Chapter Text
Reno opened his eyes and closed them again.
He did that just to make sure it's not a dream - because the smells, the silence, the comfortable warmth surrounding him - all that was telling him he's not in his apartment.
Right. They came back to Rude's place.
Reno sighed and stretched, enjoying the feeling of velvety sheets pulling against his fully clothed body. He rolled to the side, facing the rest of the bed. The cover's edge was unrolled there, the pillow still bared the dent in the shape of Rude's head. Reno reached over, smoothing down the fabric.
He haven't been here before, not entirely. He shot a glance inside once, while waiting for his partner to gather his things. One big bed, a build-in closet, a small bedside table. Dark, abstract painting hanged on equally dark wall, now painted in stripes of white daylight, peeking through unprecisely closed blinds.
Minimalistic and classy, Rude didn't like to own many things. Reno loved even that about him.
A random thought caused a shot of unpleasant sensation in his guts. A memory of what happened few hours before. Reno curled in on himself, eyes wide opened, mind clear.
They talked. They talked a lot. Or was it just him, with Rude listening? He wasn't sure.
He remembered bits of it - had to fall asleep in the car, because he woke up in Rude's arms, being carried inside the apartment. The leather couch, crawling over Rude's lap, his gloved hands, hot as the sun itself, clasped on his pale cheeks to keep his head in place. Those warm, amber eyes, staring him down to the very core. Letting him know their owner is willing to hear him out.
So he opened his mouth. Told his partner everything, hypnotized by his dilated pupils.
I watched you from afar.
I admired your skills. Your looks.
I hated how good you are at everything. I hated how much it was affecting me.
I was jealous of what you can offer to the world. I wanted it all to be mine.
And please. Reno's sure he said "please", like a thousand times. Rude's eyes remained the same throughout it all. They closed at some point, leaving Reno staring at his thick eyelashes, his hands wrapped tightly around Rude's forearms. And then...
Reno touched his mouth, lips feeling slightly numb. Rude's face closed in on him and suddenly he couldn't speak anymore. But also then it all turned to black. Rude either punched him, or kissed him. The lack of his presence now was absolutely horrifying. Did he leave? Is he waiting just outside for Reno to leave?
Even knowing that, Reno didn't move. Despite the cold realization, slowly spreading over his brain, he wanted to enjoy this moment as long as he could. His first and propably last.
Slow steps could be heard from outside the bedroom, the door creaked open, and Rude shuffled into view, fully dressed and already looking like a milion gill: purple shirt, silky tie, perfectly trimmed beard.
He walked in, bringing with him a whiskey glass full of clear liquid, and a sense of calm Reno knew all too well. A heavy feeling of conclusion, of a mind made up. It emanated from his partner in a wide radius, like a slowly suffocating blanket, straining Reno's moves.
He managed to lift himself up on the elbows, avoiding Rude's gaze.
"Here." The only aknowledge he got - the glass showing up under his nose. Reno drank its content in one go, a familiar acidic aftertaste burning his palate. He should've expect that from Rude: the man always kept him in check, especially on a work day.
The matress dipped next to Reno, causing him to move his legs. Rude sat down facing away from him, staring at his gloved hands.
How fitting.
Nobody said a word for a while. Reno spinned the glass in his fingers, sunlight bouncing off the edges in quick twirls, creating a carousel of specs on the grey bedsheets.
Rude cleared his throat.
"Tseng called." He said. "We're up in an hour."
Reno could only nod, the pit in his stomach getting bigger with every passing second. That was it. He threw himself at the mercy of the court and was expecting a judgement.
What he didn't expect was his partner's body falling forward, and a pair of strong arms, wrapping around his waist. Reno blinked, his face now pressed tightly to Rude's collarbone. The rich scent of the cologne, freshness of the shower gel mixed with aftershave, plus something else, something intimately and entirely Rude, attacked him from all sides, shutting down his ability to think.
"I don't like men that way." Rude's voice cut through somehow, a low murmur in Reno's ear. He smiled despite himself.
"I know...me neither." His hands released the empty glass, but had no confidence to actually return the embrace.
"I don't date men." Rude spoke again. Reno lowered his head, even though his partner couldn't see him from this angle anyway.
"I don't date at all." He answered morbidly, causing Rude to chuckle, a rumbly, muffled sound wandered down his spine, making him shiver. He felt Rude's fingers intertwining against his skin and it made his heart skip a beat.
Rude sighed, nuzzling his neck. "You drive me crazy. One person, who can rile me up from zero to a hundred in a matter of minutes...What am I supposed to do with you?"
Reno shrugged. If his partner was trying to let him down easy, he was doing a great job. Safe and cosy, he'd stay like this forever, but wouldn't dare push his luck.
"I take whatever you give me." Reno closed his eyes. This slow build was killing him, he prefered the hammer to already fall on his head. Maybe he should push it, make Rude angry, so he beats him up and abandonds him, once and for all. Fast, like ripping off the bandaid.
"You piss me off so much I want to strangle you sometimes." Rude's hand slid over the back of Reno's neck, making all his hair stand on end. He jerked, fists clenched on the covers. "I don't want you here. And you're all I want. I don't-"
A little noise of frustration huffed next to Reno's ear. He looked up, his chest full of fluttering emotions - a ray of hope, roaring to life.
Rude was staring into nothing, his expression softened up with understanding, blending into affection.
"Can I kiss you?" A question he didn't expect. Not in such a shy tone. Reno laughed nervously, fingers kneading the sheets.
"You can. You could a long time ago."
Gloved hand guided him closer, making their lips touch.
It definitely felt like a first kiss, just how they describe it in movies - starting gently, with soft pressure, a chaste, clicking noise. Tips of tongues touching, prodding, sliding around themselves. Mouths opening wider, palms going up arms and necks, caressing all the skin they could reach.
It felt like molten fire.
Like he was about to catch flames and selfcombust.
Like he was about to die.
"Go shower." Rude whispered into his mouth, when they both gasped for air. "We don't have much time."
"Fuck shower." Reno clinged to Rude's shirt for dear life, almost tipping them both over with his weight. Nothing seemed relevant right now, the only real thing was this room, this bed and them on it. The entire Shinra Company could go fuck itself.
"Shower." Rude let go of him, getting up from the bed. He fixed his tie, his shirt, crumpled by Reno's greedy hands. "You stink of booze and misery. Can't let you enter the office like this."
His firm tone made Reno slither out of the bed, Rude's unyielding gaze following him all the way out of the bedroom. He showered obiediently, used all his partner's things, his shower gel, his bath towel, his shaving cream. Skipped the cologne - didn't smell nearly as good on his own skin for some reason. Drying down the hair with another towel, he tried to calm down, but he felt light as a feather, weirdly giddy and unfocused.
Work was going to be hard today.
Rude gave him a small smile, as he emerged from the bathroom, clothes shrivelled even more than usual. Handed him his jacket and waited till he put on his fingerless gloves. Gave him back his goggles and kissed his forehead, moving the red bangs away.
"Coffee?" He asked, making Reno stupidly happy.
Watching his partner walz across the small kitchen, taking out black mugs and turning on the coffee machine - Reno felt the ice inside his chest disappear, replaced by liquid hot tsunami of what he couldn't even name.
Their drive to work was uneventful - leaving Rude's home meant turning professional again. The work itself - Reno never felt better on the field than that day.
His wits turned sharper, his blows stronger, his speed - unbeatable. They ran through their opponents and came out victorious, with very little damage recieved. Rude scolded him for being reckless and it made Reno giggle, because he could feel it - the gentle whiff of emotions behind his partner's voice, the faint, but present aura of caring.
They came back to Rude's place after many hours, with limbs heavy with fatigue and eyelids full of sand. Reno followed his partner entirely unconciously and stand in the middle of his monochromatic living room, slightly confused. Oh right, that still wasn't his flat.
"Sleep." Rude said behind him and a dark skinned hand closed around his elbow, gently directing him into the bedroom. That should make him feel something, it did make him feel something, but Reno was too damn tired to react accordingly. He stripped absentmindely, accepting Rude's worn t-shirt as a night gown. Removed his gloves and goggles, kicked off his shoes and socks.
Let out a small gasp, when Rude tugged on his hair, sliding the silver clip off.
"Your side." His partner pointed at the bed, where he layed this very morning, then turned off the lights, and pushed the sheets away. Reno followed suit, jumping under the covers, his insides rattling with excitement.
His side. Something here that belonged to him now.
Rude's calm, steady breathing let him know the man fell asleep already. Leaving him in the pleasant darkness, unable to calm down the agitation. Head wedged into a pillow, heart beating itself to death, he bit his lip, struggling to calm down. He reached for Rude's arm, but stopped midway, doubts suddenly clouding the happiness.
He managed to fall asleep eventually, nestled at the very end of what was called "his side".
First days had a bit of awkward in them. They worked well together, but they had to learn how to live in such confined perimiter. Or rather, Reno had to learn how to move around this space, that Rude invited him in. And he gave it his best shot.
He brought only necessities back from his apartment, he cleaned after himself, or tried his best to do so, he folded his clothes, as well as he could, even though it still made it look like tangled heaps of fabric. He made an effort to do laundry one day, and felt stupid when all his shirts got a pink hue to them afterwards.
He attempted cooking, but only ended up burning the pot, and soaking the entire place with smoke. Went shopping for them both and realized he has no idea what kind of food Rude actually enjoys. It was frustrating to say the least.
And to make matters worse, Rude didn't comment on it. There was a look of surprise, sometimes a raised eyebrow, then hands would come around his wrists to take away whatever he was holding. Reno was great with guns, and beating the shit out of people, why were mundane everyday tasks so damn hard?
He didn't want to admit it, even to himself, how much he wanted to get Rude's approval, to show him it wasn't a mistake to let him in and let him stay. How afraid he was, that Rude was going to give up on him and they'll go back to just being bros.
One such day, while sorting out the next batch of clothing to wash - properly this time, hopefully - he somehow pulled a thread out of one of Rude's suits, making the button fall off.
"Oh for fuck's sake, are you kiddin' me?!" Reno shrieked, dropping the entire pile down.
Rude came back later that day, working an assignment on his own, to find him on the living room's couch, sewing the damn thing back to its place. Reno heard a sigh and tensed, hunching over his task even further, needle working twice as fast.
"What are you doing?" Rude put away his briefcase, methodically removing his jacket and glasses. Reno swallowed.
"Fucked up one of your suits." He answered, straining his voice to sound cheerful and upbeat. "No worries, I'ma fix it in a sec."
Another sigh, heavier this time. Rude came over and took a place next ot him, their arms and legs touching. "Stop it. It doesn't matter."
"Yes it does!" He felt panic washing over him. "I'll fix it, I'm almost done, I-"
Rude placed both palms on Reno's hips and gave them an encouraging pat.
"Come here."
And when Reno sat on his lap, suit jacket still in hands, like a child about to be reprimended, Rude poked his shoulder.
"Stop acting like a damn housewife. You're not one."
"But-"
"You don't owe me anything. Stop acting like you're paying for staying here."
"Just admit it - you see me ruining your things and you want me to stop." Reno let go of the suit and needle, defeated and useless.
"That too."
Humor was so clearly audible in his voice, Reno elbowed him on the stomach.
"Asshole. I'm trying my best!"
"You don't have to."
But I want to - danced on Reno's tongue for a second. I don't want you to regret it.
Rude got another idea.
"Is there anything you want from me?" He asked, out of the blue. It was Reno's turn to raise his brow.
"Like what?"
"What do you want me to do for you?" His partner rephrased, arms circling his waist in a gentle embrace. The answer was easy, so easy it slipped out of his mouth immediately.
"Nothing. Just...be."
"Then do the same for me."
Reno did as he was told. No more chores, washing dishes, doing laundry, which Rude took with a gigantic relief. No cooking attempts, unless it was a greasy overfried breakfast, or making food together, which almost always ended with Rude working and Reno watching him from the countertop.
It helped him settle in better, once Rude told him it's his place now too. Helped him bring in more of his things over, stop worrying about destroying his partner's shower with his hair dye, stop being concerned about bed space.
Rude accepted him entirely from the very start, didn't mind his clothes laying everywhere, didn't mind cleaning after him. Smiled, whenever Reno hugged his back, blushed furiously whenever got a peck on the cheek, or a genuine compliment.
Cold blooded killers, they were. Shinra's fists to deal with the world. Cynical, sarcastic, reserved.
They had good days and absolutely devastating ones. They fought the company' enemies, and they fought each other. Almost died few times, and got wounded plenty. Shouted at each other and bickered viciously, throwing blame around like a ping pong ball.
Despite all that, Reno was happy. No matter how many times Rude yelled at him, rolled his eyes at him, frowned at him - he would answer with a cheeky smile, or a wink, or even say something mean in return.
Because once back home, he'd throw himself into his partner's arms and accept whatever Rude decided to do with him.
Because what they had, seemed so solid. Well grounded. Indestructible.
"Hey Rude?" He asked one time. It was their day off, an evening spend on the couch in front of tv's mindless entertainment, with beer and snacks within reach. Reno's body splayed all over his partner's like a blanket, head tucked safely under the man's chin.
"Mmm?" Rude took a sip of his beer, still mainly focused on the movie.
"Why did you do it?" Reno asked ominously. Rude shot him a confused look.
"Do what?"
Reno felt his cheeks burning. It was a stupid question, long overdue, but somehow he never had the need to ask it.
"Took me in?..." He had no doubts about Rude's feelings towards him, he got proofs of them every day. "You know, you kinda...decided that out of nowhere."
"You're asking this now?"
Apparently so. Reno didn't respond, hiding his face more in Rude's chest. He felt his partner's fingers combing through the tufts of his hair.
"I wanted to." Rude said softly. "And you...helped me figure it out."
"I was drunk." Reno mumbled into his shirt. "And crying. You either took pity or advantage of me, basically. Or both."
Rude chuckled. Such heartwarming sound, it reverberated through his entire body.
"Sorry. I guess it looked that way."
"I don't get it, s'all." Reno continued thoughtfully. "The entire time you acted like a no big deal man, while I was a bundle of nerves. That's so unfair."
Rude stayed silent for a while, making Reno think he went back to watching the movie. It was pretty dumb of him to bring up that topic anyway.
"You want me to say it?"
"Well, yeah." Reno pushed himself up to his partner's level, lips pursed. "I said it, long fucking time ago. Your turn, you jerk."
He really wanted to hear it.
Rude smirked, pulled playfully on the longer strand of hair on the side of his head.
Said it, loud enough for him to hear it, warm enough to make him melt. Kissed him, to seal the words in, pulled him even closer.
"Satisfied?" He asked, once their lips parted. Reno couldn't stop smiling.
"Yeah."