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“Hey, watch it!”
You snapped out of your daze just long enough to squeak out an apology. Your pace quickens, pulling your robes closer to your body as you make the trek to the Great Hall. Your mind has been in a constant fog since the start of December, and the topic that has you so preoccupied, still very much prevalent in your brain.
As you walk through the entrance for dinner, the chatter of students and staff alike become more apparent as you take a seat at your house table. You were quick to pile up some food onto your dish, but as you went to take your first taste, your attention was quickly shifted to the end of the Slytherin table where a certain raven-haired boy sat. His face was buried inside a textbook, but you’d recognise that head of hair anywhere.
Suddenly, thoughts that captured you before came back at full force, and your own dinner was forgotten. For weeks now, you have been trying to figure out a way to approach one Severus Snape to tell him how you felt about him. Heck, you’d settle for getting him to talk to you anywhere outside of class. Most of the interactions between the two of you have occurred in herbology where you and he have been paired as partners during the start of the school year. At first, he had barely spoken a word to you, and it was made clear that he would much rather be working alone than with you. But after weeks of radio silence, he indulged you in your drivel and replied with short one-worded responses. It meant everything to you.
Now, it was the end of the first week of January, and you have since developed feelings for the intelligent and reserved boy. You just didn’t know how in the bloody hell you were going to approach him outside of the Hogwarts’ greenhouses.
Soon enough, the noise of dinner being dismissed brought you out of your daydreaming. You joined the crowd of students as they all shuffled out to their respective common rooms. You had only made it a few metres away from the door before a familiar flash of black and green rushes past your peripheral. You opened your mouth as to yell for him, but your own body stopped itself short. What were you even going to say to him if he gave you the time of day?
It seems that you weren’t the only one who noticed Severus zoom by because the second he disappeared around the corner, two Slytherins beside you began a hushed whisper.
“There goes Snape again. Do you think that bloke has a single friend?”
“Not that I know of. Heard Lucius say that it’s his birthday tomorrow. Wonder if…”
The rest of their conversation was lost on you. It was his birthday tomorrow?!
...
That’s it!
A lightbulb went off in your head as your brain whirled from one idea to the next. The smile on your face grew as you began the walk again to your dorm room.
You had lots to do if you were going to do this right.
It was Friday afternoon and you were about to head to the greenhouses for your final class of the day. Coincidently, this was your last class you had with Severus before his birthday tomorrow. You had spent the previous night till the crack of dawn writing out ideas and planning everything to a T. Your body and mind were undeniably exhausted, but if everything went according to plan, Severus would have a great birthday… at least you hoped.
First things first, you had to somehow convince Severus to meet with you tomorrow, which was easier said than done. Because you had never spoken to him outside of the glass walls of the herbology classroom, having him trust you enough to meet could be proven difficult.
As you entered the classroom, Professor Sprout greeted you, which you returned before making your way to the back where you and Severus usually sat for the lesson. He was already there with his textbook cracked open and the view made you smile. Strands of his hair always fell in front of his face, and your hand always twitched with the desire to tuck them back. You wondered if his hair felt as soft as it looked. He looked up when he heard you sit down beside him on the wooden stool.
“Hello, Severus!”
Instead of a verbal response, he looked your way and nodded his head to acknowledge your presence. I’ll take it.
Today was a more relaxed day of class. The infirmary was in need of more Skele-Gro potion. Therefore, all the students were just to spend lesson time repotting Chinese Chomping Cabbage. Despite the worrisome name, the plant only consumes food that you provide it. You and Severus had quickly devised a plan to complete the work at a faster pace. While you plucked out the young plant and fed it a carrot to calm it down, Severus would be digging holes into the fresh soil. That way, once the plant was fed, he could easily plop and secure it down into the bigger terracotta planters. By the time you and Severus had managed to repot all the sprouts into their new pots, the rest of the students were only halfway through their pile. The professor made her rounds and was quick to comment on the efficiency of your and Severus’ work, and rewarded 10 points to your respective houses.
You smiled at Sev feeling quite accomplished, and your heart went aflutter when he gave you a small but very adorable grin in return. With the rest of the class time being free to do what you pleased, you realised that this would probably be the best time to ask him your question.
“Hey. Sev?”
“Hmm?” he hummed as his gaze followed the words in his book.
“Are you doing anything tomorrow evening?”
The question seemed to hold his full attention as he snapped his head your way. His eyes narrowed, and you knew instantly that he was sceptical. Dang, I knew this wasn’t going to be easy.
“Why?”
You took a deep breath, but your eyes failed to maintain eye contact with him. “I needed to study for my astronomy exam and was wondering if you wanted to meet up tomorrow night to do so together.” Your hands picked at each other as you spoke.
“But I don’t take astronomy?” You couldn’t see his face, but you could definitely hear the apprehension in his voice.
“I know. I just like the company when I study. However, I prefer someone who would study silently beside me rather than chatter.” You garnered enough courage to look his way, and thankfully, he seemed less wary of your intentions. “I figured since you’d probably be reading or studying while everyone was down at Hogsmeade, we could– well, we could keep each other’s company.”
“Fine.”
He returned to his book, but as he read the following paragraph on the uses of asphodel, he couldn’t help the soft smile that graced his face as he saw your body light up with excitement. You were practically giddy with anticipation with the possibilities come tomorrow.
The next morning you had woken up earlier than anyone in your dorm room. It was finally Saturday which meant that no student would be up earlier than they had to. You, however, had to get a head start with preparations. Before you and Severus split ways yesterday, he had agreed to meet you at the astronomy tower at 5. All the students would be at dinner or in Hogsmeade this weekend which ensured the likelihood of anyone interrupting you two would be close to zero.
You went through your normal routine of brushing your teeth and brushing your hair, but since you could dress more casually on the days no classes were in session, you traded in your uniform for a pair of dark blue jeans and a pale blue turtleneck. On most days, your face was bare of any makeup, but today was a special day, and heck, you wanted to feel pretty for your crush. With a swipe of rosy eyeshadow onto both your lids, you used some eyeliner to accentuate your eyes before applying a layer of mascara on the lashes. Happy with your handiwork, you grabbed the tube of clear lip-gloss that was sitting on your vanity and gave your lips a thin coat before pocketing it, knowing you’d need to apply more as it comes off throughout the day.
As you were leaving your common room, you saw the clock that hung above the fireplace read 8:00 AM. Perfect.
The Great Hall was practically empty with only a handful of people at each table. You took a seat at the end of the long table and prepared a bowl of porridge with your favourite toppings. Pulling out a small folded piece of paper from your back pocket, you opened it back up till the words you hastily scribbled were visible. You held on to it with one hand as the other fed you your breakfast. Written in your script at the very top centre of the page was ‘Operation Tell Snape How You Feel and Not Embarrass Yourself'. The title could use some work, but it was the best you could come up with at one in the morning.
Spooning another bite of porridge into your mouth, you skimmed over the list one more time to make sure you had everything you needed to do on there.
1. Make to-do list
Check.
2. Come up with a better name
3. Wake up early, get dressed, eat breakfast
Skipping that for now and check.
4. Buy birthday gift at Hogsmeade
5. Go to the kitchens to cook dinner and bake a cake
6. Set up the astronomy tower
7. Tell Severus how you feel
8. Celebrate OR run away and change your name
Tonight could go either way, so it was better to cover all your bases with the last one.
Shoving the last spoonful, you refolded the paper and went to grab your coat. There were loads to get done before the clock hit five and you were determined to make this birthday the best one Severus would have yet.
Finding a gift that Severus would like turned out to be a lot harder than expected, which in turn, took more of your time than desired. You rushed back to the castle when you realised the time after making your purchase. Out of breath and panting, you shuffled down the staircase that led to the kitchens. Stepping through the door, the sight of house-elves all around greeted you with their preparations for dinner. A house-elf came up to you and inquired what you wanted. At the mention of wanting to cook and bake for yourself, you swore that the little elf was going to have an aneurysm, but as you pleaded, she gave in with a humph. With your hand in their's, she led you to a small unoccupied section of the kitchen and proceeded to gather all the ingredients on the recipes you had. When you were finally left alone, you pushed up your sleeves and got to work.
As you threw in the rack of lamb into the oven and the timer, you set to place the gift in a box and wrapped it snug with a dark green velvet ribbon. Putting it off to the side, you got started with the dessert. Since you didn’t know what Severus liked, you’d figure a dark chocolate cake was a safe bet. The perfect in-between of rich and subtly sweet. Just as you poured the batter into the tins, the timer for the oven went off. Excellent timing.
You switched out the tray and replaced its spot in the oven with the cake. You let the meat rest as you prepared the potato and asparagus sides. Once everything was prepared, you plated it all onto two separate dishes and casted a stasis charm over the food to ensure that the meal would still be piping hot when served later.
Placing the dishes underneath a cloche, you got to work on the cake that you’d just pulled from the oven. Checking the time on the oven, you saw that you only had an hour and a half left before Severus was to show up. Knowing him too, you know that he’ll show up right on time, if not earlier. You grabbed your wand and muttered a cooling spell over the moulds allowing you to take them out and frost them right away. Assembling everything took no time at all and soon you had a beautiful, albeit slightly crooked, 4-layer chocolate ganache cake. Half tempted to steal a quick taste, you refrained yourself and grabbed the white icing instead and piped on a ‘Happy Birthday Severus’ in your best print. The word ‘birthday’ was slightly squished, but you thought it looked endearing.
Making sure you absolutely had everything, you shrunk it all and placed it on a small tray for easier handling.
Your walk to the astronomy tower proved unproblematic. Laying the tray down onto a desk that you will be using tonight as a table, you got to work decorating the room to how it was envisioned in your mind.
With a groan, you slumped back into a chair and surveyed the classroom. You managed to borrow your friend’s fairy lights, and with a few duplicating spells, the ceiling and walls of the classroom glittered with a gentle glow creating a warm ambience around the table. The latter of which was now sitting by the railing of the tower. You were thankful the space had a barrier spell of sorts to keep the frigid air out or this dinner would have been spent shivers.
The table itself was a shorter one, requiring you and Severus to sit on the floor to eat, but you didn’t mind one bit. You thought it made for a more intimate atmosphere. To ensure sitting on the floor wouldn’t get too uncomfortable, you moved some of the cushions from the other side of the room over. You grabbed the prepared plates and placed them at each end of the table before setting up the silverware and glasses. The cake and present were hidden off in the corner behind some books.
At exactly 4:45 PM, you heard the door to the tower open and the echo of footsteps as someone climbed up the stairs. You smirked to yourself, being able to predict that he was going to be early. I bet myself an extra slice of cake that his wand will be drawn too.
Like thinking of the name summoned him, the head of Severus Snape peeks over the railing to investigate his surroundings. You stand up a little straighter as he continues to look around the room. Noticing the wand in his hand, you pat yourself on the back and promise your stomach that extra slice. When he sees that it’s only you up here, he tucks away his wand and takes in the changes that you’ve made.
He’s rendered speechless with blown pupils, not knowing what to say or think.
“Happy birthday Severus!”
He turned his gaze away from the lights on the ceiling to you, and while his heart wanted him to smile, his mind was plaguing him with doubt.
“How did you know it was my birthday?”
Okay. Was not expecting that. “Oh, um… I overheard a few students from your house saying that today was going to be your birthday.”
“What– what is all this?” It was as if his mind couldn’t focus, and as the war between his head and his heart raged on, he was truly lost for words.
You rubbed the back of your neck and chewed on your bottom lip, a nervous habit you acquired over the years. “Truthfully, I’ve been wanting to spend some time with you outside of class, but I didn’t know how to approach you. Your birthday sort of gave me an opening and a push to do so because I really do want to celebrate today!”
He stood silently, no longer questioning the room or your intentions, but instead, he was examining you. You felt your face flush with every passing minute that nothing was said.
It took a while, but he moved forward, away from the exit to stand across from you.
“Why?”
Your head tilted to the side as you furrowed your brows. “What do you mean why? I told you that I wanted to– .”
Shaking his head, “No, I understand that. What I mean is… why me?”
Instantly, the questioning look you had on disappeared and was substituted by a frown. The quick change in mood made Severus think that he had offended you and went to open his mouth and apologise, but before he could, your eyes focused in on him. You extended your finger out in a motion that reminded him very much like the reprimands he got whenever he was in trouble.
“What do you mean why you? Why not you? In case you haven’t realised from all the times I’ve tried to engage in conversations with you in class, I like you, Severus Snape.” You ended your sentence with a little stomp of your foot for emphasis, and if you hadn’t just stunned him, he would have chuckled at how adorable it was.
A flush of pink coloured the apple of his cheeks as the speed of his heart racing could rival the Hogwarts Express. If he thought he didn’t know what to say before, he certainly didn’t now. This beautiful person likes me? Me?! Severus Snape, the notoriously cold-hearted git who, by all means, was severely lacking in the looks department. Who could like me? I barely like me. Seriously, what–
“Hey! Stop that!”
His head snapped back to you, not even noticing that he had let his concentration wander away. “Stop what?”
“That!”, you huffed dropping yourself onto one of the cushions you laid out earlier. “I know you’re trying to convince yourself of all the reasons as to why I couldn’t like you. I can spend the whole night telling you why I do, but frankly, I’m starving. I spent all afternoon cooking us dinner, so if it’s alright with you, can we eat before I break down your brigade of self-deprecation and criticism?”
The loud scoff followed by his deep chuckle startled you, but it was the most glorious sound you’ve ever heard.
“I forget how blunt you can be.” He settled himself in the other seat you had laid out, deciding to sit with his legs crossed. “Are you a legilimens? How did you know what I was thinking?”
“No. Just perceptive. I’d probably have the same train of thought if you were to say you liked me and put me in the same situation.” You pulled yourself closer to the edge of the table, removing the covers protecting the supper and set them aside. “Sorry, too. My friends tell me that I could use some work on my delivery.”
You grabbed your wand that you’d set to the side, and with a simple wave, removed the charm you had cast over the meal. Instantly the steam that was held in place started to rise again, filling the air with savoury scents of the meal you prepared. The smell immediately made you salivate. From the look on Severus’ face, he seemed to be pleased too.
Fully ready to dig in, you picked up your fork and knife. With each in their respective hand, you cut off a chunk of the lamb, but before you could place it into your mouth, he starts to talk again.
“Don’t be. I like it.”
On cue, your stomach made a noise eerily similar to a lion’s growl. You were sure you couldn’t embarrass yourself any further at this point. You thank him, softly letting your face redden at the compliment. Taking him grabbing his fork as a sign to start eating, you pop yours between your open lips. You watch Severus bring his spare hand up to the back of his neck, rubbing it shyly. You swallowed your mouthful and was about to question why he wasn't eating. Hearing you gulp, he forces his gaze to make contact with yours.
In a hushed whisper that you would not be able to hear if it wasn’t for the calm silence, “And for the record. I like you too.”
A sudden flurry of butterflies rushed your lower body at his confession. You felt the simultaneous desire to throw up and jump for joy. It is as if everything that was wrong in the universe was suddenly right. As if nothing could ever go wrong in your life ever again. It felt as if… the love you had wished to feel was now possible.
He could see the rush of emotions that flooded you, and even he could not mistake it for anything other than happiness. The nerves that once clouded him were no longer present and a smile took over seeing how you were practically vibrating from all the joy. And he wasn’t wrong. You wanted to lean over the railing and profess to the world that the boy you had fallen hard for returned your affections.
The next minute played out in slow motion before Severus. In the heat of the moment, you acted on autopilot, which found you in your current position. Your body was thrown across the expanse of his, hands threaded into inky strands as you held his face, and the oh so unmistakable soft feeling of your warm lips pressed against his.
The only warning of your actions before they happened was the clatter of your utensils against the white porcelain. He was shocked to say the least, but before you could even process your own actions, his fingers found their home across the expanse of your back. The soft material of your sweater on his bare skin as he pressed you closer deepening the kiss.
He felt the curl of your lip before he saw it and found himself mirroring your grin. Pulling away for air, the two of you were equally captivated by what you saw. Skin flushed and hair slightly tousled—the clothes which donned yours and his body, dishevelled. Altogether, a view which sent your heart into overtime and Severus’ to skip a beat.
The hands which radiated heat against your back shifted. Expecting him to move them away, you were in awe when instead when one of them reached up to tuck a lock of hair back behind your ear before finding themselves nestled on your waist, keeping you exactly where he wanted you. Close to him.
Severus was first to break the silence. “Don’t take this as complaining because I am undoubtedly not, but what was that for?”
You let out a sheepish smile as you struggled to formulate your words. “I don’t know truthfully. I just felt so... happy that I had the overwhelming desire to kiss you.”
Chuckling as he leans his forehead against yours, “You have no idea how hard it was for me to think of anything other than what it would be like to kiss you… to hold you.”
“In full disclosure, I don’t think I will be able to think about anything else now that I know what it is like to do those things.”
He offers you a few more kisses which you eagerly accept. “We should probably return to eating before the food your made gets too cold. It looks wonderful and I would be dismayed if it goes to waste.”
“You’re right.” You sigh as you bury your head into his chest, not ready to part just yet. “It’s an incredible feat to get me to completely forget about food when I’m properly starved so you should be impressed.”
He snorts at your comment. “The faster we eat, the faster we can return to this position then.”
“There’s still cake and presents too.”
Propping you up to have you looking at him again, he wound his arms around your torso. “The best present I could ever get is right here in front of me.”
“Yeah?” You smiled cheekily. “I take it I’ve made your birthday enjoyable enough then?”
“Y/N,” stealing another kiss from you.
“This shall be a birthday I’ll always remember.”