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Best Laid Plans

Summary:

Jingyi is going to stop Hanguang-Jun from fighting even if it kills him- and he knows just the people to help him.

“We need to stage an intervention,” he says to his friends at the next night hunt, apropos of nothing.

“In what sense?” asks Sizhui at the same time as Jin Ling pipes up with “an inter-what?” 

OR: LWJ is pregnant and everyone is losing their damn minds, but what else is new?

Notes:

I'm sorry this isn't another chapter of my WIP, but I wrote most of this ages ago and decided to finish it up and post it. Also I feel like some fluff wouldn't go astray right now.

By the way, it seems like there’s some confusion about how bonding works in this ‘verse so I thought I’d clear some things up:

- Bonding is done to maintain balance between yin (alphas) and yang (omegas) and to create stronger fighting units
- Bonded pairs are forbidden from having sex or getting married because it is believed this will cause their bonds to become impure
- Familial bonds, such as those between siblings, are pretty common because of this reason
- Traditionally, only alphas and omegas become cultivators, but this has been slowly changing since LWJ invented lone cultivation
- Most alphas and omegas marry beta women
- Some alphas get married to other alphas and some omegas get married to other omegas. This is completely normal and accepted.
- What’s NOT normal and accepted is alphas getting married to their bonded omegas
- The only reason LWJ and WWX were able to get away with it was because LXC was able to get NHS on side pretty quickly
- The two of them had to scheme pretty hard to avoid a sect war though

Hope this makes sense!

Work Text:

Jingyi has a problem. A very big problem. A six-foot tall problem, in fact. 

That problem’s name is Hanguang-Jun, and he is currently fighting seventeen puppets at once, his sword slicing gracefully through the air and yang energy surrounding him in a softly glowing shield.

Two months ago, this wouldn’t have been an issue. Hanguang-Jun is a highly skilled fighter, probably second only to Zewu-Jun, though Zewu-Jun rarely has cause to demonstrate his skills. But circumstances have changed. Hanguang-Jun has changed. 

It’s none of his business. Hanguang-Jun is an adult and can take care of himself. Except he clearly can’t, because at the moment he’s demonstrating far too many acrobatic fighting moves to be healthy for someone in his… condition.  

Jingyi marches up to Senior Wei, who’s watching Hanguang-Jun with an expression of intermingled lust and admiration. He considers kicking him for being so openly shameless, but Hanguang-Jun would be sad, and sadness might be bad for the baby, for all he knows.  

“Stop looking at him like you want to eat him,” he snaps. “It’s gross.” 

“Ah, Jingyi,” says Senior Wei, shaking his head. “You’ve never been in love before, so you don’t know what it’s like. One day, you’ll find someone who looks at you like they want to eat you, and you’ll understand.” 

Jingyi makes a disgusted face and almost kicks him anyway.  

“Why aren’t you fighting with him?” he says sourly.  

“No need,” Senior Wei says with a dismissive wave. “He’s got this one.”  

Fifty feet ahead of them, Hanguang-Jun performs a perfectly executed high kick. Jingyi winces. 

“Aren’t you worried he’ll get hurt?” 

“Why would I be worried?” Senior Wei says, surprised. “He’s a stronger cultivator than I am.”

“I know that,” Jingyi says, scowling. “But he’s… he’s…” 

He can’t bring himself to say it. 

“He’s?” 

Jingyi throws his hands in the air.  

“Figure it out for yourself!” he yells, storming off. 


Except Senior Wei doesn’t figure it out for himself.  

Jingyi isn’t surprised- Senior Wei is an idiot. He’ll never understand what Hanguang-Jun sees in him. Hanguang-Jun could have literally anyone he wanted, and instead he chose some backwater alpha without even a minor sect leadership to his name. But he and Senior Wei have a soul bond, and they’ve been, like, stupidly in love with each other for two decades. Well, at least Hanguang-Jun has. Senior Wei was dead for most of that time and wasn’t able to be stupidly in love with anybody.  

Hanguang-Jun and Senior Wei officially announced their marriage a week ago, after what Jingyi can only assume was months of careful behind-the-scenes political machinations on Zewu-Jun’s part. All the sect leaders- well, the important ones anyway- were invited to Cloud Recesses for the announcement, and a lavish banquet was provided to help keep tempers in check. The Jiang, Nie and Jin sect leaders each wore a sash of red silk in an open display of support and presented the new couple with wedding gifts.

In the end, no one voiced a single objection. The minor sect leaders, seeing such obvious solidarity between the four main sects, quickly fell into line and offered Hanguang-Jun and Senior Wei their congratulations.

There was some grumbling over the fact that Hanguang-Jun was clearly pregnant and not even trying to hide it, but no-one was actually brave enough to say anything to his face- which was just as well, because they would have gotten bitch slapped, and Zewu-Jun would have given whoever was responsible one of his trademark Disappointed Looks.

Hanguang-Jun’s pregnancy is a Big Deal. He’s the first pregnant omega at Cloud Recesses in almost four hundred years- Jingyi knows, he looked it up- and on top of that, he’s pregnant with his alpha’s baby, which is a big no-no in the cultivation world.

No-one at Cloud Recesses knows how to deal with him. Senior Wei follows him around with a look of pitiful yearning on his face at all times, sighing audibly and making everyone, especially Sizhui, completely miserable. Meanwhile Jingyi has to deal with intrusive thoughts that tell him Hanguang-Jun would really appreciate it if he gave him his lunch or walked along behind him with his sword drawn or, stupidest of all, braided his damn hair.

He’s not the only one, either. All of the disciples look at Hanguang-Jun with expressions ranging from worry to confused lust, except for Sizhui, who constantly looks like he wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole.

Suffice to say, no-one is exactly operating at one hundred percent right now. Well, there is Doctor Wen, who manages to maintain a no-nonsense attitude and impersonal detachment despite him smelling like that, but she seems to be the only one. Everyone else is literally dying.

It doesn’t help that Hanguang-Jun won’t let himself be protected. He insists on going about his business like nothing has changed, not even letting himself be carried from place to place or guarded at all times or anything. It’s actual torture.

Jingyi is going to change that though. He’s going to stop Hanguang-Jun from fighting even if it kills him- and he knows just the people to help him.

“We need to stage an intervention,” he says to his friends at the next night hunt, apropos of nothing.

“In what sense?” asks Sizhui at the same time as Jin Ling pipes up with “an inter-what?” 

“An intervention, dumbass,” Jingyi says, crossing his arms and glaring at him.

Jin Ling’s scent rubs him up the wrong way on a good day, but for some reason it’s really fucking annoying him right now. It makes him want to punch something, but it also makes him hot for some reason. Hot with rage, probably.

“Don’t call me a dumbass, dumbass,” Jin Ling says, puffing his chest out like an angry rooster.

“Guys, can’t you just go one day without fighting?” Zizhen says, exasperated. 

“No!” Jingyi and Jin Ling say simultaneously. 

“Jingyi,” says Sizhui patiently. “Perhaps you should explain what you mean.” 

“We need to get Hanguang-Jun to stop fighting,” says Jingyi.  

“But why?” says Zizhen, confused. “He’s really good at it.” 

“Because… he’s… he’s…” Jingyi makes a vague gesture at his own stomach.  

“He’s what?” 

“You know,” Jingyi says, repeating the gesture. 

“He’s hungry?” says Zizhen, his brow furrowing in confusion. “Why would that stop him from fighting?” 

Jignyi makes a frustrated sound. “Not hungry. Something else.” 

“Thirsty?” 

“No!” Jingyi cries. 

“Sorry Jingyi,” Zizhen says, “I really don’t know what you’re talking about.” 

“He means he’s knocked up,” says Jin Ling bluntly.

Sizhui makes a strangled sound and goes a bit green.

“What’s wrong, Sizhui?” says Zizhen fretfully. “Are you sick?” 

“Nope,” says Jin Ling, cackling. 

“Face it, Sizhui,” says Jingyi, sighing. “They had sex. You’re going to have to come to terms with it one day.” 

That makes Sizhui go even more green, if possible. He looks at Jingyi like he just told him his favourite rabbit died.

“Who had sex?” Zizhen asks curiously. 

“Hanguang-Jun and Uncle Wei,” says Jin Ling, smirking. 

“I mean, yeah,” says Zizhen. “I would have thought that was obvious? They’re married, and if Hanguang-Jun is preg-” 

“Don’t say it!” Sizhui gasps, doubling over and actually looking like he’s about to throw up. 

“Why does it bother you so much anyway?” says Jin Ling, rolling his eyes. “They’re not even your real parents.” 

“You take that back,” Jingyi says angrily, “or I’ll sneak into your house and cut all your hair off while you sleep.” 

“You wouldn’t dare.” 

“Try me, bitch.” 

“No swearing,” says Sizhui, muffled. 

“Sorry,” Jingyi mutters.

“Apology accepted,” Jin Ling says, grinning.

Annnnnd now he’s mad again.

“I wasn’t talking to you, asshole!” he yells, drawing his sword, which he never does. Usually he just tries to beat Jin Ling over the head with it.

Jingyi,” Sizhui says, shocked.

“Sorry,” Jingyi says, slowly sheathing his sword again with a guilty expression.

“This is what I get for choosing to be part of a friendship group with two alphas in it,” Zizhen says despairingly.

“Hey, screw you, you stupid beta!” Jin Ling cries.

Jin Ling,” says Sizhui, glaring at his friend. “Apologise to Zizhen. Right now.”

“Sorry,” says Jin Ling, shrinking in on himself.

Sizhui is scary when he gets mad- it doesn’t happen often, but when it does, you’d better hope you’re not the one he’s mad at. 

“It’s okay,” says Zizhen with a forced laugh, trying to diffuse the situation. “I know I’m just a stupid beta.”

“Zizhen, no,” says Sizhui, his expression softening. “You have just as much right to be a cultivator as any of us. You’re not worth less just because you’re a beta, no matter what anyone tells you.”

“Yeah, and if anyone says otherwise we’ll beak their kneecaps,” says Jingyi savagely.

He actually would, too. It’s not an idle threat.

“I really am sorry, Zizhen,” Jin Ling says in a small voice. 

“It’s okay,” Zizhen says.

“Anyway,” Jingyi says, “back to what I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted-“

“No one interrupted you. You spent a full minute trying and failing to say the word pregnant until I put you out of your misery.”

Huuuurk.”

“Jin Ling,” Zizhen says anxiously, “shut up, you’re actually going to make him throw up.”

“ANYWAY,” Jingyi says, “The point is we have to get Hanguang-Jun to stop fighting.”

“But how?” Says Jin Ling. “Do we, like, kidnap him and hold him hostage for nine months or something?”

“What- no,” says Jingyi, horrified. “What is wrong with you?”

“Sorry, I’m just brainstorming.”

“Brainstorm less stupidly please.”

“Can’t we just talk to him?” Zizhen says reasonably.

“Sure,” Jingyi says, rolling his eyes. “You want to tell Hanguang-Jun to his face that you think he should stop fighting because he’s in the family way, be my guest.”

“On second thoughts,” says Zizhen hastily, “maybe not.”

“Hang on,” Jingyi says, snapping his fingers in Jin Ling’s direction, “Senior Wei is your uncle.”

“Uh, yeah?” Says Jin Ling. “Please tell me you didn’t just realise that. Oh my god, did you just realise that?”

“Shut up and let me finish,” snaps Jingyi. “You should convince him to get Hanguang-Jun to stop fighting.”

“Why me? You do it.”

“I tried- didn’t go so well. Besides, you’re the only one of us besides Zizhen who can say you-know-what.”

“Get him to do it then.”

“Hey, leave me out of this. He’s not my uncle.”

“Okay, well, what about Sizhui?”

“Yeah, nope, that’s not going to happen,” Jingyi says. “Not unless you want him to throw up all over his parents.”

“Actually, I wou-“

“For fu- frick’s sake, Jin Ling, just talk to your stupid uncle so we can all move on with our lives!”

“Argh, fine! Although I don’t even know why I should even bother. Who cares about some stupid baby?”

“That’s your cousin you’re talking about, you piece of shi-“

“Jingyi!”

“-take mushroom!”


“Well?” he growls as soon as Jin Ling gets back from talking to Senior Wei.

“Well what?” Jin Ling says.

“Don’t ‘well what’ me, how did it go with Senior Wei?”

A harrowed look passes over Jin Ling’s face.

“I couldn’t do it,” he says, shuddering. “I tried, but I couldn’t get the words out. He patted me on the head and told me to come and find him when I was ready. It was awful.

“Zizhen, you may have to do it after all.”

“Nononono,” Zizhen says hastily. “Do not make me say the word pregnant in front of Senior Wei, I would literally die.”

I’m going to literally die if you keep saying it in front of me,” Sizhui moans.

“Well this is just great,” says Jingyi grumpily. “What are we supposed to do now? Two of us can’t say it, one of us refuses to say it, and the other one can’t even hear it without turning green.”

“Could we steal his sword,” says Zizhen slowly, “and, like, hide it or something?”

“I’m sorry, did I hear you correctly?” says Jingyi incredulously. “Did you say you wanted to steal Hanguang-Jun’s sword?”

“Yeah!”

“The sword he carries on him at all times?”

“Uh… yes?”

“And can literally summon at will?

“Ah,” says Zizhen. “Maybe not then.”

Jingyi suddenly has a brainwave.

“Zewu-Jun!” he exclaims. “We should ask Zewu-Jun! He’d literally die before he let Hanguang-Jun get hurt.”

“Yeah, but that doesn’t help with the whole not being able to say you-know-what though,” Jin Ling points out.

“That’s fine,” Jingyi says dismissively. “Zewu-Jun understands subtlety, unlike Senior Wei. He’ll know what we’re talking about.”

“Okay,” says Zizhen. “Yeah! Let’s do it!”

Jingyi spends the rest of the night hunt staring at Hanguang-Jun’s shiny black hair and daydreaming about what it would feel like sliding through his fingers, and he’s not even mad about it. With any luck, he won’t have to worry about Hanguang-Jun at all after this, because he’ll be too busy being aggressively coddled by both Zewu-Jun and Senior Wei to have time for anything else.


Unfortunately, they don’t end up getting the chance to appeal to Zewu-Jun. A rogue unbonded alpha has been stirring up trouble in a remote village just outside of Gusu, slaughtering the villagers to create his own puppet army, so of course they get called away to investigate.

Unbonded alphas can be very dangerous. Sometimes when an alpha is born into a beta family, no one notices they’ve presented until it’s too late, and by that time they’ve already been so corrupted by yin energy that they become feral. Their souls are unbalanced, and they either have to learn to cultivate yang energy or submit to the Three-Day Test and be bonded to an omega. Sometimes, in extreme cases, they even have to have their energy channels blocked off permanently.

When they get to the village, it appears to be completely abandoned. Some of the houses have smashed-in windows and the street is caked with dark blood in places. There’s a foul stench in the air, making Jingyi scrunch up his nose in disgust. 

As they go from building to building, they see no sign of the alpha or the puppets- no sign of life at all, in fact. Jingyi wonders if they’re already too late. 

Suddenly, something darts out from one of the buildings they have yet to investigate. Hanguang-Jun whirls around, drawing his sword in one fluid motion. 

The street is silent and still. Hanguang-Jun gestures to the disciples and Senior Wei to follow him as he walks cautiously towards the building. 

Suddenly, the quiet street explodes into chaos. Puppets spill out of the buildings and congeal in an angry mob around them. There are more than Jingyi was expecting, thirty at least, probably the entire population of the village. Still, they’ve fought more than that before without any trouble. Thirty puppets should be a piece of cake.

It’s over within the hour. Senior Wei summons the Ghost General to assist them and Hunguang-Jun uses the chord assassination technique with deadly efficiency. It’s almost mesmerising, watching them move together in perfect sequence, as if they can read each other’s minds- which of course they can. 

A slender young woman steps out from one of the buildings. Her eyes are red and wild, and she has the crazed, wasted look of an alpha who has grown addicted to power, unchecked by omega temperance. Yin energy crackles around her, dark and menacing. 

“You killed all our toys,” she says, pouting. “That’s not very nice.”

Our? Jingyi thinks, confused.

That’s when the second alpha appears, grinning, his sharp teeth glinting wetly in his mouth.

“Don’t be too disappointed, jiejie,” he says, licking his lips. “You always said you wanted to see what it was like to have an omega. Why don’t we see if we can make these ones squeal for us?”

Jingyi sees red. No-one has the right to talk about omegas like that. About anyone like that. 

“Don’t you fucking speak about them that way,” he snarls.

“Awww,” the female alpha coos. “You gonna fight us, little alpha? Cute, but I’d like to see you try.”

“Omegas,” Senior Wei says tightly, not taking his eyes off the two other alphas. “Fall in behind. Everyone else, form a ring around them. Protect them.”

“But-“ Sizhui protests.

Now,” Senior Wei says in a voice that brooks no argument.

Sizhui lowers his head and obeys.

With a click of Hanguang-Jun’s fingers, a shimmering white shield forms around the omegas, encapsulating them completely.

Jingyi wants to shake him. Why isn’t he falling back with the other omegas? Why is he shielding them and not himself, when he’s the one who’s pregnant? 

“Now that’s just unfair,” says the female alpha, pouting. “Still, we like a challenge. But- ah. Should you really be fighting, little one?”

She’s talking to Hanguang-Jun, looking at him with an expression of warm concern.

“You shut your mouth,” Jingyi says angrily. “That’s Hanguang-Jun you’re talking to.”

“Oh, we know who he is,” the male alpha says, looking Hanguang-Jun up and down in a way that makes Jingyi’s skin crawl. “His reputation proceeds him.”

Senior Wei steps in front of Hanguang-Jun, narrowing his eyes.

“As fun as this is,” he says. “Can’t we just start fighting now? I’m getting bored.”

“Is he making you fight?” The female alpha says softly to Hanguang-Jun, ignoring Senior Wei completely. “I’d never make you fight, if you were mine. I’d keep you at home and take care of you like you deserve.”

“I’d rather die.”

“Hmmm,” the alpha says. “A pity. You’re a pretty little thing. Still, if you really want to die that badly…”

She draws her sword with a bright snick. “That can be arranged.”

The second alpha draws his sword as well, jerking his chin at Senior Wei with a nasty grin.

Senior Wei purses his lips, unsheathing Suibian. “You know, you two are really beginning to get on my nerves."

Jingyi watches the way the alphas work together: how each seems to know where the other will move without a single word being exchanged between them.

Eventually, he realises why.

They’re bonded. 

There’s a reason alpha-alpha fighting pairs are illegal. Yin energy is dangerous, which is why it needs to be tempered with yang energy.

If the alphas in question had both learned to cultivate yang energy, it would be different. Jingyi would bet real money that these two haven’t though.

Still, they're no match for Senior Wei and Hanguang-Jun. After a blow from Bichen makes the female alpha crumple to the ground, it seems the outcome of the battle is comfortably in their favour.

That’s when the unthinkable happens. The male alpha, screaming in rage and grief, shapes yin energy into a gleaming shard of darkness and stabs Hanguang-Jun in the stomach with it.

Jingyi has never seen anyone land a hit on Hanguang-Jun. Never. 

Seconds later, the male alpha is lying on the ground with his throat sliced open, Suibian wet with his blood. The damage, however, has been done.

Jingyi walks straight up to Senior Wei and shoves him, hard.  

“You were supposed to protect him!” he shouts, his eyes welling with tears. “How could you let him keep fighting when he’s… he’s…” 

“He’s?” 

“Pregnant!” he screams, grabbing hold of the front of Senior Wei’s robes and shaking him. “He’s pregnant, you idiot! And now he’s going to lose the baby, and it’s all your fault!”

That’s when he hears Hanguang-Jun’s deep voice behind him. “Jingyi, look at me.”  

Jingyi whimpers, closing his eyes. He can’t look. He can’t.  

“Jingyi.” 

Jingyi turns around. 

Hanguang-Jun stands before him in pristine white robes, unmarred by even a tiny smear of blood. 

“How?” he whispers. 

“Jingyi, what sort of husband do you think I am?” Senior Wei asks, looking amused and slightly offended. “I started inventing protective talismans for the baby the second I found out he was pregnant. Do you really think I’d let him keep fighting otherwise?” 

Let me?” Hanguang-Jun says, quirking an eyebrow at him. 

“Don’t look at me like that,” says Senior Wei. “It’s not like I’d lock you up in the jingshi or anything, I’d just make sure you were too… ah… occupied to put yourself in danger.” 

“Oh,” Hanguang-Jun breathes, his ears turning red. He gives Senior Wei a soft, dark-eyed look. Senior Wei licks his lips. 

Jingyi makes a revolted noise. 

Senior Wei breaks the weird tension in the air, looking down at Jingyi again. “Ah, Jingyi, sorry we worried you, but as you can see, Hanguang-Jun is fine! So don’t worry, okay?” 

He reaches over and ruffles Jingyi’s hair like he’s a small child. Jingyi glares at him, deeply offended. 

“Jingyi,” says Hanguang-Jun, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I am… touched that care so deeply about the baby and me.” 

Jingyi sniffles. “Can I have a hug?” 

Hannguang-Jun opens his arms and Jingyi steps into them, breathing in his sunlight and winter forest smell.

“Sizhui,” Hangauang-Jun calls. “Come here.”

Jingyi hears the sound of footsteps and then his nose fills with the scent of clean linen and Osmanthus blossoms as Sizhui snuggles in beside him.

“Adie," he says in a small voice. "I was scared.” 

“All right everyone, get in here,” Senior Wei yells, wrapping his arms around all three of them.

The other disciples pile in around them in a warm mass of limbs. Jingyi inhales the confusing mix of scents- chilli and sunlight and linen and ginseng and green tea- and clings to Hanguang-Jun a little bit tighter.

He still feels worried, even after learning about the talismans- according to Doctor Wen, he’s been biologically programmed to be worried- but at least now he knows Hanguang-Jun’s life isn’t in the hands of an idiot.

Well, he thinks later, watching Senior Wei get chased up a tree by a dog for the second time that day. Not a complete idiot, anyway.

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