Chapter Text
Overall, much of Jack’s life was rather monotonous. He spent hundreds of years doing more-or-less the same things, so he could generally guess what was going to happen to him on any given day, apart from infrequent disturbances.
Out of all the disturbances that could have happened, though, one of the last things Jack would have considered was being grabbed and shoved into a bag while he was walking down the street.
Of course, anyone who could grab him or shove him into a bag had to be some kind of spirit, since none of the humans could ever see him, but he couldn’t tell which one it was, on account of the bag blocking his sight. The inside of the bag was dusty with small fibers that made him sneeze, and he heard something mutter in response, but he couldn’t make it out through the thick fabric. Once his sneezing subsided, Jack began to struggle, knowing that situations where someone got kidnapped typically didn’t end so well for them. He could feel the adrenaline returning, feel his heartbeat pumping, but at least his mind wasn’t clouded by panic.
Despite his struggling, though, his captor was strong, and he didn’t manage to get out of the bag until he was set down on the floor.
Now finally releasing himself from the tangles of fabric, he heard a rough voice talking.
“Ah there he is! Jack Frost!”
Now that he could see, Jack found himself staring up at the impressive figure of North- Santa Claus. Just behind him, the Tooth Fairy was hovering, a smile spreading across her cheeks. Instead of responding, Jack just continued to stare for a moment before realizing it would probably be in his best interest to stand up (that way, if he was about to be attacked again, he would at least have a chance at fighting back or escaping).
“I hope the yetis treated you well?” North questioned.
“Oh, yeah, I love being shoved into sacks and kidnapped,” Jack drawled sarcastically.
His sarcasm, however, was apparently lost on North, who replied:
“Oh, good! That was my idea!” the man announced cheerfully. “You know Bunny, obviously.”
The older man gestured to a corner, where the Easter Bunny stood, arms crossed with a glare. Wonderful.
“And the Tooth Fairy.”
Suddenly, the Tooth Fairy was right up in his face.
“Hello, Jack!” she chirped. “I’ve heard a lot about you! And your teeth!”
Taken aback, Jack started stepping backward, trying to keep her out of his personal space. She lifted her hands as if she was about to reach out to touch him, but with a few more steps backward, he was out of range. Her baby fairies hovered around excitedly.
“And Sandman,” North continued.
Sandy was upright but appeared to be asleep.
“Sandy? Wake up!”
At this, the Sandman startled awake with a jolt, looking around and spotting Jack. He waved at him.
Okay. So, apparently, he was kidnapped by the Guardians of Childhood. Of all spirits.
“… Anyone wanna tell me why I’m here?”
The Sandman attempted to answer, using a series of sand symbols floating above his head, but Jack had no idea what they meant.
“…That’s not really helping.”
Jack sighed, beginning to walk around the room aimlessly, casually swinging his staff.
“I must’ve done something really bad to get you four together.”
“Well, actually…,” Toothiana began before North’s booming voice cut her off.
“YOU ARE GUARDIAN!”
Out of nowhere, a band of elves started playing triumphant music, tapestries unfolded, and a couple mini fairies tried to place a garland around his neck (which Jack tried to back away from, only to end up bumping into a yeti).
“THIS IS THE BEST PART!”
He had to keep backing away as North, the elven band, and a pair of fire-spinning yetis started to come closer. His attempts were once again prevented, though, as suddenly he was surrounded on all sides and the yetis were (gently) pushing him closer to the center. His confusion only grew as an elf glared at his bare feet and tried to get him to put on a pair of shoes that materialized out of nowhere. Then, North was holding a large book, and the fairies were smiling, and Sandy was raising a glass in a toast, and the Easter Bunny was rolling his eyes, and suddenly, a bolt of anger shot through him, momentarily breaking him out of the disconnected state he had been in.
Jack slammed his staff into the ground, ice shooting out in all directions. Cold wind blew out the fires while the ice made the elves slide, ceasing the music. Everyone stared at him, confusion etched onto their faces, as he took a few steps forward.
“What makes you think I want to be a guardian?”
The response he got was definitely not what he had expected.
North Just started laughing boisterously while everyone else looked between them awkwardly.
And North’s simple answer?
“Of course you do.”
Then, before Jack could get another word in, North raised a hand.
“Music!”
The elves started back up again for a second, but Jack shouted over them.
“No. Music.”
Thankfully, this cut the elves off, though one angrily threw down its instrument and stormed away.
“I’m not a Guardian,” Jack spoke, stressing each syllable to make sure they heard him.
“That’s what I said,” Bunny mumbled bitterly.
Ignoring the muttering, the Tooth Fairy flew over.
“Jack, I don’t think you understand what it is we do,” she told him, gesturing toward a giant globe. “Each of those lights is a child.”
“A child who believes,” added North. “And good or bad, naughty or nice, we protect them.”
Jack was staring up at the globe when suddenly, Toothiana’s fingers were in his mouth.
“Oh! They really are as white as fallen snow!”
“Tooth! Fingers out of mouth.”
“Oh, sorry. They’re beautiful.”
The fairy hovered away, but Jack turned to keep an eye on her, making sure she wasn’t going to shove her hands into his mouth again.
“You are Guardian now,” North continued. “So now, it is your responsibility to help us protect those children.”
North gestured with a sweeping hand to draw his attention back toward the globe. He knew that North wanted a particular reaction from him. He probably wanted Jack to get excited about this, to feel an urge to protect those children, to be eager to get started.
But with the diminishing of his brief anger, all he felt was a hollow numbness.
“Shouldn’t you pick someone more qualified?” Jack asked.
Truthfully he didn’t care how qualified he was. He just wanted to leave.
“Pick?” North questioned loudly. “You think we pick? No, you were chosen , like we were all chosen!”
Chosen?
“By Man in Moon.”
The Man in the Moon?
“What?”
“He chose you,” said the Tooth Fairy, her voice quiet. “A while ago, actually.”
Something was cutting through the apathy again- a sharp, heavy pain, a pain that the apathy was supposed to protect him from.
“… He talks to you…?” Jack asked softly.
But no one answered his question.
“You see, you cannot say no,” North spoke seriously. “It is destiny.”
Jack looked up at the moon, the feeling only getting worse.
“Wh-why wouldn’t he tell me that himself…?” Jack asked in disbelief, not sure if he was asking the Guardians or the Moon.
He began to run a hand through his hair, not wanting to accept what he was hearing.
“After 300 years, this is answer? To spend the rest of eternity figuring out how to bribe kids who can’t even see me? ”
He shook his head, letting out a single dry laugh.
“Yeah, no offense, but fuck that.”
The Easter Bunny blinked, as if he couldn’t believe Jack had just cursed at them, before stepping forward.
“How is that not offensive?!”
“And what was that thing about the Moon choosing me ‘a while ago’?” Jack continued. “Like, what, do you need me to open a pickle jar or something?!”
He saw Toothiana deflate, hovering a bit lower.
“Jack, Manny picked you because he thought we needed your help with Pitch,” Toothiana informed him.
“Turns out we didn’t , though,” Aster huffed. “ Big shocker , that.”
Jack paused.
“Wait, Pitch?” he questioned. “You mean the Boogeyman? What’d he do?”
The Guardians’ eyes widened in surprise.
“You don’t know?” North asked.
“Know what?” Jack scoffed. “Do you think me and Pitch are buddies or something? I don’t think I’ve even seen him since last decade!”
Bunny snarled, though Jack wasn’t sure why, but Toothiana flew closer to him.
“Jack, Pitch tried to hurt the world’s children,” Toothiana explained. “He wanted to control them with fear. He… He almost succeeded.”
Toothiana looked upset, but even with the numbness fading away, Jack couldn’t quite bring himself to care about that right then.
“And you were supposed to help,” Aster growled.
“Well, how was I supposed to know that?!” Jack questioned angrily. “Apparently, the Man in the Moon talks to you guys, but he hasn’t spoken to me in 300 years! What, am I supposed to just know when a man who doesn’t talk to me tells a group of people who don’t talk to me that they need my help to defeat someone I don’t talk to?! Am I supposed to be psychic now?!”
The anger was flooding his mind now, making thoughts fuzzy as his hands started to shake.
“We looked for you, ya Gumby!” Aster spat. “We searched everywhere and couldn’t find ya! So we fought Pitch without ya, and guess what?! We didn’t need yer help!”
“Bunny-”
“Oh, was I supposed to know that, too?!” Jack shot back. “Apparently you still don’t get it, so- Newsflash! I’m not psychic!”
His hands were shaking so much now that he was sure he’d have dropped his staff by now if his fingers weren’t stuck as clenched fists.
“And why now?!” Jack continued shouting. “If you already fixed the problem you needed me for, and you didn’t need me, then why fucking kidnap me out of nowhere?! So you can yell at me?!”
“Jack, no-”
“Oh, like this isn’t the first time you haven’t been MIA in months- ”
“You have no idea where I’ve been or what I was doing!”
“Really? Where were ya, then, mate?! ‘Cuz none of the other spirits saw ya, either!”
“That’s none of your business!”
“Aster-”
“What, too busy goofing off to care about the kids?!”
“Oh, fuck yo- ”
“ENOUGH!”
North’s yell rattled the workshop, effectively drowning out their bickering.
“Enough,” North repeated, his voice getting a little quieter. “We clearly have much to discuss.”
The older man rubbed the bridge of his nose.
“Jack,” he continued. “Truth is- we looked for you almost as soon as Manny told us. But you were nowhere to be found, and we didn’t have the time to keep looking. We had to defeat Pitch, with or without you. And after…”
He sighed.
“We still did not have time to look,” North admitted. “The children’s belief was damaged, and we had to restore it. We were busy, and with danger passed, it… slipped our minds.”
The shaking was affecting more than just his hands now, and North’s words were growing increasingly distant.
He had to go.
Now.
“Jack?”
“Whatever,” he breathed out. “I think it’s pretty clear that Manny made some kind of a mistake. You don’t need me , and I don’t need you .”
Even his own words were growing distant, tumbling from his mouth without him even thinking about it.
“So, how about you do me a favor and not kidnap me again, yeah?”
He turned to leave, only to feel someone grab his shoulder. He didn’t know who it was, but he flinched away regardless. A second later, he was swinging his staff and releasing a burst of snow at the Guardians.
Without looking back, Jack flew away.