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Stacie and Beca each had a guinea pig and were frantically massaging their fur with a pet conditioner. “Why isn’t it coming out, Stacie? I thought you were the grooming expert.” Beca was borderline panicking.
“I don’t exactly have animals come to me with honey in their hair, Becs. Relax. I read that this will work.” Stacie chuckled at her best friend. “Remind me again why we can’t just let them lick it off themselves?”
“Ahhhh, Chloe.” Beca was off in her own world. “Chloe is going to kill me,” she muttered.
Stacie tried to reason with her friend. “Just tell her what happened. It’s only honey.”
“No!” Beca furiously continued to wash Major. “They weren’t supposed to be eating honey in the first place because it’s so sugary. Well, and this.” She pointed to their fur. “It’s sticky.” Stacie chuckled. “What? Major wanted some. But ladies first. I had a tiny spoon and gave Bea a small lick. When I went to give Major lick, Bea went all apeshit and shoved him aside. A scuffle ensued. And there you have it.” The DJ pointed to the honey jar that was only half full at this point.
Stacie was trying her best to hold back her chortles. “They ate that much?”
“No, Bea spilled that much. I grabbed them up and put them in their cage. That’s how they got shavings all stuck to them. Then I called you. And here we are.”
“Honey, I’m home!” Chloe stuck her head in the now open door as she struggled to get her key out.
“Honey,” Stacie smirked as she punched Beca’s arm.
“Oh, hi, Stacie.” Chloe put down the grocery bags she was carrying and walked over to the sink. “Bath time?”
“Something like that,” Beca mumbled. She meekly reached over and kissed her girlfriend.
Chloe wandered over to the table and saw a bag of apples, a box full of small, decorative honey jars, and a stack of cards. Then she saw the half-full jar of honey on the island. Her eyes flitted between Bea and Major, who were in the sink and the partially full jar of honey. “What’s going on here, Beca?”
“Ummm, conditioning their hair?” Beca squeaked. When Chloe gave her an exasperated “I-don’t-believe-you” look, Beca came clean and told her about the honey incident.
“You know that’s too much sugar for them.”
“Major wanted some,” Beca whined. Chloe knew she couldn’t resist her Emotional Support Guinea Pig. “I gave Bea a tiny lick first. Then she bulldozed Major over trying to get more, and chaos ensued.” Beca held her head in her hands before running her fingers through her hair.
Chloe could tell Beca was about to spiral into one of her anxiety attacks, so she didn’t press the issue. “How about I help clean up?” She and Beca gave the guinea pig cage a thorough cleaning with fresh shavings and made sure the island wasn’t sticky anymore while Stacie finished up with the hogs.
“Softest fur in the city!” Stacie kissed each hog on the head before placing them into their cage. “Later, ladies and pigs.” She grabbed an apple on her way out the door.
“We were almost home-free, Chloe. You would have never known. Please don’t be angry.” Beca scooted her chair closer to Chloe’s.
Chloe assured her she wasn’t upset then turned her attention to the things sitting on the table. Picking up one of the blank cards, she asked Beca what she was doing.
“I’m filling out my New Year’s cards for the ladies that cook at the center, my old Hebrew teacher, the guy at the kosher grocery store, people who I have a lot of contact within the community.”
Chloe tilted her head in confusion. “Ummm, Beca. New Year isn’t until December. We are only in September.”
Chuckling, Beca went to the refrigerator and poured them both a glass of tea. “Get comfortable, babe. It’s another one of those stories, and yes, there’s food involved.”
Beca explained how Rosh Hashanah was in a few days. Chloe excitedly clapped her hands. “Decorations!” She did a fist pump.
“Hold your horses,” Beca laughed. “It’s not that kind of holiday.” She explained Rosh Hashanah was the celebration of the Jewish New Year, the birthday of the universe, the day God created Adam and Eve.
“It is the first of what we call the High Holidays, or High Holy Days, a ten-day period that ends with Yom Kippur—the holiest day of the Jewish year. On Rosh Hashanah, Jews from all over the world celebrate God's creation of the world. Because we are celebrating the Jewish New Year, it’s happy. Two of the foods involved are apples with honey for luck.” Beca motioned to the bag of apples and boxes of jars of honey.
Beca got a knife from the kitchen and quartered one of the small apples. She also brought the partially full honey jar. Beca explained the tradition of dipping honey dating back hundreds of years. “I also make a mean honey baked apple.” The couple sat and enjoyed their honey-dipped apple slices while Beca continued to talk.
“The second night of Rosh Hashanah is time to enjoy the “new fruit,” or seasonal produce that one hasn’t eaten yet this season. The fruit symbolizes gratefulness for being alive and allowing us to taste all the delicious fruit the world offers. The most typical new fruit is the pomegranate for its biblical significance - the Land of Israel was known for its pomegranates, and it’s one of the “seven species” of Israel. The Jewish people revere the pomegranate for its abundant seeds. It’s hoped that good deeds and actions will be just as copious!” Chloe could tell that Beca knew her traditions well as the words came easy for her.
The brunette continued to explain the significance of challah bread, honey cake, (my Bubbe’s recipe is the best), couscous, dates, etc. “Each Rosh Hashanah food has an important place in history. For example, Rosh Hashanah literally translates to “head of the year.” The easiest way to have a head make an appearance on the menu is to roast a whole fish.” Beca explained that bonus details that fish also symbolize fertility and abundance.
“Once again, this holiday is all about food.”
“Not exactly. Rosh Hashanah is a time to ask God for forgiveness for our wrong-doings and guidance not to repeat the mistakes.”
“Sort of like confession, but yearly rather than weekly.”
“Kind of.”
Beca explained that their synagogue typically offered their tzedakah, or charity to the less fortunate, in the form of food. “The ladies at the community center always have meals for the needy. But this year, we couldn’t find a way to deliver roasted fish and keep it fresh. Since the synagogue and center are limited to 50% capacity because of COVID, the ladies fill grocery boxes for our needy families.”
“I’m fulfilling my good deed with these cards. Stacie and I will hand-deliver them along with a symbolic apple and jar of honey that I got from the guy who normally sells at the farmer’s market.” Beca explained how happy he was to get such a large order during a time when the market couldn’t be open due to crowd restrictions.
Chloe asked if she could help deliver the cards to which Beca wasn’t going to say no. She loved that Chloe was a willing participant in her faith. This request also meant that perhaps Chloe had forgiven her for the honey incident with Major and Bea. “With your good deed, may God seal your name in the ‘Book of Life,’ which brings the promise of a happy year to come.” Beca squeezed Chloe’s hand.
“L’Shanah Tovah.” Chloe stumbled over the Hebrew phrase. “L’Shanah Tovah.” Slowly she became more comfortable. “And this means “A Good Year?”
Beca nodded as she got both wagons loaded with cards, apples, and honey. “Yup. L’Shanah Tovah is how you wish someone a Jewish Happy New Year.” When Major saw his mom pulling out his wagon, he began to squeak and click. He raced wildly around his cage, knowing that he was going for a ride when Beca put things in the wagon. While Bea hadn’t quite learned this yet, she followed suit and ran around, chasing Major.
“Calm down, kids. Yes, you are both going. But first, you have to get dressed. Major, you know this.” Major’s shirt was blue with silver writing. It said, “this is going to be The. Best. Year. Ever. L’Shana Tovah!” There was a shofar in the background. Beca explained to Chloe that a shofar was a ram’s horn that someone blew during the synagogue ceremony. “The blowing of the horn is kind of a big deal.” As she slipped Major’s shirt on, Beca muttered under her breath. “Best year ever? Humpft. 2020 bites!”
Bea had a nice shirt with a honey pot, a pomegranate, and an apple covered in honey. Chloe had found a pomegranate shirt with a heart inside the fruit. Beca’s said, “Without Shofar, Life Would Be Flat.” A ram’s horn accompanied the words - like on Major’s shirt.
“That must be Stacie,” Beca announced when they heard a knock on the door. Luckily her friend had stopped letting herself in the apartment since Chloe had moved in. Only one embarrassing incident cured her of barging in like she did when Beca was single.
“Ta-da!” Stacie triumphantly leaped over the door jam and displayed her shirt, which said “Rosha Llama,” and featured a llama picture with an apple and a glass of wine. Beca shook her head, not knowing how Stacie could find funnier Jewish shirts than herself.
Stacie then produced pint-sized shofars for the guinea pigs. “I know Major will come closer to wearing his around his neck than Bea, but I thought it’d be funny.”
Delivering the gifts would have been quicker via car, but Beca decided a little sunshine and vitamin D wouldn’t hurt any of them. COVID restrictions had eased some, but after being cooped up most the spring and summer - being outside was lovely. Major squeaked and chirped the entire first half of the trip, running from one side of the wagon to the other until he finally curled up and fell asleep next to Bea.
Beca had a brief conversation in Hebrew at each person’s house as she handed over the gifts. Then all three would wish the resident Happy New Year before going on to the next place. Chloe had her girlfriend’s hand, swinging it as they walked. “Why do you talk to them in Hebrew?”
“Many of these people came from the mother-land. Even if they are American-born, speaking the language is a sign of respect. Especially from the younger generation such as myself.” Beca shrugged. “I studied Hebrew for years. I might as well use it.”
As the group walked back to Beca’s, the DJ began to talk about Yom Kippur. “This is the holiest day of the Jewish year.” Beca explained that this was a time for repentance and renewal. “At school, they taught us that God opens the Book of Life each year on Rosh Hashanah to write a person’s fate for the coming year. The book isn’t sealed until Yom Kippur, the “Day of Atonement.” The Days of Repentance thus offers an observant Jew the opportunity to atone for past misdeeds and seek forgiveness, and mend her behavior through the practice of teshuvah, or “return.”
“That’s why when you offered to help me deliver my cards, I wished you to be “written in the Book of Life.” And then comes the fun part.” The DJ’s voice was dripping with sarcasm. Beca explained the twenty-five hour period of fasting to include food, drink, and sex. “Everything. I know giving up sex for Lent was difficult for you, and I realize that twenty-five hours isn’t that long. But no food or drink. Ugh.”
Chloe assured her she’d help Beca through the day of fasting and that everything would be okay. “You know I don’t keep kosher, right? I don’t do a few more things, such as not using electricity or a car on the Sabbath or Holy Days. I hope this doesn’t mean I’m failing as a Jew.” Chloe assured her she wasn’t. “I’m not even attending synagogue this year.”
“If the synagogue is open at 50% capacity, I don’t understand why you aren’t going. Isn’t this time of year to celebrate God’s creation of the heavens and the Earth?”
Beca’s synagogue had technically skated around some of the city ordinances for large gatherings during Rosh Hashanah but did so carefully. They’d taped off the parking lot in grids with six feet on all four sides of the grid. Each family unit occupied a grid, thus complying with social distancing regulations. Plus, being outside helped. The repeated blowing of the shofar heralded the coming of the new year.
Even with the outdoor space, the room was limited. The synagogue held one service for Orthodox Jews in Hebrew and another for Reform Jews in English. “I don’t feel I have to attend services. Many of the other members would feel out of place if they didn’t. Yom Kippur is going to be crazy. There’s no telling how many services they will run. I believe families have to make reservations.”
Beca had Stacie over the night of Yom Kippur for the traditional pre-fast feast. She and Chloe had made a roast chicken, sweet and sour meatballs, roasted potatoes, leeks, and matzah ball soup. Stacie had dropped by the bakery and picked up a massive round of Challah bread and a sweet apple kugel. Beca made herself a gigantic plate of food, and Chloe couldn’t keep her eyes off her girlfriend as Beca kept eating and eating. “What?” Beca threw her a side-eye glance.
“I’ve never seen you eat this much. It’s intriguing. I”m not sure where you fit it.”
Beca finished downing her third glass of water. “Gotta get the nutrients in while I can.” After glancing at the clock, she exclaimed, “eight more minutes. My alarm goes off at 6:08. Then... ” Beca made an explosion sound and threw her hands up in the air.
Chloe lovingly rubbed her girlfriend’s arm up and down. “I support you, Beca, and have faith you can do this. Remember the time you got the flu? When I made your Bubbe’s chicken soup? You didn’t eat for over a day and a half then. This fast is only a day.”
“Yeah, big deal.” Beca scoffed. “I was asleep most of that time, too.”
When Beca’s alarm sounded, and the fasting period began, Chloe was careful not to eat or drink anything around Beca. She would do her best to be supportive of her girlfriend. She knew how difficult this would be since Beca loved her food almost as much as she loved Major and her, of course.
The next morning, Chloe got out of bed as quietly as possible and made sure she tightly pinned the black-out blinds closed. She had showered the night before and laid her clothes out in the living room. The longer Beca stayed in bed, the better.
When Chloe got to the clinic, Stacie was already at work. The first client had yet to arrive, so Stacie pulled a box from her locker and went to her boss’s office. “I come bearing gifts.” She opened the box to reveal several donuts and fruit-filled kolaches.
“My savior,” Chloe exclaimed. “I’m trying to be supportive of Beca, but I don’t think I can concentrate on work without food in my stomach.”
“I figured as much.” Stacie waved her hand over the box. “Your choice. I’ll put the rest out in the staff room.” Chloe picked a chocolate-covered donut with sprinkles and a peach kolache. “Thanks, Stacie. You’re a peach,” she giggled as she took a massive bite out of the kolache.
When Beca woke up and realized it was pushing 9 a.m., she panicked at first then relaxed, realizing she had no appointments that day. The studio was only open for major artists who needed to lay down tracks and production that required sophisticated studio equipment. For the most part, people were still afraid of getting out in public unless they absolutely had to. Plus, this gave artists the excuse to have fancy equipment installed in their homes.
Sometimes Beca took advantage of her religion and took holidays off from work, especially the High Holy Days. Before COVID, she spent a lot of time at the community center so she didn’t feel guilty about taking the days off. But this morning, she was at home, alone in bed, and craving caffeine like a beast. Beca sat up and swung her legs off the bed. And then her hunger hit. Her stomach gave a tremendous rumble. “And so it begins,” she grumbled as she pulled herself up and got dressed.
Beca smacked her lips together and grimaced, knowing her breath probably stunk to high heaven. She could dry brush her teeth, which might help, or she could use toothpaste, spit a lot, and scrub the rest off with a dry washcloth. “Maybe I should atone for breaking fast,” Beca grumbled as she decided to just dry-brush her teeth to keep away the temptation of swallowing the rinse water. She went to the living room and fed Major and Bea before she plopped on the couch to sit in darkness. “I think I’ll go whole hog this year.” She didn’t turn on any lights and didn’t turn on any music but pulled open the blinds in the living room, grabbed one of Chloe’s books from the shelf, and read.
Beca’s eyes kept drooping because of the quietness in the apartment. No television, no music, not even the hum of a lightbulb. She finally relented, marked her place in her book, and took a nap. When she woke up a few hours later, she felt like her stomach would chew a hole right through her backbone. She’d fasted before and knew she could do it, but she also knew she was incredibly cranky on Yom Kippur.
Searching for punishment, Beca wandered into the kitchen and opened the refrigerator. She decided if she couldn’t eat anything, she’d throw it all out - at least the things that were close to expiration - the leftover pizza from two days ago and Chinese take-out, which, while delicious cold, needed to be banned from the fridge. All other leftovers which were tempting to heat up and eat also were dropped into the garbage bag.
She dragged the trash bag to the garbage chute down the hallway and shoved it in. “Good riddance,” she muttered. Luckily Stacie had taken all the food left after their pre-Yom Kippur feast. Throwing away that food would have been a shame.
Returning to the kitchen, she opened the fridge door to see if she missed anything that might tempt her in the time remaining until 7:07. Seeing nothing, she went and sat on the couch again. The light was bothering her, so she closed the blinds. Then Beca realized she couldn’t see, so she got back up and opened them.
[2:33 pm To Chloe: I’m hungry!]
[2:35 pm To Chloe: I’m thirsty!]
[2:35 pm To Stacie: Order me a pizza?]
[2:36 pm To Stacie: It’s not cheating if you do it]
[2:39 pm From Stacie: No]
[2:41 pm To Chloe: Chloooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeee]
[2:42 pm To Chloe: I’m hungry]
[2:46 pm To Chloe: I’m staaaaarving!]
[2:50 pm From Chloe: I know you are, babe]
[2:50 pm From Chloe: Only four hours to go]
[2:51 pm From Chloe: I love you]
[2:52 pm To Chloe: If you loved me, you wouldn’t let me go hungry]
[2:53 pm To Chloe: I might die right now]
[2:58 pm From Chloe: You aren’t going to die, Beca. Tone down the dramatics]
Beca frowned and tossed her phone on the couch beside her. She hadn’t been in the mood to give Major or Bea any attention, and they’d ramped up their clicks and squeaks to get Beca’s attention. They weren’t used to her being home and not getting love and affection.
“Shut up!” Beca yelled before stomping over to the cage. “If I can’t eat, nobody can eat.” When she reached into the enclosure to take out their food bowl, Major gave her fingers tiny licks. “Be sweet all you want, but no food.”
Beca cleaned the apartment, washed clothes, and other mundane tasks to keep her mind occupied about anything other than her growling stomach. She finally jerked the blinds closed and plopped on the couch. And this is how Chloe found her when the redhead came home from work. Chloe stumbled her way to the couch with not much light in the room and took a seat by Beca.
“Hi, babe. How are you doing?”
“How do you think,” Beca snapped. “I’m hungry. And thirsty . I hate this.”
“Have you been sitting in the dark all day?” Chloe kept her voice level and calm.
Realizing she was being a brat, Beca tried to temper her anger. “No. I had the blinds open to read this morning. Then I cleaned out the fridge. And I cleaned the apartment. And washed the clothes. This has been the worst day of my life.” She snuggled into Chloe and kissed her before quickly jumping to her feet. “WHAT have you eaten? I smell it. On your breath. Is. That. Peanut. Butter?”
The redhead’s heart sank as she realized that maybe she shouldn’t have had peanut butter cheese crackers as her afternoon snack. Or she should have at least brushed her teeth. Chloe decided her best course of action would be to ignore her girlfriend’s tantrum. Chloe got up to say hi to Major and Bea. “Umm, Beca, did you not feed the guinea pigs today?”
“They were annoying me with their noises. I decided if I had to fast, they had to fast.”
“Well, they fooled you. You forgot to take their water bottle out,” Chloe giggled as she quietly put their food bowl back into the hogs’ cage. She scratched both their heads to let them know Beca didn’t mean to be an ass.
“Shut up,” Beca said in a very rude tone.
“Beca, I’ve never seen you be this hangry before.”
“I’m NOT hangry.”
“Hangry, hungry an…”
“I know what it is. I’m not angry. I’m… frustrated.” Beca moved to the recliner so she could sit alone.
Chloe perched herself on the edge of the recliner’s arm. She tried to reach out and touch Beca’s arm, but her grumpy girlfriend jerked away and turned her back on Chloe.
Chloe sighed. “I learned about this in undergrad bio. Being hangry is real and is triggered when the level of nutrients in our bloodstream begins to drop. When the brain runs dry of fuel, it stimulates a stress response. It's a survival mechanism.”
“I’m not stressed, just hungry.”
“Just know it’s okay, Beca. Your inhibition to different emotions is lowered.”
Since Beca didn’t have any of the lights on and hadn’t mentioned television or music as a part of her day’s entertainment, Chloe decided to respect the no electricity and quietly sang as she began to prepare part of the break fast meal. Luckily their stove was gas, so maybe Beca wouldn’t snap her head off for using electricity.
Stacie was coming over with bagels and lox along with a fresh pecan roll from the Jewish bakery. Chloe was making broccoli and cheddar frittata - something she figured wouldn’t give off much odor although Beca had retreated to hide in the bedroom with Major. The DJ realized that not letting the guinea pigs have food all afternoon could mean he was mad at her, plus she needed the comfort.
Chloe was cutting up fresh fruit and veggies when Stacie knocked then came in. “I figured it’d be safe just to come in, and I wouldn’t be interrupting anything. Oh, I brought the bagels and lox and the challah bread, but also this.” She sat a medium-sized silver serving tray on the counter. “Where’s Ms. Cranky?”
“In our room with Major,” Chloe replied as she rolled her eyes and told Stacie how Beca had made the guinea pigs go without food. They tried to muffle their snickers in fear of drawing Beca out of the bedroom. Chloe peeked beneath the lid of the serving dish. “This smells delish! What is it?”
“Huevos shakshuka. I know you told me to bring just the challah bread and pecan roll, but you’ve never seen Beca eat after a day of fasting. It’s just eggs poached in tomatoes, bell peppers, onions, and garlic. And tons of spices, of course.”
Chloe sniffed again. “And avocado. Looks wonderful. After seeing her eat yesterday, I believe you. Thanks for making sure we had enough food.”
Chloe set the table as she and Stacie nibbled on the fruit cubes while waiting for Beca’s alarm to go off at 7:06. When they heard the distant alarm, they both wiped their mouths to ensure no sticky fruit juice remained. Chloe rinsed her mouth out with water in case Beca wanted a kiss. They heard the bedroom door fly open, and the bathroom door shut quickly. When the water turned on, Stacie looked at Chloe with a raised eyebrow, and Chloe shrugged in response.
“G’mar Tov,” Stacie greeted. “I see you made it.”
“Barely, I nearly died, no thanks to you,” Beca grumbled as she sniffed Chloe’s breath. “No peanut butter,” she snarked, and Chloe got a whiff of Beca’s now minty fresh breath.
“I’m glad you didn’t die, babe.” Grabbing her petite girlfriend, she kissed her hard. “Is that mint I smell?” Chloe sassed.
Beca rolled her eyes. “Whatever, my stomach is pretty much eating itself. No more chit chat, let’s eat.”
Chloe already had Beca a plate fixed, so the tiny DJ pushed past Chloe to sit down and dug right in. “Gawd, food never tasted this good.” The other two laughed as they tucked in.
Stacie and Chloe had stuffed themselves as much as they could and were leaned back in their chairs, watching Beca eat helping after helping. After her third serving of everything on the table, she wiped her mouth and declared her stomach full.
“You sure, pal? There’s still some casserole left and a few bagels.”
“Bite me,” Beca quipped. “I’ll eat some more in a bit.” At least this time, she was smiling at her best friend. Stacie shot Chloe an “I told you so” look.
“Umm, Beca?” Chloe said tentatively. “I’m glad you made it through the day, which was a horrible day, by the way, for both of us. But if you ask me next year, you aren’t ever fasting again.”