Chapter Text
"What are you wearing?"
Dean glances into the living room, where Sam's sitting on the couch doing his homework, then moves into the bathroom, shutting the door firmly and locking it. "Hello to you to, asshole."
"Don't be like that, baby." Cas' voice sounds tinny through the phone, uncomfortably distant, but Dean can still picture him with perfect clarity: leaning on his elbows against the counter in his bookstore, joint hanging out of the corner of his mouth, hair probably a mess. He's also definitely smirking at the flustered tone in Dean's voice.
"I regret giving you this number," Dean sighs, though he really doesn't. Even when he's high off his ass and doing his best to make Dean uncomfortable, it's good to hear from Cas.
When Dean left things were kind of up in the air, and he still isn't sure what exactly they are to each other. 'Friends' doesn't quite seem to encompass it. Mostly, he tries not to think about it too hard.
"I saw a bee earlier," Cas says. "It reminded me of you."
"Thanks, dude."
"I like bees," Cas adds, clearly picking up on Dean's sarcasm. "They're beautiful."
Dean is very grateful Cas isn't there to see how red he's turning. "Did you call just to harass me?"
Cas laughs. Then he goes quiet for a while, and Dean starts to wonder whether he's forgotten he's on the phone (which has happened, a couple of times. Cas is rarely sober when he calls, which is more troubling than Dean is willing to admit).
"I miss you," he finally says.
"Oh," Dean says. He runs a hand through his hair, feeling suddenly awkward. "Um. Me too."
It's weird, because as much as they've talked (and they've talked a lot, much more than Dean expected when he first called Cas three days after they left Milliken) they've never really acknowledged the distance between them. It's just there, the big honking elephant in the room.
Dean clears his throat. "I, uh, I need to go. Get dinner ready for Sammy."
"Of course."
"Talk to you later?"
"Of course," Cas repeats, a little softer.
*
This is a bad idea.
Cas doesn't even know he's coming. Dean somehow got it in his head that showing up unannounced would be a nice surprise, but during these last twenty miles he's been growing increasingly doubtful. What if Cas doesn't want to see him?
This is definitely a bad idea, but Dean didn't drive half-way across the country just to turn around on Cas' doorstep, so before he can talk himself out of it he enters the bookstore.
A bell chimes as Dean enters. There is a girl sitting at the counter and she doesn't even look up from the book she's reading to say, "We're closed."
"I'm not here to shop," Dean says, thrown off by this stranger. But it's been a year since he left, so what did he expect? For everything to stay the same? "I'm here to see Cas."
The girl looks up, and Dean is struck by how much she looks like Cas; dark hair, bright blue eyes. Hell, she's even got the same frown. "Who are you?"
"Dean Winchester."
The girl's eyes widen in recognition. "Oh!" She looks over her shoulder, then back to Dean. "Castiel is doing inventory. I'll go get him."
She disappears into the backroom, leaving Dean standing awkwardly by himself in the middle of the store. A couple of moments later she's back, with Cas trailing behind her.
"Dean."
Cas' voice sounds somehow impossibly deeper and raspier than it ever did over the phone, and it sends shivers down Dean's spine. He wants to leap forward and grab onto him, and never let go.
Instead, he raises his hand in a small wave. "Hey."
Cas glances at the girl, who nods once and retreats into the backroom.
"Not that I'm not happy to see you," Cas says, "but what are you doing here?"
Dean shrugs. "Just passing through, thought I'd drop by."
"Passing through? Where are you headed?"
"...Stanford," Dean admits.
Cas grins at that, and Dean can feel himself starting to blush. Cas has his number down, always did, and Dean isn't sure if he's comfortable with that or not. It makes him want to be honest, to lay himself bare. To tell Cas any number of things he's been thinking since he entered the bookstore: that he missed him, that he's barely gone a day without thinking of him in the past year, that he wishes he could stay.
But of course he's not gonna say any of that.
"Do you wanna grab a bite?"
Cas' grin widens. "Sure."
Somehow, it feels like Cas heard it anyway.