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I Know I Do What I Want (But I Never Get Enough)

Summary:

Yue frowned. "It's kind of rude that we're being ignored like this."

Sokka shrugged. "I mean at least he knew our names." He continued to sharpen his boomerang. At Yue's quirked brow, he elaborated. "Usually Aang's the only one that gets recognized."

Yue narrowed her eyes at the scene unfolding in front of them. "Do you think you should tell him that Aang is a 12-year-old pacifist?"

Sokka smiled. "Nah. This is entertaining."

-

Or, where Aang "learns" to "master" the Avatar state.

Notes:

Edit from March 2024: I removed a section that discussed two-spirited Native Americans. I am not Native American at all and it was disrespectful to apply a western idea of gender to someone else’s culture, and for that I’m sorry.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

Sokka

The farewells were bittersweet. There was a favourable wind, Appa was well-rested, it was a beautiful day. Sokka turned his head to the sky. It felt bad to leave.

The last time he was on a boat like this, it was with his father and Bato. He wasn't old enough to go ice dodging yet, they said. They wanted him to be a child for as long as he could, to not have to grow up as quickly as they had to. It still wasn't enough. Bato had gotten hurt in a freak accident- a ship exploded and Bato was closest to the explosion. It hurt to not see his father. He had seen his ship. His father wasn't there. Sokka didn't have the heart to get on the boat.

There was no time to dwell on that.

Pakku, the bitch that he was, didn't show up. (Sokka was still proud of Katara beating him up, even if he did get splashed. Sokka had given into the respect women juice, Pakku had been avoiding it for like 60 years, that was too many. (Maybe Sokka should introduce Pakku to Suki, just as a treat (for Suki, not for Pakku.))) Apparently, Pakku did leave some sweet spirit pool water for Katara and Yue. Yue's father was there, bidding them farewell, it was nice and sappy. Zuko

"Katara!" Aang motioned onto Appa. Katara rolled her eyes, making her way onto Appa. "How was sneaking around a Fire Nation ship?"

"Stole some tea." Katara grinned. Aang looked simultaneously distressed and proud. "I'm just joking, Fire Lord Iroh gave us some." She lifted a bag. Sokka groaned.

"Okay, lovebirds, make some room! We have royalty with us!" Sokka placed a few bags on Appa's saddle.

Katara scoffed. "Royalty? Who's that, you? Oh yeah, Zuko and Yue." Her voice tapered off to an embarrassed murmur.

"Will Appa even be able to carry all of us?" Sokka continued despite his sister's interruption.

Aang paused. "Well, we only have, uh..." He counted on his fingers. "5 people here! That's not too many, plus, I'll probably be flying on my glider most of the time! Momo agrees, right?" Momo chirped. "See!"

Sokka turned around to see Yue and Zuko. Zuko frowned. "For some reason, I thought flying again wouldn't be as terrifying," Zuko said, falling back behind Yue. Sokka smirked, sliding down Appa's tail.

"C'mon, babe"- he pointedly ignored Katara's indignant scream of "Babe?!"- "It'll be fine. Just like our picnic."

"When we went on that picnic we saw warships."

"Yeah, I realize that now."

Suddenly, Sokka found himself being dragged by the arm along with Zuko. Yue huffed. "You boys are as slow as elephant-slugs." She said, but there was no real heat behind it.

Katara laughed. "I like you, Yue."

Yue smiled. "Thank you."

With everyone on board, they took off, ready to meet their escort to Omashu and find Aang an earthbending master.

-

The first person that greeted the group was a large man with a beard so big that Momo could be hidden in it. (In fact, if Momo hadn't been within his line of sight at the time, he would have assumed that Momo was, however improbably, hidden in his beard. Why would he grow out his beard that much in the first place? And even if he was growing it out that much why didn't he make it look nice? He was getting off-topic) He was flanked with... Sokka wasn't very good at math so he was just going to say a lot of soldiers.

"Welcome, Avatar Aang! I am General Fong and welcome to all of you, great heroes!" This was where Sokka expected the introduction to end. Most people didn't look past the 12-year-old Avatar, much less the companions that travelled with him. However, Sokka was pleasantly surprised when Momo-beard continued. "Appa, Momo, brave Sokka, kind Princess Yue, fierce Prince Zuko, mighty Katara!"

"Mighty Katara? I like that." Katara smiled. Hm, brave Sokka wasn't so bad. Still on the fence about 'kind Yue', that one seemed a bit... demeaning. As if somehow 'kind' summed up almost sacrificing herself for the good of the entire world. Sokka's opinion of General Momo-beard dropped significantly (yes he knew the guy's name was Fong. No he wasn't going to use it, he hadn't earned correct naming privileges yet).

He led them all up to his study and told them of his plan. "Avatar Aang, you're ready to face Ozai."

That was when the shit hit the fan.

-

Aang

Aang didn't quite believe it. Face Ozai? When he had done all of those things at the North Pole? Fire Lord Iroh was barely able to stand up to him! "What?! I haven't even started on earthbending! I barely have even mastered waterbending!" he protested. General Fong only fixed him with a glare.

"You have the Avatar state, don't you?"

Aang shivered, remembering his nightmares. The destruction he caused. He never wanted to have anyone see him like that again. "Yes, but-"

"Then you're ready."

Aang obviously wasn't going to get a word in edgewise, but Sokka did. "He can't just snap his fingers and go all glowy-eyed. Plus, at the North Pole, he had the help of the Ocean Spirit!"

General Fong raised an eyebrow. "How do you know?"

Yue stepped forward. "I was there when he merged with the Ocean-"

General Fong cut her off. "I want you all to look outside." He stood up and walked to the window. "We have been fighting with this rebellion for some time, your Fire Lord"- the word was spat with some vengeance, and Aang furrowed his brow. Fire Lord Iroh wasn't that bad, and Zuko and Yue seemed to share this sentiment.- "hasn't done much to fix anything." He motioned outside the window. There were wounded soldiers, bandaged arms, legs, faces. Aang felt cold run through him. All these people... and he really could stop it right now. Maybe Fong was right... "We need to fix this right now, nip it at the bud before it turns into something we can't control."

Aang paused. Fong had a good point.

He thought back to the Siege. Ozai was right there, he could have done something, but he was... a coward. Just like when he had run away, if he stayed he could have protected them. He could have saved everyone but he was too weak to save them. If he had only just stepped up to his responsibility (but wouldn't that mean that he had to cast away all the monks had taught him? All his moms had taught him?)... But if he wasn't brave then, maybe he could be brave now. He sighed. "I need to master the Avatar state first." He finally settled on.

General Fong smiled. "Excellent. We'll begin right now."

Aang blinked. "What?! Today?"

General Fong took on a dangerous grin. Aang suddenly began to regret his decision. "Yes, today. We have to finish this rebellion as soon as possible."

Aang gulped.

-

Yue

After that, General Fong didn't pay attention to them at all. It was nice but only in the sense that it was different. Usually, she was being fawned over, this was a change. That didn't stop her from complaining about it, though.

Yue frowned. "It's kind of rude that we're being ignored like this."

Sokka shrugged. "I mean at least he knew our names." He continued to sharpen his boomerang. At Yue's quirked brow, he elaborated. "Usually Aang's the only one that gets recognized."

Yue narrowed her eyes at the scene unfolding in front of them. "Do you think you should tell him that Aang is a 12-year-old pacifist?"

Sokka smiled. "Nah. This is entertaining."

Yue was inclined to agree. Watching Aang zoom around on his air scooter so fast that even attempting to track his path was making Yue disoriented. She leaned into Sokka more, letting herself be cuddled. If she was going to be here for the next few weeks, she might as well enjoy it.

"Is it working? Is it working? Is it working? Am I in the Avatar state?" Aang said so quickly that Yue barely registered the words. He was not in the Avatar state. "Is it work- Oof!" He slammed into a column, sliding down comically. Ouch. Yue got up to check on him.

"Don't do that, if you act like nothing's wrong he won't notice," Sokka whispered. Yue found that hard to believe but she didn't have siblings much less know anyone really younger than her.

Sure enough, Aang pushed himself off the ground with airbending. "Ouch. Did it work? Was I in the Avatar state?" He asked, brushing himself off. General Fong shook his head, stroking his beard in disappointment. "Oh. What's next?"

Yue honestly didn't understand how they had all survived this long.

-

Katara

Katara was awoken to frustrated mumbling. She yawned, letting the other person know that she was awake. She opened her eyes to see Yue on the side of her bed (General Fong had insisted for some reason that they all bunk together. Strange.).

"What's wrong?"

Yue sighed. "It's not a big deal but um..." It was now that Katara noticed that Yue's hair fell around her shoulders and hadn't been braided.

"I'll help." Katara volunteered before her thoughts could even catch up. What? Katara moved along the bed to sit beside the older girl. "How do you want your hair braided? I only know Southern styles." She admitted apologetically. The breaking daylight hadn't quite begun to breach the window, it still felt like night. The room was dark, and for that Katara was thankful because otherwise, Yue might have noticed her darkened face- That is your brother's girlfriend! Katara mentally chided herself. You don't even like girls!

Yue was oblivious to this. "I guess you can do something similar to the one I have back home. You can try adding something new, though. I've had basically the same hairstyle for my entire life." Yue made room for Katara to sit behind her.

Katara got herself comfortable, then began her work. She decided to keep it relatively simple. The front section braided like back home except shorter and stouter, another section put in twin braids that Katara put into a ponytail with the rest. Pretty good if she said so herself.

Yue pulled out a mirror from beside her. "Thank you, it looks beautiful," Yue said, giving Katara a hug in appreciation. Katara blushed.

"Thanks," Katara said, being modest. "It's not too impressive." The blush was still not off her face despite Yue not hugging her anymore. Her defence that she 'wasn't attracted to girls' was quickly becoming weaker.

"Still, thank you."

-

"Katara," Yue said. "C'mon, it'll be fun."

Katara sighed. "They're just being run into the ground, it hasn't changed over the past week, I don't see why your boyfriend is even helping him, it's pointless." Katara groaned. "I'd rather practice my waterbending with you." She hinted. Stupid half-crush.

Yue sighed. "Well... I think that Zuko feels guilty." Yue said in answer to Katara's question.

Katara screwed her face in confusion. "Guilty?" Of all the things that Zuko could be, guilty wasn't one of them yet. He was too awkward, and honestly, Katara could kick his ass any day. Sure he was the prince of the Fire Nation, but he was also 16. Only a few years older than her, that would be like saying that Sokka was responsible for both Water Tribe's crimes. False, he was responsible for at least two that Katara knew of.

Yue paused. "Well, his father is the one that is starting this rebellion, his ancestors are the ones that started the war and kept it going for so long. Even though he hasn't actually done anything, he thinks that he needs to atone for his people's crimes. Some people think he needs to." Yue explained. Katara frowned.

"But..." She argued weakly. "But can't he see that Fong just wants to turn a literal 12-year-old into a weapon?" It wasn't fair. They were stuck between a rock and a hard place, the rock being Fong of course. Because of his earthbending (see, she was totally funnier than Sokka). Still, Aang was peaceful, he didn't choose to be the Avatar, and he didn't choose to be the last airbender either. Fong was just manipulating his feelings and turning him into a weapon, and those two didn't see it.

Yue was sad. "Yes, but he has his limits. He won't let anything bad happen to Aang." Yue touched her betrothal necklace. Oh. She cared about Zuko as much as she cared about Aang, she didn't want to see either of them hurt.

Katara thought for a moment. That was true, she trusted Zuko enough to leave him with Aang, but she didn't trust Fong, not by a long shot. He was an asshole who only cared about himself. "Fine, but if they haven't made any progress in the next week, then we're leaving whether they like it or not."

Yue smiled, and Katara's heart beat faster against her will. "Deal. Want to practice our waterbending?"

Katara blushed. "Sure".

-

Zuko

Two whole weeks.

They had spent the last two weeks almost nonstop just trying to get Aang to master the Avatar state. They hadn't even succeeded in getting him to go glowy-eyed, much less master it. Frankly, Zuko was getting tired of doing this. Fong wasn't much help, and Zuko was leaning heavily towards Aang's opinion in the matter: he would have to master the elements but use the Avatar state as a fallback method.

"Zuko?" Aang said to him.

"Yeah?"

"I don't think I can do this. The Avatar State... we're already spending a lot of time on this, I need to do it the right way." Aang admitted. Zuko paused. What was he doing? Running a 12-year-old day and night despite nothing happening when there was a tried true and proven method that they were procrastinating on. Eugh, now he felt like a bad person (remember what Uncle said, evaluate your actions, reasoning, and situation. Are you acting rationally?)

"Fine." He turned to Fong's study, where he was surely working. "We'll go there together."

Aang smiled, the first genuine smile in days. "Thanks, hotman!"

"What the fuck did you just call me?"

-

"I can't master the Avatar State," Aang explained. "It only works when I'm in genuine danger, and at this rate, it'll be easier and better for me to master earthbending and firebending than to keep trying to unlock the Avatar State."

Fong stroked his beard. Zuko spoke up. "I agree with the Avatar, this just isn't working."

Fong looked up. "Okay." Zuko heaved a sigh. It was over with. "Men," Fong said and Zuko suddenly realized that something was very, very wrong. "Attack the Avatar and Prince Zuko."

Fuck.

Fong's desk was flung at them, and Zuko broke off into a sprint.

-

Zuko didn't know how long they had been doing this. They kept flinging rocks and earth and these coin-shaped big rocks (why did they even have those-?) his trail of thought broke off as he dodged another blow. Aang was doing some intense gymnastics.

"Give it up, Fong!" Aang yelled as he ducked under a coin-rock-thing. Zuko wasn't having much better luck. At some point, Sokka had shown up and was currently wrangling with an ostrich-horse.

Suddenly everything stopped. All of the coin-rock-things were lined up in a V shape, opening up to Fong, who was-

Oh fuck no.

Yue was struggling against her bonds. Katara was next to her. Fong was standing proud.

"Let them go!" Zuko yelled. Aang was frozen in fear.

"Not until I see the Avatar state!" Fong earthbent both of them lower into the ground.

"Aang, help!" Katara yelled. Aang looked as terrified as Zuko felt.

"We need the Avatar state to win this war!" General Fong yelled. Zuko was too far away to do anything. Yue was sinking lower, Katara was too. Sokka was wrestling with two earthbender soldiers, and Zuko was stuck. He was frozen in place, but thank Agni he had never learned to freeze.

"You are attacking two royals of two nations right now! Not to mention the fucking Avatar! Think about your actions! The war is over!" Zuko screamed. "This isn't worth anything, you're not going to win!" He lifted his hands in a firebending form. "Let them go!"

"I can't do it!" Aang screamed.

"Well, you're to have to!" Fong yelled back.

Ozai's voice carried through the courtyard. "I can't do it!" yelled a small Zuko, desperately trying to perform his kata.

"You're doing to have to." The cruel voice of his father said.

Zuko shook his head. Aang was in distress, the wind was blowing (when had it started blowing?), and Zuko hated to feel so helpless. But Yue was sinking lower, and Katara was yelling out-

-

Aang

Aang was so angry, and he could feel the Avatar State bubbling within him. The wind was blowing harder around him, whipping against his robes. "I don't see glowing!" Katara was sinking lower and he-

Swish!

A projectile shot past him, pinning itself in General Fong's sleeve to the back wall. General Fong blinked.

"What's up, fuckers?" An unfamiliar voice announced in a flat tone, the knife-thrower continued throwing knives, pinning General Fong's limbs to the wall. Zuko from Aang's side seemed to light up in a grin.

"Mei! That's rude!" Another voice said to the first, presumably Mei. They were jabbing the Earthbending soldiers, making them fall to the ground like sacks of potato-sunroots. "You say it like this, what's up, fuckers!" The second said in a bright, cheery voice. They cartwheeled over in a flash of pink, so quickly that Aang was left with no other thought than to stop and stare in confusion. They poked General Fong in a few places, and he sagged. The earth around Katara and Yue loosened, letting them go free.

Mei(?) took the hilt of their knife and hit Fong on the head, knocking him out. "No one has a problem with that, right?" Aang found that he respected Mei quite a bit more.

Sokka rushed to Yue and Katara. "Are you both okay?"

Katara brushed off her dress. "Yeah, jerk."

Sokka narrowed his eyes at his sister. "Bitch." There was no venom in his voice. Aang didn't quite understand the interaction, but he was happy his friends were okay.

Yue stood up. "Mei! Ty Lee! What are you doing here?"

"Well we heard about my favourite Water Tribe princess and my favourite dumb Fire Prince being in the area, so Fire Lord Iroh sent us over to help you guys!" The pink-clad girl said. "Oh yeah, I'm Ty Lee, she and her, and this is my girlfriend/theyfriend Mei, she and they!"

Mei waved. "Hey."

-

"Aang." A voice spoke to him. Aang blinked. He was inside the rooms, everyone was asleep. He turned around, trying to find the source of the voice. His bed wasn't empty.

His body was still there. He looked at his hands, they were tinted blue. "I'm in the Spirit world?"

"Kind of." He turned around once more.

"Avatar Roku!" Aang smiled. "Why are you here?"

"I need to tell you the truth of the Avatar state." Aang felt his stomach drop, and he was suddenly on a dragon, flying through the air...

-

Mei

So.

This was the Avatar.

"I thought you'd be..." Aang grinned politely. "Older." Mei finished. Ty Lee slung her arm around their shoulder.

"Ignore them, they're not that good at social skills." Ty Lee smiled apologetically. Mei frowned.

"Excuse you, I am the epitome of grace and decorum." They leaned into Ty Lee anyway. Stupid girlfriend being stupidly warm and cozy.

Sokka (who Zuko had explained was Yue and Zuko's boyfriend (how did Zuko get enough charm to get two partners?)), grinned at them. "I didn't know that the Fire Nation also had bigendered people!"

Mei shrugged. "Gender is more of a nah for me. I'm just... me. I don't really see myself as being both a boy and a girl, more like… just not?"

Sokka nodded. "Understandable."

Aang smiled. "Well, we have a term like that back with the Air Nomads too. It doesn't translate too well from the ancient language, but I think the closest term would be agendered. Kind of like me, I'm not really a boy or a girl, I'm just Aang!"

Mei tilted their head. "Oh? What are your pronouns."

"I like them all the same!" Aang explained. The rest of the group seemed a bit surprised to learn this information as well.

Mei was curious. The Avatar was certainly different than they thought. "Cool." They settled on.

Zuko sighed. "Are you guys done? I think we should try to get to Omashu soon."

"We brought a travelling balloon!" Ty Lee stood up. "If anyone wants to come in the travel balloon they're free to come with us!"

Aang was apprehensive. "No thanks." She stood up. "I'll just ride on Appa." Appa roared. "Yep! Just you and me, buddy!"

Just when Mei thought they couldn't be surprised anymore, Sokka grinned. "Did you know I helped invent the balloons?"

"What the fuck."

Notes:

I am unashamedly hating on Pakku. Fuck him.

Title from Glutton by Harbour

Guys, gals, nonbinary pals, I'm not Native American or Indian, I literally got all my information from Wikipedia so if I got anything wrong please tell me so I can fix it.

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