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You Only Love Me When We're All Alone

Summary:

It was no news to him that his friend often treated him a little harshly, especially with others around. Usually, it just played into their game and it spurred Wooyoung on when it came to fucking Hongjoong senseless. But being treated like that after the fun was over? Was kind of not that much fun anymore.

Notes:

i'm back!!! i'm not gonna lie to you i was NOT up for writing this past week idk
but today? it suddenly hit me and i finished this woojoong wip that i've been wanting to write forever!!
it's slightly more plot-ridden than my other works are lmao but i hope i did it well (since it's what i do on my other acc where i'm not writing porn lmao)
forgive me for the angst i've spent entirely too much time listening to ed sheeran and 5sos while writing this....
i hope you like this!!

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

"Ahh, Wooyoung, fuck... harder–”

Hongjoong clung to Wooyoung’s shoulders as if his life depended on it, legs almost slipping from where they were wrapped around his waist. Wooyoung adjusted him in his arms, hoisting him up a little more before resuming his rapid pace, drilling his cock into Hongjoong’s hole.

“Fuck, Joongie... not gonna last...” he panted, burying his face into the crook of Hongjoong’s sweaty neck. Hongjoong’s fingers desperately gripped Wooyoung’s grown out hair in an attempt to ground himself, pulling hard on the strands.

Wooyoung’s hips stuttered at having his hair pulled and before Hongjoong knew it he was set down on the ground. He flipped him around and pressed him chest first into the door of his dorm room.

Hongjoong prayed that Wooyoung’s dorm mate wasn’t back yet...

Just as Hongjoong was about to complain about the emptiness inside him, Wooyoung grabbed his hips and shoved his cock back inside him. He held him down against the door, making it impossible for Hongjoong to fuck himself back on his dick and causing him to moan in frustration.

Wooyoung’s hand snuck around him to curl his fingers around Hongjoong’s cock, practically engulfing the whole thing with his hand as he jerked him off rapidly.

Hongjoong’s mouth fell open, his forehead hitting the wooden door with a soft thud. Heat was pooling in his gut, and he knew it would only be a matter of minutes, seconds, until he came.

As it turned out, Wooyoung broke first though, filling up the condom with a broken moan, his thrusts growing shallow as he rode out his orgasm. His hand never seized its movements on Hongjoong’s cock, though.

“Cum for me, Joongie...” he rasped into his ear and who was Hongjoong to refuse. He shook through his orgasm, painting the wooden door white with his cum as Wooyoung continued to stroke him through it. 

“Fuck...” Hongjoong panted. He winced when Wooyoung slowly pulled out of him and slumped against the door as Wooyoung discarded the soiled condom in his trash can.

“That... was so necessary,” Wooyoung noted, still mildly out of breath. Hongjoong could only nod in agreement. Exam season had been kicking their asses, and they had been so wound up in everything, they had both craved a little stress relief.

“I should get going, though,” Hongjoong said, picking up his strewn around clothes and heading over to Wooyoung’s untouched bed with shaky knees, to put them back on.

Wooyoung only pulled on a pair of boxers and ran a hand through his sweaty dark hair. Hongjoong had to avert his gaze in order not to get distracted by the gesture.

“Don’t you want lunch first? I was going to cook. We could throw in a movie if you like,” Wooyoung offered.

Hongjoong gave Wooyoung a pointed look as he pulled up his jeans. He slipped into his shirt, buttoning it up halfway before he finally spoke: “This isn’t a date, Woo.”

“I didn’t say it was. Friends watch movies together too, you know,” Wooyoung retorted, sounding defensive. “But whatever, have it your way.”

Hongjoong got to his feet, legs still a little wobbly, but he managed to stay upright. He shot Wooyoung a half smile without acknowledging his previous words. “I’ll see you later at Seonghwa’s.”

He heard Wooyoung sigh as he turned around and left his friend’s room. Wooyoung’s dormmate sat on the couch in the living area with a bowl of popcorn, eyes focused on the TV. He only regarded Hongjoong with a nod as he walked by and Hongjoong tried not to let his absolute devastation show at the fact that the guy had probably been here the entire time.

In his defense, though, he and Wooyoung had been rather preoccupied after coming back here from their history exam. It had been the last one this term and Wooyoung had given him that look when they had walked out of the lecture hall. He didn’t know whether his dormmate had really heard everything, and he didn’t want to know.

Hongjoong made a quick exit and headed to his own dorm where he fell back on his bed, dozing off, despite still feeling filthy from this afternoon’s activities. He could just shower before he headed over to Seonghwa’s place later.

***

Seonghwa’s place served as their friend-group’s go-to hangout spot since it was the biggest and he didn’t have a roommate. Wooyoung decided to forgo lunch after Hongjoong had taken off, settling on ordering an extra-large pizza at Seonghwa’s later.

Truth be told, he felt a little bummed out after Hongjoong had left. It was no news to him that his friend often treated him a little harshly, especially with others around. Usually, it just played into their game and it spurred Wooyoung on when it came to fucking Hongjoong senseless. But being treated like that after the fun was over? Was kind of not that much fun anymore.

“You okay, bub?” San asked when Wooyoung plopped onto Seonghwa’s pristine leather couch next to him. His arm instantly found its way around Wooyoung’s shoulders, and he couldn’t help melting into his best friend’s comforting touch.

“Yeah, I’m fine, just tired.” It wasn’t particularly a lie. He had not gotten nearly enough sleep during exam season, and he hadn’t taken a nap after his little romp with Hongjoong earlier. Besides, his best friend was warm and broad, and he just made the perfect pillow for Wooyoung.

“Exams were a bitch, weren’t they,” San said with a little chuckle, rubbing his arm gently. “But you can get some rest now. Nap a little if you like. The others won’t be here for at least 20 more minutes.”

Wooyoung nodded sleepily and it didn’t take much more for him to doze off. He could still faintly hear his surroundings; Seonghwa entering the room, followed by him and San speaking in hushed tones about how tired they thought Wooyoung looked. The background noise lulled him into a deeper slumber and soon his head was resting in San’s lap while his friend’s pet his hair like he was a kitten.

He eventually woke up when Yeosang and Jongho entered the apartment, all too familiar with the passcode and rambunctious as always. They quieted down when they saw Wooyoung sleeping, but it was already too late. He opened his eyes blearily and sat up, giving them a tried smile.

“Hey,” he greeted them.

“You okay?” Yeosang asked, looking slightly concerned. “You look–”

“Like shit, apparently. I know. I heard these two discuss it at length,” Wooyoung said jokingly, nodding at San and Seonghwa.

San nudged him playfully. “We did not say it like that!”

Jongho snorted and took a seat on San’s other side, sinking back into the softness of the couch. “How were exams for you guys?”

San let out a groan and ran his hand over his eyes in frustration. “Don’t even start, I feel like I did a terrible job.” Wooyoung smiled faintly at his dramatic friend. He placed a hand on San’s thigh, patting it a few times, earning himself a pout.

“You probably did great, Sannie, you always get too in your head about stuff only for you to score super high,” Yeosang pointed out, practically taking the words out of Wooyoung’s mouth. San’s pout intensified and he grumbled something about ‘not being taken seriously’ but Wooyoung side-hugged him and Yeosang ruffled his hair, instantly making a smile take over his face.

Yunho’s voice sounded from the doorway, closely followed by Hongjoong’s and moments later, the two of them entered the living room in deep conversation about something art related. Hongjoong had been taking Yunho along to a few museum visits lately and he had managed to get him properly hooked on all that boring stuff.

The bummed feeling in Wooyoung’s stomach returned when he was once again reminded of Hongjoong’s coldness earlier, especially now that he was having such a friendly discussion with Yunho. For the sake of the group, however, he decided to push that feeling aside. He was used to Hongjoong’s antics, after all.

Hell, Wooyoung liked to believe that he had even taught Hongjoong some of these antics before they had started fucking a month or two ago. Playing hard to get, giving your hookup the cold shoulder to make them want you more...

It wasn’t supposed to feel this shitty, though.

The two newcomers greeted the group and Yunho promptly wandered off and began looking around for Mingi, who wasn’t here yet. Wooyoung shot Hongjoong one of his cheeky grins when he caught him searching for a place to sit down. He opened his arms and patted his lap.

“You can sit here, Joongie,” he said with a teasing lilt in his voice.

Hongjoong regarded him blankly for a moment before he scoffed and went to sit down next to Seonghwa. Wooyoung tried not to let his shoulders droop in disappointment, as he brushed the exchange off as their usual banter. The others didn’t even bat an eye at Hongjoong’s behavior as this was usually how he treated any advances of physical affection.

At least outside of the bedroom, as Wooyoung had come to notice.

Their little thing had started out in a pretty random way a few weeks ago. They had been stressed out – as one usually was in university – and ended up making out after one of Seonghwa’s get-togethers had resulted in a little too much alcohol. As the night progressed, the two of them had realized ‘oh, seems like our kinks match up, let’s fuck’.

And the rest was history...

It was a much better habit to cope with stress than smoking, which was something Wooyoung had been trying to quit anyway.

On top of that, Wooyoung had hoped that the start of a physical relationship would result in Hongjoong warming up to him a little bit. It wasn’t like he hated Wooyoung, at least he hoped it wasn’t like that, but he just always seemed particularly averse to his clinginess and flirty nature.

Wooyoung hated that it messed with him so much.

So yeah, maybe part of his tiredness came from the way his relationship with Hongjoong was progressing in the opposite direction of what he had hoped for.

“Where’s Mingi?” Yunho asked with a pout when he came back from the kitchen.

“He said he was running late,” Seonghwa told him. “Get comfortable, we’re ordering soon. Mingi already told me what he wants.”

Yunho pouted but flopped down on the other couch with Seonghwa and Hongjoong, draping himself over their laps. Yeosang and Jongho had gotten comfortable in the matching armchair on the opposite side. Wooyoung and San were cuddling up on the middle couch again.

At least he was able to find some form of comfort in his best friend’s arms.

***

Mingi soon arrived and so did the pizza.

As the evening progressed, Wooyoung continued to sneak glances at Hongjoong who didn’t spare him a single one in return. He pretended like Wooyoung wasn’t even in the room while simultaneously laughing with Yunho or bickering with Yeosang.

“Hey, you okay?” San asked him quietly as to not raise the attention of the others.

“I’m fine...” Wooyoung waved off. There was no use in worrying his best friend with his silly feelings. Besides, Hongjoong had insisted they keep their thing to themselves. He would have loved to confide in San, but alas...

“Hongjoong, could you go get some more beer please? You’re closest to the door,” Seonghwa asked. Hongjoong frowned at his logic, as Seonghwa sat right next to him and therefore was not much further from the door but rose to his feet anyway.

Wooyoung saw his opportunity to finally get some time to properly talk to Hongjoong and jumped to his feet enthusiastically, startling San next to him.

“I’ll help you!”

Hongjoong looked at him for a moment, but didn’t decline, so Wooyoung followed him to the kitchen. Wooyoung opened the fridge and handed Hongjoong four bottles of beer before taking four himself, holding them between his fingers, two in each hand.

“Do you want to hang tomorrow? I’ll spend all of next week with my parents in Ilsan, so we won’t be able to do anything until I’m back...” Wooyoung said with practiced nonchalance as they made their way back to their friends.

Hongjoong shrugged. “I’ll see if I have time.”

It was the first time Hongjoong had spoken to him all evening, and he wasn’t even looking at him. Wooyoung tried not to be deterred and threw an arm around Hongjoong, making the bottles clink together.

“You’re always so aloof, Joongie. Admit it, you love spending time with me,” he teased as they entered the living room. Hongjoong glared at him and pushed his arm off. Wooyoung’s grip on the bottles slipped and they shattered on the ground.

“Dammit, Wooyoung!” Hongjoong exclaimed. “Do you always have to play around, look at this mess.”

Wooyoung was stunned at Hongjoong’s harsh tone, barely registering Seonghwa already shuffling over to take care of the mess. It wasn’t like he wasn’t used to Hongjoong’s sharp tongue, but usually it was meant in a sexier manner. He liked it when Hongjoong talked down to him in bed, had even said so before – but not like this.

“I– I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to...” he trailed off, shell-shocked.

Hongjoong only scoffed again and set down the rest of the bottles before helping Seonghwa with the glass shards. Wooyoung was still frozen in his spot which seemed to piss Hongjoong off even more.

“Can you stop being dumb and at least get something to mop this up?”

“Hongjoong!” San and Seonghwa exclaimed at the same time.

“You don’t have to be so harsh; he didn’t do it on purpose,” San continued.

Wooyoung really did feel dumb for the way tears were prickling in his eyes at being yelled at by his favorite hyung. San took pity on him and led him away from the mess as Yeosang and Jongho went to get cleaning supplies. He didn’t know why Hongjoong was so mad at him, but it stung to be treated like this by someone who had seemed so eager to be with him merely three hours ago.

“I’m sorry, Seonghwa...” he apologized quietly. Seonghwa gave him a reassuring smile as he gathered up the shards and threw them in the bin Jongho provided the next moment.

“Don’t beat yourself up, Woo. It happens.” He sent Hongjoong a stern look, which was pointedly ignored. San rubbed Wooyoung’s arm again, glaring at Hongjoong. Wooyoung almost smiled with how protective his best friend was over him, even when it came to their own friends.

“Yeah, um...” Wooyoung mumbled. “I don’t know why I’m so clumsy today. I should just go, I think.”

Hongjoong looked at him for a split second, raising his eyebrow at him. Wooyoung wasn’t sure how to interpret the look, but it sure wasn’t fond. Mingi, on the other hand, sat up straight at his words.

“You can’t go yet; your movie selection is up next.”

Wooyoung sent him a little smile. “You guys can just skip it. I’m not up for it anyway. Sorry for the trouble.” He gently pried San’s arm off him and got up, storming out of the room, and ignoring his friends calling after him.

It took two minutes after he had left the building for the first phone call to come in. Part of him hoped it was Hongjoong, explaining himself, apologizing, anything to explain why he was acting like this today...

But it was San, probably concerned about his quick exit.

When he didn’t pick up San’s call, he followed up with a few texts, asking him if he was okay, urging him to come back, even promising to kick Hongjoong’s ass. Wooyoung put his phone on silent and pocketed his phone.

He felt like an idiot for running away because Hongjoong had been a little mean to him, and he hated that he had probably ruined his friends’ night. But he couldn’t help it. And crying in front of his friends wasn’t an option either.

Wooyoung wiped his eyes in frustration. He couldn’t believe that he had started crying over this.

Oh, but it was no use. He could no longer deny that he had caught feelings for Hongjoong; maybe had even harbored them before they had started their thing.

He liked the push and pull they had going on, the teasing words, followed by eager tongues and wandering hands. Wooyoung had never much minded the way Hongjoong pretended he didn’t like him very much when they were around their friends. Still, he had never been outright cold and mean to Wooyoung before.

Can you stop being dumb...

Hongjoong had said the words with so much venom in his voice, like he actually hated Wooyoung. And who knew, maybe he did. Hongjoong was the complete opposite of an open book; Wooyoung couldn’t read him at all.

And it was eating at him. Not knowing how Hongjoong felt about him; if he felt anything at all or if he was just using Wooyoung as a glorified sex toy.

Wooyoung made his way home, ignoring his dormmate and his girlfriend passionately going at it on the living room couch, as he headed into his room and dove under his covers, ready to wallow in self-pity for the rest of the evening.

***

Surprisingly, Hongjoong did end up contacting Wooyoung the next day. His message read ‘I’m free at two... come to my studio if you want...’

Wooyoung stared at the text for a solid two minutes. Hongjoong was acting like nothing had happened the day before. Had this really just been part of the game? Of Hongjoong’s usual harsh personality? Had Wooyoung simply overreacted?

He checked the time. Half past one. If he wanted to make it in time, he had better hurry. He got up and ran a comb through his hair before changing into a new shirt, just to be sure.

Hongjoong’s studio was located halfway across campus, so it took him a while to get there. Of course, he found Hongjoong sitting in his chair, headphones on his ears and staring at the screen in front of him. He never stopped working, even when they were supposed to have some time off.

“Hey,” Wooyoung greeted him, putting a hand on his shoulder to make his presence known.

Hongjoong spun around in his chair, looking up at him. “Hey.”

Wooyoung fidgeted, unsure of how to go forth with things. Hongjoong wasn’t glaring at him today which was a huge improvement from yesterday. But he also didn’t say anything else.

Should Wooyoung bring it up?

“Um, so... what are you working on?” he asked awkwardly.

Hongjoong chuckled and put his headphones aside. “Nothing special. I figured I could use a break.”

“Good idea. You work too hard,” Wooyoung agreed, hating how awkward he sounded. “So, um... about yester–”

Hongjoong didn’t let him get any further and simply reached out to grab Wooyoung’s hips, pulling him into his lap and kissing him. Wooyoung couldn’t find it in himself to protest. Hongjoong's lips felt too good on his.

Hongjoong’s hands didn’t stay still either, instantly wandering under Wooyoung’s shirt, pulling it over his head. Wooyoung stared back at him, lips parted and wet with saliva. He knew he probably shouldn’t indulge Hongjoong until they talked about what had transpired yesterday, but god, how he loved to see him ruffled.

“Couch...” was all he said, scrambling off Hongjoong’s lap and dragging him along to the small couch on the opposite side of the room. Hongjoong smirked and pushed Wooyoung to sit before he dropped to his knees and settled between his spread thighs.

Wooyoung was half-convinced he was still asleep and dreaming.

Hongjoong on his knees was always a sight to behold. His small hands fumbled with Wooyoung’s fly, making a frustrated little noise when it wouldn’t open right away. Wooyoung chuckled and ran his hand through Hongjoong’s short blonde hair, pulling slightly and earning himself a half-hearted glare. He preferred that one over the looks from yesterday by a long shot.

Finally, the zipper gave way and Hongjoong wasted no time pulling down the pants and boxers off to reach for Wooyoung’s half-hard cock. Hongjoong gave him a challenging look, as he often did when he was about to take cock. It was like Wooyoung had told him he couldn’t, when he knew damn well how good Hongjoong was at it.

Still, he always seemed to face the challenge with vigor.

Wooyoung’s head fell back with a groan when Hongjoong licked a stripe from the base to the head of his cock.

“Look at me,” Hongjoong demanded. Wooyoung complied, biting his lip as he watched Hongjoong wrap his hand around the base of his cock, making it harden fully in his grip. It looked so big in Hongjoong’s small hand, and the mere thought made him twitch. Hongjoong scoffed, lips twisting into a smirk before he finally sank down on Wooyoung’s cock.

“Fuck...” Wooyoung cursed quietly. Hongjoong’s mouth was so warm around him; he used his hand to jerk him off where he couldn’t reach as his tongue flicked over the sensitive veins on the underside of Wooyoung’s dick. “God, Joongie, you’re– fuck...”

Hongjoong sank down further, throat constricting a little upon the intrusion, but he didn’t let that deter him. He pulled off again, giving some attention to the head with his tongue while his free hand cupped and massaged his balls. Wooyoung’s grip tightened on Hongjoong’s short strands as his tip caught on Hongjoong’s lips again, staining them with pre-cum.

Hongjoong wrapped his lips around the tip of his cock, tonguing over the slit a few times before he sank down again and started bobbing his head in earnest. Wooyoung gasped, hips moving up on their own accord. Hongjoong hummed around his cock, encouraging Wooyoung to keep up his movements.

He held Hongjoong’s head in place and began to thrust up into his mouth, relishing in the way his eyes teared up and glazed over.

Hongjoong loved having his throat used, and Wooyoung loved making him cry like this. He shoved his cock in further, causing Hongjoong to gag a little as he began to fuck his face a little harder, mindful as to not actually hurt him. Hongjoong’s hands lost their focus on his balls, now helplessly grabbing onto his thighs to steady himself, blunt nails digging into the supple flesh.

Wooyoung felt himself getting closer to the edge, a tight coil of heat pooling in his gut as he took in the obscene wet sounds of Hongjoong taking his cock down his throat. Part of him wanted to go harder, make him pay for his words the previous day, but he got so lost in the feeling of that perfect mouth around him, he couldn’t bring himself to be overly mean.

“Gonna cum,” he warned, pushing Hongjoong’s head down as he snapped and shot his cum down his throat, making him swallow every last drop of it. Hongjoong whined as he took what Wooyoung gave him, his throat bobbing as he swallowed his release.

Finally, Wooyoung pulled him off his cock again, letting him take a few deep breaths. A few droplets of cum were staining Hongjoong’s full lips so he swooped him up into his lap and kissed him, tasting himself in his mouth. Hongjoong groaned into his mouth, hips rolling downward to rut on his thigh, desperate to get off too.

Wooyoung smirked into the kiss and grabbed his hips, stopping his movements. Hongjoong whined petulantly at being denied, but his dismay was short-lived. Wooyoung pulled Hongjoong’s shirt over his head, breaking the kiss momentarily and switched their positions as he all but threw him down on the couch.

Wooyoung hovered over him, nuzzling his face against Hongjoong’s left pec before he sucked the nipple into his mouth. Hongjoong’s back arched as Wooyoung’s tongue flicked over the hardened bud.

“Woo– fuck,” Hongjoong panted.

Wooyoung gently nibbled on his nipple before pulling off and promptly giving the other one the same attention. Hongjoong writhed underneath him. Not satisfied with just sucking on his nipple, Wooyoung used his hands to squeeze the pecs, groaning at how they practically filled his hands.

“Woo... I need more, fuck...” Hongjoong said, trailing off with a high-pitched moan when Wooyoung bit him a little harder than intended. “Give me more...”

“So bossy...” Wooyoung murmured into his skin, but he finally let off his tits and moved further down, stopping once again to gently bite the soft flesh of his tummy, and flicking his tongue over Hongjoong’s belly button piercing.

He would usually spend a great deal of time worshipping the little jewel adorning Hongjoong’s flat tummy, but Hongjoong was getting impatient, and quite frankly, so was he. His dick was already coming back to life again and he needed to feel Hongjoong in some way soon.

He got rid of Hongjoong’s loose pants, grabbing onto his thighs. He spread them further, sinking his teeth into the soft flesh of his inner thigh, making Hongjoong choke out a gasp. His little cock was hard and flushed, begging for Wooyoung’s attention, but he couldn’t help himself at the sight of his milky thighs. He needed to leave some marks there as Hongjoong only allowed them where they weren’t visible to others.

Wooyoung sucked an almost alarming number of hickeys into his thighs until Hongjoong was reduced to whimpers of his name mixed in with desperate please to give him more.

“Fuck me...” he begged.

“Don’t have condoms,” Wooyoung replied, still trailing kisses up his thigh, moving in the direction of his cock. Hongjoong groaned in frustration.

“I’m out too...”

“We’ll make do somehow.” He sat up and looked down at Hongjoong. “Lube?”

Hongjoong was panting, his skin flushed and covered in Wooyoung’s marks. “Drawer...”

Wooyoung got up, crossing the room to Hongjoong’s desk, opening the drawer, and pulling out a half-used bottle of lube. He gave Hongjoong a look but was rewarded with a defiant scoff. He smirked and went back to join Hongjoong on the couch. He looked so perfectly debauched, Wooyoung couldn’t wait to get his hands on him.

Not wasting any more time, Wooyoung coated his fingers in lube, rubbing them together to warm them up as he got comfortable between Hongjoong’s thighs again.

“Jesus, hurry the fuck up,” Hongjoong urged him. “If you can’t fuck me, at least–”

Wooyoung cut him off by prodding at his entrance, inserting his first finger. It was his turn to scoff when it went in with surprising ease.

“Whatever do you get up to in here, Joongie? During work hours? How naughty of you,” he taunted him, already adding the second. It was met with slightly more resistance, and he chuckled. “Your little fingers can’t do the job right, can they?”

“Shut up,” Hongjoong shot back, his cheeks flushing.

“Is this how you should talk to someone who’s giving you what you want?” Wooyoung asked, curling his fingers once, the smirk almost falling off his face when Hongjoong’s ass clenched around him, almost sucking his fingers in. “Practically pounced on me, couldn’t wait to get my cock down your throat and now you’re making more demands?”

“You seem to need the guidance,” Hongjoong fired back.

Wooyoung laughed darkly, scissoring his fingers inside Hongjoong for a few more moments before finally adding the third. “God, I wish I could fuck you. You don’t run your mouth quite as much when you have a dick filling you up.”

“You talk like your dick can actually fill me up good...” Hongjoong retorted with a scoff, rolling his hips down in an attempt to get Wooyoung’s fingers deeper inside of him. Wooyoung scowled at the remark and pulled his fingers out. Hongjoong whined at the loss. “Wooyoung...”

“What?” Wooyoung asked in mock-cluelessness. “What do you need, Joongie? Since I can’t fill you up well, what could you possibly want from me?”

Hongjoong looked at him through wide eyes, grabbing at his wrist. “Didn’t mean it... need your fingers, please... it’s so empty...”

“I can just get you the plug if you want to feel full,” Wooyoung continued, making a move to get up but Hongjoong sat up and dragged him back down, kissing him. His legs wrapped around Wooyoung’s waist, their hard cocks brushing together when he grinded upwards against him.

Wooyoung faltered, this close to throwing caution to the wind and fucking Hongjoong raw. He let Hongjoong rut against him desperately, licking into his mouth and digging his nails into his shoulders.

He almost lost his composure listening to Hongjoong’s desperate moans as he let him use him to get off. Finally, he couldn’t stand it anymore and wrapped his hand around both of them, fascinated by how Hongjoong’s dick dwarfed compared to his as he began jerking them off together. Hongjoong’s back arched off the bed and his head fell back onto the armrest of the couch.

“Close, close, close...” he babbled as Wooyoung’s hand sped up its movements.

“Me too...” Wooyoung panted, speeding up a little.

Hongjoong came with a loud gasp, his cock twitching in Wooyoung’s hand as spurts of cum painted his stomach. Wooyoung groaned at the sight, following right behind him, adding to the mess on Hongjoong’s body.

He would have given anything to take a picture, capture him like this, all fucked out and pretty, covered in cum...

He sat up again, looking around for tissues. Luckily, Hongjoong had some on his desk as well, almost prompting him to ask him again what exactly he got up to in here. Though he could hardly fault him. There was a certain appeal to having a soundproof studio to oneself.

Hongjoong had already sat back up when Wooyoung came back with the tissues. He took a few from Wooyoung’s hands instead of letting himself get cleaned up. Wooyoung dismissed that with a shrug and wiped himself down, before reaching for his discarded boxers and jeans.

“Thanks for the break,” Hongjoong told him. He, too, began to get dressed again.

Wooyoung looked at him, still shirtless. “Can we talk now?”

“No. I have to get back to work...” Hongjoong declined, making his way back to his desk chair. Wooyoung frowned.

“I thought you said you weren’t working on anything special,” he pointed out. Hongjoong gave him a look and demonstratively put his headphones back on his ears, turning to his computer. Wooyoung’s features hardened at being so blatantly ignored. He turned on his heel and left the studio, granted, slamming the door a little harder than necessary.

Hongjoong had used him again.

How could he have been so stupid?

With one last glance at the studio door, Wooyoung made his way back to his dorm, angry at Hongjoong, but more at himself for having so little self-respect.

***

Hongjoong would most likely kill Wooyoung once he found out he had told San about them, but he couldn’t care less at the moment. He needed someone to talk to and he knew that San wouldn’t tell anybody else. Nor would he judge him.

Still, he couldn’t help but feel mildly embarrassed about crying on his best friend’s shoulder.

“I just don’t understand why he won’t talk to me...” Wooyoung said with a sniffle. San rubbed his shoulder comfortingly, a lasting crease formed between his eyebrows. “We’re friends with benefits, aren’t we? Why is he treating me like a... like a...”

“Hooker. He’s treating you like a hooker.” San’s blunt words stung a little, but he couldn’t deny that his best friend was kind of right. “Wooyoungie... this isn’t healthy, you know. At first, I thought you two had gotten into a fight when he treated you like that at Seonghwa’s the other day...”

Wooyoung sniffled again. “If he hates me so much, I don’t know why he keeps sleeping with me... and I don’t understand why I can’t just stop sleeping with him.”

“Woo... I hate to be the bearer of bad news...” San trailed off, “but I think you might be in love...”

Wooyoung sat up to stare back at him. Sure, he had been aware that he had caught feelings for Hongjoong, but love? That was pushing it a little. Wasn’t it?

“Oh, god...” he whispered, burying his face in his hands, “I’m in love with him...”

San pulled him into a proper hug. “It’s gonna be okay, Wooyoungie...”

“How? He clearly hates me... I never felt more used than I did the other day. I don’t know how to go on with this...” Wooyoung agonized. The thing was, Hongjoong had reached out to him afterwards, asking whether Wooyoung was free, or whether he wanted to come to the studio again, but Wooyoung hadn’t gotten himself to respond this time.

“You’re not gonna wanna hear this,” San told him, “but maybe you shouldn’t go on with it.”

Wooyoung paused to look at him. San only gave him a pointed look and he sighed, slumping back against the backrest of the couch, wiping his eyes before letting his arms fall to his side. San was right, he knew he was. But he couldn’t imagine going up to Hongjoong and telling him he wanted to stop hooking up because he had stupidly caught feelings.

His phone buzzed in his pocket, making him jump before he pulled it out. He scoffed in disbelief when he read Hongjoong’s text: ‘You’ve been quiet lately... let me know when you’re free...’

Wooyoung was suddenly overcome with an onslaught of anger again. He remembered their last encounter, how used he had felt, how much it had hurt to be cast aside like a used towel. Hongjoong didn’t even seem to be aware that he was hurting his feelings.

In his anger, Wooyoung opened their chat and typed a quick reply: ‘Don’t contact me anymore.’

His finger hovered over the block contact moment long enough to catch Hongjoong’s reply in the form of a single question mark before he gave in and pressed it.

This person can no longer send direct messages to you.

“I blocked him...” Wooyoung whispered.

“Good,” San said, throwing his arm back around Wooyoung’s shoulder. “I’m glad you’re going home on Monday. It’ll do you some good to get away from this for a bit...”

Wooyoung nodded in agreement. He felt like a hug from his mother might just be what he needed. He eyed his phone, still in his hand, wondering whether Hongjoong would bother to seek him out when he noticed that Wooyoung had blocked him. Would he care? Or would he just replace him?

Since Wooyoung seemed so disposable to him, he assumed it would be the latter.

“A cigarette would be nice right now...”

***

“Oh, my darling...” was the first thing Wooyoung’s mother greeted him with when she opened the door. He practically melted into her hug, feeling the weight of everything briefly lifting off his chest. He hadn’t seen her in way too long...

***

Hongjoong was beyond confused, to say the least.

Not only had Wooyoung been ignoring him for almost two weeks; he had also blocked him on every platform he could think of. Asking San about it at their next get-together had resulted in an angry glare. Seonghwa had to calm him down by putting a hand on his biceps, otherwise Hongjoong was 97% sure he would have gotten decked in the face.

“If you don’t know why Wooyoung is avoiding you, there’s something seriously wrong with you,” San spat, looking uncharacteristically furious. Seonghwa sent him a warning look and took his hand, leading him into the kitchen, probably to talk him down. Hongjoong shot confused looks at Jongho and Yeosang who had watched the exchange with raised eyebrows.

Yeosang leaned forward, resting his arms on his knees as he gave Hongjoong an intent look. “I don’t know what’s going on between you and Wooyoung, but I know it’s something. And you’ve been treating him pretty shitty lately if I may remind you of our last movie night. Maybe it’s got something to do with that.”

“Yeah, have you apologized?” Jongho threw in.

“For what?” Hongjoong exclaimed. “We always talk like that; it’s never been a problem before!”

Jongho frowned. “He seemed upset, though. He left pretty quickly, after all. And it seemed... I don’t know, it seemed like you meant it.”

“I didn’t!” Hongjoong exclaimed. He got to his feet and started pacing. Did Wooyoung really think that Hongjoong disliked him? He wasn’t the best at expressing his feelings, which was why he wanted to keep things down to friends with benefits with Wooyoung in the first place. He hadn’t even realized that he had apparently hurt his feelings...

Sure, he hadn’t failed to notice that Wooyoung seemed clingier than usual, wanting to spend extra time with Hongjoong, teasing him more openly when they were with the others. And Hongjoong had noticed his own feelings for Wooyoung shifting in response. But he had attributed Wooyoung’s behavior to their games... so he had responded by being defensive and harsh.

Perhaps too harsh, as he now realized.

“I’m an idiot...”

“No shit,” San announced when he reentered the room, Seonghwa still holding his hand.

Hongjoong gave San a pleading look. “I know I messed up, okay? I didn’t mean to...”

“Should have thought of that beforehand. You were using him, Hongjoong. Do you realize that?” San asked. Hongjoong lowered his head as he did, in fact, start to realize how wrong his behavior had been.

Curse him for being so emotionally constipated...

“Babe, I think he got it,” Seonghwa gently reprimanded San.

“When will he be back?” Hongjoong questioned.

San only continued to glare at him, but Yeosang didn’t seem quite as upset with him. Maybe because, contrary to San from what it seemed, Yeosang didn’t know all the details.

“He’ll come back tomorrow afternoon. Don’t glare at me, Choi San, you know I’m not scared of you!”

San crossed his arms over his chest and slumped down on the couch. He refused to talk to Hongjoong for the rest of the evening, which resulted in their movie night being more than just tense.

Hongjoong knew he had to apologize to Wooyoung. Not just because he missed him so badly...

But something told him it wouldn’t be that easy. If San’s behavior told him anything, it was that he had really messed with Wooyoung’s feelings.

He had no idea how to make this right...

***

Wooyoung dreaded coming home after getting a text from San, telling him that Hongjoong knew why he was ignoring him and that Yeosang had told him when he was coming back. He took an earlier train, albeit reluctantly, to get back before his announced time. He locked himself in his dorm, telling his dormmate that he wasn’t available for anyone, if they asked.

Maybe he should have stayed with his parents longer. His mother really had managed to make him feel better, instantly catching on to his heartbreak and giving him love and comfort throughout his entire stay. Now that he was back here, alone, it all wore off and he began to feel the same kind of hurt he had felt before he had left.

More than once, he had contemplated unblocking Hongjoong and talking to him again, but an inner voice – one that sounded suspiciously like San – had advised him against it.

Wooyoung jumped when the doorbell rang. He hoped that it was just his dormmates’ girlfriend, but he was disappointed when he heard him open and say something only for Hongjoong’s voice to answer.

A moment later a soft knock sounded on Wooyoung’s door, making him roll his eyes. Curse his dormmate.

“Wooyoung, can you open the door, please?”

Wooyoung remained silent. He probably looked like shit from his journey and – well, just in general lately. He couldn’t speak to Hongjoong right now. He’d probably get swayed and sleep with him again...

“Wooyoung... I’m only here to talk, I promise.”

Now you wanna talk, huh?” Wooyoung snapped before he could stop himself. “Or is that just code for fucking again?”

He heard Hongjoong sigh on the other side of the door. “Open up please?”

Wooyoung glared at the door. “No, go away.”

“I’ll stay out here all night if I have to. I don’t think your dormmate cares, and you know I don’t sleep much anyway,” Hongjoong said. Wooyoung could hear that he was attempting to keep his tone lighthearted, but he was failing.

With a huff, Wooyoung got up and all but ripped open his door. “What the fuck, Hongjoong? Piss off, I clearly don’t want to talk to you!”

Hongjoong seemed undeterred and weaseled into Wooyoung’s room before he could shut the door in his face.

“Oh my god, you’ve got to be kidding me,” Wooyoung mumbled under his breath. “Can’t you take a hint?”

“Clearly not, or we wouldn’t even be in this situation right now,” Hongjoong retorted, causing Wooyoung to raise his eyebrow. Had he finally gained some self-awareness? “I just want you to hear me out, okay?”

“I don’t want to hear you out. I’m tired, so just spare me and find a new dick to jump on,” Wooyoung spat.

“I’m sorry, Wooyoung, okay?”

Wooyoung huffed in disbelief. “No, it’s not okay! I know we were never the closest of friends to begin with, but I didn’t know you fucking hated me this much. But I got it now, message received! Can you just leave me alone now?”

Hongjoong took a step towards him. “I don’t hate you, Wooyoung. I’m sorry for how I acted, really...”

“Whatever, Hongjoong–”

“No, seriously... I’m bad with feelings. Really bad. And that’s no excuse for how I treated you but I just... I miss you,” Hongjoong told him. It looked like it was taking a great ounce of strength to get it out. Wooyoung was aware that Hongjoong didn’t usually like discussing his feelings but that didn’t mean it would just erase how he had felt these past few weeks.

And besides, he couldn’t even be sure that Hongjoong was being sincere right now.

“You miss my dick, you mean...” he said accusingly.

“No, asshole, I miss you!” Hongjoong snapped with a frown. Wooyoung raised his eyebrow at him. Hongjoong, realizing his temper had won over again, brought his hand up to his forehead and exhaled in frustration. “Sorry... I...”

Wooyoung snorted at his outburst but said nothing and sat down on his bed. Hongjoong fidgeted uneasily, clearly unsure what to do with himself. Wooyoung wordlessly scooted over and Hongjoong timidly came to sit next to him, bringing up his legs to cross them underneath himself.

A few moments of silence overcame them.

“Can we be okay again?” Hongjoong eventually asked.

Wooyoung finally looked at him. Hongjoong looked so small, folded into himself, looking at Wooyoung with big, almost pleading eyes. Part of him wanted to wrap Hongjoong up in a blanket and kiss him senseless. But another part of him remembered the cold looks and the even colder words Hongjoong had thrown at him.

“I want us to be. I really do. But I can’t be friends with benefits with you anymore. I don’t know if I can be anything with you anymore. It’s taking too much of a toll. I followed you around like a puppy and you treated me like dirt. Not just that time at Seonghwa’s but before and afterwards too. At first, I thought it was just part of the game, but it doesn’t feel like that anymore. I felt... cheap, Hongjoong. Really fucking cheap.”

Hongjoong lowered his head, seeming for a moment like he wanted to say something, but he remained quiet, so Wooyoung went on.

“What I would like to know is why.”

“Why what?” Hongjoong asked, looking at him confusedly.

“Why did you choose to start sleeping with me if you can’t even stand me?” Wooyoung clarified, averting his gaze now, to look at his hands in his lap.

“Wha– Wooyoung... you make it sound like I hate you. I get that I can be an ass, but that’s not... I don’t...” He made a frustrated noise. “You’re my friend, Wooyoung.”

Wooyoung couldn’t hold back the scoff at his words.

“Friends don’t call each other dumb... not like that. Not like they mean it.”

Hongjoong scooted the slightest bit closer, though he refrained from touching Wooyoung. “I’m sorry for that. I was a particular ass that day...”

“Why?”

Hongjoong fell silent again. Wooyoung was beginning to lose his patience. This was going nowhere. He rolled his eyes and got off the bed.

If Hongjoong wasn’t going to leave, he would.

“Just forget it. I’m... I gotta not be here,” he said and exited his room. Wooyoung made it as far as their living area when Hongjoong caught up with him.

“Wait, please...” he pleaded. Wooyoung stopped in his tracks and turned to face Hongjoong, crossing his arms over his chest and giving him and expectant look. “I freaked out, okay? You... you were talking about watching movies, and spending quality time together all of a sudden. And like you said, we weren’t that close before, so I guess I read too much into it and my gay little brain couldn’t handle it...”

Wooyoung opened his mouth to speak, but Hongjoong held up his hand to stop him.

“Please, if I don’t say all of this now, I never will...” He waited for Wooyoung to nod in acknowledgment before he carried on: “Look, all the guys I’ve dated in the past let me down, or they didn’t get me, or they just weren’t patient enough to get through to me. I never wanted us to go down that road if we were to become more than friends. At first, I didn’t know why I was so dead set on shutting you out instead of just trying and failing to turn this into more like I have so many times. But now, I get it. It’s because I fucking love you, and I didn’t know how to tell you or how to deal with it, because I’m an emotionally constipated asshole whose only displayable emotion seems to be anger. I have issues, Wooyoung. And I didn’t want to put you through that, but I ended up doing it anyway. And I’m sorry...”

He was crying, Wooyoung noticed. Fat tears were running down his round cheeks and it tugged on Wooyoung’s heartstrings, despite his initial determination to keep his distance.

“I shouldn’t have taken my bullshit out on you... you didn’t deserve that. And I promise, I’ll work on myself, just... don’t leave me, please...”

Wooyoung stood there for a moment, waiting for Hongjoong to say more, but he didn’t. He timidly stepped closer, putting his hands on Hongjoong’s arms, trembling with the sobs he was trying to withhold. Wooyoung wrapped him into a hug, finally giving in to his initial urge.

Hongjoong’s breath hitched in surprise, but it was only a moment later that his hands tangled into the back of Wooyoung’s shirt as he hugged him back.

“I can’t say I’ll just forgive and forget... but I can work on it... and I love you too...”

Hongjoong pulled back to look at him. “You do? Why?”

Wooyoung laughed at the question and pulled him back in, relishing in the feeling of having Hongjoong in his arms like this. He was going to savor it for as long as he could.

“Believe it or not, Joongie... you’re quite lovable. Issues and everything.”

Hongjoong chuckled wetly, his grip around Wooyoung tightening momentarily.

“Can I kiss you?” he mumbled into Wooyoung’s shirt.

Wooyoung hesitated for just a moment. He wasn’t sure where exactly he stood with Hongjoong right now, but he was sure it was okay to indulge himself just a little bit. His inner voice stayed silent, which Wooyoung decided to take as a go.

“You can...”

Hongjoong pulled back just enough for them to be able to bring their lips together. Wooyoung’s heartbeat picked up at finally being able to do this again, after being deprived of those lips for so long. Their kiss tasted salty, thanks to Hongjoong’s tears, but Wooyoung didn’t care.

“I see you two made up.”

They jumped apart at the sound of Wooyoung’s dormmate’s voice.

“Can you knock, Jesus Christ?!” Wooyoung complained. Hongjoong buried his face in the crook of his neck in embarrassment, though, so he couldn’t truly be angry at his dormmate.

“Do you want me to knock coming out of my room?” he replied, chuckling in amusement. “Either way, just tell me if you’re going to bang, so I can get my earplugs out.”

Wooyoung glared at him. “We’re not. But if we were, it would serve you right if it was right here on this couch!”

His dormmate didn’t even have the decency to look embarrassed at the obvious callout as he trotted on to the kitchen. Wooyoung rolled his eyes at him before he refocused on Hongjoong who seemed to be quite content in his embrace. It was a rare sight, but Wooyoung would be lying if he said he was opposed to this. He loved affection of any kind. And getting it from Hongjoong? He could get used to that.

“So... how is this gonna go?” he asked, growing slightly more serious again.

“I don’t know...” Hongjoong answered, fidgeting a little, with his arms still around Wooyoung, “like I said, I’m going to work on my issues and everything. But in the meantime... do you maybe want to, like...”

Wooyoung raised his eyebrow, grinning. “Kim Hongjoong! Are you asking me out?”

“Yes, don’t make me say it, please,” Hongjoong whined, hiding his face again. Wooyoung laughed and wrapped his arms around his shoulders.

“I’m not going to make you say it. And I’d love to out with you. I think we had it kinda twisted from the start...” he pointed out.

He didn’t know how this would turn out, and maybe he would end up regretting opening up his heart, after Hongjoong had treated him like he had. But, being the hopeless romantic he undeniable was, he was willing to be optimistic one more time.

***

“Correct me if I’m wrong, but I don’t think this is how first dates are supposed to go,” Hongjoong pointed out a few weeks later, as he grabbed the base of Wooyoung’s cock and sank down on it with a pleased sigh. Wooyoung’s hands held a steady grip on his hips, leaning back in the car seat.

“Well, you didn’t have to show up in a skirt after us not fucking for weeks,” Wooyoung pointed out, sounding slightly out of breath. Hongjoong grinned deviously as he began to lift himself off Wooyoung’s cock only to slam back down. They groaned in unison as the car windows fogged up around them.

They hadn’t even made it to the restaurant. Upon seeing Hongjoong in that skirt, Wooyoung’s hands and eyes had continuously trailed over to Hongjoong’s exposed thighs until he couldn’t take it anymore and pulled over the car.

They had wanted to take it slow, initially, but he was just too weak for Hongjoong’s thighs. Besides, they had let some time pass before finally going on that date, spending it by talking things out properly.

Wooyoung thought it was justified for them to fuck it out properly, too.

“Fuck, Joongie, you’re so fucking tight,” he panted, helping Hongjoong move his hips. “Feel so good around me...”

Hongjoong moaned, resting one hand against the fogged up window as he used the other to steady himself on Wooyoung’s shoulder as he sped up his movements. The white pleated skirt obscured most of Wooyoung’s view, but the feeling of Hongjoong clenching around his cock was almost enough to make Wooyoung cum on the spot anyway.

“Fuck, so good... I missed you so much,” Hongjoong whined, mouth falling open when Wooyoung’s cock hit his prostate dead on. “Woo, please... I need more...”

Wooyoung complied and held him up, planted his feet firmly on the ground as he started to frantically thrust up into Hongjoong’s tight hole. Hongjoong’s head fell forward onto Wooyoung’s shoulder, his hand slipping from the window and clawing into his jacket instead.

“Close...” Hongjoong whined desperately. “Please, don’t stop, I’m so close...”

Wooyoung sunk his teeth into Hongjoong’s neck, making him cry out. He had finally allowed Wooyoung to mark him above the collar bone too, and he would be damned if he didn’t make use of that permission every chance he got. He let his tongue trace over the bite mark, before repeating the action.

Fuck, Woo...” Hongjoong cried out, squirming in Wooyoung’s iron-like grip. “I’m–”

Hongjoong couldn’t finish the warning as his muscles contracted around Wooyoung’s cock, and he let out a breathless moan as he came, effectively soiling his pretty skirt. Wooyoung sped up his thrusts, his strength faltering as well, from the slightly inconvenient position they were in, but it only took Hongjoong clenching around him a few more times for him to cum into the condom with Hongjoong’s name on his lips.

“I...” Hongjoong panted. “I’m afraid, I’ve ruined my skirt...”

Wooyoung chuckled and cupped Hongjoong’s ass cheeks, lovingly nuzzling his neck as he squeezed, making Hongjoong whimper.

“Don’t worry, I’ll get you another one... I’ll get you as many as you like, if it means I get to fuck you in all of them...”

Hongjoong let out a pleased hum at the thought.

“Should we just order pizza and hang out at my place?” he suggested when they were starting to come down from their highs. “Seeing as I’m no longer presentable for a restaurant?”

Wooyoung smirked up at him, taking in his ruined form, flushed cheeks, rumpled shirt, messy hair, soiled skirt. He was so beautiful like this.

“Sounds good,” he agreed. He’d much rather have Hongjoong all to himself anyway.

“How about a movie, too?” Hongjoong suggested with a little smile. Wooyoung’s heart swelled in his chest at the prospect of cuddling with Hongjoong in front of the TV while they ate pizza, preferably wearing some more comfortable clothes than the ones they were wearing right now.

“You’d have to get off my dick for that, first, though, baby...” Wooyoung pointed out cheekily.

Hongjoong delivered a half-hearted slap to his chest for his crudeness but slowly pulled off Wooyoung’s cock, wincing. He let himself fall back into the passenger’s seat, watching as Wooyoung zipped up his pants again and fixed his hair in the rearview mirror before starting the car and turning it around to take them to Hongjoong’s place.

So far, their first official date was going pretty well.

Notes:

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edit: jsyk i'm not happy with the happy ending bc these two were toxic as hell but alas, the sequel got stuck in the sand...