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Felix remembered the first time he tried to kill himself, he even remembers what it felt like to try and hang yourself in the dark while your kids and wife slept. Still single, Felix would always go on top of the building and look down and want to land on the ground and crack his skull or HELL even break his spine.
Felix, alone and broken, stood at the edge of the balcony, wondering “should I do it, should I jump?” thought Felix feeling the cold air on himself. “Felix?” He turned and saw it was his pal Oscar. Oscar was single and enjoyed it, but missed his kid a lot which pulled his heart strings just a little too much.
“You alright Felix, what the hell you doing on the edge of my building?” asked Oscar. Oscar never showed his feelings as much, but deep down he loved Felix and worried he could hang himself in the kid’s bathroom. “Come on down and play some poker with your love bug, the boys left so that means we get some free time.” Felix kept looking down where he saw people walking and some staring.
“I’ll be down in a minute, just, just want some time alone alright.” Oscar went up and pulled his arm “I can’t see you like this, come on down” Felix huffed and got off the ledge. “Plus you need to bathe, you smell worse than my ex-wife’s homemade lasonia.” While Felix was getting undressed, Oscar saw he was struggling with his clothes “here.” Oscar went up and helped him get undressed.
While Felix sat in the tub, Oscar started to scrub his back. Oscar looked at his back, and saw the many scars Felix did to himself. He remembered getting the call from Francis on how Felix wanted to kill himself, he even remembered the time his friend Murphy got a hold of a nearby hospital. Felix was lucky enough to not be in a facility and was lucky enough to be right next to him.
He even saw the scars on his ribs and wrists, and the self bruising. “I love you Felix, you need anything I’m right here, you know that don’t you?” Felix nodded and just sat in the tub while Oscar kept scrubbing him. After the shower Felix just sat alone in his room with nothing but a desk lamp and a stuffed rabbit his daughter mailed for him. “Felix? It’s Oscar, I got dinner.” No answer, Oscar started to get worried and scared he might do something that could end his life. He knocked and opened the door slowly
“Can I come in?” Felix just sat on his bed looking down at his hands. “I remember the first time I tried to kill myself. It was Wednesday, when my wife told me we were getting a divorce I took it upon myself to hurt the hands that helped me stand up, that helped me learn how to cook and clean. But now these hands belong to a suicidal OCD bitch who thinks life isn’t fucking FAIR!” Felix kicked the trashcan and stood up, “Felix, you’re not a bitch, an OCD nut-ball I’ll just say but you’re the reason I’m not alone, you’re the reason why I still have a chance with my kid. I love you Felix, you’re not alone.” Oscar turned Felix’s body around and hugged him tightly. Felix had his hands tightly around Oscar and he cried on his shoulder “I hate being alone.” Felix said “let it out, just let it out.” Oscar kissed Felix, making Felix hug Oscar tighter. “Remember our first dance cowboy?” Felix nodded and smiled a bit, “I’ll let you take the lead this time.”