Chapter Text
"That's it, baby..." his warm breath ghosted against your earlobe, your legs expanding wider and wider with each heavy thrust. "Let me all the way in..." a whispered groan came next in harmony with your whimpers and gasps for air. "...you got even tighter...fuck..."
He was right.
You'd been working on your kegel exercises since you'd been apart from one another. Not only was Charlie being sent into utter euphoria over it but so were you. Every deep thrust inside was met with even more passion as you squeezed when he pulled back.
"Jesus..." he smiled, biting down on his bottom lip, eyes dancing all over your face, taking in every inch of you that he missed. "You're gonna make me cum, princess."
That was all the warning you needed and within seconds you had pushed as much of his massive weight so that the two of you rolled, putting you on top and in control.
"Let's make sure that doesn't happen yet," you planted both hands on his solid chest and arched your back, starting out slow with controlled movements; teasing and measured, the kind that leaves him almost...angry to cum.
His ample hands clunge to your hips, threatening to overpower you, which of course you both knew that he could. But he didn't want to. No, not tonight. Tonight he was yours.
The expression on his face alternated between pleasure and frustration as you giveth and taketh away his build. Your body moved with seduction, up and down his fervent cock in perfect rhythm. You could feel him becoming harder against your walls as you watched his breath become ragged, face blooming with need.
And with that, you'd stop.
Sitting still on his lap, cockwarming him, and pinching his nipples while he growled and grumbled in protest.
Charlie looked up at you, fire and desperation in his eyes as a wicked grin widened across your face.
"Are you really gonna cum before I cum first?" You playfully warned, slowly lifting your hips up, stroking him lazily with your superbly tight cunt that was clearly driving him wild.
He groaned. "No."
Releasing his sensitive nipples, you began to ride him again.
"Good. That's a good boy."
You focused on your own build, changing pace based on your own needs and wants. With your free hand, you drew circles against the bundle of nerves that slid so very close to the massive shaft stretching you open wide. Charlie's head angled forward to watch as if he was studying exactly how you pleasure yourself.
With a flex of his abdominals, he perched up to his elbows, watching you bounce so beautifully on top of him. He spit at your sex, basically adding more fuel to the already blazing fire you were both making. You felt the slick hit your fingers as you rubbed it against your core. That move propelled you faster towards your climax.
"Fuck, Charlie..." You moaned out, his hand wrapping around your throat immediately after the words left your mouth.
"That's not my fucking name..." he struggled to say as he was holding back the biggest load of all time, trying furiously to maintain control over himself and you.
It was the type of manly power struggle that made you giggle not only inside your head but out loud, as well.
Oops.
A squeeze to your larynx shut you up rather quickly.
"Ahh-..." you cupped his strong wrist, feeling the tendons and muscles tense under your touch, your other hand working restlessly on your swollen clit.
There was no time to correct yourself and call him 'daddy', or apologize... the lack of oxygen was exactly what you needed, shoving you into a vision of white and absolute elation.
Charlie released his grip, blood rushing back to your brain, lungs filling with air as if you had, in fact, been rebirthed. You cursed into the air, shouting nonsense, feeling your body being twisted around swiftly like a doll as Charlie moved to fuck you from behind.
"Good girl. Now it's my turn." He smacked the flesh of your ass, spreading you open with both hands to admire parts of you that had been untouched by him for so long. You felt the tip of his cock slipping up and down your wet slit, with pressure being applied against your tight ass. The memory of him shoving his thick thumb inside came to mind quickly.
But this...wasn't his thumb.
He knew you had never done anal and although you weren't against trying it, you had doubts that you could handle it, especially the size of Charlie splitting you open.
You felt him toying with the idea, humming in thought as he pressed his hard dick against your back door.
Wiggling your hips, you let out a playful giggle. "Whatcha doing, professor?"
He leaned down and placed a soft kiss on the peak of your shoulder, breathing out a smile at the new nickname.
"Can I have this ass?" he whispered, teeth lightly nibbling at the curve of your neck.
You hummed, pulling your hips upwards and arching your back.
"Don't you mean May I have this ass?" your words were halfway muffled against the pillow.
Charlie pulled himself up to his knees, keeping you firmly tucked under him and flat against the mattress. His hips rocked back and forth, indecent cock stroking between your ass cheeks. He lifted his heavy length, slapping your plump flesh.
You sensed wetness falling from above, creeping down the division that led to the one place only Charlie had touched before. Pressure came again, a low groan from behind you made you bite at your lip. He was so eager for you this way. Careful to not push forward until you gave him permission.
"May I?"
With a deep breath, you reached one hand up to grab ahold of the headboard, turning a wooden plank into your means of salvation should you need it, using your other hand to reach back and help guide him.
"Okay..."
With both of you grasping his manhood, he pushed past the threshold and your breath caught in your chest. An unthinkable amount of sensation came over you, feeling as if he was truly splitting you open. Slowly, inch by divine painful inch, he bottomed out and stayed still until the initial sting became tolerable enough. You could feel his entire body tensed and heated above you. What you didn't see was the state of wonderment on his normally stoic face.
The man was blissed out.
"Fuck, baby..." he gently pressed his weight against you, slipping a hand between your body and bed sheets so he could feel just how wet this made you. A discovery that made him twitch inside the tight space he buried himself into.
"This ass..." he shoved two fingers into your aching core. "...is mine now. Just like this tight cunt."
You couldn't have agreed more.
He pulled back carefully then back in, a new but familiar burn in your belly. It wasn't until he had a good rhythm that you felt a second wave of pleasure hit. You grabbed his hand, blindly shoving fingers into your mouth. Muffling your cries into his hand before directing it back down to your center. Charlie knew what you needed and he delivered with all three fingers sinking into your throbbing pussy, his thumb pressing your clit.
His thrusting turned feral, pounding into your ass as you came harder than the first time, your teeth biting at the pillow, screams of bliss vibrating through the entire bed.
Charlie came next, filling you up in places that only he had been allowed to enter.
No words beyond curses actually left the nonsensical moans, grunts, and groans that filled the room and echoed through the rest of the empty house.
Thank god Henry was at his mother's for the weekend.
Sweating and heaving for every ounce of oxygen that there was in the humid air surrounding the room, you both laid side by side, staring up at the ceiling while you composed yourselves.
Charlie reached for a cigarette from his nightstand, lighting it and offering it to you. You accepted and puffed as if it was going to give you life back. Passing it back, you looked over at him, waiting for some kind of feedback to the newest adventure you just embarked on.
He looked at you, your eyes meeting between the soft dance of smoke.
"Did you like it?" He asked, a small grin pulling at the corners of his mouth as he took another drag.
Obviously, you did.
"I don't know. Ask me tomorrow after I walk around for a bit and try to act like I wasn't just fucked up the ass."
You both chuckled, turning into each other for a cuddle.
"Fair enough." He kissed your cheek. "Thanks for trusting me."
Laying in Charlie's arms felt so incredibly soothing, especially after something so new and intense. He seemed to know exactly how to handle the situation...asking permission, making you feel comfortable. That line of thinking only made you wonder how many times he had done it before.
Asking would only stir up unnecessary drama so you refrained. You were getting better about picking your battles when it came to Charlie's past as well as your own.
Instead, you chose to enjoy the peaceful stillness of post-sex cuddling with him. Something you missed dearly over the past month. The rise and fall of his warm chest under your head and the scent of him near you. It was all so comforting.
The calm silence came to an abrupt end when Charlie's phone rang. Grumbling, his long arm reached back and grabbed it, still keeping ahold of you while you gleefully rested your head on his chest.
You sensed him checking the caller ID before answering.
"Hello..." his tone was soft and friendly. Must be Nicole...
"Okay. And how did the testing go?"
"Oh good."
"Yeah. We can meet up in the morning before class like usual."
"Mhm. Vanilla latte."
"Thanks, Emily. Goodnight."
The twisting in your stomach was practically unbearable. The idea that Charlie was taking calls from some other woman, after hours, and buying her coffees was concerning for you. But by some magical change in your DNA, you didn't let this topic marinate forever but you also didn't jump to conclusions, or accuse him of cheating while throwing your suitcase at him.
Nope. Not this time.
Because this time, no matter what the hell was going on in Charlie's life when you weren't around, you knew deep down in your being that you didn't have to put up with someone who wasn't as committed as you were. Maybe it was Paris, all that European air still pumping through your blood that made you love yourself more than loving someone whose devotion wasn't clear.
I only choose people who choose me back.
Quin's motto came to mind.
Calmly, you sat up, leaning your back against the headboard to begin a new strategy of adulting in this relationship.
"Charlie? Can I ask some questions about Emily?"
You sounded like a person ready to negotiate a business deal. But it caught Charlie's attention and he sat up to match your posture.
"Okay." He almost looked amused as he turned to look at you.
Dick.
"The two of you seem close."
You played with the hem of the sheet wrapped around your naked body, finding it difficult to meet his eye.
"Is that a question?" He dipped his chin down.
Your inner monologue was shouting at you to look at him so you finally pulled your gaze from the duvet to him.
"Is there anything going with you guys? Anything I should know about?"
You held your breath, waiting for god knows what. At least you were done with the miscommunications. If the bandaid was going to be ripped off, it needed to be quick.
He huffed, trying not to get upset.
"Of course not."
A clear, concise three worded answer. But it wasn't good enough.
"Would you like there to be?"
His eyes narrowed as if he was trying to figure out what was behind your line of questioning.
"Where's this coming from?"
Sighing, you twisted your body to face him.
"This is me...in a long-distance relationship. Ensuring that there isn't anything or anyone causing you to think twice about us."
Charlie's eyes softened on you, he reached for your hand but stayed silent. You wondered what was going through his mind.
"Charlie, listen. I'm not trying to argue or find reasons to be jealous. I think it's important that we are checking in with each other like this, y'know? If there are any doubts or you feel a certain way about someone else... honestly, I'd rather you tell me so we can talk about it openly."
Look at you with your big girl pants on. You were even surprising yourself at this point. But it was the truth, which is why it came flowing out of you so easily. Would it hurt to learn that Charlie was fantasizing about banging his assistant? Of course it would.
But cheating and lying hurt worse, and you knew that painful reality from experience. So it was time to try a new angle and rethink the whole foundation of what a healthy relationship should look like.
"I don't want anyone else. I promise."
His words seemed authentic and you wanted to believe him. Unfortunately, Charlie had lied enough to you before that it was difficult to take anything he promised to heart.
You offered him a kind smile before standing up and slipping on his light blue button-down.
"Okay."
Meandering over to his wooden dresser, you took notice of two framed pictures. One was of Charlie reading to Henry - the exact one you took of them and mailed the copy of to Charlie. Plenty of bad memories riddled the events surrounding that photo but at least he kept it. The other framed picture was foreign even though the face in it was not.
It was of you. A candid picture that was taken on the opening night of your play. The play that Charlie directed and you starred in. The play that brought you two together. It seemed like ages ago.
Your hand reached for it, picking it up to study the angle, your humble yet prideful smile, the background. You were gathered with your other castmates at the forefront of the stage, taking your bows, waving, and showing your gratitude for the standing ovation. It was a special moment that was still burned into your soul, the excitement in your chest, the satisfaction of all your hardwork paying off, a pure moment of joy that you'd never forget - and Charlie captured it without you even knowing.
A small sting behind your eyes crept in and you smiled at it, warmth surrounding your chest. Turning around, you held up the frame.
"I didn't know you took this."
Charlie was still sitting against the headboard, watching you discover the sweet moment he had captured of you with his phone. Snapped, printed, and framed.
"It was a great night. Well, despite your ex being incredibly ill-mannered."
He was referring to Ben cheating on you, fucking your castmate during the after-party, and not indulging your desire to celebrate as you wanted. You had almost forgotten until he brought it up.
Looking back down at the picture, you admired the state of total happiness you were in. Acting really brought out that bright, cheerful side of you that nothing else seemed to. You could only imagine how finishing the film in Paris and attending the premiere was going to feel.
You put the frame back down to rest on the dresser, Charlie's wrist watch laying next to it along with his embroidered handkerchief.
C.B.
Letting your fingers glide along the steel watch and soft fabric, you tried to take in just how beautiful it felt to be in his life this way. Your portrait next to him and Henry which overlooked where he slept every night without you.
It seemed silly at the moment to second guess his devotion.
"So...Can I attend your lecture tomorrow morning, then?"
Your voice turned seductive as you wiggled your hips, modestly covered by the long length of his shirt that was draped over you.
"...Professor..."
He couldn't hide the sheepish smile on his face at your little show.
"I don't know. Did you finish your assignment?"
He played along, curling his back to crawl across the bed to you.
You feigned shocked innocence.
"I didn't know we had one. Can I make it up? Maybe do some extra credit..."
The button-up shirt drops to your ankles just as his sturdy arms wrap around your waist.
______________
Morning came too quickly as you and Charlie hardly slept.
During the coffee run, you rolled your eyes when Emily's order came after yours.
"Blueberry muffin, too. Please."
You leaned over Charlie's tall stature to speak your additional request to the barista.
"Make that two."
He smiled down at you as you smiled up at him.
"Or three...actually"
For fuck's sake. At this point, it wasn't even the fact Charlie was being considerate of his TA, but more so that you haven't even met this Emily girl yet. You hated that you even felt anxious over her presence around Charlie without even knowing her. She was probably harmless, nothing like Isabel, who just wanted to pass his damn class.
You reluctantly carried Emily's vanilla latte along with your mocha as Charlie carried the muffins, his coffee, and a stack of documents. Still, he was able to open every door for you which you thanked him for each time.
"Thank you, again."
"Of course, again."
Once past the threshold of his classroom door, you spotted her right away, sitting in the front row hunched over a stack of papers that she was sorting through. Her head pops up and she pushed the nose of her oversized glasses up to see better.
She smiles, a pep to her step as she sees not only Charlie but you as well.
"O-Oh! Hi! Here let me help..."
She goes to Charlie first, taking the documents from his hold.
"Thanks. Emily this is..."
You interrupted and introduce yourself by name followed by "Charlie's girlfriend" as you hand her the vanilla latte. Despite your tone being calm and your body language appearing friendly, Charlie knew exactly what you were doing as he gave you a pointed look.
Marking your territory.
"Oh.. hello...uh- thank you...nice to meet you..." Emily takes the latte, bringing it up to her plush, pink lips to test the temperature before sipping. You gave her a once over, quickly, noting her well-maintained blonde hair, blue eyes, NASA t-shirt, and tight black jeans. An oversized, chunky cardigan slung haphazardly over her shoulders and her clear framed glasses made her look somewhat studious in a...I'm-a-blonde-bombshell-under-all-this-nerd-stuff, kind of way.
"I didn't realize he was dating anyone. He's so private."
Then she said that. Knife through your heart.
You offered a faux giggle, giving Charlie a playful nudge to the bicep, and played up the best performance of your life. He winced, not at the nudge, but at his own failure to mention you to Emily.
"He IS private! It's so annoying. But, we got past it and now it's one of those things I really love about him, y'know." You curled your arm around his. "My mysterious guy. Full of surprises."
Your tone had gone from upbeat to discontent.
Emily took a sip and smiled, nodding along. "Well the two of you are very cute together. Uh- Mr. Barber, is there anything you need before we get started? I have a list of questions."
Charlie appears visibly uneasy, standing between you and Emily, he raised a finger.
"One moment, Emily. Go ahead and get seated, I'll be right back."
With that, his hand settles on your shoulder.
"Let's step out."
He could see the annoyance behind your eyes, you didn't even have to tell him what was wrong, he knew.
Silently you strutted to the hall, Charlie closing the door to give you both privacy.
His hands hover over your shoulders in a consolatory way.
"Look, I didn't mention you because I don't speak about my personal life with my students. It's about creating boundaries..."
You crossed your arms and tried your best to understand his point of view because that's how adults work through their problems, right? Right?!
"You gave her your cell phone number, and you have hers. You buy her coffee."
"Okay, I know..."
"She called you right after we had sex, Charlie...and you answered!"
The slight rise in the volume of your voice caused an echo down the mostly empty hallway.
His hand hangs near your mouth, a caution to keep quiet.
"It's strictly class-related communications. I would never..."
You interrupt him for the second time.
"You would never what? Fuck someone you're working with? Take advantage of your power?"
Your words came out harsher than you intended but they were true. It's how you and Charlie met. It's how Charlie met his ex-wife.
"That's not fair."
You rake a hand over your face, resting your palm against your mouth to physically stop yourself from saying anything else.
"Let's finish this after I'm done here, okay? We can talk at home."
Home.
At least you were an obvious part of his life there.
For the next 90 minutes, you watched Charlie do what he does best: engage an audience.
You tried to focus on his lecture, the words he was saying and the lessons he was teaching but it all ended up as static noise in your head while you replayed your dramatic history with him. Even with Isabel and James out of the picture, and your ability to love each other openly, the two of you still found things to argue over. Would it always be this way? Would you and Charlie ever just be happy together?
The ride home was quiet as was the air in the kitchen as Charlie prepared dinner. Pouring yourself a glass of wine, you poked around the living room. It was almost identical to his New York home, with the same books on the bookshelf, the same decor, and framed pictures of Henry's art.
You settled into the sofa, pulling a throw blanket off the back and resting it across your lap. Closing your eyes, you took a long inhale, letting your sensory nerves capture the smell, the warmth, the sounds of Charlie's LA home. For a moment, you pretended you didn't have to go back to Paris. You pretended this was your life, Charlie was your husband, and tonight was a typical Saturday night. You sat with that fantasy for a moment then asked yourself: does this make me happy?
"Dinner's ready."
His voice broke your sightless concentration, your eyes batting open to see him standing above you.
"Oh, okay. It smells good..." you stop when he moves closer.
He kneels down to your level, his hands resting on top of yours in your lap.
"I love you."
This random admission seemed like a way to smooth everything over and start fresh. To avoid getting too deep into a discussion that could derail and conclude with you leaving for Paris tonight instead of the early morning.
"I love you, too. But I have to be honest. I'm not sure I totally trust you."
His gaze lowers, appearing defeated. You felt bad but you needed to be truthful about your feelings and doubts. You hoped he could do the same.
"Am I going to pay for my past mistakes for the rest of my life?"
His question hangs in the space between you, feeling much heavier than the topic at hand. Was he referring to his entire past?
"No, that's not what I-"
"Don't do this, please."
You can feel his desperation, his hands gripping the top of your thighs. Head still hanging low, you hear a slight sniffle.
Was he crying?
You place a comforting hand on his broad shoulder and squeeze.
"Charlie, it's okay."
His hand leaves your lap and embraces your hand on his shoulder, seeking connection. Seemingly ashamed of his past and present choices, he does not look up.
In an attempt to combat the demons he was fighting, you cupped his face, pulling his gaze to yours.
His face was flushed, eyes red and wet. The pads of your thumbs wiped away any tears.
"I want to trust you. I want to move past all these insecurities and have a future with you, Charlie. I just need time. Once I'm finished filming and can come back here, it will get better."
He pulls your wrist to his lips and kisses it.
"I'll do whatever it takes to help facilitate more trust. If you need anything, please ask."
His submissiveness made you smile and you kissed his forehead much as he does to you.
"Maybe I'll put together a little list of things we can try but for now... let's eat, yeah?"