Chapter Text
“Last card!” the blonde woman announced slapping a card down on the ever increasing pile and settling back in her seat, amber irises eyeing her opponent and daring the young girl to make a move.
“Pick two” was Haruno Sakura's counterattack, the smirk that had been blossoming on Tsunade's face promptly disappeared, she stared in thinly concealed shock as her pink haired companion slapped the card over Tsunade's square, it was indeed a 2.
Grumbling, the busty woman reached out and drew two cards from the market facedown only flipping them around when she had pulled them to her face.
12 cross and 11 triangle.
How unlucky. She barely suppressed her groan as Sakura played another card — a 4 square — then leaned back in her chair and signaled for Tsunade to make her move.
Glancing back at her cards, the older woman realized — with no small horror — that she had no matching card to play, grumbling under her breath, she reluctantly reached for the market.
Sakura smirked, sharp and cocky, Tsunade fought down a scowl. Clearly, the girl had been spending too much time with the Uchiha, speaking of which — “So it’s Sasuke now” Tsunade began without preamble. She could have sworn she saw her young friend's shoulders sag a little. Tsunade turned the action over in her mind, certainly not the type of reaction one would expect from a woman who was in a happy relationship.
Or was Sakura just happy to be in a relationship? The girl had never struck her as the desperate type though.
“Not you too, shifu” she mumbled under her breath playing a 4 circle.
Tsunade looked back at her cards, sighing in relief as she pulled out a 4 star and slapped it down face up.
“Me too what? You have to admit your so-called relationship came out of nowhere”
And into nowhere it would also go. That was if Sakura had any say in it. She scowled at the card at the top of the playing deck reaching for the market, opposite her, Tsunade preened.
It would seem the legendary sucker would soon suck no more.
“Eh” was the brilliant response Sakura gave her friend.
“Sasuke’s personality in a nutshell, for sure” Tsunade agreed slapping now a 4 cross.
Sakura gave her a narrowed look. She never could understand Tsunade's dislike for Sasuke, sure it wasn’t totally unfounded (Sasuke was could be an asshole all the time at times) but apparently that wasn’t enough to turn Tsunade completely off because, ahem ahem, Orochimaru “Give it a rest.” She suggested slapping an 11 cross.
Tsunade lit up (the woman could use a better poker face) slapping her 12 cross, Sakura grimaced in distaste reaching for the market. The smile abruptly left the blonde woman’s face when she realized she didn’t have a matching card to continue the game leading her to patronize the market albeit with muffled curses.
Sakura scowled again seeing as she also couldn’t continue reaching for the market again.
As did Tsunade.
And Sakura again.
“Oi!” the pink haired girl whined, “Look what you've done now, obaachan”
Amber eyes immediately shot her a piercing glare, “Mind your mouth, brat” she hissed then waved one perfectly manicured hand in the air, “You dare call this physique old?” she demanded.
Sakura merely scoffed as she studied her cards. She couldn’t argue with that. For who should have been an old hag, Tsunade was quite the exuberant beauty. Whatever secret technique she used to retain such allure at her age was one that Sakura hoped Tsunade would one day pass down to her.
As if knowing what she was thinking, Tsunade gave her a sharp smile slapping down a card, 20 “I need” she announced taking a rather large gulp from her liquor bottle.
They never played WHOT unaccompanied by Tsunade’s trusted bottles of alcohol.
“What?” Sakura asked dutifully.
Tsunade wiggled her eyebrows at her, “Star” she replied.
Sakura groaned reaching for the market again, she was begin to develop quite the abhorrence for eye wiggling “Just take two more while you’re at it” Tsunade advised as she slapped down a 2 star proceeding to laugh uproariously at the glare Sakura sent her way.
She slapped a 5 star, “Continue” she permitted while grinning to herself.
Perhaps her luck was changing for better.
“So you have date night tonight, right?” she asked seemingly offhandedly as Sakura's eyes seem to bore holes into the cards before her.
Green eyes rose up to give Tsunade an exasperated look, “I have dinner at Sasuke's all the time. It's not date night” if her fingers hadn't been clutching her cards she would have made air quotes.
“Well yes” Tsunade agreed easily as she watched Sakura finally settle on playing a 5 triangle, “But this would be the first time you'd attend as his girlfriend” she informed her not missing the brief look of disgust that flashed through her friend's face.
Seeing a trail, she continued, “You’re going to meet his parents”—
“I’ve already met his parents!” Sakura almost screamed cutting her off, “I see them all the time”
“Well yes” Tsunade agreed easily again drawing a look from Sakura as she played the 12 triangle that was in her possession, “But not as his girlfriend”
She would admit that she immensely enjoyed the look of irritation that flew through the younger female's face.
Good, good.
So maybe now, Sakura would tell her that thing she didn’t want to tell her. She knew the girl well, save for some elaborate sappy event deserving of being in the script of best of the best of cringey friends to lovers drama then there was simply no reason for Sakura to wake up and think dating Uchiha Sasuke was a fine idea.
There was also the other thing…
“Pick two!” the Haruno barked with perhaps too much feeling, amber eyes blinked, temporarily in another zone, Tsunade's mind had momentarily left the game, coming back, she found that Sakura had taken the time to play a 2 triangle.
Tsunade pursed her lips heading for the market, “And I don’t need relationship advice for an old, pining lady whose boyfriend is half mad and thinks he's some kind of snake lord”
Tsunade drew back at that pressing her newly collected cards to her bosom, “Why, you…” she hissed “I’ll have you know Orochimaru has never claimed to be a snake lord” she told her sternly.
Sakura noted drily how Tsunade didn’t bother to refute the “half-mad” part, “His name literally means 'big snake ring'” she deadpanned.
“Well then…” Tsunade dismissed with a flourish, “That’s his parents' fault, no?” She dropped a 13 triangle.
Sakura rolled her eyes, “What I'm saying is that you're in no position to give me relationship advice” then she snickered, “You don’t even have a relationship so to speak”
“Quiet your lying tongue!” Tsunade barked tossing back her alcohol, “I’ll let you know relationships are for the weak, they'll stress you out and make you get wrinkles” she enlightened Sakura, “I thought I taught you that much but immediately I turned my back, you ran off and got with the Uchiha boy”
Sakura bristled, “I didn’t”— she began but abruptly cut herself off.
Tsunade was staring at her with unconcealed interest, “Didn’t what?” she asked.
“Nothing” was the mumbled reply as Sakura played a 13 cross.
Tsunade hummed playing a 3 cross, “Sure must have broken that Chiyo's brat's heart” she said suddenly or at least to Sakura, it was sudden seeing as she hadn’t been expecting that.
Whaaaaaaaaaattttttttttt?
Even Tsunade knew about it?
How blind must she be?
She nearly choked on air, staring at Tsunade with wide eyes. Seeing as her opponent was not forthcoming with a counterattack, Tsunade raised her head to meet shocked green eyes.
“What?” she quipped and then, “You didn’t know?” she asked with a note of incredulity in her voice. Alright, a good dose of incredulity.
“Don’t judge me!” Sakura cried, “How did you even know? You don’t even know Sasori!”
“Well no, but I have ears” was Tsunade’s response.
Yeah, that told Sakura all of…nothing
“What does that even mean?” she wondered.
“It means just that” Tsunade said with a smirk, “You might not know but I meet up with the old thing”— a cough from Sakura and an answering glare from Tsunade — “from time to time” she shrugged “Let’s just say that age has not dulled Chiyo's gossiping abilities one bit” she tapped a red painted fingernail on the table, “Now, if you can close your mouth enough to play your turn…”
Sakura promptly snapped her jaw shut, silently fuming, her annoyance only intensifying at the self satisfied look Tsunade had on her face as she reached for her bottle of liquor.
Play my turn, huh?
She thought staring at her cards, she hadn’t wanted to go all out on the blonde woman all at once but it was what she deserved.
“Pick two!” she spat and without even giving the woman enough time to comply, she fired on “Hold on!” a 1 cross was slapped down “Hold on!” promptly followed by another 1 albeit of the circle type “Pick two!” she fired on “Suspension!” an 8 circle, “General Market!” a 14 circle “Last card!” she announced and then “Check up!” she slapped down a 14 triangle only then looking up to stare the defeated in the face.
Tsunade was watching in shock, amber eyes widened in disbelief, the mouth of the bottle frozen two inches from her lips which were parting haphazardly. She opened her mouth but no words seem to come out so she closed it again.
Sakura leaned back into her seat in light of the destruction she'd wrought.
Oh yeah, the Legendary Sucker definitely still sucked.