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“You do realize that if we’re buying three turkeys, we should have bought them at least a week before the day before Thanksgiving?” Namjoon sighed.
”But we couldn’t decide what size turkeys we wanted, so we had to research.” Taehyung argued.
Taehyung and Hoseok had decided to accompany Namjoon to the supermarket to pick up the turkeys the maknae line was supposed to get last week.
”Calm down, Namjoonie. I’m sure there’ll be some left.” Hoseok said.
Namjoon put a hand on the elder’s shoulder. “You’ve never been to the supermarket on Thanksgiving Eve.”
As they walked into the supermarket, it was not surprising to see it packed full of people.
Taehyung stared at everything and everyone as they walked towards the meat section. “Can we get this?” he pointed at everything sugary looking as they walked down the aisles.
”No.”
“What about that?”
”No.”
”What about me? Can I get that?”
”Hyung, not you too.”
At last, they got to the meat section, to Namjoon’s relief.
”Wait, we didn’t bring a shopping cart.” Hoseok pointed out.
Namjoon sighed. “Taehyung go to the front of the store-wait you can’t be unsupervised. Hoseok go with him.”
As the two left, he realized what a bad idea it was to send them both unsupervised.
“Come back in less than five!”
(It took half an hour for Taehyung and Hoseok to return)
- - -
Meanwhile, back at the dorms, Jin was having no better luck. Namjoon had left him and Yoongi with Jimin and Jungkook. The two maknae’s were fighting over who had to wipe down the table and who got to put the plates on the table.
”I’m older so I should do it!” Jimin argued.
”I’m taller.”
”What does that have to-“
”Jungkook, wipe down the table and Jimin put the plates down after.” Yoongi interjected.
As they had no turkey yet, Jin was in charge of stuffing and rolls while Yoongi did the mashed potatoes and pie.
Jimin and Jungkook returned to the kitchen when they were done setting the table.
“I’m hungry.” Jungkook complained.
”Get a small snack out of the refrigerator.” Jin said. “But get out of my kitchen after.”
After five minutes of Jungkook digging in the fridge, Jimin decided that he wanted a snack too, digging in the cabinets next to Yoongi’s head.
Jin’s vein popped out on his forehead. “How about you two go watch some tv?”
”Nah, that’s boring. Why would we do that?” Jimin asked.
Jin’s face was starting to turn red. “Can you at least stop making so much noise?”
”You’re no fun.” Jimin pouted. “Right, Kookie?”
Jungkook nodded.
”Kook, not you too.”
- - -
Back at the grocery store, Namjoon had run around the whole supermarket trying to find Taehyung and Hoseok.
Eventually, he had found them in the candy aisle, staring at the Sour Patch Kids.
”Do you think Namjoon will notice?” Tae whispered to Hoseok.
”No. We can do it.”
“Do what?” the man in question asked.
The two screamed, earning looks from passerby.
”What are you two trying to do?” Namjoon asked.
Taehyung shifted uncomfortably.
”Empty out your pockets.”
Tae turned his pockets out, wincing as four bags of Skittles fell out.
”Were you two trying to steal?” he exclaimed, panicking. What if they had been caught? That would have been the end of BTS.
”We’re literally millionaires. We can afford Skittles.”
”But then it’d show up on our credit cards and then you’d know we got candy.” Taehyung argued.
Namjoon sighed. Why did he get stuck with the job of watching Taehyung and Hoseok?
”Put them in the cart.”
”We never got the cart.” Hoseok stated.
”We’re all going to get it now.”
(They ended up pushing a man down for the last cart but no one saw, right?)
Finally, they got the last three turkeys. They only took two of them from other people’s carts, but no one would notice.
Of course, when they went to the register to go pay, the shortest line was thirty people deep.
Namjoon sighed. “Why must my life be difficult?”
- - -
At the dorms, Jin’s face was slowly growing redder by the minute. Jimin continued to make a mess of the kitchen and would not shut up about some video he watched.
”Oh! Also, who wants to watch my favorite movie tonight?” Jimin asked.
Jin lost it. “Jimin! Stop talking so much! And you’ve made such a big mess! You need to keep this kitchen clean! Go watch tv like a good kid! And the couch, it’s such a mess! Clean that too!”
He heard a click. He turned to his right to see Jungkook holding his phone taking video.
“Kook, did you just-“
”Sorry, Jin-Hyung. Jimin-Hyung was paying me to take video.”
”Did you plan to make me angry just for blackmail?” he glared at Jimin.
Jimin grinned. “It worked.”
”Get back here, Jimin-ah!”
The two ran around the dorms, Yoongi snickering from the kitchen.
- - -
“I give up this line is too long.” Namjoon cried. They had been on line for at least twenty minutes and only four people had payed so far. The person paying now was complaining about something.
”Don’t worry, Namjoonie, we only have to wait a little bit longer.” Hoseok reassured.
”But it’s already one o’clock and the turkeys are gonna take at least three hours.”
”We’ll just wait it out.”
Another twenty minutes passed and six people payed.
“There’s still twenty people behind us.” Tae stated, getting bored of standing.
“Are you sure we’ll make it, Hobi?” Namjoon asked, still very unsure.
“Of course.” Hoseok said with a smile that made him look more like he was about to commit a crime.
Three minutes later and Hoseok lost it. He pushed the people in front of them and threw the turkeys out of their cart.
”H-hyung?” Tae asked, scared.
”We’re going home.” Hoseok grinned evilly.
”Hyung’s gone crazy.” Tae said fearfully to Namjoon.
- - -
At last, Taehyung, Hoseok, and Namjoon returned to the dorms where they found Jimin laying facedown on the ground by the couch, Jungkook holding a phone to Jin’s face, Jin’s face very red, and Yoongi being the only sane one, cooking in the kitchen.
“I don’t want to cook the turkeys.” Jin announced. “Yoongi-ah, you do it.”
”No. Hoseok should.”
”No thanks. Jimin?”
”Fineeee.”
Yoongi, Jin, Hoseok, and Namjoon sat on the couch to rest from the maknae line’s antics.
Taehyung and Jimin went into the kitchen to cook and Jungkook ran off somewhere to do who knows what.
”Wait, what do we fill the turkey with?” Jimin asked.
Taehyung shrugged. “I don’t think we fill it. I think we cut it up and tie it back together with string.”
Jimin nodded. “Tae, you are so wise. Now hand me that knife.”
”Let’s turn the garbage disposal on so we can just throw the gunk out.” Tae pressed the button.
”Get the turkey pan out. I’m gonna dump the remains in.”
Of course, Jimin held the cutting board the wrong way and the turkey slid into the garbage disposal.
”No!”
The two watched in silence as the turkey bits were sliced into small pieces and sent into the garbage disposal.
”We still have two turkeys. We can do this.” Jimin said, trying to make himself feel better.
Taehyung nodded. “You cut, I’ll transfer the turkey after.
Jimin cut the turkey again and handed the cutting board to Taehyung.
As soon as he took it, he had underestimated the weight and dropped it on the floor.”
”Damn it, Tae!”
The two sighed.
“Do you think the seven of us could eat with one turkey?” Taehyung asked.
”I hope so. This is our last shot.”
Jimin cut the last turkey and they finally got it into the pan.
”Okay! Let’s look up a recipe now.” Jimin said.
”Shouldn’t we have done that in the first place?”
Jimin stayed silent.
- - -
“Oh. We weren’t supposed to cut the turkey up. We messed it all up.”
Jimin felt his soul leave his body. “What do we do now?”
Tae grabbed the pan with the turkey and threw it out the window. “Make a believable story.”
”So you’re getting everyone’s hopes up for turkey only to reveal that you don’t have it and then you’re gonna emotionally manipulate us to save ourselves?” Jungkook asked, coming into the kitchen.
”Kook, you have to help us!” Jimin cried. “Don’t tell anyone.”
Jungkook sighed. “One one condition.”
Taehyung and Jimin looked at each other and nodded. “We’re willing to hear you out.”
”You need to get me some more blackmail of Jin-Hyung.”
Tae grinned. “Done!”
When dinner rolled around, Jimin told everyone the turkey was in the oven warming so they could start dinner.
Jin’s stuffing and rolls were on the table and Yoongi’s mashed potatoes.
”Where’s the turkey?” Jin asked.
Jimin looked at Jungkook and nodded. The youngest took his phone out and set it to record.
”It ran away.”
”What?” Namjoon asked.
”It ran away.”
”So the turkey just got up and ran away?” Jin asked.
Jimin nodded. “That’s exactly what happened.”
Jin leaped out of his seat. “What did you do to the turkeys?”
Jimin flashed Taehyung the signal they came up with and Tae threw a spoonful of mashed potatoes at Jin’s head. It landed in his hair.
”Taehyung!”
”Food fight!”
- - -
When Sejin walked into the dorms the next morning, he was not expecting to be met with mashed potatoes on the walls, stuffing on the couches, and broken plates littering the floor.
”Everyone? Where are you?”
Namjoon walked over with a vacuum. “Taehyung started a food fight last night.”
Sejin sighed, not very surprised. “Is everyone alright?”
”Hoseok got hit in the head by a roll. He’s fine but still in shock.”
Sejin facepalmed. “Maybe you guys should have Thanksgiving with your families from now on.”