Chapter Text
The sun was high in the sky, its rays glistening off the snow and making the world blinding. Bud waded through it, having just finished setting up the last of the Gyftmas lights, inflatables, and other outdoor decorations that they had yet to put up till then.
When he made it inside, stomping his boots on the mat so he wouldn't track in any snow, Romeo peeked his head out of the kitchen and lit up when he caught sight of the shorter skeleton.
"BUD! PERFECT TIMING! WOULD YOU BE SO KIND AS TO GO WAKE CASSY? I TOLD HER I WOULD HAVE SOMEONE GRAB HER WHEN LUNCH WAS FINISHED, AND IT IS NEARLY SO!"
Bud was a bit stunned. He was asking him? But what about- Oh. Bear was gone. Where had he run off to? And he saw Bun come in a while ago with Sprout; where were they?
Romeo caught on to Bud's confusion and elaborated without needing the questions to be asked.
"SPROUT, CINNAMON, BUN, AND I ARE BUSY IN THE KITCHEN; RIFLE, BULLET, STRETCH, AND EDGE ARE STILL AT WORK; BLUE, MILORD, AND ASH WENT TO GET MORE GROCERIES; RED AND VANILLA ARE STACKING ALL THE PRESENTS AT THE TREE, AND MUTT, HOPPER, AND BEAR ARE PACKING GOODIE BAGS. SO THAT LEAVES YOU!"
Bud stood there for a moment, processing, before nodding, slipping off his boots and putting them on the shoe rack.
"alright, i'll go get her."
Romeo beamed, "THANK YOU!" Then he slipped back into the kitchen.
Bud sighed, wishing he had the time to take a nap himself as he headed up the stairs and to the room the three newcomers had been occupying. Though, to be fair, it seemed Cassy needed it based on how Romeo had warned them all hours ago to be quiet if they went upstairs since she wasn't feeling well.
When he reached the door, he stood there, staring at the doorknob for several seconds, thoughts churning, before he went inside.
He hadn't been in their room before, and it was heavy with the three's scents. The mattress was pressed against the wall, and the floor was covered with pillows, blankets, and a variety of clothes. He was surprised to find a couple of his throw blankets and even one of his few hoodies amongst the mix.
And tangled in the center, absolutely wrapped and bundled, was Cassy. The only part of her that was visible was her face, from the nose up. She was absolutely adorable, the sight temporarily making him forget about his concerns.
He kneeled down in the literal nest, reaching out to gently shake her form as he softly called her name.
She made a few noises of displeasure before slowly blinking her eyes open. Bud watched, fascinated, as her faded blue-grey eyes shimmered a Dark Orchid shade briefly before they connected with his form. Her smile was soft as she spoke.
"Is it…" she yawned, her nose scrunching cutely as she did, "Is it lunch time?"
Bud nodded, watching her rub at her eyes and sit up sluggishly. His browbones were pinched with worry as he waited for her to fully wake up. When she did and noticed the expression on his skull, she tilted her head to the side curiously.
"What's wrong?"
He didn't answer at first, trying to figure out the best way to word things before he spoke.
"just… i've never known you to be the type to get so tired shortly after waking up. and Romeo mentioned before that you were feeling nauseous? are you sure you're not sick?"
Concern was practically bleeding out of every word he uttered, making Cassy smile appreciatively. Before answering him, she took a moment to evaluate herself.
Although she felt rather warm, she was sure that it was because she had been bundled up so securely. She no longer felt nauseous; rather, she had a massive appetite and a strange craving for oranges. Although she did notice that her magic stores were a little less than they were before, which was curious but not worrying.
Cassy carefully stood from her spot, seeing if movement would trigger her nausea again, but when nothing happened she nodded with satisfaction.
"I think I'm okay. I certainly feel better, at least. I think I just ate too much earlier."
Bud's brows furrowed, and Cassy knew he didn't believe that to be the cause. To be fair, Cassy didn't really believe it either. She's eaten much more before today. If anything, her appetite was lacking this morning. But she honestly couldn't think of any other reason for the nausea.
Bud didn't press the issue, thankfully, and stood alongside her.
"So, what were you up to before being tasked with waking me?"
A short chuckle escaped Bud's throat, and he told her about all the decorations he had put up around the property. Not to mention all the shenanigans the others have been up to. When he mentioned that Stretch, Rifle, Bullet, and Edge all had to head into work shortly after breakfast this morning, she got so fired up about it. For several minutes she ranted about how monsters should get Gyftmas off automatically just like humans did for Christmas.
The very entertaining vent was interrupted by her stomach grumbling quite loudly, making the two of them laugh.
"c'mon, let's go get some lunch. the others are probably waiting."
Without any hesitation, she bounced over to the door. Bud couldn't help grinning at how adorable she was. But when she opened the door to her room, looking over her shoulder at him, a sudden realization came to him.
He had developed a crush on her.
"Bud?"
He snapped out of his internal shock, staring down at a waiting Cassy.
"huh?"
She snickered, "I asked if you guys picked any oranges today."
It took him a moment to respond since he was still reeling from that sudden realization while also trying to remember what fruits Sprout and Bun brought in earlier.
"uh… i think they picked some, but i'm not sure."
With that, she grabbed his hand, and dragged him out of the room and down the stairs.
"Then let's go find out!"
Lunch was just as chaotic of an affair as breakfast was. Not everyone ate together, and Blue and Romeo were soon back to cooking for tonight's event. The meal was over by one, which left less than four hours before guests were to arrive.
Stretch and Edge were home by the tail end of lunch, but Rifle and Bullet wouldn't be home till about an hour before the party.
Cassy had gone upstairs as soon as she finished eating to take a shower and start getting ready. It took a long time to do her hair. Especially if she didn't want to burn herself. Ash was going to do her makeup later.
Everyone either went off to continue prepping the place for the party, or left to start getting ready themselves. Bun was on his way to his room to prep Cassy's clothes for her while she was bathing when Vanilla called his name.
The two stood in the foyer, looking at one another. Bun a little guarded and standing straight; Vanilla stiff and fidgeting with his jacket pockets.
"would you come with me?"
Bun's fists clenched, and Vanilla instantly noticed. He pulled one of his hands out of his pockets, a book appearing in mid-air just above it before landing in his palm.
"i, uh, gotta put this back and thought we could talk."
The implication that they would be going to the library eased the tension out of Bun, yet his frown remained. A sign that he was still upset with Vanilla despite the time that had passed.
Silence hung between them as they walked to the library, and even after the door closed, Vanilla didn't speak. Bun waited, patiently despite his displeasure, as Vanilla gathered his thoughts while putting his book away. It was only when he had slipped the novel onto the shelf that he gained enough confidence to speak.
"i don't think using the device to keep you anchored to the property was wrong."
Rage filled Bun, but before he could react, Vanilla continued.
"but i'm sorry that i used it on you guys for so long."
The posturing that Bun had instinctively been doing eased; his stony expression did not.
"when it was evident that you two had calmed down, i should've let you two go look for her, but i didn't. i was too scared. we'd had so many close calls with the others that i was paranoid and refused to listen to everyone else's suggestions."
Curiosity shaped Bun's face, and so Vanilla elaborated.
"Rifle, Ash, Sprout, Bud, and Cinn all advocated for me to turn the device off."
Of everyone on that list, Bun hadn't expected to hear Cinnamon's name be mentioned. Sure, he'd been very casual if not a bit bold since Cassy had arrived. However, he'd been especially distant before then. In truth, Bun was certain that his appearance disturbed Cinnamon until recently.
Despite his confusion, he grew a new appreciation for Cinnamon. Maybe he won't steal Cassy's underwear back from him after all. Though that's a massive maybe.
"point is, i don't regret using it initially. you guys needed time to cool off. but i regret not turning it off when you had. so, i'm sorry."
As Vanilla hung his head, Bun realized that he didn't expect to be forgiven. He only wanted Bun to know that he regretted his actions.
He also, whether intentionally or not, placed all the blame on himself. He was the one to use it on them, and he was the one to refuse to turn it off.
And as uncomfortable as Vanilla clearly was, he refused to move until he heard whatever Bun had to say, if he had anything to say at all.
In a way, despite all their differences, it reminded Bun so much of Bear. The two of them had upset Cassy a number of times over the years, and each time, Bear never expected to be forgiven. He only wanted her to know how sorry he was. Of course, she always forgave them anyway; understanding them beyond measure, even if it did take some time.
And Bun? He could understand Vanilla.
"You were inconsiderate of us. Allowing your fears and paranoia to control you, which ultimately brought injury to Cassy, even if indirectly. Not to mention the mental agony that all three of us experienced. I am certain that you heard mine and Bear's wails and anguish. Yet you chose to ignore it and run from the guilt. You chose to be cruel, rather than merciful. To say I was disappointed and resentful would be an understatement."
Vanilla's body jerked at the cold words, but remained in his spot, willing to take on whatever verbal lashing Bun had to give him.
However, he was surprised to feel a hand rest gently on his skull. When he looked up, his sockets widened at the forgiving smile on Bun's face.
"Even so, I would have to be blind to not notice your efforts to make it up to us. Even Cassy, whom you know is blind, could see all the ways you attempted to accommodate and bring comfort to us. And if she has taught us anything, it is to not allow any grudge we may have to make us ignorant of another's efforts to atone. The choice is still ours to determine if those efforts are enough to earn forgiveness, a second chance. And Vanilla, I believe this apology is more than enough. As long as you ensure to do the same for Angel and Bear. Do that, and I believe we can let bygones be bygones."
Vanilla nodded, trying desperately to keep the tears at bay, which only made Bun's smile wider. He was surely having many sappy interactions today.
Bear had had enough.
Several times now, more than he cared to count, Milord had gone to approach him, only to ditch at the last second. Didn't matter if he was alone or with others. He'd chicken out and Bear would be left with this burning curiosity and restless frustration.
And when Milord had done it again while he had been helping set up the surround sound system in the living room with Hopper and Mutt, the three of them becoming an odd team throughout the day, it broke all his resolve to continue waiting.
Once the system was set up, Bear followed the distinct scent of black liquorish and cherries until he reached the foyer where Milord was setting up "Gyftmas Village" on one of the many decorative tables placed around the room.
"Gyftmas Village" became a new tradition to Gyftmas after seeing all the "Christmas Villages" that the humans made for Christmas. The monster version, of course, featured Snowdin with the giant tree, Gyftrot standing nearby with a bunch of presents all over, and any other buildings, features, monsters, and humans they chose to include.
Based off the fact that at least four other tables had been decorated with intricate mini villages, Milord working on a fifth as Bear stalked over, it was safe to say it was a favored tradition in this household.
Having masked his presence, Milord was none-the-wiser to his approach until it was too late. Bear's hand had a firm grasp of his shoulder, and Milord was forced to face him rather than be given the opportunity to run away.
Milord's sockets narrowed as he glared up at Bear, though he could tell that he was masking his true feelings.
"And Who Do You Think You Are, Grabbing Me So Rudely?"
Bear scoffed, slipping the mini building resembling a Grillby's out of Milord's hand and placing it on the table before dragging the smaller skeleton to the couch. Milord tried to put up a fight, but the size and strength difference was too great.
"the lil coward that's been running from me all day and is now giving me attitude cause he's too scared to face his fears."
Bear tossed Milord onto the couch, making him bounce once before staring up at Bear, aghast.
"now i suggest you talk or else i'll have to bring Sugar into this."
Milord scowled for a moment, his mind racing before he sighed, practically melting into the plush cushions as he lost all sense of fight left in him. Sensing this, Bear sat in the spot next to him.
It was several seconds of Milord picking at his turtleneck sweater, the one he'd changed into after lunch and flaking out earlier, before he stopped altogether as he spoke.
"I… I Have Been Struggling With Not Seeing-" he swallowed harshly, his voice cracking as he forced out the next word, "Her In Cassy. I Want To Get To Know Her, To Form A Connection, But It Is So Difficult When Every Time I Look At Her, She Is All I See. Bleeding And Broken And Dying And Dead."
By this point, Milord had sat up, burying his skull in his hands as he struggled to keep his composure.
"I Do Not Know What To Do."
Bear stared for a long time at Milord before chuckling softly. Milord instantly snapped to attention, glaring daggers at the massive skeleton.
"they're not the same person."
"That Is Not Helpful! Nor Is It Amusing! I Already Know That They Are Not The Exact Same-"
"no. they're not the same at all. they're two different souls, just like we are."
Milord calmed, noticing now that the chuckle he was making, the smile he had, was melancholic.
"you have to think of them less as two sides of the same coin and more like twins. same face, same name, but not the same person. if it's hard, then look at us."
Bear gestured between the two, and for the first time in a while, Milord actually looked at Bear. Aside from the obvious differences in their appearance, like their scars, magic signature, and heights, there were clear differences in how they behaved.
Milord was the type to keep himself composed even when consumed by emotions; Bear never hesitated in letting his show regardless to how people would perceive him.
Milord always made sure his presence was known, taking pride in being seen; Bear ensured his presence was concealed, taking great pleasure in remaining undetected.
Milord was more conservative when it came to acts of affection, regardless to if they were platonic or romantic; Bear wasn't shy in showing off his love for his brother and his mate, wanting everyone to be aware of how much both meant to him.
Those were only scratching the surface, but it brought clarity to Bear's earlier words. Despite the two of them, technically, being the same person, they were extremely different. All they truly shared, besides some minor interests here and there, was their face and name. And even then, that couldn't really be said anymore.
So he started to apply the same logic to what he knew about his Cassy, and the one he knew now. Granted, he didn't know much about either of them, but what he did helped ease his soul as he compared them.
His had radiant sky blue eyes; theirs had faded blue-grey eyes. His had enjoyed spring; theirs adored fall. His was deaf; theirs was blind. His couldn't use magic; theirs could. His had a baby brother; theirs was an only child.
Their voices were different; their clothes preferences were different; their majors were different; they- they were different.
They weren't the same person.
Closing his sockets, Milord imagined them in his mind. This time, instead of the two overlapping, they stayed separate; acknowledging each other, but not merging.
The relief was heavy and sudden, like a crashing wave. He opened his sockets, looking at Bear as a single magical tear streamed down his right cheek. His voice a soft whisper, but filled with emotion.
"Thank You…"
Bear grinned, leaning back against the couch, closing his own sockets in peace.
"anytime."