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The nightmares burdened Kirito so often that his partner wasn’t sure what to think. When he’d met the strange boy without a memory to his name, he’d wondered what kind of life he’d lived. He must have been from another part of the Human Empire; his skin was a different color and his hair was as black as coal. But what was most curious about him wasn’t that he looked drastically different from the people of Norlangarth, nor was it that he had no clue as to how he’d gotten there. It was these nightmares.
They happened every night, it seemed. Eugeo would wake up to find Kirito shaking and crying in his sleep. He didn’t know what the right thing to do would be in these situations. He barely knew him, but his heart ached every time he saw his partner going through this agony. Once, he’d considered asking Kirito about the nightmares. He’d quickly silenced himself, realizing that they might bring up horrid memories suppressed in his mind. If Kirito’s life had been a living hell prior to this, why should he bring that back to his memory? It almost would be better for him to live in a perfect blissful ignorance than to recall things that made his body shudder as if he were trapped in the Northern Caves.
Still, Eugeo found himself feeling rather guilty about this knowledge. If Kirito awoke each morning, presuming Eugeo knew nothing of his terrified state, wasn’t he being dishonest? He wanted to change this aspect of their relationship, but he didn’t know best how to approach the subject. Kirito needed support, but he clearly wasn’t asking for it. As they traveled towards Centoria, he agonized over how to best reach out and be there for his partner.
The moment came most unexpectedly.
They had chosen a cave to sleep in for the night. They were far too close to Centoria to turn back and look for lodging in the last town, but they were also just far enough away that there were no inns within eyesight that they could stop at before dark. Kirito went out and gathered up some sticks and dry brush to start a fire. Eugeo started to set up their cooking ware, preparing to make another batch of their less-than-flavorful soup. So long as he didn’t have to eat Kirito’s version, he felt he could survive the night.
Kirito reentered the cave and dropped the sticks and brush into a heap on the floor. Eugeo stepped over and helped him to start a fire. Kirito dashed back out for more sticks and brush to use to keep the fire going until sleep found them. When he’d returned, Eugeo had started on the soup. He sat down after stacking the sticks and brush in a pile to the side, and he let out a sigh of relief.
“I’ll be glad when we reach the Swordcraft Academy and have actual beds,” he said, grinning like a child who’d been offered a sweet.
Eugeo shook his head, unable to smile as well.
“That will be nice,” he said. “As will eating something better than this.”
Kirito chuckled, but he nodded in clear agreement. They were both tired of the same old soup concoction. Even if the food at the academy wasn’t particularly good, it would be better than this. Eugeo poured out two bowls of the soup and handed one to Kirito. His partner at least seemed grateful enough to have food that he’d eat it. They ate their meal in silence, both taking a double portion to fill up their bellies.
“I think I heard thunder,” Kirito said. “We may be walking through mud in the morning.”
Eugeo hummed, unsure of what to say in response. He started to clean up the space and pack it away. There wouldn’t be a desire to pack up in the morning, so if he could limit the clutter now, it was best. He stepped out of the cave to wash up the pot, spoon, and bowls, and when he returned, Kirito was already lying on his back, head resting on his bag. He smiled, shook his head, and stored the cooking ware in its proper place before lying down beside him.
“Sleep well, Kirito,” he whispered.
He set up his own makeshift pillow and curled up on his side. The serene crackling of the fire lulled him to sleep, letting him know that he was safe for now. As his eyes fell closed from heavy lids, he told himself that tomorrow’s journey was the last leg of the trip; after this, he’d be rewarded with a warm bed, decent food, and the chance to grow stronger and be reunited with Alice. Smiling to himself, he fell asleep, comforted by the thoughts of things yet to come.
His sleep didn’t last. His eyes snapped open with a crash of thunder outside. He sat up and groaned. The night outside was pitch black, save for when a streak of light filled the space with white brightness that stung his tired eyes. He wondered how Kirito could sleep through such a loud mess. He turned his eyes to his partner and saw that he’d changed sleeping positions. He was now tightly curled up, shaking, and sounded as if he were crying in his sleep. Eugeo bit his lip and reached over to place his hand on Kirito’s back. Before his palm touched Kirito, the boy spoke in his sleep.
“...m sorry…”
Eugeo’s eyes widened. He sat there, frozen still, as he tried to listen to Kirito’s unconscious words.
“...Sachi...m...sorry...sorry...m…”
It wasn’t coherent enough. Eugeo finally lowered his hand and spread his fingers out across Kirito’s back. The boy stopped shuddering and suddenly became quite still. Eugeo watched as a tear rolled down Kirito’s cheek. His heart tightened in his chest. Whoever Sachi was, Kirito felt apologetic to them. It was such a strong feeling that he wailed about it in his sleep every night. Eugeo couldn’t understand his partner’s pain, but he could be there to comfort him when the pain came to him.
“Rest easy, Kirito,” Eugeo said. “I’m right here.”
Laying back down, Eugeo wrapped his arms around Kirito and pulled him to his chest. What Kirito needed was security. Eugeo could offer him that. Until the morning came, he would embrace him and make sure that Kirito knew he was in safe hands. Kirito’s breathing steadied and he started to lightly doze, saying nothing more. Eugeo fought the urge to fall asleep for some time, worried that Kirito might relapse, but eventually, he, too, fell into a deep sleep, his head resting against the back of Kirito’s neck.
When morning broke, Eugeo woke to find Kirito was already up and offering him something to eat. The painful thoughts of the previous night had left him once again. Kirito made no mention of being embraced by Eugeo, but the blond boy could tell that there was something different about Kirito’s happiness this morning. He smiled when Kirito looked away to lead them on their journey to Centoria.
“The final stretch!” he cried.
Eugeo laughed and hurried after his partner. Even if Kirito wouldn’t speak of it, he knew that his partner appreciated the comfort. Eugeo silently vowed to always be there to comfort Kirito from that day forward, for he loved him too much to turn a blind eye to his pain.