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The thing is that San’s never had sex before. It’s not a fact he likes to think about a lot, because it’s embarrassing. He’s grown! He’s sexy! Literally everyone tells him so! But he’s also feels like a huge virgin, in the worst way. Whenever any of the other members allude or just directly talk about sex, he gets so squirmy and always finds a way to leave or change the topic. It just seems so scary and intimidating, and the things he sees online or the way people talk to him sometimes doesn’t help. San knows he has pretty defined abs now, and he’s learned to use his hips but that was for dancing! Just for dancing.
Being a virgin is pretty humiliating and terrible but the worse thing is that San’s never really figured out how to get off. He’s tried, so many times. Every once in a while, he does manage to have an orgasm, but those times are few and far between and he can never figure out how to actually make it happen. It takes him forever to get hard even though he’s horny, and then by that point it’s late enough that half the time it isn’t even worth the effort. The other half he does actually manage to get erect but what is he supposed to do at that point? He touches himself, but it usually feels weird and not that great.
San has to be doing something wrong, because there’s no way that this is the experience everyone else has been raving about. Sex has to be more complicated that jerking off, and getting off is already so difficult that San doesn’t know how anyone actually enjoys themselves. Still, he tries. Masturbation is a thing that people do, and presumably it’s something they do before they have sex with another person. So, he should master that before he tries to figure out how to convince someone to have sex with him. He usually tries to wait until it’s late enough at night that Yunho is asleep, but today is a lucky day where he has the dorm to himself. Everyone else is off doing their own thing, so it’s just San alone in the dorm.
Carefully, San draws the curtain in his room and dims the lights. He managed to find some candles in one of Seonghwa’s drawers that smell pretty good, and he has one of those burning. He made sure to place it on a clearing on a table, away from anything flammable and in a very stable position. San can’t imagine anything worse than managing to burn down the dorm while he tries to teach himself how to have a purposeful orgasm. He strips down, feeling a little silly as he does so but if he can’t be fully naked now though then when can he. It’s warm enough in their dorm that he doesn’t need to worry about blankets or anything else to keep warm.
He lies down on his bed. The texture of his blankets against all of his bare skin feels kind of weird, but also kind of nice? He has one of those extra plush, fuzzy blankets right on top and he loves to snuggle with it so it makes sense that it would feel nice all over. San’s just never put those things together.
He shifts a little bit, luxuriating in the softness against his back, his legs, his…ass.
San gulps. Enough of that, he still has the main show to get to. San grabs his dick, still lying soft against his thigh. He closes his eyes tightly, trying to think of something that’s sexy. Those girls at their latest music show, with their short skirts and low-cut tops and cute giggles come to mind. Wooyoung had flirted with one of them for a while during one of their down times that day, hands flitting about and almost touching the girl’s waist while he leaned down to talk to her. Wooyoung had looked particularly good that day, San remembers, with his hair upswept and these delicate silver necklaces that shined against his golden skin.
He gives a tentative little tug to his cock, coaxing it along as he starts to get hard. San stays with the scenario, remembering how cocky Wooyoung had looked when he had got one of them to blush and hide behind her hands. Yeosang had been sitting beside him, he remembers. Fuck he had looked good too, in these new shirts the stylists were giving him that emphasized the cut of his arms. Yeosang has such a pretty face he could never look bad, but this new direction is just something else.
San strokes his cock a little harder, speeding up the pace. He can feel sparks building in his lower stomach as he envisions the scene and he’s desperate to chase them. Little grunts and pants leave him as he tries to reach his peak and just as he thinks he might get there, thinking of the sharpness of Wooyoung’s grin and the softness of Yeosang’s hair, everything just fizzles.
San groans, frustrated beyond belief. Nearly every time he does this there’s always a point where he can feel the orgasm within reach and then at the last minute it just dies out. He’s still hard, still horny as fuck but he just can’t figure out the last step that will let him actually cum.
“What are you doing?”
San’s head snaps to the door, eyes wide open. Yeosang’s standing in the door to the room, shifting a little in place awkwardly. “W-what are you doing here? Weren’t you out with Wooyoung?” Hurriedly, San scrambles to sit up, aware that he’s spread eagle and naked. He flails a hand around for a pillow to put in his lap, and grabs the first soft thing that he finds. He stuffs it down, doing his best to hide his erection, which has unhelpfully not flagged at all. Just another example of his dick working against him.
“I decided to stay home and have a nap instead,” Yeosang says, slowly. “I thought Wooyoung would have told you. And then I woke up and heard these weird noises so I came to see if you were okay.”
San flushes. Weird noises. Does he sound weird when he gets off? Has Yeosang managed to uncover an insecurity that he didn’t even know he had?
“I meant more pained,” Yeosang goes on, “I’m also pretty sure you’re not supposed to hold onto your dick that hard when you jerk off.” He takes a step into the room, closing the door behind him. “And I didn’t really look that closely, but did you use lube? You’re going to chafe from rubbing it that hard with just precum.”
More things that San is doing wrong. He whines a little, embarrassed. Maybe this explains why he can’t consistently have orgasms.
Yeosang steps a little closer. “Are you okay? I’m sorry I interrupted—I really was just concerned.”
“I—I’m just a little frustrated,” San starts, pouting a little and avoiding Yeosang’s eyes. “I’m really bad at jerking off, and I don’t really get why and everyone makes sex seem so easy and this is like, sex light so I really should be able to get it right, but I just can’t! I don’t know why! And now I have to worry about sounding weird too? What am I going to do?” San clenches his fists a little, feeling the soft fabric distend slightly with the force of his hands.
“I—I’m sorry?” Yeosang offers, “I didn’t mean that about you sounding weird, it just really seemed like what you were doing was painful and I could tell from outside the room.” He shuffles a tiny bit closer, obviously thinking hard about something. “Did you want me to help?” Yeosang finally offers.
“Help?” San asks, confused.
“Yeah, I actually had sort of similar issues at one point so I could probably help you.”
“That wouldn’t be weird?”
“No way!” Yeosang says, “and even if it was, if it helps you and makes you feel better than it doesn’t matter.” He’s firm about this, tone leaving no room for second guessing. It’s comforting to San.
“Okay,” he says, “then I’d really like you to help me Yeosangie.”
Yeosang beams. “I think you have the right idea there with Shiber, so maybe we’ll start there.
“Shiber?” San says, confused. He looks down at his lap, where he can feel that his erection has not faded in the slightest. There, covering his dick, is his beloved stuffed Shibu Inu. He thought that it felt too soft to be his regular pillow. San’s distracted by the incoming freak out by Yeosang sitting on the edge of the bed and holding out one of his hands.
“Can I?” he asks, wiggling his fingers a little bit.
San nods, a little too overwhelmed with information for words right now. Deftly, Yeosang plucks Shiber up from San’s lap. “I’m surprised you use Shiber for this,” he says, conversational as he strokes Shiber’s head. “Actually, it’s probably best if you turn over.”
San feels dizzy right now, doing his best to work through what is happening. He flips onto his hands and knees, careful not to bump into Yeosang.
“Mmmmh, that’s good but maybe go on your elbows?” Yeosang trails light fingers down from San’s shoulder blade to the jut of his elbow, a light physical cue to prompts San to bend until he’s hovering in a plank. “Oh perfect!” Yeosang chirps. He’s very purposeful as he places Shiber back down on the bed, right below where San’s hips are hovering.
“W-what now?” San croaks out. He’s thankful again for the increase in ab workouts he’s been doing. Maybe they aren’t just for dancing.
“Now you lower your hips,” Yeosang says, giving a light tap to San’s butt.
San does as he’s told, gingerly lowering down. Shiber’s soft, microfibre fur feels just as good against his cock this way as it did when he was holding it in his lap, and he has to sigh at the sensation.
“Oh! I didn’t think you could hold a plank like that,” Yeosang says, wonder evident in his tone. It amazes San that he can be so cute, even in this situation. “But that’s not quite what I meant. I can touch you more, right?”
“Y-yeah,” San says. He’s committed now, right?
Yeosang climbs up in between San’s legs, gently nudging them apart to make room for himself. He taps on the backs of San’s knees. “That’s it,” he says, as San slowly lowers them until they hit the bed. This pose reminds him a bit of the frog stretch that he hates doing before dance practices, though the addition of Shiber’s softness against his cock makes it far more pleasant.
“Feels nice, right?” Yeosang asks. He trails his fingers up the back of San’s thighs as he talks, and the barest hint of sensation they provide is driving San crazy. “Now you grind your hips down.”
San does so, letting his head drop down so he can look down his body and watch how Shiber’s cute little face distends slightly from the pressure.
“Woah woah,” Yeosang says, grabbing onto San’s hips with enough force to still them. “Okay I think I understand the issue a bit better now.” His hands drop down so he can get a better grip on San’s hipbones. “You’re so forceful Sannie. And sometimes that’s good, but sometimes,” Yeosang draws San’s hips up until he’s barely touching Shiber, “you need to be delicate.” Yeosang moves San’s hips down and forward the slightest bit, so that he’s just barely grazing the microfibre fur. “Need to work yourself up a little, even when it’s just you.”
San can feel the little puffs of air from Yeosang speaking along his back, matching the barely there brushes of Shiber along his cock and contrasting with the heaviness of Yeosang’s hands on his hips. He moans, feeling a little helpless at the combination of sensations and the visual of Yeosang’s hands around his hips.
“Take your time, Sannie. Let it build up here.” Yeosang moves one of his hands to cup San’s lower belly, applying gentle pressure. “Then you can go a little harder.” Yeosang releases some of the pressure in his hands, letting San take over most of the movement. San tries hard to keep Yeosang’s instructions in mind, letting his hips rut down a little harder but still keeping the movement far lighter than he had before. It does feel nicer that way, and he has to wonder if that’s been the issue all along.
“It also helps if you make things wetter,” Yeosang says, interrupting San’s train of thought. “Do you have lube?”
San shakes his head, whining a little. Words feel so far away right now so he can only hope that Yeosang understands what he means.
Yeosang tuts, and then leaves the bed to cross the room to Yunho’s bedside table. He rummages around in the drawers for a moment before making a noise of triumph. “Can I put it on you?”
San whines again, rutting down against Shiber more forcefully. His skin feels too tight, and all he wants is for Yeosang’s pretty hands to touch him.
“Words San-ah,” Yeosang says, settling back in his spot between San’s spread legs.
It takes a moment for San to gather them amongst the wool in his head, but the words do eventually come. “Please,” he starts, forcing them out past a tongue that suddenly feels thick in his mouth, “please touch me. Wanna feel good.”
“So good,” Yeosang says, smiling, “raise up for me then.”
San lifts his hips obediently. When he looks down his body again, he can see that Shiber is slightly misshapen from the repetitive movement, and little beads of precum are matted into his fur. He shivers and then yelps when Yeosang fists his cock, his hand cool and slick with lube.
“Alright try again,” Yeosang says, apparently satisfied with how slick San is. Slowly, San lowers his hips again keeping Yeosang’s previous advice in mind. He’s delicate as he grinds against Shiber, the extra slide of the lube contrasting with the catch of soft fur. When he looks again, he can see how the tip of his cock slides up against Shiber’s soft white cheek leaving behind pearls of precum and lube on his stitched black whiskers.
“Is that better?” Yeosang asks. “You sound better, well actually you sound pretty San-ah. Look so pretty too humping your stuffie like that.” He palms San’s ass the slightest bit as he says it, and just like that the slowly building coil in San’s stomach snaps. He moans, long and reedy, hiding his face into the pillow as he ruts down harder to chase every last bit of his orgasm.
Slowly, his hips come to a stop and San lies there, panting, as he takes stock of what just happened. An orgasm, a real one, that didn’t take him forty-five minutes to build up to. It might as well be a miracle. He flips over to his back, beaming up at Yeosang.
“Thank you!” San says, “That was probably the easiest, best orgasm I’ve ever had.” He flushes a little once the words have left his mouth. Maybe that’s a bit too honest for the situation, but it’s the truth.
Yeosang giggles, the super cute one that always reminds San a little bit of a cartoon character. “Of course! Any time.” Then he shifts a little, legs re-arranging themselves on the bed like Yeosang is uncomfortable.
Honestly, San didn’t mean to look. The movement catches his attention though and when he tracks down Yeosang’s body to where he’s still kneeling at the end of the bed, well. San’s breath catches in his throat. Yeosang is so hard, tenting the loose pants he’s wearing in such an obvious way.
“You…is that because of me?” Sans asks. He feels a little like he’s suffered a knock to the head, just staring at Yeosang with wide eyes as he processes.
Yeosang blushes, all the way up to his hairline and down past the collar of his shirt. “Sorry,” he says, hands fidgeting in his lap as if to hide away his erection, “I didn’t mean to. You just sounded so nice.”
Now San’s the one blushing and fidgeting with his hands. That only draws attention to the fact that he’s naked, which makes the blushing and fidgeting worse. A constant feedback loop of humiliation and horniness.
“I’m going to go,” Yeosang says, unfolding from kneeling so he can get off the bed. San’s hand shoots out, grabbing onto Yeosang’s wrist.
“Wait,” he says, a little burst of bravery breaking through the momentary embarrassment. “What if I helped you?”
Yeosang stares at San, one foot off of the bed. “I don’t want to pressure you,” he says, softly. “Or have you do something you aren’t ready for.”
“No!” San says. He tugs on Yeosang’s wrist, trying to cajole him back onto the bed properly. “I’d like to. I mean, if you want of course.” Honestly, he doesn’t really know what exactly he’s asking for other than returning the favour. It would feel way worse to let Yeosang just walk off though. He also just wants to see if Yeosang would sound nice too, if he’d look even prettier during his own orgasm. San shivers a little just thinking about it.
Yeosang doesn’t resettle onto the bed, but he does turn to face San fully. “I’d like that too,” he says, voice a little deeper and raspier than San remembers. It’s almost like the voice Yeosang has when he first wakes up, though he doesn’t get to hear it that often. “Do you want to try touching me with your hands? That might be a nice way for you to practice being gentle.”
San flushes, the reminder of his own ineptitude burning him up. Yeosang is the one gaining strength and muscles in leaps and bounds and here he is having to coach San on how to be gentle, and touch himself the right way.
“Or maybe something else?” Yeosang asks, interpreting San’s silence as reluctance. “Oh! Maybe this would work? If you’re tired.” He stands up properly, shedding clothes his clothes quickly. Like a true boy he leaves them piled up on the floor, but it’s not like San is that much better when he’s busy and tired. He’ll get them later anyways.
The loss of Yeosang’s clothes make it clear how much time he’s been putting in at the gym lately, muscle definition starting to become apparent in a way that has San’s mouth watering a little. He doesn’t remember Yeosang looking like this when they’ve done quick changes in the dressing room, but then again Yeosang wasn’t hard and leaking precum onto his stomach then either.
San swallows, mouth suddenly dry and parched. Good thing too, because he lets out a mortifying squeak when Yeosang climbs back onto the bed. “What are you doing?” he asks, shuffling over. Yeosang seems to be looking for something, hands roaming around in the bedding.
“Lube,” Yeosang replies, making a noise of triumph when he unearths it. How he manages to look so sweet and innocent while holding a bottle of lube, having just taught San how to hump his stuffie is a mystery. “I remembered one of the other trainees back at Bighit liked to do this with me. It felt really nice, especially when I was too tired after practice to really help out.”
“Okay,” San says, drawing out the sound, “that still doesn’t really explain what it is?” He’s ignoring any thought or implication of Yeosang being touched like this way back when, doing his best not to think about all the boys he knows trained with Yeosang.
“Oh sorry,” Yeosang says, ducking his head a little. God he’s so cute, San kind of wants to eat him. “I thought that I might fuck your thighs. If that’s okay?”
The words rattle around San’s head, bouncing around a mind suddenly blank from any other thoughts. Fuck his thighs. Yeosang wants to fuck his thighs.
Yeosang must take San’s silence as uncomfortableness, because he starts to wave his hands around frantically. “I mean, we don’t have to! It was just an idea, cause it feels really good and you have such nice thighs, so I thought it would be even better. And maybe not as overwhelming? But…” Yeosang trails off with a little nervous giggle.
It takes San a moment to parse though all of that, getting stuck on the compliment before finally getting through it all. “No!” he says, a sudden wave of worry crashing over him. “No, I’d like that. I just. Well, I didn’t know that was a thing? I was just trying to picture it.” San reaches over and grasps Yeosang’s hands, grip awkward around the hand still gripping the bottle of lube. “I trust your judgement here. You’ll just need to guide me…again.”
The eye contact and smile Yeosang bestows San after his little speech is nothing short of blinding. It can’t be good to feel quite so dazed all the time, but maybe this is the power of a real orgasm. Honestly, San doesn’t know how other people get anything done if they feel like this on a regular basis.
“I’ll take care of you,” Yeosang says, earnest and sweet. Gently, he untangles his hands from San’s, reaching to run the very tips of his fingers along the outside of San’s knee and up his thigh. “You should turn around, so you’re lying on your side.”
Instructions given, there’s nothing left for San to do but follow them. It’s nerve-wracking, lying there nude and not being able to see what Yeosang is doing. San takes deep, slow breaths to keep that anxiety at bay. It’s just Yeosang after all, and if he can’t trust him now then San probably won’t ever be able to. Still, the first touch of Yeosang’s hand to San’s outer thigh makes him jump a little.
“Shhhhh,” Yeosang soothes, “just relax for me Sannie. Let it feel good.” His fingers walk along the curve of San’s thigh, moving inwards. One lone fingertip traces from the tip of San’s cock to the base of his hips.
San whines, hips moving to try to chase the sensation.
“Here,” Yeosang says, hand retreating to rummage around behind San. “You can have this to help you.” A soft little thump sounds as Yeosang drops something down in front of San. Then Yeosang retreats back behind San, the click of the lube bottle as loud as fireworks in the quiet of the bedroom. Slowly, San looks down, curious about what Yeosang meant exactly. Immediately, his face flames with heat. Shiber’s little cum-stained face stares up at him, somehow baleful.
“I’m going to slick up your thighs,” Yeosang says, interrupting San’s embarrassed staring contest with Shiber. “Don’t be afraid to use your plushie.” His hands are gentle as he lifts San’s top leg up, running slick fingers up along his inner thighs.
The shiver that runs up San’s back is reflexive, a reaction to being touched in such a vulnerable way. Yeosang’s fingers are so delicate too, just ghosting along with hints of sensation. It’s almost weird, but it feels good too.
“Are you ready?” Yeosang asks, snuggling up tight to San’s back as he speaks. He’s still holding San’s leg up as he moves, this long line of heat against San. He can feel Yeosang’s breath, hot against the back of his neck and that makes him shiver again. It’s different though, the movement almost resonating against Yeosang’s chest.
“Yeah.” The word comes out as croak, getting stuck in San’s throat a couple times before he finally gets it out. He reaches out for Shiber as Yeosang adjust his grip, rocking San’s leg and hips slightly. It is comforting to feel Shiber’s soft fur, to clutch at his little body. And if he holds him close to his cock, just beginning to harden again, well only Yeosang would know.
Once Yeosang is satisfied with how he’s moved San around, he scoots in even closer until he’s fully plastered along San’s back. Slowly, he lower San’s leg back down, making little last-minute adjustments before finally sliding his cock in between San’s legs.
“Can you squeeze your thighs together Sannie?” Yeosang gives one small thrust of his hips, wrapping a hand around San’s hip to anchor himself.
San squeezes his thighs together, grip on Shiber also tightening. He feels like he’s boiling from the inside out, the heat of Yeosang around him making him burn up faster. Yeosang rocks his hips again, and San’s move too despite the firm hold Yeosang has on him. It bumps San’s cock into Shiber again, soft fur like velvet against his overheating skin.
“Feels good,” Yeosang says, voice tight and breathy.
San nods along helplessly. He wasn’t sure how good it would feel, his inner thighs not striking him as being particularly sensitive. He was wrong though, because every time Yeosang drives his hips forward, cock fucking forward between his slicked-up thighs, San feels it all the way down to his toes. It’s not a strong sensation sure, but just like with touching his own cock the fact that it’s more delicate is working out for San. Yeosang’s hand on his hips burns, his little whimpers and the heat of his breath on the back of San’s neck all combining together into a big knot of pleasure forming in the pit of his stomach.
“Shiber helping you?”
Yeosang’s words draw San’s attention back down to where he’s still clutching Shiber tightly. On the next rock forward of their hips, San grinds Shiber back against his cock, moaning at the sensation.
“Am I helping you fuck your plushie?” Yeosang breathes the word right into San’s ear, tongue darting out to flutter along the outer shell.
“Y-yeah,” San whimpers. The words make it seem a little shameful, but Yeosang’s tone is so proud that he can’t feel any sting from them. “I like it so much, Sangie. Feels so nice, you feel so good.”
The next thrust of Yeosang’s hips is harder, hips slapping against San’s ass. He presses wet kisses down from San’s ear, along his neck and shoulder, muffling his groans into the skin there. “Are you going to come on your plushie again?”
“Ohhhh.” San grinds up into Shiber, fucking up into the soft fur and messing up the rhythm that Yeosang had.
Immediately, Yeosang tightens his grip on San’s hip and hauls him back. “Easy Sannie, don’t get carried away.” His hips fuck faster, the squelch of the lube between San’s thighs becoming deafening. It’s all so much, too much sensation and new experiences for San to keep track of everything that’s happening.
“I’m going to—I’m. Ohhhh,” San moans, hips squirming helplessly in Yeosang’s grip. Frantically, he stuffs Shiber hard against his cock, trying to make the little coil of pleasure in his stomach finally snap.
“So tight, San-ah.” Yeosang grunts as his thrusts lose their rhythm, becoming erratic. The hand holding San’s waist moves around until he’s clutching at San’s stomach. “Just—just a little more, please.”
San squeezes his legs together, writhing between Yeosang’s hard body and Shiber’s soft one. He’s so close, just needs one last thing to finally push him into his orgasm. It’s almost like Yeosang can hear that thought, because in the next moment he bites down hard on the sensitive skin between San’s neck and shoulder. Just like that, it’s all over for San. He moans and whimpers his way through his orgasm, shaking all over in Yeosang’s arms.
It takes a while for San to really get back to himself, this second orgasm taking it’s time moving through him. He peels his eyes open, not even really sure when he closed them. Yeosang has detached from his shoulder, just nuzzling into the crook of his neck. His arms are still tight around San’s waist, holding him close.
“Are you back?” Yeosang asks. His thumb is stroking lightly against the skin just above San’s belly button, sensation so light it tickles.
San shivers. He’s hyperaware of his body, the places where his skin feels sticky and tacky, every place where Yeosang is touching him, the roughness of the bed. “Yeah,” he croaks. His throat feels sort of scratchy, and he blushes when he thinks about why that might be. “Did you…” San trails off, suddenly too shy to finish his thought.
“Mmmh,” Yeosang hums, “I came basically as soon as you did, felt so good with you shaking for me.”
It’s silly to be embarrassed, San knows that. Yeosang has helped through two orgasms in short succession, heard him make a fool of himself directly before hand, and he’s been so sweet and kind throughout all of it. Still, he can’t quite shake the embarrassment.
“What do we do now?” San asks. He wants to bury down further into Yeosang’s arms, maybe turn so that they can really cuddle together, but he doesn’t know if that would be weird or too much.
“Mmmmh, I’m sleepy.” Yeosang punctuates his words with a long yawn, muffled into the curve of San’s shoulder. “Should cuddle until later.”
“You want to?”
Yeosang’s arm tightens a little around San’s waist. “Of course, I do, Sannie.” He nuzzles up along San’s neck. “I like cuddling at home, but I really like it after sex.”
San blinks. Turns abruptly in Yeosang’s arms so they’re facing each other. “We had sex,” he says, somewhere between an exclamation and question in his tone.
Yeosang’s brows furrow. “Yes,” He affirms, “we absolutely had sex.”
“Oh. Thank you,” San whispers, snuggling closer to Yeosang until they’re pressed together head to toe. “I always thought my first-time having sex would be really scary, but this was nice.”
A hum and a squeeze of Yeosang’s arms was all San got, but that was more than enough. He felt comfortable and safe and loved. After a moment, Yeosang stretched a little, quickly resettling after dropping something on their hips.
San giggled a little, pulling Shiber down so that he was cradled into the space between Yeosang and his shoulders. There was bit of cum matted into the fur around Shiber’s face, which San was ignoring. He would need to wash Shiber later, get rid of the physical signs. But for now, he could just enjoy being cuddled up together with Yeosang and the new flush of having sex.