Chapter Text
Louis was discharged four days later and, as promised, Harry had returned to visit him every day, taking Ruby with him every single time.
There was a frequent coming and going of Louis’ friends, patients who came to visit him, bringing him flowers or drawings that the children had made for him, bringing all the joy that had been missing those days. It was proof of what an extraordinary person Louis was, loved by so many people, and it was everything the man deserved. Even more extraordinary was seeing Louis turn to Harry to show him the drawings, searching for his gaze between visits to make sure he stayed a little longer, always a little longer.
On the second day after waking up, Louis received a visit from the man who was driving the car that crashed into Louis’. It was a very emotional day that he proved once again what a wonderful person Louis really was. Just Lottie and Harry were there, when Louis’ sister explained to him what had happened that night, how the man had reacted to Louis’ accident and condition, and asked him if it was okay to meet him, just as the man had begged.
“Why shouldn't I meet him?” It was Louis’ answer. “Sounds like he went through hell, too.”
Harry's heart melted at those words: Louis was truly a rare human being.
When he arrived, the man in question seemed insecure, worried and above all desperate: it was crystal clear that he was sorry for what happened, that the last few days had been a nightmare for him and in the moment Louis said a simple “hello”, the man cried. He apologized a hundred times, telling him how relieved he was that he was fine.
“Hey, listen,” Louis kindly interrupted his desperate rant, letting him talk until that moment. “Why don't we start from the bases, yeah? I don't even know your name.”
“Jake,” the man replied, blowing his nose into a tissue.
“I’m Louis, nice to meet you,” Louis introduced himself, reaching out his good hand. Jake squeezed it right away.
“I’m so sorry, I didn't mean to hurt you,” the man repeated.
“Of course you didn't, otherwise you wouldn't be here to tell me,” Louis smiled. “I'm fine though, see? They’ll release me in two days, they said. Everything’s good.”
“You really are ... I have no words. You have a heart of gold. Other people wouldn't have reacted like this, ”commented Jake.
The man expressed aloud what Harry was thinking. He was increasingly enchanted by the goodness of Louis and his family.
Jake left shortly after that, claiming he wanted to run to his wife to tell her the good news. After that moving moment, it was time for Harry to go, despite Louis’ pouting was an adorable temptation to stay.
Harry had just walked out the room when he saw a person coming his way. Someone he never thought would show up there, although the rational part of his mind reminded him that it was only logical to do so. A person Harry hasn't thought about for a long time now. When he saw him walking towards the room, Harry immediately went back inside.
“Did you forget something?” Louis asked.
“No, but um- Tom’s coming,” Harry said. Your ex-boyfriend Tom, his mind supplied. “I just saw him coming this way.”
He didn't know how Louis would react to that, if he’d be happy to see Tom again or not. Anyway, Harry would stay and see what was going to happen.
Louis didn't have time to say anything, because there was a knock on the door and a moment later, Tom appeared.
“Can I?” he asked, uncertain.
Harry was brought back in time, to the first time he met him, when Ruby was only one month old and Louis was really just their pediatrician, without too many complications. He remembered thinking that he looked like a model next to Louis, but seeing him now Harry realized that Louis was the most beautiful of the two, without any doubt.
“Tom!” Louis exclaimed, still incredulous. “Of course, come in!”
“Hey, Louis,” he said, then turned to Lottie and hugged her. “Hi Lottie. It's been a long time, how are you?”
“Hi Tom,” Lottie was smiling kindly at him. “Good, all things considered.”
Harry realized there must be a good relationship between them, or at least there was when Louis and Tom were together.
“I heard about what happened and I couldn’t not come to see you,” Tom explained, giving him a box of chocolate. “Your favorite,” he said.
“Oh my, thank you, you didn't have to,” Louis replied enthusiastically, immediately taking a bite and moaning at the taste.
“What happened? How are you?”
“I'm fine now. A little beaten up,” Louis raised his arm in the sling. “It was nice of you to come.”
Tom approached him. “Can I hug you?”
“‘Course.”
There, in that moment, Harry wished that Louis’ big heart was a bit smaller.
Tom bent over Louis and Harry carefully watched every single movement.
“I'm happy to see you,” he heard Tom whisper.
Harry clenched his hands, annoyed: we’re all good at being supportive when the worst had passed, he thought barely resisting the urge to roll his eyes. Why hadn't he shown up earlier?
Harry was about to grab Tom and drag him away from Louis when Louis said, “I’m happy to see you, too.”
The hug lasted longer than any normal hug and Harry could no longer hold back; he pretended to cough.
Tom looked up and made a surprised “Oh”, as if only then he noticed Harry's presence. He stepped back from Louis, without going too far though, and said, “ Uh, Harry, right?”
“Yeah, I’m Harry,” he replied, with a forced smile.
“How are you?” Louis asked instead to Tom. “How's your job going?”
“Good, yeah, I'm fine.”
Tom started talking about things that Harry had no interest in, between military exercises and the mistreatment of his superiors, so he didn't listen.
Lottie stood beside him and nudged him lightly. Harry looked at her questioningly.
“You have no reason to be jealous,” she whispered to him.
“I'm not jealous,” he replied indignantly. He didn't know what she was talking about. “I just think it's very convenient for him to be here when the worst has already passed.”
“Mh mh,” Lottie hummed with a knowing smirk, too similar to her brother’s.
“What are you two whispering about?” Louis addressed them.
Harry smiled at Tom's annoyed face from no longer having Louis’ attention on him and quickly replied “Nothing, Lou. Don’t worry,” because he knew Lottie would have the guts to say he was jealous.
“When are you going back home?” Tom asked.
“In two days, finally. I can't wait to go home.”
Louis was so excited, and it was understandable: like everyone else, he too wanted to leave this story behind and leaving the hospital was the first big step. Louis’ excitement was short-lived, though.
“You don't really think you're going back to your house, do you?” Lottie laughed incredulously at her brother.
“Uh, yes?”
“Uh no, dear brother of mine. You’re coming home with me.”
“In London!? I don’t think so!”
“I can't leave you on your own!”
Lottie’s decision to bring her brother home with her didn’t allow any protests and was also the safest option, Harry had to admit it, despite the thought of not being able to see Louis for a while made him sad.
“Oh, come on, Lots! I just have one fractured arm, and I'm an adult,” Louis protested. “Do you know how many people live alone and are worse off than me?”
Lottie rolled her eyes. “Like I give a fuck about other people, Louis,” she replied harshly. “You’re staying with me. I already talked to the others about it and they all think is a good idea, so.”
Louis huffed and pouted, not looking like an adult at all. “Be reasonable. I can't go from London to Cambridge for therapy every day.”
The two siblings continued arguing about hospitals, doctors and house arrangements for a few minutes, neither of them backing down from their idea.
“I don't want you to be on your own!” Lottie snapped, irritated.
“I won't be! I’ll stay at someone’s place!” Louis yelled back.
“Who, Niall? He’s a wonderful man, but I’ve seen his house, Louis. Or Liam, who practically lives more in the hospital than in his own home.” Lottie snorted. “You’re coming with us. Or better yet,” she paused for a second before smirking. “We all move in with you.”
Louis let out an exasperated scream and Harry raised his eyebrows, amused.
“You look like my daughter right now, Lou,” he noted, laughing when the other man glared at him
“Not. Helping.”
“I don't understand why you don't want to, Louis,” Lottie said, finally losing her temper. “You’re my brother, we’re all we have, we’re still each other responsibility!”
Finally, Louis stopped arguing: hearing her words cut deep in his heart and a terse silence fell until Tom who broke it.
“You can come and stay with me,” he suggested, as if it were the most natural thing in the world. “We’ve lived together for a long time, you know I can take care of you. And I’m still in our home, so you have every comfort to get to the hospital. It's perfect.”
Harry didn't think he ever looked at someone as badly as Tom as soon as those words came out of his mouth.
Louis' eyebrows shot up so much that they almost disappeared into his hairline. “Tom, we broke up and haven't talked to each other in months, it's not really a good idea,” he said kindly.
“But we can try,” Tom smiled at him, encouraging.
Harry widened his eyes and was about to interfere when Lottie put a hand on his arm. “Let's give them some privacy.”
“But-”
“Thanks, Lots,” Louis said immediately.
Harry's heart shattered into a thousand pieces. Louis preferred to talk to Tom alone and to tell him what? That he wanted to try and be together again? Harry doubted it, but after all they had loved each other for so many years, how could he stop them? What if Louis still had feelings for Tom?
“There is no need, though,” Louis kept saying, before turning to his ex-boyfriend. “Tom, I appreciate the offer, believe me I do, but there’s nothing to try anymore. I'm sorry.” Harry did his best to mask his relief. “Thanks for coming to see me, it made me really happy, but if you came here for other reasons, I'm sorry to disappoint you,” he concluded in a serious and determined voice, eyes sad.
“Louis,” Tom tried, but he didn't know what else to say. “I’m sorry. I’d better go,” he said after a while. “Bye Lou, bye Lottie.”
“Bye Tom. Thanks for stopping by,” Louis said, but the man was out of the room before he finished the sentence.
“Poor guy,” Lottie commented.
“I don't know what he was thinking. I never thought he’d want to get back together,” Louis murmured, still surprised.
Harry couldn't believe it either: his mind had blacked out at the idea that Louis could still be in love with another man and forget about him and Ruby.
“You can come live with me.”
The words were out of his mouth before Harry could rationally think about what that suggestion implied. Louis sharply turned to look at him, while Lottie crossed her arms and smirked. Harry pretended to be nonchalance about it, but he was freaking out.
“Ruby can stay in my room,” he began to explain, trying to reason with Louis or himself, he wasn’t too sure. “And Ashley has one of those folding beds with the mattress, you know? She’ll lend it to me for sure if I ask her.”
Not wanting to see Louis’ reaction, Harry turned his head towards the window and looked outside.
“I know it’s not much, the bedroom’s small, but I’m basically always at home. I mean, I don't have to go to work.”
And I can take care of you, he wanted to add, but he refrained. Louis wasn't the type of person who liked to be treated as if he couldn't do something on his own, and it was a trait he shared with Harry. The only difference between them was that Louis had no problem accepting or asking for help from others.
When nobody answered, Harry decided to look at Louis and Lottie to understand why they were’t talking. Was it such a horrible idea? Lottie’s expression let him know that she wasn’t falling for any of his nonchalance crap and she looked pretty smug. She was probably asking herself why she hadn’t thought about it herself.
Louis, on the other hand, seemed hesitant. “Haz, I don't want to be a burden to you,” he said. “You already have Ruby to look after.”
“I think staying with Harry is a great idea,” Lottie intervened before Harry could protest and convince Louis that he wasn’t a burden at all. “I know I can trust him with you, because if he takes care of a little girl, he knows perfectly well how to keep up with Louis 24 hours a day.”
“Oh my god, Charlotte!” Louis exclaimed offended, but she ignored him.
“I vote for Harry,” she repeated.
“Thanks Lottie,” Harry smiled at her. “You wouldn't be a burden at all, Lou. In fact, you’d help me with Ruby and having someone to chat with who is over 14 months old wouldn't be bad.”
Louis made a grimace, probably about to turn Harry down. “Look-”
“No,” Harry cut him off immediately. “I know why you want to keep your distance, but I want you to give me one last chance.” In saying so, Harry moved closer to Louis to look him straight in the eye. “I want you to come live with me for a while. Until you get better, not a day longer. I’d like to make up for lost time, you know? Get our friendship back on its feet. I can't force you, of course, so if you don’t want to or if you’d feel uncomfortable, then it’s fine. Just don't say no without a good reason.”
Louis stared at Harry in a mixture of confusion and surprise in his eyes, but then he simply said, “Okay.”
“Yeah?” Harry asked, smiling happily.
Louis also smiled. “Yes, let’s do it. I'll make your life so much fun.”
Harry laughed. “Between you and Ruby, it sounds more like a threat.”
“Are you absolutely sure that she’ll have no problem with me living with you guys?”
“You’re not a stranger! She loves you, she’ll be happy, believe me. Don’t worry that pretty head of yours," Harry said, tapping his finger on Louis' temple.
The pediatrician reached out and grabbed Harry's. “You've changed.”
“Maybe.”
Both momentarily forgot about Lottie, who looked at them with a satisfied and happy smile.
…
On Louis' release day, everyone was there: his whole family, Niall, Liam, his stepfather Mark, and even Cara, who had become fond of Louis and always sneaked in to check up on him. They were all happy to see him go home, because after all they had gone through, between the fear and doubts of never living that day, it seemed like a miracle worth celebrating.
The celebration continued on at Harry's place, a little tight to fit everyone, but nobody complained. Harry had a weird warm feeling about having them all there and his heart expanded and tightened at the same time.
Louis was moved when he was Ruby's room, now his own for the time being, furnished almost exactly like the one in his house. Liam and Niall had gone to their friend's home and had taken Louis’ clothes, shoes and a few things to be placed in the new room at Harry's house. Louis' sisters had instead bought him his favorite snacks, and a new phone from their grandparents. Louis’ old phone wasn’t totally destroyed, it just had a broken screen, so Louis was able to all his data (and even the voicemail, Harry guessed).
“You guys have done too much,” Louis murmured with tears in his eyes. “Thank you.”
“Lou, we’re your family. If we don't help each other, who’s going to do it?” Fizzy said, hugging his brother tightly.
The group didn’t stay for long, much to Ruby’s disappointment - she was having so much fun with Daisy and Phoebe, Louis’ twin sisters, and the younger twins Doris and Ernest. Louis was still under the influence of painkillers, so when the house was empty, he collapsed on the sofa and fell asleep a minute later.
Ruby was instead full of energy: the baby girl was more than happy to have Louis at home and to be able to sleep in the same room as her father.
Harry wondered what it was going to be like to live with Louis, what it’d mean for both of them and he was excited to find out. Harry had never had a roommate, he had always lived on his own since he left home, so he hoped he was going to do anything that could make Louis uncomfortable.
…
“Mmh, smells good,” a voice behind him said.
Harry jumped, scared to death; he turned and saw Louis in pajamas, looking incredibly soft with his tangled hair and sleepy face. Harry didn't have it in him to glare at Louis for giving him a jump scare.
“Lou-eee!” Ruby exclaimed, who wiggled to get down from where she was sitting on the kitchen counter.
“Oi, Ruby! What are you two cooking?” Louis asked and the girl reached out, wanting to get picked up. Louis’ face fell. “Oh, darling, I can't. I'm sorry.”
“Ruby, Louis is hurt, see?” Harry intervened, pointing to the sling around the man’s arm. “He can't carry you, now.”
Ruby looked confused for a moment, before her eyes lit up and started blowing kissing at Louis. She clearly wanted to kiss it better.
Harry laughed and picked her up. The little girl stretched and kissed Louis’ arm, before pulling a disgusted face. Both Harry and Louis doubled over with laughter.
“Try giving Louis a kiss on the cheek, love,” Harry suggested, pointing at her own face. Ruby nodded and kissed Louis' cheek.
“Oh my, I’m already felling a lot better!” Louis exclaimed, even if it wasn’t true.
Ruby clapped her hands, proud of herself. Harry made her sit where he was preparing dinner, but the girl didn't want to stay there, so he let her on the floor, watching her wobbling her way to the living room. It was a clear sign that she wanted to watch the telly, so Harry put some cartoon on, and then went back to the kitchen to check on dinner.
“What is it that smells so good?” Louis asked.
“Chicken pie, I hope you like it,” Harry replied, smiling to see Louis sniffing the air.
“Anything is better than hospital food.”
It wasn’t difficult for Harry to let himself fall into the domestic and happy atmosphere that there was between them, since they had already eaten all three together several times. Louis constantly complained that he wanted to help and couldn’t just take advantage of Harry’s kindness, so to shut him up, Harry gave him the job of throwing the trash away and put the leftovers in the fridge.
After dinner, all three of them sat on the couch, Ruby placed in the middle, and watched The Lion King, one of the classics and Harry’s personal favorite. They didn't even make it halfway before Ruby fell asleep, too tired after not having her usual afternoon nap.
“I wish I could fall asleep like her,” Louis said, when Harry returned to the living room after tucking his daughter's in and kissing her goodnight.
“Why? Does your arm bother you a lot?”
“No, no. I mean yes, a little, but I mean, I slept all the afternoon, so now I'm not really tired.”
“We can watch another movie.”
Louis waved a hand. “Nah, you must be dead tired. Go ahead and rest.”
“I'm not tired,” Harry insisted. “I'm going to get my laptop. I have a list of movies I want to watch.”
He didn't wait for Louis to answer; he sneaked into his room so he wouldn’t wake Ruby and quickly took the laptop, then closed the door softly behind him.
Louis looked at him in silence and decided that arguing was useless, so he just whispered a sweet, “Thanks, H.”
Harry shook his head. “You don't have to thank me.”
They both looked at Harry’s list a few minutes, before Louis pointed at a title. Weekend, it was called.
“I’ve never heard of this one. What is it about?”
“It’s about these two guys who meet in a club and sleep together. They kind of bond, but one of them has to leave for the States,” Harry explained, remembering what he had read on Wikipedia long ago.
“So, funny,” Louis joked.
“We can watch something else! We can check if there’s something good on Netflix.”
“No, it’s fine. Now I’m curious.”
“Sure?”
“I’m sure.”
Harry took the remote control and turned off the television, placed his laptop on a pile of magazines and books that he kept on the table, so that the screen was high enough for both of them to look at comfortably.
“Can you see?” Harry checked before pressing play and Louis nodded.
Without Ruby between them and with the screen so small, the two men were pressing against each other, touching from shoulders to hips. Their hands brushed a couple of times under the blanket, which Harry used to cover them both.
The movie had quite a few explicit scenes that didn’t really help Harry relax: he desperately wanted to pause it and say he didn’t know it’d be like that, but at the same time he didn’t want to seem like a prude. He was just terrified that Louis would be uncomfortable, but the other man seemed pretty engrossed in the movie gave and gave no sign of being embarrassed or something.
The movie was actually very interesting as it highlighted two ways of experiencing homosexuality and, as expected, the ending wasn’t a happy one.
“What a fucking sad ending,” was the only thing Harry could say.
He expected Louis to say something too, but he didn't: he was strangely silent. Harry turned to look at him, thinking maybe he had fallen asleep, but what he saw surprised him. Louis had tears in his eyes, one running down his cheek.
“Oh, Lou.”
“They loved each other,” Louis whispered. “They loved each other and they are complete opposite. And he's really gone. He just left. It’s not right.”
“I know.”
“I don't know why I'm reacting like this,” Louis complained, rushing to wipe away the tears. “I'm an idiot.”
“It’s okay, Lou,” Harry reassured him, daring to put an arm around his shoulders. “It’s okay to cry. It was pretty sad.”
Louis sniffed and placed his head on Harry's shoulder. “They were so beautiful together,” he sighed. “Even if they had two completely different views on life.”
“I think that’s why they were so perfect for each other.”
In some ways, the two males in the movie reminded Harry of the two of them: an extrovert who wasn’t afraid of being himself, just like Louis. The other was more reserved, closed off, a bit like Harry. Who knew if Louis had noticed the similarity.
“You think? Do you really believe two people, so different from one another, can love each other in real life?” Louis asked, who seemed lost in thought.
Harry considered the question for a moment, but he already knew the answer. “Yes, I think so, especially in their case. Living life so differently can only- uhm. How can I say?” he hesitated, searching for the right words. “If two people love each other, if they’re willing to see the world through their partner’s eyes and share the view, then yeah. It’s like, on their own they just understand half the world, but together it can be a whole, because they are so different.” Harry thought briefly about what he said and laughed. “I don't think I explained myself very well.”
“No, I get it.”
There was a strange tone in Louis’ voice, one that Harry couldn’t understand. He sounded resigned, upset. Or maybe he was just sad about the movie.
“What do you think?” Harry asked, curious.
“I get what you said, and I believe it’s true or it should be. I just think that it's a very rare type of love.”
Harry, not knowing what to say, remained silent: if he opened his mouth, he would have blurted out what he felt for Louis, but it wasn’t the right time. Not yet.
“Let’s get some sleep,” Louis said suddenly and just then Harry realized that it was almost 2am.
Louis got up from the sofa and stretched. “I know you don't want me to tell you, but thank you.”
“Of course, Lou,” Harry smiled at him as he turned off his laptop, then added, “If you don't feel well tonight or if you need anything, my door’s open. Don’t hesitate to wake me up. Even if you can't sleep and want some company. Or if you’re thirsty or need to use the loo, just- you know, this is your home now.”
Louis rolled his eyes. “I’m not going to wake you up because I want company, Haz.”
Harry shrugged. “I don’t usually sleep a lot, you could find me awake already.”
“How come? Do you have insomnia?”
“I don't know, it’s always been this way. These last few days…” He left the sentence pending; it was useless to finish it, they both knew what he was talking about. “Goodnight, Lou.”
“Night, H.”
Hesitating only for a moment, Harry hugged Louis briefly before going to his room. As soon as the door was closed behind him, he released a long sigh and tilted his head against the solid surface. At this rate, he didn't know how long he could go before telling Louis everything. Asking Louis to live with him had been a spontaneous idea, mostly out of jealousy, but now it seemed like the worst and sweetest torture Harry could live through.