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“Shit,” Sebastian mumbled beside him. It was a breathy whine of defeat that Eggsy felt in his chest. His voice was muffled by a pillow, as he cursed under his breath, head buried likely in hopes to get some sleep that seemed so far away these days. Eggsy reached out to smooth fingers through dark, unruly curls that hadn’t been styled in the last three weeks.
There was a moment of quiet, that was uncommon in their usually calm and silent household, before another squawk resonated through the monitor and was followed by a loud, not so feeble wail that broke both their hearts.
“No.” Eggsy cautioned with firm lips to his temple, halting Sebastian’s weak movements to get up and soothe the distressed sound coming from the room just a door over. “I’ll go.” He slipped out much easier than Sebastian’s attempt. Eggsy didn’t blame him; Sebastian ran on two to three hours of broken sleep and caffeine these days.
“Eggsy.” Sebastian did manage to hold him down for a moment, even in his sleep deprived state he was strong, to trap his mouth in a gratitude filled kiss. “I love you.”
Eggsy smiled into his lips. “I love you too, baby. Now rest, yeah.” He patted an exposed butt cheek before he tucked the duvet securely around Sebastian, and eased out.
The trip wasn't long, just ten short steps, to the source of all the noise and chaos that’s turned their lives upside down, yet changed it in a way Eggsy never wanted to come back from. He slipped through her door--it was colored in a soft yellow with her name painted in pristine cursive, and littered with delicate wild flowers--and stepped into a magical and serene space.
“Oh, my sweetling.” He whispered down into the butternut wood finished crib; it was nestled against a wall, painted with a Secret Garden themed mural.
Inside held his whole heart, his entire reason for being, and what a new and intense feeling that was. Her little arms and legs were swathed in a floral print swattler, and despite her earlier feeding and cuddle from Sebastian, she cried her little heart out. Her face was reddened and angry with displeasure, as her arms worked to break through the confines that were meant to bring her comfort.
“Shhh.” Eggsy lifted her out, cradling her body like she was as precious as the Queen’s jewels, and brought her to his chest to rest against his heart. “You just had a bottle." The reminder didn't seem to quell her troubled cries, and if by some miracle, intensified them.
It was why Sebastian was so exhausted; his husband was insistent he did most of the night feedings, leaving Eggsy to help care for her during the day. The argument he was perfectly capable, and up for the task of midnight feedings, was lost on him months before Elleanor’s arrival. But that didn’t stop Eggsy from early mornings, where Elleanor woke long before Sebastian should function, and steal her away for a cuddle on the sofa; Eggsy often kipped with her, getting himself caught by Sebastian hours later.
“Daddy is tired, my Ellie.” He had her secure in one arm and turned the monitor off, knowing Sebastian would likely get up and pry their daughter from him.
For someone who convinced Eggsy he wasn’t too old, and in fact would be a model father despite his lack of a father for decades, Sebastian sure tried to take over most of the parental duties. Eggsy often wondered if it were for the consistent talks, topics of children that were brought up short of his acceptance to take Arthur, and not so subtle hints of a baby; he wouldn’t have done anything if he weren't sure. And as he held his little girl, Eggsy never felt more sure about anything.
“We should give him a few more hours of sleep, hm?” She stared up at him with blue eyes, still that new and fresh color newborns possessed, that slowly began to take a shade favoring Eggsy. Her teeny, tiny brow furrowed a bit in bewilderment, before turning curious momentarily; he swore it was in deliberate consideration. He beamed down at her. “That’s Papa’s girl, yeah?” Eggsy pecked her plump, rosie cheek.
He waltzed around the room, humming nothing in particular, in anticipation to lull her back into sleep, adding a rock to his hips. It was an oddly easy rhythm he fell into, feeling as if he’d done this his whole life, and soon put her into some sort of unconscious state. With a prayer up to God, Eggsy lowered her back against the mattress with a final kiss, and wished for sweet dreams to find her, as he turned the monitor back on; he wasn’t even out the door before she began to fuss and squall again.
“Oh, baby girl.” Eggsy half moaned, half crooned, as he collected her back against his heart and bounced around. “Do you need another bottle? Daddy said you were eating a bit more.” Eggsy wandered out, keeping the same rhythm to quell her distress, and into the kitchen where Delilah peered up from her bed.
“I know. She’s fussy tonight.” The canine tipped her head for a moment before she lowered it back to her paws, but kept a watchful eye on Eggsy and Elleanor as he prepared a bottle.
“I’ll see you in the morning,” he whispered to his pup on his way out. “But right now you need me, don’t you pretty girl.” Elleanor’s tiny, pink bowed lips opened enough to let a small squeak out before Eggsy offered her the bottle. She took the nipple and began to nurse on it like she hadn’t just eaten an hour ago.
“Are you growing?” He settled into a plush, sage green glider kitty-cornered beside a bookcase, full of stories they were gifted at Elleanor’s baby shower, and pushed off with a slippered foot to rock them.
She seemed to finish her formula in record time, and even though Eggsy hummed and she was full, burped and clearly content in his arms, sleep was not even remotely close. Her eyes were wide, staring up at him like he held the world; it enticed such a warmth, such a sense of loyalty Eggsy never imagined.
“Not tired, huh?” Eggsy’s palm tapped her tiny bum in both to comfort, and assess for a nappy change; it wasn’t squishy and still crinkled against his hand. “And not wet,” he sighed, wondering what could be keeping her awake. “Did you just want to see Papa?” She hiccupped in answer. “No?” Her lips spread in a little crooked grin--that Eggsy knew was just from gas--that caused his heart to expand, in a way he was sure it’d bust from his chest.
“Well.” He brought a leg up over the other, getting more comfortable, and tickled beneath her chin. “I guess we can hangout a bit, yeah? Even if it’s not for your old man.” Her lips twitched up again; Eggsy would swear on his life it was because his girl thought he was funny.
The room fell silent for a moment, the only noise was Eggsy’s soft voice, murmuring a tune she’s heard since the day she was born. Yet her eyes remained glued to his face, making it clear to Eggsy she was not tired.
“Singing ain’t working for you, is it?” A loud exhale escaped him as he changed positions, hooking his foot around the base of the ottoman and drag it closer to prop his feet, and draped them in a throw Merlin knit for her. “How about a story?” She seemed unamused to start. “One you haven’t heard? Perhaps about your Daddy and I?” Her eyes widened a fraction. She were smart, capable and aware enough to understand him; Eggsy believed that even as she farted in his hand.
“Once Upon A Time, there was a Scottish Prince named Sebastian.” He lowered his voice, adding a soft, gentle tone to each word in hopes she’d sleep. “He was kind, caring and beautiful.” Eggsy had a wistful smile. “And a little naive.” He laughed. “One day through the Prince’s journey home, after a long day at work, he stumbled upon a pub, fancying himself a pint--you won't know anything about those for a long time--where he met a hard, old grumpy man named Gary.”
Elleanor’s eyelids started to droop.
“Who was tainted by his work and life, and by some form of magic the Prince found him charming. Even if his spark had diminished, but you see...the Prince shined enough for them both.” Eggsy’s heart grew fond, remembering how pure and wonderful his husband was then, and still was to this day. “The old man didn’t believe in love, didn’t think he was worthy for all he’d done in the world, for his past taught him there was little hope.” He clutched her tiny form closer, knowing he held something special. “But the Prince was persistent, and believed they could love and could work despite odds.”
Her tiny snores began to fill the room, but Eggsy pressed on, caught in his own story telling.
Eggsy quietly sighed. “And the old man did fall in love, and remembered what it was like to laugh, to be happy…” he trailed off, suddenly overcome by emotion, and gathered himself enough to finish. “The Prince saved him from himself and taught him how to live again.” Eggsy gazed down with wet eyes, his chest warm and full of love for the little human in his arms. “And they married,” he whispered, swiping his thumb down her cheek. “They thought they lived happily ever after.” Eggsy stood with her, his movements purposefully careful and slow, to put her back to bed. “But there was just a little, tiny, wonderful piece missing.”
She snuffled around the dummy he gave her.
“Her name is Elleanor Grace Unwin. Even if it took some convincing on the Prince’s part, the old man agreed--” he chuckled to himself as tears ran freely down his face, “--and what a foolish man he was, because he couldn’t have asked for anything more perfect than their Princess.” Eggsy leaned in over the rail to kiss her small nose. “Then, they lived Happily Ever After.”
Eggsy wiped moisture off his face, watching Ellie sleep, while he waited a bit before it was safe to make his exit. He felt proud she stayed asleep as he crawled into bed, and pulled Sebastian to his chest, dropping a few tender kisses behind his ear.
He was close to sleeping himself, when Sebastian softly murmured, “You aren’t a grumpy old man,” making it evident Eggsy hadn’t turned the monitor off the second time. Eggsy grinned, nosing Sebastian’s warm, stubbled cheek. “You are a kind, loving and caring old man...Ow!” Sebastian howled against the pinch to his arse.
“Cheeky," Eggsy mumbled fondly.
Sebastian took his hand, guiding it up to his mouth, to plant a delicate kiss on his palm. “My old man. My husband. Our daughter’s father. I love you.”
“I love you, too.”