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Homestuck Rarepair Swap 2015
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Published:
2015-03-23
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3,504
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1/1
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7
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136
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Tasteful Conversation

Summary:

Ok, so it's starting to look like hiding on an island forever might not be the healthiest way to deal with their problems, but it was worth a shot.

Notes:

Happy rarepair swap!

I tried to catch the dynamic you described, hope you like it =)

Work Text:

Karkat: WELL I GUESS IT'S SETTLED.
Karkat: WE SHOVED OUR HEADS ALL THE WAY UP OUR OWN ASSES AND STRAIGHT THROUGH INTO HELL.
Karkat: WE'RE IN HELL EVERYONE, GOOD JOB.
Jade: oh lord
Karkat: HE CAN'T HEAR YOU DOWN HERE, JADE. NOT IN HELL.
Jade: you know I'm really getting sick of you calling my island hell!
Jade: I like it here!
Karkat: THE DAVES CALL YOUR ISLAND HELL ALL THE TIME AND YOU DON'T GET PISSY WITH THEM.
Davesprite: correction we call it hellmurder island and its hilarious
Jade: loving parody!
Davesprite: well hey now thats moving pretty quick
Davesprite: more like affectionate parody
Davesprite: subtle flirtation parody
Davesprite: yknow like smiles across the room and fluttering eyelashes
Jade: are you fluttering your eyelashes at my island, davesprite?
Davesprite: yes maam fluttering the fuck right out of them
Jade: well, now! im not sure I approve of this relationship
Karkat: COULD WE PLEASE GET BACK TO HOW MUCH I HATE IT HERE?
Davesprite: no
Davesprite: cmon mrs hellmurder
Davesprite: how do i convince you im the right orange tinted bird man for your island
Davesprite: im not sure if youve noticed but i totally have legs now
Jade: thats true, you do have legs...
Davesprite: right its like we were made for each other
Jade: i certainly cant argue with that logic!
Karkat: WHAT IF I JUST STARTED WALKING?
Karkat: RIGHT INTO THE OCEAN.
Karkat: WOULD I JUST WAKE UP IN BACK IN MY BED, TRAPPED HERE FOR ALL ETERNITY BY BULLSHIT MAGIC?
Jade: karkat we are constantly zapping around with space powers
Jade: thats how you got here!
Jade: you can leave literally any time you want
Davesprite: dont say literally jade dont give him that kind of power
Jade: any time when im not busy, or sleeping or something
Karkat: AND WHERE THE FUCK WOULD I GO, JADE?
Karkat: THIS HORRIBLE PASTICHE OF A PLANET ISN'T EXACTLY CLAMORING FOR PEOPLE WITH MY PARTICULAR SKILLS.
Karkat: NAMELY, ALMOST BEING A THRESHICUTIONER.
Karkat: ALMOST BEING A GOD.
Karkat: AND SEEING WHEN I'M NOT WANTED.
Davesprite: you are such a douche
Karkat: WELL LOOK AT THAT, A FOURTH SKILL.
Karkat: THINGS ARE REALLY LOOKING UP FOR ME NOW.
Jade: quit acting like the world is personally fucking you over karkat!
Jade: youre not the only one whos had to adjust, and youd be a lot further along with it if youd quit sulking!
Davesprite: or hey maybe just stop saying the same shit every time we sit down for dinner that would work too
Karkat: GOODNESS GRACIOUS, DAVESPRITE'S TAKEN TIME OFF BETWEEN NOT TALKING TO HIS FRIENDS AND REFUSING TO PURSUE HIS STILL COMPLETELY VIABLE CAREER PREFERENCES TO FEEL SUPERIOR TO ME.
Karkat: THAT'S DEFINITELY SURPRISING AND UNPRECEDENTED.
Karkat: WHAT A REVOLTINGLY IDEAL ROLE MODEL YOU ARE.
Davesprite: fuck you man at least I have a reason for backing off
Karkat: A REASON HE SAYS!
Karkat: LET'S BREAK DOWN THIS GLORIOUS JUSTIFICATION YOU KEEP SHITTING AT US, WHY DON'T WE?
Davesprite: werent you going to walk into the ocean or something that sounded cool
Karkat: ENLIGHTENED BOWEL SPLATTER, PART ONE.
Karkat: YOU LOOK LIKE A FREAK.
Karkat: NOW HERE I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT I MAY NOT BE THE BEST JUDGE OF WHAT WOULD OR WOULD NOT CONSTITUTE A FREAKISH APPEARANCE TO A HUMAN, SINCE I PERSONALLY AM VIOLENTLY NAUSEATED BY THE LOT OF YOU.
Jade: thats not the way John tells it...
Davesprite: wait what
Karkat: IS THAT WHAT HELPING LOOKS LIKE, JADE?
Jade: probably not =D
Karkat: I DIDN'T THINK SO.
Karkat: NOW-
Davesprite: pass the potatoes
Karkat: SURE. AS I WAS-
Jade: could i have some of the peas?
Karkat: YOU GREW THE DAMN THINGS I THINK YOU CAN PROBABLY EAT THEM, YEAH.
Jade: thanks!
Karkat: YOU'RE WELCOME.
Karkat: NOW BACK TO HOW DAVESPRITE IS A FILTH BLOATED HYPOCRITE.
Davesprite: hooray
Karkat: SHUSH.
Karkat: SO ORANGE IS NOT A TYPICAL COLOR FOR HUMANS.
Karkat: YOU KNOW WHAT'S NOT A TYPICAL COLOR FOR TROLLS?
Karkat: BRIGHT FUCKING RED.
Karkat: YOUR WINGS ARE GONE, YOUR LEGS ARE BACK, AND HOWEVER MANY FEATHERS YOU HAVE BURSTING FROM YOUR TORSO YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BEAT JADE'S LUSUS WHITE DOG EARS.
Davesprite: she can wear a hat
Karkat: YOU CAN WEAR A SHIRT.
Davesprite: dude no that fucking itches
Jade: hats kind of hurt!
Karkat: AND YET SHE SUCKS IT UP LONG ENOUGH TO TRAIPSE THROUGH THE CONVOLUTED MIRE OF ALTERNIEARTH SOCIETY WITH HER FRIENDS, INSTEAD OF RAPPING SADLY THROUGH THE HIVE ALL DAY.
Davesprite: kay so jades great how does this disqualify you from pain in the ass of the year
Karkat: IT DOESN'T.
Karkat: MY WHOLE GODDAMN POINT IS THAT ALL THREE OF US ARE DEFORMED, AND YOU CAN EITHER OWN IT AND ACTUALLY LIVE YOUR LIFE, OR YOU CAN ADMIT THAT YOU'D RATHER SLITHER THROUGH THIS MISERY TRENCH WITH ME AND QUIT PRETENDING YOUR MAUDLIN APATHY IS ANY BETTER ADJUSTED THAN MY YELLING AT THE DINNER TABLE.
Davesprite: wait let me get this straight
Davesprite: you dont care if im wallowing
Davesprite: you just dont want me to think im better than you while i do it
Davesprite: well jesus christ thanks for all that friendship pal
Karkat: ACTUALLY, I SORT OF FUCKING DO MIND.
Karkat: IF YOU'D BEEN PAYING THE SLIGHTEST BIT OF ATTENTION INSTEAD OF TRYING TO MOROSELY STARE YOUR FOOD INTO PITYING YOU ENOUGH TO PRECHEW ITSELF, YOU'D HAVE NOTICED THAT GREAT SYSTEMATIC DECONSTRUCTION OF HALF YOUR MELODRAMA THAT I DID LITERALLY SECONDS AGO.
Davesprite: golly gee buddy systematic deconstruction i sure wish i HAD caught some of that
Davesprite: yknow instead of all that shit where you acted like coming from the isle of misfit toys is so touching itll keep little billys heart from breaking when instead of getting that awesome kung fu grip dave he asked for santa chucks a goddamn shirtless oompa loompa at his head
Karkat: THANK YOU DAVESPRITE.
Karkat: THAT THOROUGHLY UNCALLED FOR BLOCK OF HUMAN POP CULTURE IS A PERFECT SEGUE INTO THE SECOND HALF OF YOUR MELODRAMA.
Karkat: RECTAL FROTH, PART TWO.
Jade: ew
Karkat: I AGREE, THESE DELUSIONS ARE VISCERALLY REPULSIVE.
Davesprite: thats not what she meant and you know it
Davesprite: like we are literally eating right now dude seriously
Jade: i mean i do think youre being really dumb, but less graphic terms would be nice
Davesprite: are you kidding me
Davesprite: how exactly am i being dumb jade we talked about this it was kind of a big deal
Karkat: TAKE IT AWAY, JADE.
Jade: karkat dont be smug!
Davesprite: yeah karkat
Jade: really?
Davesprite: sorry
Karkat: NO YOU'RE NOT.
Davesprite: yeah i know
Jade: would you both shut up??
Jade: youre being dumb because you keep acting like no one wants you around!
Davesprite: well i mean i know you guys like me okay but come on
Davesprite: i was invited here on the good graces fostered by normal dave and we all know it
Jade: oh my god! im sorry karkat, you were right to call this rectal froth
Karkat: YEP, I KNOW MELODRAMA WHEN I SEE IT.
Davesprite: pat your self on the back a little harder
Davesprite: i wanna see what you cough up
Jade: SHUT THE FUCK UP!
Davesprite: jesus christ alright
Karkat: SORRY JADE.
Jade: thank you
Jade: now, youre not here because we like the other dave!
Jade: i mean, i barely even know the other dave!
Jade: we talked online a bunch, then he lived on a meteor for three years and then we made a new universe together and now he lives in texas
Davesprite: im not saying anything
Davesprite: even though a really sarcastic oh is that all is called for im not saying it
Jade: good
Jade: look...we still chat, and hell always be my friend, but you know how busy things were at the end of the game
Jade: we barely got a chance to talk, and we only met in person for like a day before that, and in between those you and John and I spent three years on the ship together
Jade: things were kinda off for a while when we broke up, but we got through that, and i mean...
Jade: youre the real dave to me, ok?
Jade: if theres a weird secondary dave its meteor dave
Jade: youre here because youre my friend, and I like hanging out with you
Davesprite: oh
Karkat: FUCKING STRAIGHT, OH.
Karkat: AND WE'RE NOT DONE YET.
Karkat: JOHN HAS ACCEPTED THE NOTION OF TWO DISTINCT DAVES WITH THE PLACIDITY OF A STROKE VICTIM.
Karkat: RIGHT, JADE?
Jade: yep! it took some time, but hes got it now
Karkat: YOUR HORRIBLE TEENAGE PARADOX BRO IS, FROM WHAT I GATHER, QUITE LITERALLY ALL ABOUT ALTERNATE REALIZATIONS OF SELF.
Karkat: APPARENTLY THERE ARE TWO OF HIM, SOMEHOW?
Davesprite: yeah lil hals been living it up from what i hear
Davesprite: he got a sorta normal body too
Karkat: WELL THERE YOU FUCKING GO.
Karkat: WE'LL MAKE HIM AN HONORARY MEMBER OF OUR ISLE OF WHATEVER THE GODAWFUL CRAP YOU SAID.
Karkat: HE CAN BE YOUR SPONSOR WHILE YOU STRUGGLE WITH THIS TRAGIC DEPENDENCY ON YOUR OWN WOE.
Davesprite: nah word is hes been woe-ing it up himself
Karkat: OK, THEN BAND TOGETHER WITH THE OTHER ONE FOR A HEARTWARMING TALE OF REDEMPTION AND FAMILIAL LOVE, I REALLY DO NOT GIVE A SHIT.
Karkat: THE POINT IS WHATEVER ISSUES ARE GOING ON THERE, I THINK IT'S A SAFE BET NOT BEING THE ONLY YOU AROUND IS GOING TO FEEL PRETTY PAR FOR THE COURSE TO THOSE GUYS.
Jade: im sure jane would like you if we can convince her youre not a hoax
Jade: and my grandpas kind of a doofus, but hell be fine so long as he doesnt think youre a robot duplicate!
Davesprite: ok there are stories there and i demand to hear them once this is wrapped up.
Karkat: AGREED.
Karkat: I DON'T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ROSE'S PARADOX MOTHER BUT SHE KEPT LAUGHING AND HUGGING ME WHEN I SCREAMED AT HER SO I GUESS THAT'S AVAILABLE.
Davesprite: yeah roxy seems cool
Karkat: I WOULD SOONER RIP OFF MY OWN ARM AND SWALLOW IT WHOLE THAN MEET HER AGAIN.
Davesprite: im gonna start a book club and get her to visit every week
Karkat: THAT'S THE SPIRIT, JACKASS.
Karkat: AND THIS IS EXACTLY THE SORT OF SHIT YOUR SISTER WOULD GET A KICK OUT OF.
Davesprite: okay but i didnt even know she was my sister till i got here like
Davesprite: she was my friend
Davesprite: but shes his sister
Davesprite: i dont have that with her
Karkat: DO YOU WANT TO?
Davesprite: shes ok i guess
Karkat: THEN IT SURE LOOKS LIKE THE ONLY REAL WAY TO KNOW IF ROSE THE SEER CAN COMPREHEND THE NOTION OF A DIVERGENT TIMELINE IS TO TALK TO HER, HUH?
Davesprite: seems logical
Davesprite: what about you
Karkat: YEAH DAVESPRITE I THINK I'VE GRASPED THE IDEA.
Davesprite: no i mean like
Davesprite: nevermind great im glad youve got a handle on it
Karkat: OH NO.
Karkat: I'M NOT LEAVING YOU ANY PITY HOLES TO SQUIRM INTO WHEN I'M NOT LOOKING.
Karkat: WHAT ABOUT ME?
Davesprite: its nothing dude whatever
Davesprite: thanks for the pep talk this was rousing as fuck
Davesprite: in fact why dont i go get an official start.
Davesprite: ill see you later i have messages to send.
Karkat: SIT DOWN DAVESPRITE.
Davesprite: no i really should go take advantage of all this self esteem
Davesprite: i can probably still catch rose tonight
Davesprite: you know how much she loves pep
Karkat: WHAT ABOUT ME?
Davesprite: who knows probably just wondering where you stood
Karkat: RIGHT ABOUT NOW I'D SAY ON THE BORDER BETWEEN CONCERN FOR YOU AND CONCERN FOR MY OWN ASS BEING DUMB ENOUGH TO TAKE ON THE SADNESS FANTASY OF SOMEONE WHO CAN APPARENTLY GET THROUGH A WHOLE CONVERSATION ABOUT HOW THEY DESERVE BETTER THAN FORLORN EXILE AND STILL HAVE TO ASK ME WHERE I STAND ON THE MATTER.
Karkat: I CAN ASSURE YOU DAVESPRITE, THIS HAS NOT BEEN AN ELABORATE RUSE.
Karkat: I'M NOT DOING A FAVOR FOR JADE.
Karkat: I REALLY DO WANT YOU TO BE ABLE TO TALK TO YOUR FRIENDS AGAIN.
Davesprite: okay you
Davesprite: okay
Davesprite: i just meant
Karkat: WHAT?
Davesprite: weve gone over who i am to everyone else
Davesprite: who am i to you
Karkat: OH.
Davesprite: yeah
Karkat: WELL.
Davesprite: but you know this whole thing has been
Davesprite: this has been pretty alright
Davesprite: so
Davesprite: thanks karkat
Davesprite: i appreciate it

Karkat: YOU GET IT.
Davesprite: what
Karkat: KNOWING YOU CAN BE SOMETHING.
Karkat: BE MORE.
Karkat: BUT LOOKING AT EVERYONE AROUND YOU AND FEELING LIKE WHATEVER YOU ARE, IT'S NOT ACTUALLY SOMETHING THEY WANT MORE OF.
Karkat: AT LEAST NOT FROM YOU.
Karkat: IT'S FUCKING AWFUL, AND IT MAKES YOU DO STUPID SHIT LIKE HIDE ON AN ISLAND IN THE UNIVERSE YOU HELPED MAKE.
Karkat: YOU GET THAT.
Karkat: WHICH IS.
Karkat: NICE.
Davesprite: huh
Davesprite: yeah
Davesprite: other dave never really got that feeling
Karkat: NOT REALLY.
Davesprite: so if its such bullshit
Davesprite: and you know its bullshit
Davesprite: why dont you come with
Karkat: WAIT, WHERE? WITH WHO?
Davesprite: holy shit you do realize that was four w words in a row right
Karkat: WOULD YOU STOP FLAPPING YOUR OFFENSIVELY STUNTED HUMAN MAW AND FOCUS ON HELPING ME WRAP UP THIS PROFOUNDLY UNCOMFORTABLE PORTION OF OUR CONVERSATION?
Davesprite: flapping
Karkat: DON'T YOU DARE.
Davesprite: fine
Davesprite: come with me
Davesprite: its not like i can get in touch with these people and avoid visiting them they are solicitous as fuck
Davesprite: so when that happens
Davesprite: come with
Karkat: WHY?
Davesprite: what do you mean why
Davesprite: you willingly admit youre living off jades retirement funds like a wheezy basement dwelling man child
Karkat: WELL WHEN YOU SWEET TALK ME LIKE THAT, I CAN'T IMAGINE WHY I WOULDN'T WANT TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOU.
Davesprite: hey your words not mine
Karkat: MY PLANET DIDN'T EVEN HAVE HALF THOSE WORDS.
Davesprite: they totally did but thats not the point
Davesprite: you cant just give me a big speech about reaching out and living my life and then stay here
Davesprite: not doing any of that
Davesprite: if ive gotta leave the nest so do you
Karkat: I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'VE NOTICED DAVESPRITE, BUT MY ISSUES ARE A LOT LESS TROUBLE LIVING MY LIFE AND A LOT MORE MOST OF MY FRIENDS STOPPED LIVING THEIRS.
Karkat: THERE AREN'T THAT MANY PEOPLE LEFT FOR ME TO REACH OUT TO.
Davesprite: ok part one bullshit
Davesprite: youre also moaning about career choices like you just cant get up in the morning without a good tyrant mandated genocide to look forward to
Karkat: I ALREADY DID THE PART THING, DON'T STEAL MY THING YOU LOUCHE SON OF A BITCH.
Davesprite: part two sure we may be running short on original flavor trolls but its not like i was swapping diaries with the ectoparents before i came here
Davesprite: thatll be a brand new thing for us to try not to fuck up before it starts then we can go visit the friends you do have around
Davesprite: part three louche seriously man
Davesprite: youve got my eyelashes fluttering more than ever before
Karkat: LOUCHE IS AN INSULT, IT MEANS YOU'RE AN ASS.
Davesprite: yeah it also means you like it
Davesprite: its ok karkat this is a safe space
Davesprite: you can be honest about liking my ass
Karkat: WHAT THE PAN ADDLED FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.
Karkat: I COULD NOT CARE LESS ABOUT YOUR ASS, DAVESPRITE.
Davesprite: oh
Karkat: WAIT, WHAT?
Davesprite: nothing man just yanking your chain sorry
Karkat: NO, YANKING MY CHAIN INVOLVES A LOT MORE INANE EXTENDED METAPHORS.
Karkat: AND USUALLY MEANS BARELY GETTING THE WORDS EXTENDED METAPHOR OUT BEFORE YOU'VE TURNED THEM INTO ANOTHER HORRIFYINGLY PERVERTED RAMBLE.
Davesprite: what can i say its a gift
Karkat: I'M GOING TO BE HONEST WITH YOU.
Karkat: I DO NOT HAVE THE ENERGY TO NAVIGATE THE ARBITRARY GORDIAN KNOT OF HUMAN RELATIONSHIPS ON MY OWN RIGHT NOW, SO I'M JUST GOING TO ASK.
Davesprite: ok so gordian knot is a go but isle of misfit toys doesnt make sense to you im glad were being consistent here
Karkat: WHAT HAPPENED TO THE RULES ABOUT THIS STUFF?
Karkat: I THOUGHT HUMANS WERE ALL ABOUT NONSENSICAL ROMANTIC LIMITATIONS.
Davesprite: holy shit looks whos talking
Davesprite: like i have not heard of a single way quadrants did not fuck everything up constantly
Karkat: DAVESPRITE WHO THE FUCK DO YOU THINK I AM?
Karkat: BECAUSE IF THE ANSWER IS SOMEONE WITH ENOUGH PATIENCE TO SIT THROUGH THE METHODICAL CONSTRUCTION OF YOUR LITTLE RAMSHACKLED GREASY EVASION HUT YOU ARE WRONG AS SHIT.
Karkat: AND YOU'RE GOING TO ANSWER MY GODDAMN QUESTIONS BEFORE I GET STUCK IN A SACCHARINE GUEST ROOM TWO DOORS DOWN FROM ONE OF YOUR HATCH MATES.
Karkat: AM I SUPPOSED TO BE RESPECTING YOUR STUPID SOCIETY'S STUPID RULES ABOUT "HOMOSEXUALS" OR NOT?
Davesprite: well i mean on the whole probably not
Davesprite: like barely at all actually theyre terrible
Davesprite: you spent three years with rose why is this conversation happening at me
Karkat: SO YOU'RE SUGGESTING I SHOULD HAVE ASKED ROSE TO SHARE INFORMATION I WOULD HAVE HAD NO WAY OF VERIFYING WITH AN OUTSIDE SOURCE THAT WASN'T METEOR DAVE?
Karkat: WHEN I ALREADY KNEW THEY WERE BORED?
Davesprite: alright thats fair
Karkat: I KNOW THAT FOR SOME REASON HUMANS HAVE DECIDED THEY PRIMARILY PAIR OFF INTO SINGLE SETS OF TWO.
Karkat: AND MOST INDIVIDUALS HAVE A MARKED PREFERENCE FOR EITHER MALES OR FEMALES, WHICH YOU ALL ASSUME MAKES SENSE.
Davesprite: yeah ok see there
Davesprite: most
Davesprite: theres some grey area
Karkat: YOU DON'T SAY.
Karkat: I HAD THE IMPRESSION YOU WERE NOT IN THE GREY AREA.
Davesprite: no the grey area is exactly where id like to leave an impression
Karkat: I'M DOING MY BEST NOT RUN OVER YOUR CREATIVELY USELESS CUSTOMS HERE DAVESPRITE, AT LEAST WORK AN EXPLANATION INTO YOUR INNUENDO.
Davesprite: ok fine im just
Davesprite: maybe its part of being a sprite for a while like maybe the game didnt anticipate its constructs having time for life stuff and didnt want to waste data saving sexual preference
Davesprite: i dunno maybe it was just puberty
Davesprite: oh my god what if it was the bird thing
Davesprite: like what if i fused with a really gay crow
Davesprite: and now im just
Davesprite: half gay crow
Karkat: I DON'T UNDERSTAND ENOUGH OF WHAT YOU JUST SAID TO KNOW IF I SHOULD YELL AT YOU MORE.
Davesprite: shit look what im saying is maybe i wouldnt entirely mind if you sort of disregarded whatever youve heard about human limitations on this one thing for me alright sheesh
Davesprite: since when are you all level headed persistence
Davesprite: shouldnt you be trying to pry your foot out of your mouth by now
Jade: ive been kicking him under the table when he got flaily eyed
Davesprite: what the fuck jade when did you get back
Karkat: SHE HAS BEEN HERE LITERALLY THE ENTIRE TIME.
Davesprite: oh my god
Davesprite: why didnt you say anything
Jade: i wanted to let things play out naturally!
Karkat: NATURALLY, SHE SAYS.
Karkat: I'LL BE SURE TO REMEMBER THAT WHEN THE MASSES ARE COWERING FROM THE GROTESQUE TATTERS HANGING OFF MY KNEES.
Karkat: DON'T BE AFRAID! IT'S NATURAL!
Jade: well if i didnt do something you were going to chicken out!
Jade: like you ALWAYS do
Karkat: DAVESPRITES THE CHICKEN.
Davesprite: i cant believe you just sat here through all of that
Jade: being half gay crow is nothing to be ashamed of, davesprite
Davesprite: oh my god
Jade: you two have my blessing, by the way!
Jade: youre adorable =D
Davesprite: oh my god
Karkat: YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SINK THE PLACE OR CHANGE THE LOCKS OR SOMETHING WHILE WE'RE GONE, RIGHT?
Jade: of course not! you guys are always welcome here
Jade: im not gonna lie though, im looking forward to having the island to myself for a little while
Karkat: YEAH, IT WAS JUST YOU AND YOUR LUSUS BEFORE THE GAME, WASN'T IT?
Jade: yep
Jade: i still miss him sometimes
Jade: but I had two really obnoxious roommates to get me used to living here without him
Karkat: THEY SOUND AWFUL.
Jade: unbearable!
Jade: is davesprite breathing again yet?
Karkat: I DON'T KNOW, ARE YOU BREATHING AGAIN YET DAVESPRITE?
Davesprite: no go away
Karkat: YEAH HE'S FINE.
Jade: so are you two...?
Davesprite: well hes already calling me fine so i guess hes open to it
Karkat: OH FUCK YOU.
Davesprite: geez karkat have some respect theres a lady present
Jade: yeah karkat that was shameless
Karkat: I HATE YOU BOTH.
Davesprite: you like my ass though
Karkat: IT'S NOT AWFUL.
Davesprite: haha nice