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1.
Wave was not troubled at all.
Despite what everyone seemed to think, seeing Pang for the first time in a month didn’t actually affect him.
It’s not as if they had talked anyway. Pang just arrived at the cafeteria early (which they should have seen coming to be honest) and was behind them to get his plate.
And the thing is, when the whole group kept talking as if nothing was happening, Wave just froze. Pang was standing a few meters from him and yes, it may have made him a little happy to see his stupid cute face again but that was it.
Except that Namtaan saw him staring and she was convinced that him being frozen in front of Pang meant that seeing him again overwhelmed Wave, which was not true at all. Pang being okay meant that they could start working on their plan soon and it was the only thing that mattered to Wave.
Namtaan didn’t believe him when he said that though. And Claire was looking at him strangely and that couldn’t mean anything good. Fortunately she didn’t say anything, so Wave just decided to ignore her.
But now it was 11 PM and Wave couldn’t stop thinking about this small encounter with Pang. He tried to distract himself but everything led him back to his old classmate. Even when he was playing around on his computer, he ended up watching the video Pang made before losing his memories. He then decided to go for a walk around the school, which actually worked for a bit.
Until he involuntarily arrived in front of Pang’s room. He stayed in front of the door for an embarrassingly long amount of time, holding his breath. He hadn’t come back here since… well since the day of the exam. He had thought about coming back - especially because making plans in this room had become familiar - but being here without Pang just didn’t feel right.
But now that he was here, the desire to go inside to find this familiarity again (and maybe to somehow feel the other boy’s presence) was imminent.
Fuck it.
His heart missed a bit when he opened the door and he could finally feel his body relax in months. He felt at ease, especially because the room hadn’t changed at all.
“Wave?”
Too overwhelmed by his sudden return in the room, he hadn’t noticed Ohm and Namtaan sitting on the floor, with some snacks and bottles of soda next to them. They were both looking at him, the schock visible on their faces.
“Are you guys having a sleepover or something?”, Wave asked, confused.
They just looked at each other before Namtaan sighed and answered.
“We just come here when we miss Pang a little too much. At first we wanted to play like we used to, but without Pang it’s just not the same.”
“Well, you say that. I’m fine without him cheating.”
“He wasn't cheating, and you know it. You were just jealous.”, she retorted with an exasperated voice (but her fond look couldn’t fool anyone). “Anyway, now we’re just eating, drinking and talking about him. It helps.”
Wave nodded, understanding what she meant. He would never admit it, but sometimes hearing them talk about Pang at lunch or during classes also made him feel better and he could pretend, just for a bit, that nothing had changed.
“Alright, I’ll leave you to it then.”, he said and promptly went back to the door.
“Wait, Wave! You can stay, you know.I know you miss him.”
Wave stood still, facing the door instead of his classmates.
“I don’t miss him.”
“Okay let’s say I believe you, and you actually don’t. We’d still be happy to have you here, right Ohm?”
“Yeah! I’m sure you have a lot of embarrassing stories from the time you two were working together. I can’t wait to hear them!”
Wave finally turned to face them, unsure of what to say. Being around them still made him uncomfortable. He didn’t forget what he did to them, especially to Namtaan, and he knew that they didn’t forget either.
But Ohm and Namtaan’s expressions were hopeful, and he found out that saying no to them was apparently harder than what he expected.
“Okay. But just for tonight.”
Namtaan grinned widely at him and moved a little to give him some space next to her.
The evening passed pretty quickly and for the first time, thinking about Pang didn’t make him want to break something, or to mope around.
And maybe he went back to the room with Ohm and Namtaan on other evenings, because it did help, but that was no one’s business.
“I think we should start thinking of a plan to get Pang back.”
A deadly silence followed Wave’s comment. The gifted class had ended a few minutes ago and the students were all still in the classroom talking to each other. Even Wave had taken the habit to stay after class (instead of leaving immediately like he used to). But he rarely spoke, and when he did it was mainly to Namtaan.
Even though he didn’t look up from his computer, he could feel his classmates’ gazes on him. The sudden attention was starting to make him uneasy and he could feel his hands getting sweaty because of the nervousness. But he didn’t want to back off, so he spoke again but this time facing the others.
“We should think of a plan to get Pang back.”
“Wave… don’t you think it’s a bit too soon?”
Namtaan had been the one to answer, looking at him carefully. Wave knew she meant well, but her looking at him like if he was about to break bothered him. He did his best to keep his irritation deep inside as he answered.
“It’s been more than a month already. We can’t wait forever, we have to act at one point or another.”
“Yeah and the last time you acted too early it ended with Pang losing his memories so excuse us for not being very excited by your idea.”, Ohm snapped.
“Well, maybe Pang would still have his memories if you had actually paid attention to him and to what he was doing back then.”
His voice was cold, and he could feel his fingertips tickling. It usually happened whenever he got mad, or nervous. It was like if his body knew that getting close to any type of technology and using his potential could actually calm him down.
“That’s rich coming from someone who only wants Pang back for his stupid plan! You always say you don’t miss him and all of a sudden him coming back is so important, huh?”
“Of course, it’s for the plan! Because that’s what Pang would want us to do, you fucking-”
“Stop it! Wave. Stop.”
Namtaan’s frightened voice made him stop immediately and that’s when he realized that his body couldn’t stop quivering and that his breath was heavy. Not only that, but the lights in the room and his computer kept glitching. His body had apparently decided to use his potential against his will.
Well, it’s probably better than punching Ohm’s face.
Without saying a word, he packed his computer and left the room in a hurry. Determined to not look back, he went straight to his room and locked himself up.
He didn’t mean to snap at Ohm, and frankly he couldn’t be mad at him for not trusting him unconditionally despite them getting closer in the past few weeks, but thinking and talking about Pang and the plan still got him on edge. Whenever, his thoughts drifted towards Pang, he could see his devastated face on the day where their plan had failed and it made him sick.
A few knocks on his door interrupted his train of thoughts. Reluctantly, he went toward the door and started to open it.
“Look, Namtaan I’m sorry for earlier but I’m not- What are you doing here?”
Claire was standing on the doorstep, looking bothered (like most of the time). Not saying a word, she just walked past him and went to sit on his desk. She then stared at him for a couple of seconds, which was disturbing.
“Why are you here?”, he finally said.
“Namtaan wanted to come but she’s not as good with emotions as I am. Obviously.”
“It doesn’t answer my question.”
Claire made a small sound that was between a laugh and a sigh, before she started talking again, completely ignoring his questions.
“Ohm didn’t mean what he said, you know. We’re just all on edge.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“I know, but frankly I don’t really care.”
Wave closed his eyes and took a deep breath, trying to remain calm. He was about to talk, to simply end this conversation that was obviously not going anywhere, but Claire interrupted him once again.
“Look, just let me talk okay? Ohm didn’t mean it, I saw it and I know you didn’t mean it too. I know you want to seem like the guy who doesn’t like anyone and doesn’t care about anything but your colors are telling me something way different. Especially when Pang is around.”
“Shut up.”
“No, I won’t.”
The two students stared at each other, for what seemed like forever until Claire spoke again.
“You don’t scare me, Wave.”, she smirked for a brief moment, but her expression turned serious again. “Look, when I was looking at Punn before we were dating he always had multiple colors. Obviously, it was mainly because of his potential and I know that now. But… But you have multiple colors too whenever Pang is around. Usually, it’s a mix of sadness, happiness and…”
She left her sentence hanging, looking at him intensely as if she could see straight into his soul (it wouldn’t really surprise him if she actually could) and it made him feel almost naked and much more awkward than he would like to admit.
“And what?”, he asked, his voice weak.
He wasn’t really sure if he wanted to hear the answer.
She just smiled at him, a genuine one, which was pretty strange and just replied.
“I think you already know.” He thought he did too, but it scared him way too much so he pushed the feeling as deep inside of him as he could. “You know, Pang’s colors are pretty much the same as yours so whatever it is you’re feeling, he feels it too. Well, with a bit more confusion but you could have guessed that.”, she paused, sighed and stood up. “Anyway, I have to go. Just think about what I said.”
“Wait. Did you really just barge into my room to talk about my feelings? How are you always this dramatic?”
The comment made her roll her eyes, but when she answered she was smiling at him.
“Says the guy who literally started a purge inside the school because he was angry.”
The answer startled him for a bit. No one actually mentioned his past actions around him, even less in a joking manner. But there was no mistake: Claire was grinning at him, obviously proud of her comeback, and he couldn’t help but smirk in return.
“I guess that’s fair.”
She nodded then turned around to open the door. When her hand was on the handle she paused for a bit and spoke again.
“You know, I’m pretty sure that if you apologized and suggested a plan tomorrow, the others might be up for it. And it wouldn’t hurt if you admitted that you want to do it now because you miss Pang.”
She didn’t give him the time to answer and left immediately. Once he was alone, he threw himself on his bed and closed his eyes.
Tomorrow was not going to be easy.
3.
Realistically, they all knew that the possibilities of their plan working out on their first shot were very very low. Therefore, when the director prevented them from taking Pang to the computer room, no one was really surprised.
It didn’t stop Wave from being pissed though.
He wasn’t thinking clearly when he got back to his room and he could feel the rage and the desire to break something going through his veins. He was about to throw away the first thing he would find when his phone rang repeatedly.
Forcing himself to calm down, he looked at his phone and could see a few texts from Mon.
come to the gym right now
this is not a request if you’re not there in 5 minutes, i’ll ask punn to drag you there (and you know you don’t want to get on his bad side)
i know you need to let off some steam right now and we don’t want you breaking your computer again now, do we? :)
Wave was not scared of Punn. But he had to admit that getting on his bad side did seem like a terrible idea. And Mon’s suggestion wasn’t completely bad actually. If he stayed in his room, there was one hundred percent chances that his computer set would end up in pieces.
That’s why he quickly grabbed some sports clothes and went straight to the gym. Mon was waiting for him at the entrance and when she saw him, her face immediately lit up.
“I knew you’d come!”
Wave simply hummed in response and followed her inside the building.
“I was thinking we could do some boxing? I’ll get you some boxing gloves. You’ll do the punching okay?”
“Okay, but are you sure, you’re fit for it?”
“Wave, I can kick your ass even without my potential. So trust me, I can handle a few punches.”
And just like that, they started practicing. At first, Wave was simply punching the kick pads Mon was holding. They eventually had a few fights. Mon won all of them and Wave didn’t even have the strength to feel bitter about it.
Eventually, they sat against the locker, both of them out of breath. Mon handed him a bottle of water which he gladly accepted. The few minutes they spent sitting in silence were probably the best he had spent in the past few weeks. For the first time in forever his body didn’t feel tense and he felt like he could actually relax.
“Thank you for coming. I actually really needed this too.”
Mon’s voice dragged him out of his reverie and he nodded at her. He hesitated for a bit then looked at her and replied.
“Thank you too. It actually felt nice.”
“You’re welcome. You’re always free to come by. Who knows, you might beat me someday.”, she said, smiling widely at him (how did she always smile like that?) and he couldn’t help but snicker at her comment.
He knew he would probably do this again. He loved being so… carefree and to actually be able not to think about Pang for a few hours.
“Excuse me?”
Hold on.
“Is this where we can sign up for the martial art club?”
That voice…
Wave slowly turned his head to where the voice came from just to see Pang standing there, looking at them with his hopeful expression. Pang was grinning at them - at him - and suddenly all of the times where Pang and him were hanging around in his room, where Pang was smiling at him like an idiot for something Wave had said that wasn’t even remotely funny appeared before his eyes.
I can’t do this.
As his vision became blurry, he stood up abruptly and stormed out of the gym as fast as he could, vaguely aware of Mon screaming his name in concern.
4.
Wave had been lying on his bed since he had gone back from the gym, the vision of Pang’s cheerfulness stuck on his mind. But everytime he thought about it, another image appeared in front of him: Pang on his knees, in front of all of them, crying quietly as he realized that his plan was failing.
Just seeing Pang was enough for him to feel like his heart was sinking but the thought that slowly creeped into his mind during the past hours was the worst part.
Because… What if Pang was better off without them?
It definitely seemed like Pang was happier right now and Wave clearly remembered their conversations where Pang’s distaste of the Gifted program was more than obvious. Bringing him back didn’t feel like the right thing to do anymore.
And that’s when Wave found himself to be selfish. The simple idea of never talking to Pang again made him want to throw up. The last few months already felt like hell and he didn’t think he could live the rest of his life this way.
But maybe he should get used to the idea, because despite how selfish he was, Wave still wanted to put Pang first.
“Are you okay?”
Korn’s voice abruptly got him out of his thoughts. Wave quickly wiped his tears away and sat up, determined to ignore the question.
“How did you get in?”
“Punn picked the lock. And you haven’t been answering your door since yesterday so… the others are worried.”
“Hmm.”
Korn made his way towards the bed and sat down next to him, handing him what seemed like a book. Wave stared at it and moved his gaze back to Korn.
“What is it?”
“Just open it,” he replied, smiling as he put the book on his lap.
Reluctantly, Wave made himself more comfortable and opened the book, his heart accelerating when he saw what was inside. The book was made up of multiple pictures of Pang - usually with Namtarn and Ohm, but sometimes with others students from the gifted as well. He was smiling or laughing on most of them, but there were some where he was simply studying or seemingly lost in his thoughts. Wave couldn’t stop himself from smiling as he turned the pages, the pictures making him feel like home.
He stopped at a picture of him and Pang, sitting together on the roof. Pang was smiling widely at him which made his eyes sparkle while Wave was simply staring in front of him with a bothered expression but the faint blush on his cheeks was betraying his emotions. His eyes lingered on the picture as he traced Pang’s silhouette with his fingers.
“How did you get that one?”
“You’re not the only ones who like to be on the roof,” Korn said simply and paused for a while. Wave could feel his burning gaze on him. “I thought you two were a thing back then.”
Wave didn’t bother to reply, mostly because he didn’t want his voice to betray his feelings, but also because what him and Pang were was none of Korn’s business. He turned to the next page and another picture got his attention. Pang was in the gym and was staring at his hands with a mix of shock and horror on his face as Nac’s body was lying on the floor. His heart stopped at the sight. Pang’s expression in this picture was the precise reason why he didn’t want him to come back.
“Shit! I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean to keep that one.”
“It’s fine,” Wave sighed, his eyes closed before he started talking again. “I don’t think we should give Pang his memories back.”
“What?”
Korn’s disbelief was obvious but Wave just decided to ignore it.
“He never wanted to be in the Gifted program anyway. And he is happy,” his voice broke a little at the last word but he kept talking. “I’m pretty sure it’s better this way.”
Korn didn’t speak for a while. He was simply looking at him intensely, considering him. Wave didn’t like the way Korn’s gaze made him feel like he knew everything that was going on in his mind.
“Look, I know what it’s like to like someone so much that you just want to keep them safe from harm but sometimes you have to take into account what the other person wants too. And right now, I’m pretty sure Pang wouldn’t want us, wouldn’t want you , to face this on our own. Actually, this is probably the last thing he wants. And… Do you really think he wasn’t happy? Do you really think he wouldn’t want this,” he gestured at the pictures in front of them, “back? Especially this?”, he continued, as he turned the pages and pointed at Pang and Wave’s picture.
Wave could feel the tears prickling at the corner of his eyes and he had to look up at the ceiling to prevent them from falling. He didn’t know if Pang would want their friendship (if they could call it that) back, but Wave definitely did. Sometimes he wanted it so much that he couldn’t think about anything else. Pang had been the first person he trusted completely in a long time and he would give anything to be able to talk to him again and to feel his warmth next to him. God, he even missed them fighting.
Finally, he looked at Korn and nodded.
“You’re right.”
“Of course I am,” he retorted standing up. “We’re preparing the new plan tomorrow after class. Be there.”
Wave nodded again and handed the picture book to Korn.
“Here. Don’t forget this.”
“No keep it. I don’t need it, I have other pictures.”
The last comment made Wave frown as he asked suspiciously.
“How many pictures of us do you have?”
“A lot actually. But don’t worry, I don’t have that many of you, you actually scare me.”
Wave couldn’t help but snort, then laugh at that and Korn quickly followed him in his laughter.
5.
Wave knew that this was most likely their last chance to get Pang back.
The director was not at school on this day which prevented him from putting a stop to their plan and who knew when he would be gone again.
Thankfully, the first part of the plan unfolded successfully: Wave had bumped into Pang, dropped the pin attached to the little map, and made sure that Pang picked it up before leaving the cafeteria.
All he needed to do now was wait. And Wave hated it.
The last few hours had been terrible. First he had paced up and down like a caged lion in his room, before going to the library to get some work done. He gave up a few minutes later when he realized he was unable to focus on anything and now he was looking at the CCTV, making sure that Pang was okay.
Wave didn’t think he could stoop this low but here he was. How pathetic.
“Wave? Can you help me with that equation?”
Wave quickly closed the window showing the CCTV cameras and turned around, only to find Punn looking at him expectantly.
He frowned, “Why would you need help for an equation? Aren’t you supposed to know everything?”
“It’s just the first time I see that type of equation. And I hate to admit it but you’re still better at maths than I am.”
“Well, it was time you accepted the truth.”
Punn rolled his eyes, “Will you help me or not?”
Wave had to admit that the distraction was more than welcomed so he nodded (but still putting an annoyed expression as a facade).
Punn sat next to him and handed him the paper where the equation was written. Wave didn’t say anything and just started solving it in front of him (he knew Punn didn’t need explanations anyway). When he gave him the paper back, Punn was staring at him as if he was trying to read him. Wave sighed, as he knew what their next conversation would be (because apparently all his classmates had decided to become his therapist).
“Okay. What do you really want?”, he snapped.
“You need to trust Pang.”
“I trust him.”
The fierceness in his voice surprised himself as much as Punn. He didn’t know how much this was true until he said it out loud. Surprisingly, his trust in the other boy had even grown stronger in the past few months and he knew that if anyone could go through their plan, it was Pang.
“Okay,” Punn replied, unsure. “Why are you so worried then?”
“I’m not -,” Wave started but stopped almost immediately, “You need to tell your girlfriend to stop looking at my emotions.”
Punn smiled a little at that, “Bold of you to assume that she listens to me.”
Wave let out a little laugh, not really surprised. He figured Claire didn’t listen to anyone (and if he were being honest, he could probably relate to that). He looked back at Punn who was still staring at him.
“I’m not really worried. It just feels too good to be true, I guess.”
“Yeah, I can understand that. But watching Pang on the CCTV is not going to help you know.”
Wave couldn’t help the blush forming on his cheeks and he turned his face away, even if he knew it was useless. Punn didn’t make any comment about it though and just kept talking.
“Most of us are also worried you know. We’ve had enough failures in the past to be. So… We’re all waiting together in the classroom until tonight. Ohm has been making lame jokes for at least an hour so I understand if you don’t want to come but… we have some food, drinks and games. Trust me, it’s not really my type of evening either but… Right now it’s actually pretty helpful.”
Wave nodded, “Yeah. I guess even Ohm’s jokes wouldn’t sound too bad right now.”
“Be careful, you might regret saying that in an hour,” Punn replied, laughing lightly which made Wave smirk.
Waiting for Pang with them did make it easier, and the evening made him realize that he had started to put a bit of his trust in them as well. He obviously didn’t trust them as much as he trusted Pang but he was still willing to rely on them.
And it didn’t scare him as much as it used to.
Although, if anyone asked him if he had laughed at Ohm’s jokes that night, he would deny it vehemently (he merely smiled, that’s all).
1
For the first time in months, Wave was feeling peaceful.
Their plan had been a success, which meant Pang was back and resting and Wave was too tired to even try to hide his happiness.
He was currently sitting on the rooftop, enjoying the evening breeze when he heard a few steps behind him. He didn’t even need to turn around to know who it was.
“You should be sleeping.”
“So should you. You look like you haven’t slept in days.”
“But I’m not the one who just got all of my memories back.”
Wave knew his last comment was a mistake even before Pang was right next to him, looking at him with the same expression of a kid on christmas.
“Are you worried about me?”
“No. We just need you in good shape for our next plan.”
“Ouch,” he replied, a hand on his heart as if he were in pain.
Wave simply shook his head, ready to put an end at this conversation.
Pang didn’t seem to want the same thing though.
“You can’t lie to me, you know. I know you missed me.”
“I didn’t.”
“Riiiiiight. I believe you,” Pang’s tone told him that he didn’t believe him but he couldn't find the strength in him to deny it, “But if you’re not going to admit it, I will. I missed you.”
Wave huffed at that, “Missed me? You didn’t even remember me?”
“I didn’t. It didn’t stop me from missing you though,” he replied, “I mean, I knew there was something missing and at first I thought it was just related to the gifted program you know. But when I was looking at you precisely… The feeling was just more intense? The only thing I could think about was going to see you and talk to you and make you laugh and-.”
Pang stopped talking abruptly, which made Wave look directly at him for the first time since Pang arrived on the rooftop. Pang was definitely avoiding his gaze though, looking straight in front of him instead.
“And what?, he asked curiously.
Pang shook his head, “Nothing.”
Wave knew it wasn’t the truth but he also knew that pressuring Pang to answer was not the right move so he nodded silently, determined to change the subject.
But then Pang suddenly got closer to him and grabbed his hand, “I just really missed you.”
Wave’s eyes went from Pang’s unsure expression (still not looking at him) to their joined hands, his breath catching at the sight. Pang’s hand felt warm against his own and it didn’t surprise him to see that he didn’t want to let it go.
It was his turn to be brave, he realized. Pang had been expressing his feelings since he got here and the least Wave could do was to return the favor. So he squeezed Pang’s hand as he took a deep breath.
“You know, you’re the first person I trusted in years right?”
Pang turned his head towards him, looking at him with a soft expression, “I had a hunch, yes. Although, I wasn’t completely sure you did trust me.”
“I do. I didn’t want to at first, but there is just something about you that made me want to be around you and… confide in you. And I somehow knew that you wouldn’t break my trust. So thank you.”
Pang’s smile grew wider as Wave kept talking and Wave found himself blushing.
“I’m honoured, really. I trust you a lot too. And,” Pang hesitated,” I’m proud of you too. I knew you opened up to the others while I was away.”
Wave nodded. He thought about Namtaan and Korn’s kindness, Ohm’s jokes, Mon and Claire’s honesty and Punn’s reassuring words. At first, he thought he only felt trust towards them but this made him realize that he had grown attached to them and that he wouldn’t hesitate to save them if needed, even if he was hurt in the process.
“Yeah. They’re not so bad.”
Pang rolled his eyes, smiling fondly at him, “And me?”
Wave snorted, “No, you’re just annoying,” Pang’s expression didn’t change at all, proving that he didn’t believe him. Wave couldn’t stop looking at him and he knew pretending that he and Pang weren’t friends (or definitely more, where he was concerned) was useless, “But I guess I like it,” he did his best to steady his breath but didn’t look away from Pang, “I like you.”
Surprise crossed Pang’s expression for a bit before it was replaced by a wide smile. Pang moved a little to face him, still not letting go of his hand. Slowly, he placed his free hand on Wave’s cheek, which made Wave’s heartbeat accelerate.
“This is what I’ve wanted to do,” Pang started, “This, and holding your hand, and hugging you, and,” Pang paused, looking straight into his eyes, “And kissing you. I couldn’t understand why and I swear you were driving me crazy.”
Wave winced, “I’m sorry.”
“No,” Pang laughed, “Don’t apologize. I’m glad. It made me realize how much I cared about you. How much I liked you actually. I really like you Wave.”
Wave’s brain had completely stopped working. The only things he could think about were Pang’s hands holding his own and cupping his cheek, Pang’s soft voice telling him he liked him, Pang’s eyes looking at him as if Wave could give him the stars (and Wave knew his expression was similar).
Pang, Pang, Pang.
And before he realized it, Wave passed his free hand around Pang’s neck and he pressed their lips together.
The kiss didn’t last long but it was enough to make him feel more than he had ever felt with anyone. Everything with Pang had always felt more intense and this wasn’t an exception.
Wave’s forehead was resting against Pang’s. He had his eyes closed and a small content smile was playing on his lips and Wave couldn’t stop himself from pressing their lips together one more time, for a simple peck.
“I meant it though. You should be resting.”
A little laugh escaped Pang’s lips, “You’re so stubborn. But you’re right. You have to come rest with me, though.”
“Okay.”
Still holding his hand, Pang led him to his room.
And Wave knew he would never want to let go.