Work Text:
Wei Wuxian could hardly believe what he was holding in his hands at the moment. It was a card. A fucking wedding card. Between his ex-lover and his own brother. What the fuck?
Deep down, Wei Wuxian supposes he had always known his relationship with Lan Zhan wasn’t perfect. It honestly wasn’t hard to see how the differences in their personalities had created rifts between the two. They had their fair share of disagreements over many topics, and it was only natural as their personalities were such opposites of each other.
But Wei Wuxian was so quick to overlook those rifts because he was also so damn in love with the man. Lan Zhan was like a breath of fresh air in the storm of chaos that was Wei Wuxian’s life. He was the calm that allowed Wei Wuxian to take a step back and simply exist right there in the moment. Wei Wuxian had thought his own personality would help Lan Zhan too. That it would help him come out of his reserved shell just a tad bit more. It had never occurred to Wei Wuxian that Lan Zhan didn’t need to come out of that shell, that he didn't want to. That it was okay for him to stay in the silent comfort he liked. Wei Wuxian didn’t think that, but apparently, Jiang Cheng did.
Jiang Cheng. Oh, how Wei Wuxian regrets ever introducing the two to each other. It was supposed to be a normal dinner for the Jiang siblings to meet Wei Wuxian’s boyfriend of six months. In fact, Wei Wuxian was actually worried at first. He always knew Jiang Cheng was overprotective of his family and would be quick to disapprove of Lan Zhan if he even sensed anything remotely dissatisfying in him.
But no. The dinner went perfectly. It was a little too perfect if someone were to ask Wei Wuxian. Jiang Cheng and Lan Zhan got along like two peas in a pod. And Wei Wuxian was so ecstatic about their bonding that he actually forgot what it was the two had actually bonded over. (It was later that Wei Wuxian would learn that it was an author of a romance series the two were both following that bonded them. The same series that Wei Wuxian used to tease Lan Zhan about for reading, claiming it was ‘weird’.)
After that dinner, Lan Zhan had started to inquire about Jiang Cheng regularly.
“Wei Ying, how is Jiang Wanyin doing?”
“Wei Ying, how long will Jiang Wanyin be staying in the city?”
“Wei Ying, when will you invite Jiang Wanyin over for dinner again?”
And finally, “Wei Ying, what is Jiang Wanyin’s phone number?”
And Wei Wuxian answered all the questions dutifully. He really hadn't thought anything of it. He thought Lan Zhan had made a friend in his brother and that was the extent of it. Now, Wei Wuxian is not so naive to still believe so. Now Wei Wuxian knows that Lan Zhan was indeed falling for the man he had called his brother since they were 8 years old.
Jiang Cheng gave Lan Zhan everything Wei Wuxian didn’t. A sense of comfortability in his own skin. A sense of peace in his own personality.
Jiang Cheng didn’t tease Lan Zhan about his reserved nature for his own amusement. That was something Wei Wuxian admittedly did a lot of. Jiang Cheng didn’t insult Lan Zhan’s culture and family rules whenever they were in Gusu for a dinner party. Instead, he followed all of the rules dutifully without complaint. The same could not be said for Wei Wuxian. And most of all, Jiang Cheng respected and admired their old teacher, Lan Qiren. The same man who had raised Lan Wangji into the man he is today. Wei Wuxian, however, could never refrain from making a comment at Lan Laoshi’s expense ever since their school days at age 15.
And that was enough for Lan Zhan to realize how much better he could get from someone else out there. It was enough for Lan Zhan to realize how much of a mistake being with Wei Wuxian over someone like Jiang Cheng was. It was enough for Lan Zhan to break up with Wei Wuxian a few days before their one-year anniversary.
When Lan Zhan sat him down at the table in the apartment they shared that night, and told him he had wanted to break up, Wei Wuxian didn’t understand. At the time, Wei Wuxian hadn’t noticed the growing affection in Lan Zhan towards Jiang Cheng. He kept asking Lan Zhan why. Why did he want to break up when everything was going so well in his view?
At first Lan Zhan had avoided his gaze and just repeated the same line over and over again, “Wei Ying, please. I’m not happy anymore.”
But Wei Wuxian couldn’t take that for an answer. Why wasn’t Lan Zhan happy anymore when Wei Wuxian still was? What changed?!
Wei Wuxian kept pressing and pressing, begging Lan Zhan to explain what it was that went wrong so that he could fix it as disbelieving tears were streaming down his face. But Lan Zhan had always been difficult with words. And the replies that came out of his mouth weren’t enough. So Wei Wuxian got angry.
He remembers distinctly how he had stood up and yelled at Lan Zhan for him to just use his words. That it wasn’t difficult, that everyone does it.
“Lan Zhan just fucking speak! It's not that hard dammit, everyone does it!”
And that was enough for all semblance of self-restraint in Lan Zhan to just snap.
Lan Zhan stood up with a furious expression on his face, and then he proceeded to effectively render Wei Wuxian himself speechless.
“I am not happy in this relationship because of you, Wei Ying. You were the first person to ever actively seek me out and befriend me, and for that, I will always be thankful. But now I am under no false impression that the way you treat me and those important to me is correct, or respectful. Your brother unknowingly taught me that, Wei Ying. And unbeknownst to him, I have fallen for Jiang Wanyin. I no longer want to be with you when there is someone else who treats me better despite only being a friend. That is why I want to break up Wei Ying.”
That was the first time Wei Wuxian had ever heard Lan Zhan say so many words simultaneously. And then he left. Lan Zhan had already packed up his belongings prior to the break-up and just left. Just like that. And Wei Wuxian had just stood there staring blankly at where Lan Zhan had been, wondering to himself how he had fucked up so badly.
And now, 5 years later, Wei Wuxian stands in his living room holding a wedding card from his brother and his ex. Wei Wuxian didn’t even know they were fucking dating. He was so distraught after the break-up, and so angry at his brother for unknowingly stealing away the only person he had ever been in love with that he had left without a word. He moved all the way across China to Qishan and now lived near Wen Qing and Wen Ning while working on his own inventions.
He’s barely talked to Jiang Cheng since. They talked once, a few months after Wei Wuxian had subsequently disappeared. It was a phone call from Jiang Cheng begging him to come home, not understanding why he left him. Wei Wuxian had simply told Jiang Cheng that he was fine where he was, and to not contact him about coming back again. He was still so angry. He didn’t even confront him about Lan Zhan because Wei Wuxian always thought there was no way his Didi would ever return the feelings. For fucks sake, he thought Jiang Cheng was straight!
Well, he had been wrong about that too. Because now Lan Zhan and Jiang Cheng are getting married. As in, they are going to start a family together. As in, they are going to vow to stay together for the rest of their lives. And Wei Wuxian could hardly process that.
Because even after all these years, no one has ever been able to satisfy him as Lan Zhan had. No one had ever been able to pique his interest in the slightest like Lan Zhan had effortlessly done. Even after all these years, Wei Wuxian is still in love with Lan Zhan.
Numbly, Wei Wuxian looked back down at the wedding card. He pulled out his phone and called Jiang Yanli, the only person he regularly kept in touch with due to her insistence to check up on his well-being.
“Hello? A-Xian?”
“Yanli-Jie, yeah it's me.”
“Oh, A-Xian! Have you received the wedding card I mailed to you? A-Cheng is getting married!”
Wei Wuxian swallowed down the bitterness rising in his throat.
“Yeah Jie, I did. He’s getting married to my ex.”
“Ah, A-Xian...do you know how many times A-Cheng asked about you to me? When A-Zhan confessed, A-Cheng didn’t accept him immediately because he wanted your blessings. He wanted to talk to you in person about the situation, but you left! He called you begging for you to come back but you refused, hung up, and then blocked him. What else was he supposed to do A-Xian? Wait for his brother to come back in order to move on with his life?”
“A-Jie I was just so mad. He stole my Lan Zhan away from me! What was I supposed to do!”
“A-Xian, no. A-Cheng did not cause your break up. From what A-Zhan had told me, you caused the end of your relationship on your own. That is not for A-Cheng to blame.”
Wei Wuxian could hardly believe his ears. Jiang Cheng didn’t even accept Lan Zhan at first, only to then accept him after Wei Wuxian burned the bridge between them. And now A-Jie was scolding him for his own misery.
“A-Xian are you still there?”
Wei Wuxian heard her sigh on the other end of the line.
“Yeah A-Jie, I’m still here.” His voice cracked a bit at the end.
“Listen A-Xian. Just come back and face them. Running away does you two no good. Just think about coming to the wedding, okay? It’s your little brother getting married after all.”
Wei Wuxian wanted to scream. He wanted to cry. It should be me who's getting married! Not him!
Instead, he took a deep breath and replied to his sister as calmly as he could.
“Alright A-Jie, I’ll think about it.”
And he would. He would think about how he failed the best thing in his life for the rest of his days. He would think about how he would never again be the one Lan Zhan loves. He would think about how he would have to watch as everything he had ever wanted goes to his brother instead. He would think about how, for the first time ever, he was the one coming second to Jiang Cheng.
Oh, he lost. Wei Wuxian lost so badly. And he can’t even do anything about it.