Work Text:
“That’s ridiculous, Carole – I did all of that stuff as a kid and I’m perfectly fine.”
Maverick believed himself before; now he wasn’t so sure. I mean- A diagnosis for Autism Spectrum Disorder was kind of hard to argue with, wasn’t it?
“Well, Pete, I’m not sure what to tell you. The doctor said he’s absolutely sure about this, and it’s kind of obvious, looking back,” Carole replied, she sounded a little- what was the word? Exasperated? He thinks so.
“Alright, well, I’ll leave you alone about it then.” Maverick hung up after that, and it was only after he did so that he realized that he probably sounded aggressive, but there wasn’t really anything he could do about it now. He could text her, but that might sound like he’s being clingy and he doesn’t want to bother her too much – but it’d be better than her thinking he was mad at her, so he texted her saying he was sorry for hanging up so abruptly and left it at that.
Now, Maverick knew a little bit about autism. I mean, everyone knows at least a little bit, so it’s not like that was surprising, but still. He knew that it was usually obvious at a younger age, and if you had it you’d usually get diagnosed before four. It was more common in boys, and they usually needed help with simple stuff.
But Bradley could get on pretty well on his own for a seven-year-old, so obviously that couldn’t have been too true. And the fact that he was just getting diagnosed at seven meant that the age one couldn’t be right either, so maybe he didn’t know as much as he thought.
I guess that means it’s time to do a little research, Maverick thought as he sat on the floor next to his desk. He was always better at focusing on the floor than the actual desk, for some reason. Must be another quirk of his.
As he typed “ASD symptoms” into the Google search bar (he always had to use Google, even though he had an iPhone), he wasn’t sure what made him add “adults.”
Maybe he was curious.
Probably not, but he chose to ignore that.
He clicked on the first link, a Medical News Today article. Before even clicking, it showed some, but he... He didn’t want to trust them.
Just glancing at the ones that showed up first made him scared. Or was it worried? He could never tell the difference. Of course, he knew they’d be the same inside the article, but you know.
Difficulty making conversation: With new people, sure, but didn’t everyone? He moved down the list.
Difficulty making or maintaining close friendships: He thought back, and, yeah, kind of. He really only had two real friendships at the moment: Ice and Carole. But that was true with a lot of people, wasn’t it?
Discomfort during eye contact: Well, that was... more specific. But nobody likes making eye contact; it either feels too intimate, or it’s with an authority figure, and both of those would make anyone nervous. But nervous isn’t the same as discomfort, was it? Maybe, Maverick was never good at telling emotions apart. Not smaller ones, at least. Speaking of, he looked at the next one, and, wouldn’t you know it?
Challenges with regulating emotions: That’s not the same as not being able to distinguish them though, right? But... people always did tell him he was emotional. He was just good at hiding it sometimes. This was something he told Carole to ignore in Bradley, saying he just hadn’t learned how to deal with it yet. But Bradley was just a kid – Maverick was 26. He nervously bit his lip – this was starting to make him a little uncomfortable.
Extreme interest in one particular topic: Did automotives count? Surely not, that’s such a broad topic... but it’s still one topic. But everyone had that thing that they’ve liked since they were a kid, didn’t they?
Frequent monologues on the same subject or subjects: That was really similar to the last one. Again, it didn’t really count if it was what you did for a job, did it? People had told him that he talked about flying too much, so he tried to stop talking about it as much, and people stopped saying it, but he still talked about it. He started tapping the side of his phone; he’d come back to that one.
Hypersensitivity to sounds or smells that do not seem to bother others: Maverick let out a little sigh of relief at this one. Finally, one that didn’t apply. In fact, it was the opposite: he was always trying to find more sounds. Nothing was ever loud enough. The knot in his stomach untightened a little – until he read the next one.
Involuntary noises, such as repetitive throat clearing: He... he did do that a lot, didn’t he? He always got in trouble for making noises as a kid, so he stopped, no matter how much he wanted to do it. He didn’t think that throat clearing would count, because he never got in trouble for that. That’s... That’s actually another one of the ones he told Carole not to worry about when she noticed it in Bradley.
Difficulty understanding sarcasm or idioms: That was a lot more specific than some of the others. He did have trouble with that sometimes, but didn’t everyone? Sometimes people don’t make it obvious that they were being sarcastic. Then again, when there were multiple people in the room, he was usually the only one that didn't get it. Idioms, on the other hand... he understood that they didn’t mean what they actually say. Sometimes he didn’t understand how they got the idiom (how do you get from hard rain to animals?), but he could use them.
Lacks of inflection while speaking: No. Well, Maverick didn’t think so, at least. People had told him that sometimes he sounded kind of monotone, but he thought he sounded fine, people just couldn’t tell what he was trying to say. He moved on.
Limited interest in only a few activities: He rolled his eyes at this one. Like, yeah, but some people are just like that. That one can’t possibly count. He’s really only interested in flying, photography, and like... two video games. So what? Sometimes people just don’t like a lot of things.
Preference for solitary activities: Again, some people just... like being alone. It’s not that big of a deal, is it? And this one barely applied to him – he only liked working alone because people never listened to what he was saying. Or, they couldn’t understand him, but still.
Problems reading the emotions of others: Well- if you can’t read your own emotions, you’re not going to be able to read other people, are you?
Trouble understanding facial expressions and body language:
This one’s pretty much the same as the last one, isn’t it? If you can’t tell the difference between emotions, body language doesn’t mean much. Or, maybe he can’t understand other’s emotions because of his difficulty with body language. This was a chicken or the egg problem, wasn’t it? (See? He could use idioms.
He had a strict opinion on
that
one though – the chicken would have had to be first, because the chickens keep the egg the right temperature to hatch properly. And he
did
get upset if anyone implied anything different.
)
Reliance on daily routines and difficulty dealing with change: His initial thought was no, but after thinking about it a little bit... Kind of. I mean, it always made him uncomfortable when he was transferred because he had to change his routines to match. And maybe that’s the reason he can’t change browsers, and the reason he was reluctant to get an iPhone. I mean, he only did because Carole wanted to be able to FaceTime him.
Repetitive behaviors: This one was too broad to decide. What did they mean by behaviors? Movements? The making noises thing? He shook his head a little and moved on.
Social Anxiety: Kind of? This one was a little harder to place. He liked talking to people, but he always ended up worrying if he was doing something wrong. He felt like it was justified, though – I mean, he had always been told he was weird for doing something in a conversation when he was younger, so surely it wasn’t out of the ordinary for him to have a little anxiety.
Superior abilities in a particular field, such as mathematics: Well, you had to be pretty good at math to be good at working on vehicles, didn’t you? And it was kind of important in flying, too. He was a really good flyer, but how good did he have to be to be considered “superior”?
The need to arrange items in specific order: There was no doubt that this one applied to him. He always had to arrange his photos in a specific way, books had to go alphabetical by title (not counting the word “the”), pens had to be color coded by ink color. There were more.
They didn’t all apply, so he was probably fine. He thought as much, at least, until he saw the next line.
“Autistic people will not usually have all the above signs and symptoms, and they may experience others that are not on the list.”
But he was pretty good at hiding most of them, so maybe not?
“Some people may seem able to cope better with social situations than others, as their symptoms may be more subtle and masked.”
Well, shit.
…..
Maybe he should look into this a little more.