Chapter Text
She was dreading dorm life. Moving in had already been a pain since she ended up using the stairs to bring up all her bags just so she could avoid all the freshmen occupying the elevator. At least on the stairwell she didn’t have to worry about being crammed into an enclosed space with a bunch of strangers. She had no intentions of making friends while at college–they’d be fake anyway, probably mocking her every time she wasn’t there–so it was the best solution.
Still, her body was sore, and, admittedly, watching parents interact with their kids between each trip up and down the stairs made the dull ache in her chest sharper. Her own moms and dad didn’t seem interested in helping her and seemed conflicted on being pissed at her for going to college and being indifferent to her going. No one bothered to wake up to say goodbye, nor did anyone mention it the night before. Even so, Toko had turned on the coffee pot in hopes the aroma would awaken one of her moms, but, in the end, nobody did. So, her chest aching, she clambered into a packed car and made the long drive over.
Now, in her own dorm room, she was surrounded by a handful of boxes with all her meager belongings from her room at home. It wasn't much and she realized how little she had to fill the place. Never having a room as big and as clean as this, she was certain the space would feel overwhelmingly empty since she occupied it alone. It was something she had been excited about originally too and she had been stashing away the money from self-publishing for it in secret. It was luck, she thought at the time, that it didn’t appear anyone was in the room adjacent, leaving the whole bathroom to herself.
Sweat ran down her forehead and, despite how much she didn't want to, Toko convinced herself to take a shower, if only to put off going through the boxes for a little while longer. It was hot, scalding. It reminded her of home and her parents whom she loved as much as she loathed their entire existence. She wondered if they even noticed she was gone yet or if they would at all.
Pulling on new clothes from her luggage, she redressed herself into a sweater and a knee-length, black skirt along with white socks and her weathered, brown loafers. With rehearsed familiarity, she braided her hair back into the tight braids she had worn since she was a child. She barely glanced at the reflection in the mirror, fully aware of how she looked and hating it with a feeling like no other.
Feeling pathetic and lonelier than usual, she decided she’d deal with the social anxiety and sneak to the local coffee shop that her beloved Byakuya Togami had been said to frequent. She figured that, maybe, the feeling would go away when she caught the angel of man in her sights, admiring the way his golden hair framed his face and his blue eyes bore into a subject that caught his interest. Maybe the word angel wasn’t right? Toko was sure he was a god among men; better than her own insignificant self.
If only she could touch him and see their future together, like soulmates always would. If only she could get close enough.
She had been in love (or what she had assumed to be love) with him for a while, ever since his school came over to her own for a club tournament in debate. The way he spoke was so regal, demanding that she found herself going to the boring event just to hang off his words for the short time he spoke. She had attempted a few meetings since, but they were fruitless and, even if he did appear to look at her, it felt more like he was looking through her. At such a prestigious university, though, she was sure could capture his attention, prove herself worthy of even licking his dress shoes.
So, she had made her way down the hall one more time towards the exit, certain it would be her last time that day after she returned. It was still buzzing with activity, something she expected, but she was getting frustrated with the number of people blocking her way. At some point she found a boring, brown-haired family standing in the middle of the hall as some girl with a massive brother complex wept about his leaving. She was about to shoo them away when a scream erupted down the hall and, startled, she paused herself in the middle of the movement.
It didn’t take for the source to show itself: a large man with dreads storming down the hall with a fitting face of horror and a much shorter, athletic female with ginormous, bimbo boobs behind him. Toko figured he must have copped a feel. It was probably an accident too since big boobs like that always grabbed attention and, when he passed by, she probably thrust them in his direction. Girls with big boobs were always like that. Toko, however, lacked the assets and wasn’t a whore. The only person she’d ever offer herself up to would be her master, not any guy who might show interest. Well, not that they would show interest in her anyways; no one did.
Toko watched as the little sister in front of her took a step back to avoid the running duo. The two passed, but the girl got stuck on a backpack’s strap and she began falling back. It wasn’t niceness that had Toko’s arm outstretched, but a fear that the other girl’s head would bash her own head in. Her arms ended up around the other’s waist while her breath got knocked out of her chest.
The female, after a breath, tilted her head up and her desaturated green eyes met Toko's gray ones. The girl's short bob left her face clear and Toko wanted to scoff that, despite how normal the girl was, she was undeniably cute in a frustrating sort of way.
A weird sensation began to stir within her and Toko felt her hands lock more securely around the other as an electric feeling began to stir from the back of her head and moved forward. Her hands began to tingle, making her grip on the other tighten in an attempt to numb the feeling. The feeling was too much and it didn’t help that nausea began to swarm her senses; unbending and demanding.
She was going to pass out. She knew the feeling well and her mind rounded back to the times her parents had locked her in that closet for days and how the dark void offered no condolences in her situation. Panic rose into her throat until the darkness fully closed in on her with only those green eyes of the other girl visible.
Then, with a blink, she was no longer there and her heart raced as the feelings from moments prior dissipated.
She was now in a bedroom of some kind, but not one she recognized and she was unable to remember where the gap in her memory began. The walls were lined with rows of bookshelves, a number being classical novels and, to her own surprise, her own novels on a dedicated shelf (some of which she didn't even recall writing). On the other side rested stacks upon stacks of manga and figurines from said manga, something Toko boiled down to a lack of respect to actual literature. Even if they had a number of classics, the fact that someone put them adjacent to the other was a sure sign of disrespect.
So, on the off chance she had been kidnapped, she was sure that her kidnappers were idiots.
Another difference she recognized was that her clothes had been changed: she was in a halter dress. The dress was made of black cotton and fell high on her thighs, much higher than she would have chosen for herself, and with a v-neck collar that rested in between her small breasts. The dress hid little and it didn't take long to realize she lacked Jack’s scissors that would usually be tucked away on her upper thigh. The scars that usually laid right beside it were much lighter than she remembered despite her latest addition being more recent than she liked to admit. Furthermore, her hair fell much lower than she remembered, but, seeing as she always had it braided, she blamed it on lack of attention. She brushed it back behind her ears, wishing she had a hairband to secure it with.
She then considered this being Genocide Jack’s doing, despite not remembering sneezing in the dorm hall while she was holding that girl. The notebook used to communicate between herself and her other half was no longer on her to reference either. Last she remembered, it was in her bag which was nowhere she could easily spot at the moment. Her only option, then, was to move forward and hope for the best since bringing that other idiot out of the deep recesses over her brain was more likely to cause issues than be helpful.
The bedroom door wasn’t locked when she tried it, so she exited the room without further hesitation. It was warmer outside of the room and the distant sounds of banging pans from down the hall let her know the house wasn’t unoccupied. She peered out the window to her side and noticed she was in an apartment complex of some kind, a couple of floors up. It appeared to be sunset, but it was still unnervingly hot for what September should have been. It felt more like June or July instead, but she brushed that thought away. Weirder weather has happened and, well, there was global warming, right?
She caught her face in the mirror for a moment as she walked, but quickly turned away. She didn’t want to see her reflection right now, something about seeing her hideous face was making her even more sick to her stomach.
Rounding the corner, she found herself in the middle of an open living room and, to her left, she found the source of the noise. In a modest size kitchen stood a woman in front of some pans on the stove and a few feet from a fully dressed up table. She looked oddly familiar, but not in a way Toko could place. She had yet to see her face though and she wondered for a moment if she should even let her presence be known.
When she accidentally kicked one of those touch-operated children’s toys across the floor, she realized it was too late to make a decision. The noise was enough for the girl to perk up and turn around.
The woman had shoulder-length brown hair, green eyes, and a cute face, but she was much older than herself. She was probably in her mid-thirties, but Toko had never been good at placing ages. She wore a high waist dress with sleeves and a cut that fully accentuated her breasts. The olive green and red floral design of the fabric did little to add to a womanly charm though. In all, the dress felt a bit too childish for someone of her age, but Toko supposed it might attract some of the manwhores she had met.
“Toki!” The other female squealed, setting down the wooden spoon in her hand. “Come over here! I wanna see the dress on you in full. Give me a spin too!”
Toko reeled over the nickname from a stranger: she didn’t even have friends, so Toko didn't know where this lady got off knowing her name and feeling close enough to make a punitive deviation of it. Well, for a stranger, they did look awfully familiar–
Almost like that girl from earlier, but undeniably different. Maybe she had passed out and those boring brunets had taken her hostage. Maybe this was an aunt or family member of some kind then too; that would explain the similar appearances. Toko took a couple of steps closer, but only to observe the other in closer detail.
The girl watched with avid interest, biting her bottom lip as Toko approached. Toko had the weird feeling she was prey being observed by a predator. The thought alone almost made her dash for the front door.
“Awe, no spin? So mean,” the other female moaned with a pout, before perking up unbothered, “You look gorgeous in that dress though. I’m glad you decided to wear it for me.”
Toko raised an eyebrow but didn’t speak as she watched the other female move closer to her. Much too close to her, nearly chest to chest. With a panicked inhale, Toko was about to take a step back but was halted when the other girl spoke again.
“I’m really excited about our night together, Toki. I’m so glad Makoto took Kotoko for the night: It’s been long since we’ve had the house alone,” she said, her tone dipping into a sensualness that had Toko sweating, “We can do whatever we want...and you can be as loud as you want too. I don’t mind.”
When the other girl reached for her, Toko snapped back to reality and quickly shuffled back.
“Who are you? And where do you get off thinking you get to talk to me like that? I already have master Byakuya, I don’t want some boring, big-boobed bimbo.”
The other paused for a moment before a humored smirk appeared on her face.
“Really, that old game again? You’re full of surprises, Toko.”
She moved forward again, but Toko forced her hand forward, stopping her.
“No, I’m serious. Who are you?"
The other paused once again, her hands falling to her side as she blinked a couple of times as if she were confused. Toko felt a prickle of fear shoot up her spine and she wondered if her useless body could still make it to the door in time to run out. Then, Toko considered how the other was in a kitchen, a full knife block within reach. She was screwed, wasn’t she? Had she become a slave to some old, kinky, delusional lady while she was knocked out? What the hell had happened to her?
“Is...now the time?” the other finally spoke, tone oddly vacant, “Are you past Toki?”
“Past Toki? Who is Toki ?” Toko pressed. She hoped her bark sounded strong enough because only one part of her had a bite and she wasn't about to use it if she didn't have to. “I’m Toko Fukawa. I don’t know you, so refer to me as Fukawa. Only master Byakuya gets to refer to me so fondly.”
To her surprise, the other laughed like it had been the funniest joke in the world.
“Oh, man...I forgot your obsessions with him. God, for my past self’s sake, get over that. You're ours . I'm way more dreamy than that guy anyway,” She said, “My name used to be Komaru Naegi, but, since we’re married at this point, I’m Komaru Fukawa. So, call me Komaru.”
My last name? She had to be kidding …
Toko wanted to scream and she barely bit it back too.
This lady is delusional and like hell do I plan to use her first name or my last name to refer to her.
“Past self? What are you talking about?” Toko sneered, “And I’m not yours , you old hag.”
“Oh, yeah...” Naegi said, playing with a strand of her hair unbothered, “You said our first introduction might go like this. Well, I’ll make it easy. You’re in the future Toko’s body and I’m your soulmate. It’s good to meet you after so long.”
A jab of pain shot through Toko’s head. She looked down at her shaking fingertips and clenched hard.
“How… do you expect me to believe you? Do you understand how crazy you sound?” Toko said, “This could be some elaborate plan to make me a sex slave or sell my organs to the black market.”
Naegi pressed a finger into her cheek and drummed the rest of her fingers against her lips, seeming to consider the statement. Toko felt relieved she showed some signs of having half a brain cell because, even if it were true, there was no way she would believe something like that so easily. If this girl was her soulmate, she should know that too. Well, unless being a bumbling, optimistic idiot took away her commonsense.
“Well, you left your notebook on the table over there. It says everything in it, so, if you don’t believe me, read that. I’ll be making dinner in the meantime. I haven’t burned it yet, so wish me luck and take your time, okay? Jack’s been writing the most in it, but you should find your own entries too.”
Toko flinched at the name and her mouth dried.
Jack? How...did she?
“Go ahead, Toko, it’s all detailed there...uh, just don’t get too flustered though.” Naegi’s face burned a brilliant pink tone against her tanned skin. “Your future self and future Jack tend to document everything .”
Naegi finally turned and walked back to the stovetop, stirring the contents in the pans.
Toko moved for the journal with rough, uncalculated movements as her legs threatened to give out under her. There was no way someone could replicate either of their scrawls. Not to mention that Toko could tell a fake when she saw one, so she knew she wouldn’t be fooled. Trying to regain her composure, she flipped it open. As soon as she turned a couple of pages in, she was sure she’d be able to tell this old creep to–
But...how?
It was her own. It had to be.
All the unique, near nonsensical trademarks of her and Jack’s writing styles were there. It was almost like another language: one she wasn’t even sure she could explain given the opportunity but could read without hesitation or stutter. It was muscle memory that wrote it most days too, so the fact it was so perfectly done made it hard to deny. The problem was that the dates were of nearly fifteen years in the future which would make her thirty-four.
If Naegi had been the very same one she caught in the dorm hall and she had been a high schooler by looks alone at that time, then how old was she? It had been Naegi's older brother, a freshman like herself, that she was sniveling about leaving. So, give it fifteen years and she was probably thirty-three at most, maybe even thirty-two.
Toko wanted to deny it. Throw the book at the woman and duck out the door.
Then she saw an entry dedicated to herself : a nineteen-year-old Toko.
Hello.
The fact you’re reading this means Omaru listened to what I said and that you finally showed up. She’s not lying, first and foremost. She’s too dumb to do stuff like that. Secondly, she’s not Byakuya Togami. Your soulmate is not Byakuya Togami. You won’t let that go though. I didn’t either, but you need your future self, out of anyone, to be honest with you.
Komaru Naegi (or Komaru Fukawa) is your wife, your soulmate. You don’t have a lot of time with the future her, so make the most of it. She’s an idiot, but she’s ours.
Sincerely, yourself, Toko Fukawa.
P.S. If you’d like (which I doubt), Jack's entries can back this up as well...I’m not sure if you’ll be ready to read those though. But, if things go the same as they did for me, you will anyways.
And Toko did flip through more pages, skipping through the entries and flinching at the more in-depth descriptions of intimate moments and tears and other mentions of domestic life. Both of which were in her own writing and Jack’s (with Jack’s always being more explicit by far). When the pressure in her chest became too much, Toko threw the book hard, knocking over a vase from the dining table.
Naegi looked up from the stove and whined.
“Not that vase…it was so expensive,” Naegi says, placing the wooden spoon down and moving towards Toko once again, “So, do you understand now, Toko?”
Toko shook her head, vehement and disturbed.
“How could someone as plain and normal as you match up to Master? How are you my soulmate?"
“Well, fate, probably. I’m pretty pleased on my end,” Naegi laughed, “Anyways, I can surpass that stick in the mud in every way, especially in making you happy.”
“Hah, as if,” Toko scoffed, “Only master can please me. I don’t want some high schooler with a brother complex.”
Naegi’s eye twitched.
“I don’t have a brother complex, I can guarantee that.” Naegi moved in quickly, grabbing Toko’s tiny wrist and pulling her forward so she couldn’t escape. “And I’m certain I could please you better than Togami any day.”
“There’s no way someone like you could ever please anyone, even someone like me.”
“Wanna bet?”
“Sure, as if a–”
Naegi moved forward, pressing her lips against the other. It was calculated on the other’s end, but Toko remained like a brick wall against the kiss until, for some reason, she wasn’t .
It wasn’t a conscious move that had her wrapping her arms around the other’s waist nor was it a conscious move to allow the other to wrap their arms around her head, pulling their lips closer. Toko felt something slippery against her lips, a tongue, and gasped at the feeling. Naegi took the initiative to slide her tongue in, pleasure shooting up her spine. Even if something about the action felt good and had her squirming, Toko couldn’t breathe. She pressed hard against the other girl to escape.
Naegi let go after a moment and Toko took a couple of steps back, gripping her sore chest. Desperate for air, she breathed in and out deeply until the burn in her ribs settled.
“Oh, dork, you need to breathe in through your nose,” Naegi laughed, “Sorry, I didn’t realize I was suffocating you. Current-you already has that part down.”
“That was my first kiss!” Toko complained, but her fingers settled on her lips and rubbed the sore flesh. “I...you…!”
Her heart was pounding into her ribcage and the words wouldn’t find their way out of her mouth. She couldn’t believe it, she didn’t want to. Toko may be ignorant in some regards–it came with being a fallible human–but even she couldn’t deny the other girl knew her weak points (of which Toko didn’t even know) with practiced precision. Still, admitting it? There was no way she could.
“Heart racing, huh?” Naegi teased. Toko glared.
“No, definitely not. Not by some old lady like you.”
“You’re older than me usually,” Naegi chimed in before dismissing the topic with a hand, “Anyways, make sure you call me Komaru, okay? It’s almost like I can feel you not using it. We’ve been together for years, I don’t even want to hear my old last name with your voice.”
Naegi stared at her expectantly.
“C’mon! Say Komaru , Toki!”
The pleading, yet determined look seemed to grow in severity with each passing second. The intensity became too much and Toko sighed and reluctantly agreed.
“ Komaru. There! You happy?”
“Yep!” Komaru smiled, before tapping her chin contemplatively, “ And , while I still have you, if you want to flirt with me indirectly, I love the smell of lavender or roses. It would be best if you wore both. It’d drive me crazy.”
Toko raised an eyebrow at her. “Is my natural scent not good enough for you? If you really are my soulmate, you should like me for how I am.”
“You used to use generic shampoo and conditioner back in college because it’s what your family let you have,” Komaru explained, a flicker of anger on her face, “We searched for one that resonated with you so that nothing of your parents remained in your life, even in soap. Rose and lavender are what you chose. That’s why I like it, dork. It reminds me of your first happy shower.”
Toko flushed at that.
“What...a dumb reason.”
“Yeah,” Komaru laughed, “And I’m dumb. So what? It’s what you like about me, Toki.”
Toko sputtered, wrapping her arms tightly around herself. Komaru watched her with avid interest, that content smile never leaving her lips as she observed. Eventually, Komaru broke the line of sight once to glance at her notebook still lying on the floor where she threw it. There was a troubled expression across her face before she spoke.
“Hey...this is a hard request, but can I see her before you go? We’re running out of time and I don't want Jack to feel left out.”
Genocide Jack? She wants to see her?!
“You want to see her?” Toko asked, her mouth falling agape. Her hands impulsively gripped the opposite shoulders, skinny fingers wrapping around the bony joint, as if to sturdy herself.
“Of course! I married you both!” Komaru said, “Anyways, I have more than enough experience with her at this point. Trust me, nothing she could do or say would surprise me. She won’t hurt me either, don’t worry.”
“...’Course she wouldn’t. You’re not a cute boy.”
“Ehh, she can make exceptions…” Komaru said, before quickly shaking her head, “Not the point! Can I? I have some pepper on the table too, so it’ll be quick!”
Komaru grabbed the pepper shaker on the table and brought it forward towards Toko. Her movement was hesitant, almost willing to back down if Toko really was against it. For whatever reason, Toko didn't. Instead, her numb hands eventually wrapped around it and brought it closer to her chest.
“I...don’t know what’s going on or...why I want to agree...Just…” Toko's breath caught in her throat and she clutched her hand harder around the shaker. “You better not regret this, all right?”
“Trust me, I won’t.”
So, with one breath more of hesitation, Toko brought the shaker up to her nose, inhaled, and let out a loud sneeze. The pepper shaker dropped to the floor with a thud.
Genocide Jack looked around the room, surprised to find she was not in a college dorm or somewhere familiar in their crappy hometown. Instead, it seemed to be a living room of some kind, toys scattered around her feet, and the smell of burning food in the air. There was an older woman in front of her too, not one she recognized either, who seemed to be expecting something out of her.
“Who...are you?”
The inflection was snotty as she turned her head, skeptically scrutinizing the other. Even if she didn’t know what was going on, she could at least play herself into a more dominant role regardless how desperate it might end up being. So far, it never steered her wrong.
Her hands crawled down her empty thighs and her fingers twitched in the absence. The lack of scissors or, at the very least, a strap to hold them, was odd. The seductive dress was also unusual given Toko’s personality, but Jack didn’t want to make any deductions yet. She didn’t know what was going on, but she didn’t sense immediate danger. Further, Toko hadn’t felt scared prior to her entrance.
The female in front of her stepped forward and Jack’s thoughts were back on target. The other offered a smile instead.
“Hello! I’m your wife and soulmate, Komaru Fukawa, formally Komaru Naegi.” The girl gave a shy look down, scratching the edge of her cheek. “This is your flashforward and I asked to speak to you before you both went back.”
Jack held back the snort.
Huh, not what I expected. Interesting...
“Well, that's pretty nice of ya,” Jack said, tapping her index finger against her lip, “but I’ve always pegged four-eyes as straight. Whatever happened to our dear, master Byakuya, hmmmm?”
Komaru cracked a grin.
“I swept you off your feet, so you decided to drop him.”
Jack found that really hard to believe. As open as she was to surprises, this would be too much of a surprise. Then again, it was a conscious effort that Toko switched, so maybe there was some merit to what the other was saying? Or was this some elaborate scheme? Altogether, this situation was hard to make a call on.
It was like Komaru could sense the hesitation.
“This is a lot to take in. Toko didn’t believe it either, but it’s all in your journal on the floor.” –Komaru motioned to an abandoned, weathered journal on the floor beside a broken vase–”So, feel free to read it. I’m sure you’ll recognize the writing quite well.”
The tone was cheeky, so Jack kept her eyes trained on her as she moved towards the book, snapping it up while avoiding the glass shards. Once in her hands, she retreated far into a corner so she couldn’t be surprised while she read. She knew better than that after all.
In the end, though, it only took skimming a couple of pages and seeing a dedicated note to Toko to feel satisfied. With a sigh, she closed the book and threw it nonchalantly back to where it had once been on the floor. It landed with a thud , further scattering glass shards as it slid.
Sauntering back over to her wife-to-be, Jack offered a lop-sided smile.
“Well, even I couldn’t make up that steamy garbage, so you’re obviously not lying,” Jack said.
She peered around the body, admiring every curvature and memorizing every detail. Komaru seemed undisturbed, laughing as she allowed the other to physically and visually wonder her. If anything, it seemed the female was amused by the antic.
“Well, well, well ! You’re obviously used to the gawking from future me, but let me check out the merch a bit more then. C’mon, give me a spin!”
Komaru giggled but complied with a quick twirl.
“Nice, nice . I quite enjoy the assets, but aren’t blue-striped underwear more of a schoolgirl thing? Kinda perverted for an older woman to wear them, huh?” Jack said, moving forward to pull up the end of the dress to peak at the underwear again.
Something about the smile on Komaru’s face said even this wasn’t abnormal for them, so Jack continued unabashed. Well, actually, Jack knew that she, herself, wouldn’t be bothered. She had a pretty high tolerance to not being embarrassed, almost as if the switch between the two only existed in fleeting instances. Nevertheless, it was enjoyable to not have a violent or adverse reaction to her antics. This Komaru seemed like she would be fun.
“Oh, don’t worry. I wore them for future you,” Komaru said, a smirk perking up her lips, “We have a date tonight and you always really enjoy it when I wear them.”
“Understandable,” Jack muttered, “I am a woman of good taste. Sucks our poor master romance didn’t work out, but, alas , even Romeo and Juliet didn't truly end up together! We could always keep him in the basement though–Wait! Does this place have a basement–”
“Or…” Komaru grabbed Jack’s attention by grabbing her shoulder. “I could give you a kiss! Really seal the deal on being soulmates and I’ll promise to keep wearing this kind of underwear, among other things, long into the future.”
“That’s a long term investment, though.” Jack deflated, before nodding her head up and down after a thought. “Although, denying you offers no fun benefits! So, might as well kiss! Deck one on me, Dekomaru!”
“Dekomaru...that’s where that name came from?” Komaru only seemed disappointed for a moment, before sighing. “Well, you asked for it. Your lips are gonna be sore, Jack.”
“That’s fine–”
Komaru delivered, placing a hard kiss atop the other’s lips and wrapping her arms around the other’s waist this time. Jack didn't wait to jump in, running her long tongue against Komaru’s bottom lip. Once Komaru opened her mouth a bit, Jack took to exploring further; her tongue against the other’s teeth and then against Komaru's tongue, dominant and quick. She felt a shiver run down her spine and pursued it eagerly as a heat built in her chest. Komaru moaned against her lips and tried to display the same vigor. However, as into it as she seemed, Komaru's arms unwrapped around Jack and began to push her back after a few minutes.
Jack had breathed through her nose, so she was breathing mostly fine, but she had obviously taken the other off guard. Komaru, despite a cheesy smile on her face, was wheezing as she caught her breath before she could squeeze some words out.
“ Hah , I guess I should be glad that it took some time for me to make out like that with you in your timeline. You calmed down... hah …a little bit by then.”
“That’s kinda boring. Spicy moments should always be pushed to the edge. That's why people take the ones they like on scary first dates, really gets those love hormones pumping! Kyeehahahaha!”
“I already...” Komaru swallowed hard, her lungs finally catching up, “I already love you, so no need.”
Something shook in Jack’s chest. It was like the feeling she had with her master, but quieter , more filling maybe. She chose to ignore it.
“Love me? Don’t you mean you love four eyes?”
“Both. I love both of you.”
“We’ll see about that,” Jack said, rolling her eyes.
“Oh, you will. I wouldn’t do all those things in the journal with someone I didn’t love.” Komaru nodded with a distant smile. “Hey, Jack, I know we haven’t spoken long...But is it okay if I say goodbye to Toki? I don’t think you guys have much time left and I want to leave a good impression.”
“Mmmm, I suppose…” Jack consents, “Well, whatever happens, don’t forget your promise. I want to see lots of things too! Not just striped panties.”
“Don’t worry, future-you already made sure I had more than enough in the closet.”
Jack snorted at that before reaching down and securing the pepper shaker in her hands. With a final wink, she inhaled the pepper and sneezed.
Toko, albeit winded, took the lead in her place. She looked dizzy, not as used to the switches as her counterpart. Komaru reached up to grab the other girl's cheeks in her hands, pressing soothing circles into the smooth skin where her jaw bone rested. When she seemed cognitive enough, Komaru spoke.
“Hey, Toko, I know this is a lot to take in, but I want to say it before you go. You said it for me when we met for the first time too, so…” Komaru grins, her eyes watery, “I love you. I love you both with all my heart. I’m so excited to meet you two again.”
The world started to darken around her and Komaru seemed to recognize that within Toko. The world became centered solely on those olive-green eyes and, despite being able to hear perfectly fine, Toko's tongue seemed unable to move in her mouth. The most she could offer were gargled sounds.
Komaru didn’t seem to mind, offering a loving look in the way she peeked past half-lidded eyes. Toko could only watch as the girl spoke once again.
“And, Toki, you never have to be alone again, okay?” Komaru was crying now, her grip on Toko tightening. “I’ll always be there for you. Both in your time, now, and well into the future. I love you–”
But the words were cut off. Her ears felt vacant at the loss.
She was back in the dorm hall once again, holding up a much younger version of Komaru, those olive-eyes unchanging. She saw the girl crack a smile upon seeing her, but Toko couldn't break the shock enough to return it. She was disoriented: she was surprised she was standing by herself, much more holding someone else up. She can vaguely feel the other girl’s breasts against her arms, but couldn't find the strength to move away either.
The other girl, through shaky legs, managed to stand up, Toko’s arm falling limp at her side, before turning around to face her. Her eyes stared into her own with fascination and determination, not unlike her future self. Toko didn't find it within herself to look away. Instead, she stared. Komaru stared back with equal vigor.
“What’s...happening?” Toko could hear Komaru’s brother speak, but she didn’t move to look at him. “Why do you both look like that? Are you guys okay?”
Neither her nor Komaru offered a response and, instead, Komaru gave her a cheesy, hopeful grin. Part of Toko wondered if it was problematic how little Komaru seemed to change despite the years of difference. Komaru didn’t seem like a bad person, but she hardly trusted superficial feelings like that. Even if they supposedly had fifteen years together, she wasn't about to lose her commonsense any more than she already had.
God was she embarrassed getting swept away like that like some damsel in a mediocre romance plot.
“Toko Fukawa...It’s nice to meet you," Komaru finally spoke.
The difference in voice quality was more noticeable: it was higher-pitched and whinier. Yet, with that said, it didn't bug her as much as she thought a voice as grating as that could be. It was comforting and she almost wanted to believe such an overtly expressive tone like that couldn’t hold malice. Toko flinched at the thought. Hoping to cover up the moment of weakness, she spoke as well.
“Komaru Naegi, huh?...” Toko bit down hard on her inner cheek, looking down at her loafers instead of those big, hopeful eyes. “You pervert.”
Her mind flashed back to that kiss, how future-Komaru basically forced it on her. Well, maybe she did instigate it, but consent was key! She hoped her future self got back at Komaru in some way too.
Toko paused.
Thinking something like that...Am I really accepting that Komaru’s my soulmate?
Something told her it was hard to fight such indisputable evidence. She had touched the girl and saw a future. Part of her felt sick. It couldn't be Byakuya she saw in her flashforward, but some crybaby, nondescript girl.
Then she remembered Komaru’s kiss, her journal, and the note from her future self. She didn't know what to make of it. Was this really the better option? Could she not be happy in a reality with someone as magnificent as master? Especially when she hadn’t tried?
“Pervert? You’ve got to be kidding! You’re the pervert here.” Komaru seemed indignant, but despite her reaction, threw her arms around Toko for a hug and Toko stiffened under the sudden contact. “You should have seen what you did to me–”
“Umm, speak for yourself! Now, get off me. I barely know you. You have to work for a hug, even from someone as repulsive and disgusting as me.”
“That’s fine!” Komaru said, squeezing hard on her shoulder before, finally pulling away. Toko, with her ribs no longer constrained, breathed in deep as she observed the obnoxious eagerness of the other. She could barely believe someone as stupid and presumptive as Komaru was supposed to her soulmate. The thought made her laugh and she almost considered pretending the whole situation never happened.
Something told her it wouldn’t be that easy. The girl looked persistent.
The brother spoke again, but Toko was caught off the guard when Komaru’s mother, wearing a white sweater dress, placed a hand on her shoulder and curled the digits across her skin. Part of her wanted to shrug it off, but she allowed it. It was probably the side effect of shock that she did and she felt a repulsive, cold chill run through her as the urge to escape began to build in the back of her head.
“Welcome to the family...Toko, was it?” The mother spoke, but Toko was too caught in the glimmer of those straight, white teeth to pay attention. The trance was only broken when the warmth on her shoulder disappeared and the male, Komaru’s father probably, spoke.
“We have to finish saying goodbye to our son and then we can let you steal Komaru for a bit. I’m sure you both have a lot to talk about.”
Stealing their daughter? They seemed far too calm at the possibility for Toko’s sanity. Feeling a hot embarrassment run through her, Toko found herself turning back to Komaru, finding comfort in her form over the other two who were virtually strangers. Well, Komaru was too , but not nearly as bad.
But, in a sense, it was just as bad. She barely knew the future Komaru, not this one. Thus, she couldn’t really know what to expect from her either.
“No kidding,” Komaru said, her eyes meeting Toko’s without a second thought or shred of doubt. Her green eyes stared into Toko’s own and she ran through the flashforward once more in her head. This girl would be her girlfriend, her lover, her wife. Hers.
Future Komaru had said that neither version would ever leave her alone again. As stupid as she felt about believing the words of someone who didn’t exist quite yet, she found those words repeating in her head. Toko remembered Komaru saying she wanted to see her again and something about that resonated within her. In her head, she decided, she could admit she wanted the same no matter how stupid it might be.
She just had to get there now. One step at a time.