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-Hizashi, I don't think this is a good idea.- Said Aizawa anxiously as his husband threw the flag around his shoulders before starting to work on the knot around his neck so it would look more like a cape than a flag.
-You said that you would go with me this year.- Says Mic as he finished tying the knot, making sure it was tight enough so it wouldn't go loose and fall off.
-I know but that was last year.- Says the erasure hero as he looks down, fingers absently running across the soft fabric, the light colors of it making him feel warm and scared at the same time.
31 years or not he wouldn't ever be able to feel safe in his own skin, he kind of felt envy for those who were courageous enough to live an open life, proud of who they were.
A warm hand against his cheek made him look up, black meeting green.
-I know, but I want you there with me, you are perfect the way you are and you should be proud of it, I know it can be scary, but you need to start feeling proud of who you are, I promise that if you can't handle it we will leave okay?
-...Okay... - Even if he says that Aizawa isn't that sure, as much as he likes the scarf that Mic gives him, with those patterns of colors that made something fuzzy swirl in his chest, or having his cheek painted with glittery paint from a concrete set of colors.
He didn't felt safe at all looking like that.
He felt naked, no, being shirtless had nothing to do with it, he felt more like his soul was the one naked.
An open target for mockery and harm.
That's what he looked like.
He didn't like it.
Which is why the second Mic and he got there he covered his face with the scarf, shifting it and fighting it until it looked like some kind of cheap hiyab, it made him feel better, he just allowed his husband to lead him through the crowd, his hold on him gentle yet firm, eyes wandering around anxiously, as insecure as he felt, as frightened as he felt...
He also felt... warm...
To see others with his same pattern of colors, to see them so proud of themselves, so happy, so joyful...
It made him feel like somehow, around here, he was safe, like he wasn't something to be ashamed of...
It was nice.
Until it wasn't.
At some point, he doesn't know when, Aizawa's grip on his self control goes to hell, anxiety getting the better of him, suddenly he feels suffocated around people, so many voices from so many different places, thoughts running at the speed of light, insecurities flaring back on, what if someone recognized him? What if someone was pointing at him? What if someone saw him? What if everyone was staring at him for being weird? What if
What if
What if
So many what if's.
-Do you want to sit down?- Asks Mic when he notices his husband's hold on his hand tightens, even if he can't see his face he sees him nod, Mic is quick to find a bench, Aizawa sits down, hands covering his face, pulling at the scarf to hide his face even more even though his face isn't actually showing, a hand is rubbing soft circles around his back, soothing him.
Aizawa wants to cry.
Because he wants to be here, but it also scares him to death, he wants to be here, he wants to...
He wants to feel proud of himself.
But he can't.
A voice at the back of his head is hissing at him.
Making him grab the edge of the flag around his shoulders, covering his scars from prying eyes, he didn't usually mind the scars, didn't care that much about them seeing that they weren't exactly that noticeable, his parents had all but ran through the whole Japan looking for someone that could give him a surgery that would leave as minor scarring as possible, it was kind of funny if he really thought about it.
How his own parents held more pride about him than he did for himself.
The only reason he came out had been due a breakdown, not being able to hold it in anymore, the dysphoria that day had felt worse than usual, it had made him explode, screaming and crying, saying things he hadn't meant to say, but his parents hadn't minded, they had been more accepting than Aizawa would had ever thought them to be, they had helped him so much.
Then why?
Why if the two persons who were suppose to love him the most could feel pride for this he couldn't do it too?
Why did he still felt wrong?
Vulnerable.
Broken.
-Shouta, baby, you don't have to force yourself, I'm sorry I made you come here in the first place, you are the one who has to choose when you are ready for this, we can go home if you want.- Says Mic softly, Aizawa doesn't answer, all he does is hunch even more.
He feels pathetic.
-Mi-Yamada Sensei!
That voice makes Mic blink for a moment, Aizawa stiffens, fingers gripping the fabric of the scarf, making sure that he can't be seen to be recognized.
Hizashi turns to look at where the voice came from, he's quite surprised to see more than he expected.
Class 2-A was here.
As in the whole Class.
All of them sporting shirts, bracelets, headbands, face painted or whatever to show off their prideful colors, others just using the straight supporter shirts, yet Kaminari, Hagakure and Jirou were the ones to catch his attention.
They held the same color that gave Shouta such a hard time.
-Hey kiddos how you doing?!- Asks the blonde man giving them the peace sign as he waved eagerly, a bright smile plastered on his face, it wasn't like the world didn't knew Present Mic was a raging chaotic bisexual.
-Sensei you look so manly.- Sniffles Kirishima giving thumbs up.
-Why are you crying?!- Asks Mic a bit freaked out at the kid's sudden tears.
-Don't mind him, he's just overflowing with pride for others.- Chuckled Ashido, her eyes falling on the person sitting besides Mic, she couldn't exactly see his face thanks to the scarf but if his posture and Mic's hand on his back were something to go for he wasn't exactly having an easy time here.
-Is he okay?
-Yeah, he's fine, he's just not used to this kind of things.- Said Mic, he could feel Shouta was tense, he knew his husband was far from feeling comfortable with letting students of all things know what he was.
-Oh a newbie! There's no need to worry this is my first time too!- Proclaimed Kaminari gingerly as he sat by the other's side like he knew him since the beginnings of times, Kaminari hadn't exactly been eager to come here either, too nervous to dare, but then Ashido had told him she would come with him and then Kirishima and Bakugou, the ashy blonde hadn't even protested at the idea.
And then one way or another they found each other through the place until the whole Class was together in a group, it was nice, comforting to know he wasn't alone, he knew how scary could it be like, to feel like all eyes were on you, to feel like the world was rejecting you, even sometimes those from the community that were suppose to support who you were casted you aside.
But most all.
Being transgender was probably the scariest thing in the whole universe.
Because if people were to know...
The wrong ones...
It was like walking across a minefield.
Like a single wrong move could get you killed.
Walking in someone else's skin, no matter what you did you always felt in the wrong skin even by the tiniest of things.
Aizawa for his side did recognize that voice, he knew Kaminari was trans, Hagakure and Jirou too, it was on their expedient, it was amazing how someone younger than him could be so lively about it, so true to himself.
It was admirable.
-There is no need to be scared! You are manly and strong and amazing!- Says Kirishima firmly, because even if he didn't knew this person everyone deserved to feel accepted, all the support in the world, everyone deserved to be themselves without any fear, and also, there was something about this person's demeanor that for some reason felt familiar and that same time no...
-Don't be afraid to be yourself, if they can't accept you for who you are then to hell with them.- Snaps Bakugou hastily crossing his arms over his chest, why the fuck did people even had to feel the need to get mad for other's people choices? Fucking get a life is what they should do.
-Monsieur you are magnifique as you are right now you shouldn't be hiding who you are, feel no shame about yourself vous êtes incroyable!- Exclaims Aoyama gingerly, to be honest? He was feeling more happy than he had felt in a long time, after finding his class here, all of them, it made him feel overjoyed, because this time he didn't had to go around hiding himself from his classmates, praying to not be found, hoping that this time the beating wouldn't leave him unconcious.
It was a wonderful feeling.
And he wanted everyone to feel as safe and happy as he felt.
-I didn't realize who I was until I stopped being who I wasn't, sometimes it gets scary, yeah, but I always tell myself that I'm not doing anything wrong, I'm not wrong, society is the one in the wrong for trying to shut my voice down, for disregarding who I am, I, you, everyone is valid.- Said Jirou, voice soft, even if her parents had been more than accepting she had lost so many friends, subjected to so many mockery, middle school had been hell for her, but after coming to U.A...
Everyone had been so accepting... so nice... She didn't want him to feel like he should hide, no one should hide who they are, everyone should be free to express themselves without the fear of what society will do, think or say about it.
-It's not your appearance what defines who you are, it's your heart and soul, and I'm sure you are an amazing person with a wonderful heart sir!- Says Iida firmly, a hero, a human should be nice to everyone, no one was the same, everyone was different one way or another, but they all deserved the same respect, the same rights, the right to feel safe with themselves,
Because at the end of the day gender, sexuality, race, religion, none of that mattered.
Because they were all humans.
Aizawa for his side...
He didn't knew how to feel about this, these kids...
They were so pure.
Would they still think the same if they were to know just who he was? Aizawa had never had a good reputation with students, not that he cared, never cared either to let them into his deepest secret, little bastards would only use it to take advantage of him, humiliate him, call him names, derogatory comments thrown his way.
He didn't need that.
But these kids...
He wanted them to know, he truly did...
But he found himself struggling to even move, the grip he held on the flag around his shoulders, tight, to cover his chest, it refused to loosen itself, he wanted to tell them.
But he didn't held the guts to do so.
Wasn't he suppose to be their teacher?
A leading model, show them that they should accept and love themselves for who they were, wasn't he the one who told Uraraka to ignore the comments about her weight? He who told Yaoyorozu that her body didn't define her worth, that no one was able to define anyone's worth.
Then why?
Why couldn't he follow his own advices?
Dammit.
-You know, I like your scarf, it's pretty!- Chirped Hagakure, because the thing held cat paws on the white sides by the end of one of the edges.
-Shinso would kill for that scarf.- Snickers Kaminari.
-Why would I do such a thing? But just asking for a friend where did you got it?- Deadpans the purple haired boy, there is something about this person... it feels familiar...
-Oh he actually was the one who knitted the whole thing and sew the cat paws, threatened murder on Midnight if she dared to steal it.- Snickered Mic, it had been funny to see Shouta pointing at Nemuri with a needle, threatening her with it like it was mighty sword.
-Midnight is ace?- Asks Kaminari totally not expecting that.
-Nah, she just loves teasing the hell out of him, it's her passion, her reason to keep living some may also say.- That gets him a few snickers.
-Is he a hero too?- Asks Midoriya suddenly excited at the prospect, and he wasn't the only one, I mean, LGBTQ heroes were so little to none out there, only Mic, Midnight and Ms.Joke were flaring up in pride for their bisexuality, it would be amazing to know there was a transgender hero out there, it made Kaminari, Jirou and Hagakure feel...
Happy...
Less nervous about their dream choice.
About themselves in general.
-Of course he is! He's a wonderful one on top of that! A badass boy who makes villains want to call for a hero to save them!- That gets Mic a snort of amusement from his husband, he can't help but smirk at that.
-So cool!
-So manly!
-I wanna be that type of hero dude, just imagine a villain calling for a hero to save their asses from another hero!- Laughs Sero at the solely prospect.
-What's his hero name? His quirk?
-I don't know, that would kind of give him away wouldn't it? Plus, it's not like you don't exactly know who he is.- Says Mic playfully as he wraps his arms around the other.
-He's the kitten?!- Gasps half of the group as realization hit them, the whole world knew about Mic's "kitten", the husband the guy was obsessed to show off at any given opportunity in his radio show, it was both cute and hilarious to be honest.
Mic grins at that.
-Yeah, he's my precious rainbow dashing boy!
Aizawa's eyebrow twitched at that, even more at the brats' nerve to laugh at it, he could feel his face heating up either way as his mouth moved without his brain's consent.
-Call me like that again and I will rip your tongue out.
The Class' eyes widened.
That voice.
They would recognize that voice anywhere.
-Aizawa Sensei?!
The person in question jerked his elbow, hitting Mic on the ribs.
-Why do you hit me you were the one who revealed yourself!- Protested the voice hero as he leaned away from the other, the scarf left the man's face, enough to show murder in those eyes against Mic.
Jesus Christ it was him.
Fucking Aizawa was Mic's kitten.
Holy shit.
-If you didn't held the need to give me such stupid nicknames I wouldn't see myself in the need to hit you you fucking soggy breadstick.- Snaps the erasure hero briskly making a few kids sweatdrop at the nickname, Aizawa tugged at the scarf, freeing the rest of his face, there was a rainbow glittery flag painted on his cheek!
-That's your fault no one asked you to be so cute!- Accused Mic like it was the century's sin.
Aizawa grew red at that.
He honest to God grew red.
-That's so cute!- Cried Ashido with stars in her eyes, because Mic and Aizawa were together! That shit was cute! And he was blushing! Yet it kind of now felt a bit...
Sad...
To know he of all people was scared, because to them, Aizawa had always seemed like a man who didn't let anything get to him, brave beyond words with no fear in the world, an untouchable being able to handle anything.
Now they kind of realized they had forgotten about something.
Aizawa was human, not a robot.
To know he felt fear to show who he was, that didn't settle right, because he was amazing, scary as fuck yeah but a wonderful person either way, he shouldn't be afraid, if all, he should be giving the middle finger to everyone and anyone sending to hell itself, because he had accomplished more than half of Japan's population may ever achieve (okay maybe there was a bit of exaggeration there who the fuck cares? Aizawa was badass as fuck).
-Sensei can I hug you?- Asked Ashido looking like she may die either of fear for asking or disappointment if he refused.
Aizawa looked at the group, actually looked, the way they held themselves, like they feared no God, so proud, so secure, confident...
It made something he refused to acknowledge as pride for them swirl inside his chest, these kids...
Maybe for once the teacher was gonna be the one learning from their student.
-Fine, but don't get used to it, I don't like hugs.- States Aizawa releasing his hold on the flag, arms opening in a mildly dramatic inviting manner, face flat, Ashido made a funny noise of excitement at it, jumping to throw her arms around him.
-No fair at all can I have one too?- Asks Kaminari giving him puppy eyes, Aizawa side glances at the boy before sighing, throwing one of his arms around the kid's shoulders to pull him into a side hug.
-I want a hug too you know?- States Shinso like the solely fact of Aizawa allowing Ashido and Kaminari to hug him first was the world's greatest crime.
-Fine, but again, don't get used to it.- Shinso gives him an altive smile, one that perfectly says "You wish" before hugging him.
Soon, Aizawa founds himself being hugged by 20 brats, Mic's snickering at him, snapping a picture, Aizawa glares at him, yet he can't really bring himself to feel mad at his husband as he lightly smiles, mouthing something to the voice hero despite all.
"Thank You."
-Say, would you make me one of these if I score higher than everyone in the next test?- Asks Shinso as he pokes at the scarf for more emphasis, Aizawa gives the boy a blank look.
-Maybe.
Shinso grins at that.
Yet Aizawa knows.
The kid didn't need to score high.
He was gonna make him one either way.
May or may not feel kinder and make something for the others too.
After all, they lifted the anxiety he held since he stepped in this place.