Chapter Text
Waking up next to James quickly becomes Regulus’ favorite thing to do.
Despite Regulus valuing his sleep, he finds himself looking forward to waking up next to James in the morning. Even waking up before James becomes something that he likes to do.
It’s early. It’s way too early for Regulus to be awake, actually. The sun is barely even up and there are birds chirping quietly. Sunlight pours in through the blinds that he made James shut last night and the soft hum of the ceiling fan rings pleasantly in Regulus’ ears as he turns over in bed with a groan, stretching his legs out and moving closer to James.
They fell asleep facing away from each other, to James’ dismay. James insisted that they play Mario Kart after dinner, just the two of them as a bit of a fun video game date. Regulus, being the competitive person he is, agreed and took it way too seriously, meaning when James screwed him over a few times in a row, Regulus had a bit of a strop and went to sleep without giving James a kiss goodnight.
But it’s morning now and Regulus is over it, so when he cracks his eyes open and sees James’ relaxed face squished into the pillow with his eyes shut softly, he feels his heart fluttering in his chest at how bloody lucky he is to wake up next to this beautiful, beautiful boy.
Regulus reaches one of his hands out, his breathing slow and quiet as he gently brushes the pad of his finger against James’ face, tracing a small circle on his cheek before pushing James’ hair off of his forehead.
With his awkwardly long legs and clumsy stumbling, James is the least graceful person Regulus has ever met. He constantly has bruises on his shins and knees from walking into tables or chairs, cuts on his hands from cooking dinner with his mum or literally grating cheese , and random bruises on his cheeks or lips from dropping his phone on his face when he’s in bed. He’s insanely clumsy and is never careful.
Despite his clumsiness and carelessness, James looks like a bloody angel when he sleeps. He looks so graceful, so gentle . So soft. Regulus finds it hard to look away from the sleeping boy beside him when he breathes so quietly and snores so softly. His soft lips are parted and his face is completely relaxed, and Regulus just wants to kiss him .
So he does. Regulus moves a little bit closer and brushes James’ hair behind his ear, then leans in and presses a lingering kiss onto his cheekbone. It’s soft, gentle, and he doesn’t want to pull away because he just wants to shower James with kisses and love and everything he deserves. He presses another kiss onto his cheek, then his nose, then the spot between his eyebrows, then his forehead. The kisses are soft, just a simple brush of the lips, careful so that he doesn’t wake James up.
But he does anyway. James stirs in his sleep and lets out a soft noise, his eyebrows furrowing and fingers flexing when he reaches forward a little bit, blindly searching for Regulus’. Regulus feels his stomach flip and he places his hand on top of James’, grabbing it softly and pulling it to his mouth to kiss his fingers.
“‘S too early,” James grumbles under his breath, his voice deep and rough and Regulus feels the need to kiss him until he turns blue . He feels his own eyes soften as he pushes himself up on one elbow, resting his hand on his cheek to peer down at James. He feels his chest pinching pleasantly and he just - fuck .
Slowly, James’ eyes flutter open a little bit, and he blinks at Regulus sleepily, his eyebrows still furrowed together. “You’re staring,” he mumbles, and Regulus snorts, leaning in to kiss his nose again.
“Don’t flatter yourself,” Regulus scoffs. “I was staring at the dry drool on your face,” he jokes, pulling the sleeve of his jumper over his hand, wiping at James’ cheek a little bit.
James shoves his hand away, sucking his teeth and scowling at Regulus. “I don’t like you,” he huffs out, pushing Regulus’ shoulder until he falls onto his back. Regulus squeaks in surprise and before he has a chance to process what just happened, James drops all of his weight on top of him, his chest pressing against Regulus’, one of his legs between his own, and his face in the crook of Regulus’ neck. A soft oof falls from Regulus’ mouth and he tries his best to maneuver James’ body down a little bit until James’ head is against his chest.
“You’re going to suffocate me and I’m going to die and it will be your fault,” Regulus mutters, tugging at James’ hair playfully. James’ eyes flutter shut and he hums, a sleepy smile on his lips.
“Good. I don’t like you.”
Playfully, Regulus chuckles and runs his fingers through James’ hair. “Guess you’ll be fine without a good morning kiss before school then,” he sings, reaching down to pat James arse lightly. “Up. We have to get ready-“
“It’s, like, 5 in the morning,” James whines. “We don’t even have to leave until 8. Kiss me,” he pouts, and Regulus giggles tiredly. “Don’t laugh! I want a kiss.”
“Mm,” Regulus hums, bringing both of his hands to the sides of James’ face and squeezing his cheeks together, smiling when he sees his lips jutting out, glistening a little bit. “No,” he smiles sweetly, then pushes James a little bit until he rolls off of Regulus.
Groans of protest fall from James’ lips when Regulus gets off of the bed and there’s a warm hand wrapping around his wrist. Despite playing hard to get, Regulus scrunches his nose up at the feeling in his stomach when James tugs him onto the bed, on top of his own body. Regulus laughs lightly as James wraps his long legs around his waist, locking Regulus in place with his arms around his neck.
“Holding me hostage?” Regulus asks, voice flat and eyebrow arched as he lifts himself up a little bit, both of his hands flat on the bed on either side of James’ head. James has the dopiest smile on his face, his lips lopsided and his eyes lidded and sparkling and fuck , why does James have to look at him like that?
“All I want is a little good morning kiss,” James bargains, puckering his lips up and moving one hand from Regulus’ neck to his hip, pulling him down gently, and Regulus ignores the way heat tugs at his navel. “If I say please will I get one?”
Regulus snorts, rolling his eyes. “Oh, you poor baby,” he teases, leaning down and pressing a slow kiss to James’ mouth. He feels James sighing happily against his mouth, their lips gliding together deeply and gently and so fucking slowly that Regulus thinks he’s going to die.
One of his hands comes up to rest on the side of James’ neck, the other tangling in his hair as he lowers his body down gently on top of James’, careful not to hurt him or knock the wind out of him. Barely even disconnecting their lips, Regulus murmurs, “can we go get ready now?”
James makes a noise in disagreement, one of his hands traveling up the back of Regulus’ jumper and smoothing down his spine, resting against the dip in his back. “I just want to kiss you,” he whispers quietly, parting his lips slightly and tilting his head to the side. Regulus hums, running a hand through James’ hair and feeling the way James follows the movement, his head falling back. Regulus chases his lips, cupping his neck tighter and catching James’ bottom lip between his teeth, pulling it into his mouth.
“Baby,” Regulus murmurs, pulling away from James with a wet sound. “We have to go to school, you know-“
“It’s 5 a.m.,” James groans, pulling Regulus back down into a deep kiss. Regulus makes a muffled noise in surprise, promptly rolling over and gently tugging James on top of him, both of his hands resting on James’ waist. “Can’t we just-“
“James, it’s nearly 6:30, you need to get out of - woah , oh god . I’m sorry, I-“
“ Baba! ” James groans in embarrassment, and Regulus albeit shoves James off of him and wraps the duvet around his entire body, including his head.
Regulus’ entire face flushes bright red and hot and he feels like he’s going to cry as he thinks, this is how I die , because his boyfriend’s fucking father just walked in on them snogging when they’re supposed to be getting ready for school and said father doesn’t even know that they’re together.
Well, boyfriend is a bit of a loose term at this point. Regulus isn’t exactly sure what they are. They’re going out, yes , but they haven’t exactly had a conversation about if they’re boyfriends or if they’re exclusive. James walks with his arm around Regulus in the hallways and picks him up from his classes, but he’s not really sure .
“I’m sorry! I’m sorry,” Monty laughs awkwardly, and Regulus peeks one eye out from under the duvet and waves shyly. “Good morning, Regulus,” Monty greets.
Regulus clears his throat and nods. “Morning, Mr. Potter,” he croaks out, then hides under the duvet again while James rustles on the sheets and gets off of the bed.
“I didn’t know if you overslept or not,” Monty starts, and Regulus hears a laugh bubbling in his throat. “But I can see that you’re awake. Ammu is making breakfast,” he says, and Regulus lifts the duvet off of his head fully, blinking at Monty in surprise.
“I can explain,” Regulus starts nervously, his face still bright red and his nerves building in his stomach because fuck this is the worst thing that could have ever happened. “I - uh-“
“Regulus,” Monty chuckles. “It’s okay. You’re almost 18 and James is 18. I’m not upset with either of you, just a little surprised is all,” he explains, but he still has a smile on his face and Regulus feels oddly comforted.
Awkward silence falls between the three of them, James standing awkwardly near his bed, one hand on his hip and the other on the back of his head, Regulus still sitting up in bed, and Monty leaning against the doorframe with a knowing smile on his face.
“Do we need to have a talk about safety-“
“No, gods , no! Dad, ew ,” James groans, hiding his face in his hands, and Regulus wants to die . “Baba-“
“I’m joking , James,” he pauses. “But let me know if you do-“
“ Baba, please ,” James whines, and Regulus wheezes loudly, falling face first into the bed and cackling.
-
School is a little bit strange now that Regulus doesn’t see James walking around with his arm around Kristina. He doesn’t have to worry about dodging James in the hallways to avoid his sympathetic glances, nor do his friends have to watch their words to make sure they don’t talk about Kristina or James.
While it’s nice and relaxing, Regulus feels a bit weird. Nice, happy , but weird as hell.
Regulus doesn’t know what he’s expecting, really. James holds his hand for the first time in the hallway and there are whispers all around them, but Regulus can’t find it in him to care as he pulls his hand away from James and tucks it into James’ back pocket instead, pulling him flush against his own body.
They share a kiss after Regulus walks him to class and shockingly, he doesn’t feel nervous about it. Instead, he feels warm and nice and happy knowing that he can be open about it.
He’s not expecting much, really. He expects people to ask him questions, which they do.
Are you dating Potter?
Are you guys hooking up?
Why did Potter kiss you? I thought he was dating Kristina.
I didn’t know Potter was gay, did you turn him gay? He never came out.
Which, no . It doesn’t work like that.
He rolls his eyes and sighs, always replying to the last question with, “I didn’t turn him gay. Multi-gendered attraction exists and he’s allowed to like more than one gender. And for the record, he doesn’t have to come out. He doesn’t need to prove his queerness to anybody.”
Needless to say, people stopped asking Regulus about James.
While he doesn’t expect many things, he certainly doesn’t expect Kristina coming to talk to him during P.E.
“No, Peter,” Regulus whines. “You don’t understand, I’m terrible at embroidery! I need you to do it for me.”
Peter sighs heavily, shaking his head. “I don’t understand why you won’t just let me teach you how to do it,” he points out, raising an eyebrow at Regulus, who widens his eyes in response.
“Do you know how many times I stabbed myself with a needle last time I tried to sew-“
“Embroidery and sewing are two different things.”
“And I don’t care ,” Regulus groans. “Please? Please? ” He begs. “I’ll make you slutty brownies if you do,” he sing-songs temptingly, wiggling his eyebrows at Peter, who cracks into a little grin and shakes his head.
“Give me the slutty brownies first and we have a deal.”
“I’ll make them tonight and James and I will bring them over tomorrow.”
Peter raises an eyebrow at him. “You can’t come alone?” He smirks playfully, and Regulus’ cheeks flush a little bit as he nudges Peter and pushes him away, rolling his eyes.
“You know James won’t let me walk,” he points out. “He thinks that I’m going to get hypothermia and die,” Regulus deadpans, snorting right after.
“We live in California! ” Peter laughs. “In what world will you get hypothermia-“
“He’s just being protective!”
“You two are disgusting . Sickening. You make me want to throw up and then die.”
“How sweet of you,” Regulus says flatly, but the quirk of his lips gives him away. “You’re just angry because Will doesn’t like you back,” he jokes, and Peter gasps dramatically.
“You can’t use my crush against me-“
“Regulus!”
At the sound of his name, both Peter and Regulus turn around, confused looks on their faces. When his eyes fall on Kristina, all of the blood drains from his face and his stomach drops, his eyes wide. Nausea settles in his throat and he glances at Peter, who looks at Regulus with a raised eyebrow before looking back at Kristina.
“Yes?” Regulus questions, not trying to sound malicious or aggressive. He’s just confused, mostly.
She looks nervously between Regulus and Peter, and Regulus looks at Peter quickly, mouthing I’ll be okay , and Peter nods, giving him a small smile and waving at Kristina before walking ahead of them.
Regulus turns back around, waiting for Kristina to join him in his tread around the gym. He feels a bit nervous, honestly, and he doesn’t really know why. This is James’ ex girlfriend. While Regulus doesn’t blame her for anything nor does he hate her, it is a bit uncomfortable to talk to her. Mostly because he doesn’t want to make her uncomfortable, considering the fact that James broke up with her because of Regulus.
He feels guilty is all. Really guilty. He feels like he ruined this girl’s life, even if he didn’t directly do anything to her.
“I just wanted to talk,” Kristina says, a weak smile on her lips. “If that’s alright,” she adds nervously, blinking up at Regulus, who smiled sympathetically at her.
“Of course, it’s alright,” Regulus nods, his lips pressed into a little smile. “Is everything okay?” He asks, raising an eyebrow at her.
Kristina nods, laughing lightly and shaking her head. He can tell something is bothering her, but he doesn’t push. He knows that it won’t help anything, it’ll just make her anxious, and he really doesn’t want that.
“I just,” she swallows thickly, wringing her fingers around each other and looking at the floor. “I’m sorry for… For everything. I, uh, I guess a part of me knew that you liked James and I just… I liked him too,” she chuckles, and Regulus furrowed his eyebrows in worry. “Even if I liked him, I knew I could never love him the way you do,” she states finally, looking up at Regulus and giving him a sad smile.
The sentence strikes deep in Regulus’ chest, shooting down into his stomach, adding on to the guilt pooling in the center.
“And as much as he tried,” Kristina continues, halting her walk around the gym. Regulus stops with her, standing in front of her with his jaw set tight. “I knew he couldn’t love me the way he loves you.”
Regulus swallows, nodding slowly.
“Can I give you a hug?” he croaks, suddenly feeling like he was going to burst into tears.
Kristina doesn’t answer, she just steps forward and wraps her arms around his torso, her head on his chest. Regulus rests his chin on top of her head, his arms wrapping tightly around her shoulders.
“I’m sorry too,” Regulus mumbles. “You deserve someone who will really, really love you the way you deserve, Kristina. And I hope you get that very soon. I really, really do.”
Kristina nods against his chest, and Regulus holds her tighter, his eyes squeezing shut to hold in his tears.
“Take care of him,” she whispers softly.
Regulus allows a tear to fall down his cheek, a sad smile on his lips.
“I always will.”
-
“Guess who talked to me today?” Regulus speaks into the microphone on his earbuds, walking down the hallway to his bedroom.
“Um,” Lily hums. “Lockheart?” She asks, and Regulus groans as he shuts his bedroom door.
“No, ew,” he shudders at the thought, his face settling into a grimace. “You’re bad at this game,” he points out, dropping onto his bed and flipping onto his stomach. “Do you want me to just tell you-“
“I wanna keep guessing!”
“You’re bad at this.”
Lily groans, and Regulus snorts, shaking his head. “Was it Kristina?” She asks, genuinely a bit confused, and Regulus nods, a proud grin on his face.
“You’re good at this game!” He laughs, rubbing at his eyes with his knuckles.
“What did she say?” Lily asks, and Regulus can hear rustling from her side of the phone. He assumes she’s shifting positions on her bed. “Wasn’t that a bit awkward? Like, your boyfriend’s ex-girlfriend? I don’t know,” she hums.
Regulus pauses for a second, reflecting on the conversation. The way that Kristina looked at him with remorse and guilt despite the fact that she had nothing to be or feel guilty about. It made Regulus’ chest twinge a bit. Kristina is a good person, she’s genuinely a sweet girl.
“Not really,” he answers truthfully. “She just… She said that she knew he didn’t love her as much as he loves me and I just felt so bad ,” he mumbles, hearing Lily hissing in response. “I just wish that James didn’t date her, you know? Not because it hurt me, but because she’s sad now. She really likes him. Also, he isn’t my boyfriend. Not yet, at least.”
“That’s James’ idiot mistake,” Lily points out, and Regulus hums in agreement. “Not yours. I feel like he should be the one feeling bad,” she says. “And technically, he is your boyfriend.”
Regulus snorts, choosing to ignore the end of her sentence because they’ve had this argument so many times. “Maybe I’ll berate him for that later,” he sighs, sitting up. “He isn’t home yet, said he had to do something and he’d be home later,” he informs Lily, pursing his lips.
Lily gasps in response. “He didn’t insist on driving you home today?” She asks sardonically, and Regulus scoffs in response, his lips quirking at the corners.
“No,” he laughs lightly. “He wouldn’t tell me what he was doing. He said it was a secret,” Regulus rolls his eyes.
Honestly, he was a bit intrigued. But at the end of the day, it was James’ business. Despite them being romantically involved, he didn’t need to know about everything he was doing. Granted, James was shit at keeping secrets, so he’d probably tell him anyway. But if he wasn’t ready to talk, Regulus wouldn’t force him.
“Do you think he’s getting you something?” Lily asks and Regulus flushes a bit, giggling.
“I don’t think so,” he mumbles, biting the inside of his cheek. “But I’ll see him later and he’ll probably tell me.”
-
James doesn’t end up telling him, actually. He comes home before dinner and he’s awfully giddy as he twirls Regulus around and kisses him before carrying him bridal style down to dinner, despite his protests.
They go to bed a bit early, James claiming that Regulus is grumpy and needs to go to sleep so he’s not mean and snippy, to which Regulus replies with something snarky and turns over in bed without kissing him.
It takes about five minutes for James to maneuver his way onto Regulus’ chest, and about ten for Regulus to fall asleep with James drawing shapes on his chest.
Regulus wakes up at an ungodly hour of the night to James pressing kisses against his cheeks and forehead dramatically while shaking him lightly and mumbling, “baby, baby, baby.” Regulus, had he not been so stupidly in love with James, would have punched him.
He opts for groaning and shoving James off of him, mumbling about needing more sleep as he pulls the duvet over his head, his eyes still pleasantly hazy from sleep as he tries to ignore James poking at his side.
“Reggie,” James whispers, wrapping his arms around Regulus from behind. Regulus grunts in response, trying to pull out of James’ arms so that he could go the fuck to sleep . “Reg. Baby,” James whispers, kissing the back of his head. “Wake up. Please? I have a surprise-“
“James,” Regulus rasps. “The sun is not out, so let me go to sleep ,” he huffs, and James whines.
“You’ll like this surprise!” He argues, and Regulus sighs heavily, feeling himself give in as he turns over, slowly blinking his eyes and rubbing at them with his fists to wipe the gunk and sleepy out. “Hi,” James greets, way too chirpy and alive for this hour. Regulus keeps a straight face, blinking at James before sitting up slowly and stretching his arms over his head and cracking his elbows to try to wake himself up.
Regulus looks at him sleepily, leaning forward a little bit until his head falls into James’ chest and he feels James’ hand smoothing down his spine in a calming manner. “I need to brush my teeth,” Regulus mumbles, yawning into James’ shirt.
“Then brush your teeth.”
Regulus groans, pulling away and raising his arms up. “Carry me. It’s the least you can do after you woke me up at the arse crack of dawn for god knows what,” he mutters. James, being the lovely boy he is, complies simply and hooks both of his hands under Regulus’ thighs, lifting him up. Regulus wraps his arms around James’ neck instinctively, tucking his head into the crook of his neck and pressing a soft kiss there.
“Love you,” Regulus mumbles.
“Love you too,” James replies softly, kissing the side of his head.
-
“Are you going to tell me where we are?” Regulus mumbles, walking in front of James. James has his hands over Regulus’ eyes, refusing to let him see in front of him. He claims that it’s part of the surprise . “Are you going to murder me?” he deadpans.
“Absolutely,” James answers seriously. “Just keep walking and stop asking me questions before I actually do murder you,” he threatens playfully, and Regulus snorts, craning his neck a little bit until his mouth is near James’ arm. He darts his tongue out, licking a stripe up his forearm. James yelps, but he doesn’t pull away, he just groans and says, “you’re so gross, Regulus.”
Regulus smirks, licking him again before relaxing his neck and continuing his trek to god knows where . He hears wind and water, though. Maybe they’re at a lake? He’s not sure. All he knows is that he trusts James to not murder him.
Impromptu hangouts were never Regulus’ thing. He feels the need to have everything planned out from beginning to end. The structure makes him feel in control, makes him feel like nothings going to go wrong. All of his friends know this, so they plan things efficiently and make sure that everything is structured so he isn’t anxious and he truly, truly appreciates it.
There are very few people that Regulus can be spontaneous with. Sirius has always been a safe person for him, so if he ever asked him to do anything at any time, he’d go. Remus, being his best friend, was another. Lily and Evan as well.
But above all, Regulus loved to be spontaneous with James.
It’s easy with James; everything is easy with James. James could drag him out of bed and onto a plane at 4 a.m. and Regulus would just go .
It didn’t matter with James. For some reason, he didn’t mind feeling out of control with James. It didn’t bother Regulus that as he fell, it felt more like flying without direction. He didn’t mind that everyday felt different. He swore that he fell in love more and more every single bloody day.
After a few minutes, James pulls his hands away from Regulus’ eyes and mumbles, “you can look now, babe,” prompting Regulus to blink his eyes open to see his sneaker clad feet digging into sand, the ocean moving gently and calming in front of them.
Immediately, a huge grin breaks out across Regulus’ face as he turns around to look at James, who’s spreading a blanket out on the ground and placing the backpack that he was carrying on top of it.
“Stupid fluttery insects,” Regulus mumbles under his breath, and James lifts his head and furrows his eyebrows.
“What?”
Regulus rolls his eyes. “My belly is all. Like. Weird and swirly. There are butterflies but I don’t like butter, so I’m going to change the name to stupid fluttery insects,” he explains simply, smiling up at James and blinking slowly.
James goes to speak, but the words get caught in his throat as he stands up straight and tilts his head to look at Regulus. Regulus smiles even wider at him, albeit bouncing on his toes in excitement, and James raises his eyebrows in amusement.
“You are so insanely strange,” James mumbles, shaking his head. “You’re so weird. Why are we dating? I-“
“We’re dating?” Regulus blinks slowly, genuinely feeling confused. They’d never confirmed anything, and they have yet to have a talk about what they are. Regulus, of course, just assumed that he’d ask James when they went on their first date. But he hasn’t asked James on a date yet. “What-“
“I - Regulus ,” James sighs heavily. “What the fuck? We’ve been dating for two weeks-“
“But I didn’t ask you to be my boyfriend yet,” Regulus states, blinking slowly at James. “How does - what? James-“
James cuts him off with a deep sigh and shakes his head, putting his hand on Regulus’ back and slowly guiding him toward the blanket. “Just go sit down, baby,” he mumbles, and Regulus hums, murmuring something under his breath as he kicks his shoes off and lowers himself down into the blanket on the floor.
“Would you care to enlighten me why you’ve brought me to the beach at arse’o’clock in the morning?” Regulus asks, yawning as he lays down on the blanket, planting his feet on the ground so that his knees are up. “It’s cold out here as well, you didn’t bother to tell me to put on a jumper-“
“I brought you one, dickhead,” James snorts, pulling a jumper out of the backpack he brought and handing it to Regulus. Regulus scrunches his nose up, smiling up at him.
“Wow, dickhead,” Regulus hums sarcastically. “What a loving pet name, James. Wonder where you came up with that one,” he snorts, grabbing the jumper from James and slipping it over his head. He watches James settle next to him, holding something out to him with a smile.
“Brought you a poptart,” James says, licking his lips. Regulus watches his mouth, the way his tongue wets his lips. His eyes slowly trail back up to James’ as he attempts to act unaffected by the action. He clears his throat and nicks the poptart out of James’ hand, quickly tearing it open.
“I hope you brought one for yourself because I am not sharing.”
James snorts, shaking his head. “You’re so generous,” he says, his voice high pitched and teasing. Regulus narrows his eyes, taking one of the poptarts out of the pack and albeit tearing into it, pushing his face in front of James’ and chewing dramatically. James sucks his teeth, putting his hand on Regulus’ face and pushing him away with a scowl.
“Oh,” Regulus coos mockingly. “You poor baby. Do you want a piece?” He asks, pouting as he reaches out to stroke James’ cheek. James huffs out a breath and pushes his hand away, then opens his mouth.
“Gimme.”
“If you ask nicely,” Regulus sing-songs, breaking off another piece of his poptart and shoving half of it into his mouth, the other half sticking out from between his teeth. He raises his eyebrow at James, who bats his eyelashes and sighs.
In a split second, James breaks the distance between them and bites the other half of the poptart, making Regulus squeak in surprise and pull away when James grabs it into his mouth. Regulus giggles, covering his mouth so that nothing falls out, and he falls backward onto the blanket. “Baby,” Regulus starts, mouth full of poptart. James hums, crunching a bit on his own bite. “Come look at the stars with me. Please?” He asks, waving him over.
James’ breath hitches a little bit, and Regulus lifts his head in confusion, furrowing his eyebrows at him.
“What?”
“You,” James starts weakly, and Regulus feels a sharp pain behind his ribs, his throat tightening as anxiety settles in his stomach. “You, uh. Remember Halloween? The party?” James asks, his voice scratchy with stress. Regulus nods slowly, waving him over again. He watches as James scoots forward, laying down right next to him, and Regulus wraps an arm around James’ shoulders and pulls him close, prompting James to rest his head on Regulus’ chest.
“Unfortunately,” Regulus mumbles, a bitter taste in his mouth as he tangles a hand in James’ hair, gently scratching at his scalp. Trying to forget Halloween takes a lot of effort. Of course, he doesn’t remember everything. He remembers Jonathan following him around like a lost puppy, losing his friends at the party, and then seeing James snogging Kristina.
The rest of the party is blurred in Regulus’ mind. He remembers getting so pissed that he could barely walk and after that, nothing . The next morning he woke up in his bed and he genuinely has no memory of getting home the night before.
A warm hand underneath his shirt, resting on his stomach brings him back to his own thoughts and he looks down, watching James’ hand under his shirt, drawing circles into his skin. Regulus squirms at the ticklish feeling, kissing the top of James’ head.
“Babe-“
“After you saw us,” James continues, swallowing. Regulus hums, coaxing him to continue. He murmurs it’s okay , against James’ head, and then says I’m listening, sweetheart . “You got really drunk and then you - you were laying on the lawn,” he whispers softly. “And you kept telling me to come look at the stars with you and - and you looked so sad and I just - I -“
“James, darling,” Regulus murmurs, leaning down and kissing his head again. There’s a wave of sadness in his stomach that rolls up to his chest and he wraps his other arm around James, grabbing his wrist with his hand and pulling him close. “It’s not your fault, okay-“
“It literally is, Regulus-“
“But we’re here now,” Regulus says softly, kissing his forehead softly, lips lingering. “Aren’t we? We’re together, on the beach, having a nice cuddle, and listening to the ocean. I’m right next to you, James.”
“But that doesn’t make what I did okay, Regulus.”
Regulus shakes his head and hooks his finger underneath James’ chin, leaning down and pressing his nose against James’. “It doesn’t,” he whispers, and he watches James’ eyes as they search his own. “But that doesn’t mean I can’t forgive you. Good people can do bad things. You can make mistakes, James. Please , make mistakes. Mistakes are human, that’s what makes you human. Please don’t beat yourself up for it, okay, baby?”
James swallows thickly and nods, blinking. It breaks Regulus' heart knowing how much James beats him up for little things. He could drop a glass and cry for three days because he felt like an idiot for it. Regulus wishes that James didn’t hate himself for the little things. He wishes that James could see positives in his mistakes and actually be proud of himself.
James leans up slowly, his eyes fluttering shut and lips parting, and Regulus can only assume that he’s asking for a kiss without saying it. Regulus gives him a small smile and leans in, holding James’ chin between his fingers and pressing a slow, deep kiss against his lips, their mouths slotting together as their heads tilt slightly.
The kiss is slow, sensual, deep, and it makes Regulus’ stomach turn in the best way possible as he cups James’ cheek and pulls him impossibly closer, kissing him so deeply that he swears he can taste James’ heart, feel it in his body.
Then James pulls away with a wet sound, a string of saliva connecting their lips, and there’s cold air on the wet spot on his mouth as James huffs out a small laugh and blinks his eyes open, glossed over and bright.
Their eyes meet, and Regulus sees a sparkle in James’ brown eyes. He almost wants to dive in and stay for awhile, but he opts for stroking his cheek and leaning in to kiss his forehead again. His heart is in his throat and he just feels so, so warm despite the air around them being so cold.
And it’s nice. It really is. Once, he felt cold around James. He didn’t want to be near him, thought that he was obnoxious and loud and the worst person that the universe has ever created. It was funny, actually. The way that winter slowly turned to spring and spring turned to summer as he really got to know him. The way that he swore the ice thawed in his heart and mind when he looked at James.
It’s so nice, he thinks. It’s nice to not be cold all the time. It’s so nice to be warm. To feel warm.
“Can we look at the stars together?” James asks quietly, pressing his head against Regulus’ chest once more.
Regulus smiles softly, nodding and holding his boy close to his chest.
“Of course we can.”
fin.