Chapter Text
1.
"Stark gave you a multi-billion dollar AR tactical intelligence system, and the first thing you do with it is try to blow up your friends. I told him, it's clear to me, that you're not ready for this," former SHIELD Director Nick Fury said to Peter with a somewhat 'disappointed' undertone to his words but before either of them could say anything else, the glasses Tony left for Peter flashed a bright blue, drawing their attention to them. "What is that thing doing now?"
Not sure himself, Peter put's on the glasses and they both jump apart when a life-size very realistic hologram of none other than the man whose name they were invoking appeared between them, well beyond having startled them. The hologram of Mr Stark is dressed in one of his old band T-shirts that Peter usually saw on him only in the lab in the last few months before the battle with Thanos, there's some grease on his hands and the very same glasses Peter was now wearing over his eyes. He stood with one hip cocked, eyebrows arched, looking over the rim of his glasses straight at Fury with his arms crossed in an almost perfect imitation of Ms Potts' disapproving stance that she had no doubt used on him many times in the past. The two could only gawked as the hologram Stark glared at Mr Fury.
"I take it that, if this is playing, I am for some reason gone and Popeye is bothering Peter, so I'll skip the introductions as you all know who I am," the hologram even sounded like a perfect copy of Mr Stark and Peter felt his eyes prickle with tears. "I'm guessing that, at some point, you'll try to pull the same dick move on Spider-Man as you did on Iron Man, all those years ago. Make it seem like he's not 'Avengers material' or that he should do 'more'. Like that shitty evaluation you had Agent Romanoff write about me so you can dangle it over my head that I'll never be an 'official' Avenger or something like that. Lemme just stop you right there," the hologram even out up a stop sign with his hand. "You don't get to play these games with Peter. Consider this your only warning. If I ever catch wind of you trying to manipulate any of my kids, you can be sure I'll retaliate."
Mr Fury actually scoffed, whether he wanted to or not, at the ridiculous thought of a dead man coming to haunt him.
The hologram shocked them by glaring harder, right at Fury. "Don't you scoff at me, Cyclops. I'm Tony fucking Stark, I do whatever the hell I want. I also left it in my will that both Doctor Strange and Professor Hulk are obliged to obliterate anyone who so much as thinks of manipulating or using or endangering my kids. Pepper knows about this, so don't think Stephen or Brucie-bear haven't agreed to this. They're my awesome facial hair bro and science bro respectively. Believe me, they'll respect my dying wish, not to mention that Stephen likes Peter, and if not the good doctor then his magical cloak. He'll be on your ass in a second, Fury. EDITH knows to call him should this repeat. Even dead, I'm the hero. Peace out, mother fucker."
And with that, the hologram closed, leaving the two in a stunned silence.
"Should I call for Doctor Strange, Peter?" EDITH asked perhaps a bit too sweetly and Fury actually hightailed it out of sight.
Peter just smiled, eyes blurry with tears.
He really missed Tony so much.
2.
"Stark choose you. He made you an Avenger. I need that. The world needs that. Maybe Stark was wrong. Was he?"
"Bitch, please!" They both jumped in surprise when none other than Doctor Stephen Strange portal in out of nowhere, looking at Fury with what Peter would say was the best resting bitch-face he'd ever seen, if he were to actually use such vulgar words. "He's been to space. He fought Thanos. Twice. And he's only, what? Sixteen? What have you done to contribute to the fight? Sit on your fat ass and watch with a bag of popcorn? He should be the one calling the shots, not you. Especially as he now has the best surveillance system this side of the universe."
"Doctor Strange? I thought you were unavailable?" The shocked teenager barely managed to ask, surprised by the sorcerer's unexpected visit.
"I am. I deal with otherworldly and dimensional threats-"
"But this is-" Fury cut in but Doctor Strange cut him off as though he'd never uttered a word.
"Not some petty charlatans that are jealous of Tony Stark's achievements and want to take the credit for themselves. You should go back to your trip, Peter, and let these asshats figure out they're being doped on their own. Drop by the Sanctum when you get back!" With a wave from the Cloak of Levitation, the man disappeared back through the portal as he had come, leaving the two to stare into empty air.
Peter cleared his throat awkwardly as he started backing away. "Right, I'm gonna be leaving now. I'll leave it to you to figure that charlatan thing out, bye!" And he swung away before Fury could try and drag him into fixing the mess the man had helped make, wondering what Doctor Strange had meant.
'It's a good thing I called him personally or who knows what could have happened.'
3.
"What do you think, kid?" Beck smiles as he tries on the EDITH glasses, but before Peter can respond, they light up red and alarms start blaring from their hidden speakers.
"Alert! Unauthorized user! Activating 'Piss off, bitch' protocols. Scanning. Biological match found: Quentin Beck, former Stark Industries employee, deemed unstable and dangerous. Sued for attempted dealing under the table. Threat level: six. Course of action: call the authorities." And before anyone could blink, EDITH had indeed called authorities before zapping Beck with a tranquilizer shot that had him convulsing on the floor. Peter lunged for the glasses when the bartender made to grab him and shot a web outside the bar, swinging himself out. "Informing Director Fury," EDITH told him when he put on the glasses, several blocks away by the time whoever was working with Beck and that bartender could react.
"Thanks, EDITH," he breathed in relief, surveying his surroundings from the roof of a tall building. "What just happened? How do you know Mr Beck? What do you mean by fired? Dealing under the table? But he's a superhero from another dimension!"
"I sensed no energy signature to suggest as much, even after comparing data with the ones in the databanks on Thor Odinson, Loki Laufeyson and even Doctor Stephen Strange. Quentin Beck's biochemical energy signature suggests he is a baseline human and his previous record suggest he is dangerous." The AI replied even as she sent a report to Mr Fury and Peter could just sigh sadly.
Well, at least he can go back to his trip if the threat was fake! Thank god fir EDITH! Can you imagine the sort of trouble Beck could have gotten up to if he hadn't been discovered, even though they still don't know how he's involved with this too-realistic-but-apparently-fake monsters.
'Thanks, Mr Stark. For always looking out for me and keeping me safe.'
In a dimension beyond this one, a genius engineer smiled.
4.
"If you were good enough, then maybe Tony would still be alive!" Peter flinched back from those words almost worse than the illusion that was starting up, of the graveyard and the metal clad hand that sprung up from the ground, only for the illusion to come to a screeching halt when a very distinguishable "Hey!" pierced the air.
There, in the middle of the nightmare, stood none other than Tony Stark, dressed in some fancy suit, glaring daggers at the now visible Beck. Only it was clear the dead man was still very much dead, as he was transparent and glowed a beautiful but familiar orange of the Soul Stone, which left Peter gawking. Beck, on the other hand, looked like he had seen a ghost, backing away in fear and pointing a shaking finger at the genius apparition.
"Y-you!"
"Yeah, me! Leave my kid alone."
"You should be dead!"
Tony huffed, completely unimpressed. "And I am, but I swore to myself I'll haunt the ass of anyone who dares mess with my friends and family and Petey here is my kid so fuck off, Beck, or else I'll become your personal nightmare! And stop trying to steal my tech!" And then he poofed out of existence, leaving a traumatized villain-faking-being-a-hero and a young true hero who took back the EDITH glasses while they waited for Fury to come and lock the bad guy up. When Fury asked him how he did it, Peter refrained from telling the truth, keeping it a secret only he and Tony will share, a new piece of his mentor to hold on to.
All he said was that it was a "Guilty conscience," and he knew Fury didn't believe him, but he didn't care.
As they watched over the scene from afar, the soul of Tony Stark turned to smile at the still guilty-feeling Doctor Strange, who had arranged for him to be able to pop in for a visit every now and then. "Thanks, Doc."
And Stephen could only smile back.
5.
"Where's Parker?" Nick Fury asks as he and Maria Hill walk up to Happy and Peter wonders briefly what will happen now as he swings over the Tower Bridge to search for MJ while EDITH shows him this scene fir some reason. He hadn't asked her for the visual, but she keeps on insisting this is important and that he should watch.
"He's with the girl," Happy answers, sounding both nervous and confident and Peter's impressed given Happy's previous insistence that Fury scares him and that he doesn't want to talk to him.
"I need to speak with him," the taller, dark skinned man insists but Happy makes Peter proud by standing his ground.
"He'll call you."
And the teen almost wants to laugh at the incredulous expression that briefly crosses Mr Fury's face at that before he gives a bizarre laugh.
"He'll ca- Well, he better."
"Don't worry," a new familiar voice says and all three whirl around, eyes going as wide as Peter's were when they fell upon the impossible sight of an alive and perfectly fine Tony Stark standing there, leaning a bit on an amused Doctor Stephen Strange for support, smirking with pride and obvious smugness at having managed to catch Mr Fury off guard. "I'll make sure of it. After he goes on his first date with his girl."
"Tony?!" The incredulous Happy's shriek was the last thing Peter heard before he slammed into a lamp post since he hadn't been paying attention, quickly scrambling to his feet when he heard MJ calling his name. He'll go cry on his mentor's shoulder later, he has a girl and a date to win!
1 (bonus)
"Hey, there," Talos said as cheerfully as he could when he and Soren later call Fury on his secret mission in space. "I hope your mission is going well. We gave the glasses to Parker, about a week ago, like you said. And, uh, it was really touching, you know? Really, really quite touching."
"Talos!" Soren hissed at him and Talos sighed, resigned.
"And, uh, you know, shortly after that, everything kind of went off the rails, and so we need you to come back. Because everyone kept asking me where the Avengers are, and I don't know what to say. So you're lucky ... Oh, before you go!" He hurries on when Fury makes to end the call, rushing it all out so he doesn't get cut off. "Tony Stark's alive and hanging out with the wizard! Okay, great talk, bye!" And he quickly cuts the call, sighing in relief. "Well, that went well."
And Soren just facepalms.
Meanwhile, somewhere in space ...
"That crazy son of a bitch!" Fury laughs, delighted, before turning to his spaceship companions. "Alright, people, we got work to do! Where's my socks? Can't meet with Earth's best defender back from the dead without my socks!"
THE END