Chapter Text
Petra’s mugwort tea brew made him dizzy. He sat the floral teacup on his nightstand then rubbed his eyes; his fingers warm from the ceramic. He couldn’t even finish the tea cause to be frank, it wasn’t all that good. It tasted like dried herbs with cinnamon. Lukas sucked on his teeth and tucked himself under the sheets. Even though the beverage was gross it did the trick. The liquid could knock him out in an instant if he let it.
Touching his lamp the room went dark. He would have to remember to write anything suspicious from his dreams in the morning. It had been daunting to wake up so early, even on his off days. Nothing too crazy had happened since the dream of Aiden in the flower field. He felt guilty in a sense. Was he finally moving on from Aiden? Had he not been thinking of him enough? He thought about him every day. But he had to admit, he was thinking a lot about his own troubles recently. He looked to the corner of his room where his cane was and he sighed while closing his eyes. Sleep sounded good right now. There was nothing to wake up to. No work, and his class was later in the day. There would be no stupid alarm to wake him up. His body slowly let go of its unconscious tension, leaving him peacefully sprawled out the bed until black took over his mind.
When Lukas opened his eyes he saw blue. The scent of flowers and fresh air overtook his lungs. He laid on his back, looking up at the sky. The gentle breeze made him hyper aware of the plants touching his skin. He was in the dream again. Anxiety shot through him and he sat him. This time he noticed the flowers were a light red instead of purple. His mind swirled, looking around for something. Anything. But all he could see were the hills of flowers.
“Hello?” He called out. But was only met with the singing wind. Blinking, he decided if he had to be here he might as well adventure. Lukas noticed his body wasn't in pain, and he could run if he wanted to. But his cautious side took over, and he slowly walked north, cringing every time he stepped on a flower.
After a while he found an oasis like puddle. There was a huge pine tree hanging over, and leaves were on the surface of the water. No life resided in the water, it was a pure, crisp blue. It looked appetizing so Lukas cupped his hands in the water for a drink. The coldness made him shiver, losing a bit of water. But he graciously lapped up the remaining liquid. It was nothing like he had tasted before. He could feel how smooth it went down his throat, and it had a hint of lavender to it. On his knees he closed his eyes and took in the taste. He went for another drink and he moaned at the sweet tasting liquid. Maybe this weird universe had beautiful things to offer after all.
For what felt like an eternity Lukas just sat by the water and meditated. That was until the breeze changed. It grew much more harsher causing him to open his eyes. He looked up. Was it going to storm? But the sky was clear. Then when he looked back down he noticed the reason for the sudden change and his heart dropped.
“Aiden!” He called out while getting up in a hurry.
He nearly tripped but saved himself at the last moment. The crunch of each petal dying was loud, but he could care less about the flowers right now. The closer and closer he got the more his friends features came into play. He could see his muscles through his leather jacket, his stubble, the scar on his lip. He just stood there, watching Lukas approach with no emotion in his eyes.
The wind blew against Lukas’ face, his tears flying in the wind. He finally reached Aiden and heaved out a defeated sigh as he leaned into him. “Aiden… Oh Aiden… Fuck. I- I missed you so much…” His scent was familiar. The cheap cologne he had gotten from the corner store, the fake leather on his jacket. Aiden didn't move, just let Lukas desperately hold onto him as he cried. Everything felt so real even though he knew it was a dream. But he could feel Aiden's heart beating. Or was that his own? He couldn't tell.
“Wake up Lukas.” The words were gentle but they almost jolted him. He looked up to the ghost. He was always a bit taller than him.
“Wh- But I haven't had the chance to talk to you! Why do you want me gone?”
He swore he could see a frown on Aiden's face. “You have to wake up.”
Even though Lukas was a mess, this was the only time in the past few months when everything felt right. Aiden was here, so that meant everything would be okay. He blinked through his tears and saw Aiden raise a hand. “Please. Just a little longer. Let me stay. I need you.”
But then everything turned black with a snap of Aiden's fingers. He was back in his bed. Lukas noticed real tears were streaming down his face. He knew the dream was powerful but he had never woken up crying like this before. He didn't know what to feel. Angry, sad, confused? His hands were still reminiscent of Aiden's touch. It felt so familiar.
He turned over and touched the lamp on. He saw his journal lying there but his heart was beating too quickly for him to hold the pen steady. Fuck. He wished he could go back and just stay with him. He hoped the ghost wasn’t angry with him, he didn’t seem to be though. Checking his phone he saw it was 5 in the morning. He knew he wouldn’t be able to sleep after that. At least today was his off day, so he didn’t need to worry about being depressed at work.
A sense of dread overtook him. He would be alone until Axel woke up. Maybe Jesse was awake? He decided to text him.
“You up?” He typed away and hit send.
He lay in the bed for ten minutes but there was no response. Makes sense, Jesse had a decent sleep schedule.
As each minute went by he felt more on edge. The dark corners of his rooms looked like shadow people, and he had to blink his eyes and make it go away. He pulled his knees close and huffed. “Aiden… I know I’m being paranoid, and I know you’re not a god or whatever but. Please look over me.”
He realized how weird the sentence sounded, he hadn’t said something like that since he had prayed in elementary school. Oddly enough the words did put him at ease. Within a few seconds he felt the familiar ringing in his ears.
“Aiden?” He looked around like he would appear out of thin air but there was nothing but darkness. He cracked open the blinds so his mind would stop playing tricks on him. Suddenly he became self-conscious in his boxers and tank top, he decided to put on some lounge pants in case Aiden was around.
He got up and dug in his jacket pocket. Finding the old photo of the two at the skate park. “Remember this?” He held it up to the sky as if Aiden could see, but then embarrassingly realized how stupid that was and just sat on the floor with it. “I had a really good time that day, although I doubt my stupid back would let me skate anymore.” Lukas kept his cane in the car out of fear Axel or Jesse would find it, even though he sure could use it for walking around the house.
“Do you know? I mean. About the cane.” He cleared his throat, straining his ears to hear something. But all he heard was the deadly ring. “Here let me-” Lukas dug in his nightstand and dug his pendulum out. It seemed to be less scary by the day. He asked the question again and it swung rapidly back and forth. “Well, cat’s out the bag I guess. Haha.”
Why was he so awkward? He guessed it was because he was talking to thin air. He made sure to whisper so Axel wouldn’t hear. Clearing his throat he asked another question, “What’re your thoughts on it. You know I’m not faking it right?” The pendulum stood still and he sighed. “I know the Ouija board was probably easier but. I refuse to touch that thing.”
He closed his eyes and held the crystal close, rubbing his finger on the grooves. There had to be a better way to talk to Aiden than this but he needed to be slow. “I wish you didn’t hurt my head so much when you were around. I guess at the very least it’s a sign you’re real.” He wondered if he went to a doctor if he would be diagnosed with tinnitus but another doctor's appointment was the last thing he needed right now. He lay on the floor for a while, taking in Aiden’s strong presence. It felt like he was being ripped out of his body at times. But he wasn’t angry, he knew this was Aiden’s only way of communicating.
It was silent until his phone chimed. He went on his knees and grabbed the phone off his bed. “Why are you up so early?” It was Jesse. Somehow it was 7. Had he been meditating for that long? He decided to call him.
The phone rang a couple of times until he heard a groggy voice on the other end. “Hello?”
“Jesse. Hi.” Lukas was smiling like a child. “I miss you.”
“I missed you too baby. But it's so early.”
“I know, I couldn’t sleep.”
“How come?”
He thought about how much he wanted to reveal to his boyfriend. How do you say your dead friend was haunting your dreams and waking life? “Weird dream.”
“Hm.” Luckily he didn’t ask about it. “I need to get ready for college.”
“Wait-” Lukas was desperate to talk to someone. “I wanted to tell you about this thing I got.”
He heard Jesse get up and start to walk around. “Okay, let me put headphones in. But just know I’m getting ready.”
He nodded then forgot Jesse couldn’t see him. “It’s called a pendulum. I got it a week ago actually. It’s a way to… communicate with the universe I guess? It can answer yes/no questions. It’s a little crystal hanging on a chain, you just hold it.”
“Communicate with the universe, interesting.” The call went quiet for a moment. “Does the universe know if I have blue underwear on?”
“Let me ask” Lukas repeated the question in his head and the pendulum shook side to side. “No?”
“Looks like your pendulum is wrong.”
Lukas felt a little saddened by this. It was always accurate before. Was that Aiden fucking with him? Now that he noticed, he hadn’t felt anything ringing in his ears. “I swear its usually right-”
“Baby, I’m sure your spiritual stuff is cool. I’m happy you’re getting into it. But it’s not really for me. Besides, it’s easy to manipulate that stuff. Your hand might be shaking.”
He didn’t really know what to say. “Yeah. Right.”
“I really have to go now okay? I love you, have a good day.”
Lukas wished him the same and they hung up. If his boyfriend wasn’t going to support him, it seemed like Petra was the only person he could turn to. Hopefully Aiden wouldn't take offense to that. Not that he really ever liked Jesse to begin with.
An overwhelming smell of smoke overcame him, he wasn’t sure where it was coming from. He got up slowly and creeked in the hallway. Axel’s door was shut. Was something on fire? He went to the kitchen. The smoke alarm was on but it wasn't beeping. Nothing was cooking. He kept venturing around the apartment until he heard footsteps.
“Are you out of your mind pacing around the room like that?”
Lukas froze. “I’m sorry. I smell smoke.”
“Smoke?” He took a deep inhale. “I don’t smell anything.”
“I know I smell it Axel, Oh god, I hope it’s not our neighbors.” He felt anxiety spike in his chest.
“I’m sure it’s nothing. But I’ll look around to see if I smell it anywhere.”
Lukas let out a sigh of relief. “Thanks.”