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As a leader (or, well, former leader), it was Takashi Shirogane's job to be observant.
One act of ignorance could cost someone their life on the battlefield. This was common knowledge for any self respecting soldier. If you want to live, keep your eyes open. This includes around your teammates. Making sure your team stays sharp means ensuring the life of both them and you.
So, naturally, he noticed things. Which was important considering how long he'd been gone, he had a lot to catch up on.
Lance was far more mature, even if he was still just as goofy as he remembered him. Hunk was far more suited to being a paladin now, far more adaptable and able to push forward. Pidge's early potential, which was already great as it was, had grown, turning her into a capable young woman. And Keith had become a leader, become far more responsible even if there were miles left to go, even if there was still work left to be done. All of them were far more tired, though. The looks on their faces reminded them of the soldiers he'd seen stumble back from battle back at the Garrison, weary and having seen things no man should be subjected to, with scars that still ache months later.
And if there was one thing Shiro was guilty about, it was that some of those scars were from him.
Well, not him. From someone made to look like him, act like him, torment the family he'd somehow held together despite the war raging on outside their doorstep. They'd almost died , and this twisted image of him had done nothing but gloat over it.
And there was one of them that had been far more shaken by it than any of the rest, maybe even more than the former leader himself.
Keith. His brother.
He hated the fact he could remember the battle. He hated watching, watching helplessly as his clone had deceived him, watching as he'd learned the truth, watched his horrified expression, and, of course…the fight.
He'd hated every stinging remark, every taunt, every pained expression, all of it.
Keith said he was fine. Maybe the others would've believed him months ago. But he knew he wasn't the only one concerned, that he wasn't the only one who realized something was wrong. So very wrong. Now that the others had seen him lower his shield ever so slightly, they knew what it looked like for it to be put back up. He'd seen the concerned looks, them clearly debating whether he needed space or to be comforted.
And the worst part was that Shiro knew who was responsible for it.
Before his death, Keith had been comfortable around him, far more than he was around the others. He'd let out a sigh of relief whenever the others left, let his shoulders slump ever so slightly, and bit by bit he'd begun to open up. And even after the initial death, he'd started to heal.
But then he'd taken his place. He had his memories, had them be forced into his brain, knew exactly what to say to make Keith trust him. Keith, who was already desperate to believe he was still out there, desperate to pretend he wasn't dead off in the middle of space. Of course the kid latched onto the first remnant of Shiro that he could, he was grieving and lonely, and didn't know how to move on. And Kuron, or whatever the witch had named him, had taken full advantage of him and used him.
And the effects were still there. Even if he claimed they weren't.
Because Keith was different now.
He never used to flinch when he reached out to touch him. He hadn't been afraid of him for years now.
What had he done?
There was a scar on his face, from the man with his face. Of course he was afraid of him.
Not that Keith was being cold to him in any sense of the word, he always checked up on him, always stayed by his side, always sent Kosmo to watch over him, but he'd jump whenever he made too sudden of a movement, and then look instantly guilty. As if any of this was his fault.
He'd tried to bring it up a few times, but he'd always been dismissed before he could really get anywhere.
A week or so after he'd come back, he'd decided he had to do something about this. This was just going to get worse and worse if he never brought it up, and he didn't think he could take losing his brother.
He found him after dinner. He was outside the lions, sitting around the campfire and petting his wolf carefully. Shiro couldn't hold back a smile. He always forgot how much the kid was a dog person.
The smile dropped when he saw the look on his face. It didn't take a genius to figure out something was wrong, with how tense he looked, like he was waiting for something to go wrong. It was understandable given the circumstances, but was no less concerning.
"Hey Keith, can I talk to you for a minute?"
The brunette looked surprised, before putting on his usual poker face. "Yeah sure, what's up?" He briefly stopped petting Kosmo, who whined softly at this. The former black paladin couldn't stop himself from giving the canine a scratch behind the ears as he sat down.
"I just wanted to apologize to you. I've given you a lot of grief lately."
The other immediately narrowed his eyes at that. "Really, none of that was your fault. It was his. All of us know you'd never do that." Even saying that, he couldn't help but notice how much smaller he looked.
"Keith, you've been flinching away from me for the past few days."
Unfortunately, this only made the younger man avoid his eyes, turning away from him.
"Listen, I'm sorry. He just looked like you, and-"
"Don't you dare." He interrupted. "If any of the others had someone close to them cloned, and ended up attacking them, would you blame them for being hurt by it? Would you judge them?"
They let out a sigh. "That's different."
"How?"
The paladin resumed petting Kosmo, seemingly looking for something to do with his hands, to keep himself calm. "I should've known it wasn't you. The others haven't known you as long as I have, if I had just- stayed , instead of running away like a coward, maybe I would've noticed quicker, and maybe none of this would've happened. Hell, I'd known something was up, I just avoided the problem instead of admitting it, and if I hadn't, maybe the Castle would still be here, maybe-"
"You were scared." He cut in. Before Keith could say anything, he continued "You didn't want to lose me, and you thought joining the Blade would solve your problems. I can't blame you for that, Keith. None of us can. None of us blame you."
They clenched their fists, still refusing to let him see his face. "Really, I'm fine. What don't you get about it? I'm okay."
He sighed. "Listen, I just…have I been making you uncomfortable?"
The other stiffened, "No. Again, I'm fine."
"You don't have to lie to me, Keith. You're allowed to be upset about this. If you need space, I can-"
"No!"
Shiro blinked, as Keith took a deep breath to steady himself.
"I don't want you to leave. I don't. It's just that he…" He paused, seeming to look for the right words.
"You don't have to talk about it if you don't want to. I'm not forcing you to do anything. Just know that if there's something on your mind, I'm here."
He seemed to consider this for a moment, before speaking. "He told me he should've given up on me. He told me my parents were right to leave. And I knew you weren't you, I knew they must've done something to you from all the weird bodies, but I…I can't stop imagining it was you." He then gestured at the scar. "And, well, this isn't helping."
Guilt and shame gnawed at his stomach at that. "I don't believe any of what he said. He couldn't have been more wrong."
"I know that."
"I'm being serious. You're one of the strongest people I've met. You didn't deserve any of the shit with your parents, and I'm so, so sorry if I've ever made you feel like you did. He was wrong, Keith. And I'll say it as many times as you need to hear it. If there's ever anything, anything at all, I can do to help you believe that, I'll do it in an instant. All you have to do is ask."
He finally turned to look at him, fidgeting slightly. His posture had relaxed a small bit, a very small bit, but it would have to do for now. "Thanks. Just don't go getting yourself cloned again, and we're good."
Shiro couldn't help but chuckle ever so slightly at that. Of course he'd be sarcastic at a time like this. "I'll do my best." He sobered up again after another thought crossed his mind. "And, I'm sorry I couldn't come back to you sooner. I should've done more to warn you, and-"
"Are you serious?"
"What?"
"Are you apologizing for dying? " He was staring at him like he was crazy, a look usually reserved for the others.
"Not that exactly, but I could've tried to contact Lance more, I could've tried to find a way to get to you, or interfered faster in the fight, or-"
"So let me get this straight, it's not my fault that I couldn't tell the guy I've known for years was replaced by an imposter, but it's your fault you had trouble coming back from the dead?" His voice raised steadily as he spoke, glaring at him as intensely as he could manage. "How hypocritical are you? You could've died! You could've died, you would've died, I don't-" He took a breath. "I don't get you, Shiro."
He paused, considering him for a moment. "Still, it was my job to protect you. I failed."
"You saved my life!"
"After I endangered it."
The other looked very tired all of a sudden, pinching his nose. "It wasn't your fault, Shiro. I don't blame you."
The words shouldn't be reassuring, he wasn't the one that was supposed to be being comforted, he was the leader (at least, he used to be), and he was the one who was supposed to have it together, but…he supposed that question had been nagging away at him ever since he got back. The wonder if Keith would ever be able to trust him again, if Kuron had destroyed their bond for good, if he'd lost even more of his family- and if it was permanent.
"..Thanks. Same to you, you couldn't have known what would happen. And thank you, for everything."
Keith gave a soft smile at that, and held Kosmo a little closer. "I should be the one thanking you. For the record, I meant what I said."
Shiro raised a brow, and Keith continued.
"You're my brother, Shiro. I love you."
Hesitantly, Shiro reached out to place a hand on his shoulder. They nodded.
"Love you too, Keith. I'll uh, try not to die again anytime soon."
Keith snorted. "You better not. Allura can't revive you every five seconds."
"You wanna go out looking for food? I don't think I'll be able to stay in camp another minute."
They rolled their eyes, sitting up, even as Kosmo yipped in protest. "Sure, why not? We've got a lot to catch you up on."
As he sat up, he knew it would take a while before Keith was fully comfortable around him again. Kuron had done serious damage, and that wouldn't be fixed overnight. But he was willing to wait. He was willing to put the effort in.
He wasn't going to leave his family behind ever again.