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a pseudonym to fool him (he couldn't have made a worse move)

Summary:

In which Mo Ran decides to test his husband by creating a fake IG account, Taxian-jun, and hitting on him.

All is well until Chu Wanning texts back.

Notes:

inspired by my friend jc's tweet, hano's addition, and wivvie's suggested soundtrack haha

if possible, please read with creator's style on ;)

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

It’s not that Mo Ran doesn’t trust Wanning. Far from it, actually.

It’s more that he saw the idea on Reddit, found it funny, and thought, hey, why not?

Besides, although he is living his best life with Chu Wanning, his husband, there’s no denying their pre-relationship years were… Hectic, to put it mildly. Misunderstanding after misunderstanding, misplaced grudges, a whole lot of miscommunication, so yes, maybe sometimes Mo Ran felt that marrying Chu Wanning was like biting a lot more than he could chew. And perhaps sometimes he woke up and wondered if that day was finally the one Wanning would realize he was done with him and his bullshit.

Granted, those were rare occurrences, but still, a little reassurance would be more than welcome.

A wiser man would realize he was self-sabotaging, but, ah, no one had ever known Mo Ran for his wisdom.

He sets up a new Instagram account, Taxian-jun, with a cutesy picture of a husky and a cat as his icon, posts some random pictures for a week and when he deems his profile convincing enough, starts following Chu Wanning’s.

Nothing happens at first. Taxian-jun likes almost every photo Wanning ever posted. Nothing. He leaves a comment here and there, even a compliment if it’s one of those few pictures on Chu Wanning’s Instagram in which the man himself appears. Wanning doesn’t acknowledge him. 

And it doesn’t help that his husband isn’t big on social media - a fact Mo Ran’s not only familiar with, but also has been trying very hard to change. In a few days, he has commented on every single one of Wanning’s posts and is thoroughly ignored.

Mo Ran resigns to wait for an excuse to try to catch Wanning’s attention one more time. It’s oddly reminiscing of those old days, when he would run around Wanning day and night, laughing and teasing him, look at me, laoshi. Heh, maybe he’s getting sidetracked. The point of this challenge is Wanning ignoring him, after all.

The opportunity presents itself on a Saturday morning, while Mo Ran cooks their breakfast and his husband sits on a counter stool, idly playing on his phone.

He stirs the congee with a hand and absently-mindedly scrolls through his social media. Delighted, he sees that Wanning added a new picture to his stories. It’s a picture of him and Xue Meng, from the latter’s birthday party. Chu Wanning is holding a wine glass and his lips are curled up in a small, pleased smile. He’s wearing the blue turtleneck Mo Ran gifted him on his last birthday and those high-waisted trousers that highlight his dainty waist nicely. Xue Meng is standing next to him looking… Like Xue Meng. Whatever. Mo Ran couldn’t care less.

Ever since Mo Ran took the picture he’s been coaxing Wanning to post it. He even threatened to post the photo himself with a tacky, embarrassing caption if Chu Wanning didn’t post it and that seemed to do the trick.

Glancing furtively at Wanning, who’s still lazily laying over the counter, he switches his accounts and sends a message.

Today 09:32

Sent message: damn baobei

Sent message: what a pretty little waist

Sent message: u should post more pictures of urself

 

He hears the notification's "ping" and watches through his peripheral vision the moment Wanning straightens himself up.

“Mo Ran…”

Mo Ran promptly turns around with a shining smile.

“What is it, Wanning?”

Naturally, Mo Ran realizes, Wanning would tell him the moment anyone dared to hit on him. How could he ever doubt him?

However, Chu Wanning doesn’t say anything. Instead, he just frowns, scrutinizes Mo Ran with narrowed eyes, and shakes his head, lying on the counter again and putting his phone away.

… Alright. Maybe he didn’t judge it important enough to tell Mo Ran about it. Maybe he thought that simply ignoring it was enough.

It is fine. It is precisely what he wanted from it, even.

But, well, being ignored by Chu Wanning irks that one part of Mo Ran that makes him want to poke the man until he looks at him. So he sends another text.

This time Wanning answers.

Sent message: i know u read it

Sent message: wont u answer me? 🥺

Received message: ... I am married.

 

Mo Ran’s chest swells up with pride and his cheeks hurt from the wide grin plastered on his face. Yes, Wanning, you are married!

Beaming, he sends another message.

Sent message: its just a innocent compliment

Sent message: nothing for ur husband to get jealous about hehe ;)

 

He watches in fascination as Wanning rolls his eyes and ignores it, putting his phone into his pocket and sending a glare in his direction.

“Isn’t the congee burning? Stop playing around.”

Mo Ran jumps and almost lets his phone fall in the pot. He turns off the stove and smiles apologetically.

“Sorry, I got distracted. I’ll serve it in a moment, baobei.”

Chu Wanning huffs and crosses his arms, and Mo Ran runs around the kitchen to pamper his lovely, wonderful, faithful husband.

 

 


 

 

That’s the end of it.

...

Or it should have been, if only Mo Ran knew when to stop.

Rather, he floods Wanning’s direct messages daily, trying to find out how much he can push until he earns himself a block.

By now he has a streak of ignored messages that range from casual attempts at starting a conversation to indiscreet compliments. Quite pathetic, if it was him demeaning himself for a few crumbles of Chu Wanning’s attention for real.

(Not that he wasn’t pathetic when it came to Wanning. Luckily, they were both pathetic for each other together.)

Mo Ran takes another bite of his fried rice, while deliberately ignoring Xue Meng’s rambling, and unlocks his phone. Chu Wanning must have finished his morning classes already, and Mo Ran intended to use the last minutes of his break to pester him

Yesterday 21:49

Sent message: thats a great photo

Sent message: u look damn fine with ur hair down

Sent message: 😏

 

Today 08:51

Sent message: good morning

Sent message: how r u doing today, beautiful?

Sent message: ;)

Today 12:17

Sent message: have u had lunch already baobei

Sent message: ?

Sent message: remember to eat well

Sent message: id hate to see u gettin sick

Sent message: 🥺

Sent message: ah ah ah

Sent message: i saw u read it

Sent message: ur still online

Sent message: wont u really pay any attention to me? :(

Received message: No.

Received message: What do you even want?

Sent message: oh u replied <3

Sent message: to get to know u better, of course :D

Received message: This is ridiculous. Get lost.

Sent message: so cold baobei :’(

Received message: What’s the point of this?

 

“What are you doing?” Xue Meng tosses a chopstick in his direction, which he dodges easily.

“I’m getting Wanning to block me,” he cheerfully informs.

His cousin chokes on his drink, coughing all over the table, “What?”

Mo Ran would find it disgusting if he wasn’t so enraptured by the chat on his phone. He'd prefer to have this talk with Wanning in the same room, so he could appraise and take in his every reaction. But, alas, it was the first time that Chu Wanning engaged in conversation since that first day. Who knows when he would again? It was better to take this chance.

Sent message: the point?

Sent message: the point is that u r so hot, baobei 🥵

Sent message: and i cant stop thinking about all the nasty things id like to do to u

Sent message: wouldnt u like some excitement?

Sent message: just between us ofc

Sent message: married life can get dull sometimes, or so i heard ;)

Received message: Oh.

Received message: I get it now.

Sent message: so what do u say?

 

Wanning must be spluttering indignantly and glaring at his phone. Such a shame Mo Ran isn't there to see it.

“Are you guys fighting? Mo Ran, what do you mean by 'blocking'?” Xue Meng demands, all but climbing on the table. “Are you breaking up?”

He chuckles, “No, we’re--”

Just at this moment, his phone beeps with Wanning’s text and he opens it, amused--

Sent message: so what do u say?

Received message: Ok.

 

… Ok?

What--

What does it mean, “Ok”?

He stares at his phone, blinking pathetically at it.

Xue Meng’s repeated cries for his name fall numb to his ears. 

“Ok” as in, “Ok, I’m blocking you right now, you homewrecker. Never talk to me again”, right? Right?

His phone beeps again.

Received message: But it's just texting, alright?

Received message: Not now though!

 

“Come on mutt, say something!”

He reads it over and over again. His heart cracks a little more each time.

Ok. But it's just texting, alright? Not now though!

Mo Ran tries to swallow through the tightness in his throat and finally turns to Xue Meng.

“Maybe… Maybe we are breaking up.”

 

 


 

 

Mo Ran barely manages to make it through the rest of his workday.

He fluctuates between staring at his window in stunned silence, slamming his fingers on his keyboard in a rage spree, and locking himself in the bathroom to fight back a crying fit. Rinse and repeat until it’s 18 o’clock and he’s sprinting out of the building, leaving a cursing Xue Meng behind.

Making up his mind, he drives back home imagining all the things he will tell Wanning. Scripts the whole confrontation, plans how to best push Chu Wanning’s buttons in a way he hasn’t done in years.

It’s only when he opens the door to their empty apartment that he falters, swallowing down a new wave of tears.

… Maybe he is taking things too far. 

Wanning… Wanning didn’t do anything truly. Who can say if he really means to cheat on Mo Ran? Maybe he didn’t understand what Taxian-jun proposed, or maybe he was just leading Taxian-jun on, to see how far he’d go?

There are so many possibilities and Mo Ran-- He doesn’t want to ruin what they have. Not without being sure first.

As he chops the vegetables, he takes his time to breathe in and calm down. By the time Wanning gets home, Mo Ran has already decided to wait and see what will happen before impulsively ruining his marriage. Never mind he’s the only one who still cares about it, apparently.

He hears Wanning's footsteps as he makes his way to the kitchen and, without a word, hugs Mo Ran from behind, resting his cheek on his back.

Any other day, Mo Ran would be melting under the unprompted affection. But now it leaves a bitter taste in his mouth to think they’ve come so far to get Wanning comfortable showing his affection and maybe he’ll be throwing everything away soon.

“Difficult day?”

“Mn.” Wanning nuzzles his face against Mo Ran and yawns. “Just tiring. Is that broccoli?”

“And carrots. They’re very sweet, you’ll see.”

Wanning groans and Mo Ran can’t help chuckling as he guides him to the dinner table.

“Too much work today?” Mo Ran asks, dropping a couple of vegetables on Chu Wanning’s plate, as the other man takes a bite of the steamed chicken and glares at him. “It’s sweet! You have to taste it, Wanning.”

“Only a few papers to grade. Mei Hanxue was being a headache, too.” He takes a carrot, experimentally, and Mo Ran observes with glee the way he reluctantly takes another piece. “What about yours?”

“Oh, you know. Same old office day. Here, say ' ah' ,” he asks, taking one of the broccoli with his own chopsticks and shoving it into Wanning’s mouth while he splutters. “I bet your day was way more exciting than mine.”

“Mo Ran!” He hisses, chewing the insulting vegetable. 

He smiles, innocently, and tilts his head. “Tell me more about your day, baobei. Nothing interesting happened?”

Chu Wanning furrows his eyebrows and holds Mo Ran’s stare, before turning away.

“No,” he says and his ears start to redden.

Mo Ran grips his chopsticks so tight it’s a surprise they don’t break in half.

“Really? Nothing at all?”

You just have to tell me, Wanning, he thinks, gritting his teeth and his chopsticks and still smiling. If you tell me, I’ll forgive you.

But Wanning just shakes his head and tries to act nonchalant while his blush intensifies. Mo Ran ends up in need of a new pair of chopsticks, after all.

 

 


 

 

They still cuddle when Chu Wanning finishes working on his classes’ material and joins Mo Ran in bed. In part, because Mo Ran is half asleep already and tucking his husband into his arms and kissing his forehead is only natural, but mostly because gone are the days in which he could stay angry at Wanning for more than a couple of hours. Especially when he hasn’t even done anything wrong. Exactly. Not yet, at least.

The next day, Xue Meng decides to give him a cold shoulder and ignore whatever it is that’s going on with his relationship right now. It’s for the best since Mo Ran barely has the attention span to complete the tasks Xuanji gave him, let alone to avert Xue Meng’s prying.

When it is clear he won't get anything else done for now, he logs into Taxian-jun's account and ponders what to text next.

Received message: But it's just texting, alright?

Received message: Not now though!

 

Today 14:25

Sent message: sure baobei, just texting~

Sent message: unless u want to send me some exclusive pictures too hehe

 

He isn't expecting an answer anytime soon, considering Chu Wanning's schedule, and he puts the phone on his table, studying his options. Basically, his goal is to see exactly how far Wanning would go with this affair - could it be called an affair already? - and confront him when he has enough proof.

If he gathered enough proof of anything. A part of him still naively hopes that his husband would put an end to it before it got any far.

But that's just him fooling himself. Chu Wanning's text comes not too long later.

Received message: Shut up.

Received message: And what is this nonsense about pictures?

Received message: Don't you have more important things to do than texting me?

Sent message: well dont u?

Received message: ...

Received message: Yes, I do.

Received message: Goodbye.

Sent message: ahhh no, sorry

Sent message: pls dont go

Sent message: lets talk some more 🥺

Sent message: u know, ive been wondering

Sent message: how much does that pretty mouth of urs stretch? 😏

Received message: GOODBYE.

 

Mo Ran chuckles against his knuckles, despite himself, picturing Chu Wanning all flustered in the middle of his class. It's been a long while since he last teased Chu Wanning while he was in class. Why did he stop doing it? Perhaps he wasn't wrong in his comment about wedding life getting dull. Is this why Wanning is playing along with this? Is he having fun? It feels like old times and, goddammit, Mo Ran wishes it was him texting Wanning and not… Well, technically him.

And Chu Wanning hasn't taken the conversation anywhere really inappropriate.

Maybe this is something they can talk out! They can both work on shaking up their marriage and take back the old habits they lost somewhere along these four years.

This hopeful feeling lasts all day long, long after they eat their takeout dinner, and Mo Ran sits on the end of the couch, playing his video game, while Chu Wanning lies with his head on the other end, his feet on Mo Ran's lap. They both pretend Mo Ran can't see he's back at playing that one gacha game through the colorful reflections on his glasses.

He only catches Chu Wanning's sneaky glance because it's precisely the moment he dies to another troll and he tosses the controller away in order to stretch his arms. Wanning quickly ducks his head behind his phone and Mo Ran raises an eyebrow.

At the same time, his phone vibrates on his thigh and when Mo Ran unlocks it, he thanks every entity for forgetting to unmute it. Because the text he just received is from Chu Wanning. To Taxian-jun.

Today 22:51

Received message: What do you care about how my mouth stretches?

 

Mo Ran has to read it three times until he believes his eyes. He’s torn between laughing - because Chu Wanning trying to initiate sexting is always something awkwardly precious - and kicking him - because said sexting isn’t being directed at him.

And to think he would do it right here, in the same room as Mo Ran. On the same couch, even!

Sent message: oh i was only wondering

Sent message: ur lips look so delicate and small

Sent message: wouldnt want them to tear if something too big was shoved into them

Received message: Improper.

Received message: Do you hear yourself?

Sent message: we r texting, how can i hear myself baobei?

Received message: 🙄

Sent message: hey what about your gag reflex?

 

Chu Wanning gasps, barely audible, and Mo Ran squeezes his leg, prompting him to look at him again.

“What are you doing over there? Playing that game again?”

Chu Wanning’s phoenix eyes narrow in two slits and he huffs, “Wouldn’t you like to know?” and turns his attention back to his phone.

Mo Ran gapes. 

Yes! He would! That’s why he asked!

But the joke is on you, Wanning, he thinks, gritting his teeth. I know exactly what you’re up to on your damned phone!

Oh, how he missed those days when his only issue about Chu Wanning and his phone was if his husband was wasting a copious amount of time and money on that game of his.

His phone lights up with a new message and Mo Ran almost tosses it across the room.

Received message: It's alright.

Sent message: what do u mean by that wanning

Sent message: does it mean u could take my cock without choking? is that what u r saying?

Received message: How

Received message: Presumptuous

Received message: !!

Sent message: hm. but what if i want you to choke, baobei?

Sent message: i think id like to

Sent message: pull ur hair and fuck into ur cute mouth until u r choking and crying

 

He types and sends everything in a horny-angry frenzy. His husband squirms and blushes infuriatingly alluring and Mo Ran fumes.

“Shameless,” Chu Wanning says under his breath and… Mo Ran deflates.

It’s exactly the way he used to say to Mo Ran, with the same aggrieved frown and the red-rimmed eyes that tell Wanning is just as shameless.

All at once, his anger vanishes, and in its place it's anguish washing over him again. It should be him at the receiving end of this scolding. And it is. But it isn’t. And, holy shit, what mess did he get themselves into?

He can't dwell on the specifics of it, because Chu Wanning raises his head and looks directly at Mo Ran, piercing him with a glare - as if it was Mo Ran bullying him and not some rando on the internet. Again, yes, technically it was him, but also not, whatever. Chu Wanning licks his lips, eyebrows pointing down as sharp swords, and Mo Ran gulps, fighting off his tears and his growing dick - because yeah, it seems that heartbreak and a raging boner are not mutually exclusive.

“Wanning, are you alright? You look a bit hot.”

He gets an affronted yelp in response. The next thing Mo Ran knows, Chu Wanning is jumping on him, assaulting his mouth. Mo Ran’s reaction is automatic - parting his lips to take in Wanning's sweet tongue, grabbing and pulling him into his lap -, but his mind goes blank.

“What--” he breaks off the kiss, gasping for air. “Wanning, what--”

He slides off Mo Ran’s embrace, hissing, “Shameless!”, and kneels on the carpet, in between Mo Ran’s thighs. His hands rush to pull down Mo Ran’s sweatpants and, oh, Mo Ran’s mind clicks back in place. He grips Wanning’s hair, pulling his face away the exact moment he manages to free Mo Ran's half-hard cock.

“Wanning, do you want my cock so bad?” He can't quite keep the disbelief from his voice. Chu Wanning nods minimally, staring intently as Mo Ran slowly strokes himself. "Fuck, Chu-laoshi, you're no better than a desperate whore. Ask for it.”

Chu Wanning sends him one of those indignant glares. Mo Ran pulls his hair harder.

“Shut up,” he snarls. “Shut up, Mo Ran.”

He hums and brings Wanning’s face down. Despite his words, Chu Wanning obediently opens up his mouth and Mo Ran brushes the tip of his cock in his lips, smearing precum all over. Then he drags Wanning away again, who whimpers, digging his fingers on Mo Ran’s thighs.

“Wanning, ask.”

“Mo Ran, I…” He licks his lips and closes his eyes, and bemoans, “Fuck my mouth, please.”

 What can Mo Ran do, then, but oblige?

 

 


 

 

“What does it mean? What does it mean?”

“You should talk to him, A-Ran,” comes Ye Wangxi’s soothing voice from his earphones. “Openly.”

“How do we even talk about it?”

It’s barely 5:45 AM and Ye Wangxi has just finished listening to him pouring his heart out while he jogs his frustration out in the park.

“For a starter, why did you do it?” To his friend’s credit, she doesn’t sound angry for being woken up and then info dumped so early in the morning.

"I don't know! I just wanted to know for sure that Wanning was faithful… And then he wasn't!"

She hums at the other end of the call, “You know… This plan was doomed to fail from the beginning, right?”

He scoffs, trying to ignore the hurt because it is Ye Wangxi. “I know I may not be the greatest guy, but I don’t think that warrants--”

“No, silly,” she interrupts him with a laugh. “I mean that Chu Wanning loves you. Isn't it natural that he would be interested in you again, even if he doesn't know it is you?"

That finally makes him pause, frowning at those words and catching his breath in heavy gasps.

“The way I see it," she continues when he doesn't answer, "he was charmed by you all over again. And maybe things between you two have gotten somewhat monotonous lately and Chu Wanning got excited with the idea of talking with this interesting stranger. I don’t know, that’s the part you two have to talk about. But,” she sighs, “you are still the one he loves and is attracted to.”

“Maybe,” he begrudgingly concedes.

“And Chu Wanning has such strong morals and ethics… I seriously doubt he’d go all the way and have an affair for real. I think he would rather break up before anything.”

He’s about to answer when he hears faint, poorly concealed giggling.

Could you imagine it if Chu Wanning broke up with him… To be with him? That would be so tragic," except the giggling intensifies and the person doesn't sound concerned at all.

Mo Ran groans and pinches his nose bridge. “Why is that bitch there?”

“Xi’er!” Said bitch whines, now closer to the phone. “Mo Ran is so mean!”

“A-Tong, please behave.”

“And why am I on speaker?”

“You woke me up, it’s only fair I get to hear the gossip too,” Song Qiutong deadpans, dropping her high-pitched act. “Be thankful Nangong Si is a heavy sleeper, otherwise we’d be all here having tea while you pour your heart out to Xi’er.”

Ye Wangxi,” it's his turn to whine.

“Sorry A-Ran, you know how it is.” She sounds genuinely apologetic and he sighs. He does know how it is, the way Ye Wangxi, despite being the most amazing person he knows, seemingly can't ever say no to those two idiots.

“But I really think the best thing you can do is talk to your husband. I’m sure everything will work out."

He ends the call not long after, not willing to elaborate any longer on his marriage issues now that he learned about the unwanted audience, but he still ponders about what Ye Wangxi said all the way back home. It was somewhat comforting to see it this way. Maybe he did manage to get Chu Wanning’s attention twice? That was a feat in and by itself. Maybe it even attested to how much Wanning liked him.

Mo Ran places a kiss on Wanning’s forehead before leaving for work and smiles fondly as he furrows his eyebrows and turns around in his sleep.

Alright, he’ll get a second opinion, and then he will put an end to this story. For better or for worse.

That’s how he finds himself calling his husband on his lunch break to let him know he’ll be going out with Xue Meng and Shi Mei after work.

“There are some vegetable dumplings in the fridge. And pork. Will you be good?”

“Mo Ran, I’m not a kid,” he chastises him but sounds amused. “Don’t worry about me, I’ll be ok. Have fun. Tell them I said hi.”

“Mnn, will do. Love you, baobei.”

“I love you too.”

He only sends a text inviting Shi Mei, actually. Xue Meng is giving him a cold shoulder today, so at the end of the day, Mo Ran simply passes by his cousin’s desk and pulls him by his collar while he flounces and grunts, and drives them to the bar where they meet Shi Mei.

Then he starts drinking, and talking, and drinking, and when he realizes it, he is slamming his hands on the table while Shi Mei and Xue Meng stare at him with dumbfounded expressions.

“-- and so he answered those texts back! But then he put his phone away and gave me head. What am I supposed to make of it?”

“Gave you h-- Mo Ran!” Xue Meng screeches. “What the heck are you talking about?! We don’t want to know about Chu-laoshi doing whatever with you!”

Mo Ran dismisses him with a wave of his hand.

“Tch, it’s not like you didn’t catch us that one time while I was sucking Wanning's-- Ah.” He stops talking when Xue Meng grows paler and paler. “No, you actually didn’t catch us that time, haha, anyway.”

Mo Ran!

“A-Ran,” Shi Mei interrupts before it gets out of hand, “I think Ye Wangxi is right. Come clean about everything.”

Xue Meng crosses his arms and slumps on his seat, taking a deep breath. “Yeah, I think it’s important to keep in mind that Chu-laoshi's only flaw is his taste in men. He probably just gave any attention to Taxian-jun because he reminded him of you. And what a ridiculous name that is, by the way.”

“Yeah, you seduced him twice, congratulations.” Shi Mei takes a sip of his drink and pokes Mo Ran's arm. “Now talk it out with him.”

They nod to each other and go on about Chu Wanning’s integrity, Mo Ran’s foolishness, etc... But the gears inside Mo Ran have already begun to twist and turn.

“Of course!” He shouts, spilling his beer all over the table and earning a grimace from Shi Mei. “I just have to make sure Wanning wouldn’t cheat on me if it wasn't me!”

How he didn’t think of it sooner? That's genius.

“... Excuse me?” Shi Mei asks, clearly not having followed Mo Ran's flawless reasoning.

“I just need someone else to hit on Wanning. If he answers, then he is a cheater. If he doesn’t, then our marriage is salvageable.”

“Is your marriage really on the line?” Shi Mei sounds skeptical, but Mo Ran nods in earnest.   

“That depends entirely on Wanning. Mengmeng, come here, I need you to create a fake account and hit on Wanning.”

“What?! Why me?”

“It can’t be me, it has to be someone else.”

“Mo Ran, this is ridiculous! I’m not going to flirt with Chu-laoshi!”

“Come on, just a little. I only need to test something.”

“No way!”

Shi Mei shakes his head, incredulous, as they bicker and push each other, and Mo Ran spills more of his drink on everybody.

“I could do it for you,” he finally suggests. “But of course, if Chu-laoshi answers me back, then it’s fair game, right?” A beat passes, then he tilts his head and smiles sweetly. "I'm just kidding."

… Yeah, as if Mo Ran could trust that smile.

“Xue Meng will do it,” Mo Ran offers a strained smile back, then turns to his cousin again. “Come on, Mengmeng, help me out.”

“No! That’s disrespectful! I won’t!” His darling cousin huffs and crosses his arms, frantically shaking his head.

Mo Ran groans and tosses his head back. “Come onnnnn! I never ask you for any favors,” he cries.

“That is a lie! You're always pestering me!” 

“And you never help me! Just this once, please!”

“I don’t have a fake profile! Not even Chu-laoshi would fall for it if some account created half an hour ago DMed him!”

“Stop shouting," Shi Mei intervenes once again. Mo Ran falls back into his chair and sulks while Xue Meng sticks out his tongue. "I have a fake IG,” Shi Mei informs plainly when they don't resume their shouting match, and both cousins turn to him in surprise. He shrugs. “It’s useful sometimes, like now. Here, you do it.” He unlocks his phone, opens the app, and hands it over to Xue Meng.

“W-What do I do?” He wobbles as if Shi Mei just delivered him a hot potato instead of a smartphone.

“Well, start by following him!” Mo Ran nudges, peeking at Shi Mei’s phone. In a few taps, "Hua Binan" is following Chu Wanning. Then Xue Meng gets stuck again.

“And now?”

“Now you text him!”

“I mean, what do I say, you stupid dog?!”

“Say something like… 'Hey baobei, you’re so hot. Looking for a good time?'”

“That’s too straightforward! And I’m not calling him baobei.”

“Eh, why not?”

“That’s what you call him. Aren’t we trying to pass for someone else?”

“Then exchange baobei for slut, whatever.”

“That’s worse! I’m not calling Chu-laoshi a slut! What the fuck, Mo Ran?!”

“He is into it, do it.”

“Stop. Oversharing,” he says through gritted teeth while Mo Ran rolls his eyes.

Shi Mei sighs loudly and takes his phone back, cutting their squabble short again.

“Wait, wait," Mo Ran bends over the table trying to grab the phone back and stop Shi Mei's, but Shi Mei holds it just out of his reach and keeps typing with only one hand, unperturbed. "Shi Mei, what are you writing?”

He doesn’t answer, just turns the screen to them. Mo Ran squeezes his eyes and makes out the words, “Good night, I’ve been scrolling through your photos and couldn’t help noticing how handsome you are. Hit me up if you’re interested ;)”.

"As expected, Shi Mei always knows what to say," Xue Meng croons while Mo Ran pouts. "... So now we wait?"

“Mn. Chu-laoshi already read it," Shi Mei comments, contemplating the phone with interest.

"Is he typing?" Gripping the table until his knuckles turn white, Mo Ran holds his breath. Shi Mei raises his eyebrow and Mo Ran's heart fails a beat. “What did he say? Hey Shi Mei, what did he say?”

His friend takes his sweet time to answer, taking a long sip of his drink while Mo Ran bounces on his chair. Even Xue Meng tenses in anticipation. Only then Shi Mei takes pity on him and turns his phone screen around again.

“He blocked me.”

Xue Meng visibly relaxes. Mo Ran blinks, incredulous. “Just like that?”

“Yes." Shi Mei nods. "Are you satisfied now?”

“Yeah, Mo Ran," Xue Meng parrots, pretending he wasn't all jittery a few seconds go. "Quit playing around with Chu-laoshi.”

Mo Ran blinks again, still staring at Shi Mei’s phone, wordlessly opening and closing his mouth, and then-- and then he starts to cry his eyes out.

A panicked Xue Meng frets over him, “Why are you crying?! You should be happy! Chu-laoshi is only interested in you and your… Your charm, whatever it is. Stop crying!”

Shi Mei just looks exhausted. “A-Ran, you were never one to cry when drunk,” he mumbles softly.

Mo Ran shakes his head and ignores his friends and the waiter who brings them their food. He fails to suppress another sob and unlocks his phone - it takes him three sloppy tries to get his password right, and even more clumsy attempts to find his chat with Chu Wanning and type him a message. Now that he has stopped causing a scene and getting his beer spilled all over their table, Xue Meng and Shi Mei seem happy to ignore him in return.

It’s only when Wanning's answer arrives that he realizes he accidentally texted from Taxian-jun's account.

Today 20:04

Sent message: miss u 😭😭❤️

Received message: Really?

Received message: 😒

Sent message: ofc, we barely talked today :(

Sent message: say

Sent message: what r u doing now?

Received message: Just lying in bed.

Received message: ...

Received message: Alone.

 

Mo Ran squints at his phone, and mumbles, “Baobei, I have just forgiven you. Don’t test your luck.”

“You said something, A-Ran?”

“Nah, ignore me.”

“Will do,” Xue Meng answers. He's probably glaring too, but Mo Ran is too absorbed to either notice or care.

He rubs his eyes to get rid of a few stray tears and takes a deep breath. The idea that he managed to make Chu Wanning like him not only once, but twice; that he is the only person Wanning is willing to lower his guard to... That counts as something, right? It's flattering, at the very least. Exciting, at best. And he couldn't deny it was delightful to witness how quick Chu Wanning was to block Hua Binan.

Heh, ok, maybe he would indulge Chu Wanning tonight. Tomorrow he would put an end to it and work on fixing his marriage.

Sent message: oh alone did u say?

Sent message: did ur husband leave u all alone on a friday night? 😯

Received message: Yes.

Sent message: u must be so lonely, baobei

Received message: Hm.

Received message: Terribly so.

Sent message: i will keep u company then, ok? <3

Sent message: r u wearing something comfortable?

Received message: Yes.

Sent message: what?

Received message: It’s one of Mo Ran’s shirts.

Sent message: take it off

Received message: What? No.

Sent message: u r wearing his clothes while talking to me?

Sent message: u hurt my feelings, wanning

Sent message: take it off now

Received message: Done...

Sent message: good

Sent message: what r u wearing now?

Received message: Nothing.

Sent message: nothing?

Sent message: 😳😳😳

Sent message: not even ur underwear…?

Received message: Of course I am wearing my underwear! That goes unsaid!

 

“Gosh, he’s terrible at sexting,” Mo Ran laughs - a wet and vulnerable sound -, and gazes lovingly at their chat. “I love him so much.”

“Terrible at…" Xue Meng trails off and takes a sharp intake of breath."MO RAN ARE YOU FUCKING S- sexting CHU-LAOSHI? I THOUGHT YOU WERE MOPING!”

“I’m not sexting him,” Mo Ran replies while pretty much sexting Chu Wanning.

Xue Meng makes a face. “I can’t believe he is-- And right in front of us--!”

“I’m not doing anything.” 

“I am never drinking with you again.”

Shi Mei nods. “I feel like a voyeur,” he comments, twirling a fried shrimp between his fingers.

Mo Ran shrugs.

Sent message: ok ok, i get it hehe

Sent message: lets start by sucking ur fingers wanning

Sent message: until they r nicely wet

Received message: Alright.

Sent message: then i want you to brush ur fingers from your lips down to your chest

Sent message: lick ur fingers again if u have to. get all wet for me, ok??

Sent message: also pinch and twist ur nipples until theyre adorably red

Sent message: did u do it

Sent message: ?

Received message: I am

Received message: Doing it

Sent message: ok great, baobei

 

And then Chu Wanning sends him a picture. Mo Ran has to do a double-take, for he can't quite believe his eyes. But yes, Chu Wanning just sent him a selfie of him lying on their bed, with two fingers on his mouth, flushed cheeks and even showing a pair of glistening, reddened nipples.

Mo Ran wastes a second staring at it, breathless, and the next second he is pushing his chair and getting up.

“I gotta go,” he informs his friends.

“You can’t go, we haven’t eaten yet,” Xue Meng protests.

“Yeah, I gotta go.” He grabs his coat.

“You can’t drive like this,” Shi Mei says.

“I’m getting a cab. Here,” he tosses his keys to Xue Meng. “You can take my car home.”

“Mo Ran!”

Mo Ran leaves without glancing in their direction. He almost knocks on a couple of tables, unwilling to unglue his eyes from his phone while he walks.

Sent message: baobei

Sent message: u r so good

Sent message: amazing

Sent message: u look so so so good

Sent message: beautiful

Sent message: is ur dick hard already?

Received message: What do you think

Received message: ?

Received message: Of course it’s hard.

Received message: I wouldn’t be texting you if it wasn’t

 

Mo Ran chuckles, taking his eyes away from the phone just long enough to spot his cab, getting in the car and greeting the driver. Then he falls against the car seat and desperately turns his attention back to his phone.

Sent message: hahaha no need to get shy

Sent message: ok so touch urself

Sent message: lick ur fingers again

Sent message: and play with ur balls for me, yes?

Sent message: does it feel good? i bet it does

Received message: Hm

Received message: I want...

Sent message: what?

Received message: Don’t make me say it

Sent message: but how will i know if u dont tell me?

Sent message: u have to say it

Received message: ...

Sent message: come on, wanning

Sent message: we don’t have the whole night

Received message: To be fucked

Received message: I want to be fucked

Received message: Happy now?

Sent message: very much

Sent message: too bad u r all alone, baobei

Sent message: do u have some lube around? maybe a toy too?

Received message: I do

Sent message: go get it then

Received message: Ok

Sent message: coat your finger nicely

Sent message: and open up your hole for me, yes?

Sent message: no rush

Sent message: circle your rim, baobei, and then put in a finger

Sent message: gently. as i would do if i was there rn

Sent message: move a bit and get used to it. then add another finger

Sent message: curl them

Sent message: feels good, right?

Sent message: rub that sweet spot of yours

Sent message: r u gasping baobei?

Sent message: u must be making the prettiest sounds

Sent message: id give anything to see u wrecking urself rn

Sent message: ... are u still there?

Received message: Can’t

Received message: Type now

Sent message: yeah i bet u cant lol

Sent message: send me another pic at least

 

It takes him over 5 minutes, but Chu Wanning does send him a picture.

Mo Ran makes a strangled noise and lets his head fall against the passenger seat in front of him.

The driver shoots him a wary glance. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” he manages, taking a deep breath.

“Are you going to throw up?”

“I’m not drunk.”

“Because if you do, that’s a whole extra charge for cleaning.”

“I said I’m not drunk,” he grunts, falling back against his seat. Even if he hadn't sobered up considerably by now, that picture alerted all of his senses. He peeks at it again and curses.

It’s a half blurred photo of Chu Wanning’s parted legs, showing his hole stretched around not one, nor two, but four fingers.

Sent message: baobei i told u to go slow

Sent message: y am i seeing four fucking fingers already

Received message: Didn’t want to wait

 

“Yes, I know how impatient you are,” he whispers to his phone, shaking his head. “I also know you have class tomorrow morning, you reckless oaf.” That’s why he wanted to take it slow. Now Mo Ran is starting to fear exactly which one of their dildos Chu Wanning chose.

He takes a deep breath and taps on the window impatiently. He really couldn’t get home soon enough.

Chu Wanning doesn’t text anything back, which is to be expected considering his current predicament.

It takes around 20 minutes until Mo Ran is unlocking the door to their apartment, and he confirms he is too late to knock some sense into his husband's stubborn head, as he takes in the faint gasps and squelching sounds filling up their house.

Chu Wanning doesn't even notice when Mo Ran walks into their room. Mo Ran, on the other hand, notices two things. One: yes, of fucking course he is using their biggest dildo. Two: he is gripping and nuzzling his face against Mo Ran's shirt.

This sight jolts him into motion, and he rushes to their bed. He may have cursed out loud too, because Wanning suddenly opens his eyes and yelps in surprise. He tries to get up, but only manages to fall on his back, dildo still buried in his ass, mind you.

"What are you doing here?" He hisses.

At this point Mo Ran is already kneeling on the mattress, crouching over Chu Wanning and pulling one of his legs over his shoulder.

“Baobei, did you wait for me to leave so you could have fun alone?” He closes his hand around Chu Wanning’s cock and he gasps. “Ah, I’m so hurt, Wanning.”

“S-shut up,” he grunts, which is Mo Ran’s clue to start thrusting the toy until he is rendered speechless.

“You’re so wet,” he muses, smearing the precum all along Chu Wanning’s length. “How long are you at it, baobei?” He bats his eyelashes innocently as if he doesn’t already know the answer.

Chu Wanning doesn’t dignify him with an answer, too busy filling the room with his beautiful moans.

“Are you such a slut you couldn’t even wait for your husband to come home? Couldn’t wait to get your pretty hole fucked, baobei? Did you have to latch on anyon-- anything?” He corrects himself, clicking his tongue.

Wanning doesn't offer resistance. He trembles and starts rolling his eyes in a way Mo Ran knows too well. He stops stroking him and grips tightly at the base of his cock. “No, no.”

Chu Wanning groans, “Mo Ran, please.”

“Ah, ah,” he mimics Chu Wanning’s little moans as he twists the dildo, and then pulls it out in one go.

He cries out and Mo Ran relishes in both the sound and the sight of Wanning desperately tightening and closing around nothing.

And there goes the last bit of his self-control.

He turns Chu Wanning around, holding him by the waist as he struggles to get on his elbows. Mo Ran unbuckles his belt and lowers his pants just enough to get his cock out and brush it on Wanning’s ass cheeks.

“Where’s the lube?”

“Too far away,” Wanning mumbles, tilting his ass up. “Just do it.”

Granted, there’s still plenty of lube slipping out of his hole. Mo Ran would usually like to be more careful on a weeknight, but seeing as Wanning already stretched his hole excessively...

“Just do it already,” Chu Wanning hisses after Mo Ran takes a minute too long positioning his cock at his entrance.

“Oh?” He strengthens his grip and pulls Chu Wanning back at the same time he slams his hips forward. Chu Wanning chokes and arches his body, and Mo Ran grunts, burying himself in his warmth as deep as possible.

He rolls his hips and Chu Wanning melts under him. Mo Ran nibbles on his ear, purring, "Do you think anyone else could fuck you as good?"

Wanning turns his head, just enough to shoot an annoyed glare. "Aren't you-- a-ah, too full of yourself?"

And really, Mo Ran is doing something wrong if Chu Wanning can still put on this act. Humming, he pulls Wanning's hair until he is forcefully arching his neck and adjusts his thrusts enough to draw out some choked sobs

"I personally think that you were made to take my cock. Look how well you suck me in. So greedy, baobei.”

“Sh-- ah! Sham--nngh--”

“Shameless, yes,” he provides, grunting in his ear.

It’s easy to get lost in Chu Wanning, the way he comes undone under Mo Ran, each breath a pained sound, his fingers curling and uncurling around the bedsheets; the way he so eagerly takes in everything Mo Ran has to give him. He is only half teasing when he says Chu Wanning's body was made for him.

But, despite the pleasure that threatens to cloud his senses, he hasn't forgotten what brought them here.

“Wanning, who do you belong to?” He prompts, pulling his hair again and licking his neck.

Chu Wanning’s response is but an unintelligible grumbling.

“Come on, baobei, tell me.” He searches for Chu Wanning’s cock and gives it a soft stroke. “I’m waiting.”

It takes a tortuous slow drag of his hips for his husband to whine, "Ah, it’s you, Mo Ran. I’m yours. Please.”

“Good,” Mo Ran groans, sinking his teeth on his lovely neck and rewarding him by fastening the pace of his wrist. “You’re all mine, Wanning, all mine.”

“Yes, yes,” he says, over and over again until it turns into a meaningless moaning, while Mo Ran works him through his orgasm and he spills all over the sheets.

Wanning turns limp beneath him, a couple of tears rolling down his cheek, gasping soft ah's every time Mo Ran aggressively pushes his hips forward. It's overwhelming - Chu Wanning's appearance, his noises, and even his scent. It doesn't take much longer before Mo Ran shudders and comes, filling up Wanning nicely while showering him with senseless rambling - sweet nothings, praises, a remark or two about breeding him… The usual.

Later, it takes a lot of coaxing to get Wanning out of the bed and into the shower. It takes even more coaxing to make him sit in the kitchen while Mo Ran prepares them a quick dinner, which he only really agrees to when Mo Ran himself admits to being hungry.

They snuggle on the couch after eating their omelets - their bed too much of a filthy mess and Wanning insists those were the last clean bedsheets they had, since they postponed their laundry due to the rainy weather. Mo Ran is too tired to go check, but it doesn't matter. They will deal with it tomorrow.

Chu Waning hlies on top of him, gazing at him with soft, adoring eyes, and Mo Ran can’t help grinning. This look - this warmth and love - is only his, and that’s enough. Whatever it is that their marriage is going through, they can work it out.

Tomorrow. 

 

 


 

 

That’s what he intended to, at least.

But what actually happens is this:

He postpones this conversation for when they both get home in the evening - there’s simply not enough time in the morning and it absolutely cannot be done through text throughout the day. It is only logical to do it in the privacy of their home, and with plenty of time for them to digest it and go through everything during the weekend.

However, he should’ve known better by now. Mo Ran is… Not to be trusted when left on his own.

It’s still the middle of the morning and he’s slacking off while planning his speech, trying to make it the more appeasing and apologetic possible. It is just damage control at this point, but he still tries. He even tried to get Xue Meng’s help, but his cousin only tossed his car keys on his face and refused to listen to a word he said.

So there he is, drafting his speech all by himself when he gets to the point everyone kept repeating: that Chu Wanning would never take things to the next level and have an actual, in-person affair.

Mo Ran smiles, nodding to himself, and jumps to the next bullet point. And then pauses.

Chu Wanning wouldn’t, obviously. He would never.

He wouldn’t.

… So there’s no harm in just making sure of it, right? Right.

Sent message: baobei

Sent message: last night got me thinking

Sent message: we should meet in person

 

It takes almost an hour for Wanning to answer, and Mo Ran stares obsessively at his phone all the while - he’s come to terms with the fact that he'll be skipping lunch to get on with the late work.

Received message: What?

Sent message: we should meet

Sent message: im dying to see u wanning

Sent message: to finally touch u

Sent message: to taste u

Sent message: pls baobei

Sent message: there’s a nice restaurant in that hotel close to the university u work

Sent message: i could make us a reservation for tonight

Sent message: u make up some excuse for ur husband or whatever

Sent message: and we get to enjoy ourselves for a little while

Sent message: say yes baobei, pls <3

Sent message: i will treat u so good ;)

 

He re-reads his texts, satisfied. Truth be told, this isn’t even putting Wanning to test, really.

First, making it a last-minute arrangement - Wanning despises those.

Second, the location - being so close to his workplace, it is clearly a no-no for any illicit activities.

See? Too easy for him to say no.

He watches with amusement as Wanning types and types for endless minutes, wondering how he will choose to refuse it. Will he offer some excuse? Will he actually be offended by the suggestion? Will he give up on answering and simply block him?

“Come on, Wanning,” Mo Ran chuckles watching the appearing and disappearing dots.

And then Chu Wanning sends his answer.

 

 


 

 

“He said yes! He said yes!” Mo Ran wails, slumped on the couch of Shi Mei’s living room, a poor, cruel parody from when he rejoiced with those same words years ago. His friend watches him with a concerned expression from the other side of the room.

Wanning had, in fact, agreed to Taxian-jun’s proposition and said to leave the reservation to him. And then he sent Mo Ran a text saying he would go out for dinner with a few colleagues tonight. He didn't even bother to call Mo Ran, only sending a cold, indifferent text.

Mo Ran had paled and paralyzed upon reading it, and when Xuanji walked to his desk to ask for a client file, he paled in turn and urged Mo Ran to take the rest of the day out to rest.

He left the building still at a loss and, not knowing what to do with himself, he made his way to Shi Mei’s house, got in with his spare keys, and cried his eyes out on his couch while eating all the snacks he could find in his kitchen. And that was how Shi Mei found him when he got home a few hours later.

"A-Ran, I didn't want to say this yesterday, but this was the stupidest idea you ever had," is the first thing Shi Mei says once Mo Ran stops speaking.

He went for Shi Mei directly because he wanted to be comforted without having to deal with Xue Meng's shit. However, he forgot that not only does Shi Mei balance him and Xue Meng out, preventing their fights from escalating, Xue Meng also has an important role in maintaining their friendship's harmony: his presence is the only thing that keeps Shi Mei in check and stops him from being… Well, vicious is a good word.

It's been like this ever since Mo Ran snapped out of that sickly sweet crush that put Shi Mei and his every action in a pedestal - and so Shi Mei didn't have to put up with his wagging tail with a strained smile while trying to keep him at an arm's length. Their relationship had gotten a lot more honest, then. Brutally so, on Shi Mei's part.

"Wanning is going to cheat on me!" he repeats.

"With yourself. What do you want me to say?"

"Don't you understand, Shi Mei? He's cheating on me. It's not only some arguably harmless texting anymore, Wanning will meet with Taxian-jun--"

"You."

“-- and will cheat on me!"

"With you."

"Yes, yes, with me. Which he doesn't know, so big difference. It's a matter of principle." Mo Ran growls in anger and then it turns into a sobbing fit again.  

"Ok," Shi Mei sighs and sits beside him, "you found out Chu-laoshi would cheat on you. So what about it?"

"What do you mean 'so what'? I will--"

"You'll break up with him?” Shi Mei cuts him off, arching his eyebrow. “You're telling me you're going to break up with Chu Wanning?"

"Of course! I--" 

"You managed to marry Chu Wanning, and now you'll divorce him. Is that what you're saying?"

Mo Ran straightens up, opening his mouth indignantly- only to falter under Shi Mei's cold gaze.

Of course, he would divorce Wanning, now that he knew he was a cheating scum! He didn't ever want to see Chu Wanning's face again!

Granted, it wouldn't be easy at first, but it was for the best. He lived a whole life without Chu Wanning, he could learn how to do it again. He could easily do without the stupid fights born from their stubbornness, without Chu Wanning's clothes and trinkets scattered all over the house every single day, and without his self-imposed ban on spicy food. He would have to settle for an "average, totally not mind-blowing, Wanning-less" sex life. Not ideal, but he could do it. Then it was only a matter of getting used to Chu Wanning's absence in his daily life: sleeping without him clinging to Mo Ran every night; never again tasting those wontons folded with so much care; never again getting to hear those occasional laughing fits ending with a snort, that Wanning always pretended didn't come from him--

His stomach sinks and a new wave of tears assault his eyes.

"No, I--," he chokes, shaking his head vigorously. "God, no, I can't break up with him!"

"I thought so." Shi Mei rubs his eyes and doesn't even try to hide his yawn. "See? That's why I said it's stupid. I don't know what you expected with this 'test', honestly, since breaking up was never a real option. The only difference is that now instead of living in blissful ignorance you have to live with the knowledge that Chu-laoshi would cheat on you."

With you, he adds, but Mo Ran ignores him and sobs.

"He must be on his way to the restaurant now. Wanning, why?"

“Oh…" Shi Mei pauses, cocking his head. "It’s tonight? He told me he had plans with you tonight.”

“Fucking liar,” he roars. "He's not even good at it! I could so easily find out simply by talking to you!"

Shi Mei hums. “Show me Taxian-jun's chat with him. I want to see something.”

Mo Ran hesitates. "I don't know... There's some stuff there..."

“Gross. I don’t wanna know. Just let me see how it started.”

Mo Ran scrolls up the conversation and gives it to Shi Mei, who reads it silently. After a couple of minutes, he gives a long, suffering sigh. He doesn't exactly roll his eyes, but it feels like he does.

"Get the hell out," he deadpans, kicking him from the couch. Mo Ran starts to complain, but Shi Mei raises a hand and signals him to shut up. "Look A-Ran, I'm really stressed with my thesis, I don't even remember the last time I napped for longer than 20 minutes, and this situation is unnerving, pathetic and so fucking ridiculous." He drags Mo Ran through his room while Mo Ran protests to no avail. "Sorry, I can't pamper you right now. Go meet Chu-laoshi and get your shit sorted out. Bye."

With that, he closes his door to Mo Ran's face with a resounding "bam".

 

 


 

 

"Good night," Chu Wanning greets him without much of a change in his expression. Not even a flicker of surprise.

Oh, he's good. Mo Ran is familiar with his expertise in concealing his emotions, but to think he'd be so perfectly composed even in this kind of situation...

Mo Ran takes the chair and gracefully sits, eyeing Chu Wanning like a predator would to his prey. He has calmed down considerably on his way here. However, while he is making peace with the fact that divorce is not an option, it's not like he intends to let Wanning off the hook so easily. Oh, absolutely not. He just hasn't made his mind about what exactly he wants to do yet.

"I ordered pear blossom wine," Chu Wanning informs as if nothing is wrong.

Mo Ran rests his elbows on the table and considers him. "So, Wanning, what brings you here?"

"Don't you already know? I--," he clears his throat and looks away. "I booked a room in the hotel for tonight."

It stings how matter of factly he is about it. "You won't even try to deny it?" Mo Ran raises his chin and grins, showing his teeth. "That you're a lying cheater?"

"Here's your wiiiiine," the waitress pops at their table the moment Mo Ran ends his sentence, and she drags on the last word in a high-pitched squeal, looking from Mo Ran to Chu Wanning with startled eyes.

"Mo Ran!" Chu Wanning hisses, and it's satisfying to finally force some reaction out of him. "Just leave it here, thank you. We'll order in a moment." The woman leaves, stealing glances as she walks away, and Wanning turns back at him with his death glare. "What are you doing?!"

"Ah, sorry. You're ashamed? Is the great Chu Wanning afraid others will find out about the cheating scum he really is?"

"I am not--"

"'You are not' what, Wanning? Cheating on me? Because it looks like I caught you red-handed, baobei." He crosses his arms and waits.

Chu Wanning frowns. "I thought I was going to meet Taxian-jun, not Mo Ran," he admits, tentatively.

Mo Ran laughs, openly and loud, "And wouldn't you like that, Wanning? Did you like the idea of being fucked by a stranger while I sat and waited for you at home? Did you like to feel like a little whore, Wanning?"

"S-shameless," Wanning says through gritted teeth, fists balling on the table cloth, and looking away. 

His cheeks and ears are painted red and there's a glassy layer in his eyes and Mo Ran realizes-- He realizes that Chu Wanning not only likes it. He's aroused by it.

And the sight would be arousing to Mo Ran too, in the way everything about Chu Wanning is enticing. Maybe it would be exciting, he thinks, the adrenaline of having an affair with Chu Wanning, meeting him in secret and stolen time and--

But the truth is that he is the one being cheated on here, and he can't keep up with it anymore. His eyes fill up with tears and he barks a cold, humorless laugh.

"Well surprise, I already knew about it. It was me the whole time. I was Taxian-jun."

He waits for Chu Wanning's surprise, which never comes. The silence stretches for a minute too long, until Wanning eventually says, "Is this… Is this still part of the scene?"

"... What?"

Chu Wanning tightens his lips, exasperated. "The scene," he clarifies. Except it doesn't clarify anything to Mo Ran, who stares at him blankly until Chu Wanning gets angry. "You know I've never done anything like this before! Do you know how much stuff I had to google?" Mo Ran doesn't, in fact, and shakes his head. It only aggrieves Wanning further. "Well, you should know. And you keep changing the script unpromptedly too! I thought we were going for the affair thing, then you showed up as the angry husband and now you're acting as if it was you all along. Is there anything else I should prepare for?"

“Wanning… What-" Mo Ran takes a deep breath and tries to grasp what the hell is going on. "First things first. What do you think we’re doing?”

“Is it a catch? We're roleplaying,” he affirms confidently, but then his certainty starts to waver. “… Right? That’s why you created that stupid account.”

Mo Ran gasps in turn. “You knew it was me?”

“Was I not supposed to?” Chu Wanning massages his temples. “You-- Mo Ran, you messaged me in front of me, right after you saw my stories in your other account, texting exactly the way you usually do and saying the same thing you said about that picture the other day. How was I not supposed to know?”

“I thought you didn’t!” He says, lamely, slowly beginning to feel like the most foolish person alive.

“Why would I be texting back if I didn’t know it was you?!" Chu Wanning roars and Mo Ran makes a panicked sound. He insists, "What was the point of you texting if you thought I didn’t know?!”

Mo Ran sinks in his seat at the same time realization sinks in for Chu Wanning, and his expression morphs into one of complete, utter rage.

“Mo Ran!” He shouts - kinda. He is still very considerate of the people around them. Mo Ran recoils nonetheless.

“Wanning, baobei--”

“Don't 'baobei' me!" He snaps Mo Ran's hands away, mercilessly. "Unbelievable! Were you testing me? Have you no shame?! I never thought you could be this infantile, Mo Weiyu!”

Oh no, they’re on a “Mo Weiyu” basis now. Mo Ran whimpers, “Wanning, please--”

“Ridiculous! How could you even think that of me? I..." Then, all at once, Wanning deflates and his eyes redden. "I know I am not the most expressive and affectionate person, but I thought..."

“Baobei, no!” Mo Ran jumps to his knees, not giving a damn if they’ll cause a scene or not, and forcefully takes Chu Wanning’s hands into his own. “Wanning, look at me, you are perfect! You are the best husband I could ever wish for.  This is all my fault. It was only supposed to be a silly joke, I never thought you would ever cheat me. But then you answered back, and so my mind spiraled out of control, and uhhhggg you know how stupid I am.”

Instead of the usual, reassuring, “you’re not stupid, Mo Ran,” Wanning nods. 

“Yes,” he sniffs. “So fucking stupid.”

“Baobei, forgive me,” he cries, holding firmly to Chu Wanning’s hands while the latter tries to free them. “I’m so sorry, you didn’t deserve this. I just got carried away by those old, stupid insecurities, and you’re so good, Wanning, so much more than I deserve. I thought it was only a matter of time until you got tired of me--”

“Stop being so dense, Mo Ran,” he spits, ceasing his attempts to break free at last. “You should know by now that I love you and that I’m not leaving you ever." Mo Ran perks up, relief washing over him, and Chu Wanning frowns. “Well, actually, I am leaving you now."

He stands up abruptly, knocking Mo Ran's balance off and causing him to fall in his ass.

"I'm taking a cab home. You pay the bill."

It seems every other table has paused their dinner to watch them, and even their waitress peeks from the kitchen door, whispering with two other boys.

"Wait," Mo Ran scrambles to his feet. “Wait, baobei, am I forgiven?”

Chu Wanning continues to walk out of the venue with resolute steps. He doesn't look back when he says, “You’re sleeping on the couch for a month.”

 

 

 

(Half an hour later, at the car:

“So,” Mo Ran breaks the silence with a tentative glance at Chu Wanning, who’s pouting as he pointedly glares at his window, after Mo Ran chased and dragged him to their car. “The roleplaying thing.”

Wanning’s sharp eyes turn at him, fuming. “Don't.”

“That’s really hot.”

“Mo Ran.”

“We should do it for real another time.”

“Stop.”

“I mean, it’s sexy as fuck."

"I said stop."

"Damn, Wanning being so desperate to be Taxian-jun’s cock slut, while his husband--”

“Mo Ran, shut up!”)

 

 

 

(A week later, at Shi Mei’s apartment:

“And that’s what happened. He thought it was a sex thing, haha.”

“Please, please, stop oversharing," Xue Meng groans, pushing his take-out away with a grimace. "I am literally begging.”

“Hmm.” Shi Mei nods and takes another gracious bite of his noodles. “Yeah, I suspected he knew it was you when you showed me the texts.”

“... Why didn’t you say anything?”

Shi Mei meets his eyes with a raised eyebrow, and of course, Mo Ran knows. Because Mo Ran caught him in a bad day; because he wished to see how far Mo Ran's clownery would go, never mind the major crisis he was going through; because his childhood friend was a bit of an asshole just for the sake of it sometimes. All of those are equally valid answers - and the truth probably lies somewhere in the middle. However, since Xue Meng is there with them, cluelessly staring at them, Shi Mei puts on one of his sweet, apologetic smiles instead and says, “Mn, I couldn’t be sure, so I didn’t want to give you false hope.” 

“Anyhow," Mo Ran claps his hands, overlooking Shi Mei's scheming tendencies, and smiles again, "all that matters is that Wanning and I are good.” He paces around the dinner table, giddy. “Better than ever, actually!”

Before he can launch on another monologue about how amazing of a husband Chu Wanning is, his phone beeps, at the other end of the table. Xue Meng, being the closest, grabs it. “It’s Chu-laoshi,” he comments, but before extending his hand to Mo Ran, he makes the mistake of glancing at it. He hesitates, frowning. “He's texting… Taxian-jun? I thought you just said this was all over?”

Maybe it’s the wolfish grin Mo Ran gives, or his earlier “a sex thing” remark, but Xue Meng turns a couple of shades redder and throws Mo Ran's smartphone at him. He drops his head to the table, with a pained groan. Shi Mei taps his shoulder, in a weak attempt to comfort him.

Mo Ran giggles to himself while texting his baobei back.)

Notes:

thank u jc, for your brain and for letting me write my take on this amazing idea! i've been laughing so much at mr's stupid ass! i deviated a bit from the original tweet but ahh i hope u can find it funny <3 ((also, pls guess what game ive been picturing cwn playing on his phone 🤡 hahahaha💕