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2022-05-24
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2024-12-14
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4/?
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Would You Like To Co-Parent With Me?

Chapter 4: "I'd Sooner Slice and Dice Myself Like Jason Voorhees Than Hurt My Baby Boy, But Sure"

Notes:

Finally getting back to this charming little fic! I'm already working on chapter fice, and there will probably only be around seven-ten chapters because I have a thousand mroe projects and I don't want to drag it out too much :3

Chapter Text

Tony was in the kitchen when he heard laughter, but only recognised his youngest son’s voice, so he went up to say hi, expecting to see him with Harry Osborn flustering his youngest, but was shocked a bit to see Harley Keener, another friend of his son’s, a tanned teen who was very handsome, and seemed nice. What made Tony curious was the fact that Harley was blushing at something his son had said to him. 

 

He smiled at Stefan as he asked, turning to face the two, assumedly, boys, “Well? Are you going to introduce your old man to your friend?”

 

Stefan smiled, a grin that his dad knew full well meant he was up to something, but he grabbed Harley’s hand, kissing his cheek, “Lee, sweetheart, this is my dad, Tony. Dad, this is my significant other, Harley Keener.'' 

 

He confidently introduced his dad and his significant other, they had been talking and Harley had come out to him as being genderfluid,  today was a neutral day, so they wanted to use gender neutral pronouns today. Stefan meant to honour those wishes.

 

Tony arched an eyebrow curiously but smiled at them both, “Well, no offense kiddo, I expected to find you here with another…person but as long as you’re happy, son. Nice to see you again, Harley.”

 

Harley smiled at the older brunet, “Nice to see you agaain too, Mr. Stark, your son is a good boyfriend.” they smiled at Stefan warmly, squeezing his hand in theirs.

 

“Well yeah, I did raise him to be a chip off the old block, kid. He’s got my husband in him too, thank god, but still, he’s mostly me.” he grinned, looking proudly at the taller brunet, proud of his son, and that he was in fact, acting like a storybook prince.

 

Stefan rolled his eyes fondly, “Yeah, thank god is right. Imagine if I was just pure Stark? I wouldn’t have any humility or sweetness at all, old man.” he fondly teased his dad.

 

Tony smirked at him, “Watch it, kid, you might be all tall and intimidating like your father now, but I’m still your old man, and that means you’ve still kind of got to do as I say, you little rebel.” he wasn’t being serious at all, he knew Stefan wasn’t either, thankfully.

 

Steve walked into the room, making Tony’s eyes rake up and down the blond’s body, blushing a bit, “Goddamn, Steve…there’s kids here.” he fanned his face with his hand.

 

The blond laughed softly, a deep chuckle, wrapping an arm around the brunet, kissing his temple softly, “I’m glad me in my exercise clothes still has the same effect, darling.” He noticed their oldest son and what he also thought was another boy.

 

Before the question left his lips, Tony elbowed him gently, “Our son and his significant other, Harley.” Tony told him with a smile, he had figured that Stefan wasn’t straight, but he also didn’t know where his son landed on the spectrum of being queer, but he knew that he was definitely fruity.

 

Steve smiled warmly, nodding to Harley, “Nice to meet you, Stefan doesn’t usually bring guest home, especially not such nice ones. Would you like to stay for dinner? I’m making lasagne, with my husband’s help.”

 

Tony poked his ribs playfully, “Yeah, because you need a traditionalist’s eye when you’re cooking one of Italy’s dishes, Captain Handsome.” he snarked. He nodded to Harley and Stefan, “Well, we’ll leave you two young lovebirds alone.”

 

He took Steve by the hand and let him to the kitchen with a grin, talking animatedly to his husband about how he was so happy that their little boy had found someone to share his huge heart, they still had no idea that Peter was dating his blond bestie, but they would that night, and it would probably not be pretty.

 

Speaking of which, he heard the door go, assuming that it was his older brother and Wade. 

Speaking of which, he heard the door go, assuming that it was his older brother and Wade. 

 

He took Harley's hand in his squeezing it gebty, "If that's Pete, we nerd to stick around, sweetheart." Stefan explained. 

 

Harley got up on their tiptoes,  gently pressing their lips to his cheek, "It's okay honey, I get it. You're being an awesome brother, baby." 

 

Stefan squeezed their hand gratefully, "Thanks for understanding, Lee." 

 

They smiled softly, "No problemo, darling."

 

Wade walked in through the front door, opening the door for Peter, smiling at him, "After you, baby-boy." 

 

Peter giggled and walked in, grabbing the blond's outstretched hand, "Thanks, Wadey." He was blushing bright red. 

 

Stefan smiled at his older brother, "Guys, Harley is genderfluid, they're using tbey/them pronouns today." The Southerner had asked him to tell Wade and Peter on his behalf. 

 

Wade grinned, "Fuck, yes! Our friend group is officially all fruity" he excitedly exclaimed. 

 

Peter smiled, "Thanks for letting us know, we'll ask your pronouns from now on.: he promised them. 

 

Harley grinned, wrapping an arm around Stefan, "Not only do I have the best boyfriend, I have amazing friends. Thanks, guys."

 

Stefan wrapped an arm around them too, pressing a soft kiss to their cheek, “Aww, thanks gorgeous.” 

 

Wade squeezed Peter’s hand in his with a small laugh, “Yup, we’re all fruity. Petey-pie is an adorable bi disaster, I’m also a disaster but pansexual, I think Stef is gay, but I’m not sure? And you’re genderfluid...wait, what’s your sexuality?” Wade asked curiously.

 

Harley grinned at Wade, “Nope, my boyfriend is also a bi disaster, he told me yesterday. I’m also pansexual, so cool, nice to meet a fellow pan.” he smiled.

 

Wade used his free hand to offer a fist bump to Harley, “Awesome, us pans have to stick together!” 

 

Peter looked at his younger brother, with a smile, “Welcome to being a bisexual disaster. It stops me wondering why you’d always cuff your jeans.”

 

Stefan laughed loudly, shaking his head at the bad joke, “Oh god, Pete...that was awful! But you’re also not wrong, so yeah, you have your answers.” he grinned.

 

Wade looked between the two brothers, and he knew there was few years between them, but they were so alike. “You guys could be twins, y’know.”

 

Harley snickered, “I don’t think so.” they added, looking at their boyfriend, who was so different to his older brother in ways. Stefan was very flippant, charming, confident and funny whereas Peter was funny yes, but he wasn’t that confident or that flippant, despite how sarcastic and cheeky he could be.

 

Wade smirked at him as he noticed the different statures of the two brothers, which said enough, “You know what, you’re not wrong. They are pretty fucking different. My baby-boy is a lot more reserved that Stef over here.”

 

Stean smirked back at him when Wade smirked at Harley, like many people, the blond was probably assuming that he called the shots, when he really didn’t.

 

Steve heard Peter’s voice and murmured to Tony, “Both our boys are home, darling.” He happened to hear Wade’s voice, and how it referred to Peter as ‘his baby-boy' with his serum increased hearing and he knew his husband would have a conniption if he so much as thought their oldest was dating the loudmouthed blond. 

 

He grabbed Tony’s face, tipping his head back for a deep, breath-catching kiss before pulling away to whisper, “I’m telling you right now, if you have patience and not freak out too much about who Peter brought home, I’ll use my tongue on you in an entirely different context, babydoll, if you catch my meaning?” Steve promised him, he wasn’t the innocent little hero people assumed him to be back when he was actively being Captain America.

 

The shield was in good hands with Sam Wilson and his husband, Bucky who had adopted twin daughters, who they were happy with. 

 

Tony was dazed, like he always was when one of those rare, head tipping kisses was doled upon him, he always got a little dizzy at them. 

 

“Jesus, Steve... Those are dangerous, il mio caro.” Tony just about breathed out and only then his words sunk in. He pouted and groused a little, “Him dating Wilson is inevitable, but I don’t have to like it.”

 

Steve smirked at him a little, pressing a tender kiss to his forehead, “Oh, I know, honey. And good, they are inevitable, love can’t be chosen, Tony. You know that better than anyone, baby.”

 

Tony smiled warmly at him, pressing a soft kiss to his shoulder, “Yeah, I understand, il mio amore.” He took his hand and squeezed it, “But with you at my side? Pfft, easy.” Tony smiled.

 

 

 

In the living room, Peter looked at his brother sheepishly, as he asked, “Will you help us talk to dad? He, for some reason, hates Wade?” He was genuinely confused as to why his dad hated the blond.

 

Stefan reached out, putting a hand on his brother's shoulder, “Don't worry Pete, it'll be a-okay, he’s just protective of you, that’s all.” 

 

Wade fidgeted, looking nervous for once instead of looking like an energetic golden retriever puppy, “How?”

 

Stefan grinned at him slyly, “My old man has soft spots. I love my brother dearly, but unfortunately I'm the favourite kid, I put in a good word for you and you'll be fine.” Stefan assured them, knowing it was true but hating it anyways. He thought Peter was smarter and more capable than him, but that’s just how things were, he was the favourite kid, in Tony’s book anyways.

 

Harley grinned at him, their arm snaking around him, gently kissing his cheek, “You're so smart, darlin’.”

 

Stefan blushed a little, grinning, “Thanks, gorgeous.” He kissed their cheek in return and looked to his brother, “Let's go?”

 

Peter nodded, grabbing Wade's hand, “Right behind you, Stef.”

 

They bravely headed into the kitchen, both couples holding hands and not caring if Stefan and Peter’s parents saw them.

 

Stefan walked up to Tony with a boyish grin, doling out the Stark charm that TTony himself had taught him, but he didn’t have to use it up until now. He looked over to Peter with a grin.

 

“Hey dad, I have something to tell you, do you have a sec?” Stefan asked, looking at his dad warmly, his brown eyes boring into Tony’s matching set of brown eyes.

 

Tony, in fact, did have a soft spot for his eldest son, maybe it’s because he was biologically his, but he didn’t bother hding it, not that he didn’t adore Peter, he adored his spider boy, but Harley? That was his pride and joy. He looked at him with pride, “Of course, kid. What’s up?”

 

Stefan looked over to Peter, “Peter happened to find a boyfriend for himself, and I don’t want you to freak out, but it’s Wade. He’s a good guy, just get to know him, okay? He treats better than a prince, trust me, dad.” Stefan assured his dad with a debonair smile the inventor had taught him.

 

Tony sighed as he ran a hand down his stubble strewn face, “You’re using my own lessons against me, kid...but you’re not wrong. Wilson isn’t my best choice for Pete, but if he’s happy, he’s happy.” he explained, grumbling a little bit.

 

Stefan grinned at him, hugging his dad close as he replied, “Just give him a chance, dad. We all deserve chances, don’t we?” he asked, looking directly at his other dad, Steve, who always believed in justice and second chances.

 

“You’re smart, you little shit. But you’re right, second chances are important.” Tony answered him, ruffling his hair and smirking a little, “You did your duty as a big brother and faced your old man for Pete, huh?”

 

Stefan sheepishly smiled as he answered Tony, “Maybe...but hey, if I did, I did. Anyways, I’ll let you get back to making dinner with pops. We’re all going upstairs until dinner is ready, I wanted to show Harls my latest blueprints.”

 

Tony nodded but smirked a little, calling after them, “Doors open, both of you!”

 

Peter, surprisingly looked at him with a grin, “I don’t think you want to hear our conversations, dad.”

 

Tony thought for a second and sighed, “You’re right, of course, spider boy. Don’t have too much fun, okay?” he added, specifically to Wade, “Wilson, hurt my son, and I’ll end you, got me?”

 

Wade grinned victoriously at getting the green light to date his sweet science nerd boyfriend, not thtat he needed it, he’d date Peter with permission from his parents or not, but it was nice. “I’d rather slice and dice myself like Jason Voorhees than hurt a hair on my baby boy’s head, but sure.”

 

Tony rolled his eyes and watched the quartet walk off laughing and joking, he was proud of his sons, they were adults now, and soon, summers would blend into summers, years into years.

Notes:

This is my first Steve/Tony or rather, Superfamily fic but I really like the dynamic and I've read a whole bunch of these this week, so why not? Below are translations.

la mia bella piccola principessa - my beatuiful little princess -
il mio prediletto - my darling
il mio amore - my love
девочка - little girl