Yoongi. He likes him but his hyung might already have his heart in someone else’s hands.

It felt weird just thinking about it. Though, somehow, it felt even weirder that he was only considering it now. His friends had asked him about it more times than he can count, his mom even more so. 

Was he really the last one to realize what they had become? What they were? 

Jeongguk shakes the sweat out of his hair with his face towel as he walks back to the locker room. His steps are heavy, defeated, as though he were walking back to his corner in a boxing ring, head hanging between his shoulders as he slumps with no victory to his name. 

When the doors open, he hears the clamor of bells in his ears—shrill—the signal for a round lost and over and done with. The winner of the round, of the match, doesn’t seem to notice Jeongguk’s presence. Deep inside, that makes Jeongguk’s fists curl in on itself even tighter.

“We thought you weren’t going to show up today,” someone Jeongguk doesn’t recognize says. He tries to drown out the chatter, wanting nothing more than to get away from the reminder of how badly Jeongguk’s lost. The attempt is futile as two others laugh at what was just said. 

“You were really late though,” It’s said in a jeering manner. “Was he as good as you thought?”

Jeongguk tenses from behind the locker door, his face hidden in plain sight. The scratches on his knuckles sting, the water bottle he had in hand crinkles as his grip tightens. He hopes he isn’t who he thinks he is. He hopes he’s worrying for nothing. 

“Yoongi?” He recognizes the voice to be Eunho’s and Jeongguk feels himself turn on his heels. The lack of honorific already gives him reason enough to roll his shoulders, but it’s the way he says Yoongi’s name that has Jeongguk walking towards the group. 

Jeongguk didn’t know what he had in planned when he put one foot in front of the other but what Eunho says next seals his fate for him. 

“He’s even more of a whore that we thought.” Eunho puffs his chest out as he brags, treats Yoongi’s name like a faceless name added to a hit-list. “Just before I left too, he let me have a go, and let me tell you, the mouth he has on him.” He laughs and Jeongguk seethes, “Fuck, I should let you guys join us next time.”

“What the fuck did you say?” Unlike Eunho, Jeongguk’s tone is flat, deadpanned as he struggles to maintain his composure. 

“Jeongguk-ssi!” Eunho recoils as he stands, his face draining of color once he turns to face Jeongguk. He can only imagine what his face looks like right now. Going by the way Eunho and his friends are looking at him with shaky eyes, he feels it’s safe to assume he looks just how he feels. 

And Jeongguk? He feels like a time-bomb approaching detonation. 

“Did you hear me?” Jeongguk tilts his head to the side at Eunho, looking down at him with a smile ghosting his lips, a humorless laugh not too far behind. “I said, what the fuck did you say?”

Jeongguk sees the moment gears start turning in Eunho’s head. He also sees though his periphery the way Eunho’s friends are shaking their head at him as if they know nothing good’s going to come out of their friend’s mouth. Jeongguk smiles even wider, taking a step closer towards Eunho and crowding him with no room left to breathe. 

This should be fun , Jeongguk thinks with his tongue poking the inside of his cheek. 

“I said,” Eunho clenches his jaw, “Yoongi is nothing but—“

Jeongguk’s hands are on Eunho before either of them can even blink. The fabric of Eunho’s collar is bunched up between Jeongguk’s fingers, Eunho’s neck turning red at the rough hold. “Say his name with respect or don’t say it at all.”

As best as he can under the current circumstance, Eunho laughs, his voice pinched as he locks eyes with Jeongguk. A look of recognition flashes past his eyes and Jeongguk feels the vein across his temple twitch when Eunho smirks. 

“Is that what this is?” Eunho scoffs, wincing slightly when Jeongguk simply brings his hands closer together. “You’re jealous, aren’t you? Jealous I got with your precious Yoongi hyung before you did.”

The words have Jeongguk’s hands faltering, loosening around the collar of Eunho’s shirt. He watches as Eunho struggle to regain his breath, airways still constricted but not as much as before. 

The thing is, Eunho was right. Not in the way that he phrased it, not in the way that Jeongguk wished he had Yoongi the way he was Eunho’s for the past night. But he was right in the way that Jeongguk wanted it to be him—wanted everything Yoongi wanted to be him . 

Jeongguk feels a hand on his arm, breaking him out of his thoughts. One of Eunho’s friends had approached them, probably taking Jeongguk’s silence as a warning sign and not a moment of clarity. 

“Hey, man,” the stranger says, his head shaking as he looks up at Jeongguk. “Can’t you just let this slide? Eunho’s just stupid and doesn’t stop to think before speaking. Maybe you should check on Yoongi-ssi or something, I don’t know.”

The reminder of his hyung being left alone has Jeongguk’s blood running cold. He doesn’t like the sinking feeling in his stomach any more than he likes the jealousy in his veins. Yoongi needed someone and Jeongguk sure as hell wasn’t going to let it be anyone that isn’t him. 

“You should thank your friend,” Jeongguk grips Eunho’s collar tighter, almost lifting the man off his feet. “He’s the only reason your face is still in tact.” He scoffs at Eunho, the threat louder than his words ever will be. Jeongguk eyes him down one last time before letting him back on the ground. “Don’t ever think you’re allowed to come near hyung again.”

With a forceful shove, Jeongguk walks away, missing the way Eunho stumbles before standing back up on two feet. Jeongguk reaches into his locker to grab his things, not even sparing a moment to close the door nor a glance back at Eunho. 

The cold metal of the locker room door is stark under Jeongguk’s heated skin when Eunho decides to call after Jeongguk, clearly not having had enough.

“Enjoy my leftovers, Jeongguk-ssi. He should still be pretty loose from taking me all night and all morning.”

The smirk is loud through Eunho’s words but so is his friend’s muttered fuck the moment Jeongguk turns to cross the room with long strides. His gym bag is thrown across the floor as the sound of skin crashing on skin resonates across the room. 

“I’ll fucking kill you!” Jeongguk screams as he lands a punch on Eunho’s face, sending him falling backwards and landing on his ass with a thud. 

In a second, Jeongguk’s crouched with one hand gripping Eunho by the collar again. The sting across his knuckles becomes a constant ringing pain in his ears but he’s so filled with rage he can’t find it in himself to care. “You’re a piece of shit!” Each word uttered is emphasized with another hit to Eunho’s face.

Profanities ring loud in the air as Jeongguk’s mind blacks out. Only the thought of giving Eunho what he deserved for talking about Yoongi as if he wasn’t a person drives his actions. 

Throughout their entire conversation, Eunho spoke of Yoongi the way you would with a toy. As if he were something replaceable, something you can toss away once you’ve had your fun. It angered Jeongguk all the more, thinking about the way Yoongi talked about Eunho.

Yoongi thought of Eunho as if he could be someone— the one— all the while Eunho was going behind his back and talking about how he was just another one. 

Hell breaks loose as Eunho’s friends attempt to break them apart once they realize Jeongguk has no intention of stopping this time.

“Get your hands off me!” Jeongguk exclaims as he struggles against someone he doesn’t know. “Let me at him, let me fucking at him!”

In front of him, Eunho flinches as he reaches up to touch his eye. His cheekbone’s already bruising and there’s blood dripping from where his lip is split. “You’re insane! Stay the fuck away from me.” 

“Bold of you to assume I’d ever want anything to do with you.” Jeongguk spits out, the bite in his tone has the people holding him tightening their grip. “You’re nothing but a pathetic excuse of a man.”

Before Eunho can say anything else, the receptionist at the gym enters the locker room accompanied by two security guards. 

“I heard a commotion and decided to call for security before even checking.” She looks over at where Jeongguk’s held with his hands behind his back, twists until she sees Eunho and the small puddle of blood between them. “Clearly, I did the right thing.”

“He fucking lunged at me—“ Eunho tries to point at Jeongguk, but the same friend of his from earlier steps in. 

“We’re terribly sorry for this,” he apologizes turning to Jeongguk and back before continuing. “Things just got a bit out of hand.”

Naturally, the receptionist doesn’t believe it. She takes a few steps towards Jeongguk, eyeing the way he’s no longer trying to shrug off the hands on him. “Jeongguk-ssi, I’ve never seen you cause trouble. Is what he said right?”

Gritting his teeth, Jeongguk finally tugs his arm free. He takes a peek at his knuckles and sees them painted in bright red—blood, both his and Eunho’s. “Yeah,” he breathes out sharply. “Yeah, it just happened and it won’t happen again.”

“Oh, I’m sure it won’t,” the receptionist chuckles, “Both your memberships are getting revoked and you’re banned from returning to this gym.”

Jeongguk can’t say he didn’t expect it, but he can’t help but feel even more angry at Eunho for this. The only silver lining is how Eunho’s clearly more affected by it than Jeongguk is. 

He watches as Eunho tries to reason with the receptionist, pinning it all on Jeongguk and making himself out to be the victim. In the end, Jeongguk gets that last laugh as even Eunho’s friends don’t vouch for his claims. 

“Now, do I need security to bring out or can you do it yourself?”

Jeongguk shakes his head no, saying he knows the way. Behind him, Eunho and his friends shuffle around to get their things before following and exiting the premises. 

Once outside the gym, Jeongguk feels the world crash. So much had happened in so little time and the only thing running through his mind is Yoongi. 

Yoongi. Yoongi. Yoongi. 

Jeongguk wanted nothing more than to run to him. Tell him everything he’s been too foolish to acknowledge, but he knows Yoongi more than he likes him. And he knows that if he showed up at their apartment, eyes still muddled with rage, Yoongi would only worry. 

So Jeongguk walks out of the building and doesn’t stop, doesn’t mind the hours passing through him. He walks until his mind clears and his heart is pitter-pattering harsher than the rain does in the middle of a thunderstorm. 

Jeongguk walks until he doesn’t—until the numbers engraved into the thin strip of metal drilled into their apartment’s door are staring at him, taunting him to come close and enter. 

He rings the doorbell, his keys having been forgotten in his rush to get out in the morning and the bell is shrill. 

Another round, another fight. 

Jeongguk wishes he’s got an angel on his side because this fight’s one he’s not letting himself lose. 

—

The door opens and silence is what greets Jeongguk. 

Yoongi’s lips are pulled tight as he looks at Jeongguk with his arms crossed. Under his gaze, Jeongguk squirms, not used to the way Yoongi’s eyes are narrowed, eyebrows furrowed to match. 

He’s upset over something—somehow, Jeongguk feels like he should be worried. 

But, being in front of Yoongi after the day he just had, Jeongguk only feels the ends of his lips curl upwards. Being in front of Yoongi after realizing he likes him has Jeongguk wanting to just stand and stare at him—memorize every detail of his face he doesn’t already know like the back of his own hand. 

“Hi, hyung,” Jeongguk says, voice so low it’s almost whispered into the silence of their apartment. He can’t help the way his grin turns into a smile once he sees Yoongi falter in whatever problem he seems to have with Jeongguk right now. “Aren’t you gonna let me in?”

Before Yoongi can reply, his eyes catch sight of something the moment Jeongguk hikes the strap of his gym bag higher up his shoulder. The look on Yoongi’s face when he opened the door melts into one Jeongguk is definitely familiar with, letting him know that despite all his efforts, he still ended up worrying Yoongi. 

Without a word, Yoongi turns his back towards Jeongguk and walks to the direction of the kitchen, leaving Jeongguk to take careful steps into their unit. It’s stupid, he knows he can just walk in given that it’s his apartment just as much as it’s Yoongi’s, but he still finds himself wishing Yoongi told him to come in. Or, at the very least, Jeongguk wanted Yoongi to smile at him. 

Instead, all he gets is Yoongi walking back into the living room, sitting on the space beside where Jeongguk’s settled on the couch. Jeongguk sees him set aside a box before he reaches for Jeongguk’s right hand, the hand with more blood than Jeongguk realized and, very obviously, didn’t bother cleaning. 

He’s familiar enough with first aid thanks to a class he took in his freshman year to know that the bottle Yoongi took out to clean his wounds with was going to hurt. Still, the moment the damp cotton touches his skin, Jeongguk can’t help but flinch away, something Yoongi doesn’t apologize for like Jeongguk expects he would. If anything, Jeongguk thinks Yoongi’s smiling. 

Why was he smiling now and not when I came home?

“Are you mad at me?” Jeongguk blurts out. It’s the only reasonable explanation he can think of for how Yoongi’s been acting ever since their door swung open. 

Yoongi hums as he continues what he’s doing. Jeongguk winces when Yoongi presses down harder than Jeongguk knows is necessary. “You disappeared in a hurry this morning and didn’t come back after hours of ignoring my texts. I’m not mad,” Yoongi pauses. “I was worried. And this just proves that I was right to be, look at your hands.”

Jeongguk looks at them, really looks at them for the first time since he entered the gym. The blood on his knuckles have already been wiped away but it only made the damage of his day that much more apparent. He’s got cuts on them, his right hand clearly having taken on more damage than his left. The knuckle on his middle finger was cut, split open and it made so much more sense that the sting of the antiseptic Yoongi used hurt as much as it had. 

“I’m sorry,” Jeongguk finds himself saying, his head hung low. 

Yoongi sighs before setting Jeongguk’s hand down. He twists in his seat to reach back into the kit. “Don’t be. I know what happened.”

That has Jeongguk stiffening in his seat. He didn’t want to tell Yoongi anything because if he told Yoongi about how he got the cuts on his hand, he’ll ask why, and Jeongguk would rather have his jaw broken by Eunho than have to tell Yoongi all the nasty things that’s been said about him.

“How?” Jeongguk asks instead.

“He posted about it—on instagram. He even tried to make it seem like he won the fight but,” Yoongi looks up at Jeongguk, smirk playing against his lips. “You just never lose, don’t you?” 

They both laugh when Jeongguk puffs his chest out, smugly saying of course he doesn’t. He even tilts his face at Yoongi in different angles, “See? Untouched.”

Yoongi nods as he inspects Jeongguk’s face further. He takes his chin between thumb and forefinger before nodding at the lack of bruises or marks. “Yeah, yeah. But,” Yoongi frowns. “People don’t normally punch other people with two hands. So, what the hell did you do?”

Jeongguk feels like he’s being scolded—probably because he is. “Boxed for four hours.”

“And why did you do that?” Yoongi snaps, voice sharp but still, underneath it, Jeongguk knows it’s coming from a place of worry. 

“Don’t know,” Jeongguk’s voice tapers off. “Didn’t like how I felt when I saw you with Eunho this morning.” He clicks his tongue before he’s grumbling, “I should’ve decked that asshole the moment I saw him using my mug.”

“Yeah?” Yoongi hums. “How did you feel?”

Jeongguk tries taking his hand out from Yoongi but the older only holds on tighter so he settles for narrowing his eyes at him instead. “Why are you using your psych voice on me? I think it’s unethical for you use that tone on your clients to get them to admit they were feeling jealous. You’re lucky you aren’t licensed yet or I’ll be filing to have it revoked.”

Yoongi’s hand stills around Jeongguk’s. His hair shakes as he looks up at Jeongguk with wide eyes. “Were you? Jealous?” He ignores everything else Jeongguk said and Jeongguk doesn’t know if he’s relieved for it or embarrassed.

“You tell me, doc,” Jeongguk shrugs as Yoongi finishes putting bandaids over his wounds, his thumb gently caressing bruised knuckles. “Is there any other way to call feeling like it should’ve been my shirt you were wearing when you walked out of your bedroom and into the arms of a dickhead?”

And it’s easy for Jeongguk to say this because it’s true. It’s a feeling he’s been letting fester deep inside of him for days now and airing it out like this was nothing if not something that made Jeongguk breathe a little easier than he has lately.

For a moment, Yoongi says nothing, only blinks at Jeongguk slowly as if needing a moment to take it all in. Jeongguk’s heart pounds, no more pitter-patter, just plain old banging against his chest and threatening to break through.

But Yoongi laughs and instantly, the room feels like it’s brighter. Jeongguk relaxes as he watches Yoongi’s shoulders rise with his laughter. He doesn’t know how he hadn’t noticed how adorable this habit of Yoongi’s is before but he’s sure he’ll never forget it now. 

“I’ve worn your shirts too many times you started complaining, now you want me to start wearing them again?” Yoongi turns to pack up the first aid kit but Jeongguk holds him down by the knee, silently telling him to stay. 

“Yes,” Jeongguk swallows thickly, “I want that. But…” Jeongguk suddenly finds it difficult to continue. He’s tongue-tied and his heart is inching up his arm, making its way into his palms. When he looks down, Yoongi’s reaching for his hand, thumb digging into the middle of Jeongguk’s palm and yet the touch is gentle. 

With a shaky breath, Jeongguk continues, hoping Yoongi will be as gentle with his heart as he is with his hands. “But, hyung, I also want more.”

“More?” Yoongi repeats.

“I want to be your more.” Jeongguk clarifies. “I’m sorry if I’m just springing this on you right now, but believe me, this all happened very fast for me too.” Jeongguk rambles, apparently having a mouth that runs as fast as his heart beats—much too fast for his brain to keep up with. “It seems my Yoongi hyung-related epiphanies have a deadline and somehow I feel like this epiphany’s deadline is today and that if I don’t do anything, I’ll never be able to—fate, being the meanie that she is, probably won’t let me.”

Yoongi can’t help but laugh at Jeongguk’s outburst, doesn’t mind the way his face heats up at the implications of Jeongguk’s words. “Baby, slow down,” the word suddenly feels heavy on his tongue but the blush spreading across Jeongguk’s cheeks makes him think the weight’s not a problem at all. Still, implications are never enough, especially not for situations arising from epiphanies as Jeongguk had called it. “What do you mean?”

“I mean that,” Jeongguk flails a hand in between them, pointing at Yoongi with stiff fingers. “You calling me baby—I want that but I want you to mean it.” He takes a deep breath before meeting Yoongi’s eyes. For a second he falters, gets caught up in how Yoongi’s looking back at him just as intensely. “I like you, Yoongi hyung. And it took me awhile to get here but I did, and I’m not letting myself waste another second.”

At the back of Jeongguk’s head, he can hear the warning bells. He’s back at the boxing ring, cornered with both fists raised in front of his face. He feels the constant pressing against his hands never leaving. He knows it’s Yoongi holding him but he also knows that only one blow from the older would have the referee counting up to ten, ready to call for a knock out. 

Jeongguk braces himself as he sees Yoongi’s dazed expression, his mouth falling open before closing and opening again. It must be a lot to take in, Jeongguk knows more than anyone, but when Yoongi finally lets his mouth remain open, words slipping through his teeth, Jeongguk is more confused than anything. 

“I didn’t want to lose any weight.” Yoongi starts, eyes distant and avoiding Jeongguk’s. “I didn’t want to work out either, that’s always been your department. But I did want to get laid, I really did.”

“Hyung,” Jeongguk interjects, shuffling uncomfortably in his seat. Was Yoongi really going to ignore his confession to talk about how horny he was? “Did you hear me? I said I like you. I’d rather you reject me straight up than talk about someone else’s dick.” Jeongguk knows he’s pouting by the end of it, his voice sounding small and whiny. 

Yoongi chuckles at him before shaking his head. “I know what you said, Jeongguk-ah, and I’m not talking about someone else’s dick. Well, not anyone’s that isn’t in here.”

“I don’t think I’m following, hyung.”

“Because you didn’t let hyung finish.” Yoongi’s voice is soft, his hands even softer when he lets go of Jeongguk’s in favor of holding him by the cheek. Jeongguk instinctively sinks into his touch, eyes fluttering shut with a smile before Yoongi’s speaking again. “I liked you long before you liked me, baby. I said everything I said that day to try and get you to sleep with me.”

The admission has Jeongguk’s eyes snapping open. He jerks back from Yoongi’s touch, the hand still held by Yoongi shifts until Jeongguk’s fingers are circling delicate wrists. “What?”

Yoongi rubs at his neck, bringing Jeongguk’s attention to the now rapidly reddening skin. “It wasn’t my best moment, I’ll admit that, not to mention I could’ve worded it all out to be a bit more obvious. But I was stupid and I’ve liked you for years, Jeongguk-ah.” Yoongi takes a deep breath before finally, finally, meeting Jeongguk’s eyes again. It’s warm, gaze tender as he looks Jeongguk over and worries his lip. “At that point, I was willing to have anything from you even if it meant not having you at all—at least not completely.”

“Oh, hyung,” Jeongguk is barely able to say. He hadn’t realized how much Yoongi had been hurting. In all honesty, he probably never will, not when he already thought the past few days of his life had been one of the worst period of his life. And now, Yoongi was telling him that he’s been feeling that for years and still said nothing? 

Jeongguk feels like an asshole. For not noticing. For not realizing sooner. He feels like the biggest asshole for letting Yoongi ever feel like Jeongguk wouldn’t give him all of him—as if he wouldn’t give Yoongi anything he asked for. 

But Yoongi didn’t ask. And Jeongguk couldn’t blame him for that at all. He probably wouldn’t have done anything even now if not for what he overheard at the locker room. 

All he can do is hold Yoongi, tug him close until he’s crashing into Jeongguk with an oof. 

“I’m sorry I took so long, hyung, but you have me now. I’ll make it up to you.” Jeongguk says into Yoongi’s hair, his hands overlapping across Yoongi back. He’s worried words aren’t enough— knows they aren’t—but right now it’s all he has. “I’m sorry this is all I have to say.”

Yoongi untangles their limbs slowly. His hands find their way to Jeongguk’s shoulders, squeezing them softly before reaching up to brush the stray strands of hair that’s in the way of Jeongguk’s eyes. Yoongi focuses on the movement and Jeongguk watches as Yoongi goes back to avoiding his gaze. 

“Don’t apologize,” Yoongi’s still intent on fixing Jeongguk’s hair. “Just kiss me instead.”

Jeongguk blinks dumbly long enough for Yoongi to look him in the eye again. He’s not sure he heard right, almost asks Yoongi to repeat himself just in case, but he sees Yoongi’s ears and how pink they are. 

Chuckling to himself, Jeongguk feels his heart pound at how much of walking contradiction his hyung is. He could so easily shove some random guy’s dick into Jeongguk’s face or tell him that this all started because he wanted Jeongguk to sleep with him, but asking for a kiss? That’s what turns him shy and embarrassed—Jeongguk likes him a lot.  

“You’re so cute, hyung,” He says as he curls his hand over Yoongi’s nape, giving it a light tug to bring them closer—no more than a finger of space between them. Like this, Yoongi’s looking up at Jeongguk, but his eyes flutter shut before Jeongguk can comprehend the vulnerability in them. Breathing in, Jeongguk leans forward, his breath ghosting against Yoongi’s lips as he says, “I like you so much, baby.” 

All Yoongi can do is hum appreciatively before Jeongguk’s closing the distance between them.

The first thing Jeongguk feels as Yoongi’s lips move against his is the burst of adrenaline pumping through his veins. He feels likes he’s on top of the world, like nothing could keep him still—keep him from kissing Yoongi like Yoongi deserved. 

Yoongi’s hand on Jeongguk’s hair slides down until he’s holding him by the jaw. The slide of their lips is soft, gentle—the same way Yoongi tended to Jeongguk’s wounds, the same way Yoongi’s always taken care of Jeongguk. 

It only hits Jeongguk that much more, when Yoongi whines into his mouth, how oblivious he’s been to Yoongi’s feelings. 

Because Yoongi’s always loved him the way he’s kissing him now, careful and giving. Each touch, each moan, every press of their lips—it’s all just another way of Yoongi giving Jeongguk the love he’s been keeping to himself in the silence. 

But this time, they’re allowed to be loud. Jeongguk’s allowed to give as much of himself to Yoongi as he wants. And what Jeongguk wants is for Yoongi to have what he deserves—everything. 

“God,” Jeongguk breathes out as they break apart for air. “I can’t believe I passed up on being able to do that for years.”

Yoongi laughs, his neck as red as his face. “I can’t believe this is happening.”

“You better believe it, hyung,” Jeongguk grins boyishly and Yoongi thinks his heart’s loud enough to be heard. “I’m never letting a day pass by without me doing that again. I think I like you too much. And these lips,” Jeongguk runs his thumb across Yoongi’s bottom lip, watching as it bounces as soon as he lets go. “They’re just begging to be kissed.”

Yoongi smiles and his pink lips turn a perfect shade of red as he takes them between his teeth. Jeongguk’s transfixed by the sight of it, hands idly rubbing up and down Yoongi’s waist as he watches his lips move when he talks. “Baby, I’ve been begging for more.”

The shift in Yoongi’s tone is sudden, leaving Jeongguk no time to react before Yoongi’s pulling him in for more. Unlike the first time, this kiss is a lot more full of intent, no longer careful nor  warm. It’s hot. 

It’s hot when Yoongi’s hand squeezes at Jeongguk’s bicep, something Jeongguk indulges by flexing even more. It’s hot when Jeongguk licks at Yoongi’s lip, asking for permission before Yoongi’s moaning at the feeling of Jeongguk’s tongue against his. It’s hot when Yoongi reaches for the hair by Jeongguk’s nape, pulling him off his lips to trail wet kisses against his neck. 

It’s hot all over and Jeongguk feels his head spin and his cock stir. He thinks it’s altogether too much and yet not enough, and Yoongi seems to feel the same way—putting just enough distance between them for him to be able to swing his leg over Jeongguk’s thighs, straddling him and sitting on his lap.

Pulling away, Jeongguk’s hands instinctively hold onto Yoongi’s legs. “W-wait,” He stutters, struggling to catch his breath as Yoongi begins kissing across his collarbone. “Hyung,” Jeongguk tries again but Yoongi only hums across his skin, drawing out a shiver down Jeongguk’s spine. “Fuck—Yoongi hyung, you’re gonna have to let me shower before we go any further.”

Yoongi sits back at that, an amused grin stretched across his face. He reaches for Jeongguk’s shoulders, fingers lingering where the fabric of Jeongguk’s muscle tee ends and where his tattoos begin. “But why?” Jeongguk swallows thickly at the neediness of Yoongi’s voice. He can’t believe this is the same man that couldn’t even look him in the eye to ask for a kiss. “Don’t you think you’ve already made me wait to long for you to finally fuck me?”

The bluntness of Yoongi’s words mixed with his heady gaze falling directly on Jeongguk’s has his cock twitching in his gym shorts. He falls forward with a groan, his head resting on Yoongi’s shoulder to which the older responds to by running his hands through the ends of Jeongguk’s hair. 

“Is this what being with you’s gonna be like?” Jeongguk asks as he squeezes at Yoongi’s waist, stopping his hips from getting even closer to his already stiffening erection. “Because if it is, I think you’re gonna end up killing me, hyung.” 

“Well,” Yoongi stops moving against Jeongguk. He smiles before diving in to leave a small kiss on the corner of Jeongguk’s lips. “We don’t want that, now, do we?”

The light peck has Jeongguk chasing after Yoongi’s lips but Yoongi’s quick to get away, giggling as he does so. “Look who’s impatient now.” He places his hands against Jeongguk’s chest, fingers digging in lightly before pushing against him to help get back on his feet. Jeongguk pouts once Yoongi walks away from him, his head torn between wanting to pull Yoongi back onto his lap and getting up to head to the shower. 

As if reading his mind, Yoongi chooses for him when he makes his way to his bedroom, not sparing Jeongguk another glance as he calls out, “You better hurry, baby. I’ve gotten used to not being fucked by you, I could deal with it myself for another night if you take too long.”

Jeongguk’s up and running by the time Yoongi closes the door to his bedroom. 

In record time, Jeongguk steps out of the shower, deciding against changing into clothes in favor of simply wrapping a towel around his waist. Usually, it takes Jeongguk an hour to wash the grime off his skin on gym days, but Yoongi’s touches had been scalding—even more than the water streaming down his body—and Jeongguk didn’t want to take any longer than he had to. 

By all means, Jeongguk wasn’t one to feel excited for sex. If anything, he was quite indifferent to it, never really kept track of when the last time was and definitely didn’t actively seek out the next. But something about Yoongi, about the confessions that slipped off their lips so easily, had Jeongguk wanting all of him. He wanted to taste Yoongi on his tongue, sweet and hot. He wanted to touch Yoongi, soft but demanding of his attention. 

He just wanted Yoongi.

Stepping out of the bathroom, Jeongguk nearly jumps in place when Yoongi pops his head out from where he’s leaning against the wall beside the door.

“Jesus, hyung,” Jeongguk presses a hand over his heart, his shock overcoming the nerves that were slowly making themselves known. “I could’ve just come to your room.”

“And miss this?” Yoongi asks with his eyes focused below Jeongguk’s face. He’s only wearing sweatpants now, low enough on his hips to let Jeongguk know that he isn’t wearing anything underneath. Jeongguk’s throat feels dry at the sight of him. Hair falls over Yoongi’s eyebrows as he shakes his head slowly, eye contact not breaking with Jeongguk’s bare torso as he rakes his eyes over him up and down appreciatively. “No way.”

“Yah, Yoongi hyung,” Jeongguk reaches forward to rest his hands on Yoongi’s waist, his bare skin warm to the touch. The movement has Jeongguk’s muscles shifting and he sees the way Yoongi doesn’t miss it. With a low voice, he whispers by Yoongi’s ear. “You only want me for my body, don’t you?”

“Leave me alone. I’m free to do this now,” Yoongi huffs as he runs his hands up Jeongguk’s forearms, squeezing lightly at his biceps. Jeongguk’s starting to think Yoongi’s got a thing for his muscles and takes mental note of it. “I have the right to,” he says as he moves his hands to Jeongguk’s chest, fingers grazing against Jeongguk’s nipple. “Only me.”

Hot and has a possessive streak just like he does? Jeongguk’s beginning to think Yoongi was made for him. 

“Yeah?” Jeongguk breathes out shakily, taking the shell of Yoongi’s ear and giving it a light tug with his teeth. “Show me just how much I’m yours then.”

Just as easily as it was for Jeongguk to let his lips fall against Yoongi’s neck, Yoongi tugs at him by the nape to bring him crashing onto his lips. 

The first slide of their mouths together has Jeongguk feeling like he’s being engulfed in flames. His hands are running up and down Yoongi’s back, inching closer and closer to the waistband of his sweats. He feels heat pool low in his stomach as he bites on Yoongi’s bottom lip and tugs, breathing out a deep mine as he does so. Yoongi didn’t have to show Jeongguk anything for him to know he’s Yoongi’s, he’s already got him wrapped around his fingers as it is.

Jeongguk didn’t mind though, after all, they were beautiful fingers to be wrapped around—even more beautiful when they brushed against the end of Jeongguk’s towel, playfully pulling at it. “Fuck,” Yoongi groans into Jeongguk’s mouth, his breath hot against Jeongguk. “Baby, you’re so fucking hot,” he mumbles before pressing open mouthed kisses down Jeongguk’s neck, trailing even further away until he’s kissing at the curve of his shoulder. “Bet these arms of yours could pick me up and fuck me against the wall.”

At that, Jeongguk’s hands tighten on the cinch of Yoongi’s waist, drawing out a gasp from the older. “Is that what you want?” He groans with his head tipped back, hands curling and uncurling by the small of Yoongi’s back. As if sensing his attempt to hold back, Yoongi reaches for his arm, circles his wrists delicately and pulls until Jeongguk’s hands are flat against the swell of his ass. 

Instinctively, Jeongguk presses down, his fingers forming indents where it sinks into Yoongi’s skin. The action has Yoongi moaning, pressing forward just enough for Jeongguk to feel Yoongi’s erection against his hip. 

In one swift motion, Jeongguk bends at the knees, his hands trailing further down and grabbing hold of the back of Yoongi’s thighs. Without so much as a warning, Jeongguk lifts him up and locks Yoongi’s knees behind his back before pressing him against the wall. 

The high-pitched sound it draws out of Yoongi has Jeongguk smirking up at him, his hands firm on Yoongi’s thighs. “Hi, baby,” he whispers, breath fanning against Yoongi’s jaw. The full-body shiver that runs through him is so apparent, his hold tightening from where his hands are wrapped around Jeongguk’s neck. 

Wide, blown out pupils are what greets Jeongguk the moment he raises his head. Yoongi looks just as eager as Jeongguk feels and if that isn’t enough to let Jeongguk know how much Yoongi wants this, the erection pressing against his hip sure is. 

The image has Jeongguk licking his lips in anticipation, drawing Yoongi’s attention to his mouth and forcing out a groan past his lips. “Come here,” is all Yoongi says before Jeongguk’s being overcome with the taste of Yoongi on his lips.

He can taste coffee and vanilla cake on Yoongi, even more when he parts his lips and lets Jeongguk’s tongue slide against his. It’s unexplainable, the way Jeongguk can’t get enough of it—the way he only wants more the more he gets. And with Yoongi panting into his mouth, hips grinding into Jeongguk’s hips, desperate to get any friction against his cock, Jeongguk can’t help but take what he’s allowed. 

Shifting his hands from where he’s holding Yoongi is easy, one hand going under Yoongi’s ass, holding him up from the other side where his thighs meet his hips while the other reaches up to smooth over the apples of Yoongi’s cheeks. Reluctantly, Jeongguk stops kissing Yoongi, taking the time to spit into his free hand. 

Yoongi whines at the sight of Jeongguk doing something so lewd, and even with him already knowing what’s about to happen, he still gasps into Jeongguk’s neck the moment Jeongguk slides a hand under his waistband, hand wrapping firmly around Yoongi’s cock. 

“Fuck,” Jeongguk groans as he feels precome coat his hand. “You’re already dripping and we’re just getting started.”

“You mean—fuck,” Yoongi falters when Jeongguk twists up, hand tightening right under the head of Yoongi’s cock, “You’re just getting started. I’ve been edging myself since you showered.”

Chuckling, dry and humorless, Jeongguk speeds up the motions of his hand, “You must want to come so badly, don’t you?” He looks down at where he’s jerking Yoongi off, underneath his grey sweatpants, right where a wet patch has begun growing with every jerk. Yoongi nods as he buries his face into Jeongguk’s neck, legs pulling Jeongguk closer to him until they’re flushed chest to chest. “Come on, hyung, come for me and maybe I’ll fuck you against the wall like you asked.”

Nails dig into Jeongguk’s shoulders once he starts biting at Yoongi’s neck, sucking bruising marks onto his skin, his hand still not faltering. He’s drowned with the sound of Yoongi’s ah ah ah’s , each syllable heading straight for his groin. Jeongguk can feel a tightening in his own core, his cock so hard it’s pressed against the fabric of his towel. His only reprieve is when Yoongi thrusts his hips into Jeongguk’s hand, desperately fucking up into the fist as he chases for release. 

“I’m close,” Yoongi whines, his head falling back and hitting the wall. He doesn’t seem to care about that, however, only cares about the feeling of Jeongguk’s hand around him, about Jeongguk’s lips on his chest, his tongue circling a nipple and taking it between his teeth lightly. 

It’s all it takes for Yoongi to finally snap—his vision turning into a blinding white as he bites down onto his bottom lip, hard enough to draw blood. He spills over Jeongguk’s hand and the younger simply works him through his orgasm, not minding how soiled Yoongi’s sweatpants are.

After a few more pumps, Jeongguk notices Yoongi jerk his hips away from Jeongguk’s hand. Carefully, not wanting to create an even bigger mess, Jeongguk takes his hand out from Yoongi’s sweatpants. Without taking his eyes away from Yoongi, not even sure if his hyung is already back into reality, he wraps his lips around his index finger, licking it clean before adding another, and another, until his hand’s free of Yoongi’s come. 

Hazily, Yoongi smiles at Jeongguk, his hands leaving the younger’s shoulders to wipe at the corner of his mouth, catching some of his come. Jeongguk’s eyes are steady on Yoongi as he watches the older taste himself, humming pleasantly before his lips pull into an even wider smile. 

Jeongguk’s cock twitches at the sight of him, his mind clouding with just one thought: mine, mine, mine. 

“You make want me want to throw you around when you look at me like that, hyung.”

Yoongi laughs before he reaches between them. His hands holding onto Jeongguk’s towel and giving it a light tug, the fabric to landing on the floor with a wet thud. Throwing his head to the side, Yoongi licks his lips, dazed eyes focusing only on Jeongguk’s cock, red and swollen at the tip as it curves towards his stomach. “Then do it, big boy.”

Like a switch, something flickers inside Jeongguk at Yoongi’s challenging tone. His hands slide out from under Yoongi, holding onto his thighs with both hands before hoisting him up his waist. His lips are back on Yoongi’s, hungry and driven by the need to please. He staggers backwards, Yoongi chuckling into his lips when they crash into the doorframe. 

“Stop kissing me and open the door before you break something,” Yoongi giggles, his cheeks coated in pink and Jeongguk’s wants nothing more than to nip at it. Instead, he reaches to his side, twisting the doorknob and turning on the lights once they cross the threshold. He wants to see Yoongi fall apart on him, wants to see just how much prettier Yoongi can get. 

Without a warning, Jeongguk tosses Yoongi onto the bed, causing him to yelp, the blush on cheeks reddening further and spreading down his chest.

For a minute, Jeongguk stands at the foot of his bed, ignoring the way Yoongi’s calling for him. He hasn’t wanted anything this much in his life which surprises Jeongguk with just how greedy he already is about Yoongi. 

He likes the way he’s the only one that gets to see Yoongi this way from now on—Yoongi with his hand playing with his nipple, eyes sharp and heavy under thick eyelashes. Yoongi with bruises littered against his skin, blossoming in shades of red and purple. Yoongi with his lips parted, his voice raspy as it’s pulled out of him with every stroke along his cock over his sweats. 

Yoongi with Jeongguk’s name rolling off his lips, asking—begging—for Jeongguk to take him and make him his. 

“God, you’re so pretty, hyung,” Jeongguk whispers into the room. His knees sink into his mattress as he makes his way to Yoongi, his body covering his. Like this, he realizes just how small Yoongi is compared to him. He’s got broader shoulders than Jeongguk but everything else about him is small, save for his cock. 

Sweeter than any of the kisses they’ve shared after the first one, Jeongguk kisses Yoongi. It’s close-lipped and gentle, not a show of claiming—just another I like you said without words. 

“You’re perfect, baby,” Jeongguk says after they break apart, his forehead resting against Yoongi’s. “I can’t believe it took me this long.”

Under him, Yoongi shakes his head, hand cupping Jeongguk’s cheeks. “You’re here, that’s all that matters. Now,” he hikes his leg over Jeongguk’s waist, pulling him down and turning their positions around with ease, knocking the wind out of Jeongguk’s lungs as he sits over his cock. “Fuck me.”

Jeongguk slides his hands up Yoongi’s sides as he smiles up at him in awe. He didn’t expect Yoongi to do that, he expected even less the way his cock jumped at the sudden show of dominance. But he decides to table it for another time, tonight’s about making Yoongi feel good and by taking care of him. 

“You don’t think I’m letting you do that just like that, are you?” Jeongguk squeezes at Yoongi’s ass before sitting up and thrusting up into where his cock’s positioned between Yoongi’s cheeks. Even through the fabric, Yoongi feels just how good Jeongguk would feel like—how full he’d make him feel. It makes him get on his knees, hurriedly pulling his sweatpants off and throwing them to the side.

With wonder in his eyes, Jeongguk rubs his hands over Yoongi’s now bare thighs, gaze focused on where’s Yoongi’s hard, bright pink and dripping down himself. He feels drool form in his mouth, Yoongi looking good enough to eat in front of him. So he does what his heart (and dick) tells him to, he sticks his tongue out to taste, Yoongi’s hands immediately falling onto Jeongguk’s shoulders with a moan. 

Spurred on by Yoongi’s obvious pleasure, Jeongguk takes the head of his cock into his mouth. He swirls his tongue on the underside, licking lightly at the tip when he pulls his head back enough to reach. Yoongi groans and his nails dig so hard into Jeongguk’s shoulder he’s sure they’re going to leave marks. 

“If you keep doing that, I’ll be too sensitive to take you and I swear on your fucking protein shakes that I will never forgive you if you don’t fuck me tonight.” Yoongi hisses, eyes narrowing as Jeongguk pulls off off him and chuckles at Yoongi’s antics. 

“So impatient,” Jeongguk teases. He nips at Yoongi’s cheeks, unable to resist any longer before pushing Yoongi back onto the bed. He smirks at the way Yoongi gasps, his hands reaching for Yoongi’s cock.

“Is this what you want?” Jeongguk tugs at Yoongi once, twice, before letting his hand fall further down. His index finger catching against Yoongi’s rim and is surprised to feel lube dripping out of his hole. In question, Jeongguk looks back up at Yoongi. He only flushes in response, mumbling out that he fingered himself when Jeongguk was in the bathroom. 

Jeongguk remembers Yoongi telling him he edged himself, but he didn’t think it would be in this way. If he had known, he would’ve fucked Yoongi against the wall right there and then. But, he supposes, he’d rather have Yoongi on a bed for the first time.

His finger is met with no resistance when he pushes in, easily replacing one with two as Yoongi’s moans get louder. “Jeongguk-ah, please,” he begs, “I’m ready.”

Curling his fingers up, Jeongguk finds the spot he was looking for, not really fingering Yoongi to open him up but to know where Yoongi needs it the most. The shout Yoongi lets out had Jeongguk smiling at him widely, pulling his fingers out with Yoongi still panting. “Let me just get a condom, hyung.”

Yoongi narrows his eyes at Jeongguk, kicking him lightly with his foot as he grumbles, “You’re a fucking ass.”

“No,” Jeongguk chuckles before ripping the foil packet open with his teeth. He rolls it on over himself and groans at the touch, suddenly reminded of the lack of attention all this time. Slathering lube generously onto his hand and his cock, he comes closer to Yoongi, nudging his legs apart as he situates himself between them. Pressing the tip to Yoongi’s hole and feeling it flutter against him, he smirks, “I’m fucking your ass.”

“Is it too late to take it all ba—ah—“ Yoongi’s words are cut into a moan when Jeongguk thrusts into him. He’s big—wide—and Yoongi feels his jaw go slack. 

“Hyung,” Jeongguk groans as he pushes in, little by little. “You’re so tight around me, feels so good.” His movements are shallow, careful not to hurt Yoongi, but something makes him stop. “Are you okay?” He asks, conscious of the way Yoongi has his eyes squeezed shut.

“Y-yeah,” he stutters, words slurring. “Like it when it hurts—fuck—Jeongguk-ah, keep going. Give hyung more.”

Assured he isn’t hurting Yoongi, Jeongguk pushes in. He watches as Yoongi’s hole swallows him in, his hands shake at how good it feels, at how warm Yoongi’s walls feel around him. He groans the moment he’s all the way in, whining high when Yoongi clenches around him.

Jeongguk’s hands grip onto Yoongi’s hips as he fucks into him, hips rabbiting, the sound of skin on skin bouncing against the walls. 

Without a word, Jeongguk’s hand curls around Yoongi’s thigh, pushing it up until Yoongi’s ankle is resting over Jeongguk’s shoulder. The stretch of his limb has a burn running over Yoongi’s skin, but he likes it, feels his cock twitch at the sudden pain. His hands have the sheets balled into his fists, the new angle has Jeongguk thrusting into him easier, jostling Yoongi up the bed with every move. It’s blinding to Yoongi, the pleasure he feels, and he says as much, moaning as he turns his head to the side. 

Jeongguk feels sweat drip down his hair, the coil in his core tightening with every push into Yoongi. With his free hand, he reaches up for Yoongi’s nipple, rolling it between his finger and dragging out a whine from Yoongi’s lips. He twists and pinches, not once faltering in how he fucks Yoongi. 

Completely caught up in making Yoongi feel good, in drawing out his second orgasm, Jeongguk doesn’t notice the way his bed headboard is hitting against the wall until it knocks down one of the framed artworks he’s got posted. Stilling, his hips flush against Yoongi, he twists to look back, noticing that the middle artwork was no longer up. 

Leaning back on his elbows, Yoongi looks up, his lips shaky in an attempt to hold a smile in. “Did we just?”

Jeongguk nods as he turns around to face Yoongi, laughter bubbling out from his chest. “I think we did.”

“Fuck,” Yoongi says, laughing into his hand. He brings his leg down from jeongguk’s shoulder, the stretch in his hamstring suddenly too much. “What’ll the neighbors think?”

“Who cares what they think?” Jeongguk says as he leaves a kiss on Yoongi’s nose, cock still buried deep in him. The movement pushes Jeongguk further into Yoongi, pleasure shooting back up to his core. “Let’s just give them something better to think about.”

With ease, Jeongguk picks Yoongi up, legs wrapping around his waist to catch himself from falling. Each step Jeongguk takes away from the bed has his cock reaching deeper inside Yoongi, his hyung’s precome sticky between their stomachs. 

“Isn’t this what you wanted?” Jeongguk says into Yoongi’s mouth the moment his back is pressed against the opposite wall, no framed artworks in sight. Jeongguk thrusts up experimentally and Yoongi nearly yells from how good it feels. 

From this angle, Jeongguk knows he’s hitting Yoongi’s prostate head on, each thrust a direct pull at Yoongi’s core. 

Jeongguk’s close, undeniably so. Yoongi’s feels too good, feels like too much, but the way he’s calling out Jeongguk’s name like a prayer has him holding off. 

“Jeongguk-ah—ah—baby, fuck,” Yoongi moans, unable to form full sentences. “Close, S-so close.”

Jeongguk leans forward, wanting to kiss Yoongi as they approach their climax. He doesn’t mind the way it’s messy, spit going everywhere with how Yoongi’s unable to keep his mouth closed long enough to kiss back. Holding Yoongi up with just a hand around his waist, Jeongguk reaches for Yoongi’s cock, a yell ripping out of Yoongi at the contact.

Matching his thrusts with the jerk of his hand on Yoongi, Jeongguk speeds up, chasing after his own pleasure. 

“Come with me, hyung,” he groans into Yoongi’s mouth, their kiss just a mash of lips and teeth. “Come on.”

Jeongguk tugs at Yoongi’s cock with intent, tightening on the upstroke before he feels Yoongi trembling in his arms. Digging his thumb into the slit, Yoongi moans, clenching around Jeongguk so tight it drives him off the edge just as Yoongi spills into his hand and over their chests.

With a shout, Jeongguk falls forward, hips still moving against Yoongi as he milks his own orgasm, his hand just as relentless on Yoongi’s slowly softening cock. 

“Fuck,” Yoongi slumps backward, his head banging against the wall for the second time that night. He lightly pushes at Jeongguk’s hand, oversensitivity getting to him. “You—I knew you’d ruin sex for me forever.”

“Uh, thanks?” Jeongguk chuckles. He holds onto Yoongi firmer, ignoring the way his arms feel like they’re about to fall off. He really shouldn’t have done this on the day he boxed for four hours. Slowly, he walks back to his bed, his cock already soft inside Yoongi. “I’m gonna put you down now, okay?”

Nodding, Yoongi loosens his hold on Jeongguk, his back hitting against the mattress softly. He winces when Jeongguk’s pulls out, but says nothing about it. He only leans back on his elbows and watches as Jeongguk slips out of the condom and ties it. 

“I’ll be right back, hyung,” Jeongguk says before leaving the room. He comes back in boxers and with a wet towel to clean Yoongi’s come off off him. He’s gentle as he does it, even more when he’s wiping down Yoongi’s cock. When he’s done, he takes some boxers out of his dresser and lets Yoongi slip onto them. Once he’s clothed, Jeongguk climbs over him, his touch careful as he pushes the hair put of Yoongi’s face before pressing a kiss to his forehead. 

“You’re such a romantic, Jeongguk-ah,” Yoongi laughs, pulling Jeongguk down until they’re laid side by side. He wraps his hands around Jeongguk’s arm, cuddling into him and laying his head over his chest. “You act like you didn’t just fuck me within an inch of my life.”

“Hyung,” Jeongguk whines, his cheeks heating up instantly. “Shut up.”

Yoongi’s shoulder move against Jeongguk’s ribs as he laughs, “Alright, alright.”

It’s quiet after that, just the sound of their breathing and the low whir of the air conditioner can be heard. Jeongguk’s fingers are running through Yoongi’s hair as he looks back on how exactly he got here. 

He was oblivious. Then he was jealous. And then he was angry. 

Remembering everything Eunho said, he still feels angry.

“Hey, hyung?” Jeongguk asks, quiet enough that if Yoongi were already asleep, he wouldn’t be waken. 

“Hmm?”

“I’m sorry about Eunho.”

Jeongguk wishes he never took his number that day. He wishes he never let someone as shitty as him get close to Yoongi. 

Shaking his head, Yoongi looks up at Jeongguk. “You didn’t do anything wrong. It’s his fault—he’s just another guy who can’t take rejection.”

“Rejection?”

“Yeah,” Yoongi nods slowly, speaks even slower. “He wanted to sleep with me after you left earlier because apparently after I tripped and fell last night, I fell asleep the moment we got home. But I didn’t want to, I only ever wanted to sleep with you and seeing you this morning—the way you looked at him with your cute little umbrella in hand—I just couldn’t pretend like I wanted anything else.”

‘You fell?” Jeongguk stiffens under Yoongi, suddenly worried. “Is that how you got your bruises?”

“What?” He asks. “Did you think Eunho gave them to me?”

“No,” Jeongguk huffs, avoiding Yoongi’s gaze even when he chuckles and coos at how cute Jeongguk is when he’s jealous. Eager to change the subject, Jeongguk focuses on something else that Yoongi said. “You said you didn’t want to sleep with anyone other than me, but remote dick?”

This time, Yoongi full on laughs, as if what Jeongguk just said was a joke he’s been keeping to himself. “Remote dick isn’t real. Well,” Yoongi tilts his head to the side. “I guess he is but I didn’t fuck him.”

“What?” Jeongguk’s never been more confused in his life. “But the picture, and the condom, and the stories…” 

“All fake,” Yoongi pats at Jeongguk’s chest. “My friend Hoseok gave me a dick pic, was very willing to, actually. Everything else was just planted, he thought if we could make you jealous maybe you’d realize you wanted me the same way I wanted you.”

“What the fuck?” Jeongguk asks incredulously, amusement clear in his voice. “You’re insane, but God, maybe I’m even more insane because even after that, I don’t think I like you any less.”

“As you shouldn’t,” Yoongi huffs. “I’ve been doing all the work all these years. It’s time you pull your weight.”

“Alright, alright,” Jeongguk tugs Yoongi closer, wrapping his arms around him and throwing a leg over his. He kisses the crown of Yoongi’s head loudly as he says, “What does my baby want me to do?”

Yoongi nuzzles his nose into the crook of Jeongguk’s shoulder before inhaling. His hands warm over the younger’s chest. Jeongguk feels Yoongi’s smile on his skin as he replies.

“You don’t have to do anything, just tell me you like me again.” Jeongguk’s heart swells. The request so simple it tugs at his heartstrings. “It’s nice to finally hear it after convincing myself I never will.”

“I like you, Yoongi hyung.” Jeongguk says with as much sincerity as he can. “I’ll let my voice go hoarse and tell you everyday if I have to.”

“You don’t.”

Jeongguk smiles and brings his head down just to kiss Yoongi on the nose. “I’ll do it anyway. I like you a lot.”

Yoongi hums as his breathing evens out, “I like you too, Jeongguk-ah. I like you more.”

Jeongguk doesn’t disagree, knows his hyung’s liked him for longer but as he plays with his hair, watching as Yoongi’s eyes flutter shut, he doesn’t think it’ll be true for long. 

—

Jeongguk wakes up to his arms being stiff. 

It wasn’t anything new to Jeongguk, the tingly feeling once he moves his limbs as soon as he wakes up. What’s new, however, is the weight on top of it. What’s new is the fact that his arms aren’t dead or sore from working out too hard the day before—it’s dead from sleeping with Yoongi in his arms, his hyung resting his back against Jeongguk’s bicep. Slowly, he presses a kiss onto Yoongi’s hair, careful not to wake him. 

The past week has been spent in pure bliss. 

After the high of sex calmed down and the pair was sat across each other over their kitchen counter the next morning, Yoongi explained everything he glossed over before they drifted off to sleep. 

It was still a lot for Jeongguk to wrap his head around but at the end of the day, as he sat on the couch with Yoongi sprawled over his lap, he didn’t really mind the finer details. 

Nothing much between them changed after they exchanged their I-like-you’s. They were still best friends more than they were not-friends-but-not-boyfriends which meant they still laid around doing nothing, or fought over sneakers not put on shoe racks, or laughed so much they were gasping for air. 

Nothing changed except there were kisses—lots of it. In the morning before they even had time to brush their teeth. At ten in the morning, when Jeongguk would leave for the gym or at two in the afternoon for when he would return. In the middle of the night as they scarred their neighbors, screaming each other’s names loud enough that if they were to see the other tenants of their floor, they’d never need to introduce themselves. 

Nothing changed except—

“Say that again, hyung.” Jeongguk asks. “Say it again but slowly so that you can hear what you’re saying the way I’m hearing it.”

Yoongi rolls his eyes at Jeongguk’s antics. He turns around from where he’s seated in the couch to face the younger as he says, “Do you want to workout with me?”

It was the middle of the day and Jeongguk had just arrived home from the gym. He felt boneless and tired, and frankly, he thinks he’s gone just a little bit delirious because there’s no way on earth Yoongi just asked him that. 

But he is, and Jeongguk gets reminded of how gone he is for Yoongi when he finds himself nodding yes despite every fibre in his body yelling no. 

“I’ll go get ready,” Yoongi says before walking to his room. He eyes Jeongguk up and down, “You should probably get out of those clothes too.”

It doesn’t take Jeongguk that long to change and get ready, his gym bag still having everything he needs, but ten minutes pass by and Yoongi’s still not out of his bedroom. A little worried something might have happened to Yoongi in the short time he was alone, Jeongguk heads for Yoongi’s bedroom.

“Hyung,” Jeongguk reaches for the doorknob, twisting it open without so much as a knock. “What’s taking you so— oh. ”

“You look too dressed to be working out with me,” Yoongi smiles and Jeongguk doesn’t know if the beating of his heart is still from the way he had reached his maximum heart rate at the gym or from the way his dick is stirring awake at the sight of his hyung laying naked on his bed. He giggles at the way Jeongguk’s standing awestruck and the sound is much too innocent for the way his hand is stroking languidly up and down his cock. “I think you should do something about that.”

Fuck the gym, Jeongguk thinks as he begins toeing his shoes off. Yoongi hyung’s method of working out is definitely the better one.