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The morning after being discharged, Sadie wakes up alone in Ethan’s bed. She frowns before getting out of bed and going to find Ethan. He’s in the kitchen making a pot of tea when he sees her come out of the bedroom wearing one of his hoodies. She quietly sits down on one of the stools at the kitchen island and Ethan comes around and kisses the top of her head.
“Good morning, sweetheart,” Ethan says. “How are you feeling?”
“Physically, I’m okay,” Sadie mumbles. “Emotionally… I don’t know.”
Ethan sits beside her and places his hand on hers. “Is there anything I can do to help?”
“I don’t think so.” The tea kettle whistles and Ethan stands up and grabs two mugs before pouring tea for the both of them. “Ethan?”
“Yes?” Ethan puts Sadie’s mug down in front of her.
“Do you… want kids?”
“I… do, but I’ve come to terms with the fact that I might not have any, so if you don’t want kids, that’s something I can live with,” Ethan reassures her.
“No, I want kids too, someday.” Sadie smiles. “To be honest, it would’ve been a deal breaker if you hadn’t.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. But I don’t want to have kids until I’ve finished my residency.”
“How long have you been thinking about this?” Ethan asks gently.
“I’ve known that I want kids for a long time,” Sadie says.
“But how long have you been thinking about having kids with me?” Ethan smiles.
“Oh, um… I don’t know,” Sadie confesses. “Probably since we did that emergency thoracotomy together on my first day. The way we saved that woman’s life? I was like, ‘damn, that’s hot,’” She jokes, causing Ethan to laugh. “I mean, we will have really pretty babies.” Sadie sighs. “At least… assuming we can have kids. What if there’s something wrong with me? What if that’s why I lost the baby?”
Ethan places his hand on top of Sadie’s. “When we’re ready, when you’re ready, we can try and if something goes wrong, we’ll look into other options.”
Sadie sighs, shaking her head, “I’m not even ready to have kids yet. I don’t know why I’m so worried about it.”
“This is something that means a lot to you. It’s natural to worry, especially after what you went through. You didn’t just lose a baby, you lost a fallopian tube too.” Ethan comes and hugs Sadie from behind and she leans against his chest.
“Yeah, you’re right,” Sadie says, her eyes closed. “Thank you for being so understanding.”
“Of course, sweetheart.” Ethan kisses the top of her head. “This is an incredibly difficult thing to go through; I just want to help in any way that I can.”
“Believe me, you are.”
♡♡♡
Ethan enters the bedroom to find Sadie sitting up in bed typing on her phone. “Who are you texting?” He asks.
“My roommates. They want to know where I’m staying,” Sadie sighs.
“Are you going to tell them?” Ethan sits down next to her.
“No.” Sadie shakes her head. “I know you don’t want people to know about us and honestly, I don’t really want to tell them yet myself. There’s just so much going on and I know they’re going to have a lot of questions and I just… don’t have the energy for it.” Sadie leans against Ethan as he wraps his arm around her and kisses her head.
“Does Sienna know you’re here?” Ethan asks.
“Yeah, she’s covering for me with everyone else.”
“If you really want to tell your friends about us, you can,” Ethan says.
Sadie looks at him and responds, “Are you sure?”
“As long as you trust them, yes.”
“I don’t really mind not telling them yet. And after what happened with Landry last year… trusting people is… hard.”
“Okay. Just let me know if you change your mind.” Ethan meets their lips together in a kiss and they lay back against the pillows. They lay together quietly for some time with Ethan raking his fingers through Sadie’s hair and Sadie listening to his heartbeat.
“How many kids do you think we’ll have?” Sadie asks, breaking the silence.
“Mmm, two, maybe three,” Ethan answers.
“Yeah? Girls or boys?”
“One of each. Why? What do you think?” Ethan looks down at Sadie.
“I think girls. We’ll have beautiful, brilliant baby girls.” Sadie looks up, meeting Ethan’s eyes with her own.
“Well, someday, we’ll have as many beautiful, brilliant babies as you want.”
Sadie giggles and snuggles deeper into Ethan’s chest. “You’re going to be an amazing dad.”
“And you’re going to be an amazing mom.” Ethan lifts Sadie’s chin up with his hand and kisses her lips. He tastes the honey from her tea earlier and it reminds him of how sweet Sadie is and how thankful he is to have her in his life. Sadie lays her head down against Ethan again and drifts off to sleep, while Ethan admires her, wondering when and how he grew to care about her so much.