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English
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Published:
2021-05-10
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2,256
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1/1
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Oh For Frog's Sake

Summary:

Kurt never imagined having a big family would come with so many issues to address...especially the bad language.

Notes:

Former Bad boy Blaine Anderson! Having a family in the future. What could possibly go wrong?

Work Text:

"God dammit!"

Kurt rolled his eyes at the language this house had taken on. Not only did Blaine swear a lot, now the kids were. Ethan was 19, Chloe and Jessica were 17, and Jasper was 15, and no matter how much Kurt had explained about proper language around the home, they still let the words come out.

He was glad that Megan and Joshua, 11 year old twins, were at school most of the day, and Harrison, who was 3, was having a nap on the couch.

Kurt too focused on feeding the recent addition to their home, to really admonish Ethan for his language right now. Rosy was 7 months old, and very bubbly and happy. She was gurgling away as Kurt was feeding her lunch, her rounded chubby baby face pulled into a smile every time he put the spoon back in her bowl.

"Kurt, have you seen my black Fendis?" Ethan asked as he came barreling into the kitchen, like thunder, face completely red and a scowl set on his face, "they're not in my room."

"I haven't," Kurt responded calmly, smiling down at Rosy, who was giggling at him through mouthfuls of food, "maybe you left them at Daniel's the other night?"

"I didn't, I had them here." He said angrily, "someone has been in my room."

"It wasn't me."

"I'm gonna kill Jasper." Ethan grumbled as he ran back up the stairs to find other sneakers to wear, and Kurt rolled his eyes again.

Kurt and Blaine had been together for 15 years, married for 12 and decided to open their home to underprivileged and desperate children, who had no-one else. They decided to become foster parents, but most of their kids were adopted by them anyway now. Except Harrison and now Rosy.

They had approached the idea of kids when they had gotten married, but they didn't want to have any of their own. They decided the best way would be to adopt kids who didn't have anyone else. Give them a home, and a nurturing environment, help them to learn and grow.

They wanted to share their love with all kids who needed them, and so far they had been doing a great job.

Except as they grew older, the swear words were getting ridiculous and Kurt was starting to get irritated by it.

Blaine was the instigator, he knew. They had about 5 different swear jars, that everyone had to use, and Blaine had placed the most money into them the last few years. They had been arguing and fighting constantly about the language around the house. Blaine didn't seem to see the problem with the odd swear, but Harrison and said 'shit' today and that in Kurt's book was unacceptable.

Kurt had met Blaine in high school, and had instantly fallen for the bad boy image he represented. He lost his virginity to him in a week, and Blaine became his first love. Even though there had been a lot of arguments and heartache to get Blaine to admit that he felt the same.

After about 6 months, Blaine decided that they were boyfriends, and took Kurt out on their first date. It was amazing after that, but Blaine had had to raise himself as a boy and as a teenager, the adults in his life didn't care much for him, and the bad attitude was still sometimes present, even now as a grown man with children.

Kurt loved him he did, he was an amazing husband, and father, and he always planned to do right by his family. But his mouth was sometimes disgusting. But with the stress of Blaine's job this year, that attitude had been steadily climbing to the surface again.

Ethan, Chloe and Jessica had come to their home about 7 years ago, they were siblings who had no family to take them in after their parents died in a house fire. it was tragic, and Blaine and Kurt spent many nights dealing with tantrums and teenage rebellion and angst. After a year or so, they seemed to settle and calm down. So Blaine and Kurt decided to adopt all 3 of them.

Then Jasper had come along. He was abused as a toddler by his mother, beaten everyday. He was undernourished and very listless and quiet. it had taken years to get him up to what he was now. He had come to them at 9 years old, but he looked about 5.

He was a happier teen now, and Kurt and Blaine had adopted him too, once the courts had ruled in their favour.

The Judge that proceeded the case was a good friend of Kurt's father, so she knew that Jasper would be taken care of.

Megan and Joshua had appeared last year. 10 year old twins who's mother was taken to rehab for drug overdose and alcohol poisoning, Kurt and Blaine had an open adoption with them after meeting their mother, who for all the trouble she had with herself was a good person.

They still had contact with her about once a month, which was no trouble for Kurt and Blaine, and the twins seemed better because of it.

Harrison and Rosy had come to them this year, only about 3 months apart. Harrison was in the system since he was a year old, but nobody knows why. Nobody ever found his family, he was dropped off outside a police station in a car seat and then he was taken into care.

Rosy had a teenage mother who couldn't take care of her, so she was put into the system too.

It was a very noisy and full house right now, which is why Kurt was glad that he had taken some time off from work, to deal with everything at home while Blaine was at work.

The front door opened with a slight bang, and the twins came rushing in, flinging their school bags in the hallway and racing each other up the stairs. The noise jolted Harrison from the couch and he started whining as he got up.

Blaine came through the door as Kurt was about to get up and deal with Harrison, and gave his husband a smile as he got him instead.

"Hey buddy," Blaine said as he bent to pick Harrison up from the couch, who held his arms up to him immediately, "did the twins wake you up with the noise, I'm sorry."

Blaine carried Harrison into the kitchen with him, the little boy's dark haired head resting against his shoulder as he bent to kiss Kurt in greeting.

Kurt accepted the kiss and lingered for a second, throwing Blaine a smile.

"Hey honey, how was work?"

"Hard, as usual." Blaine replied as he placed Harrison in a chair by Kurt and then turned to make himself a coffee, "how has your day been?"

"Interesting," Kurt responded with a smirk, "I'm glad Rosy can't speak yet, coz I already have to put up with 8 potty mouths in this house."

"What?" Blaine asked as his slight smile faded and Kurt pointedly looked at Harrison and then back at Blaine.

"Harrison had a very colourful word choice earlier."

Blaine looked away guiltily for a second before trying to respond. he stared back into Kurt's eyes with regret and his shoulders slumped.

"I'm sorry." He said and Kurt smiled at him softly.

"I know."

As Blaine was about to respond again they were interrupted by a voice screaming at the top of their lungs.

"Jasper you better get your ass home, I swear if you get any dirt on my Fendi sneakers I will hunt you down and fucking kill you!"

Kurt and Blaine looked at each other with shocked faces, Kurt's mouth falling open a little before Blaine turned to walk towards the stairs.

"Ethan!" Blaine called up the stairs, in a slightly angry voice, which silenced the whole house, "tell your brother to come home now! Family meeting downstairs in 15 minutes!"

Kurt always got a little thrill at Blaine's authoritive voice, and he tried to repress his instant arousal as he came back into the kitchen. Blaine shot a look at him that let Kurt know that he knew the affect it had on him, his mouth forming a smirk as he mouthed 'later' to his husband.

Kurt bit his lip and turned to finish feeding the baby,

When they were teenagers themselves, it had been Kurt's father Burt's idea to implement family meetings. After Finn and Kurt were always arguing and Blaine and Kurt always getting in trouble for being alone in the house, he had put in place weekly meetings for them to discuss issues that they were uncomfortable with.

Kurt and Blaine had taken that over when they had a family, the kids knew it was a serious topic when a family meeting was called. Especially when it was Blaine calling it. Blaine was the one that dished out punishments, and Kurt was the one they ran to with problems.

It just happened, Blaine was a lot tougher on the teenagers than Kurt was.

Even though Kurt had grounded the girls before for attending a party at a college guys house without permission.

10 minutes later, when Kurt was done cleaning up Rosy's face and setting her in her playpen, Jasper came through the front door with a worried look on his face and then the rest of the teenagers slunk down from upstairs.

Kurt gestured for everyone to sit in the living room. The twins were the last to appear, and once everyone was seated, Kurt picked up Harrison and too a seat himself, placing the little boy on his lap with a car to play with until Blaine walked in.

"Right, I called this meeting because the language in this house has reached a new level of 'not okay'." Blaine started and Jessica snorted.

"You're such a hypocrite, you swear all the time."

"Quiet," Blaine growled at his daughter and she shut her mouth with a snap and a roll of her eyes as Blaine carried on, "as I was saying...the language has reached an all time unacceptable level, and we all need to stop."

"Why now?" Jasper asked a little curious and Kurt interrupted as Blaine was ready to snap at him.

"Harrison said a bad word today." He told them all and their eyes flicked over to the little boy on Kurt's lap, and then they all looked at each other guiltily, "I know the jars are there for a reason, but its not meant to be a thing ok? You're not supposed to keep swearing and then roll your eyes as you put a dollar in the jar."

"And from now on, every time I hear a bad word from anyone, I'll be docking allowance and then once the allowance is gone, I'll be taking items and phones, and games, away from all of you."

"And when they're gone too, we'll be grounding you."

Blaine looked down at Kurt with a small appraising smile and then looked around at the kids.

"What are we supposed to do when the social workers come around again to check on Harrison and Rosy and one of them ends up telling her to go f-"

"Blaine." Kurt stopped him, and Blaine turned to him with sheepish look, before clearing his throat and letting Kurt carry on.

"I think we should make up words to use, when we want to swear." Kurt suggested at them all and everyone thought about it for a while until jasper smiled.

"How about 'for Frog's sake'?" He said and Blaine rolled his eyes with a smile as the kids then began making up silly phrases of swear words, and making animals words or sounds instead.

Kurt and Blaine looked at each other with amusement as Harrison started laughing at the barking noises that Jasper was making.

"Ok, family meeting adjourned," Blaine said with a clap of his hands, "curb it, please."

He gave them all a pointed look, and then they all dispersed a little. Blaine grabbed a hold of Ethan's wrist and held him back while the others disappeared.

"I never want you to threaten anyone ever again, ok?" He said quietly but the implication underneath shook Ethan a little and he nodded shakily as Blaine let him go, "and you!"

Jasper paused and turned on the step as Blaine pointed to him.

"Don't steal your brother's stuff."

Jasper nodded as he disappeared, toeing off the sneakers and handing them back to Ethan as they went.

Kurt placed Harrison down on the floor so that he could roll the car around the mat, like a race track, before standing and walking up behind Blaine. He threaded his arms around his husband's waist from behind and leaned his chin over one shoulder.

"Forcefully done Mr A." He said quietly as he kissed Blaine's neck, and felt his husband chuckle as he turned his arms.

"I'll forcefully do you later, Mr H." He responded in a low tone, his eyes dilated slightly and Kurt gulped a little.

Blaine pushed his lips over Kurt's, swallowing the little gasp that left the pale lips, and running his tongue teasingly over the seam of them before pulling away. Kurt was a little breathless and thoroughly turned on now.

"I can't wait." Kurt said a little breathy and Blaine smiled with a raised eyebrow before he disappeared back into the kitchen to start dinner.