Archive of Our Own ^beta

Curled up in a mountain of sheets and duvets, Jun-Ho begins to stir awake. There isn't any sunlight streaming into the room to alert him, nor does the temperature change. Rather it was a mixture of his own body clock and the urge to use the bathroom. He valiantly clings to remnants of his sleep, the sheets are far too soft around his naked body, enveloping him a gentle embrace; however, the restlessness continues to grow until he couldn't ignore it any more.

With great reluctance and annoyance, Jun-Ho slowly peels away the covers surrounding him and pushes himself into a sitting position. The expansive bed is empty, save for himself; but to his left the mattress and sheets still hold the residual warmth of another body - a familiar scent clinging to the pillow and duvet. Plopping down once more, Jun-Ho gradually makes his way to the left and breathes deeply into the other sides’ pillow. The scent is comforting and familiar, and never fails to set his mind easy.

Although, a sharp kick within his stomach thought otherwise. 

Jun-Ho instinctively places a hand on his growing belly, rubbing slow circles on the area he felt those little feet nudge him so insistently - chuckling when he felt yet another flutter of kicks against his palm. The child would always be so active when he woke up or moved around much. Always preferring if their mother wasn't exerting themself and chose to remain in bed instead. 

"So much like your Appa." Jun-Ho muses out aloud, patting his stomach. However, a well placed kick to his bladder reminded him as to why he woke up in the first place.

'Brat.' He grouched mentally, untangling from the plethora of sheets and finally sitting on the edge of the bed. 

He was quite far along in his pregnancy, and the weight of his belly pushed down on his bladder. Using the strength of his upper body, Jun-Ho slowly pushed himself onto his feet. He still hadn't fully grasped his new centre of gravity; hence taking a minute to find his balance. Jun-Ho could feel the muted ache build once more in his feet and back; it never quite left unless he was lying in bed or seated with his feet up. He couldn't imagine that he still had more time to go - that he still had room to grow bigger. 

'Obviously a child of his would be a titan.' He snarked, carefully making his way to the washroom to relieve himself. 

Fortunately the trip wasn't a long one, but it tired him nonetheless. With great care, Jun-Ho lowered himself to the seat (he long since gave up on standing, for reaching across his pregnant belly was now impossible), and sighed as the pressure building within him was released. It terrified him that in the weeks to come, his mobility and stamina would be further restricted. How basic everyday things were a challenge to do or complete. He already struggled standing up from chairs that were slightly too low. 

But this train of thought was stopped short by a flurry of nudges - as if the child was reproaching him for his negative line of thinking.

Jun-Ho smiled affectionately, and stroked his belly. A silent thank you to the babe for pulling him away and comforting him.

"Taking over your Appa's roles already?" He asked rhetorically, cleaning himself and carefully making his way to the sink. 

Washing and drying his hands, Jun-Ho finally looks into the mirror. 

He almost doesn't recognise himself.

Apart from the obvious heavily pregnant belly taking up most of his image, his hairstyle was the only thing that remained unchanged. His body has lost all muscle definition over the past couple of months, softening his once sharp features. Although he has gained some weight, the majority of it was around his hips and thighs; adding more curves. He could practically see his chest swell with each passing day. Even though he didn't require expressing just yet, the building pressure and increasing sensitivity implied it wouldn't be too far away.

Jun-Ho's eyes then settle on the multiple kiss marks littered across his skin, especially the healing bite mark at the base of his neck. It would have healed a long time ago, had a certain someone chosen not to aggravate it every other day. Jun-Ho wouldn't be surprised if the mark scarred - he figured that it was the plan after all.

"Hyung…" He whispered, tracing around abused flesh. 

His brother was an incredibly possessive and protective man. 

The child growing in his belly was proof of that. In-Ho’s daily onslaught on his body only eased after the confirmation of his pregnancy. Partially due to not wanting to risk a miscarriage; but also due to the man deeming Jun-Ho sufficiently claimed by him. However, it wasn't enough to satisfy In-Ho. All the marks littered across his body, the bite on his neck and his current location told Jun-Ho his brother still didn't believe in his choices or promises. 

Eyeing the bullet wound on his shoulder, Jun-Ho recalled the first time he woke up in this room. 

All he could feel was the dull throbbing in his shoulder when he finally came to. Initially he tried to reach across, to touch the source of the pain. However, he couldn't summon the strength to do so - even breathing seemed to be a laborious task. His memory was hazy and his mind seemed to be filled with water, but through sheer willpower alone Jun-Ho cracked open his eyes.

A familiar ceiling greeted him.

He was back in the Front Man’s room, and carefully tucked into the plush bed. The lack of clothing was a mild concern, but the luxurious sheets surrounding him felt incredibly soft against his skin.

"You're awake," a voice to the left of him called his attention and with great difficulty Jun-Ho turned his head.

In-Ho. Hyung. 

In a flash the memories flood back into him and Jun-Ho visibly flinches at the information overload. His heart rate skyrockets and Jun-Ho could do anything else besides crying. He couldn't process the situation any other way nor could he contain the influx of emotions sweeping across.

The shock from discovery.

The pain from betrayal.

The guilt from shooting.

But there was also relief... Relief that his hyung is alive. 

"Even after all this time," In-Ho says, reaching out to brush away the tears streaming down Jun-Ho's face, "You are still a cry baby, Dongsaeng." 

His brother's hand is soft and warm, and the action is ever so gentle and affectionate - just like it was back then, when they were younger. If not for the stabbing pain in his shoulder, Jun-Ho would have forgotten that this was the exact same hand that shot him.

Spotting the bandages on In-Ho's shoulder, his mind chided, it wasn't as if he hadn’t pulled a trigger either. 

Purely on instinct, Jun-Ho leans into the touch and nuzzles the palm on his face. He could feel In-Ho falter and his breath hitch in surprise, but his brother quickly recovers - this time firmer and more confident. It wasn't rocket science to figure out In-Ho had expected him to shy away from the touch… Much as it was a logical deduction, it rattled Jun-Ho to the core. 

His entire life was spent seeking out his brother's touch, and after weeks of In-Ho's disappearance he finally found him. Jun-Ho never could stay away, not back then - and definitely not now. 

Jun-Ho tries to summon his strength to ask the many questions in his mind. Why did In-Ho return to the games? Why is he the Front Man? Why is he doing this? 

But most of all, why did he leave him behind? 

In-Ho must have seen a shift in his expression or felt his restlessness, for the man simply raked his fingers through Jun-Ho's hair as he spoke, "Rest and recover, we'll talk about this when you are better." 

Despite the gravity of the situation, the familiar comforting action of his childhood lulled Jun-Ho back to sleep.

Ever since then, Jun-Ho had never set foot beyond the door leading out of the room. At times he did feel as though he were a caged bird; but with his brother by his side, those bars became a nest where he never wanted to leave. However no amount of talking could assure his brother if given the chance he wouldn't fly away. 

The lack of trust did hurt Jun-Ho, but he couldn't fault his brother for thinking in such a way. After all he did refuse In-Ho when his brother reached out to him at the cliffside. To this day, it was Jun-Ho’s biggest regret. At the time the shock of the revelation and the implication his brother was responsible for all those deaths made him shake his head. It was a mental whiplash to discover his ever so moralistic, kind, straight-laced brother acted so… inhuman. 

It still unsettled him, and Jun-Ho sighed once more at his reflection before leaving the bathroom.  

X.

In-Ho makes his way back to his suite after the morning assembly. This year's games would be held in the coming few months and the amount of preparation and planning never decreased. More so than the actual game designs, procurement of clothing and equipment; the recruitment of potential players was the most stressful aspect. The recruiters only had a few weeks to enlist those on their lists, and even then the call back ratio was highly unfavourable. 

Thankfully, the majority of the commander staff was well trained and extremely familiar with all the procedures to keep the game's schedule on track. Besides, it was the first time he would be conducting the game as the Host and not the Front Man. 

Approaching the front door to his suite, In-Ho carefully opens it to allow himself inside (to not disturb the occupant inside if they were asleep). He makes his way quietly down the corridor and smiles underneath his mask at the scene playing out before him.

Jun-Ho must have woken up not too long ago gauging by the state of his hair. Although In-Ho had bought his baby brother some maternity wear, Jun-Ho still chose to live solely in his shirts. Due to his quiet entry, his brother remained blissfully ignorant of his arrival; allowing In-Ho to lean against the wall of the corridor and observe his brother. He watches Jun-Ho work cautiously around the kitchenette to make a cup of tea, his maternal gait slow and careful. He could see the pregnancy was taking a toll on his brother's body, but the pits of In-Ho's stomach curdled with primal satisfaction at the sight of his seed growing within Jun-Ho's slight fame.

It was times like this that made In-Ho feel as if it was a fever dream.

A dream that In-Ho couldn’t place when it started. 

Maybe from the day when he first met his brother, back when he was only a sixteen year old teenager. However, back then those dreams and feelings were innocent and pure; not this ugly animalistic mess it currently was. After all this time, In-Ho could still clearly remember that day - visiting his mother in the hospital and the moment they placed Jun-Ho in his arms. The baby felt heavy and light at the same time, he couldn’t tell if he was holding his brother too tightly or too loosely - scared to crush him or drop him. 

When the baby opened his eyes and locked eyes with him, In-Ho felt his heart clench… It was love at first sight. 

Never before had he felt such emotion towards anyone. Perhaps when he was a child, he could have loved his parents; but now a cold distance separated them. He couldn’t care less if they lived or died - but Jun-Ho was different. The smile and subsequent giggle Jun-Ho gave him all those years ago were engraved into In-Ho’s soul. Their mother and father never shared a single drop of affection with him. All his life In-Ho only recalled a cold empty house; bleak and silent. There wasn’t any anger, no yelling or fighting within the walls of their home; all their conversations were clinical and business-like.

In-Ho couldn’t even recall a single happy memory nor a sad one. There was nothing… which resulted in him feeling nothing.

Until Jun-Ho came into his life. 

He could still remember the strength of Jun-Ho’s grip, when he reached out with his tiny fist to grab In-Ho’s finger. 

That was when In-Ho vowed to protect his brother, keep him well and happy till the end of time.

A vow he broke on that cliff. 

From the moment he learned that it was his brother who had infiltrated the island, In-Ho’s non-existent emotions surged forward and overwhelmed him. He was eternally grateful for the Front Man’s uniform - hiding his expression and body language from his subordinates. The corpse’s shirt had been pulled up, exposing the torso and the missing scar. In-Ho realistically knew his brother was still on the island, but the scheduled games and arrival of the VIPs prevented him from looking deeper into it. He had hoped Jun-Ho would behave himself until the games were all over. 

But, unfortunately, he didn’t - not that In-Ho could fault his brother, even now the thought of his brother being touched by that VIP made his blood boil. 

(The Host had sent a questioning look his way at the report, but eventually waved his hand as a sign to dismiss the complaint. In a sense the old man’s impending death made him less tolerant towards the whining of the VIPs. Despite his mask of indifference, In-Ho took deep pleasure in the removal of VIP six from their invitee’s list. There were always more people to replace and sponsor the games.)

However, in spite of all those arrangements, convincing Jun-Ho to join him was another matter. 

“If you drop your gun right now,” In-Ho began slowly walking towards his brother, “and hand over the phone, I might let you live.”

“Stop right there!” Ju-ho yelled, gun now pointed at him. 

In-Ho’s body screamed to reach out to soothe his brother. The past few days of his undercover mission have made Jun-Ho skittish and paranoid. In-Ho could see the exhaustion clinging to every part of his brother’s face and body; he wanted nothing more than to take Jun-Ho into his arms and calm him. He couldn’t care less about the gun, and he rattles the information regarding the final bullet in the chamber. In-Ho watches his brother falter at his words - after all only those attached to the force have this kind of knowledge. 

“Give up,” In-Ho says before taking two steps towards his cornered brother.

“I warned you,” Jun-Ho replies, even more antsy at In-Ho's steady approach. “Take another step -”

In-Ho promptly ignores him and takes the shot to the shoulder. 

The pain of the bullet ripping into the flesh of his shoulder is overwhelming, but In-Ho has suffered much greater injuries. Staggering and digging his feet onto the ground, he raises his arm - a silent command to his men to stand their ground. They immediately follow through, but the tension doesn't ease. In a sense he is proud of his men; they were hand picked by him to be his personal team. Which was why he called them to handle the matter with his brother (they knew how to keep their mouths shut, even to the Host).

Breathing through the pain, In-Ho whispers to his brother, “This is over… Now come with me.” 

He watches Jun-Ho assess his position and shuffle back to the ledge. In-Ho’s heart twists at his actions, the thought of his brother trying to distance himself from him.

“Do as I say,” In-Ho urges once more, shifting closer, “or you die.”

His feeling and emotions must have seeped past the voice modulator of the mask, for Jun-Ho hesitantly lowered his weapon. 

“Who the hell...” he asks, uncertain and confused, “are you?”

Realising there isn’t any other choice, In-ho slowly lowers the hood of his jacket. The rules he fervently followed and lived by during the course of the games were now nothing. He knew from their current position, only Jun-Ho would be able to see his face (as his entire team was standing a few feet behind him). Unclipping the mask, In-Ho took a deep breath to calm himself as he peeled it away.

He could see the exact moment Jun-Ho realised the Front Man was his brother. 

With a quivering lip and a trembling voice, his little brother whispers brokenly, “Hyung...”

That word cut’s deeply into In-Ho’s blackened soul. He could see his image of a righteous gentile brother being shattered right before him in Jun-Ho’s eyes. There was no going back in their relationship; In-Ho felt no shame in his involvement in the games, but that look of betrayal in his brother’s eyes shook him. Perhaps if he could explain all of this, Jun-Ho would be willing to remain by his side.      

“Let’s go,” In-Ho says softly, reaching out with his hand, “Let’s go together.”

Jun-Ho was clearly still in shock as he bewilderedly looked down at his outstretched hand. The searing pain in his shoulder is nothing, compared to the clenching of his heart when Jun-Ho shakes his head in reply. He could see the hesitation and uncertainty mixed into the response, and it is cold comfort to know he wasn’t rejected completely.  

But it doesn’t make it easier to point his gun at his baby brother.

“Hyung...” Jun-Ho repeats still in shock, and In-Ho feels his resolve waver, “Hyungnim, why?...”

The respectful address provided a small ray of hope that their relationship wasn’t over. That killing Jun-Ho wasn’t the only way to save him from this situation. That In-Ho still had a chance to keep his brother by his side; despite Jun-Ho knowing the truth. It was a risky gamble, but In-Ho was willing to wager anything to keep his brother alive. Besides, he should take into account the two bodies Jun-ho left behind on his mission to find him. Perhaps the odds weren’t completely against his favour.  

Making his decision, In-Ho pulls the trigger. 

His shoulder aches at the sight of the bullet hitting Jun-Ho’s shoulder, and In-Ho watches impassively as his brother's body falls over the edge, never breaking their eye contact. Hearing the splash, In-Ho slowly walks over and watches the bubbles rise from the water. He gives a few moments to compose himself, and subsequently replaces his mask. 

“Retrieve him and bring him to my room,” was all he said to the head of his team. 

“Yes, Sir.”

“Are you going to keep standing there, or are you going to help me?” A familiar voice pulls him away from that memory.

Blinking rapidly to refocus his mind, In-Ho lets out a small smile at the present scene. Whilst he was walking down memory lane, Jun-Ho had chosen to sit down on one of the living area armchairs; in order to enjoy his morning cup of tea. Unfortunately the seat was a few inches too low, making his brother incapable of standing up once more.

‘His must have grown over the past week,’ In-Ho thought, for that chair wasn’t a problem two weeks ago. 

In a few short strides, In-Ho crosses the room and makes his way towards his seated brother. No matter how long it had been, In-Ho has yet to grow tired of his brother (he had an inkling that he never will). Up close, he admired how beautiful Jun-Ho had become these past few months. Not that his brother was ever unattractive in his eyes - but the glow of pregnancy was something else. Although In-Ho knew how exhausting carrying the child was; the look of an expecting mother suited Jun-Ho very much. 

After being locked up for months, Jun-Ho’s skin had lightened. Due to the lack of his regular police training, all his angular features had all softened; losing their hard edge. Dressed only in his shirt, In-Ho allowed his eyes to take in the miles of Jun-Ho’s legs. He always thought his brother’s slim toned legs were one of his key features; until pregnancy filled his thighs - now they were In-Ho’s favourite (especially when they were either wrapped around his waist or his face was between them.).  

When did it all change? In-Ho often pondered. He knew his current feelings for his brother were not always as such. 

He distinctly recalls a much simpler time, when they were younger where his feelings were nothing more than brotherly affection. 

‘When Jun-Ho was discovered to be a carrier,’ his mind helpfully supplies. 

And In-Ho couldn’t help but agree.

Their relationship was unusually close from the start. However, In-Ho never thought otherwise. Much like his upbringing, their parents did the bare minimum to keep the baby alive. It was obvious from the start, Jun-Ho’s conception was an accident, and his subsequent treatment following his birth only confirmed that particular narrative. Hence, much of the familial bonding, affection and comfort came from In-Ho. Even though In-Ho ended up being responsible for Jun-Ho’s development; he found himself becoming dependent on his brother's presence to feel grounded.

Prior to Jun-Ho’s birth, In-Ho felt no emotion. Although he mimicked expressions and calculated reactions with his schoolmates; none of it was real. At home no one smiled, or offered a kind word. Everyone ignored each other and went about their day, without any crossover. That all changed since Jun-Ho’s arrival. Now he had someone who’d greet him every morning, smile at him, celebrate his achievements, embrace him, seek him out and curl up beside him as they slept. This behaviour was acceptable when Jun-Ho was younger, but nothing changed as the years went by. 

Rather, their relationship only became more interdependent. More interwoven. More possessive. 

He could see the occasional blank look their mother sent their way, but her apathy towards them made her hold her tongue. She wasn’t a mother before, she had the self-awareness to not start being one now. 

It had not been a pleasant thought, but the future of Jun-Ho finding someone apart from him was something he was working towards accepting. In-Ho had seen how well his brother got along with children, and unlike him, Jun-Ho had the emotional stability to raise children in a healthy loving way. Although they never spoke about it, In-Ho could see his brother gravitate towards things that held themes of a traditional happy family. From the books he read, the scenes in dramas he spoke about and friends he made. In-Ho knew he couldn’t give his brother that dream and for that he was willing to let Jun-Ho go.

In-Ho would have been happy simply remaining as Jun-Ho’s elder brother who would always look out for him. 

Until a test came back, confirming Jun-Ho’s status as a carrier.

It was on the blood test taken to find out In-Ho’s compatibility as a kidney donor. The result was tucked away among the other medical jargon, but In-Ho’s eyes zeroed in on it. A few seconds later, so did Jun-Ho’s. He recalled comforting his brother that he still loved him despite his different biology (carriers were rare and ostracized within their country); but In-Ho’s mind was more focused on what it meant for their relationship.

From the darkest corner of his mind he heard the sweet whispers of a voice telling him he could now give Jun-Ho his dream of having a happy family with many children. That he could be more than a brother. That he could be closer.

In-Ho remembers suppressing that voice and focusing on the topic of transplanting his kidney, but he felt something shift within him from that day onwards.

Perhaps he was projecting - but In-Ho felt something shift in their relationship as well. 

“What are you thinking so deeply about?” Jun-Ho’s voice cuts through his thoughts once more.

In-Ho smiles ambiguously at his brother’s curious expression before replying, “About you... How utterly breathtaking you look right now.”

Jun-Ho flushes at the compliment as he looks away, muttering under his breath, “I don’t know what you find so breathtaking about a whale apart from me being constantly out of breath.”

There isn’t any heat in his tone, and In-Ho chuckles affectionately at the comeback. Even with the additional weight of the babe, he effortlessly scoops up his brother into his arms and carries him back to the bedroom - smirking at the surprised yelp in response. Jun-Ho lightly hits his chest; but leans into his embrace, wrapping his arms around In-Ho’s neck automatically. It had become so ingrained in their routine, for In-Ho to carry his brother anywhere.   

“You should be resting,” He says, and Jun-Ho lets out an exasperated sigh. 

“I’m bored just staying in bed,” his brother mumbles, resting his head on In-Ho’s shoulder and nuzzling his neck. 

Without missing a beat, In-Ho purrs out suggestively, “Perhaps I could do something about that.”

The heat flooding into Jun-Ho’s gaze as he looks up at In-Ho, tells the older man his proposal was welcomed. Straining his neck a little, In-Ho catches his brother’s lower lip in a tender kiss. He hears Jun-Ho release a soft moan, parting his lips to allow In-Ho’s tongue to dive in. Drinking in the taste of his brother, In-Ho idly contemplates their relationship.

In no way is it stable or healthy, but over the past few months he has seen improvement.

With time, they’ll arrive at something normal.

X.

From his time in captivity, Jun-Ho learns one thing. 

Don’t ask unnecessary questions. 

Even if he did, no one would answer them. He had tried to befriend the workers who cleaned the room, but none of them responded to his questions. It does drive him up a wall, the lack of human interaction and fresh air. The tiny balcony is his only reprieve, but it offers no view apart from the endless sea and sky (it's better than nothing, he tells himself). He was never deprived of any entertainment; he had a feeling his Internet usage was heavily monitored, but never restricted - Jun-Ho wasn't stupid to use his original social media accounts or post anything identifying.

Online interaction did stave off the loneliness, but there were times he craved an actual conversation. The only other person who had spoken to him apart from his brother, was the doctor who is in charge of monitoring his baby’s development. 

Jun-Ho flinched as the child in his belly kicked his lungs, trying to stop the babe with a light petting on his taut skin. He sees In-Ho glance at him worriedly, and he sends a reassuring smile in response. 

No matter how frustrating the entire situation was, Jun-Ho never rebelled against his brother. 

After all, he chose to stay. 

Once more he came too, and this time waking up wasn’t as hard as it was last time. His shoulder still hurts, but the pain has subsided - either his mind has become accustomed to the pain or he has been given some medication. Regardless, Jun-ho is grateful. His throat is parched, and his mouth is dry. No amount of swallowing produces any saliva, so he turns his head to spot any liquid nearby. Thankfully, there is an already filled glass of water on his bedside. With great difficulty, he eventually finds himself in a sitting position and reaches out for the glass. Although his thirst is overwhelming, Jun-Ho hesitates. 

“It’s safe to drink,” a voice says and Jun-Ho looks towards the speaker.

He sees his brother in the doorway with a tray of food. He keeps his eyes on In-Ho’s approaching figure. It’s nothing fancy, a simple congee and some more water. Jun-Ho spots two white tablets on a small saucer in the corner, but he recognises them - painkillers. In-Ho sets the tray down on the table near the bed and picks up the glass. He takes a long sip from the water and holds out the glass towards Jun-Ho. 

He allows his brother to feed him the refreshing liquid, and doesn’t stop until the glass is empty. In-Ho returns the glass to the bedside table, and then places the tray of food on Jun-Ho’s lap.

“Eat,” In-Ho instructs, “you need to regain your strength as you rest.”

It’s almost nostalgic how familiar this scene was. How many times before did In-Ho nurse him when he fell ill during his childhood. 

Jun-Ho stares at his brother, but In-Ho’s face remains blank and expressionless. More than the Front Man’s mask, Jun-Ho hates this look. Although he is aware of his brother’s lack of emotions and familiar with his impassive face; In-Ho had never directed it at Jun-Ho. No matter how small his smile was or subtle his annoyance, there was always something Jun-Ho could pick out when his brother was with him. It was what made Jun-Ho feel special, that he was someone important to his older brother - the absence of that made him feel as if he were just another person on the street, meant to be forgotten and ignored. 

Every fiber of his being abhors that thought.

Since he could remember, Jun-Ho recalls how callous and cold their parents were. Compared with his schoolmates and friends, he could see they weren’t a normal family. However, the sadness of not having the typical happy interactions with his mother or father was never there. He never yearned for his parent’s affection, because he always had In-Ho lavishing him with love and attention. It didn’t matter if his parents ‘forgot’ to attend any parent-teacher meetings, school prize giving ceremonies or celebrate his birthday and other key milestones. 

In-Ho was always there. 

Brushing away tears of sadness, comforting him when he fails, cheering for him during competitions, celebrating his achievements.

In-Ho was there for him when passed the top of his class. In-Ho was there when he was diagnosed with early onset kidney failure. He was also there when the results came in that he was a carrier - comforting him that he wouldn’t love Jun-Ho any less than he did before. Only to focus more on the more pressing news, that they were a suitable match.

It wasn’t a question for him to give his kidney, only how much the procedure would cost him for his brother. Jun-Ho visibly balked at the number, but In-Ho simply agreed and asked for the earliest available date. Outside the hospital, Jun-Ho tried to reason that they didn’t have the money; due to their parents' terrible credit history, many financial institutions refused to grant them a loan. Neither were they willing to get loan sharks involved. However, In-Ho simply smiled and said he was called in for a special job that would pay for the surgery. At the time Jun-Ho simply accepted the answer assuming it was one of those high-risk bodyguard assignments he would receive from time to time.

Now he knew, it was money from this game that paid for his surgery. 

He always thought In-Ho had changed after that particular time, especially how he clung on to Jun-Ho’s frame when he returned. Jun-Ho assumed it was a rough assignment, but now he knew that his brother was dealing with the trauma and guilt of his win. Knowing how driven his brother was, Jun-Ho wouldn’t put it past In-Ho to actively kill other contestants to secure his place.

Strangely, that revelation doesn’t deter Jun-Ho from his love towards his brother, instead it strengthens it. Jun-Ho hadn’t been completely blameless this entire time. He could have left much earlier with the evidence he had, he could have returned with the police and shut the operation down and saved the lives of remaining players. However, he chose to prioritise the search for his brother and left two bodies in its wake. In a sense, they are similar in how they choose to act and think.

They were brothers, in the end.

Jun-Ho curls his fingers around the spoon, and with a trembling hand he feeds himself the congee. 

Even the taste is the same.

Neither of them exchanged any words, something Jun-Ho was grateful for as it gave him time to think.

As soon as he emptied the bowl and took the painkillers with some water, In-Ho cleared the tray. Even after his brother returns to his seat by his bedside, they still remain in silence. 

After what feels like an eternity, Jun-Ho finally speaks up, “I don’t blame you for joining the game.” His hand finds its way to his old surgery scar, he allows a brief moment of silence before continuing, “But I don’t know why you returned to the game.”

In-Ho contemplates his words, and Jun-Ho sees a flicker of something flash across those dead eyes. “The game changed me,” is his only response, but it tells Jun-Ho many things.

No one could walk away from these games unscathed - even the winners. It was a miracle In-Ho was still sane after all he had been through. Jun-Ho had a feeling many of the other players who weren’t mentally strong enough would have taken their lives after being consumed with survivor’s guilt. Jun-Ho’s pending surgery and recovery afterwards could have been the sole reason his brother kept himself together. However it didn’t explain In-Ho’s return to the game.

His question must have shown on his face, for In-Ho says, “After the games, returning to a normal life was impossible.” Jun-Ho watches In-Ho drop his gaze to his own hands, as if there was something on them, “I no longer felt I had the right to stay by your side. No matter how many times I wash them, I still feel the blood on my hands - I couldn’t bear to touch you with them. In fear of dirtying you.”

Jun-Ho feels the pressure build in his chest, as he chokes down the emotion welling in his throat. He had noticed In-Ho pulling away from him after he recovered, and at the time that growing distance broke him. Jun-Ho tried to find out the reason; was it a woman? (Jealousy tore through him at the possibility of a broken childhood promise In-Ho made with him about staying together till they died). No matter how much he looked, Jun-Ho couldn’t find a reason - only reluctantly accepting it, in hopes In-Ho would change his mind.

Despite the distance, they still maintained contact - which was why In-Ho’s weeks of radio silence alerted him to his disappearance. No matter how much In-Ho put between them, he would never leave Jun-Ho’s texts unread or calls unanswered. 

“You could never dirty me,” Jun-Ho whispers back, eyes wet with unshed tears. His brother had done so much for him, the kidney in his body was irrefutable proof of how much In-Ho had sacrificed for him. How could he think Jun-Ho would push him away after all of that? Sure, at the cliff he had refused his brother’s hand due to the amount of shock at the revelation. But how could he think that Jun-Ho wouldn’t love him anymore? That’s when it hits him; despite all those affectionate touches and embraces they’d traded over the years - neither of them voiced their true feelings.

Jun-Ho reached out with his uninjured arm, and placed his hand in his brother’s; the one that had been extended to him earlier on the cliff. 

This causes In-Ho to immediately lift his gaze and lock in with Jun-Ho’s.  

He could see the emotion begin to return to his brother’s face and Jun-Ho lets out a breath of relief. He couldn’t bear the thought of his brother shutting himself away from him. 

Squeezing In-Ho’s hand with whatever strength he had left, Jun-Ho summoned the courage to confess, “I love you, Hyung… I will always love you, back then and even now - even after all of this.”

Jun-Ho spots something flash across his brother’s face. It’s a mixture of surprise and affection before it fades into disappointment. He feels his heart race and anxiety flood his system. Why was In-Ho disappointed? What did he say wrong? How could he fix this? Jun-Ho mentally scrambled to find another way to rectify the situation; for he knew he wouldn’t get another chance. 

However In-Ho cuts him off before he could say anything, “Thank you, but I no longer love you the way I used to.”

Jun-Ho could practically feel his heart being torn to shreds at those words. He would much rather have been shot once more and left to drown in the sea than hear those words. Jun-Ho lets out a choked back sob, and attempted to pull his hand away from In-Ho’s. However, this time his brother’s firm grip prevents him from doing so.

Soon he finds another on his face, and in his confusion Jun-Ho looks back at his brother; who is now watching him intently. 

“Allow me to explain,” In-Ho’s voice remains steady but he could pick out the slight strain in his brother’s tone. “I no longer love you as a brother,” and with that a thumb brushes his lower lip and his brother’s eyes flicker downwards.

Oh. 

Jun-Ho never considered that as a reason. 

To be fair, he never looked closely into his relationship with his brother before either. Jun-Ho knew their relationship wasn’t normal - his friends in school had often joked about his brother complex, and his work colleagues would shoot him strange looks if he accidentally shared too many details on how affectionate they were. Neither In-Ho or he dated anyone; he had no reason to seek anyone out when he had his brother by his side. Even during the years they’d grown apart, Jun-Ho always found himself comparing anyone who had shown interest in him to his brother. 

(They all fell short.)

Now that he thought about it, the jealousy he felt at the thought In-Ho could have been dating someone could only be explained by his feelings. He had initially dismissed it as being an overly attached brother. However, the more he thought about it - Jun-Ho hated that idea with every fiber of his being. He couldn’t stand the thought of someone else coming in and taking up his spot beside his brother; to take a step back and allow some stranger to have In-Ho unconditional love and affection.             

He still isn’t sure if his love for his brother is familial or romantic, it's a mixture of the two for sure; regardless, he does know he isn’t letting his brother go for something trivial such as that.

Leaning into In-Ho's palm, with eyes half lidded, Jun-Ho doesn’t look away as he responds shyly, “I don’t mind that.”

This time he could see the shock of his answer, replace his brother’s blank face and stay there.  

“I don’t think you understand what I am saying,” In-Ho whispers in disbelief. 

Jun-Ho simply nuzzles his brother’s palm and presses a soft kiss to the thumb on his lips, “I think I do,” he retorts. The romantic gesture feels foreign to him, but not uncomfortable. It’s something new, but Jun-Ho could tell it was only a matter of time before it became normal. 

“You won’t be able to leave,” In-Ho warns him, tone wavering. Jun-Ho can see his brother’s mask begin to crack and his resolve starts to crumble.

“That’s the plan,” Jun-Ho smiles softly at his brother, and instinctively closes his eyes when he sees In-Ho lean forward.

Feeling the soft press of his brother’s lips against his, Jun-Ho thinks to himself, ‘This isn’t all that bad.’

Jun-Ho touches his lips at the memory of their first kiss. 

It was surprisingly soft and sweet, not that Jun-Ho imagined it to be anything otherwise. He had real no expectations on how it should have gone. However, gentleness wasn’t one of them. Maybe it was the injuries they both suffered or the emotional and mental exhaustion from the conversation that took place prior, that made their first kiss almost fleeting. No matter how stoic and closed off his brother had been earlier, Jun-Ho felt absolutely cherished in that kiss.

The heartache caused by nearly misunderstanding In-Ho’s response to his confession, soothed into the distance as all those shattered pieces flew back into form. The firm grip on his hand and face grounded Jun-Ho - reminding him that it was his brother who was beside him and not a dream. He no longer was chasing after a shadow or ghost, In-Ho was real and he wanted Jun-Ho to stay beside him. Jun-Ho recalled crying out in relief once they had parted, because he could sense it was a promise… rather a seal to a promise.

A promise to never leave each other.  

He could now laugh at the memory of In-Ho’s flustered expression in response to his outburst; but at the time Jun-Ho merely threw himself into his brother’s arms. Neither of them saying anything, only comforting each other with their presence (like how they used to do when they were younger).   

Jun-Ho always knew his brother was a man of few words or expressions; preferring to communicate through his actions than his speech. This was the reason Jun-Ho stayed plastered to his brother’s side, always looking into every little gesture In-Ho made. The stray hand was always around his waist as they stood side by side, the raking of his fingers through Jun-Ho’s hair and the causal pressing against him when they sat on the couch or slept in bed. There was never a moment In-Ho was not touching him. At times, Jun-Ho wondered as to why his brother was this touch starved. Apart from the close skinship they shared in his childhood, he hadn’t seen In-Ho seek out physical companionship from anyone else; instead his brother intentionally avoided it. 

However, Jun-Ho soon realised it wasn’t so much the desire to touch him; rather In-Ho’s uncertainty and lack of trust that he would stay. 

The imprisonment in the room was indicative of that belief. 

Which was a valid concern. 

Even now, Jun-Ho still couldn’t accept his brother’s role in these games. His moralistic and just side despised every little thing about it. He wanted nothing more than to shut it down and put a stop to the operation; but that would mean having to step away from In-Ho’s side. The internal conflict never really settled, and it was an incredibly bitter pill to swallow; when he finally made his decision.  

To silence his conscience, and look away. 

To ignore.

In-Ho must have picked up on his loathing towards the game; but never tried to justify his actions or his involvement - never trying to involve Jun-Ho in the process either. Instead his brother accepts his feelings towards the organisation and accommodates it, by always removing his mask before entering the room - allowing Jun-Ho to mentally separate his brother from the death games. It wasn’t much, but it definitely helped. 

They never spoke about the games either. In-Ho never spoke about his work when he entered the room and neither did Jun-Ho ask. He always felt the less he knew the better.

Like now.

For the first time since he was rescued after being shot, Jun-Ho was guided out of the room onto a yacht and then into a car once they landed on the mainland. In-Ho doesn't offer any explanation when he informs Jun-Ho of the trip, but he could tell his brother wasn't fond of the idea - leading him to believe it came from someone above his brother. Despite curious questions of who they were, Jun-Ho held his tongue and agreed. 

But he did request to be able to walk between modes of transport. Yes, the weight of babe would exhaust him quicker; but he wanted to savour his journey outside the room he'd come to know over the past year. Jun-Ho hadn't expected his brother to keep him in that room for that long. He knew the imprisonment was due to insecurity, and Jun-Ho tried to reassure his brother of his promise to stay. However, building trust and confidence wasn't an easy process. 

He at least expected his brother to relax when his pregnancy was confirmed. Now that In-Ho's child was in his belly, he could ease the restrictions and believe the fervent promises Jun-Ho repeated every night about not leaving him. Instead, his brother became more restrictive and protective. It was sweet at first seeing In-Ho being so captivated with his growing belly, speaking to the child when he thought Jun-Ho was asleep or placing a protective hand over it as they slept. However, it soon became too much for an already suffocating situation. 

In a sense, he was glad the games were coming up; for it distracted In-Ho enough to give Jun-Ho some breathing space. He didn't dare to tell In-Ho to back off, as their relationship still felt fragile and his brother would have definitely taken it the wrong way. 

Glancing down at his stomach, Jun-Ho pondered about his pregnancy. According to the doctor he was due anytime soon. Earlier this week his belly had dropped and breathing had become a lot easier. Jun-Ho wondered how his brother would handle the arrival of the child. After the initial few years, they couldn't keep the child locked in the suite. It wasn't a conversation Jun-Ho was willing to have, but a necessary one. 

Leaning against the leather seat cushion of the car, Jun-Ho peered out of the window. It was strange seeing other people, and a different environment. Some of the streets seemed familiar and foreign at the same time. He recalled various landmarks and could place others. However, there wasn't any yearning to join those people on the street. 

He did want to walk around, but only if In-Ho was there with his arm around Jun-Ho’s waist. 

"Do you miss it?" His brother's voice asks.

Jun-Ho doesn't take his eyes off the street as he answers, "Not really, just wish we could do that." Pointing to a couple, clearly inebriated. The mood is jolly between the two, it had to be with all the decor that reminded Jun-Ho that it was Christmas Eve.

In-Ho lets out a noncommittal hum in response; but shifts himself closer to Jun-Ho, placing a warm palm on his knee. Joining him in observing the world outside.

Jun-Ho isn't naive to think his brother is taking him somewhere romantic to celebrate Christmas. They grew up in a non religious household and neither of them believed in a higher power. Not to mention their attire wasn't something that could be considered as fancy. In-Ho was in more or less something similar to his frontman uniform minus the trench coat. Whilst he was in expensive looking loungewear. 

They pull up to an office building and In-Ho helps him out of the car. The walk to the elevator is slow but In-Ho doesn't seem to mind the tortoise pace Jun-Ho had set. It was strange to see no other numbered buttons apart from the seventh floor, but Jun-Ho reigned in his curiosity. 

Once they reach the desired floor, Jun-Ho allows his brother to guide him across the dimly lit area. When his eyes fall on the hospital bed by the window, Jun-Ho moves a little closer into his brother's side as they approach the patient.

"You must be Hwang Jun-Ho," the old man idly comments, "it must be difficult to stand with your condition, please take a seat." 

There is a small chair a foot away from the bed and In-Ho nods at him to take it. Jun-Ho hesitates at first, but his brother places a warm hand on the small of his back; gently pushing him towards it. Allowing In-Ho to lead him to the solitary chair, and helping Jun-Ho as he carefully lowered himself into the seat. Once he was seated, Jun-Ho made sure to not release the grip he had on his brother's hand; to communicate his unease with the situation. In-Ho doesn't react visibly, his expressionless mask in place since they entered the building; but he doesn't move away from Jun-Ho’s side nor pull his hand away. 

For a few moments nothing was said as the old man continued to watch the street outside his window. The babe must have picked up his growing anxiety and begins to kick rapidly. Jun-Ho inhales sharply when a couple of them land on his ribs and other internal organs; but he is grateful for the distraction from the uncomfortable silence. 

Rubbing slow circles over his expanded stomach, Jun-Ho mentally tries to soothe the unsettled child within him. He could feel In-Ho stroke the knuckles of his other hand, a subtle gesture of comfort; hidden from the old man’s view. 

"Your brother hid you well," the man speaks up once more. Causing Jun-Ho to nearly jolt out of the seat at the suddenness of the stray comment.

"I didn't know of your existence until yesterday's night," the old man turns his head and looks at In-Ho. Although it wasn't directed at him, Jun-Ho felt its intensity. 

"It's commendable, and proves my decision in choosing him as my successor," this time the man shifted his attention to Jun-Ho.

Everything in his body screamed at him to run away. He could feel the hair on the back of his neck stand, and Jun-Ho tried to sink back into the chair, instinctively placing a protective hand over his belly. In-Ho gently tightens his grip on his other hand, and the action snaps Jun-Ho out of his defensive hostility. 

He doesn't like the smile on the old man’s face, but Jun-Ho keeps his expression neutral. He sees the man’s gaze flicker to his belly and it takes everything not to snap at him.

"It's a pity I won't be able to meet that little one," his voice was almost remorseful, but it meant nothing to Jun-Ho. "It would have been interesting to see where the Hwang legacy would lead the games." 

Jun-Ho felt his blood run cold, as the colour drained from his face. He could feel the nausea building at the meaning behind those words. He feels In-Ho's grip increases once more, this time with a thumb stroking his knuckles. He wanted nothing more than to disagree and leave this place; but Jun-Ho couldn't leave his brother. 

He keeps his silence, and nearly lets out a sigh of relief when the old man shifts his focus to the window. From the one-sided dialogue, Jun-Ho could ascertain that the man on the hospital bed was the true mastermind behind the death game operation, and the man was dying - leaving the top spot open. 

A spot which his brother would fill. 

Although Jun-Ho would never accept In-Ho's involvement in this organisation, he came to terms with it. He was willing to turn a blind eye to this side of In-Ho and continue to love his brother. 

However, he couldn't tolerate the implications of their children being involved in the operation. Even though he chose to cast aside his morals and conscience, to remain beside his brother; Jun-Ho couldn't take that choice away from their unborn child. 

Jun-Ho pressed his lips into a thin line, but remained quiet whilst his brother and the old man discussed a few things. Nothing from their conversation was noteworthy, apart from the old man mentioning that he couldn't wait for his friend to come. 

The conversation then closes and In-Ho bids the old man farewell. Jun-Ho is grateful for its end, and if he could, he would have jumped out of his seat. Instead he allows In-Ho to help him out. Seeing his brother bow as a goodbye, Jun-Ho reluctantly follows suit. The walk back to the car is silent, and once he is comfortable in the back seat, he looks back at his brother, who's still standing outside beside the door. 

"I don't want the children to know about the game until they are of age.," was all that he said. Jun-Ho refuses to look at his brother, but keeps his tone firm. 

"I chose this life…" He explains, "I want to give them the same." 

There is a tense moment of silence, before In-Ho's response, "There is a reason why I kept you hidden… I wanted to keep you away from his eyes until he passed away." 

Jun-Ho couldn't figure out how this was relevant to his request to keep their children out of the death games. Either way, he allows his brother to continue. 

"I reported you as dead that day I shot you on the cliff. Only allowing a few of my trusted men in handling your rescue and subsequent accommodation with me." Jun-Ho’s eyes widened at the new information. "However, one of his people discovered your presence yesterday and reported it to him - the spy was discovered and properly dealt with. But the damage was already done." 

"Although it was one day and the Host had spent it dying in bed, I wouldn't put it past him to…" In-Ho trails off and furrows his brows as he looks away into the distance. 

Jun-Ho waits for a moment before prompting, "To?"

In-Ho sighed, but answered vaguely, "To have made some arrangements." He wanted to pry more details, but his brother continued to say, "That's why I kept you in that room."

Jun-Ho reached out for his brother's hand and interlaced their fingers, "That is not the main reason." When In-Ho meets his eyes, Jun-Ho continues, trying to put as much sincerity into his words, "I will not leave you, Hyung." 

In-Ho doesn't respond, but his eyes were searching for something on Jun-Ho’s face. He could see his brother’s disbelief being chipped away over the past few months, but he still couldn't fully trust Jun-Ho’s words. Perhaps only through the passage of time would his brother fully believe in his promise. 

"But, I will not allow our children to be exposed to games either," He adds firmly. "I made my choice, give them a chance to make theirs." 

In-Ho gently cups his face, stroking his cheek as he leans towards Jun-Ho. There is the barest amount of emotion on his brother's face, but the affectionate gesture makes up for it. Even if he didn't receive any verbal response, this was enough to satisfy Jun-Ho. Closing his eyes, Jun-Ho sighed into the feeling as In-Ho’s lips met his. Much like their first kiss, he could feel the sealing of a promise in this one. It was soft and sweet, like many of the ones they'd exchange over the past year. However, it held the weight of many unspoken words. 

Parting, In-Ho tenderly brushes away a stray lock of hair; tucking it behind his ear as he says, "Certainly." 

Jun-Ho’s eyes widened with surprise at the verbal confirmation, and immediately his expression melts into one of happiness. He could see the buried affection in his brother’s gaze in response to his reaction, and nuzzle the palm on his face. They remained in that pleasant comfortable silence, until In-Ho’s phone beeped with a new message. 

"I need to check on something quickly," He says, reading its contents. "Wait, I'll be back soon."

Jun-Ho looked at the time on the car's digital clock. It was past midnight. 

"Alright," He agrees, before quietly wishing, "Merry Christmas, Hyung." 

In-Ho pauses for a moment, but returns the wishes with a small smile, "Merry Christmas, Jun-Ho." 

He watches his brother head back into the building. A soft fluttering of kicks distracting him, he smiles softly as he speaks towards the child in his belly, "Merry Christmas to you as well."

X.

Their son was born on the dawn of the new year. 

After they returned to the island from their trip to the mainland, Jun-Ho felt a sense of restlessness in his bones. He had chalked it up to being cooped up in the room for months on end; but the days following the meeting with the old man, he noticed In-Ho relax his hold on his imprisonment. Jun-Ho was now allowed to leave his prison cell in a suite, and walk around the complex with a small team to accompany him. If not for his due date drawing near, Jun-Ho would have preferred to explore the rest of the island; but he agreed with his brother that it would be too strenuous and dangerous for him to do so.

The birth itself wasn’t anything special, apart from Jun-Ho having to experience a fourteen hour labour. He had expected it to be slow given it was his first child; however, he was nearly in tears before entering the active phase. Thinking back, it was amusing to see his ever stoic and reserved brother panic when Jun-Ho began breaking down about not wanting to do it anymore. Had they been in a normal hospital and not the suite’s bedroom, Jun-Ho would have asked one of the nurses to film his brother’s reaction; but sadly none of the staff on the island would risk angering their boss. Despite all that drama, and nearly passing out from pushing his son out into the waiting arms of the doctor; Jun-Ho felt all his tears and pain was worth it. 

Especially when they placed the much awaited babe into his arms. 

Their son was red, screaming at the top of his lungs and covered with all sorts of fluid; incredibly disgusting and repulsive, but Jun-Ho never saw something more beautiful in his life. He recalled crying when he felt the weight of the child against his chest, counting all ten toes and fingers. Jun-Ho never believed in love-at-first sight; however, this moment made him reconsider his stance. 

He recalled looking back up at his brother who was seated beside him, and being taken back at how open and expressive In-Ho’s face was. The awe, joy, affection and something absolutely tender danced across his expression as In-Ho’s eyes watched their son settle down on Jun-Ho’s chest. He could see his brother’s hands fidget, wanting to touch their son but hesitant to do so; Jun-Ho enamoured and a little exasperated by the uncertainty, picked up In-Ho’s palm and placed it on their son’s head. 

He had never seen In-Ho this captivated before.

“It’s very nice to finally meet you Du-Ho.” In-Ho's utterly besotted voice still rang in his head, and Jun-Ho still melted whenever he recalled that memory. He still flushed at what happened after; his brother pressed the gentle kiss to his sweat drenched temple, before whispering ‘Thank you’ in the same smitten tone.    

Life afterwards wasn’t any different, In-Ho prepared the suit to accommodate a newborn by furnishing it. If there was something Jun-Ho required, it would always be brought in the next day - be it equipment, clothes, or toys. The first couple of weeks were the hardest, as they were both new parents with no guidance. However, they both managed to find a routine that worked. Jun-Ho was the main caregiver, and In-Ho was not far behind to help him whenever he required help - never complaining about changing their son’s soiled diapers, bottle feeding the breast milk Jun-Ho had pumped earlier in order to have a good night's rest or soothing whenever the child worked himself into a fit. 

It was jarring to see In-Ho rock their son to sleep in his frontman uniform. (Jun-Ho noticed his brother had begun favouring a plain black suit to wear for work these days, and he spots a familiar owl mask in their dressing room. He doesn't need to ask questions he knows the answers to, so Jun-Ho promptly ignores the change). 

Even though he could walk outside and explore the island, Jun-Ho couldn’t find the energy to leave the comfort of the suite. He did make an effort to take their son outside for the baby to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine; however, the lingering chill of the tail end of winter worried him into spending too much time outside. Jun-Ho couldn’t risk their son falling sick - he was already drained enough as it is. 

Apart from the perpetual state of exhaustion, the only other thing that bothered him was the constant ache in his chest. Despite their son having a healthy appetite and pumping out the excess; Jun-Ho always felt near bursting. He hated how weak the suction of the numerous breast pumps he had ordered (it was never strong enough), and would often burst into a frustrated ball of tears whenever In-Ho returned from work. Who in turn dutifully emptied Jun-Ho’s chest. It wasn’t a strange act for them; prior to their son’s birth, In-Ho would always lavish his chest with attention - especially once he discovered Jun-Ho was extremely sensitive around that area. 

However, Jun-Ho had figured out this year's games were currently in progress. From his brother’s long hours and the restriction of not allowing him to leave the room returning once more. Not that he minded, Jun-Ho had no interest in learning more about the games or meeting those depraved VIPs. Either way, the duration of the games was about two weeks; so he didn’t care much about being locked up one more time. What did bother him was his brother’s absence; specifically his mouth on his breast and draining him completely. Thankfully, their son’s appetite had increased; allowing Jun-Ho to breastfeed the baby longer and more frequently. 

Which was what he was doing on the living room couch, whilst watching a show on the tv with subtitles and low volume. He had been thoroughly engrossed in the show and their son's feeding that he completely missed the sound of someone entering the room. 

“Hwang-Sunbae?” a voice calls him, and Jun-Ho nearly jumps out of his skin.

Immediately cradling the baby to his chest and wrapping his arms around the babe protectively, he turns towards the speaker. 

It takes a moment for him to recognise the intruder, and Jun-Ho questions back, “Hubae?”

The young man was his case partner before he disappeared from the force, and a shaky nod confirms his suspicion.

“Hwang-Sunbae, what are you doing here? The door was locked from the outside, are you being held captive? Is this where you were all this time?” His hubae begins firing questions and Jun-Ho is saved from answering them, by the piercing cry of his disgruntled son. Clearly still hungry and not fond of his interrupted feed. Sensing his ex-partner wasn’t really a threat, Jun-Ho carefully readjusted the babe in his arms and allowed his son to continue feeding - silencing the cry.

“You’re a carrier?” His junior asks both confused and surprised. “Were you kidnapped for that?” 

Jun-Ho flushes a bit, as he tries to cover himself a little more with the spare material of In-Ho’s shirt he was currently wearing. He doesn’t fault his ex-partner for thinking as such, anyone would have come to the same conclusion had they seen a breastfeeding carrier only dressed in a man’s shirt behind a locked door. Jun-Ho had become accustomed to dressing as such around the pink staff due to their lack of a reaction. However, now he felt incredibly exposed and shy in front of his colleague. 

Choosing to ignore those questions, Jun-Ho asked instead, “How did you get here? Why are you here?”

“In search of you, Sunbae,” The man answered. “Your sudden disappearance and that weird phone call. The boss wrote you down as missing but there weren't any leads. He said you sent a weird picture of three symbols and assumed you joined some crazy underground fringe church. It wasn’t until recently did another person come in with a similar card. Everyone dismissed him, calling him crazy but I recognised the symbols. Following that man here, I found out what it was.” 

Jun-Ho smiles ruefully at the similarities of his discovery and his junior’s. No wonder they were good partners. 

Before he could respond, a series of knocks broke the silence and Jun-Ho gestures to his junior to remain silent.

“Yes?” He asks towards the door. 

“Yeongbuin,” One of the soldiers in his protection detail responds, “An intruder has entered the island. Please do not panic, we shall be standing outside your door to keep the little master and yourself safe.”

“Understood.” Jun-Ho replied, and walked to the furthest corner opposite the door. His partner followed closely. 

“I’ll get you out of here, Sunbae,” the man promised, and Jun-Ho replies with an ambiguous smile. 

He looks down on the still suckling babe, and contemplates the choices at hand. Jun-Ho knew for a fact there was a new secret passage built leading to an isolated beach on the other side of the island. Equipped with a boat and all the other necessities for a speedy escape. In-Ho had shown him the area a few months ago, having built it to accommodate their smooth evacuation of their son if it was required to do so in the future. He knew there were two guards by the boat; but eyeing the revolver in his colleague's hand, that threat could be effectively neutralized. 

So with the help of his partner, he could escape the island. 

He feels incredibly conflicted by that option. Jun-Ho didn’t want his colleague who he had built a firm bond with to die. Neither did he want his brother to be taken away from once more. The most logical thing (the right thing) to do was to leave the island with his partner; with the evidence collected by his junior and Jun-Ho’s statement, they could put a stop to this depraved madness. This appealed to his moral conscience and his ideals regarding justice. His train of thought was interrupted by the feeling of his son lifting off his breast; happily full of milk. The babe looked up at him, giggling so innocently in his arms. 

At that smile Jun-Ho forms a plan in his head.

“Come there is a passage here.” He begins to explain, as he burps the baby over his shoulder.

The plan is simple. His hubae would shoot down the guards and they would climb into the boat to escape. Jun-Ho dressed both his son and himself in warm clothing as they walked briskly down the corridor. Silently listening to what his junior was saying. About the evidence he had collected and what happened to the office after his disappearance. Any questions directed at him would be answered with an evasive, “I rather not talk about it.” He allowed his junior to make the necessary assumption and was grateful for the man not pressing him for details.

When they arrived at the beach, Jun-Ho let his partner deal with guards before making his way to the boat.

“I’ll untie the boat,” his colleague explains, as he hands the gun to Jun-Ho’s hand. “There is still one more round. Watch that exit until I prepare everything to leave.”

Sleeping child wrapped firmly against his chest, Jun-Ho takes the gun and nods his head in agreement, “Sure.”

He cocks back the hammer, and aims at the cave entrance they had exited from a few minutes prior - ready to shoot anyone who appears from the darkness. Through the corner of his eye, Jun-Ho watches his hubae make quick work of the rope anchoring the boat to the dock. Once the man’s back is completely turned to him, Jun-Ho silently changes his position. 

Pointing the barrel at the man’s head.

He doesn’t even feel himself pulling the trigger, but the gunshot wakes up his son.    

“I’m sorry, Hubae,” he says remorsefully, as he watches his partner’s body collapse on the dock, blood seeping out of the bullet wound. 

“But I don’t want to leave.”

Jun-Ho drops the empty gun to the wooden dock, and begins soothing the startled child.

X.

The motion sensors in the evacuation tunnel were what tipped In-Ho off. Along with lack of response from the guards by the boat, when called only confirmed the fears he had tried to bury deep within his mind. 

That Jun-Ho would inevitably leave him. 

He was grateful for the mask obscuring his face, for the guests would have picked up on his anguish. When his successor to the Front Man role informed him about the intruder he hadn’t paid much attention - unlike when Jun-Ho snuck into the facility they had increased the security of the area. However, the intruder still managed to slip through their fingers. From the surveillance footage they had managed to identify the man as his brother’s old partner. Had there been no pressing need to find the intruder; In-Ho would have laughed at the similarities between the detective partners. 

The sight of an empty room and vacant crib ripped In-Ho’s very existence apart. 

He always told himself to not believe in those sweet words - the sweet promises his brother would say about not leaving him. However, with the birth of their son; In-Ho found himself lowering his guard and listening. 

Now look where that got him.

In-Ho couldn’t let his brother escape now, not after all their time together - maybe back when he first brought Jun-Ho to the room; but no longer was it an option in his mind. Much as he hated making Jun-Ho sad, In-Ho vowed to drag his brother back to him. Possibly chaining him to their bed once In-Ho found where he had run off to. He couldn’t care less if Jun-Ho began hating him; he couldn’t live without his brother by his side. In-Ho considered other methods in securing his brother as he walked down the escape route, weighing each option for their possible benefits and detriments.

However, his mind grows deadly silent at the scene that greets him. 

Jun-Ho standing alone on the dock, before the body of his old partner whilst cuddling their son in his arms. In-Ho instructs one of the soldiers to check the body as he slowly makes his way towards his brother. 

“You’re late,” was all Jun-Ho said when he noticed In-Ho. Tone tinted with playfulness, but In-Ho can see the exhaustion clinging to corners of his brother's eyes. 

His eyes drift to the gun at Jun-Ho’s feet and he puts the pieces together. This wasn’t an easy decision for his brother to make. 

“You didn’t leave.” He states, voice completely in awe and disbelief. 

Jun-Ho lets out an exasperated sigh before responding, “I’ve told you many times before, I’m not leaving you - why can’t you believe that, Hyung?” 

In-Ho doesn’t even notice the sharpness in his tone, instead he replies, “I believe you now.”

That cuts off any verbal spiel Jun-Ho had been preparing to unleash, and he watches his little brother blink at him in confusion. Clearly taken off guard. 

“Oh...” Jun-Ho trails off awkwardly, “finally, I guess.” 

Perhaps it is due to the rapid change in his emotions that makes In-Ho chuckle out loud. From heart-wrenching anguish to the pinnacle of happiness in a matter of minutes would make anyone a little out of character. All he could feel right now is sheer relief, as the anxiety of his brother's supposed escape was proven wrong. Another more complicated emotion also builds within his chest, and he couldn't quite put his finger on it. But it is tender, soft, and gentle - growing and consuming him the longer he stared at Jun-Ho.

In-Ho feels the rapid beating of his heart gradually decline to a steady relaxed pace; at this moment, everything was perfect. Unable to contain himself, In-Ho gathers his brother and child into a firm embrace (ignoring the presence of the guards and commanders watching them). 

Jun-Ho snuggles into his arms, and whispers into his ear, “I’m cold. Take us home, Hyung.”

The use of the word 'home' pleased In-Ho immensely; causing the sides of his mouth to hook up. He didn't need to be told, for In-Ho would have done just that.

On their way back to the suite, In-Ho informs the Front Man he wouldn’t be returning to observe the games and to look after the VIPs. He had more pressing matters on his hands, as he watched Jun-Ho put their sleeping son into his crib before jumping into the shower to chase away the lingering chill he had gotten from the beach. Meanwhile, In-Ho removed his tie and popped the top button; helping himself to a glass of expensive whiskey. 

He catches his reflection on a nearby mirror, and he almost couldn’t recognise himself. His expression is less severe and overall he seemed more relaxed. 

‘I guess being confident that your loved ones won’t leave does take a few years off,’ He muses before turning his attention towards the sound of the ensuite bathroom door opening. Leaning against the master bedroom doorway, In-Ho silently watched his brother towel himself dry. 

Nearly four months have passed since the birth of their son, and In-Ho had watched the subtle changes in his brother's body. Gradually the excess pregnancy weight faded, but some of it still clung to Jun-Ho’s thighs and hips. His chest, although considerably plump during the latter weeks of his pregnancy; only grew further in the following months. In-Ho let his eyes trail downwards and noticed many of the stretch marks had faded into silver lines. He recalled how painfully red they were, having dutifully applied all the creams and oils on Jun-Ho’s skin. 

“Not what I once was, isn’t it?” Jun-Ho’s voice grabbed his attention. Catching him staring through the full length mirror Jun-Ho was standing in front of, unconsciously wrapping himself with the towel to cover his body from chest to mid-thigh.  

In-Ho placed his glass on the nearby table, and walked towards his brother, only stopping a hair’s breadth away from behind Jun-Ho. He could feel the heat of the shower through his clothes and the fresh scent of their shared toiletries. In-Ho reached from under his brother's arms, and began undoing the towel wrapped around him, whilst maintaining eye contact through the reflection. Allowing the material to fall, In-Ho begins to run his hand across Jun-Ho’s skin. Fingertips tracing every curve of muscle, stretch mark, and scar. 

“You’ve become incredibly beautiful,” He whispers huskily into his brother’s ear. Watching Jun-Ho’s eyes flutter close momentarily as a shiver ran through his body.

Before Jun-Ho could argue that statement; In-Ho cupped his brother’s breasts gently in the palms of his hands, lightly thumbing and teasing the abused nub. “This chest is always filled with milk,” he comments, as he continues to knead the flesh. “Unconditionally providing our son with all the nutrition he needs,” he adds, listening to the series of soft sighs and moans Jun-Ho unknowingly releases. In-Ho had become quite proficient in massaging his brother’s chest, due to how often it would become engorged.

With his fingers he wipes away the bead of milk forming on top of Jun-Ho’s nipples, and brings it to his mouth. Never breaking eye contact he licks his wet fingertips, and says, “and you taste absolutely divine.”

Jun-Ho's expression is caught between embarrassment and arousal, and In-Ho feels something feral beginning to wake up within him. Ignoring it, he slowly shifts his hands down to his brother’s belly. In-Ho traces each and every stretch mark he can find through touch, committing each and every one to his memory. Jun-Ho’s eyes flicker downwards and In-Ho once more whispers into his brother’s ear, “This is proof of you bringing our son safely into this world. It is nothing you should be ashamed of or hide.”

“You were beautiful before,” He continues, keeping his voice soft and tender. “You are beautiful now,” and with that he presses his hardened length into Jun-Ho’s supple bottom. 

“This is what your body does to me, Jun-ho,” In-Ho purrs, and smirks at the flush that appears on his brother’s skin. He can tell that Jun-Ho is pleased by the small smile on his lips, and both their gazes begin to grow heavy with arousal. 

Due to the stress of having a newborn and the injuries of childbirth, In-Ho had made sure to never approach his brother in any sexual manner for the past couple of months. He didn’t want to pressure Jun-Ho in any way; making sure to keep their affections light and chaste. However, In-Ho had a feeling that decision may have played a role in his brother’s declining self-confidence. He had noticed his brother glaring in the mirror before and complaining about his changed body. In-Ho did try to comfort him by complementing those changes, but it was always met with disbelief and dismissal.

‘Time to correct that.’ he thought to himself, as he pressed a kiss on the skin behind Jun-Ho’s ear. 

Gently wrapping his arms around his brother’s naked body, In-Ho began to leave a trail of kisses down the side of Jun-Ho’s neck. He made sure to keep his embrace light and unrestrictive, just in case his brother didn’t feel like he was in the mood. However, the low moans Jun-Ho let out told him otherwise. In-Ho could feel his brother lean into his arms, and press his back into his chest, grinding his bottom into his growing erection. 

Jun-Ho then turned around in his arms, and they both stared into each other’s eyes. Everything seemed to slow down and all In-Ho could hear was the matching rhythm of their breaths. After a few moments, he sees Jun-Ho close his eyes and lean forward. Instinctively, In-Ho closes his eyes in response and lets their lips meet. Half surprised due to it being the first kiss Jun-Ho had initiated since their relationship moved beyond a familial one a year ago. 

Much like the ones they exchanged earlier, the first kiss was always light and innocent. No matter how heated the mood would become, In-Ho made sure their first kiss was tender. He could tell his brother wasn’t used to leading because he didn’t know what to do next. In-Ho smiled fondly into their kiss before relaxing his jaw, letting his tongue slip out and trace the outline of Jun-Ho’s lips as a silent ask of permission to enter. Immediately, he felt his brother’s lip part and on cue In-Ho dived into a familiar wet warmth. 

Despite how keyed up they both were for the main part, In-Ho forced himself to go slow - setting the pace for the both of them. It was the first time in months, and although Jun-Ho was fully healed from the birth; there was nothing wrong in being too careful. He could feel the impatience building in Jun-Ho’s frame, and in response, In-Ho began running his hands down his brother’s spine to calm him. Raking his fingers up and squeezing the back of Jun-Ho’s neck as he rolled their tongue together. It was a weak spot of his brother, and he drank in the low moan Jun-Ho released as he fell pliant into In-Ho’s arms.

Once his lungs burned for air, In-Ho pulled himself away from his brother. Pupils blown wide accompanied with a dazed expression seemed to always look good on Jun-Ho. 

And to know he was the reason behind that blissed out look, pleased In-Ho endlessly. 

Voice rough with arousal, In-Ho growled, “Let’s take this to the bed.”

“Wait.” Jun-Ho says as he comes to, before falling to his knees. 

This was a surprise, as Jun-Ho was quite shy in the bedroom. So having him become assertive - made In-Ho’s cock throb. Although his brother was shy about it, didn’t mean he didn’t desire sex. After all, it wasn’t a surprise when Jun-Ho became pregnant. Given how often they wound up tangled with each other, In-Ho had expected their son’s conception to happen sooner.

With experienced hands, Jun-Ho made quick work of his belt, and In-Ho nearly ripped the button off his shirt. On his knees and with hands on In-Ho’s pants, Jun-Ho pulled down the zipper with his teeth. The slow drawn out sound of the tab parting the metal teeth, made In-Ho’s body shudder with anticipation. He watched as his brother's fingers hook around the waistband of his underwear and with one swift movement pull them downwards along with his pants - freeing his throbbing cock. Feeling the cold air on his cock made In-Ho shiver, but the arousal running rampant within him didn't make the feeling entirely uncomfortable.

In-Ho lets out a strangled noise when he feels his brother grip the base of his cock, and seal the head with his lips. Instinctively, In-Ho reaches down and buries his hands in Jun-Ho's hair. The change in temperature from the cold room to the addictive warmth of his brother’s mouth pulls yet another shudder from him. In-Ho groans as he feels his brother’s tongue swirl around the head of cock, the tip of his tongue alternating between flicking at the slit and tracing his frenulum. Inch by inch he watched intensely as Jun-Ho fed his length into his mouth; groaning when his brother decided to hollow his cheeks to suck. 

Occasionally Jun-How would look up, and meet his gaze. Maybe there was something he wanted to see, for his brother would run his tongue around his shaft whilst sucking his length. The joint sensation of the vacuum and an agile tongue coating his length in saliva made In-Ho pant as his ever-present control on his expression began to waver. Jun-Ho must have found what he was looking for, as he returned to feeding In-Ho’s cock further into his mouth. 

He could feel his younger brother change the angle of his head, and the increased squeezing sensation as the head of his cock began to move into Jun-Ho’s throat. After a few careful moments, In-Ho shuddered at the sight of his entire length buried deep into his brother’s mouth - lips touching the base of his cock and throat tightening around its head. He waits for a moment until Jun-Ho makes eye contact. Taking that as a cue, In-Ho tightens the grip he has on his brother’s hair and pulls Jun-Ho’s hair back. 

The pace is slow and the withdrawing motion allows his brother to breathe in. In-Ho continues to pull back until an inch of cock remains in Jun-Ho’s mouth; pausing a little, he then pushes Jun-Ho’s head forward. His brother’s mouth is relaxed but his lips still remain sealed tight. Gradually In-Ho begins to increase the speed, carefully watching Jun-Ho’s expression in case he needs to stop. Saliva seeping past those now reddened lips; making everything slick, wet, and sloppy. In-Ho then pushes his brother’s head into him, burying his cock deep into his throat. He feels Jun-Ho choke on his length and the swallowing sensation tightening repetitively around the head of his cock.

Pausing for a second, In-Ho immediately pulls his brother off his cock with an audible pop. The lack of oxygen made Jun-Ho’s eyes hazy and filled with unshed tears; but it only added to the utterly debauched expression that was on his face. Lips puffy and red with saliva dripping down his chin. 

“Honestly, where did you learn to suck cock like that?” He asked rhetorically, cupping his brother’s face. To which Jun-Ho only smiled mysteriously as he nuzzled into his hand. Jun-Ho had been a complete novice the first time he had given In-Ho head. However, the younger man seemed to be natural as he rapidly picked up the technique over the past year. 

(Maybe that VIP had sensed Jun-Ho’s talent, which was why he singled him out). 

Chuckling and after kicking off his pants, In-Ho picked up Jun-Ho from the floor. The longer-term kneeling had caused his brother’s legs to fall numb and unresponsive. With little effort, In-Ho gently laid his brother on their bed. 

“Now my turn,” He crooned, whilst slipping between Jun-Ho’s thighs. His upper body weight distributed between his elbows that were on either side of his brother’s chest. In-Ho begins with a soft kiss on Jun-Ho’s reddened lips, before making his way down. He kisses down the long milky column of his brother’s neck, leaving a trail of marks as he moves downwards. The sight of those red kiss marks always brought him deep primal satisfaction. Much like Jun-Ho walking around in his shirt. Add a hickey peeking over the collar, would never fail to make In-Ho’s chest rumble. 

Once he was at Jun-Ho’s chest, he shifted his weight to one arm. With one hand free, In-Ho began massaging one breast; rolling the erect nub between his thumb and index. Whilst the other he flicked with his tongue. Jun-Ho gasped and shivered in response, but arched his back when In-Ho sealed his lips around the nipple. Wetting the teat and being mindful of his teeth, In-Ho supported the bottom of the nipple with his tongue before he began to suckle. After a few dry sucks, he hears Jun-Ho let out a sigh as the milk hits his tongue.

He noticed Jun-Ho’s chest wasn’t as swollen as it usually was, indicating their son must have been fed not too long ago. This whole routine had initially begun as a means to reduce the painful pressure Jun-Ho was suffering due to overproduction and none of the pumps properly emptying him. However, as time went by; they both had grown accustomed to it and sought some pleasure in the activity. In-Ho had noticed the hardening of Jun-Ho’s length during those times, but wisely kept his silence as a courtesy not to place pressure. 

After lavishing one side, In-Ho repeated his action on the other. There was no need to drain Jun-Ho dry as their son would require a feed soon. There was no need to steal their child’s food. Releasing the nipple with an audible pop, In-Ho looked up at Jun-Ho who was completely relaxed between his arms. Smiling at the blissed out expression, he shifted himself downwards. 

In-Ho then pressed a tender kiss on the centre of his brother’s belly, which pulled a soft giggle. It is soft and innocent, reminding In-Ho of a time in their youth. Then he continues to trace each stretch mark with his tongue; peppering kisses and whispering soft praises against the skin. Regardless of how aroused they both were, In-Ho enjoyed this moment of pampering his brother. He could tell with each compliment and praise, Jun-Ho’s expression melts into pleased shyness - clearly enjoying the attention In-Ho is showering his body with. 

When he thinks that he has covered each mark, In-Ho shuffles to the side to grab the bottle of lube from the bedside drawer. Usually he would have blown his brother as well, but today he wants Jun-Ho to come solely untouched.

He reaches for one of the spare pillows on their bed, and shifts it under Jun-Ho’s hips, propping his brother up. Slicking one of his hands with lube, In-Ho places his other hand beside Jun-Ho’s head; leaning forward to hover above his brother. Keeping his gaze trained on Jun-Ho’s face, In-Ho reaches between his brother’s bottom cheeks with his lubed middle finger. As soon as his finger touches the tight rim, In-Ho feels Jun-Ho’s body tense up. 

It has been a while since they’ve last had sex, and In-Ho understands the trepidation Jun-Ho is currently feeling. So he keeps his touch light whilst he continues to circle the opening, allowing his brother to become accustomed to the sensation. When he sees the tension ebbing away, In-Ho slowly pushes his middle finger past the tight ring of muscle. Jun-Ho’s eyes flutter closed as his breath hitches at the intrusion. In-Ho pauses for a moment to read his brother’s expression, and once he is assured there isn’t any pain he continues to push until his knuckle hits the entrance.

In-Ho gives a few moments for Jun-Ho to grow used to the sensation of something penetrating him, and lets the younger man adjust his position to what he felt was comfortable. When he feels the clenching around his finger reduce, In-Ho pulls his finger back; equally slow and controlled. Only to push back in when only his tip remained inside. After a few move pumps, In-Ho slips in his index finger. Once more he felt Jun-Ho’s body tense up, and he paused again. Feeling his brother relax around the new stretch, In-Ho pumps his fingers in and out. 

He scissors his fingers to loosen the tight ring of muscles even further. Occasionally curving the fingers inside Jun-Ho, so the fingertips would catch on the inside rim and In-Ho would pull slightly to stretch the opening. Jun-Ho’s cries gradually build from soft gasps and hitched breaths to low moans and mewls. Due to playing with his opening, Jun-Ho barely even flinches when In-Ho adds his ring finger. With all three fingers buried deep within his brother, In-Ho begins to press around in search of the particular spot.

Thanks to his good memory, it doesn’t take long to find Jun-Ho’s prostate. Applying sudden pressure, immediately causes Jun-Ho to arch his back and keen. The reaction is sinfully erotic, and it spurs In-Ho to continue teasing the gland. With each subsequent stroke, Jun-Ho’s moans begin to climb a notch. In-Ho can feel his brother try to rut against, to gain some friction on his much neglected cock. However, In-Ho wanted to push his brother to the very edge; hence he lifted his hips a little to prevent any sort of contact.

It didn’t take long for Jun-Ho to turn into a sobbing mess as he begged In-Ho to stop teasing him. Much as the pleading tone and tears welling up in Jun-Ho’s eyes chipped at In-Ho’s control, he continued his onslaught of pumping his finger in and out - making sure to rub against his brother’s prostate. Only when he felt the tell-tale sign of muscles tensing and clenching around his finger did In-Ho withdraw his fingers completely. 

Jun-Ho lets out a frustrated cry at the sudden emptiness, and In-Ho smirks at the disappointed whine that soon followed. 

Reaching for the bottle on the bed, he squirts lube on his cock. After that amazing blow job and watching his brother slowly drown in pleasure, had his length throb painfully. He couldn’t wait to feel those smooth wet walls wrap around his length. In-Ho licked his lips in anticipation, once he returned to his original position between Jun-Ho’s thighs.

He is not the only one who’s excited; as Jun-Ho spreads his legs when he feels the blunt head of In-Ho’s cock against his opening. He waits for his brother to nod his head, before pushing his hips forward. In-Ho watches his brother throw his head back and claw at the sheets as he pushes bit by bit. Even he is overwhelmed by the tight slick heat cocooning his cock, and bites down on his lower lip to distract himself. In-Ho doesn’t stop until he is buried to the hilt. 

Fully sheathed, In-Ho leans forward; his face a few inches above Jun-Ho’s. They both need a moment, and he feels Jun-Ho wrap his legs around his waist. Remaining like that for a few moments; he senses Jun-Ho’s walls relax around his cock. Once In-Ho finally has a grip on his growing orgasm; he begins to thrust. At first the thrusts are shallow and slow, each one growing by an inch at a time - letting them both grow accustomed to the dragging sensation. Bit by bit In-Ho builds the speed and strength of his thrusts. 

Jun-Ho moves his hands from the sheets to around his neck, clinging to In-Ho as he angles his thrust at the prostate. Each pull and push caused his brother to keen and mewl; turning him into a babbling mess. In-Ho himself wasn’t any better, clenching his jaw and grunting as his orgasm steadily climbed. Breaking the rhythm to suddenly snap his hips forward, to pull out a loud moan. Then grinding to pull out a series of broken whimpers. In-Ho couldn’t tear his eyes away from his brother.

Seeing Jun-Ho lost in the throes of passion - was breathtaking.

Growling at the knowledge that he was the one responsible.

That he was the only one seeing it.

They both didn’t last long, for In-Ho felt his brother’s body lurch up as his arms and legs tighten around him; walls clamping down on In-Ho’s cock as he finally came between them, crying out in pleasure. In-Ho followed closely after, rutting against the shuddering form below. His low groans drowned the soft whimpers Jun-Ho released as he emptied deep inside his brother.  

Careful not to crush Jun-Ho, In-Ho held himself up with his arms; but rested his forehead against the younger man’s. They both were panting heavily, shivering in the aftershocks of their orgasms. When their breathing returned to normal, In-Ho pulled out of Jun-Ho, who gasped weakly at the sensation. Collapsing to the side, In-Ho gathered Jun-Ho into his arms. Jun-Ho in turn, cuddled into his side; resting his head on In-Ho’s shoulder. The two of them enjoyed the afterglow in silence. 

“Hyung,” Jun-Ho softly calls out to him, voice hoarse. 

In-Ho hums gently in response, turning his head towards his brother.

Jun-Ho reaches out and traces the scar of his bullet wound, the one he had given over a year ago. 

“I will never leave you, Hyung,” Jun-Ho repeats the promise like he always does. “I love you, In-Ho.”

That causes In-Ho’s heart to skip a beat. Unlike the times before, Jun-Ho had never used his name when saying those words. 

Swallowing the lump in his throat, In-Ho pushes himself up. He then leans across and presses his lips against a similar scar on Jun-Ho’s shoulder. Lifting up he looks directly into his brother’s eyes.

This time there is no mask, no control. All his emotions are raw and bare.

“I believe in you,” He whispers tenderly, trying to pack in much of his feeling into his voice. “And I love you, Jun-Ho.”

His brother lets out a choked cry. Tears welling up in his eyes once more and spilling over. No matter how many times, Jun-Ho had professed his love to him; In-Ho had only smiled enigmatically in response. Although he loved his brother, In-Ho couldn’t bring himself to say those words directly. With the fear of Jun-Ho leaving his side, he couldn’t expose his heart like that. Rather he had chosen to show his feelings through actions. 

But now it was different. 

Gathering the sobbing Jun-Ho into his arms, In-Ho continued to repeat those words until his brother calmed down. 

Everything about their relationship was wrong, from the beginning till now. Even in the future, In-Ho had no hope.

However, nothing felt more right.

X.

Life in Du-Ho’s eyes wasn’t all that complicated. 

Despite being ten years old, he already knew that he was from a fairly well-off family. His friends at his private school always told him that he lived in a good part of Seoul and he always had the latest stuff - be it clothing, shoes, or other school items. He had good grades and from all the girls confessing to him, he deduced he had good looks as well. Even his life at home was miles better than the other kids in the class. 

He could clearly see that his parents were completely devoted to each other. None of that weird drama that his classmates often spoke about - like having another mother or father. Or catching their parents kissing other people. Du-Ho even remembered a time he was treated as an outcast for not seeing his parents fight. Much as he wanted friends at school, he never wished for his mother and father to not love one another. The home life his classmates discussed wasn't something to be envious about, and he would much rather have it remain unrelatable to him. 

From the many discussions that took place in school, Du-Ho realised he lived a different life. 

Although it was common to have many siblings, it wasn’t common for all of them to be from the same set of parents. His memory was vague but Du-Ho clearly remembered his mother’s belly growing for his two younger brothers and sister. Then again almost all of his memories of Eomma were of him being pregnant. Even now, Eomma was carrying their youngest sibling. His sister had wanted another girl, whilst his brother and himself wanted another boy to play with. 

Eomma had laughed at their demands, and answered elusively, “We’ll see.”

Having been invited to many birthday parties, Du-Ho had noticed there were few similarities between his parents and his classmates. In most cases they had one workaholic parent, usually the father; whilst the other would stay at home and look after the children. However, that was all that was in common. He didn’t see any affection traded between the parents; no kind smiles, soft words, or gentle touches. Everything was cold, distant and business-like. Siblings always fought, sometimes encouraged by the parents if the children were of different mothers or fathers.  

All in all, nothing Du-Ho was jealous about. 

Yes, his parents had completely different personalities. Yet, they had the most harmonious relationship Du-Ho had seen.

Appa was always reserved and expressionless whenever he was around the house, whilst Eomma was never ashamed to wear his emotions so openly. Despite Appa’s usual cold and distant nature; Du-Ho could see the slight upward turn of his father’s lips whenever his gaze fell on Eomma. He could see Appa always gravitating towards Eomma, wrapping his arm around Eomma’s waist and exchanging a few soft words. Du-Ho couldn’t catch what they were, but Eomma would often smile back and press a soft kiss against Appa’s cheek.

The only time Du-Ho had seen Eomma unhappy with Appa was always during a specific month of a year. Du-Ho couldn’t figure out what it was that made Eomma so unhappy, but it always had to do with Appa leaving the house for this specific business trip that would take about a month. At first he had thought Eomma was sad that Appa was leaving for so long - he had noticed that Eomma would never leave the house unless it was with Appa or with them. But then, as he grew older Du-Ho picked up that Eomma was more irritated than sad. He had seen that same look of disappointment directed at him whenever he did something wrong. 

Du-Ho figured it had something to do with Appa’s work. So, he decided to ask Appa what he did for a living; disguising the reason as his classmates had asked him. However, Du-Ho immediately regretted his question from the frozen look on Eomma’s face. 

Appa seemed to be unperturbed by the question and vaguely replied, “I will tell you when you're older, but for now just say I arrange games.”

Although he wanted to ask more about it, Du-Ho could feel the tension coming from his mother and something on his father’s face told him that he wouldn’t be receiving any more information. As a result, he never brought up the topic again; despite his growing curiosity about the subject. However, Du-Ho had the common sense to leave those questions for when he was older. 

Whatever it was, it couldn’t be anything too terrible. 

Unlike his many classmates with broken families, Du-Ho’s was stable and filled with love. Although Appa would always be busy working, he never ignored his family. His Eomma was never drunk or going out with friends, he was always there for Du-Ho and his siblings. They never lacked anything, be it materialistic or non-materialistic. Affection and tenderness was always shared freely amongst them (Appa may not show it, but Du-Ho knew his father enjoyed it when Du-Ho or his siblings cuddled up to him). 

He had heard his schoolmates gossip about families with bad jobs that have the worst homes. So by that logic, whatever Appa did for a living wasn’t bad.