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first impressions

Summary:

"Now, now," Shiori hummed as she worked. "Let's give it a try at least, okay Hyuse? Maybe you'll like it more than you think."

"I highly doubt that."

“It’ll be fun, it’ll be fun! You’ll know a lot of people there, anyway.”

“Youtarou doesn’t go to school.”

Shiori laughed so hard that she dropped the pincushion she had been holding. “He’s five, he doesn’t go to school yet. He will when he’s a little older.”

“If it’s not important for a child at his most impressionable age, then there’s no reason for someone like me to go.”

Yuuma hummed, bending down to inspect his shortened pants legs. “Well, when you consider all the things you don’t know about Japan, you’re basically the same age as Youtarou. So you’re also a child at his most impressionable, right?"


Alternatively: Hyuse has a big first day and is thoroughly unamused.

Notes:

Let me sit alone in the tone that you crave
Angry again
No, I don't wanna have a conversation with you
Angry again


I Don't Even Care About You, MISSIO

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

"I hate this."

 

Hyuse, who prided himself on being a paragon of stoicism and unreadable expressions, couldn’t stop the expression coloring his face. It wasn’t like he could see himself, but he knew that he could not have looked more miserable if he tried.

 

His face was twisted into something between a scowl and a pout that screamed 'save me ', brow furrowed so hard that he was mildly concerned it might actually permanently wrinkle.

 

Yuuma couldn't hide his laugh fast enough, though it was doubtful that he had really tried to do so in the first place.

 

Hyuse shot him a dangerous glare.

 

Yuma waved it away, and the motion only served to ruffle his feathers more.

 

The two of them stood in matching school uniforms, Yuma's own pooling slightly around the hands and feet. Shiori stood beside him, looking just as amused as she pinned the excess fabric and marked measurements in soft chalk lines.

 

"It's not that bad, Hyuse," she offered in as even a voice as she could muster.

 

"It's not that different from our squad uniforms," Yuuma agreed.

 

He crossed his arms, curling in on himself in protest. He hated this. "I'm not going to school. I didn't agree to this."

 

"Middle school was lots of fun, Hyuse. I bet high school will be just as good."

 

"I find that hard to believe,” he scoffed. This was pointless. Useless. There was no need for this. “I won’t learn anything there that’ll actually serve me well. This is nothing more than an exercise in futility."

 

"You arguing? Yes, yes. You've got a point."

 

He frowned again, immediately unbuttoning the stiff collar of his uniform jacket in a huff. Hyuse didn't choose to come here the way Yuma had. He hadn’t chosen to stay , either. Chosen to not be able to go home, to not have a home to return to. This was just another dictation in a long line of decisions about his life and how it should be made by people who weren’t him. And he was tired of it. He supposed, somewhere in the back of his mind, he had understood the rationale. Technically, he was ‘free’ now that any meaningful ties to his homeland were severed and the conflict was, for now, settled. He didn’t have anywhere else to go, and had to assimilate whether he wanted to or not. He had to make this a ‘home’ and ‘fit in’ and be like the others.

 

And he didn’t want to . He didn’t want to go to school and learn about whatever it was they taught there and be surrounded by humans who didn’t understand him the same way he didn’t understand them. He wanted to leave. No matter what staying would have meant, he wanted to go home . Even at the cost of his life, he just wanted to be the one to have made that decision. And to have it respected, not to be pulled away from the only place he really wanted to be and the people he wanted to save. That was his job, his life . That’s why he was there .

 

It was so unfair to be robbed of that, for something as stupid and trivial as ‘school’. 

 

Hyuse shrugged out of the jacket, tossing it haphazardly across the back of the chair beside him. Maybe it was childish, and went against the years of discipline that had been ingrained in him. But it could be his choice to be childish and throw a jacket if he wanted it to be. Just this once.

 

"Now, now," Shiori hummed as she worked. "Let's give it a try at least, okay Hyuse? Maybe you'll like it more than you think."

 

"I highly doubt that."

 

“It’ll be fun, it’ll be fun! You’ll know a lot of people there, anyway.”

 

“Youtarou doesn’t go to school.”

 

Shiori laughed so hard that she dropped the pincushion she had been holding. “He’s five , he doesn’t go to school yet . He will when he’s a little older.”

 

“If it’s not important for a child at his most impressionable age, then there’s no reason for someone like me to go.”

 

Yuuma hummed, bending down to inspect his shortened pants legs. “Well, when you consider all the things you don’t know about Japan, you’re basically the same age as Youtarou. So you’re also a child at his most impressionable, right?"

 

“Ohooo~ That’s right, that’s right. Hyuse is still just a baby.”

 

He snatched up the uniform jacket, only to throw it on the floor at their feet as he stormed out of the room.

 

I’m not going!”

 

 

He had only been on campus for five minutes before he decided that, beyond a shadow of a doubt, he hated this. Surely five minutes counted as ‘giving it a try’. This should be sufficient.

 

He thought he would be sneaky and just avoid going by pretending to have left until everyone else was gone and it was just him and Youtarou. Surely Youtarou could keep a secret. But then Yuuma had started hovering around him, insisting they walk together since they were headed the same way, and before he knew it they were meeting Osamu at the gate and approaching the class lists.

 

Already, he was ready to leave. This uniform itched. There were too many people. He didn’t know what he was supposed to do here .

 

Other students pressed in around him, much too close for his liking. He stepped closer to his teammates, if only to escape the crowd a tiny bit more. The pricking sensation of people staring was hard to ignore, and only made him feel more ridiculous for being here.

 

Yuuma was squinting up at the board, peering at all the papers and scanning for their names. Osamu stood beside him, leaning over slightly with a hand on the other’s shoulder.

 

“Hmm... Bad luck, Osamu. We're in different classes,” Yuuma sighed. “But, I guess that just means more new friends to make, right?”

 

“Yeah. We’ll see each other around still, too. At lunch, and stuff. Hyuse, you come eat with us, too.”

 

“Hn.”

 

The other two brushed him off without a second thought, moving further down the line through the crowd of students to read the rest of the lists. Yuuma pushed his way to the front, trailing a finger down the names in his hunt.

 

“Let’s see, let’s see. Hyuuuse, Hyuuuuuse.”

 

"Oh, he's there, Yuuma." Osamu pointed, turning to face Hyuse. He was hovering just behind Osamu, trying to stay close enough to not be swallowed up by the crowd but distant enough to remain aloof. “You’re in 2-E, Hyuse. Do you know how to find your classroom?”

 

“It can't be hard. I'll figure it out on my own.”

 

“It's not as big as HQ, don't worry."

 

“I'm not worried.”

 

Yuuma turned back to them, finger on the class lost. "Hyuse! Guess who's in your class!"

 

He huffed, turning and starting to make his way through the sea of students. He hadn't been worried about getting lost trying to find his class, but it occurred to him now that it'd be easier to find with less people in the halls.

 

"I don't care," Hyuse called back over his shoulder as he left. It didn’t matter. It wouldn’t change anything. It's not like he had friends here, anyway.

 

 

It wasn't as hard as he had been led to believe to find his classroom. They were all labeled, for starters. And once he understood the general organization, it was easy to locate his own classroom on the third floor.

 

Hyuse slid in quietly, one of only a few students who had meandered in so far, and tucked himself into one of the backmost desks to hide.

 

No. Not hide.

 

He was simply waiting and biding his time. It was a strategic and tactical position.

 

"Hey! It's Hyuston!"

 

He lifted his head, blinking slowly at the blond figure running at him from the doorway. Koarai bounded over, throwing his bag onto the seat next to him as he dropped heavily into the seat.

 

"I can't believe we're in the same class, how cool is that? Okudera and Taichi, too."

 

Hyuse continued to stare, and now Koarai was leaning way too close and staring expectantly at him. Was he supposed to care about this? It's not like he was particularly friendly with them at all. He had done solo rank wars on occasion with Koarai and his teammate, but he wouldn't consider that as something that warranted this level of familiarity. And he didn't even know who the hell Taichi was. Another Border agent, he assumed.

 

"There's a lot of us in this grade, y'know? Satoken and Sasamori are next door. One on either side! Oh, and Karasuma from your branch is in 2-C."

 

Hyuse perked up a little, though he did his best to keep his expression neutral. He hadn’t realized Torimaru was here, too. Although he wouldn’t consider Torimaru a friend any more than he would the rest of Tamakoma, it was a comfort knowing there was another more than familiar face close by. Still, by the look on Koarai’s face, he felt like he was supposed to be saying something in return and he wasn’t about to admit that he was relieved to have a not-friend down the hall.

 

"Osamu and Yuuma are downstairs."

 

"Oh, cool! First years, right?"

 

Hyuse shrugged. He was tired of this already. Koarai made a slight face, leaning back into his own space.

 

“Not a big talker, huh? I guess that makes sense, you seem like the cool and aloof type, y’know? You’ve got that tall, hot, and mysterious vibe. And you’re from Canada! I bet the girls are gonna be all over you, for sure. But, we’re all on the same team though, so let’s be friends!”

 

“We’re not on the same team.”

 

Koarai stared, mouth open as if he was going to say something but had stopped himself. Hyuse didn’t understand why he was so confused.

 

“You’re with Azuma Squad. I’m with Tamakoma.”

 

The other snorted, and then leaned back dangerously in his chair with a full laugh. Hyuse still didn’t get the joke.

 

“You’re alright, Hyuse.”

 

He didn’t recall asking his opinion. He’d been about to voice as much when more people had filed into the class, one Hyuse recognized and one he recognized less. They both scanned the room briefly before beelining straight for him and Koarai. In response, Hyuse slumped further down in his seat. He missed his hoodie. He’d kill for a shield right now to cut himself off from this.

 

The both slid into the seats in front of them, eyes not leaving the pair. Hyuse refused to meet their looks, even as another face pressed further into his personal space that he was comfortable with.

 

“Hey, hey! You’re from Tamakoma, right? I didn’t know you went to our school.”

 

Briefly, Hyuse met his stare and then it clicked. He looked away again. “Not before, but I do now. I didn’t recognize you when you weren’t crawling on the floor.”

 

“Ughhhh, no!” He leaned back, though his hands were pressed flat to Hyuse’s desk. He supposed it counted as having more personal space, at least. “Don’t bring that up, that’s so embarrassing! I thought that was gonna be way cooler than it was, it played out way different in my head.”

 

Okudera shook his head, exasperated. Koarai laughed. Hyuse looked at the clock. First period hadn’t even started.

 

This day was already too long.

 

 

As expected, the first half of the day had been…tiring. Class was boring, and he didn’t particularly care what they were trying to teach. It was also difficult to focus, since he still hadn’t learned to really read any Meeden languages yet. He knew small things, but nothing that helped make any of the characters the teacher wrote make sense.

 

It wasn’t worth the effort to really try, anyway.

 

He pretended to take notes, copying down anything that sounded interesting in his native tongue or just scribbling out long sentences of how much he wanted to be anywhere but here. He wondered what Youtarou was up to, back at the branch office doing whatever it was he did when almost everyone else was out. He sketched. He daydreamed.

 

Mostly, he tried to make himself as unnoticeable and unremarkable as possible so that no one else would bother him. He didn’t want to be called on, he didn’t want to have any conversations. He just wanted to go home, tell them he’d put in a token effort and that he’d never be attending again, and then return to the relative routine he’d established here before everything had changed.

 

During every break, Hyuse’s plans fell spectacularly to shit.

 

The other Border agents in his class talked incessantly, constantly trying to drag him into their orbit and make him indulge whatever passing thought they had.

 

Other students would approach him, always asking the same sorts of questions.

 

“You’re a foreigner, right? Where are you from?” ( Canada. British Columbia. Victoria. )

 

“Do you like going by your last name?” ( No, never.)

 

“Why did you move here?” ( Koarai would butt in, proudly explaining that Hyuse worked with Border like he did and try to turn the conversation to himself instead.)

 

“What do your parents do?” 

 

“How did you learn Japanese so well?”

 

“What do you do for fun?”

 

“Do you want to eat lunch together?”

 

“Do you miss Canada?”

 

( He’d ignore them until they realized the conversation had ended.)

 

When the lunch bell rang, it was Taichi who turned to him first, taking advantage of his spot directly in front of him.

 

“Hyuse! Wanna eat with us? We usually hang out in the cafeteria with some other people from Border.”

 

“We have to eat there or Taichi makes too big of a mess.”

 

Hyuse pretended to ponder this for a moment, then shook his head. “I’ll pass. I have plans already.”

 

Plans to bail as quickly as possible. If he slipped out now, he could leave and go home before anyone noticed. Half a day was good enough. This was so pointless, to stay any longer would be a waste.

 

“Oh, are you eating with Mikumo and Kuga?” Okudera asked, glancing towards the back door of their class.

 

“No.”

 

“Really? Because it looks like they’re waiting for you.” He motioned with his chin towards the door, and Hyuse followed his gaze to see that they were, in fact, standing just beyond the doorway. 

 

Yuuma, catching his eyes, started beckoning him with his hand. Hyuse looked away and pretended not to notice.

 

“You’re just gonna leave them there? That’s cold, dude.” Koarai snickered, then turned and held  his hand up. “You guys! Come eat with us, too. We’re heading down to the cafeteria.”

 

He took a moment to glare at Koarai before looking back to his teammates. Yuuma looked pleased, giving a big thumbs up. Osamu also gave him a small nod. Hyuse glared at them, too. For now, at least, this hiccup in his escape was all their doing and he would hold them accountable accordingly.

 

Later. When they were least expecting it.

 

The chatter of the other boys felt almost suffocating as he trudged along behind them, unable to stop staring out the many windows and trying to judge how poorly it would go should he just jump out and run. He was in a trion body because of his horns, so it’s not like he’d be injured. And any damages were rightfully Rindou’s responsibility anyway, considering it was his fault Hyuse was here to begin with.

 

A few more people he vaguely recognized joined them as they settled at their table, and the conversation grew more animated.

 

The only thing getting him through it was the curry Osamu had ordered for him (since he couldn’t read any of the options) and the fact that he’d been gracefully given a spoon, lest he garner any further unwanted attention from the perfectly valid way he wielded his chopsticks.

 

 

“Oh, so. I have a question for you.”

 

Hyuse stared blankly back at Okudera, and then turned to stare at the open doorway to their classroom. He’d been so close. So close . The bell had rung, classes were over, his things had been packed for the last thirty minutes, and he wanted to leave .

 

But, all three of them were hovering. Waiting for both the question and the answer.

 

“What.”

 

“This was your first time at a school in Japan, right? Is it really different from in Canada?”

 

Shit . He hadn’t really had to think through this kind of answer before. He shrugged, instead. It’d be easy enough to lie.

 

“More or less.”

 

Okudera nodded, shouldering his own bag as he finished packing. Taichi was fighting his chair, having wrapped the strap of his bag around it somehow and having more difficulty than any one person should in releasing it.

 

“What’s the most similar part? I’ve never been abroad, that’s so cool. I wanna know everything!” he said as he continued to pull at the trapped accessory.

 

Hyuse shrugged again. “Lunch, I guess.”

 

The other three laughed. Hyuse took that as a sign that the interrogation had ended.

 

“How big was your last school compared to this one?”

 

It had been a bad sign, clearly.

 

He moved towards the door, having intended on just leaving without another word. When the others moved to follow him, Taichi now free of his desk and skipping along beside them, he cursed the part of his brain that had truly believed it would be that easy.

 

“I was…homeschooled.”

 

“Wow, really? Like, just you and your parents?”

 

He supposed you could think of it in that way, though his guardians hadn’t been involved at all. It’d just been him and Viza, and they focused more on battle and swordplay than arithmetic and grammar lessons. Sometimes they’d expand their circle, whenever training called for it. Include other children from all different houses who came and went, improving or being cut down, being sold and traded and passed along if they survived in the first place.

 

Not necessarily anything like this, though somehow this felt more like a prison than any other experience of his–including his time as an actual prisoner after being abandoned by his team.

 

“No, I had a tutor,” Hyuse answered as he returned his mind to the conversation. “My guardians weren’t involved.”

 

“Guardians, huh?”

 

Hyuse didn’t respond. He had no reason to explain his situation to them. They weren’t friends. And, after he got home, they wouldn’t be classmates, either.

 

They weren’t owed anything.

 

“I’m going home.” The words felt hollow. Tamakoma wasn’t his home. “Bye.”

 

It was a small mercy that none of them made an attempt to follow. It was a bigger mercy that he hadn’t encountered his own teammates on his way out, either. He could head back to the branch office in peace, without having to listen to anyone else for the first time today.

 

The city wasn't so disorienting that it was hard to find his way back to the office from the school. He had a relatively good head for directions--with enough landmarks, he could get there pretty easily.

 

Wasn't he independent enough? Maybe he could find a way back on his own. It'd be difficult, sure. But it would be doable...right?

 

Was it worth it, given everything that had happened?

 

Meeden was making him soft.

 

 

Hyuse wasn't expecting any kind of fanfare or praise when he returned. It wasn't as if suffering through a day of school was particularly praise-worthy, even if it had severely tested the limits of his patience. He'd been given a job and he did it. Simple.

 

But, when Youtarou rushed him at the door, even he had to admit it was a nice feeling.

 

"Hyuse! Did you work hard today?" He asked, arms wrapped around Raijinmaru's neck.

 

"I suppose."

 

"Hmm...good, good. I exspect nothing less from my pupil. I'm proud of you, Hyuse."

 

He smiled despite himself, reaching down to pat the smaller boy on his head. "Thanks, sensei."

 

"I wanna come next time so we can play."

 

"Okay."

 

From a little further back, he heard someone clear his throat. Hyuse glanced up, narrowing his eyes at the director, who was staring at him with a look of bemusement.

 

"As smart as he is,, I don't think Youtarou's quite ready for high school. Your teachers might have something to say about that."

 

"I don't care. I'm not going back, anyway."

 

Rindou quirked an eyebrow, motioning over his shoulder with his head. "That so? Let's go chat, then."

 

"You won't change my mind."

 

"I wasn't going to try. We'll just have to fill out some paperwork."

 

Hyuse stared at him, not quite believing it. But, if it was a means to an end, he supposed he didn't really have a choice.

 

"Fine. Let's talk."

 

He followed reluctantly, Youtarou staying behind after deeming such a conversation too boring.

 

As the door shut behind him, Hyuse sunk as deeply as he could into the chair, arms crossed over his chest and curling into himself. Already on the defensive.

 

"So," Rindou started as he slotted himself behind his desk. "Bad first day?"

 

"It was pointless. And a waste of all of our time."

 

"Oh?"

 

"I'm not accomplishing anything there that makes it worth going."

 

The director continued to stare, waiting for further explanation. Hyuse felt he'd already explained himself sufficiently enough, and sighed.

 

"I'm better suited to focus on training and improving those skills. It'll be more efficient and the smarter decision. I don't have any need for a Meeden education."

 

“Well, I guess that makes sense.” Rindou leaned forward onto his elbows, hands folded under his chin. “If you don’t think you can handle it, Hyuse, then you don’t have to go back.”

 

He sat up straighter, frowning. What was that supposed to mean? If he could handle it? As if this compared to every other burden he’d had to shoulder?

 

“I won’t force you if it’s too much for you.”

 

Oh. 

 

He grit his teeth. He knew he was being manipulated. He could feel it. But he’d be damned if he admitted defeat to anything else on Meeden.

 

“Forget it. I’ll be there tomorrow.” He stood and turned to leave, and then whipped back around to level another stare at the director. Catching the hint of a smile on the other’s face only incensed him more. It was frustrating, being made to feel like a fool for playing right into his hands.

 

“And I need to be able to read the written language.”

 

“That so? Okay, we’ll get something arranged for you.”

 

“I expect nothing less if you want me to ‘handle’ this effectively. It’s your job.”

 

The director laughed, too amused. What was wrong with these people? “Who knew you’d be so studious after only one day in a school? You’re turning into a sponge, just going to soak up all the knowledge you can.”

 

“Don't be ridiculous. Sponges don't retain anything. I don't intend on learning any useless information, but I will win at 'school'."

 

"That's the spirit."

Notes:

I want to come through, persist
I'm going to form all my selves into the shape of a fist
I'll be going at the air until there's room to exist
I'm gonna get up, get up, get up, get up, get up, get up


Get Up, The Blow

*

sdfasdfasdf okay i just.....i just drove 6 hours and all i could think of the ENTIRE TIME was.....hyuse school musical. that's my personal doc title for this and i just needed this to be known. BUT anyway i!!!! love hyuse!!!! i want hyuse to stay!!!!! and so i have this!!!!!! i don't care what happens in canon unless it's hyuse staying and making friends and being happy bc i love him so anyway pls enjoy hyuse trying to navigate high school and also i apologize in advance for anything that will happen and any weirdness bc i am an idiot and from the us, and i did not attend high school as i was born fully formed and enrolled in college

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