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The headache setting between his eyes was turning the few words that reached him in nothing but gibberish.

Artorius leaned on the desk, on his elbow, and covered his mouth with his hand, containing the urge of just bury his face in it. Still, the exorcist in front of him stuttered and started talking even faster, sensing his unease and assuming it was his fault.

It wasn’t, at all, but Artorius was reaching the point where taking his frustrations on this young Praetor didn’t seem like that bad of an idea. At the very least he should tell him to shut up.

The last two weeks had been absolute hell. He had spent some days in Eastgand, which in itself was taxing enough, doing research on Innominat. The investigation had him hopping everywhere in the continent, and after he was done he had to go to Southgand in hopes of sorting the problems with the local religion, which he already knew was a lost cause, and then back to Loegres again, only to be greet with a mountain of bureaucratic work for which he was, somehow, indispensable.

That was the hardest part about being The Shepherd. Not the herding of the masses, not the tempering with an Empyrean or the malevolence, not the fate of the world resting of his shoulders, no. It was all the bullshit he had to deal with in daily basis over the most prosaic of matters. Like whatever this Praetor had come to tell him.

The young man was getting nervous by the second and when Artorius looked straight at him, in an attempt to focus, he just broke. His voice got caught in his throat and he made a wheezing sound. He cleared his throat, trying to regain his composure and ended up in coughing fit that made Artorius roll his eyes so hard he could almost see the bright, blinding pain of his headache pulsing inside his skull.

Behind him, dutifully standing at his right like a good bodyguard, Shigure laughed. The Praetor could as well drop dead from the embarrassment.

Artorius turned to look at Shigure with the cold fury he had been trying so hard to don’t direct the Praetor. Shigure was a better target for it, he thought faintly, he was not going to pass out for a hard gaze, right?

He didn’t, but it made him pause and Artorius caught the slight twitch in his right hand, like he wanted to reach for his sword. Good.

Artorius didn’t say a word, he just stared at him, challenging him to keep laughing or to do anything, anything at all that could make this situation even more unbearable and give him an excuse to do something about it, what he didn’t know.

Instead, Shigure coughed and said:

“Sorry,” he went around the desk and approached the Praetor “hey, still with us?”

The Praetor nodded, tears in his eyes that he could fortunately blame to the coughing fit and his face as red as the scarlet night.

“I’m—I’m sorry, I—“

He tried to speak but Shigure shushed him. He reached for a jar of water that was resting on the desk and poured a glass. He gave it to the Praetor and told him to drink. The young exorcist did as he was told and when he finished he looked like a person again.

“Look,” Shigure started before the Praetor could say something “this is not a great time. There are many important things Lord Artorius has to take care of right now, so why don’t you make a report and send it our way later?”

“Well, it’s just, Lord Melchior said—“

“Let us worry about Lord Melchior. If he asks you, tell him I turned you away.”

The Praetor blinked a few times and suddenly he didn’t look like an exorcist, or a soldier, or nothing at all. Suddenly he seemed small and ridiculous in the all-white armor. He looked like what he was: a child, probably no older than sixteen. Having Shigure’s robust figure looming over him didn’t help.

Artorius watched the exchange with mild curiosity. He knew Shigure was an older brother and seeing the way he had handle the situation it wasn’t hard to imagine he had been a good one. Or that he could’ve been a good one, he was knowledgeable enough on the Rangetsu Clan to guess that that had probably not been the case.

The Praetor turned to look at Artorius, questioning. He made a dismissive gesture with his hand.

There was some more apologies, an exaggerate bow before he finally left and then blissful silence for three seconds.

“We’re grumpy today aren’t we?”

Artorius turned to Shigure with a grimace but found he didn’t have to strength to stare him down.

“There are many important things I have to take care of, it’s truth,” he said, ignoring the comment “I should get to it.”

He readjusted on his chair and looked with a pained expression, a face he wouldn’t allow himself to make if someone else were in the room, at the documents scattered in the desk. His headache pulsed.

“You’re not getting anything done like that,” Shigure observed helpfully.

“And what do you suggest?” Artorius gritted his teeth, turning to look at him once more “We can’t all just stand around, look pretty, and call it a day.”

Shigure smiled, big and hungry, like Artorius had just challenge him to a duel.

“You think I’m pretty?”

Artorius scoffed and turned back to his work.

“All I’m saying,” Shigure continued calmly “is that you’re clearly in pain, you’re tired and I’m sure all this can wait. It already waited a few weeks, what is a few hours?”

“And what do you suggest?” Artorius asked him again, because maybe he was actually making sense.

Shigure shrugged.

“I don’t know, go take a nap, go let out some steam at the training ground or…” he made a strange pause and then smiled to himself “something to take your mind off work.” He said this lower, like it was a secret.

Artorius considered him for a moment.

“And…what do you suggest?” he asked for the third time.

Shigure pressed his lips together, like he was trying very hard to don’t laugh. He shook his head in disbelief, still in on a joke Artorius was not getting.

“Shigure,” Artorius called because he didn’t like not knowing.

Finally Shigure let out a shaky giggle, perplexing Artorius even more, and leaned with both hands on the other side of the desk. Artorius leaned towards him too, like expecting to hear a particularly juicy piece of gossip.

Shigure looked directly at Artorius, and then dragged his eyes to his lips, to his chest and his gaze seemed to even look through the desk. He very intently licked his lips. Artorius felt a shiver travel in his back.

“Maybe there’s something I can do to take your mind off work.” His voice was deep and sensual, and very slowly he took his eyes to Artorius’ face again.

Artorius blushed. He didn’t turn his eyes away, however.

“Like what?” He asked harshly, as if it weren’t obvious enough. Shigure was messing with him and he wouldn’t have it. “Are you, perhaps, offering to suck me off?”

Shigure got up, as if Artorius’ words had pushed him back. He was pleased with the reaction, his good for nothing bodyguard was not the only one who could play that game.

Shigure shrugged and quickly regained his nonchalance. He was smirking again.

“If you want.”

Artorius pierced him with his gaze but it didn’t have the effect from before. Shigure just stood there, looking relaxed, as if nothing weird was going on. It wasn’t the first time Shigure made an insinuation, though he was usually a lot more subtle, instead of giving him bedroom eyes and licking his lips with absolute impudence.

It was the first time Artorius engaged in the banter. He would usually just ignore him, he had accepted that was just something Shigure did and if he didn’t think much about it then it didn’t matter.

He was now thinking about it.

“You’re messing with me.” Artorius said and turned back to his work. He inked a nearby quill and held it, hovering over a paper he had no idea if he had to sign or not.

He should’ve know that was not the right thing to say. Shigure was laughing his boastful laugh again, though if he paid attention it sounded a little strained. Or maybe he was just hearing things, his head still hurt after all.

“No, no, really,” Shigure said, a smile on his voice “if you want me to.”

“Do you want to?” Artorius couldn’t help asking, turning to him again and dropping the quill, his voice going slightly higher because this was ridiculous!

Shigure licked his lips again, but it didn’t seem intentional this time.

“If you want me to.”

Did he want him to? Artorius wasn’t blind, of course he had noticed Shigure, he was handsome and had an alluring body he loved showing around and maybe Artorius had indulge in some glances here and there, when no one could tell, maybe he had even dare wonder about how it would be like to—

And he was human. And he was so weak.

“Close the door.” He said with no more preambles because he either lost Shigure’s respect making a fool of himself or he got a blowjob.

He had never seen Shigure move as clumsily as he did now, stumbling on his way to the door and closing it, the mechanism clicking with fatality.

“The curtains too.”

Just as fast Shigure went to the window and let the heavy drapes envelop them in half-light.  They were too high for anyone to peak at the windows but Artorius was not taking chances.

He got up. There was a couch behind the chair, facing the windows and with a rectangular center table in front of it. He shoved the table out of the way and flopped down on the couch.

He and Shigure stared at each other across the room.

Artorius had a moment of hesitation, a moment of hope. Perhaps they were still playing some sort of twisted game, perhaps it was about which one of them would call it off first. Perhaps he could still call it off.

Or not. Shigure walked towards him, slower but on surer feet than moments before and without any more overtures, not even a word, sank down on his knees between Artorius’ open legs.

It was telling, really, that that alone made his lower belly burn and his dick stir.

Shigure wasted no time. He took off his gloves and then put his hands on Artorius’ knees, spreading his legs as far as his pants would let him and moved upwards, caressing his thighs until he was millimeters away from his crotch…and then down again. He did this a few times and Artorius was tempted to tell him to hurry up, but he was also curious of what the other would do.

The next time his hands stopped before really touching him, Shigure looked upwards for a moment, caught Artorius’ gaze and smirked with promise. He then leaned forward and licked him over his clothes, still keeping the eye contact. He sank in his crotch, opening and closing his mouth over his hardening dick.

Artorius had half a mind to think that that shouldn’t turn him on as it did. He could feel Shigure’s warm, but it wasn’t enough, nor was the slight pressure of his openmouthed kisses and still Artorius felt himself losing it just over it. Perhaps it was that no one had done anything like this to him in a very long time, or maybe that Shigure looked absolutely ravishing between his legs, looking up at him with bright, honest eyes.

He let out a shaky sigh.

When the strain on his clothes became painfully obvious Shigure stopped. He unclasped Artorius’ pants, as if he had done this a thousand times before, and with sure hands took out his dick, hard and leaking.

Shigure put his hands on Artorius thighs again and watched him. He seemed to think over something and then nodded, having come to a decision.

He moved his hands to Artorius hips and pulled him closer to the edge of the couch. He dived in and licked him from the base to the tip. Artorius saw with terrible clearness how his flat tongue travel over his dick and then, when it caught the drop of precum at the head, Shigure moaned, a deep, long ‘Mmm!’ like he had just eaten something especially delightful.

Artorius cursed.

Shigure didn’t give him a moment’s rest. He licked him like that again and when the length inevitably slipped from his tongue he just let his dick fall on his cheeks and opened his mouth bigger to catch it again. It was obscene. Artorius took his hand to the neck of his shirt and tried to open it up a little, it was too hot all of the sudden.

When he finally tired of that game, Shigure paused for a moment not looking at Artorius anymore, the dick in front of him having taken all of his attention. He pressed his lips against the leaky head, opening them leisurely until he took it in. Artorius’ whole body jolted at finally being inside that perverse mouth and when Shigure started sucking rhythmically, his hand took a deadly, forceful grip on Shigure’s hair, pulling him slightly to the left with the suddenness of the movement.

“Sorry,” he whispered, letting go of it.

But Shigure, still sucking, took Artorius’ hand and put it back on his hair. He then swirled his tongue around the head and with a strained groan Artorius couldn’t help pushing him down on his dick.

The worst about it was how easily Shigure took him. He adjusted immediately opening his mouth wider and flattening his tongue, as if he had been expecting Artorius to do just that. Perhaps he had.

“Oh…” Artorius sighed and kept pushing him down.

Shigure took it splendidly, until his nose was buried in Artorius’ pubic hair and the tip of his dick was deep in his throat. Shigure moaned as loudly as he could and the reverberation it sent across his dick made Artorius bucked upwards, his hold on the other becoming more vicious.

Shigure was still holding his hips too, his fingers grazing ever so lightly the exposed flesh he found over the hem of Artorius’ clothes. For some reason that was driving him as crazy as the blowjob.

After a moment there Shigure withdrew, slow, barely moving his head at all, as if asking for permission to do so. Artorius allowed it but didn’t retire his hand. Shigure pulled out completely, took a deep breath and dived in again, all the way to the base. He continued doing that, every time adding a little more speed and Artorius had the absurd thought he was showing off. Perhaps he was.

Shigure kept sucking him like that and it eventually become too much.

“Wait,” he called, breathless “I’m close,” he tried to warn “I…” his voice broke, the grip of his hand on Shigure’s hair hard and unmoving “Shigure, please…”

Shigure didn’t heed his words. All the contrary, he took him deep, moaned again and stayed there, breathing heavily against his pubic hair as if he was the one at the edge.

Artorius made a chocking sound, his hand urging Shigure to take more even though there wasn’t anymore to take, his hips bucking upwards. He tried again:

“Let go”, his voice was small and fragile, so different from the ever commanding voice of the Shepherd “Let go I’m gonna—“

But instead Shigure swallowed, the muscles of his throat tightening around Artorius and he lost it.

He cursed his right hand, unable to use it to quiet his voice. He bit his cheeks and shook violently trying to muffle his scream and ended up letting out a pitiful, drowned growl that hurt his vocal chords.

He closed his eyes, his head fell heavy on the backrest of the couch and for a moment there was nothing but the twitching of his cock deep in Shigure’s mouth and the white blankness of pleasure behind his eyelids.

Shigure retreated slowly and Artorius forced himself to look: He had swallowed it all. Dumbfounded he watched Shigure lick his red, wet lips and clean the corner of his mouth with the back of his hand, looking satiated and content, as if he had just eaten a delicious meal. Artorius felt his balls tighten.

“So, did that take your mind off work?” Shigure asked, all innocent looking between his legs.

What work? Artorius thought and blinked dumbly at him.

Shigure laughed, a crystalline, cheery sound that shouldn’t come out of someone capable of doing what he had just done with his mouth.

“I guess it did.” Shigure answered himself and got up in a swift, silent motion.

Artorius licked his lips, still lost in his post-orgasm daze, awaiting eagerly to see how much the whole encounter had affected Shigure. He was ready to offer to return the favor, the least he could do after the astounding blowjob the man had given him.

To his great disconcert and disappointment, Shigure didn’t seem to be hard. There was not obvious erection straining the fabric of his pants and aside from the blush still coloring his cheeks and a few strands of loose hair, nothing put in evidence what they had just done.

Artorius made a sound, like he wanted to say something, but he was still too far gone to put any coherent thought in words. Instead he did the reasonable thing and tucked his dick back into his clothes.

Shigure poured a glass a water from the jar at the desk and use it to wash his mouth. He spat it into a potted plant near the window.

There was silence while they composed themselves.

“Well, I’m gonna go hit the shower,” Shigure said after a moment, opening the curtains and letting the midday sun bath the room. “See you around.”

“I— I’ll see you around,” Artorius nodded, dazed.

Shigure snorted but still smiled at him, radiant, and left the room.

Artorius watched him go and, after a shaky sigh, sank on the couch. He looked at the desk and his pile of documents and parchments, and realized he had no idea what he was supposed to be doing with them.

Artorius felt the memory of their encounter breathing at his neck with a feverish breath that made him sickly warm.

Nothing changed in the way Shigure spoke to him, nor in the way Artorius treated him, but it was the little things that set his mind off. Shigure would leaned on his desk to tell him something, their arms would brush while they walked around the Villa, Shigure would stretch and show off his tempting body or he would laugh, resounding like the bells of the cathedral, or he would smile and light up the room with it and Artorius just—

He got lost in all of it. The answer to the question he was being asked delaying an instant; losing focus on the documents he read and having to reread a second, third time; his mind floating to the warm of Shigure’s mouth, the expertise of his tongue and his satisfied sounds in the middle of conversations and meetings.

It was infuriating. Artorius was a master of compartmentalization he should be able to hide this in a special corner of his mind and look at it when it was proper, not when Oscar was droning on his latest mission report.

He thought he knew, however, why it was so hard to forget about it and get on with his life.

After a long day of being unproductive because Shigure insisted on touching him (casual, innocent taps on the back, a hand on his shoulder, the brush of fingers when they both reached for an apple at lunch), Artorius caught himself doing the only logical, reasonable thing one could do when being presented with such a dilemma.

He was laying on his bed, after his night routine, and his hand, almost like it was someone else’s, like he wished it was someone else’s, slipped through his abdomen over the fine satin of his nightclothes until it reached the edge of his pants and sneaked inside.

Masturbation was not a common habit of his, and precisely because of that he tried to keep it slow and drag it out, enjoy the moment and perhaps, after he showed himself that he could come just as fine on his own, perhaps he would stop lingering on the shadow of Shigure’s touch.

It didn’t go like that.

While he stroked himself, spreading the little drop of precum over his length, digging his heels on the mattress and rising his hips to fuck his fist, he thought of Shigure: of the way his hands had spread over his tights, of his mouth and his tantalizing tongue, of the brushing of his fingers on his hips and the way he had looked at him, full of respect and admiration and delight, so happy to be between his legs and make him squirm.

He was panting, his eyes close, and soon, when the recollections were not enough, his mind supplied him with scenarios that would later chase him in the same way the memories had. He imagined that Shigure didn’t make him come with his mouth, but instead that Artorius stopped him on time and made him straddle his hips, that he touched Shigure’s chest, that he sucked and nibbled at the exposed flesh, that Shigure trembled for him.

He imagined Shigure was painfully hard under his clothes, noticeable even on his baggy pants, that Artorius took out his dick and fondled both of them together until they came. He imagined that Shigure said, against his ear, in a weak, pleading voice, he imagined he said his name.

Artorius came with an explosion that had him whining, his lips a painful white line that stopped him from screaming his lungs out. While the waves of pleasure rolled off him and he opened his eyes, the last remnants of the fantasy scurrying away, he came to the heart of the problem.

Shigure, the real one, had not been hard. He had been content enough with giving him pleasure and dashing out of the room. The behavior raised a number of alarming questions, because if he wasn’t getting off on sucking his dick, why did he do it in the first place?

Was it simply an unorthodox way of helping Artorius relieve stress? Was he just trying to be a useful subordinate? At the end of the day he didn’t know everything about the Rangetsu Clan, it may as well be a normal thing to offer to your boss.

Was it some kind of wicked power play, because if he couldn’t best him as a swordsman now he had this over him? That didn’t seem right, Shigure had honor, after all.

Or maybe Shigure liked sucking dick, maybe he got off on it but Artorius just, didn’t do it for him?

The thought hurt his ego more than he liked. It shouldn’t matter because at the end of the day Shigure had sucked him off and looked satisfied while doing it, but Artorius couldn’t let it go.

Because he wanted Shigure, he desired him, and now that the bastard had gone and ignited the dormant lust he felt for him, now he wanted Shigure to feel the same.

He went to sleep with these disturbing thoughts and dreamed that Shigure fucked him.

(He wouldn’t, thankfully, remember the details in the morning).

The whole matter reached the peak of its ridiculousness when, after two weeks of Artorius spacing out and falling behind schedule, Melchior confronted him about it.

“Artorius, may I have a word with you?” the old Legate had said after a meeting.

The delay on his answer was obvious for everyone in the room but who could blame him, really, when Shigure had stretched like a cat and groaned in satisfaction because the briefing was finally over?

“Yes, of course,” he said hastily, dropping again on his chair with the grace of a hippopotamus.

Oscar, Teresa and Shigure too, eyed him curiously, but left the room without comment.

Once they were alone Melchior reclined on his chair, at the other side of the long, twelve places table, and intertwined his hands over his belly, giving Artorius a questioning look.

“What’s the matter?” Artorius asked, still blissfully unaware of the other intentions.

“I’ve notice you appear to be…” Melchior left the sentence hanging for a moment, like there wasn’t an appropriate word to name what Artorius had been “preoccupied.” He chose finally.

Artorius blinked.

“I’m tired,” he said, perhaps a little too quickly “since my trip to Eastgand and Southgand I haven’t been able to rest properly.”

Melchior hummed and then started caressing his long beard, deep in thought, his gaze deviating somewhere behind Artorius.

Artorius waited for him to say something else, his throat dry, he hadn’t been that obvious had he? He was also a master of deception, could Shigure and his sinful mouth have made him fail at that too?

“I’ve notice too,” Melchior continued, bringing his eyes back to Artorius, like he hadn’t hear his previous answer “that you seem preoccupied, especially, with Shigure.”

“I— excuse me?” Artorius said, his voice tight, like there was a noose around his neck, one that he had tied himself. This couldn’t be happening.

Melchior nodded, solemn.

“Your eyes linger on him whenever he’s around and you seem inclined to spend more time with him as of late, you didn’t usually have lunch with him before, did you?”

Artorius tried to answer but Melchior raised a hand with his palm open to silence him.

“I’ve come to the conclusion that you have a sexual interest in him. Is that correct?”

Artorius felt the noose tightening, his tongue was suddenly made of lead, his mouth dry like a dead tree.

“I…” He tried to start, licking his lips in attempt to easy the word’s way.

He wasn’t sure of what he wanted to say. Lying seemed like a waste of time at this point but he couldn’t just admit to Melchior that yes, indeed, I’ve been lusting after my good for nothing bodyguard since he sucked my dick at my office, didn’t I mention how proficient he is?

“I know I’ve been distracted,” he decided to say at the end “I will not let this to interfere with my work anymore.” 

“And how do you plan on doing that?” Melchior shot back, an eyebrow arching in question “I assume that’s what you’ve been trying to do, I can’t imagine you would simply indulge on such thoughts.”

What thoughts?! He wanted to ask defensively. As far as he knew Melchior’s abilities didn’t include mind reading so he felt very aggravated at what the older man could be imagining his thoughts to be.

Then again, Melchior was right. He had been trying to keep the thoughts and the fantasies and the feelings away, but he couldn’t do it, not with Shigure so close to him all the time and—

Perhaps that was what Melchior was trying to make him see, that Shigure’s proximity was a problem, that he should send Shigure far away, post him in some faraway place where he couldn’t distract The Shepherd from his duties. The idea tasted bitter.

“Will you hear my advice on the matter?” Melchior said, pulling him out of his suddenly depressing musing.

Artorius sighed.

“Yes.”

Melchior looked at him straight in the eye and said, with the utmost seriousness:

“Sleep with him.”

Artorius almost choked on his spit but controlled the abrupt coughing fit with deep, measured breaths. That was not what he expected the other to say.

“Pardon?” He was not blushing.

Melchior nodded wisely, uncaring of his reaction.

“The urges of the flesh are not a problem that will simply go away,” he started explaining with a professional air, like Artorius was a young pupil in need of a lesson on sex “I think it would be best to meet it head on and be done with it.”

“But—” but he doesn’t like me, Artorius thought, he sucked me off for god knows what reason but he doesn’t like me “it’s not that simple.”

  “It is,” Melchior corrected him “Shigure has a pure heart, and the reason for that is that he’s sincere. He doesn’t back away from the truth of his emotions or desires, he doesn’t lie to himself and he doesn’t lie to others. If you were to approach him with such intentions he would either reject you or comply, and there wouldn’t be nothing ambiguous about it.”

Artorius’ face lighted up with understanding, reaching a conclusion to the predicament that had been haunting him for two weeks

“If he rejects you,” Melchior continued “then it’s over and you can stop fantasizing about him,” Artorius wanted to hide under the table, just how much this man knew?! “but if he accepts you scratch that itch, and you can stop fantasizing about him.”

He didn’t remember the last time he was this embarrassed. Still, Melchior’s words ringed truth.

Shigure wouldn’t lie to him, it was in his very nature, so maybe the easiest solution to this whole mess was to ask him why, why he hadn’t been hard.

“I doubt he’ll turn you down, anyway,” Melchior added, conversational “if you weren’t too occupied ogling him, you would notice the way he looks at you.”

Artorius opened his mouth to retort, scandalized, but didn’t really have anything to say to that.

“I will think over your advice. Good afternoon.” was the only thing he dared to say and left the room in haste.

His schedule for the day had been packed with multiple meetings with the royal family, high-ranking Praetors, guild masters and some other city officials to keep spreading the Abbey’s influence. Artorius could stay focused through all of it. Mostly.

Shigure was there with him of course, he had to be. When he wasn’t in one of his so called training trips or dispatched to dispose of some especially strong daemon, his job was indeed to stand around and look pretty: Artorius didn’t need a bodyguard and having Shigure act as such was a display of power more than anything else.

Shigure, however, tended to get terribly bored in these kind of meetings, more so because he couldn’t pester Artorius as he usually did. Contrary to what one could believe Shigure was very good at keeping up appearances, and he knew how to behave like the underlying he ultimately was.

Artorius recognized the signs of his boredom through the day, caught him counting tiles, half reading some of the documents he had to sign, drumming his fingers on the hilt of his sword…all little, inconsequential acts that wouldn’t have drawn his attention weeks before. But now everything about Shigure beaconed to him and it was a problem.

His little slips during the meetings, even when Shigure was doing nothing, was just standing there, fed his conviction to put an end to this ridiculous affair once and for all.

After the last meeting, around seven in the evening, was done, Artorius went to his office with Shigure still trailing behind him.

“I don’t know how you tolerate those bastards,” Shigure spat like he had been holding the remark all day “the stick up their asses is so big I could almost see it coming out from their mouths.”

“You know how important it is to keep a good relation with all of them,” Artorius said, ignoring the crude comment.

“I know, I know…some of them are really asking for an ass kicking, though, High Priest Gideon talking about “fighting corruption” in the high ranks of the Abbey, the fucking nerve.”

Artorius stifled a laugh at Shigure’s rude, if accurate, appreciation of the man.

When they arrived to his office Artorius sat on his desk to finish some paperwork. He didn’t dismiss Shigure, even though there wasn’t any need to for him to be there anymore, and Shigure didn’t ask to excuse himself either. He sat at the opposite side of the desk and fumbled with some loose sheets of paper. Artorius left him be.

He was almost done with his work when a small, white paper frog jumped onto the parchment he was signing. Artorius raised his gaze and saw Shigure had been entertaining himself with origami. There were a crane, a fox and a butterfly in front of him. Shigure flashed him a smiled and, feeling the air leave his lungs and giving into some unknown, unfathomable urge, Artorius made the frog jump back to Shigure’s side of the desk.

Shigure smiled even bigger. Artorius blamed the gymnastic in his chest to his current predicament and returned his eyes to the parchment.

No more than ten minutes later he announced he was done. Shigure stood up at the same time as him, and Artorius looked at Shigure’s small paper zoo. He felt like asking about it, but caught sight of Shigure stretching, his arms over his head, displaying the well worked muscles of his torso and remembered some more pressing matters he had to ask about.

They left the office and, while Artorius put the lock on, he said:

“Shigure, I’d like a word with you, will you accompany to my bedroom?”

He turned to look at him. Shigure didn’t have time to hide his bafflement, tilting his head to the side and bilking dumbly a few times. Artorius waited for his answer somehow nervously, hoping he wouldn’t ask him why they couldn’t have discus whatever he wanted to say in his office, it was what he himself would’ve say.

“Sure,” Shigure said after a moment, shrugging “lead the way.”

Artorius nodded.

The walk to his bedroom was silent, marked by the encompassing tap of Artorius’ boots over the tiles and then the muffled sound at the carpeted sections. They encountered a few exorcist on the way, but no one did more than respectfully bow as they passed; as they neared the dormitory of the Villa less people was about, and when they finally made it to Artorius door, a room located in high tower where Shigure’s and Melchior’s abode was also located, the floor was deserted.

Artorius opened the door to his dwelling feeling increasingly anxious, but no emotion was betrayed by his steady hand as he signaled Shigure to enter.

The place was quite spacious and was divided in three sections: a lounge area, where they currently stood, the bedroom, and a bathroom. There was a row of four, long, narrow windows at the wall opposite of the door with moonlight entering through them; between the windows, the high ceiling, and the big arch that dived the lounge from the bedroom it was obvious the place hadn’t been design to be anyone’s quarters.

Artorius walked with a confidence he didn’t feel to the other side of the room and unbuckled his sword from his hips, putting the blade in the sword stand over the bureau under the windows. He seldom left his sword there, but felt the need to occupy himself with something.

When he turned around Shigure was following his lead, letting his sword rest on the couch with great care.

“So…” Shigure said, dragging the word and walking towards Artorius.

Right. Artorius nodded as if answering some question, looking solemn and not at all nervous, while a familiar, tightening sensation crept around his throat. He moved around again, turning on the lights in the living room. He turned on the ones in his bedroom too.

Shigure watched him in questioning silence, taking Artorius’ place near the bureau and lazily half sitting on it, crossing his arms over his chest.

   When Artorius finally returned to face him it was obvious Shigure was suspicious of him.

“Shigure,” Artorius began “I…I’d like to ask you something,” he said, like an idiot.

“I guessed as much,” Shigure answered “must be something important if we need to discuss it here.”

Artorius nodded again.

“It’s about what happened in my office a few weeks ago,” he said, keeping the date vague as if he hadn’t been counting the days since the fateful encounter.

“Oh,” Shigure said simply and after a brief pause gave him a toothy smile “guess you want an encore?” he dropped his crossed arms and leaned seductively on the dresser, licking his lips while keeping eye contact.

Artorius kept his face carefully blank, but knew he was blushing. He couldn’t believe how easy this seemed to Shigure, almost envied his boldness, even after what they had done, after what Artorius had been imagining them doing, he couldn’t keep up with it.  

“That’s not exactly why I called you here,” Artorius decided to say.

Shigure frowned and his disposition changed completely, going from lazy sensual to guarded as he stood straight and put a hand on his hip.

“Then what do you want?” Shigure asked.

Not letting himself be dissuaded by Shigure’s sudden rudeness, knowing it was him making him wary, Artorius took a deep breath and did what Melchior had suggested and what he knew was the best way to go about: simply ask.

“I just want you to answer something.” Artorius said, still not done with the preambles, because he knew how this was gonna make him look, knew it was pathetic and ridiculous and definitely not worth of all the tension filling the room at the moment.

“I’m listening,” Shigure pressed.

Artorius sighed dramatically and, making an effort to look at Shigure in the eye, finally asked:

 “Why weren’t you hard? After you blew me?”

Shigure’s face deserved to be painted and put in a museum. His eyes blew open, his eyebrows chase after his hairline, his mouth hang open with utter bewilderment.

And then he shattered the pressure in the room with his laughter, putting his hands on his face to hide behind. He laughed long and hard, hysterical even and his face was redder than it had been that day in his office. Artorius felt like going outside and burying himself in the Villa’s gardens, to never be seen again. He was blushing, and his mouth was dry with mortification, but he didn’t stop looking at Shigure, awaiting patiently for him to finish laughing at him.

“That’s…” Shigure started between laughs “that’s, actually a funny story.” But he wasn’t looking at Artorius anymore and despite his laugh he didn’t seem to find it funny at all.

Artorius didn’t miss the way his eyes darted to the floor, the way he slowly took a hand behind his head to nervously stroke his nape. He was embarrassed too.

“Perhaps…” he added, quieter as his hysterics finally died down and the tension in the room returned tenfold “pathetic would be a better word.”

Artorius squinted at him, puzzled by his behavior, more so that he had been with the mystery that had consumed for weeks.

“Will you tell me?”

“I’d rather not,” Shigure answered immediately.

Artorius nodded, though there was a disappointed grimace in his face.

“But, if you really, really want to know…” Shigure added at seeing his expression.

It killed him a little, the openness in Shigure’s eyes when offering him the truth even when he didn’t want to share it. It made him worry even more about his possible reasons to give him a blowjob.

“No,” Artorius said, deciding his curiosity and hurt ego were not worth it, not if it made Shigure looked like that “if you don’t want to tell me, it’s all right. Just answer this for me instead.”

“Yes,” Shigure lighted up straightaway, happy to leave the awkward subject behind.

“Why did you offer to blow me in the first place?” Artorius asked, very seriously, in the same business like voice he used to ask Shigure about his missions reports.

“Because I wanted to.” Shigure deadpanned.  

“Yes, but why? I mean…” Artorius sighed, this was The question “is it because you wanted me? Because you like me like that? Because you desired me or for some other reason.”

“Well, yes, because I like you, because I wanted to be with you like that, what other reasons could I have to do that?” Shigure retorted, incredulous “is there any other reason to suck dick?”

Artorius let out a shaky laugh despite himself as days and weeks of worries finally washed away. Discussions of the erection-that-was-not-there aside, this was what Artorius needed to hear to be at peace with himself and with Shigure at last.

“Okay,” Artorius said “thank you for answering.”

“That’s all?” Shigure asked then, furrowing his brow “you called me to your room in the middle of the night just for that?”

“Well, I’ve been preoccupied with the matter,” Artorius answered him, Shigure deserved honesty too “I just…since you didn’t seem to enjoy what we did as much as me, physically I mean, I was worried there could be some other reason for you to do it.”

“I mean…there’s an explanation for that,” Shigure said “and it’s not your fault if you’re worried about that I was just—” he shook his head, embarrassed again.

“You don’t have to tell me,” Artorius told him with a reassuring smile.

Shigure sighed deeply.

“Right. Just know it wasn’t your fault, or because I didn’t find you attractive or something, because…” He made a pause, thinking about something “because I want you, Artorius, you have no idea how much.”

The sincerity of his words punched Artorius in the gut, taking his breath away.

“And my offer still stands,” Shigure changed the atmosphere with his sultry tone and the way he made sure of displaying his body even as he simply leaned on the bureau again “if you want an encore, I’m all for it.”

Artorius didn’t think twice about it. He walked towards and cornered Shigure against the cabinet. Shigure half sat on it, his hands at each side of him, leaning on the wood, giving Artorius free reign to do what he pleased with him.

It was the middle of the night and if nothing short of a daemon the size of the cathedral knocking at the city’s gates came up, no one would look for them. They had the whole night to do whatever they pleased, they were in Artorius’ room, safe and closed off from the world.

Artorius stood between Shigure’s opened legs, but not close enough to actually touch him. Shigure was following his every move and it seemed like his skin flared up with just Artorius tracing his gaze over him.

There was no rush when Artorius raised his hand and with his index finger touched lightly on Shigure’s jaw. Shigure’s breath hitched. He reached for his lower lip and very so slightly traced it. He was compensated with Shigure’s tongue slipping outside, just a bit, to give him a lick.

“Take off my glove,” Artorius said, low “with your teeth.”

Shigure didn’t need to be told twice. He took Artorius finger on his mouth and suck on it, trying to get a grip on the cloth. When he finally did Artorius helped him by withdrawing his hand.

The glove hung for a moment between Shigure’s lips but then he let it fall and ran across his chest and his groin, in the same path Artorius wanted to follow, before reaching the floor.

Artorius put his finger on Shigure’s lips again, but when the other made an attempt to take it he let his hand fall to his jaw, then his neck, where he felt the bob of his apple as the other gulped, and then further down. He spread his whole hand on his chest, relishing the feeling of finally touching him, after so long of just admiring for afar. He couldn’t help cupping a bicep and giving it a firm squeeze, enjoying the feeling of the soft flesh. Moving further down he made sure of grazing a nipple and was ecstatic to see the skin flare up with goosebumps. He continued, feeling the tightening on Shigure’s abs when he removed slightly, and then stop, at the hem of his pants.

“Undo these for me,” Artorius ordered again, almost without noticing.

Shigure undid the knots of his clothing, the pants now hanging a little loose over his hips and then put his hands on the cabinet again. Artorius wasn’t sure what the obedience meant but he was ready to take full advantage…at least as long as Shigure seemed to be enjoying it.

He slipped his hand inside, caressing the coarse hair, feeling the humid warmness of the area and finding out, triumphant, that Shigure was already half hard. He raised his gaze and made eye contact with Shigure as he took his dick a firm grip. Shigure made a sharp intake of air, holding his gaze.

Artorius stroked him, almost contemplative, not losing details of Shigure’s expression as he felt him grew in his hand. Shigure closed his eyes for time to time and then seemed to force himself to return Artorius’ gaze; he licked his lips and let his mouth hang open and gasped when Artorius used his thump to trace a bulging vein on his dick.

When he was finally fully hard, Artorius took out his hand. Shigure sighed, closing his eyes again.

“You said you wanted me,” Artorius said then “show me.”

Shigure opened his eyes and looked straight at him. He took some long, measured breaths, trying to compose himself and then closed the distance between them. In a slow, conscientious movement Shigure put a hand in Artorius’ cheek and then dragged it to his neck, where he took a fistful of his hair.

“You,” Shigure said then, like he was choking on the word, his breath dancing over Artorius’ lips, “you have no idea what you’re doing to me.”

He pulled his head back, Artorius gasped at the suddenness of it and then he had Shigure’s mouth over his, his tongue making its way inside.

Shigure’s other hand went to the small of his back, bringing him closer so his hardness rubbed against Artorius’ crotch, where his own dick was also responding in kind.

He hooked his arm around Shigure’s neck and answered the advances with the same hunger Shigure was displaying. It downed on him that they had already touched each other in far more intimates ways, and this kiss was somehow the most innocent gesture that had transpired between them, even if there was nothing innocent in the intentions behind it.

Artorius felt Shigure’s hand scooting lower and the firm squeeze he gave to his ass made him moan into the other’s mouth. Shigure bucked his hips at the sound and then, still kissing him dropped the hand in his hair to take him by the back of his thighs and lifted him up. Artorius held to his neck, perhaps a little too rudely, and had to lean his weight in Shigure’s chest to keep his balance.

Shigure didn’t seem to mind and held him easily. He crossed the room, taking them to the bedroom and threw Artorius in the mattress, making him bounce a little, and then climbed on the bed too. He cornered Artorius with his knees at each side of him, a hand to hold himself on the bed and the other pinning Artorius’ hand over his head.

He trashed against the hold, the vulnerability of the position making his gut twist. He was now at the mercy of a man that had expressed, more than once and with great enthusiasm, that wanted to kill him. It was instinct more than anything making him resist.

But Shigure’s intents couldn’t be further away from his desire to beat him as a swordsman and soon enough he was kissing him again, like he wanted to steal his breath away. Artorius relaxed into it and decided they were still wearing too much for this.

He turned his head to the side, to free his mouth and speak, which still wasn’t an easy task, not with Shigure continuing his assault on his neck.

“There’s…” Artorius shuddered “there’s lube in the drawer.”

Shigure groaned at his words.

“Is that what you want?” he asked against his ear, his breath hot “do you want me to fuck you?”

“Yes,” Artorius answered without delay, unashamed now of the desire he felt for the other “that’s what I want that’s…that’s what I need.”

Shigure groaned again and then got up, so fast it would seem he was running away, and went for the drawer where Artorius had conveniently put the bottle of lube in plain sight earlier tonight. Just in case.

Artorius kicked off his boots and started undoing his pants, his usually dexterous left hand felt clumsy on the familiar task as he tried to hurry up.

The other was soon back with him at the feet of the bed, lube bottle in hand. Contrary to all reasonable course of action, he threw the bottle on the bed.

“Wait,” he called, watching as Artorius successfully undid his pants and tried to wiggle out of them “wait a second. If we’re doing this, we’re doing it right.”

Artorius raised his gaze in question, not seeing how taking off his pants was not the right thing to do in this scenario.

Shigure took off his gloves and his sorry excuse of a shirt, and went to sit by Artorius. He grabbed him by the shoulders.

“Takes this off,” he said, quietly, taking a fistful of his shirt.

Artorius hesitated. With his right arm, limp and useless in the arm sling, that was going to be more trouble that it was worthy and he was afraid the time it would take could ruin the momentum they had going.

“C’mon,” Shigure encouraged “I’ll help.”

Shigure reached for the fastenings at Artorius wrist, the ones that held the string that crossed his chest, and opened it. His arm would’ve half fallen heavily on his lap without the support, but Shigure held it and carefully laid it down. The he took him by the elbow with one hand and with the other gripped the sling. He pulled in opposite directions to free his arm.

Artorius thought he seemed awfully familiar with the particulars of the task and wondered about his experience on the matter, if had ever broken an arm or if he had taken care of someone.

His ruminations didn’t last long, Shigure was soon kissing him again, while his hands messed with the numerous buttons and hidden clasps of his outfit. He held onto Shigure’s shoulder, feeling vulnerable in a strange way with his right arm just laying there in his lap, the dead weight a constant reminder of something else he had lost that night and one he had learn to ignore when it was held securely against his chest.

When his shirt was open, Shigure slip his hands inside, feeling up his chest and then rolled the cloth off his shoulders.

“It would be best I put the sling back on,” Artorius said the moment the shirt fell from his body.

It wasn’t a cold night and the temperature in his room was always comfortably warm, but his pale skin was prickling with goosebumps.

He wouldn’t say he was self-conscious about his appearance but he was aware of the difference between his arms. He know that the thinness, fragility of the right one was evident, the softness of the disused muscles contrasting with the rest of his chest and his other arm. He was afraid it would deviate Shigure’s attention.

His attention was indeed caught by it and Artorius felt an ugly, unfamiliar feeling coiling in his gut: insecurity.

He didn’t’ particularly resent the loss of his right arm, it had been a hassle the first years, learning a way of life that involved maneuvering around it, becoming left handed, re learning how to fight and eat and dress and do everything with his less skilled hand, but he was at peace with it. He wasn’t in peace at all with the way some people would look at him. The pity and the curiosity usually subdued the moment he started talking but right now Shigure was stripping him of the literal armor he wore every day to make the world forget he was something more, something less than the Shepherd.

He followed Shigure’s gaze with dread but found it wasn’t resting on his shoulder, where the difference in mass was more obvious. He was looking at his hand, still wearing his glove.

Shigure took his hand in his and peeled the fabric away. In that moment Artorius felt almost offended by his right arm: Shigure’s touch looked worshipful and he couldn’t feel it.

Shigure reached for the sling again, slipped Artorius’ arm inside and when his hand came out of the other side he did something Artorius couldn’t have been prepared for. He raised it and, looking at Artorius with a smile and something else, something soft, shinning in his eyes, kissed his knuckles.

For the first time since any of this had started Artorius had to look away, his face blooming with a sudden blush that made his skin itch. He, obviously, didn’t feel it, but at this point he was perhaps too familiar with Shigure’s mouth and could imagine how it would’ve feel, his soft lips and his searing warm. It was too much.

He was afraid Shigure would laugh at his reaction or say something stupid but the other man stayed blissfully silent and finished up securing the straps over his shoulder and around his chest.

“Okay?” He asked.

Artorius knew he was referring to the sling but it...didn’t feel like that at all.

He nodded curtly and turned to face him again, still flustered but determinate to continue where they had left. He curled his arm around Shigure’s neck and fell on the bed with the other on top. He kissed him and opened his legs, hooking them around Shigure’s waist to bring him closer. He felt the other’s hardness and raised his hips to rub against it, trying to get the most of the contact, desperate to overwhelm himself with the sensation and forget about the way Shigure had kissed his hand.

Shigure answered with the same intensity and for Artorius delight he took his hands at the edge of his pants and pulled them down. Artorius raised his hips to help him and soon enough he was naked under the other. Shigure’s hands traveled over his legs and tights, purposely missing his groin. Then he got up and stared at Artorius with lust darkening his eyes. And something else.

He opened his mouth as if to say something but stop himself and instead got rid of his pants too.

Artorius let out a shuddering breath at the sight. Shigure was well endowed, as he had felt before, but finally seeing his rock hard dick, the red flushed head, the precum at the tip, it made his chest tighten with anticipation. He found himself wanting to take it his mouth, trace the bulging vein at the side with his tongue, make Shigure feel the same debilitating pleasure he had delivered weeks ago.

He couldn’t help taking his hand to his own dick and give himself a few good strokes, trying to relieve some of the building fire that had pooled in his lower belly and dared to consume his entrails if he didn’t do something about it.

“Fuck, Artorius,” Shigure said then, out of breath, like the image of Artorius jerking off in front of him had punched him in the gut.

He was soon on the bed with him again and batted Artorius’ hand away, taking him on his own with long, measured rubs. Artorius threw his head back and while Shigure took advantage of that to nibble at his neck, he probed around the bed with his hand, looking for the bottle of lube that Shigure had so hastily disregarded before.

He found it and shoved it in Shigure’s chest. The other stop his ministrations to look at what Artorius was doing.

“Don’t make me wait any longer,” Artorius said, his voice strained.

Shigure swallowed and stopped jerking him off. He took the bottle from Artorius and sat on his heels, looking down on Artorius, who gulped nervously too.

“Can you…” Shigure’s voice was deep and husky, he cleared his throat “can you turn around for me?”

Artorius nodded and did so. He reached for the pillows to put them under his right shoulder and help support him where his arm couldn’t, he adjusted one there and use the other to sink his head in it, planting his chest on the mattress and keeping his ass high in the air. He opened his legs.          

Shigure cursed behind him again. Artorius buried his face in the pillow, hugging it close to him with his left arm, embarrassed but eager. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply.

He felt the cold, wet lube slipping over his ass crack, since Shigure had apparently decide to just pour it on him. Then Shigure’s hands were on each on his cheeks, he fondled them and squeezed them, making Artorius shudder. He then separated them just to rub them together again, the stickiness of the lube making a wet sound every time.

Artorius could only imagine the sight he was at the moment, his legs open and his dick hanging hard and leaking between them, the lube dripping from his crack, the clear view Shigure must had of his hole…it was mortifying to think about it, but the indignity of it was also arousing.

Shigure stopped playing with his cheeks, giving them a last good squeeze, and then Artorius felt his hand going up and down his crack, slipping easily thanks to the lube, touching his hole almost like an afterthought.

He would’ve whined if he hadn’t his face buried in the pillow. He wanted Shigure to hurry up and prepare him, he wanted to feel the dick he had been fantasying about for weeks finally inside him, but at the same time he was enjoying all the preambles, it was the best kind of torture.    

Still, he couldn’t help pressing against Shigure’s hand, quietly asking for more. Shigure obliged. He circled the tight ring of muscles with one finger and soon slipped it inside. The intrusion was minimal, it wasn’t the whole finger yet, but Artorius hadn’t done this in a very long time and the feeling was foreign and, if not painful, uncomfortable. It made him doubt of his capability of actually taking Shigure but he wanted it so bad and he was so turned on for all they had been doing that, contrary to his first instinct, he pressed his ass again against the other.

But Shigure didn’t seem as eager, or at least had more self-control. He didn’t hurry at Artorius’ insistence and focused on working him open with patience and care, drawing circles inside him until he could put his whole finger inside with no resistance and fucked him slowly with it.

That felt good and when Artorius started rocking his hips, Shigure added a second finger. The slight discomfort soon subsided when Shigure curled his fingers and scissor them. He made Artorius moan into his pillow when his other hand, also slick with lube, joined to rub at his balls and the sensitive skin of his perineum.

He wasn’t sure how much time passed but he was panting and felt the need of release creeping closer and closer, and even if it felt good he didn’t want to come to this. He raised his head and tried to speak.

“I...I won’t…last…”

“Shh,” Shigure soothed him, his voice quiet and gentle, and then he added a third finger “hold on a little while longer okay? Please?”

Artorius was a shuddering mess already but if Shigure was saying please then he could try to hold on. He breathed deeply and let his head fall again.

After some more time of gentle finger fucking, Shigure finally took off his hand. He poured more lube over Artorius and then he rubbed his length against his crack. His dick felt heavy and so hot, about to burst too.

Shigure sank inside, taking a hold of Artorius hips to keep him in place, slowly. When the head made it in both of them were moaning and shivering. Thanks to the prep he could kept going until he was buried completely inside Artorius. Shigure pressed his chest against his back, and Artorius felt his panting breath against his ear, could almost feel his thundering heartbeat.

“Tell me,” Shigure said then, with a shaky voice “tell me when I can move.”

“Now,” Artorius said with hesitation “now, please…”

“Fuck!”

Shigure jolted at his words and he did start moving, slowly building up a rhythm that, Artorius knew, could get brutal at any moment. He loved it and rocked his hips back to encourage the other. This is what he wanted, what he had been dreaming about, feeling Shigure so hard inside of him, the delicious stretch of his entrance, Shigure kissing his shoulders as he fucked him—

He felt the bed sinking at his side as Shigure put his hands on it to better support his weight. He started going harder and Artorius was grateful for the pillow he was still hugging to his face, muffing the sounds coming from him, because there was just so many indignities he could bear tonight. He was so not going to last.

“Do you...?” Shigure started saying suddenly, the bed creaking under the force of his thrusts “do you want to know why I wasn’t hard? Back in your office?”

“H—huh?” Artorius could hardly said, turning his head as much as possible without rising it from the pillow, to listen to the answer to the enigma that had been chewing him up from weeks.

He could barely see Shigure’s face in this position, but still got a glimpse of his flushed face, noticed the sweat on his brow and his clenched teeth. He looked so good.

 “It’s because,” Shigure’s voice was strained, coming between ragged breaths “I was hard, I got hard, the moment I was on my knees, god I was so hard and I— I was so looking forward to—”

Artorius clenched around him, his climax creeping closer. Shigure stopped then and closed his eyes, breathing deeply and carefully. Moments later he resumed his thrusting at a slower, more controlled pace. Artorius almost whined at the lost. 

“But I had wanted you for so long,” Shigure continued saying, right next to his ear “I had dream about it for so long, what, what would you taste like, what you would sound like, fuck, it turned me on so much, seeing you squirm, the way you tried to don’t scream…and then…” Shigure gulped and calmed himself with measure breaths again, Artorius noticed his arm trembling but he didn’t stop fucking him, “and then you said my name, you said my name and said please, Shigure and I couldn’t take it, I came, right in my pants, I haven’t even touch myself but just hearing you came undone like that, fuck Artorius it was—“

It was the hottest thing Artorius had ever heard. His brain could barely process the words but it was— to think that Shigure had wanted him that much, that Artorius simply had to call for him to make him come, he couldn’t take it and he needed to come right.now.

“Touch me,” he said, he begged, incoherent, absolutely lost in the sensations “touch me, Shigure, touch me, please, please Shigure, touch me—”

Shigure grabbed his dick and jerked him off at the same pace that his thrusts and Artorius came so hard, he screamed into his pillow, and clenched around Shigure. It was like a curse had been lifted or like a storm had suddenly broken, like the world was ending or like it was beginning. Everything that wasn’t the pleasure expanding through his body came out of focus, like he wouldn’t be able to see if he opened his eyes, and the sounds Shigure was making got lost in the bright haziness of his mind.  His tights trembled and his balls tightened as his dick shot cum all over his bed, his ribcage barely containing his hammering heart.

At the midst of his orgasm Shigure kept fucking him, but his movements were erratic and his thrusts shallow, and he was only moments behind Artorius when he came too, spending himself inside, which was fine with Artorius, hadn’t Shigure so gracefully swallowed his cum before, after all?

He couldn’t hold himself anymore so Artorius let his hips fall into the bed, feeling Shigure’s dick slip out of him with a wet, obscene sound. He stayed there, limp over the bed as he tried to breath normally again.

Shigure fell in top of him and kissed his shoulders gently. He stayed there for a moment, composing himself and then rolled to lay on his back. Artorius turned around too and looked at the ceiling.

He felt terribly tired but at peace, with himself and with Shigure. The braces of the arm sling had dug in the skin of his shoulder, leaving angry red marks behind, and he started taking it off with practiced ease.

“I…” he heard Shigure said at his side “I’m going to the bathroom.”

Artorius made an affirmative sound. The bed shifted as Shigure got off of it and soon Artorius was alone in the room, hearing the quiet sound of the running sink. When he got the sling off he unceremoniously threw it on his night table where it slipped onto the ground. He didn’t bother to go pick it up.

He was suddenly very sleepy and it was tempting to simply roll under the covers and drift off, but he was filthy. He was covered in sweat and he could feel Shigure’s cum dripping out of him, dirtying the bedspread that he would need to change before anyone even thought of sleeping in that bed.

Shigure was back quickly. He had washed his face and dick, and was currently using a small wet towel to clean up his chest of the sweat.

“Hope you don’t mind,” he said to Artorius, throwing him a towel too.

Artorius caught it and swept his face with it. It was tempting too, to just use that to clean himself and call it a day, but he forced himself to get up. He needed to go to the bathroom.

He walked past Shigure without looking at him and wasn’t sure himself at all if that had been intentional or not.

He supposed some awkwardness was inevitable. It wasn’t like they were in any sort of relationship and despite Artorius’ planning of the situation it had still been pretty sudden.

Beside there were also these gestures Shigure had had during the encounter. It hadn’t been easy to ignore them at the time, even with the more pressing matters at the moment and while Artorius washed his face and looked at the mirror above the sink, it certainly wasn’t easy to downplay them either.

There hadn’t been any need for Shigure to be so…so sweet. Artorius wouldn’t have complain if he had simply threw him into the bed and fucked him, but Shigure had decide to go slow and gentle, and what about the matter with the arm sling? Artorius blushed again just thinking about it, remembering the softness in Shigure’s amber eyes, the way he had kiss his hand so reverently. He rubbed the spot Shigure had kissed, feeling nothing, of course and finding himself wishing, for the first time in years perhaps, to be able to.

He sighed deeply. He cleaned himself as best and as fast as he could and then went out of the bathroom.

Back in the room he found Shigure sitting on the bed, the bedcover had been removed and tossed somewhere, though it hadn’t been replaced, probably because Shigure didn’t know where he kept the bedclothes and wouldn’t want to pry around his room.

Shigure had already dressed and was adjusting his sandals when Artorius came in. He lifted his gaze and smiled at him. It looked a little dimmer than his usual smiles.

“You may stay,” Artorius heard himself say before he could think it through “if you wish to spend the night here, with me, you may stay.”

He walked to the bed and got on it, not wanting to see the way Shigure’s face lit up. Shigure didn’t move for a few moments but then he sprang up and started getting off his clothes again.

Shigure slipped at his side with a content sigh.

“How do you sleep, usually?” Shigure asked him.

“On my left side, or on my back,” Artorius answered “I don’t move around much.”

Tonight he decided to lay on his back and when he adjusted the pillows (he made sure to give Shigure the one he hadn’t hugged to his face, that one was filled with drool), and rested his head, Shigure got comfortable by wrapping himself around Artorius, his head on his chest.

“Is this okay?” he asked him, hearing Artorius sharp intake of air.

“I—” Artorius said, quiet, looking intently at the ceiling “it is.”

It was very different touching Shigure’s body like this. Both of them were naked, he could feel the firm muscles of his chest pressing against him, his limp dick at the side of his hips, but instead of getting the lust rush it would’ve given him before, Artorius found himself simply enjoying the other’s warm.  It even felt more intimate that everything they had done before, and it got his heart racing. He hoped Shigure couldn’t feel it but he probably could, in this position.

The sleepiness that had fallen over him decide to conveniently leave the room. Shigure didn’t say more and sighed, he seemed ready to go to sleep himself and Artorius wondered how he could be so nonchalant about all of this, especially when the things he had said and done.

“Is it truth?” Artorius found himself saying “what you said about…what happened in my office?”

Shigure laughed, too high and strained to be natural, and Artorius couldn’t see his face like this.

“Well…yeah,” Shigure said, soft “I told you it was kinda of pathetic didn’t I?”

“No,” Artorius answered then “it…” it was really hot “I’m deeply flattered.” He settled instead.

Shigure laughed again.

“I didn’t want something like that happening again,” Shigure continued, his breath fluttering over Artorius’ chest “so I’ve been meditating a lot.”

Artorius hummed, a sudden thought pulling at the corners of his lips.

“So you’ve been thinking about me?”

“You have no idea,” Shigure snorted.

He thought about telling him the feeling was mutual, but Shigure could probably figure it out.     

“I think we should sleep now.” he said then, hoping that sleep would take him quickly and he wouldn’t have to think any more about any of this, about the fluttering in his chest, about the pit in his stomach, about Shigure “Goodnight.”

“Hmm, goodnight,” Shigure answered, smiling against this chest.

Artorius closed his eyes and did not dream.

He didn’t need to: the real thing was right at his side.