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With the sun beginning to set on the horizon of Rakuzan's grounds, specially after the harsh training they just finished on the gym, Mibuchi Reo could only approach Sei-chan in fear.
He was, admittedly, bedazzled by his captain. With Sei-chan being so outstandingly efficient and so incredibly good at absolutely everything, it would be obtuse on his part not to do so; Sei-chan was deserving of respect and admiration, even if he was Reo's underclassman. His mind worked in complex, frightening patterns of cold indifference and and hunger for victory, to the point it filled Reo with the curiosity needed to follow and obey. In short, it was very hard not to focus on Akashi once you've met him.
That was true even before they were on the same school. The Generation of Miracles of the Teiko Basketball Team was a precedent in itself, and Mibuchi followed them closely with muted discomfort over his own uncrowning. Hayama and Nebuya didn't share his own interest, maybe out of bitterness or actual apathy, but they did ask him to know more about Akashi when it was disclosed he was coming to Rakuzan. It was clear even then that he would be an imposing figure, albeit none of them expected to follow orders from a first year so abruptly.
But perhaps Reo should have expected it. He knew what was said about Sei-chan, his overwhelming commanding nature and lack of tolerance over failures. He was just close enough of present, but always distant enough to be a mystery of his own thoughts and upbringing - Sei-chan seemed to be a captain, a president, a leader, and not anything else.
That was the reason as to why Reo wanted to approach him, and also why he feared. There was something lacking in Sei-chan that was hard to grasp, a bitter detachment that promised the sweetest rewards if it was somehow put aside. As much as Reo craved to be closer to Akashi and understand him better, he couldn't pinpoint whether there was someone for the student and fifteen year old Seijuro, a person by his side who understood him and gave him their support. If only Sei-chan let Reo, he would gladly take that place.
Sei-chan never mentioned his old teammates, unless when mentioning what they'd do for him and how they'd act. The most brought up was a boy named Tetsuya, since Sei-chan rejoiced on comparing how better was Mayuzumi over him. Reo felt a mixture of bad emotions every time it happened, both because he was afraid he would be remembered like that by Akashi and because of his own twisted joy over having no competition, which made him uncomfortable.
Would Sei-chan delimit such rigid estrangement to him too if Reo decided to try and become closer to him? Was Tetsuya and the other Miracles the closest thing Akashi had of friends, even now? Was he truly okay with destroying them on court, in such a desperate craving to do so that he made his team train to hell and back?
Reo needed to know, and he was willing to help in any way possible. He could only pray Akashi wouldn't push him away, and even more, that he would give him a piece of his heavily guarded mind.
"Sei-chan?", he asked cautiously. Akashi looked over the window, to the same beautiful sunset that painted his face with warm hues, and used a towel to clean his face of sweat.
"Yes, Reo?", he answered, not quite looking at him just yet. His eyes were fixed on the horizon, but his body moved to be directed to Mibuchi.
"I wanted to ask you something", Reo started. He gulped when Akashi's resplendent eyes finally made it to his face. "About your old teammates".
"Oh, please go on", he hummed, putting his towel down. He was always such a blessing for sore eyes.
"How do you feel over playing against them in the upcoming Winter Cup?", Reo tried to convey it as nonchalantly as his beating heart allowed. "Are you excited? Apprehensive?".
"Nothing of the sort", Sei-chan gave no emotional response. "We are meant to conclude which one of us is stronger. I am. There's no doubt about it, so all that's left is to make sure they take the games seriously".
"But you played with them for three years, right? Do you really feel nothing over going to court on different sides?", Mibuchi tried a different approach.
"You seem to misunderstand the point, Reo", Akashi reprimanded him with a hard stare, not yet a glare but certainly cold. "It's irrelevant who's by my side as long as things go according to my plans. I'm the winner, for I don't lose on anything. Humanitas hungers, I suppose, and it shall make every single thing move; my hunger is immense, so all on my path with find its demise if it goes against me".
Reo hurt. Still, he embraced the chance to understand Sei-chan better. "Humanitas? Hunger? What is this about?".
"Do you think you'd be able to understand?", Akashi arched an eyebrow. Reo hurt a bit more, but nodded anyway, and so the underclassman paused to collect his words.
"Humanitas is the principle of things", Seijuro concluded. "A hidden substance that is equal in every being. It's eternal, universal, indestructable, both in invisible and visible matter. It's this truth that's called Humanitas, since it summarizes the universe and the universe is humanity".
"How could it explain everything?", Reo asked. He wanted to know how this could relate to Sei-chan's neglect of his own feelings, but wouldn't dare say it out loud.
"It's simple. If every creature has Humanitas and in the same quantity, then any conflict comes from Humanitas correcting Humanitas. What drives this confrontation is nothing short of hunger, Humanitas' hunger; it is the reason anything progresses to begin with".
"So... Progress comes from conflict?", Mibuchi frowned.
"That's a crass way of putting it", Sei-chan crossed his arms. "When water boils, bubbles show up and pop over and over again, and yet they're always made from the same water. So is Humanitas. It's fundamentally irrelevant whose side loses, or which bubble pops, since the other one will always necessarily succeed and, at the end, all is made of the same. More importantly, it's essential that someone loses, so that there's progress made on the winning side over the consequences of its win. Every scientific advancement that came from tragedies is a great example of this".
"Are you saying that bad things are inherently good?", Reo looked to the side, trying to process Akashi's words. It was weird and he sprouted it out of nowhere.
"I'm saying that nothing ever stays for a prolonged way in peace", Seijuro changed his position so his weight would fall more on one of his legs. "My middle school team was no exception. The lack of an actual conflict between us made each and every one of us miserable. Our satisfaction must come only from our fight against one another, since that's the only mean we have to play reasonable games. All that's left is to see whose Humanitas can defeat the others, and this comes from Humanitas' hunger. I shall destroy every Humanitas that goes against mine, since I hunger more than anyone else".
"Should I consider you to be excited then?", Reo smiled somewhat awkwardly to Sei-chan.
"It's an urge, or a drive. There's no feelings involved on this", Akashi kept a neutral face, but Reo could feel just a slight irritation hidden there over his own apparent lack of understanding.
It was a bit too much for now. Reo needed time to classify what this way of comprehending life meant for Sei-chan, so he thanked his captain and walked away, back to his fellow second years who were sprawled on the ground. Was that why Sei-chan acted so alone? Did he see himself as a single unit who was constantly against everyone else and had to impose his own will? Why such an individualist and egotistical view?
He wouldn't have his answers until Tetsuya managed to pry Sei-chan's bitterness and show the sweetness Reo couldn't ever get.