Work Text:
Tweek swears that if one more person asks him a question, any question at all, he is going to shoot himself.
After a whopping 9 hours, his shift is almost over. He hates the holidays more than anything on this god forsaken planet. He cannot wait for the clock to switch to 10 pm so he can close up the shop. His entire day has been filled with middle-aged women asking him various questions about crystals, essential oils, and incense. He normally doesn’t mind explaining these things, but explaining these things to women who clearly are only asking to succeed their children’s Christmas lists pisses him off.
One can argue that it’s bias that empowers this rage. The only thing his parents ever give Tweek for Christmas is their new brew of coffee, or a mug that reads, Tweak Bros. on it. His mother definitely would not have ventured out to some metaphysical shop to inquire about his interests. No, why would they do that? All his interests should be and will be coffee, coffee, coffee.
So, maybe he is slightly jealous, but that’s beside the point.
The middle-aged women are just annoying. Tweek can tell they do not believe or understand why on earth their children would be interested in healing rocks or chakras. He was asked by one woman today if owning these healing crystals somehow links her daughter to occult magic and satanism. Tweek half wanted to fuck with her and say yes, but then he thought about her son or daughter. They probably suffer enough under someone who would ask such a ridiculous question.
It’s just frustrating is all. He enjoys talking about this stuff with people who get it, and is just so entirely tired of explaining it to people are just clueless and judgmental —
His thoughts are cut short by the ringing bell of the shop.
The shop slowed down and for a minute, Tweek thought maybe he would undergo some kind of blessing and not see another customer for the rest of the night.
However, the sight in front of him is another kind of blessing of its — his own.
He cannot take his eyes away. The man is just so fucking breathtakingly handsome; from his graciously parted raven locks to his almost annoyingly perfect thick eyebrows to the dark stubble that he just wants to graze his fingers against. He does not think he’s ever been so in awe of any single person ever before. He certainly has never wanted a customer to interact with him this badly. He fears he is drooling, but he is very determined.
“Hi, can I help you with anything today?”
When he turns his head to him, locking him in the eyes with wide hazels, Tweek is more than surprised his heart still somehow continues to beat. His profile was already attractive enough, but head-on? Jesus Christ. Life is unfair. He’s never been so torn between wanting to look like someone, and wanting to fuck them.
“Oh,” the man says, “um, no… I’m good.”
It’s in this moment that Tweek notices his fucking right ear is pierced — the known gay side. In this moment, if this goes well, he thinks maybe he’s reached Nirvana because holy fucking shit this guy is hot.
He is so hot that Tweek only now registers what he said. He doesn’t want help. Well, that just won’t fucking do.
“Man, I was wishing you’d say yes…,” Tweek watches as the man wanders mindlessly over by the crystals. Beyond his beauty, he does wear a very puzzled expression. Tweek wonders if he is a newbie, or just another one of countless Christmas shoppers. Although, he is much more tolerable than the middle-aged women before. He has only spoken a couple words to him and he already decides this.
The male shifts his gaze over to him for just a mere second, before looking away. “Uh,” he scratches his chin, starting cluelessly at a shelf full of rose quarts. “What’s this do?” he points to it. Tweek watches as the man picks up the a rose quartz crystal, examining it.
“It’s a crystal of unconditional love and the heart; it usually carries a feminine energy of compassion and peace.”
The man sets it back on the shelf with a frown. “So, it would be bad to get for an acquaintance then?” he shifts his head again to look at him, this time staring for longer than a millisecond.
“I mean… It might bring you two closer?”
The male looks repulsed by this suggestion, shaking his head, and looking back to the shelves of crystals. He takes a step forward to the opal. “Yeah, I’m not really looking to do that...” the stranger’s voice trails as he examines the new shelf.
“Well, what are you looking to do?”
He hears an inhale from the stranger. He turns to face him and shoves his hands into his pockets. “Find them a sufficient enough gift that people can’t give me shit for it.”
The corner of Tweek’s mouth twitches up, “fair enough… well, what do they like?”
The stranger shrugs a shoulder and once again scratches the stubble against his chin. “Uh, honestly… I don’t know. This kind of stuff? I wasn’t expecting this shop to have so much selection.”
Tweek holds back his comment that the shop is hardly bigger than a cubby hole. “There is a lot to this stuff.”
“Yeah,” the other male nods, his eyes dancing around the room, “you don’t say.”
Tweek laughs, “you’re cute. Don’t worry. It can be a little much to people who aren’t around this stuff often — it probably just looks like a bunch of mumbo jumbo to you.”
Tweek notices the slight blush brushed across the male’s cheeks and perfect, long nose. He smiles to himself, satisfied with his light flirting. He figures this is a good enough indication as any to move forward with it.
“Uh, yeah,” the dark-haired man nods his head and takes a step closer to the register. “It is. What would you suggest?”
“What’s your price range?”
“We are supposed to spend 25… it’s for this secret Santa thing…”
Tweek nods, and mumbles “fun” as he steps from behind the counter. He walks over to the shelves to the side of the counter, and Craig follows without being told, meeting him by said shelf.
“Not exactly,” the male says, “I already struggle with picking gifts for the people I’m close to, let alone … some rando.”
Tweek lets out a chuckle at this, “well, lucky for you, you don’t have to pick out anything,” Tweek says as he reaches forward and picks up a tarot deck. He hands it to the stranger with a smile, “this is also probably the best customer service I’ve given all day, just to let you know.”
The stranger grins and takes the box from him. As the stranger grins at him with lit up eyes and a seemingly genuine smile, Tweek thinks he may actually stand a chance.
“Oh, yeah?” The stranger prompts. “I’ll have to leave you a good review on yelp or something.”
Tweek is not positive but he thinks the male is flirting back with him, just in a very awkward and stringed way. Tweek smirks at him before he trails back behind the counter, “well, my name is Tweek so you know who to mention — I would also accept cute blonde, but whichever you prefer,” he shrugs a shoulder, watching him with a sparkle in his eyes.
He watches the dark haired male’s cheeks and nose coat with blush again. He dips his chin down into his chest as he walks in front of the counter, “well, just so you know who to look for, my name is Craig,” he sets the tarot deck onto the counter.
Tweek glances down at it, shocked that this stranger is buying this item without any question just because Tweek suggested it. He expected at least one question about it. “I’ll definitely be looking out for it,” Tweek smirks at him. “But just to do my job a little further, do you have any questions about this?” Tweek places his palm on the tarot deck.
Craig shrugs, “not really.”
“Not really?”
“Should I?” He laughs.
“Do you know what they are?”
“Tarot cards.”
Tweek scoffs out a laugh. “Beyond that?” He asks.
“I’m not entirely clueless… you like… read your fortune or something, right?”
Tweek bursts into laughter at this.
“What? Is that wrong?” Craig asks, an amused smile placed out on his face.
“Not entirely…” Tweek says, “but it’s more of a spiritual guide than anything, like most things in this store.”
“Oh,” Craig nods, “well, as long as you say it’s a good gift.”
“It’s a great one. A lot of people think its bad luck to buy your own tarot deck, so they’re always a really good choice for a gift.”
Craig nods, “do you think it’s bad luck?”
“I mean I definitely am not going to fuck with anything that could be potential bad luck — I have enough of that on my own.”
“Isn’t there like… a crystal for that or something?”
Tweek chuckles again. This guy is hot, gay, and personable? It’s too good to be true.
Tweek nods with confirmation. “Yup, there’s a couple, Citrine is one of them.”
“Hmm,” Craig nods, he glances back at the crystal selection behind him, “and you sell that here?”
“Yeah — it’s right by the Quartz.”
“Okay… uh, ring me up for this,” he pats the box of cards, “I’ll be right back.”
Tweek twists his eyebrows together as he watches the man walk away to look at the Citrine. He rings up the tarot deck, and a moment later, the male comes back with a small Citrine crystal. He sets it on the counter and says, “I’ll get this too, but you keep it.”
Tweek raises his eyebrows at the gesture. “Oh … wow, thanks, are you sure?”
“Yeah… you were really helpful, so I figure I do something back… in the spirit of Christmas and everything.”
The corners of Tweek’s lip tug upward. “Well, in the spirit of Christmas, and because one of these things is for myself, I’ll give you the employee discount — 10% off your total purchase.”
Craig thanks him with another big, perfect grin that makes his knees wobble. He is not letting this man get away. Craig hands him his card and he runs it. As he hands the receipt to the gorgeous man in front of him, he says, “You know, if you’re ever interested in learning more about crystals, I can give you my number. I don’t normally extend my customer service past business hours, but you’re pretty cute so I’m willing to make an exception.”
Craig stares at him with a fumbling mouth, but finally says, “Uh, yeah, um…” he swallows. “Sure.”
For someone as devilishly handsome as the man in front of him, he sure is awkward, but Tweek thinks it’s rather cute and humbling.
“Well, here, bring out your phone…” Tweek says.
The dark haired male listens and pulls his phone from his pocket. Tweek begins to list off his number and tells Craig to text him so he has his . Craig does so and Tweek hears his phone chirp inside his pocket. He smiles at the man, feeling absolutely implored about getting this handsome man’s number.
After their exchange of numbers, Craig grabs his bags off the counter, and murmurs a final thank you and goodbye before turning to exit the shop. Tweek holds up a hand to wave goodbye, watching as his definite favorite customer goes through the door.
Perhaps this shift wasn’t that bad afterall.
-
Tweek is in the middle of his daily yoga stretches, when his phone goes off.
Usually he would just ignore it and continue his poses, but he has been anxious to receive a text from the man of his dreams. It’s only been two days, but the man has not left his thoughts since.
He untangles himself from the lotus position and stands up, walking over to the device that made the previous chirp. His heart skips a beat at the notification banner on his iPhone; an immediate smile reaching across his lips.
CRAIG: Hey, It’s Craig from the other day. So… I was thinking about it, and I was just wondering, I noticed there was kind of a large selection of tarot cards on display. Are these one different than the others in any way?
Tweek considers this question and thinks of how apathetic he was in the shop towards the tarot deck. He decides that it is a stupid enough question to believe he is only asking as a reason to talk to him.
TWEEK: I mostly picked it out for you because it’s my favorite deck (: but if you want me to get into the nitty-gritty of it, I’m more than willing to tell you all about it
CRAIG: Oh, okay, that’s cool. It seems like a cool deck… but ya, admittedly, I know almost nothing about any of this stuff... You want to teach me a little bit?
Tweek takes a seat back into lotus position. There is no reason he can’t do yoga and text a cute boy. He switches the song from Knees by Ocean Valley to Chasin’ by Cub Sport before sending his response.
TWEEK: It’d be my pleasure! (: And I really mean that when I say that to you over any other customer ;)
TWEEK: so, basically, the deck you got is a normal one, there is a major arcana and a minor arcana of 4 basic suits. The deck I also gave you also has 78 cards, which is typical, but you can also get a 12-card deck set, instead of 14
CRAIG: I’m not going to lie to you. I don’t know what the hell arcana is. Honestly, I think I’m more confused than before I asked… Not that you’re a bad teacher, or anything, lol, but I think I just may be a bad student. :P
The corner of Tweek’s mouth turns upward. Craig seemed rather overwhelmed in the store. He pictures that puzzlement, again, etched out on his perfectly sculptured face and his lips spread out to a full on grin.
TWEEK: ur not a bad student, no worries (: it’s a lot of info! I just didn’t wanna overboard you all at once
TWEEK: the major arcana represents the big themes going on in your life while the minor shows you what’s happening to you daily, and how it’s affecting you.
CRAIG: Hmm, not sure how much I believe in all this tbh haha, but it would definitely be helpful to understand how stuff is affecting me… I struggle with that sometimes.
TWEEK: haha you seemed pretty skeptical of it all
CRAIG: Oh, haha, did I? I’ve been told I can be pretty hard to read.
TWEEK: it’d be pretty hard to miss
TWEEK: I really couldn’t take my eyes off you since the second you walked through the door
He hopes he is not being too forward. The male seemed pretty awkward about his flirting. Although he did text him… and only after two days. His best friend Kenny told him that it’d probably be three.
CRAIG: Oh, haha, yeah… I kind of felt you staring, I think…
Tweek decides to take it down a notch, unsure with the response.
TWEEK: ya, you looked like a lost puppy
TWEEK: I felt very responsible for helping you
CRAIG : As any great employee would.
TWEEK: I still haven’t seen any yelp reviews :p
CRAIG: haha, I’m working on perfecting it. :p
TWEEK: I will also accept compliments over text ya know ;*
CRAIG: haha, well in that case… you seem like a very cool person, Tweek. (:
TWEEK: So do you Craig (:
The conversation continues, somehow turning into a conversation about the stress of the holidays. Tweek complains of the influx of customers at the shop, Craig complains of the struggle of finding everyone gifts, Tweek complains of the family gatherings the holiday season brings, and Craig agrees with him. Craig says his father’s side of the family is very homophobic, and that he has made a drinking game out of it. Every time one of his extended family members makes an offensive comment, he takes a drink, and ends up being completely obliterated by the end of the night, to his mother’s disliking. Tweek doesn’t fully get into it, as he would probably scare Craig away, but he says his parents are fucking nut jobs.
Their text conversation carries on for a few days, the topics changing, but the butterflies in his stomach remaining.
Tweek is more than ready to extend this text conversation to in-person, and sees his opportunity when Craig says:
CRAIG: I’ve just been so exhausted lately.
Tweek types out a response with a coy smile.
TWEEK: well coffee is a good cure for that, and lucky for you, I know a place (: You free this Friday?
CRAIG: Can’t say no to a cure for exhaustion (: Yes, I’m free, just text me the details.
And just like that, Tweek has a hot date secured for Friday.
_
When Friday rolls around, Tweek is a healthy combination of nervous and excited as he drives to his favorite coffee shop, where he instructed his date to meet him. He hums along to the music emitting from the speaker, attempting to distract himself from the fleeting fear that he will not be as charming in person as he is over text, or Craig will not be as charming, or Craig will flat out not show up . All of these fears are definitely fleeting, however, as the two had been texting back and forth nonstop and chatting with him about anything and everything was effortless. Craig did not even mind the onslaught of voice memos that Tweek occasionally sent, as his fingers often could not keep up with his thoughts (and he had a case of fat thumbs).
On pulling into the small plot of parking designated for the small café, Tweek tucks his plain, white shirt into his high-rise blue jeans, winces as the back of his hand scraps his belt-buckle. He grabs the red and blue windbreaker he tossed into the passenger’s seat in his haste to make the date on time and slung it over his shoulders. He flipped down the mirror to do a quick redo of the loose bun he had pulled his long, blond curls into before sliding out of the vehicle.
The coffee shop he frequents is quaint and locally owned, not unlike the one he had grown up working in, aside from the fact that it was not a front for a meth pedaling operation (that he knows of, at least). Inside is lit with soft white bulbs, providing a soothing ambiance to accompany the constant, quiet swell of classical music. The walls are lined with decorations that appeared to be repurposed from an antique mall, his favorite, however, being the large, burlap sack that had the store’s logo printed onto it. As if the smell of coffee wasn’t pleasant enough, there was also a faint but constant scent of pine lingering in the air. On top of the atmosphere, his good friend is employed part-time and always gives him half-off. He immediately relaxed into the familiar environment, and when he saw that Craig had already arrived.
Craig had claimed the single, floral sofa chair and sits with his leg bouncing up and down. Tweek allows himself a moment to admire the dark haired angel, and how he looks effortlessly incredible in his Joy Division t-shirt layered with a grey long-sleeve, dark wash jeans and beat-up black Nike SBs on his feet. After inhaling a deep breath and finding his confidence, he wanders to the space between Craig and the decorative coffee table and grins. “Hey, stranger.”
Curious hazels dance up to meet Tweek’s undeserving gaze as his face breaks out into a grin. Craig stands, and Tweek does not miss the twice-over he grants him before returning, “Hey, there.”
“I’m glad you managed to survive without the best coffee ever up until this point but be prepared to have your mind blown.” Tweek assures him as they trace up to the counter.
Tweek gives the bell a gentle tap, and a few seconds later a voice calls, “Coming!”
The pair stand awkwardly for a prolonged few moments as the liar kept them waiting. Tweek knit his eyebrows together and asserted, “Kenneth, come out here!”
“Oh, shit!” comes the muffled voice again. Immediately, Kenny surges out from behind the employee-only portion of the kitchen, wearing a lazy smile across his face, half-eaten muffin in his hand. The short blond nods to the couple and speaks from behind a bite of the pastry, “What’s good?”
Tweek shakes his head, laughing lightly, “You’re such a terrible worker. Would you have really finished that muffin and left a customer waiting if you didn’t know it was me?”
“Yessir, I am very high,” Kenny giggles, chewing himself off another chunk. His gaze finds Craig and his grin widens, “Well, hello. Is this the tall glass of Craig I’ve been hearin’ so much about?”
Tweek feels his face flush read at the implication, which he swiftly deflects, “Yeah, this is Craig, and he’s here to have some good ass coffee.”
“Came to the wrong place, guy,” Kenny sighs teasingly and traces over to the handwashing sink.
Tweek addresses Craig with a sweet grin, “Sorry, that’s my friend, Kenny. He’s a bit of a disaster.”
Craig chuckles lightly, “I can’t say he’s the only one in this room who’s been high at work.”
The blond gasps mockingly, “Oh, you naughty boy!”
The pair puff out laughs together, both knowing full well Tweek hardly got through a shift without smoking a bowl first. Kenny interrupts the tittering as he dries off his hands, “What can I do ya for?”
“You already know,” Tweek assures him, hoping Craig doesn’t find his lusty side-staring unsavory as he considers the chalk-board menu overhead.
Kenny winks, “I gotchu, gorgeous.”
Craig’s stare quickly darts to Kenny as he bustles over to prepare Tweek’s beverage. The slight downward crease of his eyebrows makes Tweek"s heart swell—was that jealousy ? He cannot hold back his smile as Kenny continues, “Just shout it out to me when you figure it out, Mr. Craig.”
Craig clears his throat and recites his order, “Uh—can I do a Mocha Frappuccino?”
“Sure can,” Kenny says as he hands Tweek his styrofoam to-go cup with a Starlight mint placed atop the lid. He waggles his eyebrows at his friend before turning to concoct Craig’s slightly more complicated beverage.
“I thought we were getting coffee, not dessert.” Tweek teases.
When Craig peers down at him his heart flutters, and he’s suddenly very aware of their height difference, though not very significant. He expounds, “To be honest with you, I don’t think I have had a non-dessert coffee since… Ever.”
The blond lets his jaw drop, only half-kidding this time. “That’s unacceptable, man. You gotta try this, it’s the best blend of coffee I’ve ever had.”
Tweek watches intently as Craig accepts the steaming cup and purses his lip against the lid, blowing a few times before imbibing a careful sip. His face rearranges in a way that clearly says I am a dessert coffee drinker , but his lips say, “Oh, that’s pretty good.”
Tweek snorts before taking a swig for himself, “You’re a really bad liar.”
“Alrighty, sirs,” Kenny announces as he returns for the second time, placing a clear-plastic cup with a bubble lid in front of Craig. “that’ll be on the house today.”
“Ken,” Tweek sighs, perking his head down at him, “you’re gonna get in trouble!”
Kenny waves his head, “Nah, I’ll ring it up as my employee meal. I’m workin’ the whole night, so they owe me. Plus—gotta support my fellow queers.”
“Well, okay… Thank you,” Tweek tells him with a grin, slipping a five dollar bill into the tin tip jar before the register. “Text me later, okay?”
Kenny makes praying hands, bowing at the pair, “Namaste, babe.”
Craig shadows him to the bar-style wooden table arranged before the glass window of the establishment. They sit side-by-side on black barstools and set their coffees down, sipping quietly for a moment before Craig asks, “So, is that Kenny guy, uh… Into you?”
Tweek tries his hardest to hold back the howl of laughter that boils in his chest, but it comes out as a muted chuckle anyway. Composing himself, he says, “No, no, we’re just really good friends.”
“Oh, cool.” Craig replies, seemingly relaxing.
Tweek smiles. “Besides, he’s in love and all that… so yeah. I’m the super single one.”
Craig grins back, taking a long sip of his frozen coffee. An awkward moment of silence passes as they drink, and he notices Tweek tapping his fingers against his cardboard cup in time with the symphony recording playing through the cafe’s speakers. He inquires, “You like classical music?”
Tweek ceases his movements when they are detected and grins sheepishly, “Yeah, I guess so. I had a hard time focusing in school and what not and if I listened to classical it helped block everything out but I wouldn’t get distracted by, like… words and want to sing instead of doing work.”
Recalling Tweek’s brief mention of his ADHD over text, Craig nodded in understanding. “That makes sense. I cannot study and listen to music at the same time.”
“Really?” The blond questions, propping his elbows up on the table before them.
Craig says, “Yeah, I guess it’s the same reason as you. The words distract me. Not that I’m much of a singer.”
“Oh, c’mon, everyone’s a singer.” Tweek teases from behind his nearly half-gone cup of coffee.
Quirking an eyebrow to him, Craig inquires, “Including yourself?”
“Of course,” Tweek says, and used his fingers to count, “I’m a shower singer, a car singer, a closing-by-myself singer. All sorts of singing coming from me.”
The dark-haired man chuckles at this, shaking his head. “I promise I can’t relate. Not even nobody wants to hear me sing.”
Tweek bites a lip to subdue his intrusive smile. He does not want to come off too strong but he is unable to contain the giddy feeling rising in him at how natural conversation between the pair felt in person as well as online. Even with the additional intimidation of Craig’s attractive face in front of him and beautiful hazels occasionally tracking his movements, a large part of him felt genuinely relaxed in the other man’s calming presence.
“Well, if you were a singer, what kind of stuff do you think you’d sing?” Tweek asks.
Craig gives his shoulders a slight shrug, “I don’t know. I like all types of music.” When Tweek scoffs in disbelief at his statement, he widens his eyes and continues, “What? I do!”
“That’s just so lame,” Tweek laughs, enjoying the faux-flustered countenance.
Craig wets his lips, amused grin still playing at his lips, “Sorry to disappoint your eccentric highness, but that’s my final answer.”
“ Eccentric ?” Tweek repeats, another scoff escaping his lungs. “Is it because of where I work or my more specified music taste?”
“Which is?” Craig encourages him to reveal the contents of his playlist.
Tweek swipes his tongue against his front row of teeth, hesitating to reveal the information, “Now that I know you think I’m eccentric I don’t really wanna say.”
“It’s your turn to embarrass yourself by saying something cliche, Tweek.” Craig assures him. He hates the sound of his voice significantly less when it’s coming out of his mouth.
Tweek looks away, still feeling as though he’s grinning like a maniac. “I tend to listen to a lot of indie or alternative stuff. There’s plenty of pop and oldies that I like, too, though.”
Craig smiles, “That is pretty much what I was expecting you to say. Especially after listening to your ‘Writing Playlist’.”
Tweek groans, “Oh, fuck, I forgot I sent that to you… Just disregard this entire conversation.”
The blond’s heart swells at the sweet sound of Craig’s slightly goofy laugh. He is quite pleased with himself to be making his date chuckle so much hardly twenty minutes into the meeting, and felt even more joy and connection when Craig reveals, “I really like everything on it, though. There’s a few songs I knew and forgot about and it was cool to re-listen.”
“Which ones?” Tweek asks, curious to see which contributions to his soothing playlist inspired nostalgia within him.
Craig takes a moment to think before listening off a few, “That one popular Death Cab for Cutie song… ‘Whistle For The Choir’… That one song from Shrek ,”
“‘Accidentally in Love’?!” Tweek clarifies with a grin, “I love that song. Why did those movies have an amazing soundtrack for no reason?”
“Right?” He agrees humously, pausing to sips his coffee before returning to the topic, “I am just so glad to not be listening to or discussing Christmas music.”
“Don’t get me fucking started. Retail is the worst place to work during the holiday season. I love George Micahel, but if I have to hear that fucking song one more time, I’m going to strangle myself with a candy cane.” Tweek bemoans, slapping a palm over his face dramatically.
The pair cannot help but chuckle in unison at Tweek’s ridiculous suggestion, adding, “They play it at the office I work at and I swear… it makes me significantly more suicidal as well.”
“It’s just all so terrible and uninspired,” he critiques, feeling himself seeth at the ghastly genre of music, “even if an artist I like does a Christmas cover or whatever, I hate it.”
“It’s probably being used to torture prisoners somewhere in the world as we speak.”
Tweek chuckles at the remark before shifting the conversation back a few paces, “Where do you work?”
Craig’s face seems to instantly droop at the reminder of his occupation. He sighs, “Denver Insurance Company. I’m a security analyst.”
The blond bobs his head, “I’ll pretend like I know what that means. It seems interesting, though!”
“Fuck off, no it doesn’t.” Craig snorts, swirling his plastic straw around the cup, “I fucking hate that place.”
Tweek frowns sympathetically, feigning for interest, “Do you need, like, a degree to work there?”
“Nope. I mean, I have one, but it’s not for my job. It’s for graphic design.” Craig answers bitterly.
“Well that’s cool! I take it you don’t do much with it, though?”
Craig shakes his head, “Just my own projects and some light freelancing. I’ve done plenty of Christmas cards or birthday invitations.”
“Anything you could show me?” Tweek requests, perking his head toward him.
As slumps down to reach the side pocket of his coat for his cell-phone, Tweek notices his outwear is much warmer than his own. He has always wondered if he is insane for only needing one layer to combat the aggressive Colorado cold when others bundle themselves up in thick scarves, hats, and peacoats. Craig obtains his black Android and scrolls for a moment, then reveals an example of his graphic designing skills.
“I did this for a couple of friends last week.” Craig provides more context as Tweek examines the immaculate work. A gorgeous blonde woman and a boyish brunette man had been believably photoshopped to replace Will Ferrel and Zooey Deschanel’s characters in the famous Christmas-themed masterpiece.
Tweek smiles, “This is really good! And funny. You like Elf ?”
Craig shuts off his phone and shrugs, “The first time, maybe.”
“Wow. You hate Christmas music and movies? You’re like the Grinch.” Tweek jests.
Craig points a finger to him, “Now, that’s a Christmas movie I don’t get tired of. Jim Carrey’s version or the cute, little cartoon.”
Tweek laughs, shaking his head, “God, Jim Carrey’s version is one of those chaotic evil nightmare movies I can’t believe my mom let me watch so young.”
“What’s your go-to holiday feature, then?” Craig asks.
Tweek hesitates again, feeling blush instantly rise against his skin. He wets his lips and does his best to grant Craig a serious expression. “Do not fucking judge me.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it.”
“Okay… Love Actually …”
Craig pauses for a moment, doing his best not to burst out laughing. He purses his lips and finally sighs, “Don’t you dare say it’s because you had a crush on Hugh Grant.”
“What?! He’s cute!” Tweek defends. He crosses his arms over his chest when Craig continues snickering at his answer. “Sue me for enjoying cheesy declarations of love and workplace romance.”
“I just wouldn’t expect you to like something so… straight.”
After they both laughed at Tweek’s film preferences, the blond pouts a lip, “Can we just talk about music again? I felt a lot less lame during that discussion.”
Craig smirks, “We can talk about anything you want, and you’re never lame.”
Their stares linger for a moment, studying and understanding one another completely even through a fleeting interaction. The strong feelings stirring within Tweek’s chest grants him the confidence to ask suggestively, “So, on my playlist… What do you think about ‘Falling in Love at a Coffee Shop’?”
Craig falters slightly, but grins despite himself, maintaining the heart-racing contact. He returns, “I, uh… I really like that one.”
“Pretty relatable, huh?” Tweek quips as he raises his beverage to his lips again.
“Mhmm.” Craig merely hums in response, features taking on a bit of a more nervous expression, though his small smile remains.
The two linger at the table for a bit longer, fellow customers rushing in and out for Kenny to fulfill their orders. On the way out of the front door, the worker spouts, “Y’all cute!”
Tweek shoots him a glare that looks annoyed but actually means that he will fill him in later. Kenny salutes and Tweek steps outside with Craig, who is shrugging on his coat. The cool breezes slaps them both on the back of their necks as they trek towards the coffee shop’s measly parking lot. The reach Craig’s maroon vehicle first, and he pauses to gaze down at Tweek sweetly, “Thanks for inviting me out for coffee. Definitely worth skipping work.”
Tweek widens his eyes, “You called off work for this?!”
Craig laughs, shaking his head, “No, I have a bunch of vacation days I need to use or else I’ll lose them. Though, you are definitely worth calling off for.”
The comment reddens Tweek’s already rosy cheeks even further. The remain there for a moment, frozen in time with the aid of the nippy winter weather. Craig speaks again first, “I should probably be off, though…”
“Oh, yeah, me too.” Tweek agrees, though he has nothing planned for the remainder of his day (aside from trekking right back into the shop to gush about his perfect date to Kenny.
“Thanks again for inviting me out,” Craig says, leaning down as Tweek reels in to wrap him in a hug.
Tweek’s heart flutters at the contact, the smell of his cologne intoxicating him. The draw back just enough to peer into one another’s eyes again. With Craig’s gorgeous, round hazels gazing down at him fixedly, pink lips moistened, and cute nose slightly red from the low temperatures, he cannot help himself. He leans up on his toes and shuts his eyes, pressing their lips together in a chaste, gentle kiss. Sparks ignite Tweek’s being at the warm waves of pleasure that the action causes to course through his being.
When they pull away, Craig appears caught off guard—and not in a good way. His lips fall into a panicked, straight line he stares away like a deer caught in headlights. Tweek’s heart sinks to the base of his stomach, instantly backing away from the other man and apologizing, “God, I’m so sorry, was that too much?”
It takes Craig a moment to catch up, and he shakes his head, “No! No, no, I’m—that was great, I just… shit, I’m so sorry, Tweek,”
“Sorry for what?” Tweek mumbles, heart racing in the way that causes an unpleasant ache.
Craig looks down, shame crossing over his features. “I, uh… I sort of have a boyfriend…”
The sinking feeling is almost instantly replaced with overwhelming wrath. He flicks his enraged stare back up to Craig’s guilty face, “I’m sorry, what ?!”
“I’m so sorry, Tweek, I meant to tell you, I just…” the dark-haired man sighs, rubbing his eyes and shaking his head, "Fuck, I’m so sorry,”
Tweek backs away, dumbfounded. For the first time all he wants to do is smack Craig’s gorgeous face. “Alright, well… Fuck you, and lose my number, asshole. And if I found out who your poor boyfriend is, trust me, I’ll let him know.”
With that, and a heart pounding harshly, Tweek spins around and stomps to his car. Feeling extremely angry and embarrassed, he starts the vehicle up and allows him a moment to calm down and clear his mind. Unable to process what had just happened, he remains in the parking spot for a span of ten minutes before driving off, regretting ever showing up for the best and worst date he’s ever had.
_
He has been in a bad mood for the past week. As if the Christmas season wasn’t enough to piss him off, some fucking two-faced jerk had to lead him on. He was fucking perfect, until he wasn’t, and Tweek supposed that was the time old tail. He goes on a date, date goes well, and then, the guy turns out to be a major douchebag. He is so tired of going on these dates, just to be completely disappointed over unworthy men.
He wants to scream at the customers who ask him stupid questions. He wants to stomp on the stupid citirine crystal Craig gave him. He wants to smash it into pieces and use one of the shards to puncture anyone who is unfaithful to their partner.
Craig texted him the day after the date, saying he broke up with his boyfriend. Tweek was tempted to write back, well, good for fucking you, but it’s a little too late for that, but he restrained. He figured not texting back spoke higher volumes, and it appeared true because Craig texted him again the next day with a whole-ass paragraph, explaining how he wanted out of his relationship for some time. Again, Tweek thought of replying, well, why the fuck didn’t you END the relationship then? But again, he restrained. By the third text, which was more or less, Craig begging for another chance, Tweek texted back, delete my number, or I block you.
He hadn’t heard from him since. That final text was yesterday, and while he wants to believe Craig was at least smart enough to know when to fuck off, he kind of doubts it. The man was obviously incredibly stupid enough to go on a date with a guy he supposedly liked whilst dating someone he didn’t like. It just made no sense whatsoever.
It really sucks too because Craig was fucking perfect. He is so damn good-looking thatTweek has to stop himself from thinking about him at night when he jerks off. He is so fucking hot; hotter than any date he’s had before. He supposes it makes sense that the hottest guy he’s ever managed to score a date with was, at the time of the date and all the flirtation beforehand, taken. No, Tweek Tweak doesn’t deserve to have someone hot and single .
Single .
That’s how low Tweek’s bar is set, and Craig couldn’t even manage that.
It makes him sick, and that sick feeling only expands when the shop bell rings, and he sees the exact reason for his bad mood walking into the shop. He gapes at the dark-haired cheating man. He feels like he is going to burst into flames; burning the whole shop down, and hopefully taking Craig as a casualty.
He glowers at the man as he walks up to him. A few customers loiter in the shop, otherwise Tweek would probably lunge forward and shove him out of the property.
With every step he takes toward the register, Tweek’s blood boils higher. He mindlessly grabs onto the amethyst crystal he wears around his neck. It’s supposed to be calming, but right now, Tweek is sure nothing can calm him down.
“What the fuck are you doing here?” Tweek whisper-shouts at the dark-haired male as he nears the register.
He holds a frown to his lips; a sigh escaping his mouth. “I just —,” his shoulders fall, “I feel really bad about how things went down, and I just thought that maybe if I apologized in person,”
“No,” Tweek narrowed his eyes on the noirette. “No, that doesn’t change the fact that you fucking had a boyfriend and went on a date with me!”
“I didn’t mean to,”
“What!?”
“I didn’t mean to, like, go on a date with you — I just. I don"t know. I really liked you, and I was trying to tell myself that getting coffee was innocent enough where it wouldn’t be cheating… I have been in a really bad place with my boyfriend for a while and —,”
“Save it. I read your texts. I don’t give a shit about your failed relationship,” Tweek holds up a hand up to him, staring at the countertop with a hardened glare. “I made it obvious I was into you. I refuse to believe you didn’t realize that, so you’re either the stupidest person on the planet to not see that I was into you, or you’re the stupidest person on the planet for going a date with someone while dating someone else,” Tweek turned his head to glare at Craig. “Either way, I want you to get the fuck out of this shop.”
Craig stands, stunned and mouth fumbling. “I really like you,”
“If you mean that, you’ll leave… seriously, it’s the least you can do.”
Craig sighs and nods. He turns to leave, but before he gets more than two steps away, he turns back to say, “Well, if it counts for anything… That was the best time I’ve had in a long time. And I wish more than anything that I could have done things differently… ” and with that, Craig walks away. Tweek frowns; hating to agree with him. It was the best date he’s ever had. He’s never felt more connected to someone in his whole life. He felt like he could say anything, and Craig would either attentively listen, or contribute with something equally as fascinating.
He stares at the citrine crystal and frowns. He really wishes to break it, but the crystal is meant for luck, and for some reason, breaking a crystal meant for luck just seems like inherently bad news. He wants to break the crystal, but a part of his heart still warms over the fact that Craig gave it to him.
As the next couple days pass, his initial anger unfortunately morphs into sadness. He tries his best to hold onto that anger because he rather be angry than sad, but eventually, sadness wins out. He misses their daily text conversations. While the duration of text messaging was short, it somehow feels as if they were going back and forth for weeks .
When Craig texts him, just saying again… with the fear of being blocked… I’m sorry, and I would do absolutely ANYTHING, for a second chance, Tweek wants to block his number, but he can’t bring himself to do it.
_
“Hey, it’s 2. Are you sure you don’t need me anymore?”
Tweek’s coworker, Lotus, had pulled him from his thoughts as he counted the store’s inventory. He glances down to find her concerned smile and pretty, blue eyes. He lets out a breath as he dusts off his hands, “Yeah, I got it. Labor’s probably at over 50% with how slow we are.”
Lotus lifts an eyebrow, “And, you know, it’s a holiday.”
Tweek shrugs, grunting, “Just another day.”
Christmas Eve is nothing special to him, especially considering his stress-inducing family gathers Christmas Day. Even then, he is seriously considering feigning an illness this year.
Lotus pulls her wavy, blue hair from a loose pony-tail as she takes a moment to come up with a tactful response to her friend. “What are you doing tonight? Alice and Jules are coming over to have drinks, you should join us. Maybe invite Kenny, too?”
Tweek shrugs, jotting down a few numbers onto his clipboard as he replies, “Maybe… Thanks for asking, though.”
She nods and leaves him there, heading back to the counter to prepare for her departure. It will not be much longer before Tweek shuts the shop down completely, given permission from his boss to do so whenever he completes a check-list of tasks, and that their clientele included one person since they opened up at 10A.M.
It’s a bit over an hour later when Tweek completes his final duty, crossing it off his list (which isn’t necessary, but is quite satisfying). He allows himself a moment to check his phone, muscle memory taking him straight to Instagram. With each photo of festive friends, acquaintances, and famous people basking in the holiday spirit and enjoying celebrations, he wants to vomit a bit more. After easily wasting 15 minutes watching a combination of humorous and political reels, he shuts down his phone and grabs the red-handled dust mop from the small supply closet behind the cash desk. He goes to work pushing around dirt from the linoleum floor before clocking out and locking up.
While tending to a back aisle, Tweek hears a tapping at the glass near the entrance. He knits his eyebrows together, unenthused to have to inform a customer that they are closed for the day, though he had already flipped the sign on the door signifying such information. He props the cleaning instrument against a display shelf and heads toward the front of the boutique.
Tweek stops dead in his tracks when he finds the culprit of the noise.
Craig is standing outside, cradling white poster boards in his hand and an apologetic expression across his handsome face. Fury flares back up inside Tweek at the irritating presence of the jackass that had no respect whatsoever for boundaries. He trudges toward the entrance, nose and lips scrunched, ready to tell Craig off. Upon being close enough to see what he was holding, however, Tweek pauses and considers the words written in bold, Black words.
You asked me not to come into the store…
Tweek’s furious glare remains unchanging, though he knows exactly what Craig is doing. He curses the easily manipulated heart inside his chest that melts at this gesture, wanting more than anything to accept and appreciate the recreation of the most notable scene from his favorite holiday movie, as well as the fact that Craig recalled this. He remains frozen in place as Craig continues to flip the cards.
But I had to tell you this
Without hope or agenda,
Because it’s Christmas
(And at Christmas you tell the truth)
That you are the most amazing person I have ever met
The blond heart officially dissolves, being replaced with a swell of admiration for the idiot outside. He lets the grin he’s been fighting dash across his lips, scanning his eyes over the card again and again, feeling a bit disappointed when Craig turns to the next one.
I don’t deserve to be able to tell you that
But I would never forgive myself
If I let you go without giving everything I have
For a chance for us to look like this…
The following poster is a stock photo of two men holding hands. Tweek laughs at the corniness, a sight that brings a smile to Craig’s face from the other side of the glass. He appreciates the effort in finding a depiction that mimicked their hair colors as well.
I’m so sorry I fucked this up
So if no part of you feels the same
I’ll do this..
The second photograph was a man walking along down a road. Tweek rolls his eyes at this one.
And this…
The third and final picture was a man crying, mouth wide open and visible tears streaming down his face. Crossing his arms over his chest and shaking his head, Craig flips through the final few cards. His eyes blaze with a sincerity that is detectable even through the smudged, glass barrier.
Because you are perfect.
Merry Christmas
Granting himself a moment to reel from the romantic, themed gesture, Tweek worries his bottom lip and hold’s Craig’s stare. The dark haired man shares a final, sad parting grin before bending down and collecting the poster boards. The sinking feeling in Tweek’s stomach with the thought of Craig leaving says it all; his gut urges him to finish the scene from Love Actually and run out the door after him.
Tweek drops his arms, pacing swiftly over to the door and patting the pocket of his jeans to ensure the store key remains there. Once positive he can get back in, he flings the door open and exclaims, “Hey!”
Craig stops in his tracks not too far from Tweek’s place of employment. He readjusts the poster boards situated under his arm and allows a hopeful grin to light up his face. He retraces his steps to meet Tweek half way.
When they are within arms reach of one another, they both freeze. Tweek is filled to the brim of conflicting thoughts and feelings fighting for dominance, but the strongest instinct is urging him to not let the man before him go. Though he previously harbored primarily contempt, he is softened by the persistence Craig displayed to win him back, and with the feeling that there was truly something special between them.
“So… That was pretty fucking gay.” Tweek comments after a bout of vaguely uncomfortable silence.
Craig chuckles, still sheepish, “I’m glad that came across… Look, Tweek, I am so—“
Tweek raises a palm to him, cutting him off, “I don’t want to hear it. Clearly, you’re sorry. All I want to know is… just, why didn’t you tell me you had a boyfriend? I’m not an asshole, we could still have been friends.”
“I know, and I should have told you, I just… I was planning to break up with my ex after the holidays because I didn’t want to be that asshole that dumps someone right before Christmas, but I don’t know… I just didn’t want to miss my chance with you,” Craig explains slowly. “I should have just admitted I didn’t want to be just your friend… I’m really sorry.”
Tweek still feels pretty annoyed about the whole thing, but he can no longer deny it at least makes sense . Idiotic sense , of course, but the sentiment seems genuine. It’s especially difficult to disregard the tight knot of desire in his stomach for the man before him. He sighs, “Well… how do I know you’re not just going to get bored of me and do the exact same thing?”
Craig grins sheepishly, “I don’t think getting bored of you is remotely possible. But, I understand where you’re coming from. If you give me another chance we can take it as slowly as you want.”
The blond chews and swallows the offer and the beat of his heart skips a bit more pleasantly. He allows himself that stupid, giddy grin that has been attempting to cross his face since the first flip of the cards. He arches his eyebrows, maintaining the air of dignity, “How about we start with you helping me sweep and buying me Christmas Eve dinner?”
Craig’s unsure grin swiftly becomes a gorgeous beam that threatens to blind Tweek and make him officially fall in love. He nods, “I would do anything for you.”
“Obviously,” Tweek says with a click of the tongue, eyeing the large poster cards in his hand.
Frowning down at the objects, Craig asks, “Was it too stupid?”
Tweek shakes his head, simpering as he holds the glass door to the shop ajar for him to pass through. “It was the perfect amount of stupid.”
The pair become slowly reacquainted as Craig sweeps up piles of dust while Tweek counts down his register. The other man’s presence puts him at such ease, and though the anger and frustration he caused him does not magically fade away, Tweek thinks that if he keeps doing things for him, smiling at him, existing near him, that he will soon forgive him.
It is Christmas, after all.
_
“Come on, babe, we’re going to be late.”
Tweek rolls his eyes at the sound of his third warning cutting through the hum of his hair-dryer. He is already slightly irritated that he is forced to blow-dry his curls instead of letting the air do its job, but to his fiancé"s credit , they were going to be late. He finishes catering to the back section of his hair before shutting off the appliance and pulling his slightly damp locks in a loose bun.
On exiting the bathroom, he finds Craig standing in the middle of their shared apartment, looking unfairly gorgeous and ready to leave. His almost-black hair is in desperate need of a trim, but looks rather amazing, fallen into a straight pattern across his forehead and down the nape of his neck. Tweek wishes he had time to run his fingers along the perfectly maintained stubble adorning the lower half of his face and push his hands beneath the textured, black sweater and army green jacket covering his torso. He settles for curling his arms around his waist and pouting a lip up at him, “So we have to go?”
Craig slings his arms around the shorter man’s shoulders and presses a kiss to his forehead. He sighs, “Unfortunately, yes. They are still furious at me for ditching them for you the year before last.”
“Yeah, but it was our first day as a couple, we had to spend it together,” Tweek mumbles against his chest. “Nevermind it was Christmas .”
The dark haired man chuckles and gingerly pushes Tweek to arms length, scanning his eyes along his body and face. He’s clad in an oversized, plaid sweater with a v-neck, black turtleneck underneath, his smooth skin shining with the proper amount of sleep for once and his short coils of his fair hair sticking up around his forehead and ears. Though he knows it will make them even later than they are already destined to be, he surges forward and attaches their lips.
Tweek grins into the kiss, the taste of his spearmint toothpaste clashing with his coffee-flavored tongue. Their lips glide together in a slow, sensual manner that leaves them both hungry for more, especially when his weakness is exploited from Craig traveling down to press a kiss beneath his earlobe.
“Can we at least leave early?” the blond sighs, enjoying the blissful sensation of Craig’s warm lips against the sensitive skin of his neck.
“Absolutely,” Craig promises in a husky tone, drawing back up to steal another lingering kiss, “We need to do our bodily gift exchange.”
Tweek barks a laugh as they pull apart. “Thanks for effectively cooling me down with that dorky comment.”
“I got plenty more where that came from.” Craig assures with a chuckle as they pair finally exit to head to the Tucker’s family get together.
Like every year, Tweek is inwardly attempting to find a way to evade the Tweak Christmas party, but part of him is looking forward to it merely to show off his incredible partner. Though the season always somewhat reminds Tweek of the rocky start to their relationship, it also warms his soul to realize how far they have come, and how solid they are two years later. They are soon to be wed, they’re sharing an upscale apartment in Denver, and they just purchased another cat together to befriend Tweek’s. Though things aren’t always perfect, he is glad he went with his gut and decided to spend Christmas with the guy who cheated on his boyfriend for him.
And he truly cannot wait to incorporate that fact into his vows.