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This really wasn’t how you hoped your day would go. But here you were, sitting on a hospital bed with a nurse shining a torch in your eyes making sure you were okay.
The reason you were here may be funny in the future when you tell it back to your kids or something. But right now, you were worried and so was the man that was holding your hand, who’d been the cause of your injury.
Matty had brought you to A&E as soon as the incident happened.
You’d been friends for 3 years, so it really wasn’t anything out of the ordinary these days when Matty popped by early in the morning. You knew he liked getting out of his house so his inability to sleep for long durations didn’t suffocate him.
After all, no one liked lying in bed wide awake when you knew you were meant to be asleep.
So, you’d given him a key many moons ago to try and help him combat that. You were a creative person, be that crafting or baking or painting.
You had it all.
So, his mind could run wild in your house and he’d yet to get bored. You’d woken up more than once to find him in your lounge, painting once but most of the time you found him trying to replicate your baking goods.
And he was really shit at it.
When he walked into your home this morning, you were already up and in the kitchen baking. Truthfully it was a surprise to see you up and about so early as it was only 6:30.
You didn’t sleep very well last night as you’d been out drinking with a few friends. You never really slept well after an alcohol filled night. It always left you really dehydrated and because you lived quite a bit out of London, not too far from Matty, you most of the time started with your hangover before you even got back home.
But that was the choice you made when you went into the city to drink.
So in theory Matty shouldn’t have been surprised when he saw you already awake this morning. He knew you’d gone out and he knew what drinking did to you.
Matty quite liked when you got drunk with him, you were a really funny person and you pretty much had no filter when you had alcohol in your system. That was always fun for you all when you went out, and Matty loved the taxis back home with you on nights like that.
He always brought an extra drink in the taxi with him so your hangover wouldn’t start in the 30 minute drive back.
Matty had greeted you with a hug when he walked into your house and found that you were in the kitchen. You seemed really happy to see him too and you got to chatting about how Notes was coming along.
But it seemed that you and Matty let time get the better of you as Matty kept teasing you for practically still being drunk. The alcohol that was still present in your system obviously hadn’t worn off it’s truth serum effects yet and Matty liked to tease you about doing impulsive things, like baking cookies at 7:30 in the morning.
The next time Matty looked at the clock though, he was really late for a meeting. Your tired, tipsy, sleep deprived self had been quite entertaining leading him to forget that he had people to meet.
Jamie had called him double checking about the meeting that was meant to be starting at 8:45. But the time was now 9:22 and he still hadn’t showed up so Jamie, being the friendly manager he was, just called him up to check if he was okay.
“Oh fuck.” Matty curses looking at the caller ID and the time.
You look around at Matty worriedly and ask, “What’s wrong?”
“I’m meant to be at a meeting with Jamie and the lads right now.” Matty tells you, “I’ll be just a minute.”
Matty goes out of the kitchen to answer the call as he didn’t want to disturb your early morning baking. He didn’t care if you could hear what he said or not he just didn’t want to disturb your morning.
That and he was going to try and get out of the meeting so he could stay and eat all the cookies you’d yet to put in the oven.
Matty answers Jamie and profusely apologises for lacking manners to show up to a meeting on time. Thankfully, Jamie isn’t that fussed about it and suggests putting the meeting back as he was free until early afternoon.
Matty jumps at that chance.
But then Matty practically whips himself around with the intent to ask you how long it will take to bake the cookies so he’d know how long to push the meeting back, but he never gets that far. When Matty turns around, he barges his shoulder straight into you causing you to be pushed back.
You were just about to make your way past him to get your phone from where you’d put it on charge in your lounge earlier, but that was long forgotten when your head smacked off the corner of the wooden door frame behind you.
The bang to the back of your head shocked Matty to his core. You both stopped dead and looked at each other and as soon as Matty’s hands rested on your shoulders he kept apologising.
“Shit shit shit. Y/N are you okay?!” Matty asks, his hands flying to your shoulders to steady you, his phone still in his hand.
“I’m okay.” You tell him in shock, moving away from the door frame a little to hold the back of your head.
You could feel a lump forming already, but there was no blood, so you guessed you were alright. Matty quickly puts his phone to his ear to tell Jamie he’d call him back before he pockets his phone and holds your shoulders again.
“I’m so sorry Y/N. I didn’t know you were there, are you okay? Did I hurt you?” Matty asks worriedly.
“Not your fault Matty.” You tell him, “I’m fine.”
Something which Matty doesn’t believe for a solid minute despite you assuring him that you were okay.
Once he relaxes a little, he pulls you into a hug as another way to apologise. You also relax and take your hand off the back of your head to hug him back, trying to assure him you’re okay. But you can’t help the curse that falls from your lips as you could already feel a headache coming on.
“Fuck me.” You say resting your forehead down on his shoulder.
His eyes go wide, “Really?” Matty questions in shock.
“No.” You say immediately, and Matty is about to laugh until you correct your statement to, “Well, not right now.”
Matty’s eyes widen, “What?”
You didn’t even say it in a sarcastic or joking way. Matty immediately felt the need to pry.
“My head hurts a little.” You whine into his shoulder, but he assumes it’s to try and distract from the little slip up you just had.
And as much as Matty wanted to make your head better instantly he was shocked by what you said. So before he could stop himself he grins, “Tell me what you just said.”
“Matty I’m fine, go to your meeting.” You say picking your head up off his shoulder.
He looks into your Y/E/C eyes and they narrow as he asks if he hears correctly, “You said I couldn’t fuck you right now?”
“Yeah, so?” You shake your head as if you didn’t remember saying that.
Matty looks at you curiously, frowning a little as the thought had never really crossed his mind that you thought of him like that. “You want me to fuck you?”
“We’re not discussing this right now.” You shake your head again but Matty sees pain flash through your eyes. You hold the back of your head again and he can see you’re actually in pain. “Matty, my head hurts.”
“I’ll get you some ice.” Matty says letting go of your waist and looking to your fridge freezer across the room.
Before he can move though you grab his arm and say, “No, go to your meeting.”
“You can’t just say you want me to fuck you and then tell me to go to a meeting Y/N.” Matty grins at you.
You close your eyes and sigh, “Matty.”
Matty’s grin gets bigger and he holds your waist again and teasingly says your name, “Y/N.”
“You shouldn’t be joking about this now…” You shake your head a little harder, “You just made me accidentally whack my head on the fucking door fra- oh… I feel dizzy.” You say and Matty’s heart goes in his throat when your eyes roll to the back of your head and you almost go limp in his arms.
“Shit.” Matty says, tightening his hold around you so you don’t fall to the floor and hit your head again.
And that was how you ended up in A&E at 9:55 on a Friday morning.
“Okay so, you’re okay but you’ve had a moderate concussion and you’re unfortunately going to be in pain for a day or two with it.” The nurse tells you when she stops shining the torch in your eyes.
“We will give you stronger painkillers than the ones you’ve already taken but with these you need to be woken up every two hours when you go to sleep tonight. Try and stay awake as long as possible today and then,” She looks to Matty, “You need to wake her a little every two hours. Not like getting up and about but she needs to respond or you call an ambulance.”
“Oh he’s n-” You start to correct her to wonder what you need to do for yourself because Matty wouldn’t be with you.
But Matty says, “Yeah course, I can do that.”
After the nurse told you and Matty what symptoms of things getting worse to look out for you picked up your prescription from the chemist. After that though you expected to go back home and try to relax your headache away but Matty refused to let you out of his sight because it was his fault you were in this state.
So Matty took you to his pushed back meeting and took you to the studio afterwards as he had to keep his eye on you. You weren’t chatty throughout it all, as you tried to keep yourself to yourself.
But that didn’t mean that you didn’t find the meeting fucking boring and you felt like you were intruding in the studio. But you did get another insight into their new album which was fun.
You tried to keep your mouth shut whilst you listened to it, liking to take in the lyrics but when you did you were a little shocked about it.
The song you were allowed to listen to today was Nothing Revealed/ Everything Denied and there were a few revelations in there that you weren’t expecting. But you tried to keep that as quiet as you could because the strong painkillers mixed with the lack of sleep was also acting as another form of truth serum.
Since taking your painkillers early this afternoon, you’d been messy to say the least. You’d made a fool out of yourself when you complimented all of the other boys.
Earlier you basically told George that you thought his tattoos were attractive. You told Ross that his hair was looking really good with it longer on top and you even accidentally moved it and styled it a tad for him. You forced yourself to not tell Adam that you found him hypnotic when he played the guitar.
“You have nice eyes” You tell Matty, but not actually meaning to, as you sat across from him at the cafe you’d gone to for lunch not far from the studio.
Matty glances back at you from the window then and he smiles, “Thank you”
He also feels the need to add, “You’ve got nice eyes too”
You seem to become a bit embarrassed then which makes Matty smile. You seem to disagree with his observation though and shake your head which confuses him a little, until you say, “I have boring eyes”
“Mine are literally the colour of this table Y/N” Matty says, pointing to the dark wood that your plates both rest on. “Not very interesting”
“They are interesting. They look like they see the world differently” You say honestly before looking back down to your food.
Matty watches as you eat then. It seemed like you didn’t mean to say that either because you went a bit shy again.
He decides to let this one slide but when you do it again he can’t help himself.
About 3 hours later, Matty was driving you both back home from the studio and he noticed that you were pretty silent in the car despite one of your favourite songs just being on the radio. Matty looks to you after the song finishes and notices your leaning your head on the window.
Your eyes were closed and you looked a bit better than earlier, so he asked you, “How you feeling, love?”
But you didn’t answer him and that makes him panic a little bit. He forgot you weren’t allowed to sleep.
“Hey Y/N/N” Matty says, flicking his eyes between you and the road and he shakes your shoulder.
“I’m tired Matty, leave me alone ” You say shrugging his hand away.
“No no no stay awake” Matty says pulling on your hair a little bit instead to try and annoy you awake.
He does it for a minute and he only stops when you pick your head up off the window. You shift in your seat and turn towards him so you’re now facing him properly and resting your temple on the headrest.
You close your eyes again but you know he’s right, so you ask, “Can you keep chatting to me to keep me awake because I don’t think I can do it on my own.”
“Fuck.” Matty chuckles.
You always told him to shut up. Never to keep talking.
“Have I broken you?” Matty chuckles a little looking back to the road.
“Not in the way I want you to break me.” Matty hears you whisper and his eyes go wide.
He sees that your eyes were closed again but this time you were curled up on the seat facing him. It didn’t even look like you knew what you just said.
He immediately turns his head and asks in shock, “Do you know you said that out loud?”
“I said that out loud?” You ask, your eyes open in shock.
“Yes Y/N.” Matty smirks glancing back at the road and then at you again.
You look mortified and you pull your phone out of your pocket and distract yourself on that. You don’t look at him as you say, “Well pretend I didn’t”
Matty wants answers though. “Y/N do you wa-“
But you interrupt with, “Matty when are you releasing Notes because I wanna play If You’re too Shy on repeat?”
“Y/N/N.” Matty tries again but you have none of it.
“Answer me.” You insist, evidently not wanting to revert back to what you said.
Matty gives in and estimates, “Like May-ish.”
“May?” You question in an annoyed sigh. “Matty you said it would be out last year.”
“Don’t believe what I say music wise.” Matty says looking back to the road now as you definitely weren’t going to go back to the topic of him ‘breaking you’. “I said that we were stopping the band after Notes remember and that’s changed.”
“Yeah, I don’t know why you ever said that. You belong on a stage”. You say as you scroll back through your phone.
“Thanks Darling” Matty grins, “Do you like watching me up on stage?”
He hopes to get another comment out of you like before. But he just gets a sarcastic, “Oh yeah Hun, you look like the drama queen you are.”
You’re good with your slip ups after that until late at night when you head up to bed with Matty following close behind joking about the ‘adult sleepover’ you were having. He’d insisted he was staying and doing the checks on you every two hours.
You were fine with that as he’d stayed in your bed before when the both of you had passed out mid movie nights, but the jokes you could do without. Especially when your lips were speaking so freely from the meds you were on and the lack of sleep in your system.
“You hurt me Matthew, you should be taking care of me not asking me to shag you” You say before heading into your bathroom to get changed after throwing a pair of joggers his way.
When you re-enter your bedroom, you see Matty already under your duvet and you give him a hug once you lie yourself down beside him.
“You’re never this touchy with me” Matty says a minute into the hug that’s practically turned into a cuddle.
“Because I don’t know if you like me touching you.” You say as you let go of him and grab the pillow under your head to bring it between you so you could hug it as you drifted off to sleep.
But you leave Matty confused then. You were never the touchy type in general and in the time he’d known you, he’d never seen you with the boyfriend you had when you initially met so he didn’t even know if you were a cuddly person in a relationship.
“You don’t like anyone touching you.” Matty says after your eyes had been closed for a few seconds.
You don’t open them back up again, not even when you admit, “I like you touching me.”
It makes Matty once again freeze as he wasn’t expecting your honesty. And he certainly wasn’t expecting you to continue with, “Makes my day when you give me a hug or kiss my cheek or give me a loving headlock, even if your hair does tickle my face when you do it.”
You chuckle a little at the end of your sentence which leads Matty to do as well, at both your honesty and the comment about his hair. The way you’re smiling into your pillow is also impossible for Matty now to smile at.
“I love your hair, you know?” You tell him, still keeping your eyes closed.
Matt smiles at the fact your filter seems to be completely gone at this point. So Matty feels the need to compliment you back.
“I love your hair.” Matty tells you, tucking a strand of it that had fallen onto your face behind your ear. He tells you honestly, “I like messing with it”
“Mhhh” You hum with a smile. You add in a whisper, “I like it when you pull on it.”
Matty is once again taken aback by your statement and this time he can’t let it go. The teasing remarks that you’d been accidently letting slip all day had to have meant something, or you wouldn’t look so sheepish after you said them.
Like just now you were cuddling yourself into your pillow more than you already had been and Matty just couldn’t bring himself to let it go. Yeah it may not be the time for such a conversation at 1:48am but here you both were.
And Matty had to know.
So after a silent minute he said, “Y/N”
“What?” You ask softly.
“You know I can hear you whispering?”
“Maybe you were meant to.” You tiredly suggest, your voice barely above a whisper.
“Where’s this all coming from?” Matty asks, a little amused as you never gave out compliments unless it was about his music.
The music was something you never joked about but you always did with him and the rest of the band.
Matty watches as you internally battle with yourself on what to reply. But it seems the truth ends up being your easiest option despite you sighing before you start.
“I think I like you a lot Matty.” You tell him and it shocked the curly haired man to his soul. You carry on, your eyes still closed, “And once I slipped up I couldn’t stop myself from carrying on.”
Matty struggles to find words for a moment there. He didn’t know what he was expecting but it certainly wasn’t this.
“I think about you all the time when I’m not supposed to…” You trail off for a moment there leaving the room in silence. Something which then leads to you add in a sad tone, “And I get it if you leave… I wouldn’t like me either but I’m sick of hiding it now.”
Matty stumbles again but he just about manages to ask, “Ho- How long…? Have you liked me?”
“I think I noticed after George’s party” You say thinking back to three months ago.
“Why?” Matty asks, not remembering anything significantly different about that night compared to the others you’ve shared together.
“Because you’re you” You say simply.
Matty frowns a little then, not annoyed he doesn’t think, but maybe a little disappointed. He didn’t want people to like him because he was Matty Healy from The 1975 anymore.
Matty wanted that left behind in 2015. That’s why he’d had the long relationship with Gabby and that was why he’d only been out with very few people since her, Twigs being the only one that got a little serious. But all of them eventually fizzled out for different reasons.
Matty just didn’t want people to want him because of who he was on stage or who the media presented him as anymore. He was done with it… completely and utterly-
“You always make me laugh by pulling a face when I’ve had a bad day at work.” You carry on after those few seconds of silence, and you continue on to say, “You know my shit and you tease me about it but in a fun loving sorta way. You tuck your hair behind your ear when you’re nervous which is the cutest thing I’ve ever seen and I get jealous when you do it to other girls and not me, but that’s fine. And my heart goes rapid when you tell me a cheesy joke because you decided to tell it me first. And I find myself wanting you to be around all the time even if it’s the middle of the night.”
You finish off your tired rambling leaving Matty on the opposite side of your bed completely stunned. So much so that the man who always has something to say is left speechless.
Nothing coming out of his mouth even if he could think of something to say. You have completely stunned him.
He is so desperately trying to think of a way to reply to you that he doesn’t realise how much time passes. The only thing that rips him out of his thoughts are your next soft words.
“Am I allowed to go to sleep now or do I have to stay awake?” You question in a whisper, your voice thick with tiredness.
Matty looks at your soft stunning features and just about manages to whisper back, “You can sleep… But don’t you want me to tell you how I’m feeling?”
You shake your head into your pillow and Matty listens intently when you say, “I’d rather have ten more minutes of us being friends without it being awkward and then I can wake up tomorrow and cry when you’re not there and don’t want to be my friend anymore.”
And just that sentence alone breaks Matty’s heart. He assures you, “I’m never going to not be your friend”
Because no matter what happened tomorrow he didn’t want to lose you. You’d always been such a good friend, there was no way Matty was ever going to let that go.
“But you’re not going to be close with me anymore because you know I like you.” You say, your voice full of melancholy. But you for some reason feel the need to assure him, “And that’s okay. I wouldn’t like me either… But thank you for being my friend for as long as you have.”
“Y/N” Matty starts but you don’t let him finish.
“Goodnight Matty. Talk in the morning.” You say, “But if you go, I understand. I won’t bother you anymore.”
“I’m n-” Matty tired again but your tired voice interrupts once more.
“Thanks for everything Matty.” You say giving him a smile, your eyes still closed but you must have known he was watching you.
That night Matty didn’t sleep a wink. You were all he could think about. He lay on the other side of your bed for hours trying to process everything you said.
He couldn’t believe it. He was really shocked by your honesty just before you went to sleep but as you spoke he could physically see your body relax. As if it was a weight of your shoulders which he guessed it must have been.
Matty took the hours he lay awake and processed everything about yours and his friendship through his mind. And there were so many happy memories.
Matty didn’t even get through the first year before his 2 hour alarm went off on his apple watch and he stirred you a bit to make sure you were still alive. He of course knew you were but when you hummed a little in response to him calling your name that was enough for Matty to let you rest again.
Matty went over every single thing he could remember in his mind. The highs and the lows of the last 3 years in your presence and he was smiling throughout most of it.
Sometimes his thoughts got away with him so much he had to put the TV you had in your room on to distract him. The volume stayed on low but he had to distract himself because not getting a chance to talk to you left him wanting to wake you up and talk everything through.
But he knew you’d had a shit night’s sleep the previous day and the bump on your head had left you really tired. So he couldn’t deprive you the rest you definitely needed.
But now it was 7:36 and Matty couldn’t just lie in bed next to you anymore. He had to go do something.
~*~*~*~
You woke up the next morning afraid to open your eyes. You were petrified.
Of course you remembered everything that had been said the night before and you knew if you opened your eyes and saw the guy you fancied beside you that your friendship at the very least would be okay. But if you opened your eyes to see an empty bed, you know you fucked it completely.
So that was why you kept your eyes closed for 5 minutes once you woke up. You could hear your TV playing music from the other side of the room so you never heard Matty breathing. But there was a reason for that.
Because when you opened your eyes, you found an empty bed.
Your heart sank and immediately tears came to your eyes. You knew you shouldn’t have done it. You shouldn’t have told him anything.
Now you’d lost your good friend and probably the rest of the band on the way. By the time you sat up and walked into your bathroom, the tears were freely streaming down your face.
You didn’t even try to stop them. You just let them fall and got in the shower so you could cry to your heart’s content.
Your chest hurt. It hurt in a way it hadn’t for a long time because you’d not let anyone in like you’d accidentally let Matty in.
And of course he wasn’t interested in you. Why would he be?
You were no Halsey or Gabby or FKA Twigs. You were no one’s love of their life, but you thought Matty might have been yours.
It was so stupid of you to think like that.
You hoped the 20 minute shower would have been enough time to settle your heartache but apparently it wasn’t. You were still crying long after you turned the water off and you got yourself dry.
You cried as you blow dried your hair, you cried as you changed into your comfort pair of joggers (the ones you’d loaned Matty last night) and your massively baggy hoodie. You couldn’t stop the tears from flowing which meant that the pressure behind your eyes started to hurt your head.
You turned the TV off but that didn’t help. So you went downstairs to get yourself a drink and some painkillers as your injury from yesterday wasn’t helping either.
But when you opened your kitchen door the bang of something hitting the worktop didn’t help either. You push the door open fully and we’re shocked to see your kitchen in an absolute state with Matty standing there in his clothes from yesterday with a tray full of unbaked cookies in his hand.
“What are you doing?” The words come out of your mouth as you look at the state that your kitchen was in.
There’s baking goods everywhere and from the things that were out you couldn’t tell if he was making bread or some sort of cake. You were very confused but your curly haired friend also looked confused.
He didn’t turn to look at you as he was trying to make sure the cookies that were on the tray didn’t roll off as he put them in the oven. He opened up the now very hot contraption and once they were in and the door was shut he quickly put a timer on his phone to check them after a while.
“I’m trying to make you some cookies. But you know yours are always going to be better than mine because the first batch I tried I put icing sugar instead of cast- what’s wrong?” Matty asks, finally turning to look at you.
When he did, he saw that your eyes were swollen and your cheeks were puffy and your eyes were all bloodshot. He threw the oven glove to the side not caring where it went and walked over to you, “Why are you crying?”
You withdraw then and look down away from him. The ball immediately rises back to your throat and the tears that had just briefly stopped are threatening to flow again.
“Y/N/N” Matty takes your hand so you can’t move away again.
You shake your head and look down to the ground. You just about managed to get out, “Doesn’t matter”
“Course it matters, you’re upset” Matty says but you just shake your head and don’t look at him.
But that doesn’t mean he can see the tears rolling down your cheeks.
“Come here” He says, pulling you into a hug and you truly didn’t realise how much you needed it.
You inhale a very shaky breath which hurts Matty’s heart so he asks again, running a hand up and down your back, “What’s wrong? Why are you upset?”
You don’t have the energy to make up a lie so you just tell him the truth.
“You weren’t there when I woke up. I thought I lost you” You whisper but your voice comes out in a much higher octave than usual as you’re trying not to fully sob again.
Matty pulls away from the hug but keeps you close. Both his hands come up to cup your face and his thumbs brush away your tears and he says softly, “Don’t cry”
“Matty I’ve been crying for the better part of an hour, you telling me to stop won’t just make it happen” You half laugh half whine.
Your emotions were everywhere. You couldn’t believe he was still here. You still weren’t to be fair, you were half sure you were dreaming.
“You really think I would just leave you?” Matty asks with a tiny frown as he again wipes another tear away.
“Well yeah.” You shrug a little pathetically before carrying on in a pained voice, ”You don’t owe me anything. I’m just some girl you know. I’m not one important, so why would you stay?”
“Because you’re so much more than that you’ve just said.” Matty tells you honestly. His heart hurting that you thought of yourself like that.
“You don’t have to pretend.” You shake your head, ”I’m a big girl, I can handle rejection.”
Matty can’t believe you don’t get it.
“Y/N/N I’m standing in your house trying to bake you cookies, comforting you, I always flirt with you and I have done for ages… And you still think I want someone else?” Matty asks, wiping your tears away.
”No.“ Matty confirms, ”Yeah, you shocked me last night because you’ve never ever given me the slightest inkling that you liked me but when you started, it all fits Y/N.”
Matty continues to shock you with, “Why do you think I said ‘really’ yesterday when you said ‘fuck me’? I didn’t mean to say that just like you didn’t mean to say ‘not right now’.”
Matty grins as he finishes explaining, “But your you. You never let me get a word in edgeways which most of the time I love, but yesterday you didn’t let me get a chance to say that I fancy the fuck out of you.”
Your eyes go wide and you immediately shake your head, “No you don’t”
“Believe me I do.” Matty assures you, but you still don’t look like you believe him, “I don’t think you understand just how much though.”
“Because you don’t fancy me Matty. Stop trying to be nice” You shake your head and go to turn around but Mattys hand finds your hip and stops you turning.
Matty tells you honestly, “I’d say I’ve fancied you since we were out at that bar months ago and The Sound came on and you were dancing to it singing it to us.”
Matty grins as he continues, “And you did that thing I do on stage for the playing with yourself lyrics and I fully gulped. And then you pulled me up to dance with you and I loved listening and watching you sing my song at me.”
“A little narcissistic of you that Matty” You can’t help but say as you wipe away the tears that had sneaked down your eyes.
“Well it’s lucky you like me anyway so I don’t even have to pretend it’s not.” Matty grins tucking a strand of your messy bed hair behind your ear. “Plus you looked really fucking good in those leather pants and you had the cutest most excited look on your face when you got me up dancing”
You giggle a little then and you half smile at him trying to make the tears stop. Matty helps with that by gently brushing his thumb over the bow sensitive skin under your eyes.
“So my beautiful and wonderful Y/N…” Matty likes the way you smile when he says that, “You need to stop crying because today I planned on wooing my best friend with cookies in exchange for a kiss and later on I was gunna get on my knees and beg my best friend to go out with me.”
You grin as you joke, “George is a lucky boy, isn’t he?”
“Shut up” Matty giggles.
You whisper a little, with a grin on your face, “Especially lucky for the get on your knees part.”
He gives you a knowing look then, but he just grins and asks, “How’s the head injury? Still making you spill your secrets I see”
You smile a little but only answer his question, “My head hurts from crying so it’s not a lot better.”
“Please stop crying.” Matty begs, ”I’d never leave you especially after that. I’m sorry I didn’t stay in bed, I just wanted to do something for you because you never got to finish making the cookies yesterday”
“You’re cute” You smile.
Matty mirrors it, “So are you.”
You smile at him and your eyes flick between both of his. He looked so gorgeous, yet so sleep deprived.
You’re about to ask him about his sleep but Matty gets a question in there before you. “Can I kiss you now?”
Your eyes go wide, “No.”
“I feel vile, I’m all disgusting” You add sniffling a bit because you were all bunged up.
“Y/N you know how disgusting I am, do you really think I care?” Matty chuckles a little, again wiping away a stray tier.
You look into those gorgeous eyes and tell him, “I care”
Matty just pouts, looking down to your lips, “I wanna kiss you.”
You smile at his eagerness but softly plead, “Please wait until I’ve stopped crying.”
“Fine.” Matty says, “You win this one” and then he kisses your forehead.
You smile at the contact and Matty pulls you into a hug which you greatly appreciate. You tightly hug him back and you sort of melt into his warm body.
You feel another kiss being placed to the top of your head and you smile feeling that. “Come on Darling, gotta give you more of that truth serum” Matty says, knowing you needed more painkillers.
You giggle then but you pause when you recognise a familiar smell. You pull out of the hug and say, “Matty the cookies”
Matty immediately smelled the burning batch then too. He rushed his way over to your oven then saying, “Shit shit shit”
~*~*~*~
After the burnt cookies made it out of the oven and you helped him with a normal batch, you spent the day together. Him still looking after you like he did yesterday but this time he was overtly flirting with you all day.
You had to admit that you did love it. The fact he actually liked you back was something you were still a little shocked by but by the time you were sitting down eating your lunch together you’d talked through things a lot.
Matty had told you that he wanted to take you out later to a bar for some quiet drinks, and he said he had every intention of kissing you when he brought you back. You tried not to show how that made you feel bit Matty knew how you hid things so when he cupped your cheeks and felt how hot they were he teased you about being silently on board with the idea.
But the more you thought about actually going out with him, the more you wished it didn’t happen whilst you had a head injury. The last thing you wanted was to go out to a bar and have noisy people around you.
Matty himself was a handful sometimes and if you were honest you didn’t really want to get yourself ready to go out in public. You’d rather just stay in with the man himself.
So you thought you’d ask if he’d put a pin in the idea for now.
“Matty” You say once you come back into the lounge. As you sit yourself down on the settee beside him you ask, “You know how you said you’d get on your knees and ask me out later?”
Matty gives you a little playful grin then and answers, “Yeah?”
“Can you do that maybe in a day or two?” You ask him a little hesitantly. You also explain, “I still don’t feel all that great and I’d like to enjoy our date when we go out.”
“Thought you’d like me on my knees for you?” Matty teases a bit, shuffling himself a little closer to you.
You’re both facing each other on the settee now. The side of your heads are resting against the back of the cushioned surface and you’re just smirking at each other.
You run your tongue over your bottom lip as his playful look continues. Despite the teasing remark though, you continue with your honesty.
“I’d probably love it a lot more when I don’t have a splitting headache and I’ve not been crying all morning.” You grin and Matty chuckles a little before resting a hand on your knee.
“That’s fine” Matty smiles, letting his hand rub your knee soothingly. “What would you like to do instead?”
You quite liked that he didn’t want to leave despite you postponing the date. It gave you more assurance that he was still interested, even though he’d assured you several times now that he was.
You suggest, “Netflix?”
“And chill?” Matty suggests with a teasing smirk.
You can’t help but laugh, “We will see.”
The rest of the day surprisingly goes pretty fast. That may have been yours and Matty’s weird thing around each other though because whenever you were together it seemed like time just flew by.
You both went on a walk around the park near where you lived as a way to break up the day. It was a walk filled with Matty now being very cheeky with you and he found every excuse to put his hands on you.
The most memorable time being when you were standing in the queue at the little cafe that was there so you could get yourselves a sandwich. His arms had snaked around your waist from behind and he pulled you into him for everyone to see.
His touchiness didn’t even die down when you got to the lady who was serving. If anything he was even more attentive to you as he called you ‘Darling’ and ‘Babe’ when he was asking what food and drink you wanted.
The lady serving you seemed amused by your first ‘lovers quarrel’ over who was paying for what. Something which Matty ended up doing because he wasn’t taking no for an answer. You’d be sure to buy him something at some point to make up for it though.
But before either of you knew it you were curled up together on your settee with the lights on low as you watched your films. They weren’t anything intense, they were just shitty comedies like Zoolander and Step Brothers. Just films that you could chat over but then also pay attention to if you wanted a break from the chatting.
You don’t really know how you got into the position but in this moment in time you were curled up against Matty with your legs over his and he had his head on your shoulder as you watched the film. It was needless to say you felt so much better than you did this morning.
Maybe you should have been honest from the get go and you could have been experiencing this for a lot longer. You certainly looked forward to the cute innocent cuddles you’d have in the future as Matty had made it clear he was interested.
You must have got lost in your head for a moment though, because Matty’s lips gently meeting your neck was something that brought you straight back to reality. It was just a gentle peck which made you smile towards the TV and you just carried on playing with his hair like he’d not done anything.
But then he did it again for a little longer and then again a little bit higher up your neck. It was only when Matty carried on his little adventure that your fingers laced into his hair to encourage him.
You felt him grin into your neck then and he slowly worked his way up your neck like a teenager exploring that section of skin for the first time. You of course tilted your head to the side to give him more room and you both had a little giggle at that both being fully aware of what the other was doing.
When Matty started nipping on your neck you let your eyes close to bask in the sensations he was bringing to you. You felt like it was ten times better than what anyone else had done before, but maybe that was because you really fancied him.
Whatever the reason though, you didn’t want his lips to stop. And thankfully they didn’t.
Matty teased your neck until he was itching to kiss your lips. So much so that he silently pleaded to himself that you’d let him now your tears had long dried up.
“Can I please kiss you properly now?” Matty asks against your neck after another minute of the sweet torture.
You pull on his hair so his lips detached from your neck and when he looked up at you and his sweet brown eyes met yours. You nodded a, “Yes please”
And Matty didn’t need to be told twice.
Matty’s pillowy lips meet yours and you instantly melt. The nervousness that you felt building before every first kiss you’d ever had was gone and you let yourself enjoy it.
For Matty it was everything he hoped it would be. Your soft lips meeting for kisses every single time and when you brought your hand up to cup his face it was indication that you liked it enough for it to continue.
Your lips moved against each other’s almost cautiously as you both softly go in for the kisses you’d been starving yourselves of all day. Even though they were sweet and innocent, you couldn’t help your heart beating erratically in your chest.
You think it meant more to you because you liked him and have done for a while. Kisses like this weren’t the same as the ones you get when you were after a quick pull at a club. These meant something and the fact you were both gentle and almost hesitant with them proved that.
After a minute you both pull away, Matty pressing his forehead against yours so you could feel his curls tickle your face but you didn’t mind in the slightest. Your hands had chosen to cup his cheek and his neck so you really weren’t that fussed about his curls, if anything you welcomed them now you knew he didn’t mind you being close.
In this pause to catch your breaths you never really lost, Matty decided to tell you with a grin, “You’ll be pleased to know I definitely like you”
You giggle at that and let your fingers lace back into his curls before saying, “You’re a cheesy fucker” before you pull him in to meet your lips again.
It was less hesitant from both of you this time as the joke caused you both to smile into it a little. But it gets a little more forward after that.
They were more confident kisses this time which was slowly setting your skin on fire. And you both got that into them that the next time you knew what was going on you were leaning backwards with Matty’s lips still meeting yours meaning he was slowly trapping you between him and the settee.
Thankfully there were definitely worse places to be trapped. You would choose this form of imprisonment every time.
When Matty deepened the kiss it caused the both of you to whimper a bit. Mostly because of the way you pulled on his curls to encourage it and the fact that Matty’s hand had found your hip and he held you against him tightly.
The kisses only got braver from then on. Both of you now fully getting off on your settee with absolutely no intention of stopping anytime soon.
The only time you pause is when it’s getting a little intense for you because the lump on the back of your head was pressed into the harder part of the arm of the settee. So the next time Matty’s lips trail down your neck to allow you both to get some air, you let him know in your own sarcastic way.
“Matty” You half whine, loving the way he was kissing your neck now.
“Yes baby?” Matty asks and the pet name causes your stomach to flip. Hearing that fall from his lips in the position you were both in definitely felt good.
“I know I’m a good kisser and everything so it’s not a shock I’m clouding your mind, but I had a head injury yesterday and you kissing me the way you are is pushing my head into the settee and it’s starting to hurt again.” You ramble honestly keeping your fingers tightly laced into his curls.
Matty chuckles into your neck then before placing one last kiss there for now. He then leans up and pecks your lips once more.
“Sorry baby” Matty says, pulling you up into a different position. You’re straddling his hips then and Matty leans back against the settee with a grin plastered onto his lips, “This better for you?”
“Cocky little shit, aren’t you?” You laugh shaking your head at him.
Matty laughs too but he backchats, “Says you… You’re the one that just said your kisses were that good they left me with no memory”
“Well” You grin, pecking his lips teasingly once more before saying, “I’m speaking from experience”
“Come here” Matty says shaking his head, pulling you back down to him with the hand that cups your neck and you note a playful grin on his lips, “We will see whos mind goes foggy”
You end up kissing him like that for a long while just enjoying this new dynamic with each other. You had to admit to yourself that he was a really good kisser, but that shouldn’t really have surprised you, his tongue was out a lot in the Love Me video and he had it out half the time when he teased the crowd when he was on stage.
He definitely knew how to use it.
After the both of you calmed yourselves down, you cuddled yourselves up against each other much like earlier on as you carried on watching another shitty comedy. You watched them into the night again and you only noticed you half dozed off when you felt a soft kiss being pressed to your neck again.
“Matty” You murmur after feeling another lone tired kiss against the skin on your neck.
He must pick up on what you’re about to suggest because he asks, “Can I stay again?”
You nod and say, “Course”
You wanted to kiss and cuddle him for a lot longer than you already had been doing.
“Let’s go to bed, love” Matty says, picking his head up out of your neck and pecks your lips once more.
It leaves a warm feeling in your chest as you turn everything off downstairs before heading to bed.
When you get up to your room Matty’s arm travels around your waist and he hugs you into him. You lean back against him and smile at the feeling of his curls against your skin as he nuzzles himself into your neck again.
“You smell really good” He tells you before placing a kiss to the place where your neck meets your shoulder.
You grin at that, “Thanks, I think it’s just you though. All I can smell is your aftershave”
“Don’t feed the narcissism Darling” Matty spins you around then, “Take the compliment.”
You giggle before you kiss him again, this time with no hesitation at all. Your fingers lace into his curly locks and you pull on it hungrily to keep him close as he continues to walk you back into your bedroom.
They are just playful kisses coming from the both of you. Nothing too intense at all.
You like the feeling of Matty’s arms wrapped around your lower back pulling you into his body. You like the fact that he wanted you close, because you wanted him just the same.
You both pull away giggling a little when Matty almost trips the both of you over from moving towards your bed a little too fast. But thankfully it just ends in a playful, “Need to slow down. I’d feel bad if I gave you another concussion”
“I get it… I’ve wanted to kiss you for ages
“Well you can kiss me whenever you want” Matty grins pulling you down to straddle his lap which you do.
“Good to know” You giggle before kissing his pillowy lips again.
After a few more kisses, you’re both very aware of the tiredness creeping its way into your systems despite the new sensations you’re both getting from your lips attacking the others.
“Y/N/N, Darling, you’ve got my joggers on” Matty grins knowing that they are what you gave him to wear last night.
You grin, “You’re right” and then you get up off his lap and grab yourself some new pyjamas from your drawer.
“I can only apologise mister Healy” You say with a smirk as you push them down your legs and step out of them.
Matty wasn’t exactly expecting you to strip in front of him tonight but the fact your gorgeous legs were on display to him for a minute he didn’t stop himself from looking. Your very oversized hoodie now acts as a dress as it hides your underwear from his gaze.
Matty just couldn’t take his eyes away from your legs though. He didn’t think he’d ever seen you in a skirt or a dress so actually seeing you in front of him like that just led to new thoughts circling his mind. Or his mind was until you hastily picked them up and launched the scrunched up joggers at his head.
“Ey” Matty called back playfully, holding the joggers in his hands now.
You point to your eyes and silently tell him that is where they are with a knowing grin on your lips. Matty can only press his lips together as an apology before you head to your bathroom to change again like you did the night before.
He didn’t need to get everything on the first day.
After changing and doing your nightly routine you come back to your bedroom to find Matty changed into your joggers and no top like last night and you don’t shy your eyes away from his tattoos this time when he walks past you to use the bathroom himself. Matty catches you looking but he doesn’t comment on it and at this point you don’t really care.
When he gets in bed beside you and he pulls you in to cuddle him you bring him out of his thoughts, “Can I ask you a personal question?”
“Course” Matty says, not having anything to hide from you. Especially if you were going to work out in the end, and he had every intention of you both working out.
“Do you really not try? Because I always thought you would be the opposite” You ask him curiously, more truths spilling from your lips thanks to your meds.
Matty asks curiously, “Not try what?” brushing your hair behind your ear so he could see your cute face.
But pout, a little embarrassed, “Don’t make me say it.”
“I genuinely don’t know what you’re talking about.” Matty chuckles, looking at how shy you’d all of a sudden become.
“In your song yesterday.” You say and it brings Matty a bit more clarity on what you were asking, “You said you lied and you’d never fucked in a car”
Matty grins knowing exactly what you were asking now, but he teases, “So what’s your question?”
“You know my question, why are you making me say it?” You chuckle, getting more flustered with each passing second.
Matty leans down and pecks your lips once before he tells you, “Because you’re cute when you get embarrassed.”
You sigh and whine into his neck, needing to hide when you ask, “Do you actually just lie down and not try?”
“See” Matty chuckles, “Wasn’t that hard to say, was it?”
“Just answer my question.” You whine embarrassed that your stupid fucking meds just let you ask anything under the sun.
“Why don’t you just wait and find out?” Matty giggles, pulling your out of his neck a little bit.
He found it very cute that that was the only thing you got out of his song when you were drugged up the previous day. At least you’d told him you liked it though.
“Because I’m nervous now. I thought you’d be the opposite.” You say honestly, “And after earlier I’m confused”
“Why are you nervous?” Matty asks looking into your gorgeous Y/E/C eyes, wanting you to feel comfortable with him, “We aren’t doing anything right now.”
“I know.” You say, and then shrug, “Guess you just spoil my fantasies by saying you haven’t fucked in a car.”
“We can fuck in a car if you like?” Matty teasingly offers before leaning in to kiss you again. He mumbles against your lips, “It won’t be a fantasy then.”
You giggle at that but don’t hesitate to kiss him back. When he pulls away you keep him close and as your nose brushes against his, you suggest, “One step at a time, ey?”
Matty loves the little eskimo kiss you’re giving him enough to carry it on for a few more seconds after he nods in response to your suggestion. God you were so cute, he was very lucky that you liked him.
“Can I keep you on these drugs?” Matty questions, “They make you very truthful.”
You roll your eyes when he says, “Quite like you complimenting me and asking me questions you wouldn’t usually. It feeds the ego more.”
You giggle at that.
“Don’t really have much to hide from you anymore.” You tell him truthfully.
Matty wants a little confirmation, surprised by you saying that, “No?”
“Nope” You grin.
“I’m quite glad you like me Darling” Matty says, tucking a loose piece of hair behind your ear.
“I’m glad you like me back Hun” You grin and kiss him again.
The sweet kiss lasts for a couple of seconds before Matty pulls away so you’re both cuddled against each other again now. You definitely liked being close to him and you were glad he was the cuddly type.
But then he makes a joke that makes you playfully smack his chest as you giggle. Of course, your Matty jokes, “Can’t wait to tell our kids you asked me to fuck you and then fainted”
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~