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The video began with a clip from the Wayne family's latest public appearance, the press conference about Jason Todd's astonishing return from the grave. The screen was cut so that Jason himself was out of frame, with Tim Drake, half-standing, being placed in the center.
"Bruce Wayne is actually Batman!" he hollered.
There was dead silence as Tim spread his hands as if to say ta-da! The frame froze, a sound effect of crickets being played over the image.
Then another Tim Drake popped up in front of the screen capture, grinning in half delight, half sheepishness.
"So," he said. "That happened. And there's about a trillion conspiracy theories now, and technically speaking, I'm not exactly supposed to be making any kind of 'official statements' like, ever again, but..." He grinned wider. "The rest of the people in the house who aren't Bruce actually do have a sense of humor, so consider this video officially sanctioned by the family."
"Semi-officially," Dick Grayson's voice called from off-camera.
"Alfred said it was fine, therefore, officially," Tim countered. "Anyway, since nobody really believes me, and it's the truth, all us kids are here today to prove to you that Bruce Wayne is Batman!"
The still from the press conference disappeared, and the camera view expanded. All six Wayne children became visible, arranged around Tim and a blonde girl about his height. Their expressions varied from glee (Tim, Jason, and the blonde) to hesitant excitement (Dick, Cass, and Duke) to utter boredom (Damian). The one thing they all had in common however, was their T-shirts.
Every one of the seven children was wearing a black t-shirt with a yellow Batsignal, and white text that read MY DAD IS BATMAN.
"Our cousin Kate is filming for us," Tim continued, and a slim, pale hand came into view and waved. "And our friend Barbara is editing, because apparently nobody trusts me anymore."
An elegant black font over a white ribbon declared, That is correct.
"I never trusted you, Drake," Damian said flatly.
"We trust you," Dick explained. "We just don't trust your judgement."
"And this is Steph," Tim went on, unperturbed, gesturing to the blonde. "She's my... uh..."
They both looked at each other. Barbara put up subtitles as they whispered for a second.
What the hell actually are we?
I dunno. Besties? Ex-exes? Friends-to-lovers-to-sorta-enemies-back-to-lovers?
'Girlfriend' sounds wrong.
But, like, we are dating.
"Holy 'It's Complicated,' Batman," Dick muttered.
"I'm his Steph," the girl finally said, shrugging but decisive.
"Sure, we'll go with that." Tim turned back to the camera, slightly pink. "She's my Steph, I'm her Tim."
"That's precious."
"Shut up, Jason!"
Tim was definitely blushing now. Jason smirked unapologetically, and Damian pretended to throw up.
"Back to Batman," Tim choked. "Um, first off, gonna say for the record that I was not high... or drunk... but maybe a little sleep-deprived..."
"He means he was awake for about forty nine hours leading up to the press conference," Jason said blandly.
"Ja-son!" Tim whined through gritted teeth, turning halfway around. "Shut the frick up!"
Duke mercifully interrupted whatever Jason had been about to say back with, "Anyway, moving on, um, Point Number One, somebody connected how many of us there are to how many Batkids there are, and all the times and whatnot, and um, yeah. We're the Batkids!"
He hesitantly threw up jazz hands. Dick and Steph joined him, but Damian turned away to facepalm.
"I'm the Signal, Cass is Batgirl, and all them were Robin at some point." He waved at Dick, Jason, Tim, Steph, and Damian.
"I was the OG," Dick grinned proudly.
"Yes, Dick, we know you're ancient," Jason said. Dick sputtered, much to the amusement of all his siblings. Even Damian had to hide a snicker. Another subtitle on a banner promised, We love you anyway, you fossil.
"I am not ancient!" Dick squawked. "I'm experienced!"
"There, there," Cass said, patting his shoulder with one hand even as she hid her giggles with the other. Dick pouted.
"Jason and I make up the Dead Robins Club," Steph chirped, talking right over Dick's continued grumbling.
"Damn right."
They performed a complicated handshake/fistbump routine that ended with Jason's hand 'exploding' (accompanied by sound effect) and Steph's flattening out, almost like paper (she made a beeeeeep noise, but it wasn't a censor).
"Can you hooligans be any more morbid?" Damian huffed.
"I'm Red Robin," Tim said, practically vibrating as he took a sip from his ever-present travel mug. "And I was the Grover Cleveland Robin, because I came after Jay and before Damian, but Steph was Robin in the middle of that because of, uh, reasons."
"Yep!" Steph cheered. "And Dami's the Stabby Cinnamon Roll Robin."
"I will stab you, Brown," Damian snarled.
"But I'm your second-favorite sibling," Steph whimpered, blinking fast and pouting her lips. "If you stab me, who's gonna watch dog movies with you?"
Damian grumbled something under his breath that Barbara either couldn't or wouldn't caption.
"Nobody's stabbing anybody," Dick said, sounding very older-brotherish.
"Nope! We're gonna show you the Tower instead!" Tim said. "Follow!"
He waved and turned around, his siblings all filing after him in twos and threes. The camera followed, its view mostly of the back of Jason's T-shirt, although a wood-paneled hallway stretched along the periphery.
After a sped-up minute, the kids poured into a study, which, aside from the technology, could have looked like stepping back into the 1800s. The kids passed up a tall grandfather clock and stopped in a huddle around a bookshelf near the window.
"So, looking at the house from outside," Tim said excitedly, "there's a towerish thing--"
"The word you're looking for is 'turret,'" Jason interrupted.
Tim squinted at him and mouthed something suspiciously like fuck you.
"There's a turret right above us. And the thing is, there's no way to get inside it."
"Well, the windows," Dick shrugged.
Duke turned on him with wide eyes.
"It's five stories tall."
"Easy," Cass grinned.
"Just show them, Drake, enough with the pageantry," Damian huffed.
Tim muttered something that Barbara captioned: No one appreciates a good build-up anymore. He stepped up to the bookshelf, said very sarcastically, "Voila!" And shoved it aside to reveal an iron spiral staircase.
"Just for the record," Duke said quietly, as Tim and Steph bounded up the stairs, "we don't have any ghosts."
"Just zombies," Jason snickered, swiping a hand through Duke's hair as he passed.
The camera zoomed in on all the cobwebs, rusting iron, and dark corners on the way up the stairs. Eerie music played so faintly in the background it was almost inaudible. The stairs creaked ominously under the kids' feet, and someone (probably Jason) stomped hard enough to make the iron shudder.
Finally the stairway opened up in the middle of a wide, circular room, strangely sunny due to all the windows high on the walls. A ladder on one side led to a half-circle loft. The ceiling peaked high above in a cone.
But far more impressive than the architecture was everything inside the room.
A massive, curved computer spread along a great portion of the wall. Worktables, desks, sophisticated chemistry set-ups, and several other lab-like devices created a maze across the floor, which the kids navigated effortlessly. Along the wall under the loft was a row of glass cases containing multiple stunning Batman suits.
"Welcome to our decidedly-not-evil lair!" Tim said, throwing his arms up and spinning around.
"Sorry about the mess," Dick winced, shoving a fast-food container off the counter.
"Don't make it worse!" Jason complained, swatting the back of Dick's head.
Dick winced and rubbed the spot. Jason disappeared behind the counter and popped back up, pitching the food wrapper off-screen. The camera panned to watch it land perfectly inside the trash can.
"This is where the magic happens, folks!" Steph said, hopping up on one of the counters. She had to shove several batarangs out of the way before she could sit down. "And by magic I mean lots and lots of unglamorous detective shit."
"Paperwork." Cass scrunched up her face, saying the word like a swear.
"Zoom and enhance," Duke snickered.
"Conspiracy boards!" Tim cried delightedly, waving his arms at one posted on the wall. Anything resembling words or faces were too blurry to recognize, but the work was clear and careful, and there were so many intersecting red lines it looked more like a piece of abstract art.
Dick wandered closer and inspected it for a minute before pointing to a newspaper clipping.
"Never would've connected that," he mused. "Nice work, Timmy."
Tim basked in the praise like a sunflower in the light.
"Todd!" Damian called imperiously. "Spar with me."
The camera panned around to see Damian standing on a counter holding a katana. A real one.
"Wait, no fighting!"
"Ah, skittles."
"Come at me, midget!"
The camera whipped around in a blur to show Jason, holding a much longer, also very real sword, nearly feral grin on his face.
"Fight, fight, fight!" Steph cheered off-screen.
The next few minutes (sped up) were complete chaos. Papers, paraphernalia, and occasionally people went flying as Damian and Jason darted over the counters, swords clashing loudly, flashing blindingly in the sun. Once, a bunch of smoke pellets scattered and burst on the ground, and all that was visible were shadowy forms and gloom. Duel of the Fates blared in the background.
Dick seemed to be trying to find a safe way to end the fight, but usually had to leap out of the way, clinging to shelves, window frames, and other impossible perches to avoid getting slashed. Duke had instantly scurried over to the camera, hiding behind it and whispering things that were captioned as oh shit oh shit, they want blood, they want blood and they're gonna get it, this is baaaad... Steph was calling out incendiary comments, offering advice, and generally having the time of her life. She had procured a concerning amount of popcorn from somewhere, and seemed to be eating it out of an upside down Red Hood helmet.
Tim had somehow been dragged into the fight, valiantly defending himself with a single batarang until Jason picked him up by his shirt collar and bodily threw him out of the way. The camera panned over for a split second to zoom in on his pout. Barbara added a white comic sans comment:
*But violence!*
Damian was throwing all his force into attacking Jason, preferring to block blows over dodging them. Jason, on the other hand, was unfairly nimble for a man his size, and used his extra reach to his advantage, swiping at Damian before darting back again. Neither of them were looking at all at their footing, even though they were jumping on and off counters and desks, and even swinging around on the ladder.
"This happens quite often," a female voice murmured behind the camera. "My money's on Jason."
But as it turned out, neither of them won. The music cut out with an almighty crash before an explosion with a tiny mushroom cloud engulfed the room in smoke once more. Everyone started coughing, camera shaking. Somewhere Jason was hollering, "Great fucking job, squirt!"
And then a bellow from below.
"What the hell are you kids doing up there!?"
The screen switched to cut panels of each Wayne kid's terrified expression. Dick's eyes were wide, and he lost his death grip on the ladder and fell with another loud crash. Jason immediately straightened from his position curled protectively over Damian and hollered, "Demon brat started it!"
"Fuck you, Todd!" Damian yelled back, shoving Jason away and holding his sword point up under Jason's chin. Stephanie hurriedly shoved the popcorn in a filing cabinet. Tim hid his batarang behind his back with a squeak. Duke whispered, "Oh, thank God." Cass was finally located sitting up in the loft blowing bubble gum bubbles, looking wholly unconcerned.
The camera shook, and when the vision cleared, it seemed to be held at the person's hip, tilted up. Bruce Wayne filled the frame, towering in the angle the way he never seemed to straight on. His arms were folded across his chest, brows lowered, lips a thin line.
"Damian, put the sword down. Tim, Dick, get off the floor, there's broken glass everywhere. Jason, what chemicals spilled?"
Jason rattled off a list of five or six, concluding, "They did whatever damage they were gonna do."
Dick and Tim sheepishly got to their feet. Damian reluctantly let his sword drop, grumbling under his breath.
Bruce blinked a few times before asking, "Do I want to know about the t-shirts?"
"I plead the fifth." Tim cleared his throat.
"Fine. Whatever." Bruce shook his head as if to clear it. Then he looked at whoever was holding the camera. "Kate, what are you doing here?"
"Getting entertained."
Bruce shook his head again. "Alright, well, one of you, tell me what the hell you were doing." He glanced from one child to another, narrowing his eyes. "Stephanie?"
Steph's head jerked up. Her eyes widened, and she cast a panicked glance around at the others, who shrugged or shook their heads, camera darting from one to the other.
"Uhh..."
The camera swung back to Bruce, who raised his eyebrows expectantly.
"Well, we were... um... We were... having a debate!" Steph lit up, nodding excitedly. The others nodded with her.
"About? Tim?"
Tim looked distinctly like a deer caught in headlights.
"We were debating about..." he stretched out each word for as long as it could go, glancing around wildly for inspiration. The camera followed wherever his gaze darted, landing on batarangs, a helpless Steph, the broken glass, and finally on the cases with the suits.
"We were debating about who has the best Batman voice!"
"Damian just didn't want to face the truth that it's me," Jason said instantly, in a frighteningly perfect imitation of Batman's voice.
"Fork you, Jason!" Dick snapped, in another wonderful impersonation of Batman. "I was Batman!"
"Boys, boys," Steph interrupted, trying her very, very best. "You're both beautiful, but it's obviously me."
"Well, ya know what, Dick, somewhere in the multiverse, I was Batman too!"
"If the multiverse existed, we would have found it by now!" Tim complained, voice cracking between 'Batman' and regular tenor-pitched Tim Drake.
"Lack of proof does not constitute proof to the contrary, Tim, you fucking know this!" Jason exploded.
"But the multi-"
"Enough!"
They all fell silent at the roar of Batman's-- no, Bruce's-- BatBruce's?-- their father's impossibly low, gravelly voice. He massaged his temples, muttering something that Barbara captioned, Somewhere in the multiverse, I stopped at one.
A very teeny tiny white ribbon declared, No, you didn't.
"Jason, take care of the chemicals that spilled. Dick, Cass, get all the glass off the floor. Stephanie, whatever food you had, clean it up, and clean out Hood's helmet before there's another hot sauce episode. Tim, Damian, Duke, get all the papers up here back in order. Kate, I don't even want to know why you're filming, but if you're staying for dinner, please tell Alfred sooner rather than later."
The camera's eye dropped towards the floor as soon as Bruce called it out, but it was shaking with Kate's suppressed laughter. There was utter silence before footsteps, then silence for about five more seconds before Tim whispered, "Oh my god, I can't believe that worked!"
"You just lied to Batman and survived," Duke breathed. The camera panned up to show his eyes wide and round. "I think that deserves a medal or something."
"He's too used to us being petty little shits," Jason said wisely, grabbing a towel and pouring a greenish substance over it.
"Kate, can you take over the tour?" Tim called, stooping down to grab a sheaf of old, crinkled, yellow parchment.
"Sure."
The camera shook for a second before it settled, and slowly started moving around the room while the woman narrated.
"Here we have filing cabinets storing a completely unnecessary twenty years of paper records, despite the fact that he's built a computer system that is completely unhackable, breakable, or crashable unless Babs gets pissed."
Damn straight.
"It's also home to a worrying amount of Spoiler's snacks, and if it weren't for Alfred the Cat, there would be a horde of rodents after them by now."
The camera zoomed in on Steph, who was dumping the popcorn in the trash. She stuck out her tongue and flipped Kate the bird.
"Here we see a wild Jason (I say wild because he is housetrained but nowhere near domesticated)."
"Fuck you too, Kate."
"His natural habitat is any and all libraries, but, when away, he will default to nerding over the nearest nerdable substances, hence why he can shockingly be trusted with dangerous objects unless in the presence of other species who provoke the Jason to violence."
You provoke me to violence, Jason apparently muttered.
The camera had been circling him as he scrubbed a nasty, goopy stain off the floor, but now turned to the giant computer.
"This thing is quite possibly the most law-breaking technology to ever exist, I swear it can hack paper files by now. Also it is definitely, absolutely not used for family computer games, never at all."
"I'm the Among Us family champ!" Dick hollered off-screen.
"Because you're a cheating bastard!" Jason yelled back.
"You... can't.... cheat... in Among Us...?" Duke said hesitantly, as though he wasn't sure his siblings hadn't found a way to do exactly that.
"It's his damn puppy eyes," Jason grumbled.
"Jason! Why would you say that?"
The camera whipped from the computer to Dick, who had just dumped a dustpan of glittering glass into the trash can. His lips were pursed into a pout, and he'd somehow made his eyes look much bigger and rounder than they really were, and incredibly blue.
*is innocence*
"That's the problem with playing up here, everyone can see everyone's faces, and this fucking manchild always cheats because we're supposed to be poker-faced."
*Is this the face of an Imposter????*
Dick doubled his efforts. It should have looked ridiculous, by all rights, but no, instead it was more heartbreaking that pictures of sad puppies and bunnies.
"He's been doing this since the very first days of Robin," Kate explained. "It's his most effective weapon, and we thought he'd grow out of it, but to the danger of the entire criminal underworld, no, no, he has not. A record forty-seven thugs have fallen to this face alone, and three turned themselves in practically in tears."
"What can I say?" Dick shrugged, dropping the innocence in favor of charm. "I'm irresistible."
"Stop embarrassing yourself, Grayson." Damian slammed a stack of papers on the counter.
"Those are top secret and extremely important," Kate said. "Which is why they were lying out in the open and one has coffee stains."
"It wasn't my fault!"
"Sure, Timbo."
The camera panned over the row of glass cases, each holding a hero suit, all with varying shades and emblems, and most looking more than a bit bedraggled. First came six or seven Batman suits, then pants-less Robin suits, then Robins with green pants, then black. Two Batgirl suits were also in the lineup, one of which had purple striping down the sides.
"This is proof that Bruce is a nostalgic bastard, because there is absolutely no purpose for these, least of all the short-shorts."
"I was nine!"
"Yeah, but you wore them until you were fucking fourteen, Dick."
"I'm an acrobat, that's just how it's done!"
"Is Discowing how it's done, too, Dick?" Steph called.
"I stand by that decision!"
"And the mullet?" Duke challenged.
The camera swung around to show Dick surrounded by all six of his very judgmental-looking siblings. Not even Cass was showing him mercy, standing with folded arms and raised eyebrows. So quietly it was almost inaudible, Dick muttered, Ok, fine, maybe that was a little too much.
Tim rolled his eyes before striding towards the camera, waving at Kate to follow.
"We're not even gonna go near the armory, because we don't need World War ninety-seven point two to break out," he said. "Suffice it to say, we have a lot of sharp pointy things and even more long whacky things, and we all know how to use them."
"There's also big shooty things," Jason added. "And if you're Cass, you don't need a weapon, you are the weapon."
The camera panned to show Cass, who smiled widely, looking angelic and devilish at the same time. She signed rapidly, I learned how to break a man's legs before I could even walk on mine, and proudly finished aloud, "Fear me!" still beaming.
"We do, Cassie," Duke said, patting her shoulder reverently. "We do."
The camera swung and shuddered as Kate climbed up the ladder, sometimes showing Tim's Converse, sometimes the other kid's heads. When she reached the top, Kate held it up again, revealing a large, cluttered area filled with odds and ends that made absolutely no sense. Over underneath the largest window was a large planter box, filled with colorful, exotic plants in all colors of the rainbow. A floor-to-ceiling corkboard propped next to it had hundreds of post-it notes and little slips of paper on it. A cartoonish wooden hammer, nearly as tall as Damian, sat upside down on the other side of the indoor garden. A very, very ugly vase that must have been from five thousand years ago had a palm tree bursting out of its top. A small glacier sat in the middle of a kiddie pool filled nearly to its brim with water. Damian made his way over to it and picked up a bucket (with a Batman logo on the side), filling it up and taking it water all the plants.
"This is the Rogue's Galleria," Tim announced, spreading his arms and spinning around. "We've got all sorts of souvenirs up here."
"Father forbade Dr. Isely from giving us any poisonous plants," Damian said disappointedly, filling the bucket again and carrying it to the palm tree. "But most of these are medicinal."
"Riddler riddles!" Steph cheered, waving at the corkboard. "'What is more useful when it's broken?'"
"According to Ra's, me."
"Tim!"
"Tim, no."
"Timmy, we've talked about this," Dick winced.
"Yeah, and I'm right, but he can go die in a hole," Tim said carelessly, poking the iceberg. "We should send Mr. Freeze to the Arctic, global warming would be a non-issue."
"For reference," Jason said, "Eight years ago, that was as tall as thirteen-year-old me, and now it's still as tall as thirteen-year-old Damian."
"We should have the Sirens over again," Tim mused.
"Yes, please," Kate said wickedly.
"I am not listening to you and Bruce competitively flirt with Selina again," Jason groaned. "Do you hear me? I am going back to my fucking coffin if you pull that shit again."
"I will join you," Damian muttered, dead-eyed.
"So, anyway," Tim said, wandering back into frame. "Hope you guys enjoyed your tour of Batman Incorporated. Sorry about the, uh, snafu."
"Snafu is military slang for 'Situation Normal: All Fucked Up,'" Jason interrupted, coming over to stand next to Tim. "And 'round here, explosions and death-matches are situation normal. Snafu for us would be you and the demon brat cuddling or some shit."
"That will never happen," Damian scoffed, also moving into frame.
The other kids filed into the same formation they'd had at the beginning as Barbara wrote, It did happen, multiple times. She put up two photographs, one of Damian on a cot with a cast up to his hip, Tim spooning him carefully; the other of Tim in a hospital with an oxygen mask, Damian lying very nearly on top of him, fist clutching Tim's gown so tight his knuckles were pale.
"So yeah," Tim continued. "There's the truth and the proof we've got. I mean, like, we could prove it prove it, but that would be a really bad idea for security reasons, so, anyway, that's our story and we're sticking to it!"
"Thanks for watching!" Dick called politely.
"Like, comment, and subscribe," Duke snickered.
"Notification bell," Cass grinned.
"Bat-brats out!"
Tim nodded to Kate and the camera went dark.
Comments:
✔️Dick.Grayson: fOSsiL!?
✔️Dick.Grayson: Babs, YOu aRe LitERAlly OldER thAN mE!
HerMajesty: immortals don't age 💅
disasterpants: if cousin kate narrated, i would literally start watching documentaries for fun
MariaKK: jason the vocabulary police 😂
evanlovesbroadway: ironic with how much he swears tbh
✔️JTthezombie: it's about using the right word, regardless of formality. Sometimes that word is "turret" and sometimes that word is "fuck"
Saradise: holy shit, bruce wayne really does sound like batman 😳
janabeepboop: yeah, well so do jason and dick!
dontcallmecute: I can now rest in peace having heard the words "FORK YOU!" in batman's voice
✔️JTthezombie: weird thing to have on your bucket list, but ok
firstruleoffightclub: i want to see a wayne fam among us game
LissaEvans<3: tim. Tim, darling, precious summer child. The answer is an egg. An E G G.
radusername: who tf is this "rahsz"?
RockinRobin: idk, but he sounds like a piece of work! 😠
✔️JTthezombie: Ra's is a slimy old bastard who can absolutely go die in a hole
✔️DamianWayne: The sooner the better for that, honestly.
DUMbledore!: tim is red robin. bc he's YUMMM
✔️JTthezombie: oh god tell me i didn't just read that
✔️Timber!: thanks... i think
ilikepurple: He a snac, but he my snac
guessilldie: guys, i knew tim drake in middle school. Biggest batman/robin geek you ever met. All this crazy shit is probably Bruce being an indulgent dad, i mean, hes got the $$ for it
FITme19: CATWOMAN'S A BICON, PASS IT ON!
WanyeKest: "batman" would date his own rogue?
Areyoukittenme?: why not?
whats'updog'?: whoever Barbara is is a fantastic editor. The captions and the star wars music have me in legit tears
HerMajesty: Why, thank you!
cristiethecrab: oh my god, they have a secret passageway! 😮
we'reallmadhere: maybe wayne really IS batman!
JustJohanna: oh please, tons of old houses have secret staircases and shit. Where else would old rich white men hide their money and liquor?
WhenSeptemberEnds: ok, but do tons of old houses have a fucking superhero hangout in them?
Carrie: the SNUGGLESSSS 😭😭😭😭
greendragon: they're brothers, your honor 😭😭😭 i love them so much
PrimEverdeendeservedbetter: the fuck happened in those pictures?
✔️Timber!: you probably wouldn't believe me if i told you
MadamLibrarian: ....multiverse?
✔️Timber!: there is no multiverse. Jason is a troll
✔️JTthezombie: there is absolutely a fucking multiverse, and believe me, we should be damn glad we're not out in some of those 'verses
peter.johnson: how do you know this?
[48 more commments in this thread]
Uselesspan: just when i thought i couldn't POSSIBLY adore the wayne boys more, dick had to go MURDER me with those baby blues 😫😫
doodledot12:the TSHIRTS.
Eyo!:i need to know where to get one
✔️Timber!: etsy 😂
lilymaid: even tims family thinks hes a disaster, poor boy 😂
✔️DamianWayne: We don't think, we know.
shayiscray: steph is a queen, i stan her
✔️Timber!: Me too
Ilikepurple: Yes, I'm amazing 💁🏼♀️
timdrakeownsmyheart: tims Lady of Chaos
011011000110111101101100: Hail Our Lady of Chaos!
whothehellisbucky: hail!
✔️Timber!: hail!
rubyread: the way they literally started with a "previously on" tho 😂😂😂😂
Maureena: i dont know who cousin Kate is but i think im in love
Grace(less) : apparently all of the wayne ladies are just Queens
theForceIsWithMe: "im her tim shes my steph" Jason's right, that is the most precious thing ive heard 😍
enterusername: i ship them so fucking hard 😭
lilliasilly-a: i want that on a tshirt
larabean: never really considered how much "office" work batman would have to do. 🤔 Thought it was pretty much just punching 🤷♂️
ShaneWoods: oh my god, yes i fear you Cass 😶😶
callmemaybe: Badass Queen!
✔️Cassafrass: 😊💅👑
letmeLIVE: jason todd is peak Sibling. Shields damian from a chemical blast then immediately throws him under the bus 🤣🤣
Killemwithkindness: wait wth Steph died too?!
Ilikepurple: 2/10. Very dramatic but not much fun
✔️JTthezombie: cant have Drama without Trauma
Iamthenight: the fuck is going on with the handshake?
✔️DukeofGotham: just don't ask
aKNIFE!no!: told y'all damian = stabby boi
Percych.YEET: everyone trashing dick's fashion choices 😂😂
✔️Dick.Grayson: it wasn't that bad
✔️DamianWayne: Yes it was. Be glad I still associate with you.
Batwatcher45: 😂😂🤣🤣🤣😂🤣🤣😂 im dying. Jason just YEETS tim across the room 🤣🤣🤣😂🤣😂😂🤣😂😂🤣😂
What'sinaname?: but 🎆VIOLENCE!🎆 😂😂
La-di-da: poor duke 🤣
MoonlightSONYAta: #savedukethomas
✔️DukeofGotham: #savedukethomas PLEASE 🙏
Whatupimjared: oh, shit, Dad ModeTM activated!
MaryBeckham97: #savebruce2k22
Lilyloo: cass, oml 😂😂
Gaynerd98: she be chillin'
Whothehellisbucky: "hot sauce episode?" @redhoodie, wtf?
Redhoodie: someone ate nachos with hot sauce out of my helmet and didn't wash it and i didn't wear my extra mask that day and i was blind for like a week
Eyo!: wait, @redhoodie, is all this true? Are the waynes really the bats? Who tf are you then?
Redhoodie: yes, the waynes are absolutely the bats, you are totally correct, that is a completely rational theory