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“Peter we have a crisis.”
“Of what variety?” Peter asked casually, attention still on the DS in his hands where he and MJ were playing Mario Kart. Ned had come in with a frantic look on his face.
He, MJ and Ned were doing this more, getting back into the swing of things. They played DS Mario Kart, hung out and read books in silence and came up with little ideas, played cool math games and watched movie marathons of Star Wars and other action/sci-fi films and eating shitty junk food. They could sit and hang out and rant and rave about everything from politics to shitty sci-fi.
A lot of things were the same in that sense, but a lot of things were also different. No more school projects instead cases and new Stark tech inventions taking their place, and their setting changed too. Gone were the cramped living rooms with too many mismatched quilts and in its place a cozy penthouse view with a huge TV for them to watch their films and play their games. Sure, they went over to Ned and MJ’s house - but more often than not they stayed with Peter -mainly due to Spiderman related issues coming up.
Still the vibe of what they had throughout childhood stayed the same - even when Shuri and Harley joined (not that they were exclusive, it’s just no one wanted to ever hang out with them before - well no one their age Wade only half counted cause he is a man child. They never really had the opportunity to consider having other people integrated into their little hang sessions, so they never thought about it - always content with it just being them). The comfort and relaxation of being with his two most trusted friends by his side making him softer - and he found himself not minding as much as he thought he would.
“Of the school variety.” Ned replied in a mix of anxiety and frustration, looking like he wanted to tear his hair out and cry at the same time, “It’s prom night and I gotta pick up Betty.” he bit his lip in a nervous habit, ringing his hands out.
“Ah so that’s why Harley is primping.” Peter mused as he was wondering why his towermate denied him and MJ’s invitation to play Mario Kart. Turns out it was date night tonight, he wondered who Harley was taking.
“Ha, you losers are going to that thing?” MJ asked and Ned rolled his eyes. Peter held back a snort in favor of a small secretive smile. Of course MJ wouldn’t go, that didn’t surprise him in the least.
“Yes, we’re seniors. We only have one more of these left, c’mon MJ.” Ned half pleaded half scolded, looking pointedly toward MJ who was still dressed in her hoodie and ripped jeans and had an uncaring expression on her face as her eyes flicked up to meet his for the barest of seconds to convey how utterly she did not care . Peter wanted to laugh - nothing has changed.
“Dude, you have a date, you look great, I don’t see the problem.” Peter said, ignoring MJ and her apparent strike not to go to the prom. That was an issue to deal with after Ned had already left - once MJ made up her mind she tended to stick with her plan - instead focusing on his half panicked friend, who was about 50 steps away from a nervous breakdown - giving him wiggle room without being an immediate problem.
“Nerves dude!” Ned groaned and flopped back into the couch, splaying his arms out smacking Peter’s stomach lightly “I mean I know you don’t have them, because you're a superhero and shit but I do . What if she cancels last minute? What if she leaves during the dance to go with some other guy. What if I sweat through my shirt.” he groaned again and Peter suppressed a chuckle in favor of a good natured eye roll.
“Okay, A I literally have my own patented spider anxiety.” Peter pointed one finger up. “And B,” he held up the second finger “She won’t . Betty ain’t that petty or that mean. She wouldn’t cancel on you last minute.” Peter was sort of talking out of his ass, he’s met Betty all of like 5 times and most of it was just in passing, but she didn’t seem like the type to be shallow or flake. She seemed more like the type to want to dive into a new experience head on and with her whole heart (or maybe he was just thinking of Ms.Page because Betty Brant gave him reporter vibes, wasn’t she the school new caster? Did she still do that?)
“I dunno it’s happened before.” MJ said offhandedly, which made Peter’s head snap towards her in shock.
“What?!” Peter yelped and looked quickly back at Ned for confirmation which he meekly nodded and ducked his head a little in shame. Which made a flare of protectiveness spark inside him. “I’m so sorry dude. She didn’t deserve you.” he tried to maintain his cool. Did Stark know about this? Did Pepper know about this? Is this chick destroyed? Peter would gladly destroy them.
“You don’t even know her.” Ned said exasperatedly, giving Peter a
don’t you dare
look, to which Peter put on his best innocent face. It was a lie, destroyed or not, Peter would knock down whatever this she devil managed to build. There was no way Pepper hadn’t destroyed this chick’s future. There was no way
MJ
hadn’t destroyed her social standings. But Peter was fucking Spiderman, he could do the rest.
“Know she’s stupid enough to let a catch like you go.” Peter mumbled, crossing his arms. He had the Black Widow and Winter Soldier’s blood in his veins, he was going to get revenge - one way or another. It was Ned’s fault for forgetting just how soul crushing Peter could be.
Distract him with sweet nothings. He shared a look with MJ and internally smirked. MJ gets it.
“Thanks Peter.” Ned smiled up at him smally “MJ just said shit happens and it was overrated to date anyway.” And yeah that sounded like MJ, but Peter couldn’t help but roll his eyes. Peter was the empathy in the group, that was for sure. It’s at times like this he wonders how their relationship stayed so strong without him.
Because all they had was each other.
The slimy voice in the back of his head whispered
You’d have known about this sooner if you had just been there, you could’ve done something sooner. But you just left them, you selfish bastard and look at them - they are fine on their own.
Peter shut the voice down to bring himself to the present. “Sorry I wasn’t there.” Peter said apologetically. Ned waved him off. Like it wasn’t a big deal that Ned didn’t have his best friend to be there through this emotional hardship - a more normal one but that didn’t diminish it’s damage.
“You were saving the city dude.” he said like that was an excuse, which it really was not . He was just fucking around trying to get his life together somewhat.
“Still.” Peter said instead, MJ was giving him that look again - the look when she was looking right through him. He ignored it.
There was a moment's pause - which was almost awkward - before the door opened and presented Harley in a three piece, straightening out his bow tie.
“Ready to go dude.” Harley said as Ned stood up and nodded.
“Yep.” he said too quickly and Harley laughed and slapped him on the back good naturedly making Ned jump. Peter smiled a little at his friend's nervousness . Betty better not screw this up .
“Don’t worry, if you sweat thats what the blazer is for.” Peter called, instead of inciting his threat - it would be no good to Ned anyway. MJ hummed.
“Unless he sweats through the blazer.”
“ MJ!”
OoOoO
“So…”
“Spit it out Parker, you’ve been fidgeting for the last ten minutes.” MJ said irritably, Peter didn’t even have the decency to look ashamed. With the new information about Ned’s attempted dating life and MJ here and knowing about him stewing in his self deprecating thoughts - she was using his mental health deficiency to get ahead in Mario Kart, MJ was not below that - he was anxious to get some sort of ball rolling.
“ you aren’t going.” Peter stated offhandedly. Lamely, cause again MJ could see through that, she could always see through him. And she wouldn’t judge him or treat him differently for it, just let it come up and out in his own time - which is what he really liked about spending time with her. She made it on his terms, and would take it and tell him what he needed to hear - no matter how harsh (Ned was a little softer, which is why it was good to have Peter as an emotional buffer to MJ’s brash way of addressing problems. But for Peter, he just liked hearing it straight).
“A constructed social event where the guy asks a girl and fawns over her for the whole night, while she giggles and looks pretty?” MJ raised a brow. RIght, not an MJ thing. Definitely not an MJ thing.
“Fair enough.” Peter shrugged, bouncing his leg nervously “I’ve never been to one either so don’t really have any room to judge.” he said distractedly, almost missing MJ’s snort.
“Yeah, cuz you were fucking around as a viglante and bright red spandex.” she pointed out and he looked at her, who was waiting for him to meet her gaze.
“Touche”
There was a moments pause.
“If someone asked you, would you go?” Peter finally asked. Not that he was asking her - but she knew he wasn’t asking her.
“Depends on how annoying they are.” MJ sighed. Right, because there was no way in hell MJ would be able to last five minutes without some one who could stimulate her intellectually; who gave her a challenge and wasn’t afraid to speak their mind without being a complete asshole. It was hard to come by, and apparently he and Ned met that criteria. Shuri obviously did, he was still on the fence about Harley - not for lack of stimulation, just that MJ doesn’t open up easily, Shuri, as always, seems to be an exception to that rule.
“Someone moderately tolerable or higher.” Peter hummed and MJ made an affirmative noise.
“There is no one higher at our school, they barely meet that requirement.” she said in a disappointed and frustrated mix of a sigh. Peter could understand that, he hasn’t been mentally challenged that entire year he was gone, and while Ned was smart - MJ liked debating books and she often did that with Peter. Looks like they both lost a little stimulation while he was gone.
“Does it have to be from school?” Peter asked curiously, he’d never been to prom before so he didn’t know the regulations and criteria - hell he didn’t even think he’d have the option to go.
“Technically. No.” MJ sighed “But still no one meets that standard.” Not that she knew anyway, MJ wasn’t a very outgoing person. She only met people through work, school or protests and got along with about 1.2% of said people - excluding bosses and adult figures, of course.
“It’s a hypothetical.”Peter rolled his eyes, and smiled despite himself. MJ finally put down her game.
“It wouldn’t matter, it’s too late now.” MJ said nonchalantly.
“In that case,”and she narrowed her eyes suspiciously - she knows this tone, and Peter is not ashamed to use it. Peter grinned wolfishly. “Wanna crash it.” There was no hesitation.
“Hell yes.”
OoOoO
“You sure you’re cool with this.”
Peter held a basket full of the items from Party City. Which was always a good place to go, they used Wade’s membership (Team Red had made a lot of pranks over the past couple of years and to say they don’t do things by halves is an understatement. When they prank, they prank hard and, unfortunately, out of pocket. It didn’t help that they were mostly broke - hah like they’d let money stop them - so any discount is fucking worth it ). They weren’t gonna do this by halves either.
“I’m always down to mess with Mortata.” MJ shrugged. Of course she’d say that, nevermind that his ex-principal's grandfather was in a platoon lead by one of the greatest and revolutionary women in history.
“Alrighty I think we are ready to go.” Peter grinned, and they used cash, because they ain’t no rookies and would leave a digital trail. One of Wade’s prank rules: never leave a trail. That’s how Calossis got him that one time.
They checked out and walked the 4 blocks to school. No this plan was not born out of petty avenging - although he is an Avenger now...kinda...not really. Peter missed hanging out with MJ, missed her snark and her witty comebacks. Missed goofing off with her and messing with people for political - and personal - justice. This reminded him of simpler times when they’d graffiti political controversial things on the sides of court buildings and in time square. Or got into trouble after dark at bot fights and in the junk yard.
When they got there, they put on their plastic avengers masks - Peter being Ironman and MJ as the Hulk - and put up their hoodie as they ducked in the bushes, taking stock of their pseudo weapons.
“There.” MJ pointed at a blonde girl who was strutting out of a corvette. “That’s the girl who ditched Ned last dance.” she pointed her out. And of course she’d known what Peter’s secret agenda. Not that she didn’t approve, apparently.
“Okay Britney, revenge time.” Peter muttered to himself, giving his egg launcher - Harley’s mark up of a potato launcher which he borrowed without permission, but it was for a good cause.
“Actually her name is-”
“I’m calling her britney cause she looks like a britney.” Peter cut her off and she scoffed.
“Okay, but counterpoint: Britney Spears and Britney from Alvin and the chipmunks.” And god dammit she had a point. Britney from the chipettes was a literal icon, sass queen. Most tolerable chipette by far and respect to her.
“Shit,” Peter said under the breath. No way he was gonna name her Regina after that iconic bad bitch, he will forever admire her. And no way would he dane to learn the actual sea witch's name, that would humanize her “She was a queen.” he muttered, trying to think of a name.
“The human or the chipmunk?” MJ asked, shaking her cans of spray paint.
“Her name is now Shelia, for that bitch who killed Jason Todd.” Peter said with finality, ignoring MJ’s question.
“That is literally so valid but Peter,” MJ said solemnly and Peter turned to her serious face. “The human or the chipmunk.” she enunciated.
Peter grinned.
OoOoO
“You two are unbelievable .”
Ned stormed into the living room, where Peter and MJ launched - evidence of their nighttime activities laying shamelessly around them , because damn if they would litter, besides prints - and Harley followed not that far behind, looking calm and amused with a wicked smirk on his face. He approved, obviously.
This might have not been a problem if they just stopped at Shelia…
Oh well, no regrets.
“I don’t know what you are talking about. We were here the entire night.” Peter said not looking up from his game, seeing Ned exaggeratedly gesturing around the room to the silly string cans and plastic masks in clear disbelief that they were even denying.
“You, Peter Parker, are a lying liar who lies.” Ned accused, which okay ouch . Peter defends Ned’s honor, and this is the thanks they get? Ungrateful. At least Betty didn’t seem like a bad person, given that its not something Ned was ranting about.
“Well he does have a secret identity to keep, but that’s because he’s a superhero.” MJ shrugged. Point to MJ, the only ally in this cruel, cruel world.
“You two totally crashed our prom!” Ned nearly screamed, but there was a hint of laughter in his tone. So Peter knew he was okay, and went back to his eyes on Animal Crossing“You totally glitter bombed Allison Walker!” So that was that bitches name.
“Betty laughed so hard punch came out of her nose when she walked in.” Harley said wistfully, ah so the date went well. Good on Betty, girl has taste.
“No she was already wearing clown makeup, we silly stringed her.” Peter pointed out “Which why would you pair that shade of purple eyeshadow with a pink dress, I mean did she want to look like a stereotypical hooker - which, okay offensive.” he grumbled and MJ hummed in agreement (he will not apologize for knowing about cosmetics, okay? It’s come in handy and not that he doesn’t respect a hooker - you gotta do what you gotta do, Peter gets that more than anyone here - but just flaunting around like that was in bad taste).
“That was mainly due to her lack of following dress code, her tits were hanging out. Who does she think she is Elizabeth Olsen?” MJ hummed.
“Only Elizabeth Olsen actually looks good in whatever she wears. She’s a literal icon-” peter started and MJ nodded in affirmative before Ned cut off her reply.
“So you do admit that you crashed the prom!” Ned said in an aha voice. Which was honestly adorable , he was just too easy to mess with - mind you, only they could mess with him, anyone else would and will get an hot egg paint ball to the face, and those do not wash out.
“That was so awesome.” Harley laughed. “We brought you back cake.” Harley holds up a box and Peter lights up as he puts down he game in anticipation for their reward after some hard work.
“Chocolate?” MJ asked and Ned threw up his hands as if done with all of them. Bu their job here was done and he was not going to wish this night had gone any differently.
“ One night of normalcy, that’s all I ask.” Ned moaned. Peter grinned.
“Then why do hang out with literal superheroes.” Peter called to him.
“I hate you.” he said getting in the elevator.
“You’re the best~” Peter sang as Ned disappeared and Tony came striding out with a tension line on his forehead. Oh, here they go.
“Can you two explain to me…” Tony started looking at MJ and Peter and then at the offending objects of their nightly events “Why I just got a call from the school that students were covered in eggs, toilet paper, shaving cream, paint balloons and silly string upon entering the school for their dance.” MJ didn’t stop the proud smirk coming to her face. Pepper had received that call, and if she as asking Tony to deal with it, then that means she approved 130%. That just made Peter feel more validated.
“The shaving cream was strawberry scented.” Peter said not looking up from his game and Tony sighed.
“At least tell me they were assholes.” He knew they were assholes, or else Pepper would be grinding them to dust as soon as they walked in the door.
MJ mumbled in duh its obvious affirmation. She wasn’t lying, they only targeted the assholes that harassed Ned, embarrassed Ned, embarrassed/harassed Peter when he went there - if they haven’t reformed which was all according to MJ’s intel. Or just general assholes.
“We got the girl that ditched Ned.” Peter said instead, looking Tony directly in the eye and seeing nothing but steely resolve.
“Good.”