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“Yugyeom, you have to let go of me, okay—”
“No!”
Jinyoung sighs, half exasperated, half fond. The little boy is seated on the floor, arms and legs firmly wrapped around Jinyoung’s leg, little face buried into the denim.
It’s been a bit of a rough week for Yugyeom.
One of his mother’s friends apparently made a comment to him over the weekend, about how grown up he was now and that he would be going to kindergarten after the summer was over. Needless to say, he didn’t take that very well.
As per Jaebeom’s account of events, Yugyeom demanded to know if that meant he wouldn’t be attending pre-school anymore. Jaebeom wouldn’t have the heart to tell him, but his sister had no such reservations.
Well, Jaebeom said later, if she wants a sobbing toddler ruining her sleep for the sake of honesty, that’s her problem, not mine.
“Yugyeommie, please. I have to lock up and take you home.” His second attempt goes ignored. The subsequent ones also do not work. He gives in at last, squatting down and running his palm over the boy’s head. “Gyeom. Please talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong? Is it because those ladies told you about going to kindergarten?”
Yugyeom sniffs.
Jinyoung takes that as a yes.
He gently pries Yugyeom’s fingers away with one hand, the other fumbling with his phone and shooting Jaebeom a text that he hasn’t left yet. The reply he gets is almost immediate—is something wrong?—and it makes him a little guilty: are they all waiting for him to show up for dinner? He manoeuvres them so he’s sitting with the boy in his lap, clutching onto his shirt.
Nothing’s wrong, he types. Yugyeom just a little emotional atm.
“Are you scared about going to kindergarten?” he asks, assuming. “It’s nothing to worry about, you know? Remember the first day you came here? You didn’t want to, right?” His phone pings with another message. On my way. Jinyoung rolls his eyes and steamrolls on. “But now you like being here with all your friends, right? With Jungkook and Bambam and everyone? They’re all going to come with you to kindergarten, okay? You’ll still have your friends.”
Another sniff.
Okay, so that’s not the problem?
“Kindergarten is going to be fun, Gyeom.” He’s late enough that he decides to stand up holding the kid and get everything done one-handed. “You’re really smart, so it’ll be easy. You can learn a lot of new stuff. Won’t you like that?”
Nothing.
Jesus, then what is the issue here?
He hazards another guess. “Is it because you won’t see me?”
The boy’s grip on him tightens.
“You’re definitely going to see me, Yugyeom!” he laughs a little, slinging his backpack over a shoulder and swiping a hand across the switchboard. The lights go off, plunging them into darkness. Jinyoung carries him out where the streetlamps light up the parking lot, locks up and sits back down on the front step to wait. “I’m not just your teacher, I’m your uncle JB’s boyfriend, too, right? So I can come visit you at home and everything.” The boy looks marginally less miserable.
It’s not a case of lack of object permanence, he thinks, overcome with affection for this tiny human. Yugyeom knows he still exists when he doesn’t see him, it’s more that the kid mostly associates him with the preschool. That’s probably his fault. He sees Yugyeom so often here that it never occurred to him to make sure they interact more outside.
Well, today’s dinner will help.
“You’re not getting rid of me that easily,” he teases, tapping Yugyeom’s nose. He gives his teacher a wet giggle.
Jaebeom pulls into the parking lot soon enough. Jinyoung wonders just how many laws he broke to get here this soon. He sets the boy onto his feet and gets up, dusting his trousers.
“What happened?” Jaebeom slams his way out of the car, anxious. “What’s wrong?” He kneels to hoist up his clingy nephew, casting Jinyoung a worried glance. He smiles, shakes his head.
“Nothing to get worked up over.” He leans in, pressing a kiss to Jaebeom’s lips. “Gyeomie’s already thinking about the future.” It’s an ambiguous enough answer—earns him a that-sounds-suspicious-we’re-talking-about-this-later’ look.
Jaebeom turns away to buckle the boy in.
-
“And then he slipped! Like, actually, slipped on the banana peel like you see in the cartoons!” Jinwoon howled, throwing his head back in mirth. “I didn’t even think that happened in real life!”
Jinyoung presses his lips together to stifle his amusement as the rest of the table erupts in laughter, particularly Yugyeom. He casts his gaze around him, soaking in this feeling, this feeling of family.
“Did you film it?” Jaebeom asks eagerly, reduced to a child, like he always is when he’s around his older sister.
“Minho did, I think.” Jinwoon reaches into his pocket for his phone, but Yerin stops him. No phones during dinner except for emergencies is a rule here, as Jinyoung learned just an hour ago. Jinwoon nods at his wife, mouths later to Jaebeom.
He gets congratulated on his result, gets asked when the graduation ceremony is and if they would be allowed to attend (this nearly shatters Jinyoung’s heart), and about the twins and when they would return—which sparked a whole new conversation; Yerin was quite interested in hearing about his family. She and Yugyeom have met them once, but apart from that, she knows nothing.
And Jinyoung could talk about them for days. He doesn’t manage to hide the love quite as well as he thinks; he catches a whiff of eau de lovesick idiot from Jaebeom.
Yerin gets up when Yugyeom’s head lolls to the tabletop with a thunk. The rest follow.
It’s later, when Jaebeom goes to tuck in the sleepy boy, when Jinyoung is stubbornly doing the dishes, that Jinwoon decides to talk to him. They’re alone in the kitchen.
“Sometimes I hate my job,” he murmurs, drying a plate. “I feel like my son is going to grow up a stranger to me. Coming home every few months isn’t enough, is it?”
For another child, perhaps it would be. Not for Yugyeom. Jinyoung has heard things that the boy tells him matter-of-factly, but he knows they don’t stem from nothing. He stays quiet.
“I can’t even do anything about it until January.” He forces a smile. “I’ll get a transfer.”
“Yugyeom doesn’t resent you,” Jinyoung says carefully. “He’s not quite old enough for that. But he does…miss you at times. It’s not your fault.”
“Isn’t it?” But it’s peppered with relief.
“You don’t neglect him. He’s far more adjusted than a lot of his friends. Trust me, I would know, Jinwoon-ssi.”
This earns him a smile. “Don’t. Just call me hyung. We’re family, aren’t we?”
Jinyoung’s cheeks turn a little pink.
Thankfully, Jinwoon doesn’t demand a response. “You don’t know how glad I am that he found someone. Someone like you.” The question is apparent on his face, so Jinwoon adds, “His first priority is always us. His family. I can’t tell you how many times he’s blown people off because we needed him. Not everyone is nice about it, either. But you get it. You’re the same, aren’t you?”
He does get it. He’s been in the same situation for the twins.
Jinwoon sets aside the last dry plate. “You guys ever talk about, you know,” he gestures, “the future? Making things serious?”
He considers this. “Not…exactly. I—I think we’re on the same page, though?”
“It’s not my business. But for what it’s worth, we’d all like you to stay.” Jinwoon claps him on the shoulder and strolls out of the kitchen.
Jinyoung stays where he is, breath leaving him in pieces. Does the man not realize how significant that statement is? How does he think he can just say that and walk away? Maybe that’s best; he’d rather have a breakdown alone.
Footsteps.
Arms sliding around his waist. Lips pressed to his jaw.
He sighs, leaning back a bit.
“What were you two talking about?”
He shakes his head, twisting a little to smile. “I love you.”
Momentarily, Jaebeom pauses. “I love you, too.” His eyes narrow. “Are you okay? Did hyung say something to you?”
“Nothing bad.” He turns fully, looping his arms around his boyfriend. “Can you take me back to mine? I need to clean up the place before the twins get here tomorrow.”
“Yeah, sure. They going back after they get their results?”
“I don’t think they’ve decided yet. They might. They’ve got stuff to do over the summer. Hyunjin’s aiming for an internship at JYPE.”
“Oh yeah, you mentioned.” Jaebeom rests his forehead against his, tired. “Do you want me to stay the night?”
“If you want to, yeah, I’d like that.”
(Later, he realizes how he responded. Less uncertainty, more readily asking for what he wants.)
“Okay.”
They stand there, quiet, but their silence has never bothered them. He breathes in the faint scent of Jaebeom’s cologne, peaceful.
“You heard from little Youngjae yet?” he asks, curious. Jaebeom had all but adopted him after that whole display at the preschool, willing to work with him in his off time and see what he’s made of. Jinyoung guesses that he would be laying low for a while after pissing off his parents. A part of him is still worried.
“Not yet. I’m sure he will, though.”
They jump apart when Yerin comes bustling in. She rolls her eyes at them and offers them a drink. Jinyoung politely declines. They have to go.
“Don’t be hermits, you two!” she calls as they tug on their shoes. “I expect you here at least every other week!”
Jaebeom grasps his hand and laughs against his lips.
“I think we can manage that.”