Chapter Text
After writing his first letter, Mike cringed at himself again. He crumpled the paper up, shoving it in a drawer in his desk. Shaking his head, he decided writing a letter to El would take his mind off Will. It was shorter than the one for Will, and he hesitated signing it with love like he’d done with Will’s. Instead, he signed it From, Mike. He sent that one after Byers’ new phone number and address arrived in the mail the next day. Mike didn’t call. He received a letter from Will a week and a half later. Mike didn’t write a response to that one. The thought was too anxiety-inducing. He received another letter at the start of September. He didn’t send his response to that one either.
Mike ended up calling the Byers quite a few times (most of them going unanswered due to Joyce’s job), but he mostly stuck to letters, never sending the ones he wrote to Will. He knew he was being a bad friend, but…Will deserved better than him. He didn’t receive any more letters or calls from Will after Halloween, despite continuing the trend of writing letters he’d never send. He figured Will had found a new best friend. He didn’t bother finding out.
He wasn’t able to go to Lenora for Thanksgiving, due to catching the flu a few days before his plane was due to leave. Will and El couldn’t come to Hawkins for Christmas because of money issues, so Mike wasn’t going to see either of them until he went to Lenora for spring break. It was okay, though, because after winter break ended, Eddie started a new campaign called the Cult of Vecna. Despite the new distraction, Will was still the main thing on his mind, as he had been since August. He thought Will would like the Cult of Vecna.
Soon enough, it was spring break of 1986, and he was hopping on a plane to Lenora, California at 7:00 AM. Mike’s stomach fluttered with anxiety and excitement at the prospect of seeing his friend and girlfriend again. In El’s last letter, she had mentioned Will was painting something for a girl, which had sent a sinking feeling of dread and jealousy to Mike’s head. He was glad Will had found someone, but he couldn’t help holding onto the sliver of hope that maybe Will was like him. Maybe Will liked boys, and maybe Will liked Mike. Those had been silly (and gross) thoughts, though. When Mike got to Cali, he did his best to keep his distance from Will. He denied his friend a hug, and ignored the look on Will’s face at the rejection. He ignored the terrible feeling he got when Will said he’d brought a painting he’d been working on. It must be the one he was working on for the girl. Cool, he’d said.
Jonathan’s strange friend Argyle smelled of diesel fuel, and spoke with his words slurred, so Mike figured he was a stoner. Which was weird, because Jonathan had never really had friends in Hawkins, let alone stoner ones, but Mike didn’t care enough about Will’s older brother’s affairs to bother asking what that was about. Plus, Argyle was nice enough to drive them to every destination El had planned for them, so Mike figured it didn’t really matter.
Of course, like every fucking year since 1983, something just had to go wrong. This time wasn’t a supernatural occurrence, though, this time was El getting publicly humiliated. Then he and Will fought, and El was hitting some girl in the face with a roller skate. Which…yeah, the girl definitely deserved it, but Mike had never seen El use physical violence. Every other time she’d done something like that it’d been with her mind. And, yeah, it had shocked (scared) him when she’d done it, but he didn’t think any less of her. All the three of them could do was wait until Argyle and Jonathan picked them up.
They arrived at the time Jonathan had apparently told Will they would, and the car ride home was tense. On Mike, Will, and El’s part, at least. Jonathan and Argyle both seemed stoned out of their minds, and had no issue making El probably feel worse. By the time they got home, Mike had rethought his and Will’s argument over about a hundred times. He wondered if mentioning the box of unsent letters in his closet would make Will feel worse or better. He decided not to chance getting the answer.
Walking into the Byers’ house, there was strange music playing, and some bald dude with a beard and glasses cooking dinner. Mike hadn’t recognized him, but apparently Jonathan did, a small “Hi Murray!” coming from next to him. Murray asked if they liked risotto, which Mike had never heard of.
El stared at Murray for a moment before turning on her heel to her room, leaving Argyle, Jonathan, Will and Mike standing in the family room. Murray nodded toward the seats.
“This won’t be done for a little while, so you kids can relax. Maybe turn on the TV or something, I dunno.” Murray gave a crooked smile, looking at the four of them, his eyes pausing to look between Will and Mike. The man’s eyes shone with something akin to mischief, and Mike was suddenly that much more afraid of him. He’d known of Murray, in theory, because he’d helped Hopper and Joyce get rid of the Russians back at Starcourt. Nancy had also mentioned him in passing when she was talking about the press release of Barb’s death and how she and Jonathan got together, but Mike had never met the man in person.
Mike shuffled into the family room stiffly behind Will, sitting next to him on the couch.
“Um. Are we gonna bring my bags in?” Mike asked tensely, scratching his cheek as he looked at Will. Will turned his head to look at Mike in disbelief, squinting at him, then nodding slowly. Mike figured he had forgotten that there was luggage in the first place. Or maybe he didn’t like how Mike was pretending nothing had happened. Probably the latter.
“Yeah, ‘course. Let’s eat dinner first, though, ‘m starving.” Will gave him a hesitant, tired smile and fuck , that wasn’t good for Mike’s heart.
El came out of her room in a new outfit about 15 minutes later, the ends of her hair still wet from the shower Mike assumed she took. She still looked really upset, her eyes scanning the room.
“Where is Joyce?” Her voice shook slightly, and the question was aimed at Murray, who pointed to the garage. El walked away, fidgeting with the ends of her sleeves. Mike made no move to follow.
A few minutes after that, El re-entered the room, this time with Joyce. She waved at the kids, walking over to Mike to give him a quick hug.
“Hey, Mike! Long time no see, huh?” Joyce’s smile reminded Mike a lot of Will’s. They were both kind, soft smiles.
“Hi, Ms. Byers, it has been a while. Thank you for letting me stay here.” Mike did his best to return the smile, to which Joyce patted him on the shoulder. Murray called them all to dinner, interrupting the short reunion. Mike sat down next to El and Murray, across from Argyle.
Dinner was an awkward affair. El didn’t talk through the whole thing, Murray rambling enough for all of them. Apparently, Joyce was going on some business trip to Alaska, and Mike was pretty sure her and Murray were flirting. Ew. Argyle started talking about the attack at the roller rink, and of course Mike just had to make a sarcastic comment and make everything worse, didn’t he? He could feel El and Will both turn to look at him, but he kept his head down, looking at his food. El got up and stormed off. Will sighed from next to him as Joyce and Murray watched in confusion, Murray commenting on how tense it was.
Mike and Will finished their dinners in silence, Murray making lighthearted conversation with the other three sat at the table. Mike kept stealing glances at Will, who was refusing to look at him. He guessed if he wanted his luggage he’d have to ask Argyle or Jonathan, which wasn’t ideal, but Mike could deal with it. He wasn’t liking the rush of feelings he’d been experiencing since he had landed. It seemed like everything he’d worked to finally get rid of, in terms of his stupid feelings for Will, had returned. Another thing that was less than ideal. He wasn’t sure if he could deal with this one, though. Jonathan and Argyle finished their food and went to sit in the family room, Mike following. Will didn’t join them, despite also being done. Mike could still hear Murray’s loud laughter from his place on the couch.
After Joyce finished her dinner, she entered the family room and motioned for Mike to follow her.
“Have you gotten a tour yet, sweetie?” She asked, slightly tilting her head at Mike. He shook his head, to which she smiled. “I guess I’ll do the honors, since Will seems pretty tired.” She led him around the house, pointing out the rooms and random decor she liked. Mike had always loved Joyce, she was always so kind to him.
He sometimes wondered what having such a kind parental figure would be like. His mom was okay, of course, he thought she raised him pretty well, but Joyce was always a huge part in her kids’ lives. Almost everything she did was for Will and Jonathan, and she seemed so accepting. She never wanted to force her kids into a box, unlike Mike’s dad, who always had something to say about his and Nancy’s decisions, despite barely being an active father anyway. When Mike was a kid, he used to imagine his parents in a happy marriage, and when he realized that was unrealistic, he’d remind himself to never be like them.
He couldn’t help but think that maybe being in a relationship with El was betraying his younger self in a way. He knew his feelings for El likely didn’t extend beyond friendship, and was starting to sincerely doubt he ever felt that way for her. And although it made him feel gross to think about, he was doubting he even liked girls. If he stayed with El, it would likely end in an unhappy marriage, and kids that hated them.
“Mike?” Joyce was waving her hand in front of his face. “Are you still with me?” Mike blinked a few times.
“I’m sorry, Ms. Byers, I got totally lost in thought there.” Joyce nodded in understanding and gestured to the room they were standing in front of.
“This will be your room while you stay here. Remember that El is next door and Will and Jonathan are across the hall.” She smiled at him one more time. “I have an early flight, so I’m gonna do the dishes and head on to bed. If you need anything let me or Jonathan know.” Mike nodded eagerly, waving to her as she headed down the hallway to her own room. He turned slowly back towards the guest room, flipping on the lamp that was sitting on the dresser next to the door. He then backed out of genuinely going into the room, choosing instead to knock softly on Jonathan’s door, which was next to Will’s.
“Uh, one sec,” Jonathan yelled through the door, sounding the slightest bit panicked. Mike could hear Argyle giggling from inside the room.
“It’s Mike, I just need help getting my bags.” he sighed, not wanting to interact with them while they were stoned any longer than needed. Jonathan opened the door, holding the keys to Argyle’s van in one hand, eyes tinted red.
“Follow me.” Jonathan said, almost robotically. Argyle also stood, trailing after Mike and Jonathan.
“I’m going to the scrapyard anyway,” He said in explanation when Jonathan looked at him weirdly. “You coming with, dude?” Jonathan nodded slowly and opened the front door, leading the two black-haired boys to the pizza van parked in the Byers’ driveway.
“Are you gonna need us to help carry these in or are you good?” Jonathan asked as he handed Mike his bags out of the back. Mike couldn’t tell if he was joking or not, since Jonathan was staring at him kind of blankly. He shook his head anyway and thanked them both for unlocking the van for him, letting himself back inside. He found Will staring at the TV with mild interest when he looked into the family room. Will didn’t bother turning to look at Mike, which he guessed was fair enough.
Mike put his bags in his room, lingering by the door. He wanted to go into the family room with Will, but he knew they weren’t exactly on the best of terms, so he held back. He ended up grabbing his pajamas and toothbrush from his bags, heading to the bathroom to shower and brush his teeth. He didn’t see Will or El again before he went to sleep.
El didn’t show up for breakfast the next morning, and Mike could feel Will’s eyes boring into him the whole time. He ignored it. Instead he picked up El’s plate, which was surely getting cold, and took it to her. He could still feel Will’s eyes on him as he left. It gave him goosebumps.
He and El had a fight. A real, genuine, adult fight. She broke up with him. For real this time, it seemed. Mike was silently relieved. A hint of panic had risen in him, not wanting to lose the safeguard of a relationship, but he was sure both he and El needed time to themselves. He was about to voice that thought to her, since she’d started to calm down, when there was a knock from the front door.
Mike turned toward the noise, before looking back at El, questioning. He vaguely heard El’s name being said, someone asking if a Jane Hopper lived there, making El glance back at him. She offered a shaking hand to help him stand, dropping it immediately after, wiping off the stray tears still on her face as they slowly walked toward the main room together.
It was the fucking cops. Wanting to arrest a fucking fourteen year old, apparently. Because that was apparently allowed. Mike stayed on the stairwell, trying to not say something stupid to the cops, since that probably wouldn’t bode well for him or El. Will stood next to him. Mike tried to not steal a few glances at him, since El was looking at Mike the whole time the cops put the cuffs on her. Were those really necessary?
The police led El out of the house, Jonathan, Will and Mike following closely behind. Jonathan asked where they were taking her and Mike voiced his question about the handcuffs, not getting an answer from the assholes as they shoved El into the car. Mike tried to reassure her that he would fix it and make sure everything worked out, but while he talked, she’d looked at him with a resigned look that struck him through the heart.
The look told him she didn’t need him anymore, and that scared Mike. It scared him to death. He needed to be needed, even if it was by his now ex-girlfriend that he wasn’t sure if he was ever in love with. Maybe that was why he clung to their relationship so much, the codependency of it keeping him sane.
He watched the police car leave, hearing Will and Jonathan on the concrete behind him. He heard Will ask if their mom’s flight had left yet, and turned just in time to see Jonathan sprint back into the house. The visual made him laugh softly under his breath. Will gave him a weird look at that, before turning to go back inside as well. Mike followed closely. They didn’t speak.
Once inside, Jonathan was at the phone, desperately dialing the airport’s number, before deciding it was no use.
“I’ll call Argyle to take us to the station, you guys sit tight.” Jonathan said firmly, nodding them toward the family room. Will and Mike exchanged a glance, but agreed anyhow, figuring they couldn’t exactly do anything. They still didn’t speak, while they sat and waited, but Mike still spent most of that time staring at Will. Wanting something he couldn’t have. He wanted to trace the line of Will’s jaw and the curve of his nose, he wanted the bright green eyes that were staring at the TV to look at him with the same intensity. Mike let out a shaky sigh, turning his eyes to the TV, not noticing how Will turned to look at him.
Once Argyle arrived, fifteen minutes later, he drove them to the station as fast as possible. Luckily, the station wasn’t too far from the Byers residence, and they were able to ask the lady at the front desk about El almost immediately. Argyle stayed in the car.
They were unable to see El, but as they left, Mike spotted the police van pulling out. He ran after it, not being able to get it to stop, muttering to himself and turning back to Will and Jonathan. Jonathan held a look of pity, and Will’s eyes were following the retreating van, a distressed furrow to his brow.
The three of them got the still-waiting Argyle to take them home, Jonathan paying him a bit for gas money and to make up for the time away from work. As soon as they got in, Mike went to his room, figuring Jonathan and Will would let him know when they got ahold of Joyce. He had barely slept the night before, so he took a nap, waking up close to dinner time.
Mike groggily waddled to the family room, seeing Will sitting on the couch still looking deeply stressed. Jonathan wasn’t in the room anymore, but Mike could hear him pacing in his room.
He sat down silently on the couch next to Will, cracking his knuckles awkwardly. Had they still been kids Mike would have reached out and held his friend’s hand, or wrapped him in a hug, or done something comforting, but he felt as though Will wouldn’t want him to do that type of stuff anymore. They were both turning 15, for Christ’s sake, they couldn’t act like kids anymore.
It took until after dark to receive any news about El. Jonathan had been back in the family room with Will and Mike, when he perked up, saying he heard a car approaching. He walked outside, Will following close behind. Mike hesitated before following the two of them. A woman and two men in dark suits stepped out, the woman introducing herself before inviting herself into the Byers’ house.
She explained that there were a few killings in Hawkins, ones that were done by something otherworldly, and that Dr. Owens was taking El under his wing to regain her powers. Which was insane. Mike had gotten up and started pacing, worried for his now ex-girlfriend, as she was still his friend.
After a few minutes of back-and-forth between the lady and the three of them, the lady said she was leaving the men with them and that she was working to contain the situation until Eleven was ready. The whole situation was utterly ridiculous, but she was adamant and unmoving about her concerns. Once assured that she was trusted, the lady had given Mike a note from El, which he immediately left to El’s room so he could read it. The note read,
Dear Mike,
I have gone to become a superhero again.
From, El
Mike slowly put the note down. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, but it wasn’t that. He was glad she had at least left him something, though, even if it was a direct callback to their breakup fight. He was glad she would have the opportunity to find a new boyfriend. Or girlfriend. Mike wouldn’t judge. Obviously. He sighed loudly, holding the note to his chest as he laid back on El’s bed, trying to recap everything that had happened since he’d arrived. His girlfriend got publicly humiliated, then he fought with his best friend, then he found out Joyce was leaving, his girlfriend broke up with him, his ex-girlfriend got arrested, and now she has gone off to gain her powers back. And he was gonna be alone with Will for the rest of break.
Alone. With Will. For the rest of break.
Shit.
Mike opted to head back to his room for the night. It was all way too much to process, and he just wanted to fucking sleep.
When he awoke the next morning, he laid in bed for as long as his body would let him. Eventually he got too hungry to stay wallowing in self-pity (and he had to piss), so he dragged himself into the bathroom then into the kitchen. Will was there, hand clutched around a box of cereal, eyes blankly staring into the bowl he’d probably prepared. Mike cleared his throat as he stepped into the kitchen, making Will jerk his eyes up to him, gaze softening in a way that had Mike’s stomach fluttering. They stared at each other, neither moving, for a good while. Mike really thought he should look away, or something, but he felt so warm under Will’s gaze. How could something so wrong feel so nice? Why wasn’t he allowed to look at his, frankly beautiful, best friend as though the boy had single-handedly created the sun and the moon and the stars? Because, a voice in his head chimed in, you don’t deserve someone so wonderful.
That was enough to make Mike look away, swallowing the lump in his throat as he grabbed breakfast. Which was a Pop-Tart. He chewed solemnly on the treat, sitting on one of the barstools, trying his best to ignore the agents watching TV right behind him. Will slowly sat down next to him, after a couple of minutes. They ate in silence before Will got up to put his bowl away, motioning for Mike to follow him. Mike’s heart jumped. He led Mike to Jonathan’s room, where the mentioned was laying on the floor. It was the farthest room away from the agents, therefore it had the most privacy.
Mike sat awkwardly, not really knowing what to say to either of the Byers, before Jonathan got up and announced he was going to the kitchen. Will sighed loudly, beginning a rant about the people who’d taken El. Mike pulled out the note she’d left him, staring at it as Will ranted. He was thinking about their fight, about how she’d actually broken up with him. He said ‘Yeah’ and ‘Uh-huh’ when he agreed with something while Will spoke, to show he was paying attention, but Will cut himself off at some point anyhow.
He sat down next to Mike, much too close for Mike’s heart to continue going at a normal rate, telling him that the note won’t change if he keeps staring at it. Mike agreed and threw the thing away, and oh god, he and Will were definitely about to have a heart-to-heart, weren’t they? Mike licked his lips, thinking of something to say, deciding on telling Will about his and El’s fight. He left out the part where they broke up. He wasn’t sure why. He was probably too distracted by Will’s lips, which he couldn’t stop looking at.
The way Will was looking at him made Mike feel sick. In a good way. Probably. He barely listened to Will reassure him about El, because he didn’t really want to get back with her. He engaged more in the talk when Will brought up Owens and them, and Mike couldn’t pull his gaze away from Will as the boy talked. Everything about Will was alluring, from his soft brown hair, to his big green eyes, to the mole above his lips, to the way his hands would fidget and move around animatedly as he spoke.
“Looks like it’s gonna be up to us again.” Mike responded once Will was done, still shamelessly staring. Will was staring right back at him.
“It always is, isn’t it?” They shared a smile at that, Mike chuckling softly.
“Which is why we can’t stay here.” Jonathan interrupted their moment, making Mike awkwardly jump away from Will’s side. He hadn’t realized how close he’d gotten. Jonathan continued on with what he was saying, proposing they go to Hawkins. He showed the Surfer Boy Pizza coupon in his hand, suggesting Argyle drive them. The plan was a bit insane, but Mike was on board. Will was too, after a bit of convincing from Jonathan. So Mike and Will went to the agents, asking to order some pizza, to which they agreed surprisingly easily.
The plan was in motion, now all they had to do was pack. Mike had barely unpacked, so he grabbed his duffle bag and shoved the few things he’d unpacked into his knapsack, before making his way to Will’s room.
“You’re packed already?” Will asked in disbelief from where he was kneeling on the floor in front of his dresser, turning slightly to address Mike as he walked into the room. Mike thought Will looked beautiful as he turned back to grab some stuff out of his drawer. Mike made sure to close the door that time, hoping Jonathan wouldn’t interrupt again.
“Uh, yeah, I mean. I never really unpacked.” Mike huffed out a breath, dropping his luggage on the ground and sitting down roughly. Mike chewed on his lip, tapping his hands on his thighs as he thought about what to say to Will. He figured he should start with a thank you. “Thanks, by the way.” God, why was he so nervous? Will turned his head, voice lilting in confusion.
“For what?” Mike tried to conceal his nervous smile as he continued to watch Will pack.
“For knocking some sense into me. I mean, I was being a total self-pitying idiot.” He figured self-deprecation was reason enough to give Will a genuine smile. Will was always worth the weird ego-crushing experience that was Mike admitting he was wrong. Will’s returning smile was sly, enough to make Mike’s breathing uneven. Totally worth it. Despite his sly smile, Will’s eyes were genuine and open, turning his whole body to look at Mike as he shrugged.
“I didn’t say it.” He almost seemed nervous, in a sense, his gaze was expectant. Mike had to look away for a moment as he nodded, attempting to keep any traces of flirting out of his tone.
“You didn’t have to.” Mission failed. He smiled at Will again, bigger this time, nerves overtaking his chest and stomach. His hands were still on his lap, twitching as he resisted the urge to clench them. Will’s mouth was slightly parted as he looked up at Mike, ending up in a weird half-smile as he turned back toward his dresser. Mike tried to not let the hurt that blossomed at the non-rejection affect him as he continued on, figuring he should totally apologize to the boy in front of him, unable to stop his smile from dropping as he contemplated his next words. He shifted nervously, hoping Will somehow forgot how to read his body language over the 8-month-long break. “Hey, also, uh— about these past few days,”
“You don’t have to say anything. I was being a total jerk to El. I— I deserved it.” Will cut him off, quick to take any mistreatment aimed at him. He had always been like that, ever since they were kids. The idea that Will thought he deserved the harsh words from a couple days prior was enough to make Mike immediately deny it.
“No.” Mike furrowed his brows, unable to comprehend that Will thought so lowly of himself. He vaguely wondered if it was partly his fault. “No, No. No, you didn’t deserve anything.”
Mike tried to ignore the way his heartbeat grew fast upon noticing the way Will’s head snapped to look at Mike once again. The way Will’s attention was fully on him, the way Will sat on his feet to continue to look at him, it was so bad for Mike’s heart. He was supposed to be repressing the queer thoughts, not indulging them. He continued to stumble over his words, trying to tell Will. Tell Will how horrible the first month without him was, how it felt like the Party had fallen apart without him, how Mike had fallen apart without him. Tell Will how he felt like he lost him— how he had lost him, all because Mike was too much of a fucking coward to just call the Byers a few more times than he’d tried.
Instead, what came out was, “Listen, the truth is, the last year has been…weird. Y’know?” Which probably wasn’t the best start, but Mike was adamantly not looking at Will’s reaction, too scared of how his friend may have been reacting to Mike being open. Mike was quick to try and backtrack without sounding like he was backtracking. “And I mean— y’know, Max and Lucas and Dustin, they’re,” Mike chanced a look at Will, regretting it immediately. He screamed at himself to continue and stop indulging his queer thoughts. “They’re great, it’s just. It’s Hawkins, it’s not the same without you. And I feel like maybe, I—I was worrying too much about El, and I dunno, maybe I feel like I lost you or something. Does that make sense?”
Mike felt like such an idiot, but Will nodded in agreement anyway, so maybe he wasn’t a complete dumbass. He blinked a few times at the floor, inhaling sharply before continuing again, eyes flickering between Will and the window as he spoke. “I have no idea what’s gonna happen next.” Mike swallowed deeply, sending a glance at Will, locking eyes with his friend. If he was more delusional, he’d say Will looked on the verge of tears. “But… Whatever it is, I—I think we should work together. I think it’ll be easier if we’re a team. Friends. Best friends.” He wasn’t sure why affirming their friendship felt so much like flirting, but Mike’s heart would not stop beating. His hands were shaking, but the small (amazed?) smile on Will’s face as he nodded was worth any internal nerves and shame.
“Cool.” Will’s response was so simple, it felt so out of place compared to what Mike had said. Despite this, Mike quirked an eyebrow and smiled as well, nodding back at Will.
“Cool.” They looked at each other for a moment, the eye contact becoming too much just as the sound of tires skidding interrupted whatever moment they’d been having. Mike’s eyes darted to the door. “That was fast.” Thank god it was, too, because Mike had been starting to think that—
“Thirty minutes or less.”
Turns out, it was most definitely not the pizza, if the gunshots were anything to go by, it was people looking for El. Scariest shit ever. Thankfully, Argyle arrived not long after the shootout had started. Unfortunately, he arrived a bit too late for the guard guy. He was bleeding, there was so much blood. He had been protecting them, which was nice, but shit he looked on the verge of death. Jonathan yelled at them to put pressure on the wound, which they did, but the blood wouldn’t stop flowing. Argyle kept driving, and the ones in the back kept pressure on the wound, until eventually the skies became overcast and the man told them they needed to warn Dr. Owens. He was saying something about how El was in danger, and how they needed to reach Nina. He died before he could tell them the phone number, though, and the government cars were catching up. They screamed at Argyle to get off the road, which he did after a bit of freaking out.
While they were driving through the desert to find somewhere to bury the guy and calm down, Jonathan explained their situation to Argyle. Mike and Will sat in relative silence, both still in shock about the dude bleeding out in front of them.
Eventually, Argyle stopped at a car scrapyard, still freaking out over everything he’d been told and the guy dying. They all stepped out of the van, Jonathan prompting Will and Mike to help him find some shovels in the scrapyard. They dug a hole big enough to fit the guy, before they had to actually put him in the grave, at which point Argyle was full-on yelling about how messed up the whole thing was. Jonathan, ever the genius, told him to smoke more weed. Will wasn’t very happy with that, understandably so, but Mike stayed silent. He was thinking over Argyle’s words, about how they were probably gonna kill all of them and El.
He stared at the ground as his mind ran over the words, before his mind drifted to Will, as it usually did. He looked up at Will, only to find Will’s eyes were already on him. Mike looked Will up and down a few times before turning back to the task at hand, AKA burying a dead man. He ignored how warm his cheeks were, the expression on Will’s face burned into his head. He looked almost…longing. That wasn’t the case, obviously, since Will was normal, and they both had bigger things to worry about anyway.
They finished burying the guy in silence, only interrupted by Argyle’s occasional commentary. Once they finished, Jonathan offered both Mike and Will each a 7Up, which was gratefully accepted by Mike. Will didn’t take one, choosing instead to sit on top of a car, patting the space next to him for Mike to sit.
“You can’t let him get to you. He’s stoned out of his mind, doesn’t even know what he’s talking about.”
Mike agreed, to some extent, but he knew Argyle was right. He voiced this, mentioning how he felt El maybe would have taken him with her— that if the guy had lived a bit longer, they’d know where she was. He didn’t tell Will why he hadn’t explained himself to her. He didn’t want unnecessary questions, such as “Why didn’t you just say it?” or worse, “Do you love her?” Of course, he knew those questions could be avoided if he told Will that he and El had broken up, but…
“Sometimes I think it’s just scary to open up like that. To say how you truly feel, especially to people you care about the most, because what if they don’t like the truth?” Will spoke through Mike’s train of thought, and god could he relate to the words. Not loving El, for one, and whatever it was he was feeling for Will. Neither of them would like those truths. Mike nodded his agreement, when their discussion was interrupted by Argyle asking for the dead dude’s name and— wait.
Wait.
The pen. The fucking pen that Unknown Hero Agent Man had given to him right before he died. Mike voiced this thought to Will before quickly walking over to Argyle to take the pen and holy shit he was right. There was a number on the inside of the pen. Romantic feelings (and lack thereof) for Will and El aside, Mike needed to make sure El was okay. He wasn’t a monster, he still cared about her.
They all immediately rushed to the car, and for some reason they let Argyle drive again. They drove till they saw a payphone, stopping to dial the number.
After dialing the number, Mike noticed the other line wasn’t ringing, it was just a bunch of weird beeping. It reminded Mike of video games at the arcade. He wondered if Will would make the same connection, which he did unsurprisingly. They were calling a computer, not a person, which made the whole thing a bit more difficult. They rushed back to the van, Mike taking out the map that Jonathan said was in the glove compartment, because the thought of computers brought one person to mind.
Will picked up what he was putting down, apparently, as he started singing The NeverEnding Story, causing Jonathan to realize what he meant as well.
So they were back on the road not even five minutes later, after pissing and reapplying deodorant for the trip. They couldn’t exactly shower in the middle of the desert.
Mike slept most of the van ride to Suzie’s, and from the looks of it when he woke up, so did Will.
Suzie’s house was mostly uneventful, despite Mike fighting for his life every time he was close to Will, brain screaming at him. He’d started to care the tiniest bit less over the trip, about being a queer, as there were way more important things to worry about.
What mattered was that they finally got the coordinates to El’s location, thanks to their genius distraction tactics, and left Suzie’s house almost as quickly as they had arrived. The only distraction being Argyle getting stoned with Eden, but that was over with fast as well, Jonathan rushing them out of the van. He took over driving to Nevada, and jesus fuck they were on the road again. Nine whole hours on the road, in a confined space with Will, not good for Mike’s mental health or whatever. Maybe he’d have a heart attack so he wouldn’t have to deal with the shitty feelings rushing through his heart and head and stomach.
The long car ride gave him more time to contemplate, though. Which probably wasn’t good, in retrospect, but whatever. He made light conversation with Will, hoping his friend wouldn’t notice the stares thrown his way. Will was just so pretty.
At some point, maybe halfway through the ride, Will had fallen asleep. Not a huge deal. Or, it wasn’t, until a small bump in the road had caused Will to lay his entire side into Mike. Mike didn’t mind. He was sure he’d die of lack of oxygen from holding his breath before he’d have the chance to care.
A memory appeared in Mike’s head, one of the summer before eighth grade, of Will falling asleep in his lap. It was almost laughable, how little he’d changed in almost two years. He was thinking so similarly, about how pretty Will was. He swallowed thickly, nervously tapping his finger on his leg, before sighing and resigning to closing his own eyes, taking a chance at laying his head on top of Will’s. Which was really embarrassing, honestly, he wasn’t sure why he did that.
Maybe to make Will feel less awkward about using Mike as a mattress when he woke up. God only knew how often Will would apologize for silly things. He was the kindest person Mike had ever met. He dozed into an unrestful nap after a while of thinking.
When he woke up again, Jonathan had stopped at a gas station about two hours away from Nina. He had been nudged awake by Will, who’d said nothing, but the grateful smile sent Mike’s way told him all he needed to know.
They all pissed again, getting a couple sodas before continuing the drive. Will and Mike talked a lot more at that point, and at one point, Will asked how close Nina was to Vegas. Mike told him, obviously. Will’s face brightened,
“Well, once we save her– El– we should stop on the way back. El could make us, like, super rich, and we’d never have to work. We could just play D&D and Nintendo for the rest of our lives.” God, he was such a nerd. Mike loved him (loved him?) so much. He couldn’t stop himself from smiling at the idea, responding with a “Yeah, totally.” before turning his head back to the map, shaking his head slightly. He couldn’t indulge in his weird fantasies of living with Will forever, not even when they were suggested by Will. That, along with the guilt from their fight in the summer of ‘85 coming back to him.
Will seemed to interpret Mike’s standoffish reply as something else, maybe along the same lines as their fight, as his excited smile slowly dropped.
“We’re gonna make it, Mike. She’s gonna be okay.” Mike knew that. El was strong. He just wasn’t sure how their friendship would recover after everything that happened.
“Yeah. I know. I— I know she is. But.. but what if after all this is over, she… sh— she doesn’t need me anymore?” God. He was being ridiculous. And he was lying to Will. It wasn’t exactly about being needed, though that was nice, it was about their friendship. The bond they’d shared since they were 12. He was afraid he’d thrown it all out of the window by not being able to say three fucking words. Will seemed to think that wasn’t a possibility, telling Mike that El would always need him, but Mike couldn’t bring himself to believe that. He told Will how he felt he didn’t deserve her, how their meeting was dumb luck, how he felt they weren’t fated to be together, and what did Will do?
Beautiful Will Byers pulled out the painting he’d had at the airport. When had he even packed that? Mike watched as Will rolled it around in his hands for a moment, seeming really nervous. Unusual. Mike understood his nervousness when Will hesitantly held the painting out to him. Okay. So. It was for him? Mike put the map on the floor next to him as he grabbed the rolled up painting from his friend, slowly unrolling it. He pretended to not notice Will’s unmoving gaze directed at the side of his face, instead focusing on the painting he was unrolling, face breaking into a huge smile as he took in the whole thing. It was so pretty, it reminded Mike of the old D&D handbooks. He turned to Will, a wide smile still on his face.
“This is amazing! Did you paint this?” Will’s nervous expression turned into a relieved one, nodding and smiling slightly at Mike.
“Yeah. Yeah, I mean.” Will turned away from Mike, smile wiped off his face. “I mean. I mean, El asked me to. She commissioned it, basically. I mean, she told me what to draw.” Will shook his head lightly, turning back to Mike, leaning in to point at Mike’s character in the painting Mike ignored how his heart rate sped up, and ignored the way he felt saddened at the fact that El had asked Will to make the painting. Which was weird, because El had no interest in D&D and had thought the painting was for a girl, but whatever. “Anyway, my point is, see how you’re leading us here? You’re guiding the whole party, inspiring us. That… that’s what you do. And see your coat of arms here? It’s a heart. And I know it's sort of on the nose, but that’s what holds this party together. Heart. Because, I mean, without heart, we’d all fall apart. Even El, especially El.”
Mike couldn’t keep his eyes off of Will, only looking away to look at the beautiful painting in his hands. He didn’t really feel like the heart, but Will was so passionate about his art, it was hard to not agree with him.
“These past few months, she’s been so lost without you. It’s just, she’s so different from other people… And when you’re– when you’re different… sometimes you feel like a mistake.”
And— oh. Oh.
Will wasn’t talking about El anymore, was he?
Will hadn’t been talking about El at all. The realization hit like a brick, and for once in his life, Mike indulged himself. He smiled genuinely at Will, taking in every single word that was being said, feeling genuinely loved and validated for the first time in literal years. He didn’t even stop himself from glancing at Will’s lips, from thinking of kissing him when Will spoke so earnestly. He was wanted, needed by the boy he had quietly been repressing his feelings for. He made Will feel like he wasn’t a mistake, he was Will’s heart. Holy shit. Will finally finished talking, and all Mike could say was “Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Will was tearing up, Mike realized, but he didn’t know what to say, instead choosing to smile at Will as Will turned to look out the window.
Looking back down at the painting in his hands, Mike couldn’t wipe the smile off his face. He wasn’t sure whether or not he should mention to Will that he knew. He knew Will liked him, and that he liked Will back.
Shit.
Wait.
This wasn’t a good thing.
He wasn’t supposed to be happy about this.
He wasn’t supposed to think about kissing his best friend.
He wasn’t allowed to be happy about this, to think this way.
But…how could Will— beautiful Will Byers— be wrong for feeling like that towards Mike?
Why was it only wrong when Mike felt it towards Will?
Why wasn’t Mike disgusted at how Will was— in love with him? (Was Will even in love with him? Maybe Mike had misinterpreted it, maybe Mike was getting his hopes up for nothing?)
Mike pushed any thought aside as he swallowed the lump in his throat, chest fluttering with an unknown emotion when he turned to look at Will again. Will’s shoulders were shaking. He was crying into his hand, judging by the reflection in the glass. Fuck. Mike had made him cry again. You don’t deserve him.
“Will?” He did it. He spoke without barfing all over the van. Will froze next to him, which Mike took as a sign to continue. “You— you weren’t talking about El, were you?” Will’s head snapped to look at Mike, panic written all over it, cheeks red and eyes swollen from crying. He struggled for something to say, and a small part of Mike hoped his conclusion was wrong. That Will was normal, because if he wasn’t, that would mean Will probably felt the same way toward himself that Mike felt toward his own feelings. Maybe Will really did just think— know that El felt like a mistake, and he really was just super emotional over his sister.
But most of Mike hoped he was right, because that would mean his feelings were reciprocated. He had someone who loved him. Someone he loved back, for real this time. It was such a terrifying thought in the best way possible.
“You– I– What? No, No I– I,” Will stuttered, but cut himself off by snapping his mouth shut, as though he had given up his poor attempt to defend himself. His eyes were darting all over Mike’s face, and Mike couldn’t even begin to think about what expression might be there. Mike took a steadying breath, closing his eyes so hard he saw white. He reached for Will’s hand, and wow, his own hands were shaking like all Hell. Will’s face was still panicked, green eyes full of confusion. He was waiting for Mike to explain. To say something. Mike couldn’t look at him as he spoke.
“Um. Me and El broke up. Before she got taken by the cops.” Mike turned his body to Will, glancing up at his friend’s face. The pure confusion had been replaced with wide-eyed confusion. Mike looked back down at his lap, fidgeting with Will’s hand that he hadn’t let go of yet. “I’m— sorry. For not mentioning that sooner. And for pushing you away. And for anything else I did. I— um.” Mike cut himself off, remembering Jonathan and Argyle were right there up front.
Shit. Will was looking at him expectantly, a hint of uncertainty in his eyes.
Jonathan and Argyle are right there. They’d know. They’d hate you.
Mike couldn’t bring himself to care, for once.
Argyle was asleep, after all, and Jonathan knew better than to interrupt. Right?
Surely Jonathan wouldn’t hate his little brother for being gay, why would he hate Mike for the same reason?
It’s now or never, Mike.
Fuck it.
They were close to stopping anyways.
“I guess I was just… scared. Of— of myself, mostly. And of losing you.” Mike shrugged, before hesitantly bringing his free hand up to cup Will’s cheek. Will flinched, eyes sparkling with more unshed tears. Pretty. “And of how I felt— feel. About you.”
Will’s expression was nothing less than terrified. Mike wanted nothing more than to kiss him. Tell him how much he loved him.
But this conversation was surely one meant for privacy, wasn’t it? Plus, they were approaching Nina. Mike was sure Will wouldn’t appreciate him doing anything impulsive in front of his brother.
Will was scared, though. Mike had to assure him that it was good, that they could talk about it more later. When he was sure Jonathan wasn’t watching, Mike brought Will’s hand up to kiss softly, removing his other hand from Will's face. Will’s cheeks turned red, and Mike Wheeler thought Will Byers was beautiful. He exhaled heavily, muttering,
“We’ll talk more later? I think there’s a lot to talk about.” To which Will slowly nodded his agreement.
He hoped it sounded like a promise to Will. He needed time to think anyway.