Chapter Text
Privately, I wondered if Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji’s wedding wasn’t better for having been rushed. Without a long lead-up to the ceremony, there was no time to prepare an expansive guest list. The families of both grooms attended—such as they were—and they reached out to a few good friends, like Nie Huaisang and Wen Ning.
Madam Yu and Lan Xichen, thoroughly defeated by the couple they’d been wrangling over, had lost the will to fight. Did Lotus Pier have any claim on Wei Wuxian? He’d do whatever he wanted, obviously. Could the Lan demand that he commit to following the disciplines, or wear sect colors, or renounce his loyalty to the Jiang? No point.
Madam Yu still tried to ruin her least favorite disciple’s special day. She cleared out his bedroom, sent all personal things things to Gusu, and then moved Lan Xichen into it when he arrived. Wei Wuxian spent the night before his wedding in his brother’s room, and got dressed there as well. She gave Wei Wuxian no say in the menu, refused to let him wear any heirloom jewelry (Lan Wangji bought new, to make up for it, but the rejection must have stung), and frequently reminding him that the marriage disrespected the memory of Jiang Fengmian, whom they ought still to be mourning.
She didn’t seem to understand how pathetic she seemed, the eager perpetrator of petty tyrannies, untouched by joy or—at the very least—relief.
In the end, neither groom arrived on a palanquin, neither wore a veil, and both donned robes of borrowed red silk, hastily tailored to fit. Jiang Yanli cried, and then Wei Wuxian cried, and then Jiang Cheng pretended not to cry, while all the Lan looked increasingly uncomfortable.
All but one, anyhow: Lan Wangji radiated smug satisfaction so intensely that getting anywhere near him felt voyeuristic.
To the surprise of exactly no one, the happy couple retired early.
From then on it was just a nice party. Wen Ning had brought Wen Qing—or, as I discovered after a brief conversation, she’d refused to let him attend alone, on the suspicion that he’d been baited into a trap.
I asked both the Wens about life on Dafan mountain. They discussed the trials of starting fresh in a new place, preparing the land for farming, convincing residents of nearby villages to trust the newly-arrived doctor with an alarming family name, skimping on meat so as not to overhunt the mountain and reduce populations of wild game for the next year.
A bit of fishing yielded a brief mention of Wen Ning’s adopted son, a-Yuan, which made my heart ache with a tangled mix of joy and sorrow.
I knew that the Wens wouldn’t be able to form a sect on Dafan mountain. They were too smart to invite the inevitable violent reprisal and, on top of it, didn’t have enough cultivators to try. So I suggested that, if little a-Yuan showed promise, I’d do my best to secure him an invitation to train with the Lan.
“That’s so kind of you,” Wen Ning said. “He’s such a smart little boy, and so good-natured—”
“But the future is uncertain,” Wen Qing cut in, petite and sharp and protective. “All of this is years in the future. It would be better to discuss such delicate matters after your marriage.”
“I won’t forget,” I promised.
Nie Huaisang fluttered his fan and drank too much. Nie Mingjue, after drinking too much, pulled me into a corner and said, “Zewu-Jun is the best man I know and if I find out that you aren’t appreciating him the way he deserves I will bury you.”
“What a good friend you are!” I exclaimed. I’d never gotten a shovel talk before, and I was kind of thrilled. Something for the bucket list.
Nie Mingjue squinted at me, confused by this response. “I don’t care that you’re woman. You’ve done the work of a man and now you can face consequences like a man. I’ll put you in an unmarked grave, do you understand?”
“Since you’ve already almost killed me once, I’m pretty sure I do.” I did my best impression of Lan Xichen’s political smile. “Luckily, that’s all in the past.”
I didn’t even know what I was going for there—but I did enjoy the slightly unnerved way that Nie Mingjue kept looking back over his shoulder as he walked away.
I was still smiling about it later, when Lan Xichen asked, “What’s made you so happy?”
“Nie Mingjue really cares for you,” I answered. “It’s sweet.”
“Sweet,” Lan Xichen repeated. “You might be the first person to ever say that about him.”
Eventually, the women caught some cue that it was time for us to make ourselves scarce—probably drunkenness among the men had reached a critical mass—and I excused myself for the night.
Early the next morning I ventured out into town and took a boat tour of the lakes, gliding over dark water with mist rising all around me—exquisite even though the lotuses weren’t in bloom. I tested my spice tolerance at the food stalls and ambled back to Lotus Pier on a cloud of vacation-induced contentment.
Wei Wuxian caught me almost as soon as I reached the main complex, hooking his arm through mine and coaxing me to dip my feet in the water with him.
“Guess what?” he prompted, once I’d got a few swishes in.
“Do I actually have to guess?”
“We can pretend you did. But you got it wrong, because you’ll never guess. Try harder next time, will you? I come up with these games and the least you could do is give it your best effort. After all we’ve been through together—”
“You bought a donkey,” I guessed.
“What would I do with a donkey?” Wei Wuxian asked.
“You’re pregnant.”
“I wish!”
“You’ve taken up the dizi.”
“A little—stop being creepy—anyway, what you have failed to guess is that, as a respectable married man, I have been specially selected to act as your chaperon.”
I cocked a skeptical eyebrow at him.
“I know! Apparently because I’m married to a man, it’s safe for me to chaperone women? Which seems a little strange to me, like didn’t it ever occur to anyone that—”
“You like both?” I supplied.
“Exactly!” He nodded emphatically. “And now that you’ve guessed that correctly, I can’t resist. It’s time travel, right? Your big secret? You’re a time traveler.”
My jaw dropped. I’d decided early on not to tell anyone, because I couldn’t imagine a scenario where I’d be believed. Why give myself the headache when, as it turned out, I didn’t need to? But I’d never considered the possibility that someone might guess.
“We’re going to be family!” Wei Wuxian urged. “Families tell one another these things! Share with your soon-to-be-didi.”
“Not exactly time travel,” I answered, which made Wei Wuxian whoop with triumph. “But you’re close.”
“Close? Maiden An, that’s not an answer, that’s a riddle. What’s like time travel but not time travel? I don’t know, explain.”
It took me a bit to come up with an answer that felt honest without opening up a whole cupboard full of inadequately-sealed canned worms. “There’s a lot I don’t understand, and what I can explain wouldn’t make much sense to you. The world I grew up in is about a thousand years away from our present. It’s really different.”
“A thousand years?” Wei Wuxian repeated. “People still care about us in a thousand years?”
I nodded.
He propped his chin on his hands, looking out over the water. “But probably not in a good way, huh? Since you came back to change things?”
“I don’t want to talk about the way things might have been.”
“That bad, huh?”
“At this point, it’s a little like describing a dream. Who cares? Just a waste of everyone’s time.”
“Sure, nice dodge, but I think we’d all care a lot if you’ve still got plans. Like, Wen Zhuliu, Jin Guangshan… anyone else on the list?”
“No.” The only villain left alive was Meng Yao. I would never underestimate him, but I also had no idea what he’d do in a world where his true nature had been exposed early and thoroughly. “There might only be one thing that I came here knowing, that still matters now. I admired the Wei Wuxian I read about in books a lot. Even though things have changed, I’d still trust you to tell right from wrong. So if you ever end up in a situation where you need help… ask me. I won’t care how it looks and I won’t ask for an explanation.”
Wei Wuxian’s eyes went wide. “You mean that.”
I nodded.
Wei Wuxian sighed and leaned back on his hands, one foot flicking up to send a plume of water out across the calm lake. “I’ve been lucky with my new family.”
“How long until we can call Lan Qiren shushu?”
Wei Wuxian cackled. “Wait, wait, we’ve gotten off the topic. Because now that I’m your chaperone, I’m going to be very strict! I’m going to make you follow all the rules!”
“I find that hard to believe,” I observed.
“That’s because I haven’t explained the rules. Are you ready? We’re going to go over them very carefully. No mistakes!”
I nodded. “I’m ready.”
“Rule number one: don’t get pregnant.”
I blinked.
“That’s really important,” Wei Wuxian added.
“I agree,” I assured him.
“That’s the main one.” He waggled his finger at me. “All the future brides of Gusu Lan are counting on you to follow it to the letter. How would you feel if you deprived them of my excellent chaperoning skills?”
“I think I’ve figured out why Lan Xichen chose you for this particular task,” I said wryly.
“What, that’s not enough for you? Okay, I’ve got more rules. How about rule number two: don’t get caught having sex!”
“Definitely worth adding to the list,” I agreed.
“It’s harder than it sounds,” he complained. “People tend to assume unmarried young gentlemen and ladies aren’t having sex, so they just barge in on you at the most inconvenient times. Whatever happened to privacy, huh?”
“It’s gone the way of the dodo,” I agreed mournfully.
“The what?”
“A dodo is a flightless bird that… has not gone extinct yet, wow. That ruins the idiom. I wish I could remember where they lived. They always look so cute in pictures.”
A shadow fell over us then, in the form of the Twin Jades. They resembled one another more than usual, which was saying something because their resemblance was always a bit uncanny. They were both dressed formally in shades of pale blue, the silver medallions on their forehead ribbons gleaming in the sun, tall and elegant and wearing expressions of extreme self-satisfaction.
“Lan Zhan!” Wei Wuxian scrambled to his feet. “Let’s go swimming.”
Lan Wangji’s radiant happiness dimmed just the slightest bit. He sent a beseeching glance at his brother.
Lan Xichen, to the surprise of Lan Wangji and no one else, answered, “What a wonderful idea. Wangji, you ought to take advantage of the warm waters here while you can.”
“Exactly!” Wei Wuxian grabbed Lan Wangji by the arm and began dragging him toward a canoe. “Besides, you promised, and Hanguang-Jun always keeps his promises.”
Lan Xichen took Wei Wuxian’s place on the pier, rucking his skirts up past his ankles so he could dip his feet as well.
“So Wei Wuxian is my chaperon?” I asked.
Lan Xichen smiled serenely.
I grinned. “Shameless.”
“I am not doing this”—he made a vague circle with his finger, encompassing the whole of Lotus Pier—“again. Would you rather wait six months?”
I shuddered. “I think I might die.”
Lan Xichen startled. “That’s… flattering?”
“The Sect Leader is as modest as ever,” I answered, almost straight faced.
Lan Xichen tsked at me and we fell silent, listening to the soft lapping of water against the wooden pier, the birdsong, the faint but unmistakable sound of Wei Wuxian crowing triumphantly in the distance. A good day, and I could only hope for more just like it.
FINIS
FADE TO BLACK
ROLL CREDITS
MONTAGE TIME
MAIDEN AN, pictured in Lan white attending her first cultivation class, surrounded by children half her size. Clumsily picking up a practice sword. Doing an excellent handstand and putting senior disciples to shame.
Voiceover: Maiden An became Madam Lan six months later at a simple yet crushingly elegant ceremony in Gusu. Everyone attending agreed that Lan weddings were the worst while also secretly vowing to copy the floral arrangements and music at their own wedding, or their children’s wedding, or their sibling’s wedding, depending.
LAN XICHEN, pictured in an extremely elaborate guan and ten different kinds of lace. B-roll of minor sect leaders whispering to one another about how Lan Xichen is the nicest guy they’ve ever met but also… they’re scared of him? Cut to Xichen dressed informally, helping his first child learn to walk while Madam Lan claps. Then Xichen in a duet with Wangji, both of them much older and still content.
Voiceover: Lan Xichen was briefly elected to the role of Chief Cultivator, at which he excelled. His efforts (and those of his wife) hastened war recovery efforts and kept the peace at a difficult time. Eventually, he stepped down to spend more time with his family.
WEI WUXIAN, pictured guzzling Emperor’s Smile in the jingshi while Lan Wangji fetches another jar from underneath the floorboard. Leading junior disciples on night hunts, causing a minor explosion while inventing new talismans, hiding in the back mountains with Madam Lan while they test a simple telescope.
Voiceover: Wei Wuxian gained renown as a high-level cultivator, ingenious inventor of items both magical and mundane (some of them surprisingly advanced!), and serial adopter of orphans. A seasoned warrior who never tired of following his husband ‘where the chaos is’, he could also frequently be found sneaking candy to the youngest Lan disciples even though he’d been told to stop so many times, making his husband carry him around Cloud Recesses even though he could perfectly well walk, and flying loop-de-loops for the fun of it.
LAN WANGJI, seated on a rock in the center of a pond with a magnificent yet also surprisingly quiet waterfall in the background, playing the guqin. Brushing Wei Wuxian’s hair by candlelight. Demonstrating sword forms for one of his (many, how did he collect so many?) children.
Voiceover: Lan Wangji never lost his ferocious reputation, but those who knew him—and the number grew surprisingly large as the years passed—never felt safer than in his presence, and never hesitated to turn to him for help or advice. A master of sword and music, he sparked in a new era of musical cultivation among the Lan, expanding and refining their repertoire of spiritual songs.
OTHERS
Pictured:
Wen Sizhui hitting it off with Lan Jingyi soon after his arrival in the Cloud Recesses, where he’d been sent to study cultivation.
Wen Qing in her prosperous surgery on Dafan Mountain, greeting a visiting colleague who’d come to learn from the most brilliant doctor of the age.
Jiang Yanli marrying Jin Zixuan in the most elaborately tacky wedding the cultivation world had ever seen. Everyone had a great time but no one returned home vowing to copy the floral arrangements or the music.
Madam Yu, returning to Meishan after stepping down as Sect Leader of the Jiang. (No one is quite sure what sparked that decision; possibly Lan Xichen was involved.)
Xue Yang, after he’d killed the entire Chang clan, looking bizarrely calm even as his neck is centered on the block before he's beheaded. Song Lan and Xiao Xingchen look on, both uninjured.
Meng Yao, taking over a minor sect in the far west of Qishan. So far away that no one bothers with him, so minor that no one really cares when the previous sect leader dies under mysterious circumstances. And after that, things run so much more smoothly! What’s to complain about?