Chapter Text
Christmas had been much more magnificent than Ben would have ever thought possible a few months, even weeks ago. Lexi’s excitement for the whole day made it magical. From the second she woke up and screamed “Santa’s been!” through the whole flat; to watching her reaction to all the presents she had; to her and Ben joining in with the Strictly Christmas Special had made Ben smile from ear to ear all day. Him, Lola and Jay had shared the responsibility of cooking Christmas Dinner and although it wasn’t quite up to the standards of his Mum, they’d done a fairly decent job. His little family had certainly made the most of their first Christmas in their own home. Ben had another reason for embracing the Christmas spirit though. After his drink with Callum the previous day, Ben had been on cloud nine. Just spending time with Callum alone and talking and laughing so easily had me made his heart soar. He was so overjoyed that Callum had loved the present as much as he hoped. But more than anything Ben couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss Callum placed on his cheek. He could still feel his warm breath against his skin, the sensation of his lips brushing against his cheek and the way he held his hand. Ben was certain that it was more than a cordial Christmas greeting. The way Callum looked at him sent shivers down his spine. He knew it was something more than friendship. It had given him renewed hope that Callum would find his was back to him.
Since then Ben and Callum had exchanged several messages. He’d sent a few photos of Lexi on Christmas Day. One of her wearing the apron that was part of the baking set Callum had bought for her; one of her and Ben wearing the hats from their crackers and one Ben had taken of Jay passed out drunk. He also happened to have drawn a penis on his forehead and captioned the photo - Always said he was a dickhead! Callum had responded to the each photo with how much he loved them, ending with a heart emoji and an extra crying with laughter one for the photo of Jay. They’d also just exchanged general messages about how their days had been and interesting things that had happened. Ben was heartened by the fact that things between them had once again seemed natural and easy. It reminded him of how things were when they first started out. He hoped that this was the start of something new, the fresh start he’d truly longed for, for so long.
A few nights later him and Jay were having a drink in the Vic. It was the first time Jay was willing to go out after he’d finally scrubbed the penis off his forehead. He still hadn’t forgiven Ben, especially as he’d had to wear make up to hide it from Lexi. Ben was attempting to make it up to him by promising all drinks were on him. The mood had thawed between them and they were happily chatting and joking. All of a sudden Ben’s heart flipped, when the door opened at in walked Callum. It sank when he realised he wasn’t alone.
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The past few days had dragged for Callum. Work had been less busy than usual over the festive period and hadn’t kept his mind as occupied as he’d hoped. He found himself constantly thinking of how he was going to end things with Ryan. He felt so terrible about the whole thing, he hadn’t meant to hurt Ryan, but he knew letting things go as far as they had, would lead to him being hurt. One thing that had cheered him up and reinforced to him he was doing the right thing, was the interactions he’d had with Ben. The photos on Christmas Day had made him smile and laugh and the way that they’d just chatted freely and easily made his heart sing. The way he got butterflies every time Ben’s name flashed on the screen, reminded him of when they first started seeing each other. He just hoped Ben still felt the same and this could be a fresh start for them. Ryan had also been in messaging and Callum had replied but kept it brief, not wanting to give him anymore false hope. They’d arranged for Ryan to come over when he got back and Callum was determined he was going to just be honest with him.
That’s why Callum was stood pacing the lounge, feeling sick as he waited for him to arrive that evening. Stuart and Rainie had gone out so he could have the flat to himself. He just hoped it wouldn’t be too difficult. He was stopped in his tracks by his phone ringing. His heart stopped when he saw Ryan’s name flash up, the last thing he wanted for him to cancel. He really did just want to get this over with.
He pressed the button to accept the call. “Hi, you on your way?”
“Hey gorgeous. Yeh I am, but I’ve just bumped into a mate I haven’t seen for ages. Don’t suppose he could join us for a quick drink? Thought we could pop to the Vic for a quick one, then head back to yours.” Ryan asked enthusiastically.
Callum hung his head, this was the last thing he wanted. “Actually, I really wanted to talk to you…alone.”
“Missed me have you?” Ryan giggled, “Come on…one quick drink, then you can have me all to yourself…promise.” Callum could imagine him doing puppy dog eyes as he spoke the words.
“Okay, I’ll meet you outside the flat and we’ll go together.” Callum surrendered. If he was going to break his heart, it was the least he could do. He ended the call, grabbed his jacket and wallet and headed out to meet them. Ryan looked so pleased to see him and pulled him in for a huge hug and kiss on the lips. He introduced him to his friend Tom and they walked over to the Vic. As soon as he stepped foot in the door he saw Ben and Jay at the bar. This was the last thing he wanted. He immediately saw the disappointment on Ben’s face and felt terrible. He suggested to Ryan to go and get a table and he’d get the drinks in. He approached Jay and Ben at the bar tentatively, wanting to explain things to Ben.
“Alright Son!” Jay exclaimed as he saw him. “You alright?”
Callum was nervous, Ben had given him a quick glance then turned away. “Yeh not too bad,” he replied wishing Ben would look at him. Then he thought of something that might get his attention. “Have you got somethin on your head Jay?” At that Ben let out a small grunt as he began to laugh as he turned to Callum with a huge grin.
Jay looked highly irked, “Did you send him that picture?” He turned to face Ben, “Ha, Ha bloody hilarious the pair of you.” Callum and Ben just smiled at each other.
Now he had his attention Callum wanted to explain himself. “Look Ben, I’m sorry about this, we weren’t supposed to come here…”
Ben cut him off straight away, “I’ve told you Callum it’s your local, you’ve every right to be here.”
“No you don’t understand…I need to talk to you, explain things…” Just as Callum was tryin to speak, he felt an arm creep around his waist. He squeezed his eyes shut tightly in discomfort, knowing who it was.
“Hey,” Ryan said warmly. “I was just wondering if your friends would like to join us. Ben right?” he asked although it was obvious he already knew. “And…” he asked extending his hand for Jay to shake.
“Jay,” he replied shaking his hand, “You must be Ryan.” Ryan just nodded and smiled in response. “Nice to meet you.”
“Likewise,” Jay replied.
Callum shook his head, “I think they’re probably busy right?” He was begging Ben and Jay to go along with him with an imploring look.
Jay understood what he was trying to do immediately and knew that neither Ben or Callum would want this. “Yeh we’re actually gonna shoot off after this one.”
“Oh we’re only having a quick one too. It’s just my mate feels like a bit of a third wheel, so he’d probably be a bit more comfortable if you joined us.” Ryan was quite insistent. “Come on just finish those with us, won’t hurt.” Jay, Callum and Ben looked at each other each with an obvious unease on their face. It felt like they had no choice so they agreed. “Great, you guys go over…I’ll help you bring our drinks over.” Ryan suggested and Ben and Jay walked over slowly, clearly confused about the turn of events.
Callum was equally confused, when he addressed Ryan, “What’s all that about?”
“Oh Tom, quite likes the look of Ben.” Callum’s eyes widened and he tried very hard to contain his anger at situation. “You don’t mind do you. I told him he was your ex but you were just friends now?” Callum was internally screaming at him. Of course he minded. The thought of someone else hitting on Ben made his stomach twist. But he knew he couldn’t say anything. Not without telling all to Ryan and it wasn’t fair to do it like this, now. So she just shook his head and smiled. Ryan then instantly turned towards Tom and gave him a subtle thumbs up. Callum felt like sick. He just hoped Ben wouldn’t be interested and make it clear and they guy would give up. This evening was turning into even more of a disaster than Callum thought it would be.
A while after Callum had returned to the table and formal introductions were made. When the others were distracted talking Callum managed to sign Sorry to Ben but he just shrugged, somewhat in confusion, somewhat in annoyance. Ryan had his hand on Callum’s thigh, although Callum had successfully managed to move it several times, it kept coming back. Ben was finding it hard to control his hurt at Ryan touching Callum. Jay was trying to make idle chitchat with Ryan and Callum. Callum wasn’t really paying any attention, he was intently watching the conversation between Ben and Tom. Tom was clearly trying to flirt with Ben, but Callum could tell Ben was unimpressed by the way his face kept screwing up when Tom spoke. Callum just wanted to cry, it was the most awful situation, he really wanted to ground to open up and swallow him. He was struggling to hide his jealousy, he was desperate to lean over the table and grab Tom and tell him to back off Ben. Of course he couldn’t do that without upsetting Ryan. He just had to sit there torturing himself.
Ben felt like someone was playing a cruel joke on him. The man he loved was sat opposite him with another man all over him and he was having to sit there and listen to some moron feeding him the corniest chat up lines he’d ever heard. Tom had asked what he did for a living early on in the conversation and once he found out he’d pulled out some cringeworthy lines related to cars. Ben wasn’t sure which was his favourite “If I was a car I’d need coolant right now, cos you’ve got my engine overheating,” or “If you’re lucky I’ll let you put your piston in my cylinder.” The guy was clearly not getting the hint, when Ben screwed up his face. In the end he’d had enough and decided to be direct.
“Look mate, it’s a bit awkward…” he started before Tom quickly interrupted.
“Oh is this about Callum?” he interjected, “Cos if it is don’t worry he’s already given me the green light.” Ben was livid. He thought Callum and him were getting somewhere. He’d sure he hadn’t read the signals wrong. Yet here he was trying to palm him off and someone else. Ben couldn’t believe how cruel it all was and his anger once again took over his rational thought. He wasn’t going to let Callum get away with it.
“Can I have a quick word?” he sternly asked Callum and gestured towards the bar. Callum just nodded and excused himself before following him. “What gives you the right to try and play God with my love life eh?”
“What?” Callum asked incredulously, having no idea what Ben was referring to.
“Telling Mr Cringefest 2021 over there he’s got the green light to try it on.” Ben spat with fury in his eyes.
“Wait Ben, you’ve got this all wrong…” he tried to set him straight.
“Yeh well I’ve been doin a lot of that lately,” Ben snarled. “He’s me thinking that we had something between us, that you wanted to start again and the whole time you’re just humouring me, pitying me! Poor old Ben wish he could move on, better give him a nudge so I can finally get him off my hands!”
Callum again tried to explain, “It ain’t like that Ben.”
“Don’t!” Ben shouted drawing the attention of a few people in the pub, including those on the table he had come from. He lowered his voice before continuing “What am I some pathetic charity case who needs a helping hand to find someone eh?” Callum again tried to speak but Ben want listening. “D’ya know what Callum I don’t need ya help. There’s plenty of places I can go if I wanna find a date…ya know what think that’s what I’ll do right now. Then you don’t have to feel guilty about goin home and shaggin ya fit boyfriend tonight!” And with that Ben stormed out of the pub. As soon as he got outside anger turned into heartbreak and a rogue tear fell down his face. Ben contemplated heading to The Albert to do what Callum wanted but the thought of it turned his stomach. Instead he headed to the Car Lot, he knew he had a bottle of Vodka stashed in there somewhere and he needed it tonight.
*****************************
Callum tried in vain to plead with Ben, make him see he’d got it wrong but he wasn’t listening. The thought of Ben going to find someone to replace him made him stomach knot even more. After a minute of trying to compose himself and headed back to the table. All of the men sat there looking at him in confusion at what had just happened. “He alright?” Jay asked as Callum sat down.
Callum tried to keep a neutral face and make out is wasn’t a big deal. “Erm…he just remembered he had to be somewhere.”
“That’s a shame,” Tom chimed in, “We were getting on so well. I don’t suppose I can have his number?”
Callum felt like his face was turning red with fury. This guy was unbelievable. He took a breath before responding. “I don’t think he’s interested,” he said trying to remain calm.
“Oh…that’s not the impression I got. Maybe if you give me his number he could tell me that himself.” Callum couldn’t believe how stupid this guy was, it was obvious Ben wasn’t interested by the way he cringed every time he spoke.
Callum tried to contain his anger but his patience ran out and he just exploded at Tom. “He ain’t interested!” he yelled, making the other three men at the table jump.
“Callum!” Ryan cried with confusion on his face.
Callum didn’t want to don’t this like this but he felt he no longer had a choice. “Look Ryan. I’m sorry but we need to talk,” he stated. Jay knew exactly what was going on, he knew Callum and his brother too well and knew how crazy they were about each other. He quietly gestured for
Tom to join him at the bar. Callum smiled in appreciation to Jay and then turned back to Ryan. “I’m sorry Ryan I didn’t want to do this here, like this but..”
Ryan was finally hit with a realisation of what was going on. “Oh my God!” he moaned. “I’m a complete idiot,”
“You’re not an idiot, I’m so sorry but I can’t do this anymore…I can’t pretend anymore.” Callum hung his head in shame.
“Pretend what, that you care about me. That what we have means something to you.” Ryan was struggling to hold back the tears.
“I do care about you and what we had did mean something.” Callum felt so guilty when he saw how hurt Ryan was. “I never meant to hurt you.”
Ryan shook his head. “Right cos stringing me along, letting me fall for you…when all the time you wanted him…that was supposed to make me feel good was it!”
“I didn’t mean to string you along…I wanted to be with you, give this a go…But when you told me you loved me I realised I didn’t feel the same,” Callum sighed deeply before continuing. “I couldn’t because…my heart belongs to Ben. I really wanted to stop lovin him and move on. But I think the truth is that I’ve loved him from the first moment I met him and no matter how hard you want it to, a love like that…well it don’t go away.” Ryan just huffed and shook his head. “I’m sorry Ryan, I really am!”
“Yeh you’ve said that, means nothing though I’m afraid.” And with that he stood up to leave. “Don’t bother trying to talk to me again. Stay out my way from now on.” He turned and walked over to Jay and Tom at the bar. “Come on Tom, we need to go. Turns out you’re not the only one who wants Ben!” Tom looked shocked but immediately followed his friend, putting a comforting hand on his back as they left. Callum put his head into his hands and rubbed his fingers into his eyes to try and stop the tears. He knew he had messed everything up and ended up hurting Ryan and Ben in the process. He suddenly felt an arm on the back of his shoulder and looked up to see Jay standing there.
“You alright mate?” he asked rather concerned.
Callum shook his head, “I’ve screwed everything up mate. I am shit at handling relationship stuff.”
“Mate tell me who is good at it!” Jay shrugged.
“Ive hurt Ryan and Ben is off probably snogging some random bloke in The Albert as we speak…I should have just told him how I felt straight away.” Callum was angry at himself and this was evident by the frustration in his voice. “I just thought it wasn’t fair to tell Ben until I ended it with Ryan…I was trying to do the right thing.” He let out a deep sigh.
“Mate, you’re a good guy. You always try and think of other people first.” Jay reassured him. “Sometimes it’s okay to go for what you want, even if people get hurt. You shouldn’t beat yaself up too bad.”
Callum nodded and contemplated Jay’s words. He realised that he was right and he needed to go for what he wanted. That was Ben. He stood up and thanked Jay. As he made to leave he heard Jay shout, “Where ya going?”
“Albert! I need to find Ben!” And with that he marched out of the pub. Determined to get what he wanted and make himself whole again.
******************************
Ben was sat with his head on the desk at The Car Lot. The one shot of vodka he’d sank had burned his throat and he wasn’t in a rush to down the second one he poured. He couldn’t believe Callum would mess him about so much. Then again, maybe it was payback for all the things that had he’d put him through. Maybe he deserved it. Seemed like no matter how hard he tried Callum couldn’t forgive him. Maybe it was time to give up and just concentrate on building on all the good he’d done for himself. He wasn’t one to walk away from a fight but he wasn’t sure his heart could take another beating. It was time to wave the white flag. A single tear escaped from his eye and he raised a glass to toast farewell to Callum’s love. Before he could down the second shot Jay burst through the door.
“There you are!” he said “Saw the light on and thought it must be you.”
“I don’t wanna talk about it Jay. I got the message loud and clear, just wanna sit and drown my sorrows in peace.” Ben was harsh in his tone but he didn’t want company. “Just leave me alone yeah!” Jay walked over and took the bottle away from Ben. “Did you not hear me?” Ben snapped.
Jay widened his eyes and nodded his head, “I heard ya loud and clear Bruv. Problem is I don’t think you read the message properly.” Ben screwed his face and shook his head and Jay just tilted his head to one side before continuing, “You see if you’d have stayed around a bit longer, you’d have seen Callum warning that Tom bloke off ya…and then telling his now ex boyfriend that it was over cos his heart belonged to someone else.”
“What?” Ben looked at him confused.
“Apparently, he’s still hung up on this snarky, little shit who’s got the maturity of a ten year old…but there’s no accountin for taste I guess,” Jay smirked at Ben as he spoke. Ben tried to take it all in, not quite believing what he’d heard. A smile started to spread on his face. “Yeh he’s so determined to get him back he’s gone to The Albert, to take on any other bloke that tries it on.” Ben’s heart started to pound, feeling like it was going to burst from his chest. He had to admit he was also a little excited, by the idea of Callum getting possessive over him. He was snapped out if his musings by Jay shouting, “Go get him ya muppet!” Ben raced out of The Car Lot as fast as he could. It seemed like he’d just found the final piece of the puzzle and he just needed to slot it in place to make himself complete.
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Callum was distraught, he hadn’t been able to find Ben in The Albert. He had images of him just going home with the first bloke who’d shown an interest. He was so angry at himself for not talking to Ben sooner. If he’d been braver perhaps he wouldn’t have found himself stood in the square just outside the gardens with the huge Christmas tree in the background. He saw the irony at being stood in the exact same place he’d lost Ben the first time. He would have laughed if he didn’t feel like his world had once again imploded. His chin fell to his chest as he tried hard to stop the banks of the rivers, swelling in his eyes, from bursting.
“Who rained on your parade?” he heard a familiar voice in front of him. Callum immediately raised his head and almost couldn’t believe the vision in front of him. Ben was looking at him with a warm smile and Callum’s heart immediately began to race. In the glow of the fairy lights his eyes were sparkling and not for the first time he took Callum’s breath away. “Sooo…” Ben went to speak but Callum was determined not to sit back this time. He had to let Ben know how he felt.
“Before you say anythin,” he said cutting him off. “I’m so sorry about earlier. I wasn’t tryin to push that bloke on ya I swear. Believe me the last thing I want is for you to be with anyone else.” Ben lips curled up slightly more at that. He went to tell Callum it was okay but again Callum was stoic in making sure he was heard. “See Ryan told me he loved me the other day and I realised I couldn’t say it back…because I would never feel it back. Turns out I gave my heart away to this beautiful, amazing guy a while ago and even though I tried to take back from him…he wouldn’t let go of it...No he held on tight and fought tooth n nail to remind me how much I mean to him.” Ben’s smile finally met his eyes, as the tears began to flow from them. Callum stepped closer to him and stared deeply into his eyes. “I thought I could live without him, but it turns out I ain’t complete unless he’s with me. God even Stuart told me he only ever sees me truly happy when I’m with him.” Callum shook his head a with a small chuckle. “I never thought I was enough for him, that he’d choose me…but now I think he has and am just prayin he hasn’t changed his mind.” With that he raised his hand to Ben’s cheek and slowly wiped a tear away.
Ben nestled his cheek fully into Callum’s hand, closing his eyes so he could fully feel the sensation of his touch. His whole body both soothed and electrified by it. “Course not ya idiot!” Ben whimpered though they tears. “I’ve loved you from the second I laid eyes on you in the Vic…I tried to fight it so many times…but you wedged yaself deep inside my heart. You’ve always seen the good in me, you always fought for me. You’re the only person who’s ever truly loved me for me…and I’m a better person now. I never felt like I deserved ya before but now…I feel like I’m someone worthy of ya love…And I know I’ve messed up but I won’t ever let ya down again. I’ll always choose you.”
Callum’s tears now began to cascade down his face. A few months ago he wouldn’t have believed Ben’s words, but looking into his right now, he knew every word was true. He pulled Ben’s face closer to his and leant in gently brushing his lips against Ben’s. Ben responded softly, the feel of Callum’s lips finally against his was dreamlike. He felt like he was floating on air. The kiss quickly deepened and he placed his hands around Callum’s waist pulling him closer. Both men felt like the air had been sucked out of their lungs. Both felt like they were on a major high and love was their drug. Both tasting the familiar taste and breathing in the familiar scent. Both felt like they’d finally found the right path that led them home. Eventually Callum broke the kiss, Ben reluctantly letting go after chasing his lips. “So this is it yeh. No more messing around. No more lies. Just us together for keeps.” His face showed Ben he was searching for the confirmation from him that he wanted it too.
“No more lies. No more hiding. Just me an you for keeps.” Ben echoed Callum’s words and gave him one final kiss. As they broke away Ben’s hands linked with Callum’s and he placed them at their sides, pulling their bodies close together. “Now not to ruin the romance of the moment or anythin…but I’ve got a new bedroom that is in desperate need of christening.”
Callum laughed warmly, “Oh yeh!”
“Oh God yeah!” Ben shouted. “I’ve been livin like a monk for months. I have some makin up to do.” He placed one final kiss on Callum’s lips before they walked towards Ben’s flat. “I do have one more question,” Ben stated as they walked.
“Go on…” Callum said nervously, wondering what Ben would want to know.
“How much has your brother been drinkin lately?” he tilted his head and raised his eyebrows.
Callum just laughed “Shut up!” he demanded softly.
“Make me!” Ben teased.
Callum pulled Ben in for another lingering kiss. “Oh intend to do the exact opposite!”
Ben was stunned he loved it when Callum was assertive. He felt a stirring in his groin, his eyes widened and darkened as he looked at Callum. “Home! Now!” he growled voice full of want. Callum raised his eyebrows before Ben dragged him towards the flat.
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Ben woke up and breathed deeply, inhaling a familiar scent that made him feel safe. His head was rested on the pillow of a firm chest and his body wrapped up in the muscular arms. He dared not open his eyes, it could just be the illusion that had so often been created by his dreams. If this was a dream he didn’t want it to end. After a few minutes of lying there he finally had the courage to open his eyes. The sight above him was one he would never tire of seeing. Callum sleeping, his hair soft and flopping to one side. His face angelic with his skin vibrant and glowing. He could watch him sleep forever, the beautiful man lying next to him was a piece of art Ben could never tire of looking at. The final piece of the puzzle had been put in the right place and Bens world was complete again. Callum had found his way back to him. Callum stirred a few minutes later and sleepily gazed down at Ben. A smile crept slowly over his face, when he saw Ben looking up at him. His fingers slowly threaded through Ben’s hair as Ben lightly stroked his back. They started at each other for minutes, neither speaking but both were actually enjoying the silence. Both relishing in the fact that everything they needed in that moment was lying in their arms. It was perfect, there were no words needed. Eventually Callum moved using his fingers to trace patterns on Ben’s back, the final one spelling out I love you. Ben responded, breaking the silence. “I love you more,” he stared gently. Callum just shook his head before kissing him, a slow tender kiss which told Ben how much he loved him. After kissing lazily for a few minutes, Ben pulled away and reached for his receiver before connecting it to his implant.
He lay back down on his side and Callum mirrored his position, so they lay facing each other. “God you’re beautiful!” Ben said as he ran his fingers through Callum’s soft hair.
Callum blushed, he would always blush no matter how many times Ben told him. “Flattery will get you everywhere, “he said raising his eyebrows suggestively.
“That’s what I’m bankin on!” Ben winked before grabbing him and pulling him in for a passionate kiss. It soon became heated, mouths open, tongues being allowed to explore and before they knew it they were making love again. Reacquainting themselves with each other’s bodies. Making each feel things that neither had for months. Lying there in the afterglow afterwards, feeling whole, satisfied, loved Ben didn’t want this to end. “So I’ve been thinking,” he said quietly.
“That’s dangerous,” Callum huffed with a cheeky grin.
“Oi!” Ben said as he gave him a painful slap. “It’s New Year in a couple of days and I was thinkin…maybe…we should start the year as we mean to go on.”
“Oh yeah…what with a bang?” Callum licked his lips suggestively as he smiled at Ben.
“Ooh I do love it when your dirty mind comes out to play,” Ben grinned, “but…erm…actually I was thinkin more…if I get to wake up with you on New Year’s Day then…I want to wake up with you everyday.” Callum’s eyes widened not sure what Ben was asking. “Don’t panic, I’m not proposing…maybe one day,” Ben winked, “But how would you feel about movin in.”
Callum beamed from ear to ear. His heart was doing cartwheels again. “Are you serious?” he asked.
“Well we practically lived together before, although it weren’t official…and like this has become a proper family home for me, with Lexi, Lo and Jay all being here…It’s just our family ain’t complete without you.” Ben shrugged. “We’ve wasted enough time. Don’t wanna waste anymore.”
Callum couldn’t hide the joy he was feeling. Then his smile faded slightly as a thought hit him. “Shouldn’t we ask the other members of the family first?”
Ben just laughed, “Are you kiddin? Think they like you more than me…But I’ll run it by em, it’s practical anyway. It’ll reduce the rent.” Ben smirked.
“Oh so it’s just a case of bein practical is it?” Callum scoffed.
“Mainly yeh.” Ben paused before clearing his throat. “That and the fact I kinda wanna fall asleep in your arms every night and wake up in em everyday.”
Callum’s huge beam returned. “Aww look at you. Gone all soft,” he chuckled lightly.
“Think one thing ya cant accuse me of is being all soft after the amount of times I’ve…” Ben tried to use humour again.
Callum was havin none of it, “Alright, alright. I’d love to complete your family. Course I’ll move in with ya. There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.”
They ran the idea by Jay, Lola and Lexi who couldn’t have been more thrilled. Stuart was sad to see Callum go but like he always said he wanted his brother to be happy. By New Year’s Eve Callum had moved in and he and Ben offered to babysit so Lola and Jay could go out. Lexi fell asleep before midnight and Ben carried her to bed. Callum lived up to his promise of seeing the New Year with a bang. As he their naked bodies lay tangled together afterwards Ben whispered “Happy New Year Callum!”
“Happy New Year Ben! Fresh start.” Callum replied softly.
“Fresh start!” Ben agreed and kissed Callum slowly. They had their whole lives together now and they intended to make every moment count.
*****************************
Although it was a beautiful sunny day, it was freezing and the wind blew strongly. Whoever thought it would be a good idea to visit the seaside in February must have been mad. Ben watched Callum, Lexi and Les ahead looking for shells in the sand. His heart was fit to burst with the love that it held. Pam linked his arm as she walked along side him. Smiling as she saw the love evident on Ben’s face. She told him once that one day she wanted him to bring someone special with him when he visited. She also once told him she wanted him to find someone who loved him as much as Paul did. Callum fitted the bill on both accounts and she couldn’t have been more happy for Ben. “Told you if you hung in there he’d come back to you!” she stated to Ben.
Ben grinned widely at the thought. “Have to admit…didn’t fancy my chances much at one point. Felt all the odds were against me…but I’m glad I took the chance and waited. He was worth the wait.”
“I’m so proud of you. You’ve finally seen the Ben we all see and love. We’re so happy for you and Paul would be too.” Pam choked up as she spoke, eyes welling up with tears.
“Thank you. You don’t know how much that means.” Ben gulped also overcome with emotion. They embraced each other tenderly and she gently cupped his cheek as they pulled away. The three ahead had stopped to look at something in the sand. Before long they caught them up. Ben walked in front of Callum and wrapped his arms around his waist, pulling him in for a kiss, soft and chaste but perfect in that moment. Before long Lexi joined them, positioning herself in the middle, wrapping her arms around both their waists. Callum and Ben both had an arm around Lexi but also linked to each other as they looked out into the sea. Callum looked across at his beautiful family, knowing that he was exactly where he should be, wherever they were. Ben turned to meet his gaze. Feeling overcome with joy and love. He didn’t think he’d ever felt happiness like this before. Turns out Pam was right, if you learn to love yourself life gets better. Sometimes you need to back yourself. Turns out if you manage to defy the odds and win, the reward can be everything you’ve ever dreamed of and more.