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Janus and Remus couldn’t understand Virgil’s desire to keep a calendar for the Human world in his room in the Fae one. After all, he spent most of his time in the Fae world, barely keeping in contact with his human family. Perhaps they were right. Perhaps it would have been better if he just let himself forget about the Human world while he was here. Then he wouldn’t need to stare at the calendar and check off the date of December 25, Christmas Day.
He couldn’t help but glance over at Logan’s side of the room. Of course, the absence of his boyfriend was nothing unusual. He slept with Remus sometimes, though that was rare since that left Janus and Virgil alone. If only he could pretend that was all this was, that Logan was a room away rather than a whole dimension. The date on the calendar, however, reflected the reality of the situation.
“Go ahead and visit your family, Logan,” he had said. “I’m used to not doing anything for the holidays. I’ll be okay here.” It wasn’t that he didn’t understand Logan’s decision. It was only natural to want to spend the holidays with one’s family and, since he wasn’t out to his parents yet, going home by himself was the only way to do that. Virgil spent his entire childhood wishing to spend Christmas with his parents. How could he deny his love that?
Virgil walked downstairs and saw Remus and Janus cuddling on the couch. One might think it would feel awkward to be alone in the house with your partner’s other partner and the other partner’s other partner, but they would be wrong. At least, Virgil didn’t feel any less awkward than he normally did. He got along with the fae well enough, even learning to bake fae sweets from Janus. They treated Virgil rather well considering the fact that housing a human was very uncommon here.
“Good Christmas to you, or whatever it is humans say today,” Janus said. Christmas was a strictly human holiday, so Virgil appreciated the effort, no matter how halfhearted it was.
“Merry Christmas,” Virgil corrected, “or happy if you’re British.”
“Merry as in happy or marry as in marriage?”
Virgil rolled his eyes. “Yeah, I’m just gonna go marry a holiday.”
“Whatever you’re into, I don’t judge.” Remus winked. Virgil had no idea how to respond to that, so he continued on his way to the kitchen.
Virgil couldn’t understand why Logan wanted to date Remus at first. Remus was a trickster fae, meaning he would go down to the human world and mess with people. Logan, the detail oriented guy he was, made for an easy target. Virgil didn’t get to see the change himself, but eventually a genuine romance bloomed out of it. When Logan went to Virgil to get his okay on him dating another person, Virgil almost said no. A fae that’s a literal being of chaos dating his orderly boyfriend? Surely something was up. It wasn’t until Virgil’s first formal meeting with Remus that he understood. Being a trickster required a certain kind of intelligence that differed from Logan’s. They discussed things all the time, rarely agreeing, but never seeing the other as lesser for it. It gave Logan a kind of friendly challenge he couldn’t get from Virgil, who couldn’t stand even friendly confrontation. The two were the embodiment of opposites attract and made each other better for it.
Thinking of this just made Virgil miss his boyfriend more. Sure, he didn’t have the same sort of ‘we’re so different yet made for each other’ thing he had with Remus, but they still had something special. Virgil felt at home with Logan, safe. Part of him wanted to scold himself for letting that go. The rest of him scolded the part for being selfish.
He started taking ingredients out of cabinets. He’d been cooking Christmas breakfast for himself his whole life. Why should it be any different now?
Janus stared at the staircase as he cuddled with Remus. Virgil had brought his sad stack of pancakes up there about three hours ago and they hadn’t heard from him since. It wasn’t his place to interfere, and sulking in his room was far from unusual for him, but he couldn’t help but notice the human’s depressed mood. “Virgil didn’t want Logan to go,” he said.
“He’s the one that told Logan he should.”
Janus looked up at him. “Right, because if I know anything about humans, it’s that they are incapable of lying.”
“Well, I miss him, too. Do you want to go get him? I could spook his parents while I’m there. Logan always tells me not to, but I already let them have Logan for the day. Might as well have some fun.”
Janus sighed. “Let’s hold off on that for a little bit. See if Virgil gets any worse first.”
He got worse.
Janus caught Virgil in the kitchen at noon aggressively stirring batter in a bowl. The first time he had seen Virgil stress bake, Logan explained that the structured activity plus the sweet product that comes from it serves as a good stress relief for many people. However, today this only seemed to make Virgil more irritable.
“What did that bowl do to you?” Janus asked, walking further into the room to give the impression that he had just arrived.
Virgil jumped at the unexpected sound and dropped the spoon into the bowl. “Nothing, I’m just stirring it.”
Janus picked the bowl and examined its contents. The mixture was red and had a faint smell of peppermint. “I don’t know about human sweets, but fae ones normally don’t need to be stirred nearly this much. It’ll be too heavy if you keep at it.”
Virgil ripped it from his hands. “Good thing I’m not making it for you, then.” He grabbed a cupcake tray and poured the batter into the small holes. He used a spoon to make the process quicker, filling some areas more than others.
Once the tray made its way to the over, he attempted to push his way past Janus. Janus let him. Once he was alone, he noticed some frosting and green food dye also prepared on the counter. Despite his reluctance to leave the warmth of the oven, he left in search of Remus.
He found Remus laying in their bed writing in his notebook, likely coming up with new mischievous pranks to play on humans the next time he heads out. Janus couldn’t understand why he would do this when he always just does what ‘feels right’ in the moment. Then again, he sometimes practices his evil laugh for the rare times he goes out, so he had no right to call Remus’ preparations odd.
Remus saw Janus enter and patted the spot next to him. Janus debated whether or not he should accept the silent offer. This was a pressing issue and cuddling was certainly not the ideal way to have a serious conversation, but on the other hand he was freezing. Ignoring his instinct to meet his basic needs above all else, he remained standing and said, “We need to fix the Virgil situation before his stress baking causes him to burn our house down.”
Remus shook his head. “We can’t kick him out. Logan wouldn’t like it. He’s also the only person here that likes horror and-”
“I didn’t mean we need to get rid of him.” Janus mentally berated himself for cutting his boyfriend off, but thankfully Remus was too relieved by the clarification to be hurt.
“Oh, you mean you want me to get Logan. Good, I just thought of this juicy idea.” Remus smirked at the word juicy. Janus had no intention of hearing this plan any time soon.
“No, I’m not asking you to play a trick on his parents before kidnapping him.” Remus pouted. “You can mess with them later, but I don’t want you ruining Logan’s holiday. That’d just make this worse. I only want you to tell Logan to come back as soon as he can, maybe buy Virgil a present or something. That’s a thing people do on Christmas, right?”
“Yeah, but I heard them talking about how they aren’t doing Christmas together at all this year.”
“Change of plan. I’m not about to sit through Virgil beating up another batch of cupcakes.”
Despite knowing it was necessary for Virgil’s sake or whatever, Remus was reluctant to go to Logan’s parent’s house. Even by human standards, it was dull. The only decorations were family pictures and vases, maybe an occasional candle. No creativity to be seen. He couldn’t imagine Logan growing up in a house like this, though he couldn’t imagine any human in any household not dying of boredom by age three.
Logan had set up a system with Remus for whenever he needed to find his boyfriend when he was staying with his family. Step one, he should always materialize in the hall closet. No one ever goes there and it’s right in between the living room and Logan’s bedroom. Remus can then listen for voices and hear where they’re coming from. If the coast is clear, he can sneak out and knock on Logan’s door lightly. Logan will either invite him or, if he’s not there, Remus will go in and hang out until he came back.
Remus preferred to just pop into Logan’s room and hope for the best.
“Boo!” He screamed as he appeared. He transformed the book Logan was reading into a disfigured Santa Claus doll with ten eyes, no mouth, and about 150 slimy pores.
“Ah!” Logan threw the doll across the room. Upon seeing his boyfriend, he took a breath before calmly wiping his hands off with a napkin. “Please give me my book back.”
Remus snapped his fingers and did as he was asked, even adding a bookmark on the page Logan left off on. “It’s not fun to do this anymore. You always know I’ll just give it back.”
“And yet you keep doing it…” He sighed and patted the seat next to him on the bed. “Christmas dinner will not be for some time, so thankfully we have time to talk. I assume you need something?”
Remus sat down. “Virgil’s been weird today. Jan and I think it’s cause you left and he actually didn’t want you to go.”
“... Ah.” He looked down. “I suppose I had been foolish to assume Virgil had been truthful when he said he was fine with me leaving. It was logical to assume he would have no attachment to this holiday. His family rarely had time for him, so he often spent holidays alone. I had not considered that that would make him more eager to spend the holidays with those he cares for than most, though that is also a logical conclusion.”
“I mean, if both are logical, then it’s kinda on him for not telling the truth.”
“Perhaps. I do wish he had been honest. Still, I should have pushed back and offered to stay. Or offered to let him come as a friend. Or just ripped off the figurative band aid and told my parent’s I’m gay. I’ll have to eventually.”
“Virgil’s said before he doesn’t wanna force you to come out.”
“Yes. He has also told me that he was in the closet long enough and doesn’t want to go back in for anyone. I respect that just as he respects me not coming out to my family yet. I only wish that hadn’t forced us apart today.”
Remus pulled him into a hug, resisting the hug to put a sign on his back or do some other similar trick. “I mean, it’s just a day. You guys can hang out and give each other gifts or whatever some other day.”
Logan laughed halfheartedly. “That is a logical answer, but that is not how holidays work. I believe the chance to spend Christmas with him has passed.”
“Well, you can still buy him a gift or something.”
Logan pulled out of the hug. “I already did, actually. I am aware we agreed to no gift giving this year, but I had this commissioned beforehand.” He got up and walked to his closet. He opened it up to reveal the gift.
Remus smiled. It was perfect for Virgil.
Virgil stared at his misshapen Christmas cupcakes with disgust. He really wished he put more thought into how he poured out the batter. Thankfully none of them overflowed the pan, but it was impossible for him to see the shorter cupcakes next to the taller ones and not want to throw the whole batch out. He took a bite out of one of the smaller ones. Janus was right, it was too heavy. He picked up the tray of cupcakes. ‘Into the garbage you go.’
A voice stopped him right before he could dump them into the can. “Wow, you just spent the last hour beating your cupcakes into submission and now you’ll just toss them aside? Tisk tisk, Virgil.”
Virgil slammed the tray back on the counter, causing a couple of the cupcakes to fall over. “What do you want?”
“I want you to calm down. I thought baking was supposed to help you relax?”
“It does when the cupcakes don’t get all messed up.” He glared at his batch.
“Now, that’s not the cupcake’s fault, is it?” He reached past Virgil to pick up one of the fallen over cupcakes and took a bite. He chewed slowly. “A little heavy, as expected, but otherwise pretty good. I’m sure Logan will appreciate them when he gets back.”
Virgil flinched at his boyfriend’s name. He didn’t want to think about him or this stupid holiday. He only made the cupcakes Christmas themed because it’d be obvious what he was doing if he didn’t. ‘I guess that cat’s kinda out of the bag now.’ “Just leave me alone, Jan. This isn’t your problem.”
“Right, because you stomping around my house using my food to vent your frustrations, potentially burning down my home in the process, is none of my concern.”
“I’m not gonna burn your house down.” Virgil sat down on the counter and buried his face in his hands. “I just wanna be alone right now. Don’t worry about me.”
“I don’t know if it’s different for humans, but fae don’t get to choose what they worry about.” Janus put the rest of the cupcakes right side up before sitting next to Virgil. “You should’ve told Logan you wanted him to stay this badly.”
“And stop him from seeing his family? That’s not fair.”
“To who, Logan or his family? Logan might’ve decided he’d rather be with you, but you didn’t let him make that decision. That’s hardly fair.”
“I lied so he didn’t have to choose. Don’t you always say some lies are necessary?”
“Listen, I’m all for deceiving people when the time is right, but relationships require honesty. How is Logan supposed to trust you if he knows you’re willing to lie to make him happy, even if it leads to you moping around all day like a lost puppy?”
Virgil sighed. “You’re right, but what can I do now?”
“Talk to Logan when he gets back. Figure it out from there. That’s all you really can do.” He patted Virgil on the shoulder before hopping down. “Also, put these cupcakes away. I don’t want you to come crying to me when Remus eats them all or fills them with his poo deodorant.”
Virgil stared at his door that night, unable to sleep. Logan would come back the following night. All would be well then. He could cuddle with Logan and sleep peacefully. For now, all he could do was stare as loneliness crushed him. Logically, he should have been used to this feeling. He’d felt it every major holiday since he was old enough to know most kids spent their holidays with their loving family. Since he was old enough to know most parents took care of their kids beyond basic necessities. Old enough to know what he was missing.
At least Logan would hug him sometimes. That should be enough.
A knock at his door made him flinch. Old childish paranoia told him it was probably a killer. Logically he knew a killer wouldn’t knock. “Come in,” he said sleepily.
The door opened. “I hope my arrival did not wake you.” Virgil jumped out of bed at the voice. Logan just had time to flip the light switch before Virgil had his arms around him. Suddenly embarrassed by the uncharacteristic show of affection, he went to pull away. Logan hugged him back before he could do so.
“You’re… You’re back.”
Logan nodded before ending the hug. “I told my parents I needed to leave early tomorrow morning before they would wake up. I couldn’t wait that long, though. Remus just brought me back. He… told me you were having a rough time.”
Virgil groaned. “Why? I didn’t want to ruin your holiday.”
“And I didn’t want to leave you when you were struggling. And anyway, spending my holiday with you is hardly inferior to spending it with my birth family. Different, but not inferior.”
“But you wanted to go.”
“I did, but not enough to hurt you for it. I wish you’d told me how much this meant to you.”
Virgil nodded. “I’m sorry I lied to you.”
“It’s quite alright. Let’s just promise to never lie to each other about something like this again.”
“Deal.” Virgil gave him a second, much quicker hug. As he did so, he noticed a box in the hallway. ‘What? I thought we agreed we weren’t doing presents?”
Logan moved aside to let Virgil investigate the box. “I suppose we both have one lie then. Let’s do our best to not add to that number.”
Virgil opened the present and gasped. It was a weighted blanket with a Nightmare Before Christmas pattern. “I didn’t know this existed.”
“It didn’t until I commissioned it.”
Virgil picked up the blanket and hugged it. “I love it. Thank you.” He barely even noticed as tears began falling. “This is perfect.” ‘He got me a gift. I got a gift .’
Logan knelt down and wrapped an arm around him. “Merry Christmas, my love.”