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Lay Upon My Altar Now Your Love

Chapter 8

Notes:

(See the end of the chapter for notes.)

Chapter Text

Ares half expected to never see Thanatos again. He knew perfectly well how difficult such conversations could be, and he particularly knew how letting somebody down gently could be hard. That was the result he expected, should Thanatos indeed turn up for that talk; an apology for his earlier, harsh rejection and misunderstanding, and a gentler rejection that might, perhaps, allow them to still work together as colleagues.

To Ares’ surprise, it was barely two weeks later when he next saw Thanatos.

Ares was in the courtyard again, sparring. He did so as often as he could, wanting to keep his skills sharp. Today his partner was Phobos again. Both he and Deimos were eager warriors, but Phobos was the more meticulous of the two, and dedicated himself more frequently to his training. He was good enough to give his father a challenge.

Ares, however, almost dropped his sword when he saw the dark-clad person floating at the edge of the courtyard, in the shadow of the wall, hood up and eyes squinting against the sunlight.

Phobos instantly pounced on Ares’ hesitation, and though he got his blade up in time to avoid being gutted, he found himself on the defensive, unable to regain his momentum. After a frankly embarrassing few minutes being chased around the practice area he called, “I yield” and lowered his sword.

“My, Father! It’s a rare occasion indeed that I come out victorious!” Phobos grinned, showing slightly pointed teeth.

“Treasure it, then,” said Ares shortly. His heart felt it it wanted to beat out of his chest with an unaccustomed nervousness that bordered on fear. “But now I’ve a guest to attend to. Excuse me.”

“Of course.” Phobos nodded, and Ares sheathed his blade and turned to where Thanatos hovered.

“…Lord Thanatos.” Ares gave him a carefully measured nod. He wanted to fling himself to his knees, but he would do no such thing. And not only because of his dignity in public.

“Lord Ares.” Thanatos’ voice was soft, gentle, and he gave Ares a small, but strangely sad smile that pierced the war god through like an arrow.

“Come, let us speak in private.”

“Yes.”

Ares led the way to his bedchamber, but this time took a seat in a chair there, gestured at another set beside it. Thanatos considered, and tugged the chair out so it was facing Ares before gingerly sitting in it. Ares noticed that he pulled the edge of the long hooded cloak he was wearing over his skeletal hand as he sat, as if to hide it. He frowned at that, but didn’t say anything.

“So. I was tempted to let this all lie and ignore it. Yet I was here on Olympus today, and I feel, well… I feel it would be unfair to leave you believing an untruth. I am… Not always good at making myself clear. Not always good, either, at understanding others.” Thanatos looked down at his lap and sighed. “I have spent my time gathering shades, and that requires little speech. So I think… I think I have misjudged you, and I think I have made you believe that…” He paused, fiddling with the hem of the cloak with his other hand. “When you said… I mean, you’ve spoken of debts so often. That first time, when you cut your hand. You said it was to be even. And I asked. I wanted to know! I asked other gods. I was told you were…violent. Angry. Things I knew but they seemed to think badly of them. They also said you were fair, though. Just. Honest.”

“I try to be,” said Ares, his voice, so used to the tone of command and the shouts of the battlefield, coming out soft. “Though I have not been honest with you.”

“It’s…hard. Sometimes. When you… When you care.”

“Yes. Risking the heart is more perilous than many a war.”

Thanatos looked up, his eyes meeting Ares’. “What you said, when you made the offering. You said you wanted to serve me. If not to pay a debt, then why?

“Debt was easier to speak of. I lied about that from the first,” said Ares. He turned his hand over, unable to keep from smiling just a little at the pair of white scars across his palm. He had scarred both times, against all odds, as if the fates had blessed him. “I didn’t cut my hand to make us even, when I gave you back your sword that one time. What use is pain for pain, blood for blood? I cut my hand because I hoped it would scar, because I wanted a mark, from you. Because…” He swallowed. “Because that battle was when I first truly noticed that you were beautiful. I think, sometimes, that you’re the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.” Ares looked up at Thanatos. “Recall, too, that I live with Aphrodite sometimes. I do not say that lightly.”

Thanatos’ eyes went wide.

“Although don’t tell her I said so, it will get us both in trouble if you do.” Ares banished his smile for the moment, hoping Thanatos would take that to heart. “I lied after that, too. Promising I’d give you any boon in exchange for a few more minutes with my Pyrene. I would give you any boon merely for the asking. Saying I was in your debt for saving me from Sparta, may their hubris be ever cursed. I have been in your debt since the moment you existed, I think. I feel as though I was meant to serve you, meant to put my domain, and myself, in your power, always. Because…” Ares’ heart was pounding, this fear greater than he’d ever known in battle, even when his son, Fear himself, used his full power. “Because I love you,” he said, finally.

Thanatos drew in a soft gasp. His voice shook as he said, “Ares, promise me you don’t lie about this. Promise me. If this is a lie, I think it will break me.”

“No. Not this. I lied because it was easier. Saying this has not been easy, but it’s nothing more than the truth. I’ll take whatever scraps you can spare me, Lord Thanatos, I ask nothing of you. But I love you, and I should never have denied it, to you or to myself.”

Thanatos brought out both his hands, suddenly seeming heedless that one of them was bare bone, and caught Ares’ hands with them. Words poured from him all at once, in a flood. “When I saw you, standing above the pit, come to save me, when it was you there… I had been hoping, all the time I lay trapped, that it would be you. I told myself I didn’t know why, or that it was because your violence would be best suited to finding me there. Any number of excuses. But that wasn’t it. I wanted it to be you, for the same reason I went immediately to find you when Charon told me you’d gone missing. For the same reason I took souls on the battlefield for so long, when they were always meant to belong to my sisters. For the same reason it nearly broke me, to think you only made an offering to me out of obligation. Because I love you too. Because I fell in love with you at least a little bit the first moment I saw you, and I’ve fallen more in love every time since.”

“Oh, my Lord Thanatos…” Ares fell forward out of his chair, onto his knees, clasping both of Thanatos’ hands fervently.

“I was so sure that you couldn’t possibly love a creature like me,” said Thanatos. “I know very well what Olympians think of me. Even in the House of Hades sometimes it’s not much better. It was easier to believe you felt obligation, than to risk hoping it was love.”

“But it is,” said Ares. He lifted Thanatos hands, first the living one, then the other, and pressed a kiss to the back of each.

“I…” Thanatos looked down at him. He was smiling, but there was an uncertainty to the set of his brows. “I am beyond amazed to have your love, Ares. Truly. I find I don’t know what to do with your service, though. I have never imagined myself being… Being whatever it is you want me to be to you.”

“My Lord,” said Ares, swiftly, firmly. “That is what I wish. To serve you as a mortal retainer serves his lord. In whatever way pleases you.”

“I…see. But what if I want is for us to be equals? What do we do then?”

“It’s not about greater or lesser,” said Ares, frowning, struggling for words. “Is the soul of a king heavier than that of his retainers, when you carry them? I know we are equals. Peers. Colleagues, even. But I want to make you happy. I want to find every small thing that brings you pleasure and do it. I want to give you offerings, even if you don’t need them, just so you can feel worshiped.”

Thanatos’ brows smoothed. “I believe I understand. And doing this is what would please you in turn? For I wish to please you too, Ares.”

“It would. Immensely.”

“Very well. Shall I call you my disciple, then? I remember you saying that. I remember every word you’ve said to me, I think.”

“My Lord. Nothing would please me more than to be your disciple.” Ares kissed Thanatos’ hands again.

Thanatos pulled his hands free of Ares’ grip and rose. “Come, then, my disciple. I would have you please me now. I think you can begin by undressing me.” He smiled, making Ares’ heart jump as he added, “It was…very good, when you were taking care of me before, and did that for me.”

“Gladly, my Lord.” Ares felt his head spinning. Could this be real? Could Thanatos have really accepted his service, called him his disciple? Could he really be about to do at least some of the things he’d long dreamed of?

He had to pause to take a breath and still the shaking of his hands, but then he began to remove Thanatos’ clothing, starting with the cloak he’d worn. Ares removed each bit of armor, each item of clothing, with slow reverence, setting them aside on the chair carefully. When he was finished, he sank to his knees and looked up, awaiting his Lord’s will.

Thanatos cupped Ares’ cheek in his hand, stroking his thumb along it. “Very good. Now, perhaps you can disrobe yourself?”

“Of course,” said Ares, rising again. Thanatos went and sat on the edge of the bed as he did, watching intently. Ares felt the weight of those golden eyes on him, and it was a good feeling. He knew how he looked, he had no false modesty, and it seemed that Thanatos found him good to look upon. So he would willingly lay himself bare in body. That was easy, after all, compared to having just laid bare his heart.

By the time he’d finished undressing, Thanatos had moved, shoving several pillows together at the head of the bed and reclining against them, legs spread. Ares needed no command to know what to do about that. He came to kneel between Thanatos’ legs, looking over him. He truly was gorgeous, with his pale, ashy skin perfectly set off by the long, silver hair spread around him, his golden eyes like some skilled jeweler’s accent to his beauty.

Ares felt blessed indeed to be able to touch that beauty. He drew his hands over Thanatos’ skin, savoring how it was cool compared to his own. He savored even more then way Thanatos’ eyes went half-lidded at the touch, his head tipping back as he relaxed. One part of Thanatos was not at all relaxed, though, and becoming less so the more Ares touched him. Ares finally couldn’t resist any longer, and stroked his hands down Thanatos’ hips, then inward to curl one lightly around the death god’s cock.

That too was cool, rather than hot, and blushed with gold darkening to bronze. At Ares’ touch, Thanatos made a soft sound of pleasure and murmured, “Very good.”

Ares bent and kissed up the length of it, slow and sensual, letting the kisses grow wet, tongue caressing as well as lips. That got another sound of pleasure, and the touch of Thanatos’ hand against the top of Ares’ head, carding through his hair.

Glancing up at Thanatos, Ares said, “You can pull on it, my Lord,” before ducking his head and taking the tip of Thanatos’ cock into his mouth. Thanatos’ fingers tightened in Ares’ hair as he gasped, probably not even on purpose, and Ares wanted to chuckle, but was much too occupied going down further, taking as much of Thanatos into his mouth as he could.

He was pleased to find that was all of it. Ares knew what to do with a cock, but more of his lovers had been women than men, so he was perhaps less expert than some, and had never quite managed the skill of deep-throating an unusually large cock on his own, though of course being roughly used by a partner who would take his mouth was always good. Thanatos wasn’t that sort, though, Ares knew, and so it was pleasing to be able to take his cock all the way, letting his tongue press up, swallowing around Thanatos’ head as it just pressed into the back of his throat. To his utter delight, Thanatos’ kept the tight grip on his hair, and even began to use it to guide Ares, setting the pace as he started moving up and down on Thanatos’ cock.

Ares groaned in pleasure, his own cock more than hard, but far more focused on finally, finally being able to serve his lord. Centuries of pent up longing couldn’t be expressed in a mere few minutes, but Ares did the best he could. He threw his all into it, diving down eagerly as deeply as he could each down Thanatos pressed down, and working his tongue over every bit of it every time he drew back.

“Mmm, Ares… That is so good…”

Ares felt a shudder go through him at the praise. He moaned around Thanatos’ cock, going down deep and staying there, even when Thanatos gave a gentle tug back.

Thanatos gasped. “Ah! Oh, yes!” He tensed suddenly, and his other hand came up, the bare bone of it harsh against Ares’ scalp as he gripped tightly and began to push down.

Ares groaned, swallowing repeatedly around the head of Thanatos’ cock, not wanting to pull back. He couldn’t get a breath like this, but he didn’t care. What use was divinity, if he couldn’t do better than a mortal at pleasuring his lord? So he ignored the urge to breathe and stayed down. Thanatos seemed to fully understand his desire, too, for his hands kept pushing down hard, holding Ares in place.

“Oh, Ares…” Thanatos groaned loudly, grip tightening even further, hips lifting, and then with a low cry he came, giving Ares the reward he wanted; Thanatos’ seed, as cool as the rest of him, thick and bitter-salt and wonderful, shooting down Ares’ throat.

Ares felt overcome with it, a thrill as great as any physical pleasure he’d ever felt. Gods below, how long, how badly he’d wanted this, and hadn’t even been willing to admit it to himself. He stayed just where he was until he’d gotten every last drop, until Thanatos’ cock began to soften in his mouth, before finally nudging back against the pressure of his lord’s hands holding him there.

Thanatos immediately let him up, letting his hands fall to his sides with a long sigh. Ares looked up, and smiled, thrilling again to see the pleasure on Thanatos’ face. “You’ve done very well, my disciple,” he said after a moment, and shifted, head lifting to look Ares up and down. A mischievous little smile lifted one corner of Thanatos’ mouth. “I think you should now take care of yourself for me. Just where you are. And sit up straight and spread your legs out, so that I can see.”

Ares felt a flush bloom unexpectedly on his cheeks. He hadn’t expected that command. Hadn’t expected any command in particular, so early on, when Thanatos obviously wasn’t use to taking charge of anyone. Yet he felt his cock jump at the thought of it, and immediately moved to obey with a breathless, eager, “Yes, my Lord.”

Thanatos leaned his head on one hand, smiling, and watched as Ares knelt obediently straight-backed and with thighs apart, knees jut touching Thanatos’ own still-spread legs. Ares curled his hand around his cock, which was thick enough that even his own fingers could only just enclose it, and began stroking.

“Very good.” There was something hungry in Thanatos’ gaze as he watched, and Ares shivered with it. He tightened his grip and stroked faster, chasing pleasure, while part of him wondered just what exactly he might have unlocked, by getting Thanatos to do this. That thought was as arousing as anything else, and it hardly took any time at all for him to be on the edge, breathing hard and stroking himself rapidly.

“Come, Ares,” said Thanatos, his voice low, his eyes fixed intently on Ares. “Come for me, now.”

“Oh, yes, Lord!” Ares came instantly, almost shocked at how easily Thanatos had pushed him over the edge. His seed spurted out, getting all over the bed and on Thanatos as well. When it was done, Ares found himself breathless, muscles trembling in reaction.

Thanatos sat up and reached out, cupping the back of Ares’ neck and pulling him in for a kiss. The motion was commanding, sending another little thrill through Ares, but the kiss was soft, sweet, and with a post-coital glow lingering in him, Ares found himself melting into it, kissing back tenderly.

“Thank you, my Lord,” murmured Ares, when Thanatos released him from the kiss.

“You’ve pleased me well.” Thanatos smiled, his cheeks flushing again. “In fact I enjoyed that much more than I’d anticipated. I thought that, well…” His brows drew together. “I suppose what I was thinking was that I would make a small effort to do something harmless enough but not at all interesting to me by commanding you, in order for you to be happy. But, ah, it turns out I am interested after all.”

“I’m glad. I wouldn’t want you to do something you dislike only to please me, my Lord!”

Thanatos shook his head. “I didn’t expect to dislike it, merely to find it…neutral, perhaps.” Thanatos’ teeth suddenly showed in a grin. “But it seems that you’re fun to have under my thumb. And speaking of, you have made an absolute mess of us both, my disciple. How shameful of you. What do you think you should do about that?”

“Forgive me, my Lord.” A tingle ran down Ares’ spine. “I will clean it immediately.”

“Good. Do so.”

Ares rose, giving Thanatos a glance for reassurance that this was permitted. He’d had the thought perhaps Thanatos had a method in mind—perhaps even the particularly humiliating method of licking it up—but it seemed not. He would have attempted it if commanded, but was glad enough to grab a cloth and clean the mess from Thanatos’ skin, and off of himself next. The bed was more difficult, but he got it as clean as he could.

“Very good,” said Thanatos with a nod. Then he sighed, a less contented sound this time. “Unfortunately, my duty is calling. I’ve left it long enough this time.”

“I understand, my Lord,” said Ares.

Thanatos rose. “Dress me, my disciple,” he said, his tone turning commanding once more.

Ares felt that pleasant shiver again. “Yes, my Lord.” He obeyed, picking up the things he’d set aside and helping Thanatos back into them. When that was done, he didn’t bother to dress himself, but knelt again. “Thank you for letting me serve you, my Lord.”

Thanatos reached down and stroked his hair, then bent and kissed his forehead. “Thank you also, my disciple. I look forward to letting you serve me again soon.”

“I also,” said Ares.

Then Thanatos was gone, vanished in his usual flash of green light.

Ares rose, then sprawled out on the bed. The entire last hour or so felt completely surreal, utterly impossible. “If I’m dreaming, then I should pray to Hypnos that I never wake,” he murmured to himself, and laughed. It was no dream, it was real, and the only other god he would be praying to now was Thanatos, his lord at last.

Notes:

Thanks for reading! (Forgot to post the chapter notes last night, oops!) Anyhow, this was super fun to write. I have adored the idea of Ares being actually very soft for people he loves, and it was fun to put that into my own story. Coming up next, Ares being not soft *at all* but in a fun way!

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