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Both of them knew it had to happen eventually. It was a hard truth that Tegan had faced more than enough that one’s travels with the Doctor would eventually come to an end. She had herself once flown the coop and quickly realized how much of a mistake that had been. Now here she was, alone in the TARDIS with the Doctor and Turlough for company, watching the central pillar rise and fall slowly as they left Nyssa on board a leper ship to do what she does best: Heal people.
Tegan felt slightly sick that Turlough had somehow wormed his way into the Doctor’s good graces. Couldn’t he see how shady Turlough was? The boy was hiding in a
school
for god’s sake.
Her hands curled into fists, and she broke off from the hypnotic way the TARDIS was moving and stalked back to her room. Tears welled in her eyes when she saw a picture of herself, Nyssa, Adric, and the Doctor sitting on her bedside table. She sat down, picking up the photograph and running her hand over it. “It’s just us now,” She murmured to herself miserably.
“I wouldn’t quite put it like that,” She jumped in alarm when the Doctor sat down next to her, wondering how in the hell he managed to do that. Gently, he took the picture from her and smiled fondly at it, before putting it back. “They’re not gone forever, at least not entirely.”
“Easy for you to say,” She shot back bitterly, although they both knew that she wasn’t upset at him. “You have a time machine, you can go back and… and see them whenever you want.”
A small little smile flickered across the Doctor’s face before it vanished and he shook his head. “I could, I suppose. But that would defeat the point of having fond memories wouldn’t it?” He kept his hands clasped in front of him, as if he was debating how to best comfort her. “Nyssa and Adric… you’ll always have the memories of them with you Tegan. In that sense, they’re just as alive as if they were here.”
“But they’re
not
here Doctor.” Tegan said, frowning heavily despite herself. “Adric’s…” She paused, not wanting to reopen that old wound. She knew it wasn’t the Doctor’s fault after all. “And Nyssa’s on a leper ship for goodness sake! It could be dangerous! It-”
The Doctor cut her off, gently but firmly. “Was her own decision, Tegan.” He sighed, reaching out and gently grabbing her hands with his. “I know it was hard to say goodbye to her Tegan, believe me I know. I didn’t want her to go either but it was her choice and we have to respect that.” He gave her a small, hopeful smile. “She’s a strong soul, after all.”
She found herself nodding in agreement with him, squeezing his hands for comfort. “I just worry about her, and about you.” She was a bit surprised about how forthright she was about her feelings but found she didn’t care enough to stop this time. “I don’t trust Turlough, Doctor. I know that for some reason you do but he’s clearly hiding something important, always looking shiftily at you when he thinks no one’s watching.”
Her words died on her lips for a moment, before she took a breath and forced herself to continue. “I… I don’t want to lose you too, Doctor.” She sniffed, wiping her eyes a bit.
The Doctor was quiet for a moment, holding a handkerchief for Tegan to wipe her eyes on. “I know, Tegan. And you have perfectly good reasons not to trust him. But he’s clearly troubled by something and… I want to give him the benefit of the doubt. As for losing me…” He let a small chuckle escape him. “I’m more worried about losing
you
Tegan.”
Wrapping his arm around her, he pulled her in for a warm but still sort of awkward hug. Neither of them were the most touchy-feely of people but Tegan found herself holding him tightly anyways. “Why would you be afraid of losing me? All I am… is a mouth on legs.”
He sighed a bit, rubbing small circles into her back. “You’re much more than that to me Tegan. I don’t know if you’ll believe me right now but..” They broke apart, the Doctor standing up and flashing Tegan a warm smile, his eyes sparkling a bit. “Shall we see what Turlough is up to? Give him a good old fright before getting a bite to eat. How does…” He paused, thinking for a moment. “Breakfast sound? I know this fantastic spot in the Andromeda galaxy, the Milky Way Swirl Pancakes are to die for.”
Tegan couldn’t help her exasperated eye roll at the Doctor’s blatant attempts to cheer her up, but she couldn’t help but smile anyways. Taking his arm, she opened the door to her room. “You know what Doctor? That sounds really nice.” Together, they walked out of the room, leaving the memories behind them. For now.