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English
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Published:
2021-10-11
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3,246
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1/1
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I'll Be With You In Your Dreams

Summary:

While flying, Skipper has an engine attack and crashes. Dusty falls into a deep depression and blames himself. Can Blade help him or will he lose Dusty? Read and find out.

Work Text:

Ok, here's another songfic. This time it's Hanson's I'll Be With You In Your Dreams. I'd like to warn that this fic does have mentions of suicide. If you do have thoughts of suicide, please don't keep to yourself. Talk to someone or call the suicide prevention @ 800-273-8255. There is someone who can help you. Thank you

 

Dusty sighed softly as he shook off his tarp, rolled off his sleeping mat and looked out his window. There was a storm raging outside, much like his emotions that were swirling around inside him and it looked like he wasn’t going back to sleep anytime soon. Actually, he hasn’t been able to sleep at all since Skipper’s death and he kept reliving it.

Yesterday, Skipper had asked Dusty if he felt like a flight, no racing, just a flight where father and son could talk. Of course, Dusty said yes, like he could ever turn a flight down to be with Skipper. A few minutes into the flight, Skipper felt off, nothing to alarm Dusty about but then as he was about to radio his son to ask if he felt like cutting their flight short, a sharp pain erupted in his engine compartment. Skipper gasped softly and before he could call out to Dusty, his engine stopped and he blacked out as he started plummeting to the earth below.

Meanwhile, Dusty had no idea his father was in trouble until he looked back and didn’t see the blue Corsair behind him but instead, saw him falling. Turning in the tightest turn possible, Dusty shot off after the falling plane, screaming Skipper’s name. But before he could get closer, the small plane realized that he wasn’t going to catch Skipper and, not wanting to see what would happen, he closed his eyes.

After he landed, Dusty raced over to Skipper, hoping against all hope that somehow, his dad had survived. But after the dust settled, his turquoise blue eyes took in the still and broken form of the once happy and proud Corsair. Cuddling as close as their forms would allow, Dusty nuzzled against Skipper’s body, hoping that the movement would somehow wake his father up, but to no avail. After that, the small air tractor couldn’t cope with the stress and passed out.

When he came to, he thought he had a nightmare but when Sparky came in to check on him, the look on Skipper’s mechanic’s face told him that it was no dream. Skipper was really gone. All of a sudden, the dam burst and Dusty started crying. There were no words as Sparky came over to comfort the small plane as he wrapped his tines around Dusty and hugged him tight.

After the funeral, it still didn’t seem real. At first Dusty thought it was a cruel trick his mind was playing on him but then reality hit and he started crying again. Chug, Dottie and Sparky went to their friend’s side and hugged him, no one spoke a word.

A few days passed and Dusty wasn’t doing any better. He tried to sleep but the nightmares he had always plagued him until he woke up like he did tonight. They always started out innocent enough but then they took a turn and always had Skipper falling from the sky.

After a while of staying awake and watching the storm, Dusty couldn’t handle the stress anymore and wanted to radio Blade. But he decided against it since it was barely after 1 am and a tired Blade was a grumpy Blade so he just watched the storm pass through, lightning illuminating his hangar.

Since his hangar was next to Skipper’s, and nobody else’s were around, Dusty turned on his light. He couldn’t sleep so he would look at pictures of him and the Corsair. Even though that was a good idea, the thoughts that were going through his mind were bad: it was all his fault. Why did he have to say yes to Skipper’s request? He should’ve said no and they would’ve stayed safe on the ground and he wouldn’t have crashed. Why didn’t Skipper call for help? As much as he wanted to blame his dad, Dusty couldn’t help but feel guilty. Before he knew it, he was falling into despair and depression was creeping up on him and there was nothing he could do.

Sparky had found the small plane staring into space the next morning. He drove up and placed a tine onto Dusty’s side, he breathed a sigh of relief as he felt the unmistakable corebeat pulsing under Dusty’s plating. Seeing the exhausted look on the small plane’s face, he came up with an idea.

A few minutes later, Sparky left his hangar and almost drove into Chug and Dottie. Voicing his concern, Chug said, “Dusty looks pretty bad, guys. I mean, I’ve tried getting him to talk but he won't even tell me how he’s feeling.”

Sparky sighed, “I’ve seen this before. Back when Skipper and I were stationed on the Flyesenhower, a few of the Jolly Wrenches committed suicide because some of their best friends were killed in action and they didn’t want to live without them. It was like their worlds ended. But I may have an idea. I just got off the radio with Maru. The park is undergoing some replantings and the park is closed to the public for a few weeks. I was thinking of sending Dusty over, maybe a change of scenery might help.”

Thinking that maybe that was a good idea, Chug and Dottie nodded as Sparky drove off to tell Dusty. Hopefully Piston Peak and the firefighters would get Dusty's mind off of Skipper’s death.

Meanwhile, Maru was telling Blade that Dusty was coming over. A smile formed on Blade’s face but quickly turned to a frown when the mechanic told him why.

“So, from what Sparky told me, Skipper had an engine attack while he and Dusty were taking a flight and Dusty’s been taking it pretty hard. Seems like the kid’s having survivor’s guilt. Think you could help him?”

“Of course, I’ve dealt with that with Nick and I’ll be more than happy to help Dusty. Just have to make sure that nobody starts jumping him when he gets here though.”

“No problem, I’ll tell them now so they’ll know what to expect. He should be here within a couple of hours.”

With that, Maru drove off to tell the others and Blade waited by the runway for the air tractor, no matter how long it would take for Dusty to arrive.

A couple of hours later, Dusty made it to Piston Peak and was requesting permission to land when he saw Blade sitting on his helipad facing the runway, icy blue eyes flicking up and catching turquoise blue eyes. Lowering his landing gear, Dusty started powering down a little as his wheels touched the tarmac and gently came to a stop a few feet away from the end of the runway.

Blade rolled towards him, knowing that his boyfriend wasn’t in the mood for a kiss, he settled on nuzzling the plane. Dusty surprised himself when he nuzzled the AugustaWestland back hard, missing the gentle gesture that he was deprived of since Skipper’s death. No offense, he liked how his friends gave him hugs but being nuzzled was different. You could tell how someone was feeling just by the nuzzle itself and right now, Dusty needed the comfort that Blade was only too happy to give.

After a few minutes, Dusty backed up a bit and cleared his throat, “Sorry Blade. I, uh-”

“Don’t worry, Dust. It’s alright. Maru told me what happened and if you ever need to talk, I’m here for you, ok? And since the park’s closed-”

“-we can talk whenever I feel like?”

“You know, you scare me when you do that.”

Dusty gave Blade a smile that didn’t reach his eyes as Blade came close to kiss his cheek. Pulling back a bit, Blade gestured behind Dusty towards his hangar, “If you want to take a nap, sweetcore, you’re more than welcome to. I know the flight from Propwash is tiring.”

“Thanks Blade, but I’m ok. I-”

“Dusty, I can see that you’re exhausted and I know how you’re feeling-”

“You don’t know how I’m feeling!! Nobody knows how I’m feeling! I feel like shit and I haven’t been able to sleep because I have nightmares that keep me awake! I feel like I’m responsible for Dad’s death! I should’ve said no when he asked me if I wanted to go on a flight with him! But no, what do I do?! I say yes and fly ahead of him so he couldn’t even ask for help. I had to see him fall from the sky and hear him crash so don’t you fucking dare say that you know how I feel!”

After a moment of silence, the realization of what he just said came back and hit him in the face as he stuttered, “B-Blade, I’m s-”

“Don’t ever apologize, Dusty but I want you to know that I’ve been through everything that you’re going through right now. I even wanted to kill myself, hell, I even tried. I felt like my life wasn’t even worth living after the crash that took Nick’s life. My depression was getting the better of me and also exhaustion and starvation. But one night, I was so tired of feeling empty that I tried one more time to end my life when all of a sudden Nick appeared in front of me. He looked so sad, Dusty, that I could even feel it. He asked me if I was sure I was doing the right thing, I said that I wanted to be with him and if killing myself would get me there then I would do it.”

As Dusty digested that Blade wanted to commit suicide to be with Nick, a thought came up unprovoked. Blade gently nudged him to get his attention. Shaking his nose, the thought disappeared as Dusty gave an embarrassed cough, “Uh sorry, Blade. My mind wandered.”

Concerned icy blue eyes looked straight into turquoise blues as the AgustaWestland asked, “You ok?”

“Yeah.”

With the small one-worded answer, Dusty snuggled close to Blade, just wanting to feel his boyfriend next to him as he thought about what to say next: “What made you stay?”

Blade pressed himself against Dusty’s side as he answered, “Would you believe me if I told you that Nick said that someone was out there looking for me?”

“Really?”

“He did. When I told him that I loved him and I wouldn’t love no one else but him, he said, “Blade, I love you so much but I’m dead, I know you have so much love to give and I want you to keep on living your life to the fullest. One day, I’m sure of it, you’ll fall in love again. And I know that you'll love him so much like you love me. So, please, Blade, please, give yourself a chance to find that someone.” And before he left, he told me, “Would you believe that there’s a plane looking for someone too?”

“Huh, so that’s why you didn’t seem weirded out that a plane like me had a crush on you.”

Blade smiled, “Nope but Nick was right though. I do have a lot of love to give.”

WIth that, Blade gently pulled away, much to Dusty’s disappointment, and turned to face the small plane. A gentle kiss was placed on the air tractor’s lips as Blade whispered, “I have to take care of a few things, Dusty, so please get some rest. If you feel like you can’t sleep then please talk to someone. I’ll be back as soon as I can, I promise.”

With that, Blade rolled out of his hangar, begrudgingly started his rotors and lifted off, most undoubtedly to the Lodge.

Dusty didn’t really feel like talking to anyone so he stayed inside Blade’s hangar. Even though he felt like he could sleep, sleep was evading him. Everytime he closed his eyes, a nightmare would show itself and Dusty would wake up, frightened. He decided that he would close his eyes just to rest them.

When he opened them again, he realized that it was night and that he wasn’t alone anymore.

‘Damn, how did Blade come in without me hearing him?’

Sighing softly, Dusty gently moved away from Blade’s warm body. Oh, how he envied his sleeping boyfriend: no nightmares, just peaceful relaxing sleep. Shaking himself, Dusty pushed open the hangar doors just wide enough to slip through and headed off towards Blade’s cliff.

When he got there, the wind brushed against the air tractor’s body, making him shiver. ‘I should’ve brought my tarp with me.’

As he sat there, the memories of what happened to Skipper came back and hit him like a freight train. A lone tear slipped from one of his eyes, followed by another and another until he was sobbing.

“Oh, Dad, I’m so sorry. I should’ve saved you but I didn’t. I was so far ahead that I couldn’t catch you when you fell. Please, please forgive me.”

As Dusty was unleashing all of his hurt, he didn’t realize someone was standing behind him until:

“Dusty?”

Gasping, Dusty tried clearing his throat and turned around. Instead of finding Blade, he saw the ghostly form of Skipper. Backing up a bit, Dusty stuttered, “D-dad? W-what-”

“Dusty, son, it’s ok. It wasn’t your fault. I didn’t know what was going to happen so there’s nothing to forgive but I’d like you to please stop feeling guilty for what happened. It was my time, I was just in the wrong place.”

“I feel so bad though. I-”

With that, Skipper came closer to Dusty, gently guiding him away from the cliff’s edge. Dusty nestled himself against Skipper’s side, wanting nothing more than to feel the Corsair’s corebeat but he knew that wasn’t going to happen.

“Dusty, I wanted to talk to you, that's why I’m here. I love you so much, son, and I’m sorry that my death is causing you all of this heartbreak. I never wanted you to hurt like this which is why I want you to know that I’ll always be with you and-”

With that, Skipper pulled away from Dusty, turned around, rolled forward a bit and kissed his son on the spot right above his eyes and started to sing softly:

“If I'm gone when you wake up
Please, don't cry
And if I'm gone when you wake up
It's not goodbye
Don't look back at this time as a time
Of heartbreak and distress
Remember me, remember me
'Cause I'll be with you in your dreams
Oh, I'll be with you, oh, oh

But If I'm gone when you wake up
Please, don't cry
And if I'm gone when you wake up
Don't ask why
Don't look back at this time
As a time of heartbreak and distress
Remember me, remember me
'Cause I'll be with you in your dreams
Oh, oh

Don't cry
I'm with you
Don't cry
I'm by your side
Don't cry
I'm with you
Don't cry
I'm by your side

And though my flesh is gone, whoa
I'll still be with you at all times
And although my body's gone, oh
I'll be there to comfort you at all times
Oh, oh

 

But If I'm gone when you wake up
Please, don't cry
And if I'm gone when you wake up
Don't ask why
Don't look back at this time
As a time of heartbreak and distress
Remember me, remember me
'Cause I'll be with you
I'll be with you in your dreams

Oh, I'll be with you
Oh
I'll be with you in your dreams
I'll be with you
I'll be with you

I don't want you to cry and weep, oh
I want you to go on living your life
I'm not sleeping an endless sleep, oh
'Cause in your heart
You have all of our good times
Oh, all of our good times
Oh, oh, you have

And if I'm gone when you wake up
Don't ask why
Don't look back at this time
As a time of heartbreak and distress
Remember me, remember me
'Cause I'll be with you in your dreams

Oh
I'll be with you in your dreams
I'll be with you
Oh
I'll be with you
I'll be with you in your dreams
I'll be with you in your dreams.”

When Skipper finished singing, Dusty was finally asleep. Smiling, the Corsair rolled forward to give the small plane a nuzzle and whispered, “I love you, Dusty.”

As Skipper was about to disappear, a noise caught his attention and looked behind his son and saw Blade. The AgustaWestland's eyes widened as Skipper rolled towards him. Being careful not to wake the sleeping air tractor, Skipper lowered his voice, “Hello, Blade. I was hoping I would get a chance to meet you. I’m sorry it had to be like this. Thank you for giving Dusty a chance. It’s very heartening to know that he has someone who loves him like you do. Oh and before I forget, Nick wanted me to tell you that he’s very proud of you. Well, Blade, I apologize but I have to go now. Take care of Dusty, please, and take care of yourself as well. Goodbye, Blade and thank you for everything you’ve done for my son.” Blade smiled and tipped his nose as a sign of respect, the Corsair vanished.

‘Wait, did he just say that Nick was proud of me?’

Looking towards the Air Tractor, Blade carefully snuggled down next to the small plane, gently placed a kiss to his cheek and fell asleep.

The next morning found Dusty and Blade both on the cliff, still sound asleep until:

“Good morning, boys. Time to rise and shine.”

“Good morning, Maru.”

“Good morning, Maru.”

Smiling at his two friends, Maru set down two oil cans he brought with him in front of the two aircraft and then he looked towards Dusty, “How did you sleep, kid?”

“I slept really well, thank you, although I’m still pretty tired. Hey Blade?”

“Yes, love?”

“Would you believe me if I told you I saw Dad last night?”

Blade nodded, “I would because I saw him as well.”

A surprised look crossed Dusty’s face as he asked,”You did?”

“Mmhmm, he thanked me for giving you a chance and he surprised me by saying that Nick was proud of me.”

“He certainly should be proud, Blade. You’ve come a long way from the mess of a helicopter to the respected Fire Chief that you are today. Anyway, I should think both Nick and Skipper are very proud of you both.”

After they finished their breakfast, Dusty and Blade went back towards Blade’s hangar since the AgustaWestland wanted to talk. When they got to the doors, a breeze brushed against both Dusty’s and Blade’s platings. Closing their eyes, the two aircraft stilled as the wind gently blew around them. After a few moments, Blade opened his eyes followed by Dusty. As they turned around, their gazes towards the horizon, both smiling and eyes misting, they silently said their goodbyes to the two ghosts who would watch over them and keep them safe until they were all together again.