Work Text:
very nervous and love
aka How Emily fell in love with Daryl Dixon
aka How Norman created bethyl
maybeobsessed
30 Days without an Accident
Norman was always a very affectionate person. It became very easy to put aside the thought that any of his touches meant something. Literally everyone has had the pleasure of his hard arms wrapping around them or his tongue wet against their cheeks. There wasn’t much a difference between friends and strangers when it came to hugs and kisses, except if they knew him, they would experience it more often. The lack of personal space is a given when it comes to Norman. But there wasn’t a person in the world who would ever say they hated the affection. Well, maybe after Steven’s had a bit too much too drunk and turns into a grumpy old man, mumbling in a corner in his native language about how Norman’s kisses are too wet and how his slobber isn’t good for his skin (Steven’s brother had translated it for them when Steven pushed Norman away after Norman had tried to cuddle up with him). Norman would just laugh it off and move on to the next victim, all the while his beer and cigarette sloshing around in one hand. Besides a drunk Steven, everyone welcomed the touches and thought nothing of it.
After knowing Norman for a couple of years, filming with him one on one was easy. Especially when it came to intimate scenes, like hugging and hand holding, which was new for his character Daryl. It was actually much harder for Norman to act like he was uncomfortable with it. So when it came to the time for Beth and Daryl’s first hug, it was really easy to slide her arms around his slim waist, press her head against his hard chest, and breathe into his sleeveless button up that smelled much better than it looked. At first they discussed that he wouldn’t touch her which would make it easier for Norman to express his discomfort but with Nicotero yelling at him to “touch her arm!”, Norman could only comply. She felt his fingers grip her elbow through her sweater but it was so delicate and soft it made her throat dry. It was so painfully Daryl to be wary of the situation but reciprocate in the only way he could. It was so painfully not Norman to be the minimalist when it comes to hugs. So this simple touch on her elbow was the first time her heart had raced when it came to Norman.
When she pulled away from the hug and looked him in the eyes for a brief moment, his warm blue gaze was almost too much. A world’s away from Norman’s playful bright blue eyes. His eyes never leave her and she was the one to nervously shift away feeling a strange sense of intimacy as he watched her pull her sweater back over her shoulder. She gave him one last look before Nicotero is calling cut and suddenly Norman is back raising his hand up in the air. It took her a second to figure he was looking for a high five and softly places her hand against his.
“That felt good.” His voice is back to normal and no longer the gruff tone of Daryl. It never fails to amaze her how easily he could switch between voices. She nods in agreement and he guides her to the playback tv. It turned out to be pretty good but Emily found herself hoping for a second run. A second chance to see Daryl’s warm eyes looking down at her, to feel the brush of his gruff voice saying “me too” against her hair, and to have that soft pressure of his fingers on her elbow. A second chance to maybe feel that flutter in her stomach once again.
Still
It’s months before she and Norman get to work together again. They start a month earlier than filming for their three episode arc, going over lines through Facetime with Jude. Norman is his normal self, finding different ways to make her laugh and constantly shake her head. Norman really did love goofing around, playing with apps in the group chat to add little hats on their head as they went over the script. Jude always went along with it because the minute he asks them to recite their lines, the look on Norman’s face changes and suddenly he’s Daryl.
The first time he does it in that chat, Emily almost gets stuck on her own lines from how much it caught her off guard. It’s like Daryl creeps over him slowly, starting from his shoulders and moving up. Norman’s usually loose posture gets tense. His shoulders fall back and his neck straightens. The top of his head tilts forward and his chin falls back, his lips tight and his eyes looking at them through his fringe. He stared right into the camera and it was as if he was looking right at her, and her heart started to race. It was odd, there Daryl was clad in one of Norman’s old rock shirts. Definitely not an image she could easily erase.
“Emmy?” Jude asked. “You ready?”
She clears her throat, looking away for a moment to gather herself.
“Motorcycle mechanic...”
x
The first time Norman makes Emily feel nervous is when they film the moonshine scene. They were rehearsing the scene in their costumes one last time before recording, and Norman is sitting in front of her looking down at the makeshift table between them. He’d been avoiding her gaze since they first sat down. She could see his fingers twitching against his pants and his chin bobbing up and down, a habit of Dary’s, biting down on his lower lip. She forced herself to stop watching him to prepare herself for this intense scene. Beth is pretty loose in this scene but at the same time jittery and she is just about the flip the tension and make it extremely awkward between them.
The first few lines go well and she can feel the tension building. Daryl is already so uncomfortable in his skin, looking up and down and at her through his fringe. He’s rubbing the hairs on his chin and speaking softly. His voice is heavy and grunting. Just as she delivers the line that even makes her feel uncomfortable, she locks eyes with Norman and suddenly the air shifts. He is looking at her dead in the eyes and coldness of his glare sends goosebumps down her arms. In that moment, she really wants to take it back. Everything she just said and then apologize profusely but Beth doesn’t back down and easily passes over the hard stare without a hitch. Everything in his body is frigid, his eyes no longer that warm blue but more of a black ice. She holds back a shiver and the feeling of dread deep in her stomach.
“Is that what you think of me?”
It’s enough to make her hate herself. That line. But she pushes on as Beth does, even as the feeling in the air suffocates her. She knows where this is going and what its leading up. That doesn’t stop her from feeling real fear in her heart, afraid that she has now made Daryl Dixon hate her. It is never a fear of him hurting her, but the fear of hurting him that overcomes her. Even as Jude yells to stop, Norman gives her one last glare before turning to look away from her.
As the crew sets up to film, she sits there in fear of having to experience that whole thing all over again. Having to experience the nerves of Daryl’s hateful stare. Because Norman would never make her feel that way. Norman with his goofy grins could never make her nervous like the way Daryl Dixon could. Except where was Norman now? She wonders, as the offstandish aura of Daryl seeps from Norman’s skin.
x
They’ve been over this scene maybe half a thousand times. Rehearsal has always been mechanic despite Norman is yelling and Emily is yelling back. They rehearse the motions and the timing. Daryl speaks, Beth speaks, Daryl points and yells, Beth straightens her back and quietly but firmly takes her turn. They push and pull and Daryl turns (something recently added on, a progression into the back hug) and Beth hugs. The movements are so ingrained into them, it allows their physicality to be second nature and then the acting happens. Only once it happened that the scene had been rehearsed as it would’ve been filmed, the tears evident on Norman’s face. But when the day of shooting came upon them, Norman hadn’t even greeted her on set. They haven’t spoken or even looked in each other’s direction. That helps her channel her anger, the lack of Norman’s usual affection. Instead his back faces her up until they are to film and she feels hurt. After filming with Norman for some time, she learned very quickly that Norman creates the atmosphere on the set. It is something that helped her ease into her role many times. Her acting with Norman has stemmed from reacting to him. And she admires him for it.
They decide they will not rehearse before filming, so the first time she faces him, it’s in front of the camera and her nerves are on end. She is nervous and its helps irregulate her breathing. He looks down at her, tight lipped and jaw locked. Daryl is here, and Daryl is angry. The aura around him is chaotic and on fire. The only control was in his eyes glaring down on her. In the back of her heart, she wants to look away and apologize once again. Emily often finds herself thinking about how Daryl has come to be the way he is, this anger brewing from years of torment and then recent years of losing ones he fought so hard to protect. It isn’t hard to want to take him in her arms and shield Daryl from that pain he clings to keep him grounded. But Beth is different. Beth will go toe to toe with Daryl and take down his monsters in the only way he knows. She fights his raging fires with her own fire, a burning heat disguised into a deceiving, controlled blue flame. She sticks her chin out and is determined to gain dominance.
When Jude yells action, she steps up first, shoulders forward, neck craned invading Daryl’s space and he pulls back surprised from her outburst. And then they are dancing. They clash, draw close, step back and pull together again. When Daryl is loud, Beth is louder. When Beth stands straight, a confidence stance against Daryl’s fury is new to him and he is caught with wide eyes. But it doesn’t last long and though his voice is tame, his words become more venomous. Beth takes it in and swallows those painful realizations only to keep her eyes wide open and reveal the cards up her sleeves. Daryl had weaknesses too, and if he was going to bring up hers, she show him his. She will show him that he isn’t as pokerfaced as he thought. She will show him that she had the power all along, knowing his weaknesses and never using it against him until this moment. Learning about how deeply she knew him from long before terrifies him. There had been a crack in his walls and Beth was the light shining through them. A crack that he never even knew existed until he turned around and finally looked Beth in the eye. But now Beth is here breaking those walls down, exposing him and he can’t stand the shame so he turns away. The light of her is too bright to face.
These thoughts and these scenes are familiar in Emily’s head. Everything had been executed the way she imagined it. But it changes for her the minute Norman faces away from her. Though it was exactly as they spoke and rehearsed, she knew this scene had evolved once more. Norman sways and his voice crescendos with every word. And then she is Emily, seeing the darkness in Daryl and wishing to grab onto those demons and throw them away. She reaches for him and he flinches and he breaks. The crack in his voice is so real and Daryl is here unraveling before her. This had been rehearsed. But instead it was Emily looking at tears running down Daryl’s face. This was Emily reaching for him as to hold him altogether before he is fully undone. This was Emily wrapping her arms around Daryl so tightly. She felt him move, felt him sway, but all she wanted to do was hold on tight.
Even when Jude yelled “cut”, she still held on as Norman squats down to cry in his hand. Emily falls with him as he lets out a loud sob. She knows its Norman now, when he grabs one of her hands to hold against his wet cheeks. He kisses her hand and tells her sorry over and over again. She just holds him tighter until he is ready to stand again. When they split apart, Norman smiles softly to her but his eyes are still filled with sorrow. This is the first time Emily wonders where this pain is coming from and how this side of Norman is new to her. This side of Norman who maybe is really Daryl deep down inside and the one she previously knew was maybe just a role Norman plays to fool the world.
Who was this person she held together in her arms? Who was this man, who had the depth of twenty men, but boyishly smiled at everyone? She knew Norman was complex and silly but talented and hardworking. He was charming and light but after this and the darkness she saw in his eyes, she began to wonder if she knew Norman at all.
Beth may have broken down Daryl’s walls, but Emily felt that she may just be peaking through the cracks of Norman’s for the first time.
x
Norman is a natural flirt. It’s obvious with all the touching but he is also good with his words and somehow always knows when to pull that corner of his lips up into a smirk. Norman knows his affect on the the ladies and it’d be fair to say that nearly every girl/woman he’s encountered, he has made their heart sway for him, even if its just in that moment. Emily, from the first time she met Norman, had always watched him. On set, he is more serious and really for the first time Norman was unapproachable, just as Daryl had been to the group. But when that season was over and the group somehow just a bit smaller, she had started to see Norman. His confidence was a bit unnerving to her. She scoffed to herself when he first smiled at Lauren, his finger brushing against her chin to tip her head back. He stared at her closely long enough to make Lauren look away shyly and followed up with “Jesus christ girl, you’re fucking beautiful.”
Emily could not roll her eyes any harder until Lauren pushed him back, and swooned “Oh stop it, Norman.”
She was sure her eyes were at the back of her head by then. Norman had playboy written all over him, and Emily knew she had him learned and checked off her list. She just didn’t know how good that man was at flirting. He was different with every girl but as forward as ever. With Melissa, he always grabbed her shoulders from behind and placed soft kisses on her cheeks. With Sarah, he would stand by her, an arm wrapped around her back and his hand on her waist, his lips in her hair. Laurie was just as affectionate with Norman as he was with her. Norman was always much more bold when it came to her, but it was playful in nature, whether it would be slapping her ass as she walked by or even pressing quick chaste kisses on her lips. After that first moment with Lauren, he took to kissing her hand every time he greeted her.
It took more time for Norman to work his way up to her. Emily was wary of him already and Norman might’ve been aware of it, so he took to tugging on her hair every time he saw her, sweetly singing her name, “Emmy ~”
After more and more time spent watching him, she came to understand that Norman wasn’t trying to be flirty, but this was just the way he was. He was sweet on his girls but never, ever crossed the line. And it made her gain more respect for him. He never favored anyone more than the other. He even manages to charm the younger girls as well as the older crew members. No one was left untouched and unaffected by him. She may even believe that he flirted the most with Andy. The more she spoke with him, the more her initial impression of him was changing. She believed he was still as confident as ever and if he really wanted to, he could probably have any girl down and willing after a couple of words but that was Norman. He was so sweet and rightfully so, she just couldn’t hate him for that. She eventually found herself falling into that charm. He must’ve noticed the distance she put between them before because the more she found herself moving closer, he would step forward too and was bolder in his touches with her.
By the middle of season three, she let her guard down completely. Norman was becoming an amazing friend, taking the time to get to know her. She was won over when he arrived to work, humming her song, “In”. He mentioned downloading her album the other day and playing it all night and how he couldn’t get the songs out of his head. She was so surprised and in awe she, for the first time, initiated a hug. She tiptoed to wrap her arounds around his neck and thanked him. He then in turn pressed a soft kiss where her jaw meets her neck, saying “You’re welcome, baby. You’re so good.”
Since then that has been his spot of choice. Greeting her with a kiss on her neck, usually coming from behind and surprising her with it. She just places a hand in his hair and tilts her head to open the spot for him. This was Norman, this was just what he did. And she no longer had a problem with it.
Fast forward, maybe a year later, she is now sitting on the porch of a broken down cabin in the middle of the woods with Norman. Norman managed to sneak some real moonshine on set and prompted Emily to take a drink with him while they were waiting for the night to come. This scene was another emotional scene for them. This scene was about bonding and finally becoming real with each other in a way no one has ever before. Emily had been waiting for this scene. The moments between Beth and Daryl were so memorable and her lines she knew were some of the best she ever read. She was excited to be Beth, to become this person who Daryl looked at now with an unwavering gaze. This person who would inspire him. She just couldn’t wait to spit out that line, “You’re going to miss me so bad when I’m gone, Daryl Dixon.”
As they were sitting there, facing each other, Norman looked so relaxed, and she briefly wondered if it was the moonshine’s doing. But Norman was usually pretty lax and maybe she would get to see a bit of Norman bleeding into Daryl this time. She knew the scene between them gets a little playful for the two of them and seeing Daryl in this light would be new the for audience. But she already knew Norman’s playful side and this made her feel comfortable coming into the scene.
When the film started rolling, Norman’s shoulders slumped and he leaned his head back against the wooden frame, looking at her from an angle. The playful wrinkles were wiped away with a soft, solemn gaze that flitted back and forth between his knife and her face. He couldn’t stop moving his hands, rocking the knife back and forth, stabbing it in different areas. In the darkness, she could just barely see his eyes besides a small glint of light reflecting off of them and if she watched close enough, that had a slight tremble to them. He looks away from her just as Jude yells “action” in the background. The feels the effects of the alcohol roll over her, or maybe it’s just the mood on the set, but she reciprocates Norman’s previous position, relaxing her head back against the post, looking at him from down her nose.
When she catches him steal a glance at her from behind his hair, so classically Daryl, with that glint in his eyes, she could feel her breath catch. She hears herself slur a bit in her line, “I get why my dad stopped drinking.”
“Ya feel sick?” His voice is soft again, and she vaguely thinks about their first hug and a familiar flutter in her stomach.
“Nope, I wish I could feel like this all the time. That’s bad.”
“Hmm.. you’re lucky you’re a happy drunk.”
“Yeah, I’m lucky. Some people can be real jerks when they drink.”
“Yeah I’m a dick, when I’m drunk.” The corner of his lip quips up in a bit of an open mouthed smile, but just as soon as it was there, it was gone. Replaced almost instantly with a shamed expression, as if what he said reminds him of terrifying truth in the statement.
Something erupts in her stomach and she is glad that the camera is not on her when he delivers this line. She knew this line was part of this new playful side of Daryl, yet to be seen. Norman always delivered it with a bit of a huff at the end, with a smile she is used to seeing coming from Norman. Then he’d slowly transition into the Daryl who remembers that this was his past and that it wasn’t good.
But this was new. This was moving so quickly. It took her a second to gather what was happening, but she had been whip-lashed by that soft smirk that she’d never seen Norman do before. Adding up all the playing with the knife, the up and down looks, his rapid blinking, the soft tremble in his eyes, his short breaths, and the quiet gulps; Daryl was nervous.
Then all she could hear though in her head is a line Norman said in an interview, If he does have a love interest, I wanna play it awkward.
It runs on repeat in her mind and suddenly it hits her. Norman was taking this script and molding it in his hands. He was taking this chance, right here with Beth, to give Daryl a love interest.
“Em?”
She looks up and Norman is looking at her concerned. She must’ve got caught up in all the new revelations, she had totally forgotten where she was.
“Sorry, you just look deer struck. Was I rushing? I was getting caught up in Daryl’s nerves.”
Emily almost laughed in that moment. This changes everything for her. She figured Daryl and Beth would be great partners and possibly even best friends. But this changes everything. Norman wanted Daryl to fall in love with Beth. And she fell for it. Every nervous flutter in her chest had all been adding up to this. Every time her breath caught from Daryl’s soft gaze, every time her heart raced from Daryl’s gruff voice, how her heart broke over Daryl’s heart breaking, how nervous she felt when upsetting Daryl.
Norman had her falling in love with Daryl.
And it just reminds her how all along, she has been riding on the tail end of everything Norman had been handing her through Daryl. Norman was playing a risky game, forcing his hand like this, assumingly believing he’d somehow convince the world that this was likely. That Beth and Daryl could really be Beth and Daryl. But it did not seem so far off now, seeing as he managed to convince her this could be real.
Emily looks to Norman who is confused probably from watching the flurry of emotions cross her face. She shakes her head to him smiling.
“No, it was perfect.”
Later, when they get to the dialogue just before she suggests burning down the house, she can’t help but to want to mess with him. Especially after the way Norman suggestively tells her they should go inside, him side glancing at her with a sultry promise.
She bites down on her bottom lip, giving him a look over before tilting her head and one of her soft smiles. “Okay.”
The look on Norman’s face is priceless but Norman has always been fast on his feet, especially when it came to flirting. His eyebrows raise at her questioningly and she nods. Seconds later, she’s being scooped up into his arms and he’s carrying her over the threshold of the cabin. She can’t hold in her laughter any longer and Norman grumbles as he carries her, “‘Okay?’ I’ll show you ‘okay’, you little vixen.”
She laughs even louder when Norman buries his face in neck and blows raspberries loudly. The whole crew joining her in laughter.
A couple days later, when they are filming at the funeral home. A scene had been added in last second, where Daryl carries Beth into the kitchen and she just knows deep down that it was all Norman’s doing. Everything from the beginning and from now on is Norman’s doing. Every scene and moment leading up this and to her falling for Daryl.
So she will do everything she can to make him fall in love with Beth too.
xxx
Thank you guys for reading!