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I Haven't a Clue What's Going on Here, but I'll Act Like I Do!

Summary:

It's Isagi's first time over at the Itoshi house, of course something has to go wrong. (But if this was wrong, then fuck being right.)

Notes:

this is so embarrassing T—T

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

What else was Isagi expecting when having dinner at the Itoshi household? The room was dead quiet and it was just him, Rin, and Sae at the table.

Then a small tap of Sae's fork on Rin's plate broke the silence, and somehow that was enough to start a completely wordless conversation between the two brothers, leaving Isagi out of the loop.

It started with Sae cocking his head in Isagi's general direction and pointing at Rin, who then did a double take, as if he'd taken offense to such a vague gesture, and shook his head like he was saying 'no'. Isagi then noticed Sae's eyes go wide in surprise (He didn't even know anything could faze such a jaded person.) before looking directly into Isagi's eyes. On instinct, he looked away, but he could still feel Sae's prying eyes, and he thought his and Rin's little exchange probably wasn't anything he wanted to know anymore.

"So, Isagi, how old are you?" Sae asked, breaking the tension again, (Or was he worsening it? Isagi really couldn't tell anymore.) but before he could even answer, a kick from under the table rattled the cutlery and startled him as well.

"Don't!" Rin whisper-hissed, glaring so hard that even Isagi, who wasn't on the receiving end, could feel the pressure of.

Although Sae didn't find him as scary as Isagi did, it actually seemed like he found Rin's attempt to be funny. "What? I'm just making small talk with your friend since you apparently don't want to." He turned his attention back to Isagi and asked, "You like talking?" to which Isagi nodded. "Me too, we've got so much in common, don't you think? Anyways, you've gotta be like 17 or 18, right?"

"Ye-yeah, I'm 17 right now, but I'll be 18 in April." Should he really be entertaining Sae? Not only was he Rin's brother, but also a skilled football player that he really admired. Isagi felt extremely out of place talking to him so casually.

"Oh, April? When in?" And again, Rin glared at him, still obviously pissed off, (For some reason?) but Sae couldn't care less and grinned mockingly at him. They kept that up for a few seconds before eventually Rin scoffed and went back to picking at his food.

What the hell was Isagi caught in the middle of?

"Uh, April first, like—" He tried answering, before getting cut off with exactly what he'd expected.

"Like April Fools' day? Really?" Sae tried keeping his cool before eventually breaking out into quiet laughter that made Isagi blush more than be self-conscious. (But since when could he laugh?!) "That's so cute, and you're an Aries? I'm a Libra, we're really c—"

"No way you're bringing your fake astrology stuff into this, that's way too far!" Rin exclaimed, looking properly disgusted with him. Was astrology really worth getting that worked up over?

"This is fun, so who even cares?" It really seemed like Sae didn't have a care in the world, he was so nonchalant about... whatever it was that was going on.

Rin stood up with so much force that his chair got pushed back, pressing his hands down on the table. "I care? This is so weird and you're probably making him uncomfortable!" At least his feelings were being taken into consideration, even if only as rebuttal.

"Am I? Don't lie." Sae asked, making eye contact with Isagi again. It took nearly all his willpower to not look away, he was so damn intimidating even when he wasn't trying to be.

"No, honestly, it's fine, I'm just kinda lost? What's happening?" Immediately after he asked that, he regretted it, thinking that the excited look in Sae's eyes and the panicked one in Rin's was telling enough of the mistake he'd just made.

"Rin!"—

"Sae!"—

They said in sync, one pleading and one warning.

"Come on, he's pretty and stupid, how can I not be into him?"

And it finally hit Isagi, that, holy shit, Itoshi Sae had been flirting with him. His face then started to heat up again, and he tried covering it with his hands, although that probably made him more obvious than not.

For the longest time, he didn't even know Sae had feelings outside of football, he was always so intense on the field and didn't seem to care about anything else, especially not something trivial like dating. Then he picked Isagi out of all people? Why? And what the hell did 'pretty and stupid' mean? Isagi didn't even know if he should take offense to that, on one hand he had pride but on the other, he was considered pretty.

"Awh, he broke." Sae joked disappointedly, ruffling Isagi's hair, like he hadn't already killed him once.

"Obviously. You can't ever leave my friends alone?" Rin complained, sitting back down and clearly annoyed. (This wasn't a one time thing?!)

"It's my job to raise hell for you, so no. But he's actually cool, and our signs are compatible—"

"That shit doesn't exist, would you shut up about it already?"

And with that, Sae got up and took his now empty plate to the kitchen. "You're only saying that because of your Scorpio moon placement, y'know!"

"Can you just leave? Don't you have Spain to be in, anyway?" Rin's little remark earned him a smack upside the head, deservingly. There was a sticky note and a pen in Sae's hands, and he started writing something Isagi couldn't see.

"I leave in a few months, you can't already want me gone. Here," He said, talking to Isagi again and pressing the sticky note into the table. "My number."

Somehow, Isagi got more flustered, blushing even harder and barely able to get out a simple "Thanks". How was he living in real life?

Isagi wasn't not into Sae, he was definitely fine and his football skills could pull anybody, but he'd never thought for a second that he'd seriously have a chance with him. More like a 'celebrity crush' type-thing, except the 'celebrity' in question happened to be his best friend's older brother.

"You're not actually considering going out with him, right?" Rin asked, like he was confident Isagi would say no. When he didn't answer right away, the deep sigh that Rin let out could only be described as exhausted. "Seriously?"

"He called me pretty, c'mon..." Isagi mumbled shyly. After all, he'd always been a sucker for compliments and praise.

"You're never coming back here."

"What—! Yes I am, don't be a dick!"

Notes:

it's been *counts fingers* like 6 or 7 months since i posted a fic and i come back with a short crackfic that was written in a day abt a rarepair that's completely out of character and also have never interacted in canon MY BAD Y'ALL! ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

everything astrology related is accurate btw i actually looked up their charts for this shit

 

kudos and comments r always appreciated okay Bye!!